Are You Being Served Oh What a Tangled Web S4 Finale

are you looking at your watch for we've only been here a half an hour worried about Captain peacock I've never known him so late so I explained the situation to mrs. axial Bay well she said handsome is as handsome does that's just the trouble I said he didn't wanna use about you in that bias job well I've got an interview with a lady from personnel Oh whose personnel oh they send somebody down from head office and ask you a lot of questions usually it's a man and then of course it's a pushover I just wear a short skirt and cross my legs come out of there in a minute looky folder sunshine hip ah mrs. Slocombe just the lady I'm looking for do you miss out on the important engagement and you find that you cannot spare the time for that little extra standing on your coffer do you wake up in the morning feeling like you've been shot out of a cannon wish your air was like this but when you look in a mirror it looks like this what is that after ado display model for beauty box the new washable party wig you can watch it Sachi scree boil it and it still comes up PMBOK fresh other take it off and if you're not off the floor in one minute I shall report you to Captain peacock oh now you won't cookie I come in it and what's more you know mr. Rumbold secretary she ain't coming neither what's that supposed to mean nothing nothing not unless you happen to see them both come out of the duplicating cupboard together unless you see two hands cloth underneath the canteen table and what is more who did he keep using his blow tickler on a Christmas party oh yes oh no he's much too old yeah and she's ever succumbing done in a matter of being common darling you ain't exactly Easter rancid oh I'm sweet Liberty touched house only because they pulled down all the other ones round no sign of Captain peacock yet no I've never known him so late mr. Grainger as matter of fact I was just saying to mr. Lucas that I'd never known him so late wasn't I mr. Luke oh you were you were miss Rupp freeze it's and I was just saying that mr. Rumbold secretary wasn't in yet either no that's right he did he just said that mr. Rumbold secretary wasn't in yet either then he went like that what did you mean by that have you noticed it's been going on ever since the Christmas party I said we shouldn't have had mistletoe it always causes trouble yeah it was the postman's not there's very badly organised I got a parcel with 12 stamps on it called out for three and got the night watchman you're lucky I got mrs. Slocombe I didn't see Captain peacock at all letting me well he was with mr. Rumbold secretary yeah and then he told her that we were going to play sardines and he took her into the broom cupboard we'd never have found him yet except Dakota caught his Blue tickler in the door she said she'd missed her last bus so he said he'd give her a lift home to reading he was last seen surrounded by policemen playing Amazing Grace on a breathalyzer bath let University of Greek men's apparel assistant 13 speaking unlucky for song oh no mrs. peacock can I help ya mrs. peacock yeah she wants to know if Captain peacock got back safely from his conference in Birmingham circumference it burn he hadn't weaned was sales conference in Barbie you can't tell her that I know no it's not convenient at the moment you've come straight through to a fitting room how's that for you sir oh it's fine it's fine just fine I'm just selling five Robertson with a spot under the moon yes captain peacock is dealing with a customer elsewhere probably in Redding he's probably embedding I'll give him your message as soon as he comes on the floor and get him to ring you I see you'll ring him yourself bye bye mrs. peacock thank you what about that man well it proves one thing he hasn't been oh I do hope he hasn't gone off the rails I give myself you know when I was in bathroom fittings there was a girl in haberdashery I got her into trouble but with the supervisor in the club you mean the social club the pudding club you think you invented it your berries now oh and there she is don't let him see us look in oh it's disgusting tell you to ignore each other did you see that did you see that terry honest no nothing is happening good morning captain peacock good morning mrs. Logan good afternoon captain P as I am a bit later there's a reason of course yeah and here it comes hey the next object is a lie whole lot so I'm afraid I overslept it so did mrs. peacock and the alarm failed to go off yes well the alarms gone off all right now mrs. peacock just phoned what could you certain you wanted to know if you got back all right how thoughtful of her from your sales conference in Bali well I could explain that we better explain to her now immense really made yeah oh hello my dear how sweet of you to ring what on earth makes you think that I wasn't in bearing him but how could your your brother have seen me driving through ready but darling there must be lots of lots of Ford's with it with a broken rear window missing hubcaps and a dent in the rear wing huh well if he had a girl whether that proves it wasn't me where was I when you last cold imbedding I was embedding you're not reading bedding look there there's really no need for you to come over here to talk about anything we can easily have a little chat when I get home no no no look I must go we've got a lot of customers okay yeah that's that's fine yes you've been a very attentive young man Thank You mr. Robinson and don't worry force problems a bit long it's bound to ride up with where as you can hear there we are very busy yes bye-bye darling all this must seem a bit strange to you now when you watch Coronation Street don't worry Stephen will back you up man you're referring to the rumors that there is something between mr. Rumbold secretary and myself I must categorically denied it should remember not here mr. rumba wants to see you we don't have to make a secret about that I'll be there in a minute she just came to tell me that mr. rumble wishes to see me yeah cause it's none of my business but while you're in there I should get Rumble to back up your story about the sales conference in Birmingham well I can't overlook your lateness I shall have to forward this report coming ah I solidity a moment peacock I'm just taking down the details of why my secretary was so very late this morning now let's just run over this and you spent the night with Stephen in a car shelter no now he's my friend Stephanie Carr shortened and by mistake in the morning she took the Homburg from the bedside table humbag huis hand back with your season ticket in it and by the time she returned you were late do you have anything else to add oh sure she hasn't no sir yes but I can't promise that you won't hear more of this let's that's all I can't help feeling that that girl's getting into bad company yeah a peacock you two were rather late this morning no connection sir wasn't suggesting that there was but I would like an explanation there was up there for reasons I'd rather not go into now I told mrs. peacock that I was with you with a sales conference in Birmingham but I wasn't at a sales conference in Birmingham I know that but couldn't you pretend that we were the sales conference in Birmingham is this some kind of game no sir but if mrs. peacock ask you it's it's absolutely vital that you bear up my story after all we have known each other 14 years man and boys were I'm sorry a peacock but I was in London last night and our friendship is not strong enough to make me say that I was 90 miles away in Birmingham Watford Gap round out here my Secretary's father yes we were rather wild about it too but there's no cause for alarm and she spent the night with Stephen in a car shelter Stefaniuk our shelter it's my glasses with Stephanie in Carshalton I see oh dear well you better do as you think best hmm yes goodbye these young girls all the tissue of lies father phone Stephanie and you can guess the rest she didn't spend a night in casualty precisely is he an inkling where she did spend the night no no but but he's coming here to see the girl and find out I suppose it's absolutely out of the question now the rest of the day off Rambo's here mrs. Cameron from personals coming over in five minutes to interview mrs. Slocombe is adore itis uses your office sure she has a port hmm well that will be all peacock savers will be most helpful hello peacock I tell you what I can do I can try to be elsewhere if mrs. peacock calls hmm thank you sir get me mrs. Slocombe will you oh it's Jackie as for you mrs. Luka my underwear Oh in your office mr. Rumbold oh yes thank you very much wish me luck I'm going to be interviewed now with the lady from personnel you know I think I'll wear my glasses let me look old huh I mean I don't want to look too young for the job on the other hand I want to look too old maybe who I captain beagle me yes up to a point must mr. Rambo helpful and let's put it this way if one were drowning mr. Rambo would be the first to hold out an electric cow prod yeah Captain peacock short the good news or the bad news get on with it what is it what is the bad news your wife has just cut through the main doors and the good news is there's a sailor bulletproof vest on spoke before you know what I do in cases like this I just bare my soul and reveal everything and run like hell I'd be most grateful if you'd both stay within earshot she won't make a scene in public Samba is a lift blimey the Warriors Nevada is not my wife this is my work Steven oh hello my dear I didn't expect to see you where were you when dear if you're going to prevaricate with me I shall kick you right in the middle of the gentlemen's department you discuss this when I get home bye sweet you won't be going home they're changing the locks now my precious I think we were going to the old comrades dance tonight you promised to press my dinner jacket I've kept my promise I have pressed it right down the lavatory and I pull the chain what we bought that did a jacket together I remember it was an export reject I need your shoes as well with your shirt and not to mention polishing the silver with your tie and sweeping the chimney with your pajamas you're gonna domesticate it is that girl when chill what girl oh I heard all about you at the Christmas party with your blue tickler you know disgraceful you were a figure of fun I was not a figure of fun I behaved with perfect dignity is that not serviced average by rank captain peacock and the stories about your blue tickler or a gross exaggeration even use it after you trapped in the broom cupboard a let me tell you this Deacon peacock you've used your blue tickler for the last time I'm going to see mr. Rumbold and when I told him everything about you you'll be back where you started sweeping up in the stockroom the lady from personnel just called to say she's sorry for the delay she won't be a minute oh that's quite all right enter is this mr. rumbles office yes that's right where is he well I dunno but I'm sure you'll be back before love do you work for him well yes I do you're over 1 they're not sure oh I didn't say Lee hopes ooh you're older than I expected only a little over 40 and do i do Cecil shouldn't I have all the enthusiasm of a younger woman combined with a great deal of experience you're pretty cool aren't you of course it's not the first time I've been up for this sort of thing you've done it before have you oh yes I believe jumping at every opportunity anything to get out of underwear well there isn't much room behind the counter for a woman of my imagination you are very outspoken natural well you know what us northerners are you were in reading bunch of reading oh come along now tell me the truth why you all were you're not in reading will it help if I said I was I knew it that's all I need to know do you want to know any details I've got quite enough for my solicitor to send the necessary documents and I shall see to it that your name appears in every newspaper then they'll all know you for what you are famous last and from now on you can take care of the gallant Stephen peacock you can iron his shirts and darn his socks and you can bring up his early morning tea when he's sitting up in bed in those hideous striped pajamas they never mentioned anything about that when the advertiser say on the notice boat captain peacock you want the bad news or the very bad news get to the point what do the girls father's here on the premises looking for the man but spent the night with his daughter glass of water for Captain peacock I should save it till he's had the very bad news mrs. peacock was last seen chasing mr. Slocum down the staff there dear nobody everywhere I'm Brenda mr. Granger would you take over for a few moments please there you stand by to make it permanent then they're just easier than editing the hell's so mr. Burrage are you free I'm very free free you take over me while I take over for Captain peacock ever from you mister I'm Prince alive stay standing here just look at that action did that job for 15 years the mind is willing but the bunions a week you take over from mrs. Slocombe it don't look like she got the job Hey look huh - cool father look good morning sir can I be of any help are you the person in charge of this department I am here sir so you're the one is ruin my daughter's reputation you mean the girl was in heaven - there's another one but that was 25 years ago but you're still at it see this this was for my daughter's wedding next week now a fiance has walked out on her and why all because of you onions you sit down the screens are you alright what yes I said are you alright no of course I'm not alright how can I be alright with currents in both ears I'm going to see you you know you do that mr. Granger don't forget the simulated cream up the nostrils good afternoon it house this mr. grace has very kindly agreed to preside this sort of inquiry into the affair concerning Captain peacock on my secretary I would like to take you the word affair being used at the stage there has been no affair he wasn't using the word affair in that sense it shall be called the occurrence I'm going to sue for that good sue for what mr. Granger the currents in my ear Alex faint and we haven't got to your current yet no they're very deep you probably have to be anesthetized and syringe and carry on LLL catch up we also have to consider the case of the assault by mrs. peacock or mrs. Slocombe an assault witnessed by mr. Harmon yes yeah I had one up my nose but I got doubt water up your nose salty darlin we are talking about mrs. Slocombe she gets up everyone's knows don't start I am just in the mood that was Joel us what was Joe last mr. great mood yes yes you're quite right sir but we're discussing the assault on mrs. Slocombe yes those terrible fellows those bad boys you know excuse me show us our a coffee while we sorted out as far as we've got no we must get on we also have to consider the cake on mr. Granger's head with the cream up the nose added Lee Clarence in the ears you're rambling did you get all that down every word cross adapt so if we took things in the order in which they happened we might avoid confusion hmm some boats we'll have to send for every Queen we would be the best Ellery to send for her I think perhaps you're right captain peacock mr. grace and I most anxious that at the end of the day every party our concern should leave this room completely satisfied does that include mr. Gracey secretary as well still Lucas this is a serious matter my whole future the grace brothers is at stake well I think you should be sent right off well mr. Lucas is a material witness to you being hit on the head yeah I was the one who cheated he said it's no laughing matter she could well have suffered brain damage if hadn't been for the fact she died you air double lacquered for the interview mr. Harmon asked my secretary to come in with you but you certainly sir I have kept mrs. peacock separate from her case they got together and have each other on the carpet also taken the liberty of confiscating her umbrella calling me by the crazy way I do take a seat you see is pretending to ignore I bet it's been going on for years I know the miss Hazelwood I'm going to ask you a direct question I have no right to do so and of course you don't have to answer it and if you do answer it nobody's going to hold it against you or use it in any future proceedings do you understand yes god he seems worth it happening did you or did you not spend the night with Captain peacock the object a spend at night has many connotations one can spend the night quite innocently in someone's company if you mean did you have an affair with me they'd say so oh very well did you have an affair with Captain peacock certainly not Hey well that's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard her he's upset Oh some thinkable you made your point possessor would explain no would have been quite sufficient just so tired just fell out of my left ear I thought he was a Karen but he too salty Thank You mr. Granger shall I put it on the table edge it should be a dam I've dropped it miss Browns are sitting on it yeah look at that it's still worn a bit flat but it's still wore an army and cubit a wagon yeah much better now I think the only way to settle this is for me to give a detailed account in front of my wife of all the precise circumstances that led to this unfortunate chain of events you know says is I think all right mr. Harmon asked mrs. peacock to come in will you call her would you pick up please sit down this is captain peacocks wife sir she need me is that her that is my secretary yes yeah when I was in the Navy we had a petty officer just like that I noticed she didn't burst into tears when she thought it was me funny that sorry it was such a shock first of all there have been rumors for some time that I've been paying attention to miss hazel it has been said that at the Christmas party I pursued her with my blue tickler QB 1 blue kicker I should like to make it better to care that I pursued everybody with my blue tickler I'll second that you know we all did a lot of blow tickling I think we can ignore that cross out the blue tickly secondly it has been said that I held mrs. Alberts hand at the canteen that is true ah now we're getting down to the grit in it dick I was comforting her especially was frightened by the toad in the old discussing marriage emotional woman isn't she managed her forthcoming marriage her fiance that she was asking my advice I was against it I thought she was too young and it experienced so you took her out to give her some experience but on the night in question she was distressed so I took her to peppers cafe for a coffee Oh big spender I tried to dissuade her from the irrevocable step of getting there because I got me experience I didn't say that now but you looked it challenged ego please break clean I succeed him she found her fiance and called it off am I correct yes there's a remarkable effect on women oh he was so good-looking and now he's got nobody story Marlowe this is what was in her in a stick similar to the one you see her now so I I thought it best to run her home in my car six miles outside reading I broke down it was raining in there I tried to restart but there must have been an electrical fault because there was no current in my bed early I thought the currents were in Grange is he Vanessa that was a Sultana very complicated history we waited until dawn when the patrol van started me up again just a minute just a minute what happened between the time the car broke down and daylight I suggested that miss hazel would climb into the bed that's exactly what I would have done I sat behind the wheel all night trying to think what the same to the woman I loved why not jump in the front for a quick cuddle quiet Lucas foolishly I asked Mr Rumble to to purge himself quite correctly he refused so to do for after all when the final account is balanced up in the book of life we are men of integrity what I've said is true and I swear it as a god-fearing man an annex officer of the Royal Army service car mrs. peacock if ever I've heard the truth from ellipse of the man I've heard it today I'm sure you can doubt your husband no longer I didn't think people talk like they sent him up darling I believe you well that's all settled then and on behalf of grace brothers may we hope that you will both sail life's stormy seas into the calm waters of old age safely and irremovable together we probably shall you you

Channel: Kris

Views: 2,168,935

Rating: 4.7091651 out of 5

Keywords: Are, You, Being, Served, Oh, What, Tangled, Web, S4, Finale360p, 264, AAC

Id: WGQpSTXKR34

Length: 29min 43sec (1783 seconds)

Published: Thu Jun 14 2012