r/Technicallythetruth | that name is unavailable.

it all the title says it all it sure did what's up guys and welcome back to Ma my name is Damian and today we're looking through our slash technically the truth what would happen if I put a sleeping pill on my coffee ha it'll go Boop oh thanks cute little coffee right five words you can spell five words you can spell very clever NASA is investigating what may be the first crime in outer space with astronaut and McLane accused of identity theft and improperly accessing her estranged wife's private financial records while on the ISS despite making up roughly 49% of the population women are responsible for 100 percent of the crimes in space the coolest kind when you order 12 things at once on Amazon but only get one shipping notification uh yeah it's all coming together who are you and how did you get in here I'm a locksmith and I'm a locksmith Phaneuf you like some coffee or some tea Oh mouse many I have something to tell you hey you'd be scared to of a 6-inch tall naked human sprinted across your floor now invite him for a small cookie and a check write these words in alphabetical order take act value aloof use a suit royal alluri my man got a hundred percent this is an aerial view of ancient Rome from 5,200 feet this is a Times New Roman view of ancient Rome from 5,200 feet hey thanks get lost in nature and you will quite possibly die well I thought I was gonna find myself but I guess that's understandable my friend don't worry there's plenty of fish in the sea the fish in the sea all cutie pies look at them how Americans think Europeans see the USA Los Angeles hot Neha New York and Disney World how we actually see well you see he have the nasal retinas the temporal retina we have a primary visual cortex and then you have the optical lenses and the temporal retina and the eye which goes to the optic nerve from the optic chiasma all going to the LGN as are all going to the lgnore the lateral geniculate nucleus you understand that choose a name for your game choose wisely as it can't be changed later okay I'll be named wisely very funny choose a name for your game choose wisely as it can't be changed later okay changed later it can't be changed later please type another name ok another name I'm getting sick of you I'm just doing what you asked what we see what animals with a color range larger than ah see yeah well there you go the same strip of colors statistics show that teen pregnancy drops off significantly after age 25 well yeah then it's no longer teen pregnancy you idiot it's not even a study it's just a blatant statement find the person who doesn't pay taxes can't find them it's cuz they're right here fact babies are idiot leeches and don't frickin pay taxes so that really the hill you want to die on quackety banks hate him see how he made $10,000 in a single afternoon with one simple trick he robbed the store Barack Obama well who's that specify please Michelle Obama's husband not gay that guy thanks for thanks for clearing that up if you found the best hiding spot you haven't found the best hiding spot okay biologists are just a bunch of cells that talk about other cells and what about it you got a problem bud bumble bees can fly higher than Mount Everest because Mount Everest can't fly hey no one's challenging it what do you believe to be 100% bull crap oh the Bronx that comes out of a Bulls blood of course where's my gold reddit where's my gold to the man in the wheelchair who stole my camo jacket you can hide but you can't run and you can't cover that wheelchair in the jacket either he'll be found lickety-split if we can't we won't thank stires appreciate that man finally an honest company - an honest work how come y'all be in Miami and etc for y'all's birthdays but your kids parties are always at chuck-e-cheeses cuz my four-year-old don't like strippers and coke that's easy I'm very quick at math oh okay so what's 12 times 9 56 that's not even close who said I was correct I said him quick he got you an air he got you there idiot I never watched friends seems like a terrible TV show if she randomly goes cold on you it's because her ex is back in our life true or nah well it's either that if she's dead oh I usually sit on the computer for 12 hours a day is that bad that can't be comfortable try a chair okay listen pal there's three unwritten rules of dating and there they are you want to see them that's them Trump is the first leader in the history of the world to be attacked for improving the lives of the citizens that voted for him Lincoln was literally shot in the head for ending slavery well to be fair slaves didn't vote for Lincoln damn checkmate I do intend to write what's your favorite kind of soup chicken and vegetable a fine choice why thank you what an odd first question though you can tell a lot about somebody by their favorite soup what can you tell about me you like chicken and vegetable soup damn Connor damn Connor read her like a book you're cute what's the catch wow what a healthy attitude towards women there it is they're straight up a red flag in the upper right corner you knew was a mistake a belly button is basically a scar from you got into a knife fight with a guy in a mask after being evicted from your first place no it's not it's not it at all if you're a male your wieners bigger than forty nine point six percent of the population no matter what feel better about yourself fellas looking out for you what does your diet consist of now you know the usual food well here I was assuming that you photosynthesize like the rest of us normal people food goddamn my dog just completed her fourth orbit around the Sun very special moment right here dang how much is that in dog use Wow like at least three new skeleton found in Pompeii this guy was running from the eruption when a 300 kilogram Boulder hit him right in the face jail was he okay obviously not what do you think was the last thing that went through his head well easily a big freaking rock how to hide your weed there's your weed hidden in a mountain of cocaine you're welcome yo my friend got a degree in Egyptology but he can't get a job so he's paying more money to get a PhD so he can work teaching other people Egyptology in his case college is literally a pyramid scheme ah see there is no escape therapist what brings you here he takes everything too literally in you the bus guy my wife is mad that I keep introducing her as my ex-girlfriend well after my wedding I started introducing my wife as my first wife technically the truth but not appreciated they just don't understand me humor fellas keep your heads up Kings I'll boo VV you did you know a propeller is just a big fan in front of the plane to keep the pilot cool when it stomps you can actually see the pilot start sweating yeah is that so my kids are unvaccinated what essential oils can I use to prevent them from catching measles don't use essential oils use large amounts of fermented Swedish herring smeared liberally all over their bodies several cans a day that should keep all other human beings far enough away from them that they're not likely to catch measles as a couple of commenters have already pointed out this is also highly effective at preventing teenage pregnancy you're welcome oh god dude surstromming is disgusting I'm sure I didn't say it right butts gross the first guy to do a backflip was probably like you know what I think you're right on that man is for followers a lot depends on the context in Instagram not all in a dark alley yes a lot hey folks it's question of the day food for thought our mashed potatoes just Irish guacamole I don't know don't tell anyone yet but I found a way for infinite power maybe we could use it at Mars you know what kind of outlet is that it's electrical smartass girls leave they dog in a cage 14 hours a day me like I'm a dog mom to a fur baby nah ho you awarding to a prisoner so I gotta let that prisoner free computers in the future may weigh no more than 1.5 tons well hey you're not wrong but god you're not right either good romance starts with a good friendship but a bad romance starts with rah rah ah roma-roma-ma gaga ooh la la if you think I'm ever gonna sing that you're you're mistaken I'm never gonna do it I'll always read it as bland and dry as possible baby that's just how I roll what a gay shop owner declines service to someone because they're straight no because gay people aren't freakin a-holes well technically metaphorically no they aren't but like physically girls are hot guys are hot why is everyone so hot no global warming thanks professor whales have existed for at least one year lower your child's risk of overdosing by building up their heroin tolerance hey not a problem Melissa Derek time to juice up baby I want you to grow up big and strong your house is burning down you can only save one thing what do you save my house isn't it obvious you idiot I wasn't hurt that badly the doctor said all my bleeding was internal and that's where Bloods supposed to be looking at the bright side aren't you why do you carry your ID with you it defines Who I am hey the kids not wrong the first guy with insomnia was probably like but seems I can no longer sleep spread the word of Islam if yeah I guess it's all right pay up I did it how did you join reddit that's easy I made an account jujitsu the gentle art of folding clothes while people are still in them involuntary yoga leaked image from the sit of the new avatar movie well hey they're not wrong it's all CGI maybe is his life worth less than mine it is his life worth more than mine now you're all equally worthless kids now 50 pushups the world's fastest growing plant is the giant water lily which grows almost a foot a day um lily pads can't grow feet I'd love to watch one grow that I wonder if there's a time lapse somewhere guess we'll never throw an unsecured bottle of Parmesan cheese into the laptop bag ever again why would you do that in the first place because you took mac and cheese to a different level my friend by being stupid mama is this safe to eat no it's for storing valuable objects yeah you're not my kid apparently Mac supports Windows would you look at that looks like the can coexist I love it most people think that t-rexes can't clap because they have short arms but really it's because they're dead oh well okay it's raining back in the Amazon Mother Earth said screw you bros I'll just do it myself well maybe if the stupid tree stopped producing oxygen there'd be no fire okay fair enough a new toothpaste is released in dentists all bought water like hey that's great ones just like I've inquired as the ys na s titles aren't available for the 3ds in nintendo only sent me this image in response honestly I'd take the L and leave that's a great response the only open mind and presidents we've ever had yeah that's one way to say it I don't see why people prefer pcs of a consuls haters always say consuls are limited but my n64 can support Apple products and windows get bent people actually think the earth is flat son round moon round stars round but the earth is flying through space like a freakin frisbee dude stars are star-shaped not round read a book photoshop requests can someone make it look like I'm holding a pitbull this is amazing please note the post-apocalyptic afflictions section has been moved to current affairs hey wait really blueberry mac and cheese is a real thing yeah and so are the police which I'll call if you have opposed to blueberry mac and cheese again can you guys please recommend books that made you cry Organic Chemistry structure and function by volpehart K Peter C and score Neil E I don't get the joke like a book on how things crowd get it record-breaking performance as soon as I saw the video like thumbnail I knew exactly what the joke was gonna be go ahead and break the shutter the record baby show me what you got yeah if we all started referring to water like this vaccine for dehydration the anti vaccine Menace would be over in three days remember kids if you don't sin then Jesus died for nothing so get out then commit a few atrocities when you're running low on space but your pup gives your computer a megabyte Oh how to draw a sheep draw a cloud legs a circle for the head and there you have it a sheep someone draws sheep using these instructions hey this really helped this is the best shape I've ever drawn friends are like bananas if you peel there's gonna eat them V die math test this theory out who wants to who was the volunteer what is the least spoken language in the world sign language fair enough someone please quickly explain baby clothing sizes to me we'll see baby clothes are smaller than most adult or even children's clothes I hope that helps thanks dad preciate you man how to speak nine languages step one speak eight step two and one which is the hardest step good question my guy hathir was the Egyptian goddess of fertility and variety and music so sex drugs and rock and roll and a manner of speaking yes love it the first guys to across the river was probably like looks about right to me chief give or take a couple more steps colossus of the alps and that's a cool painting that's super dope I wonder what killed it a sword obviously I see your intellectual maybe the sword is merely a knife in the hand of a giant much larger than the Colossus tell me something I don't know well there's an apostrophe between the N and T and don't you [ __ ] you fool titanium blades they cut through diamonds I'm not wearing any diamonds but I am in superhero movie if a toy and Toy Story dies the kid wouldn't know in the Oh toys would have to watch and play with the corpse that's pretty morbid that's pretty morbid dude you're trapped in a haunted house what do you do to survive I leave okay what's your type type of what blood Oh Oh red new player name unavailable create that names unavailable and that brings us to the end of our slash technically the truth and if you liked the video do us a favor and leave a like and subscribe for more content from MK and as always I'll be seeing ya see ya [Music]

Channel: EmKay

Views: 4,838,913

Rating: 4.8994312 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, subreddit, best of reddit, r/ top posts, top posts, top posts of all time, reddit top posts, 100% True stories, reddit true stories, top all time, reddit posts, r/technicallythetruth, r/technicallythetruth best posts, r/technicallythetruth top posts, technically the truth, reddit technically the truth, reddit truth, truth, technically the truth emkay, r/technicallythetruth emkay, reddit funny, emkay

Id: P07TfQGdUi8

Length: 14min 8sec (848 seconds)

Published: Wed Sep 11 2019