r/Tumblr | Tumblring Further Down the Tumblr Abyss

she's out there making owl noises oh I can't believe I just started the video like that anyways our / tumblr here we go again oh and multiple disclaimer what if instead of calling each other names we refer to each other by our most dominant feature like hey nose or hey too much eyeliner that's usually called bullying work smarter not harder huh oh listen buster at minimum wage I'm not doing either it's off deer walking around a cemetery someone an old God a spirit someone's reincarnation dear thinking and and I get out of here with these fences all over the place you ever wake up from a dream like damn I guess I'm not coping with bad as well as I thought I was okay so today I put my hand on my backpack and felt a stress ball and I was like oh I have a stress ball and I squeezed it and it was a pear and it exploded and now I'm much more stressed than I was earlier video game engines are amazing because they can make it so sunlight filters through leaves casting dozens of little rays in your eyes just like in real life and then you turn around and there's a whole ass or it's just swimming in circles in midair but faster all of this just works it's not I'm not kidding I liked a little map on door - because you can watch your delivery driver completely miss your address in real time Daniel you are going the completely wrong direction let me help you Daniel Daniel I am hungry I am opening my mouth like a baby bird Daniel why does this look like Old English posting is it it's a P era being it's it's picniced their thickness was poppin Jimbo that's a thorn that that little half be half feel akin abomination makes the sound that says thickness that is a posting oh the discovered time travel in 2017 this is an old pose I got a live feed camera so I could see what my dogs are up to while I'm at work the hell is the German Shepherd doing I'm gonna guess that they are normally allowed to sit on the furniture [Music] I gotcha so I'm editing a story and I forgot to put up negative in there holy [ __ ] although he will admit she does have skin that's a definite plus well I mean having skin is a definite plus it's October who needs the skin hit it I [Music] want to write a D&D campaign but just play by myself and Dungeon Master myself I have been informed that this is called writing a book okay so is Andrew Garfield actually gay or is he just really really extra about its ally ship statement was released when I asked about his sexuality Garfield identified himself as heterosexual but has said that he has an openness to any impulses that may arise within me at any time mr. Garfield what the does this mean good read that Garfield straited Dilli Authority can you not just say Garfield please I'm sorry John Garfield says while pushing the lasagna away with is a read what time is it you ask I pull out my 2.7 metric ton granite sundial and immediately crushed both of your beef I have loudly announce oh it's cloudy Danny DeVito turned 70 today which is weird because I've never had any concept of how old he is I like to think he exists outside of time and space okay but more importantly it means no one was aware of him being 69 last year we up I can't believe it we really thought when you open up your fifth-grade sketchbook is is that a reaction image you are or an example yes hey Ryan I've heard that people are calling you Ryan what told you that when the Allegra kicks it Allegra verified hi please follow indirect messages so we can learn more thanks the corporate version of hey Opia what's up does this mean you don't have to fake them to help your partner's ego the guy I lost my virginity to wrote a play about the experience and the character based on me gave a monologue about how she regretted sleeping with him because no one else would ever be that good so yeah just just tell him you didn't I'm sorry he wrote up what I was going to make a bad text pose but I imagine dr. Phil reading it out loud to me on his show and the whole crowd booing me so I decided not to I should probably apply this philosophy of my Twitter account Harvey ball creator of the smiley face he looks like he has seen the devil with his own two eyes good for him who here knows how to dismantle a security camera okay everyone gather around everybody on here always acts like some criminal mastermind but in reality 40 of you guys told me to smash it with a rock and at least three of you told me to seduce it indie head of 2015 RPG with meta fictional elements that can be won with pacifism and challenges conventional RPG morality indie hit of 2017 psychological horror game disguised as an anime dating simulator that deconstructs breaking the fourth wall in the aid of 2019 you are a goose who is also a bastard yaagh climate change fight should be sexy and fun Japan's new environmental minister says but what no let the man speak decommission kids rides on a scrapyard Japan the council you stand before them after you die and they decide if you go to heaven genuinely enjoys the taste of sour candy who the says I'm going to eat this sugary sweet coated in pain salt and I'm gonna can like it me if my eye isn't twitching it's not sour enough my local rock station you're listening to rock King Rock we're Harnish all the other stations are wimpy little snow flakes we're not playing rock like we do hardrock rock and metal and King wrong up next twenty one pilots followed by imagine dragons being a we've necks nightcore honky tonk badonkadonk that can't be real nightcore she thinks my tractor's sexy this is proof God doesn't exist why just just why I googled it I listened to it and it exists and now it's in my browser history exciting news incognito mode god damn it my unity recommendations are do you not understand uh uh god I hate being alive I just want to die in a national park under mysterious circumstances okay I'm done being dramatic I finally started my homework and it's not that bad we call musicals unrealistic because people randomly burst in a song but I've been a home alone for like three days and I started singing about what I'm doing every five minutes singing and musicals perfect harmonies we're all in this together I can't sing that should be pretty obvious singing to myself one no totally heating up some soup heating up some soup you put it in the microwave and watch it spin around you put the beeps in the chili pilot makes it taste bad Jim Henson the Muppet Master Jim Henson's first sketches of Oscar the Grouch I love this so much look at how judgmental the third one is it just it just speaks to me in my ideal form a greater me why do we have the phrase bone dry when bones spend most their time being very wet hmm maybe because when you touch a bone it feels really dry bones are porous so they actively suck the moisture out of your fingers that is so much more unsettling than my original question thank you hash tag Christ why she literally got a drink of water and then walked over my boots and spit the water in them was it revenge for the braids so my internship waz was talking about how he had to work in a mailroom to make ends meet during college where he only made $6 an hour and well watch this if we put it in a calculator here and it's January 1984 $6 an hour and do a little bit a quick math to find the same buying power in modern day we get $18.73 this is why my generation is angry about the minimum wage fun fact in Idaho at 7:25 so you know there's that so apparently people talk to their pets and baby voices but when I see my cat I'm just like a brad and he's like meow and the conversation is over I don't know why but for some reason that bag of your cat's name is Brad it's hilarious to me bedtime was half an hour ago my six-year-old just walked out bleary-eyed and asked his father of a duck as a predator some things are too important to go to bed without knowing and if you're curious they most certainly are predators one day I want to take a video of yardstick straight up hurling himself into the void cats have no conception that there is a future there is just now and the jingling toy your cat's name is yardstick yeah yeah three feet oh my god that's so cute god dammit that post broke me bad jokes by Jeff a six-year-old boy goes to work with his father I bring your kid to work day after about thirty minutes of arriving the kid starts crying loudly the whole office gathers around the father asks the kid what's the matter son the kid replies where all the clouds you say you work okay Jeff you know at this point you've got to change your URL shower thoughts official you can probably tell which family member is coming upstairs by their step pattern but you wouldn't be able to pick out your own okay if my own footprints were coming down the hall towards me I reckon I would have a bigger problem on my hands me I think my computer's broken boss just give it to the IT guy me okay walks outside and tosses my laptop into the sewer good luck I misunderstood this boats and that they were in blind tech people live in sewers and I just degree then went along with it self help tip do one thing a day that scares you text someone first ask your crush to hang out purposely irritate a wild raccoon cactus the only they just stopping you is yourself do not forget this if you censor anything in a post you are legally required to put all the emitted vowels at the end of the footnote EEE oh okay then if you're sure about this Old MacDonald had a farm eieio I'm going to shadow you like glass okay I love you guys but I think a lot of you are the kind of people who are susceptible to falling in with a cult you're right we should all band together in a trustworthy and influential leader who can keep us safe from outside threats yesterday I learned one of my co-workers is terrified of people running on all fours yesterday one of my co-workers learned I'm an expert at running on all fours we've set a truce we're gonna go get noodles people don't trust autonomous vehicles Oh jagwire is testing having them make eye contact with you why why why jag why wow I feel so much better thanks good job now when I Molotov a self-driving car I can see it's live leave it sighs it's this really gonna make me trust a vehicle more no I'm gonna think it's judging me while I'm walking across the street god damn it I'm gonna feel more self-conscious now because of this like just all the cars are staring at me as I walk across the street ah Jesus Christ my players thank you so much for dungeon mastery this campaign seems super cool so far me hiding the fact that I started this adventure solely to make the final boss an evil face chef named guy ferry who runs a cooking Empire called flavortown II yeah no problem silverfish if those little bug things that look like centipedes yeah come om FG I hate them so much Oh in Minecraft I thought you met the real whines yeah hey hey what do you mean the real ones where do you think the name came from I don't know tumblr user plump nine thousand I sort of thought they weren't real like Enderman or creepers implying Enderman aren't real really not liking what you're implying a buddy the fresh adult dating site that makes it easy to fight casual sex near you joy it free it is someone new instantly and a hook-up tonight this entire posts a mess what do you mean they're real wise what do you think they have came from I don't know tumblr use your plumb 9000 I sort of thought they weren't real like other bitter creepers implying other men aren't real really not liking when you're implying buddy the fresh adult dating site makes it easy to find casual sex near you joy plated sub would do instantly it'll captain I Jesus Christ dear Netflix please stop forcing me to look at making big mouth every time I open Netflix this should be considered a crime I wholeheartedly agree because I go onto Netflix to watch the occasional guilty pleasures show but no I'm suddenly forced to watch a preview for the animated abomination known as big mouth look at him I'll get it luckily they are clear orange juice oh it's empty very stupid ace hey welcome to the outro I mean you made it this far so you probably enjoyed the video unless you're a masochist I mean there is that option I guess you haven't already subscribed for more of my content that would be pretty cool make sure you're subscribed so you can turn on the notification bell and find out whenever I upload my next video ya see y'all next time

Channel: Oz Media

Views: 1,331,426

Rating: 4.9630003 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, reddit cringe, satire, comedy, funny, r/tumblr, wholesome memes, wholesomememes, best of tumblr, tumblr, tumblr posts

Id: nS9z5N3qs0Q

Length: 16min 28sec (988 seconds)

Published: Wed Oct 16 2019