Weird DM's: Expensive Mistakes

before you put me on your second monitor or walk away to go do your stupid laundry press the like i'm not gonna make a big deal out of it what's up everyone welcome to another video today's video is a fun one it's a continuation of you know a series i love which is weird dms [Music] now the theme for today's video is expensive mistakes and this one is special and i'll tell you why recently i started requiring video submission because you know i want to be able to see someone tell the story and feel like i'm getting the truth feel like i'm hearing something that's real but today is different today's stories were so uncomfortable for people to put their face behind that they only sent text all the submissions were text so i said fine i'll honor your desire to be anonymous but i still want to feel the drama i still want to feel like i'm getting it first hand so i hired a bunch of people on to read your stories for you so strap in and get ready to hear some crazy ass maybe you got a pair of headphones or maybe you have a pair of raycon headphones to listen to this crazy ash which is the sponsor of today's video i'm sorry if you don't know what raycon is it is a premium wireless audio company for half the price of the rest of the market without compromise they're different from other brands out there and the way they design their products and the way they price them raycon offers their wireless earbuds in a range of colors patterns and a variety of fit options no stems no cords the company was co-founded by ray j a lot of people love raycon even mike tyson the best part about this product is they have a 45 day return policy check these bad boys out what's that what'd you say sorry i got my rakons in so i can't hear shh these things got six hours of play time they're bluetooth compatible they let me walk around and do whatever while i'm listening to whatever so if you're interested click the link in the description or go to buy raycon.com noelle miller and get 15 off your order all right now let's get into the video story number one i don't know anything about it other than it's just number one long mistake number one so let's get into it i wanted to get into flipping i thought it would be a good idea to make an extra buck i heard about these kfc scented fire logs and that they were limited edition and will go up in value i believed i could make around 200 percent per one in resale profit holidays were coming up and so i bought a sh on for this easy flip for a white elephant gift one thousand dollars in kfc fire logs from walmart and it took over my entire living room each one weighed over six pounds and smelled like kfc i couldn't sell a single one without losing money due to fees low demand shipping weight cost i still have all of them i'm known as the kfc fire log guy yo what first of all i didn't even know that exit what bro drop the link right now i think everyone watching this wants to know about the kfc fire log dude i want one of these let me buy one off you for half of what you paid dog how did you think you were gonna make money flipping firewood with 11 secret herbs and spices are you serious you could have just gone down and chopped out a local tree sprinkled some i don't know some cumin on this and that could have been your ebay store you didn't have to go with all i just want to know where did you get this like even did you buy a pallet of chicken flavored fire logs man chicken flavored wood you should not be trying to pedal this to humans you should be trying to sell it the dogs that's what this is a glorified dog toy listen man here's how you make your money back okay you start a youtube prank channel you go light i don't know 10 of these in the middle of a college campus at 3 a.m and just see how many students come running out rabid looking for kfc halfway to a hangover just like i heard those chicken here that's a hell of a mistake man chicken flavored wood all right that was a great one to start um a one-liner here we go what's this i spent almost eight hundred dollars for prostitutes and i only got nudes out of it i went to my bank and said it was fraud to get my money back no you didn't no you didn't no you didn't man first of all how ugly do you have to be to hire a sex worker and she doesn't want to show up to work it's not her fault it's you it's you you catfished her she saw your face and said now hold on that's not that's not the work i signed up for it's cause i'm freelances i mean i have to do every job sir that's so crazy yeah i'm not trying to take a chunk out of your confidence man but maybe you got to realize that at the price you offered there's no demand you might be really overvaluing what it would cost to do you know what i'm saying like you think maybe you're a 800 but if we took a survey of you know a thousand sex workers it might come back you know you're more like a 900 900 000 job rather than 800 you know what i mean don't be mad at her if i'm your bank rep i'm laughing at you and i'm not issuing your money back you said what sir so you hired her uh-huh and she only sent you newt is this you on your bank um yeah i don't i don't know if that's fraud man you might you should be happy that she sent the pictures if i'm from being real either way yeah that's um that's an expensive mistake man in high school i like this girl so for her birthday i bought her a tiffany necklace and two tickets to cedar point which is and y'all hear that that's the sound of my twitch chat i'ma run that back this is exactly my twitch chat how it looks and sounds hold on let it go in high school i like this girl so for her birthday i bought her a tiffany necklace and two tickets to cedar point yeah that's about you know good 30 40 of my twitch chat right there anyways continue for her birthday i bought her a tiffany necklace and two tickets to cedar point which is an amusement park i thought she would take me with her but she ended up asking her best friend to go and instead asked if i could drive them being the dumbass that i am i said yes and ended up waiting in the parking lot for about seven hours just to drive them home the whole thing ended up costing me about 500 and my dignity i was down so bad i'm really enjoying having other people read this man this is a whole different experience i'm loving this bro all right tiffany's necklace and you drove him to cedar point well you're you're a dummy for for taking them there why would you do that when they say can you take us to cedar point say yeah absolutely and you should have drove him to the first bus stop and been like all right this is it it's like what about cedar point yeah this bus gets you to see your point this car doesn't but that bus will thanks no thanks and you should have took the tickets back right there and just sent them on their way i can't even call that an expensive mistake you didn't have to follow through you had so many opportunities to bail and you committed you cost yourself your dignity all right that that's a rather than expensive mistake that's an expensive lesson important distinction i paid 300 to meet a random ass white boy band for 10 seconds that's it that's the whole story [Laughter] [Music] that's 40 of twitter users right there stay on twitter that's you guys i'm gonna run it back i want you to hear yourself i paid 300 to meet a random ass white boy band for 10 seconds that's it that's the whole story yeah i want to know who this dude is and he's hired every future weird dms he's hired this dude is money man i'm a broke-ass college student and i paid 3k out of pocket for a circumcision because she said we'd probably break up if i didn't get one i had bro first of all that's the most expensive fade you'll ever pay for secondly when they say get a fresh cut to impress a lady that's not what they mean they do not mean foreskin son come on dude do you have no loyalty to yourself your foreskin was with you for life you didn't even know that girl what a couple years and you threw your best friend away for nothing i'm ashamed of you man i had a medical condition meaning i had to get one but in my country we have a good health care system whereby i could have gotten it for free in six to seven months time or gotten it done asap for 3k we broke up like two months after i got the operation honestly the biggest l i've ever taken in my life and i'll never let myself simp out again all right so i spoke too soon but still you paid 3k for for prime snipping that's what you did amazon prime snipping you paid 3k to get a little bit quicker and it didn't matter she still left she left you and you couldn't even beat your meat afterward that's cruel ah damn all right next the only redeemable quality about living in the uk is the fact that you can get a free mug flurry with any meal at mcdonald's if you present your student card you know what's crazy about the uk is this dude could literally be 15 or 55. the bermuda triangle is not in the middle of the ocean it's the uk and it doesn't relate to things disappearing it's just time i took advantage of this deal one night when i was very drunk after going clubbing i hopped into bed to enjoy my meal and took my laptop out to listen to an audio book because my phone had died and my flatmate had taken my charger obviously the dolson tones of stephen fry narrating chamber of secrets audiobook lulled me to sleep sooner than i'd anticipated i woke up in the morning am i shut the [ __ ] up man you left the club alone and got a mcflurry and you concluded the night with a audiobook whatever you're about to say next oh boy it's the loneliest ever in a minute all right i'm being a bit harsh let me let this finish i woke up in the morning and my free mcflurry had spilled all over the keys of my macbook and i've been coagulating there for hours you may be shocked to find out that applecare does not cover this instance stop lying man you had other substance coagulating on your keys you're just trying to you know those is a little cover-up that was a little we know what you did you weren't there's no audiobook we knew you were [ __ ] cat but still very expensive mistake my guy most expensive mistake of my life cost me my bank account yo stop we were just talking about audiobooks this sounds like an audiobook right here imagine you're reclining in your 42 ryanair seat on your way to iceland at a heathrow you put in your headphones and this is audible most expensive mistake of my life cost me my bank account eight years of my life and most of my sanity it began in high school when i was introduced to a group of religious home school kids through a friend ended up dating one of the girls when i was 14 i'm pretty sure this is the beginning to peter rabbit right first girlfriend the ultimate girl next door see at the church on sunday tight fit with the perfect family and everything we dated through high school and it went mostly okay until we graduated and we started talking about getting married i know how dumb it is but that's how life is in these midwestern farm towns i'm in i like this story keep going her family was something they were ultra conservative religious folks and that was fine but it wasn't my style so i tried to be respectful choosing that instead of arguing about stuff when i told them i wasn't ready to be getting married but i wanted to stay in the relationship they whole ass had an intervention a religious one my then fiance at the time had been invited to dinner with her family when she was ambushed by her family where they tried to convince her that staying with me was an urge from the devil and that i was a demon or some [ __ ] the intervention didn't work but it made me loathe her family and we ended up getting married almost out of 20 year old spite she cheated on me with my best friend served me divorce papers at work after two years and took most of my bag while dumping me with the house right before the market took a shot anyways that relationship introduced me to weed yes yo run that back with a street fighter like combo like [Music] she cheated on me with my best friend served me divorce papers at work for two years and took most of my bag right before the market anyways that relationship introduced me to weed and then your channel so here i am and that's not a bad deal thanks for the free therapy love you know and just so it's clear i think it goes without saying that i'm not smart holy [ __ ] yeah that's an expensive mistake man jesus christ dude jesus christ do you think she filled out those divorce papers after or before between your best friend did she look your best friend or was she like i'm definitely leaving this dude now you're in an empty house smoking weed all alone listen man if you want to try like some insurance fraud type stuff to maybe try to flip your your life around i know a dude with a thousand kfc fire logs and we could get that fire burning and burn that house down you know what i mean these are jokes these are jokes if you're an insurance company watching this i'm kidding but my my boy really does have the hook up on you know kfc fire logs so if you need something let me know well i think that's going to do it for today's video i mean i i hope you're entertained i was fully blown away i don't know if i can let you all read the stories anymore or tell them you know i think these actors did a very you know convincing and you know better job i mean they killed it so big thanks to them uh big thanks to raycon for sponsoring this video and yeah i'll see you guys on the next one [Music] peace yeah i might lose a few ask me if i give a [ __ ]

Channel: Noel Miller

Views: 507,043

Rating: 4.9895644 out of 5

Keywords: noel miller, tiny meat gang, cody ko, tmg, love island, steamy tweets, suki, fortnite, games, cody and noel, uncle noel, thats cringe, thenoelmiller, noelle miller, comedy, satire, vine, rap, sketch comedy, roast, stand up

Id: W14c6mT5YzE

Length: 15min 4sec (904 seconds)

Published: Wed Apr 14 2021