If Soda Commercials Were Honest - Honest Ads (Coca-cola, Pepsi, Dr. Pepper Parody)

hot out need to cool down instead of water might i suggest an ice cold bottle of candy we added some water and bubbles to it so you can pretend it's a drink it's not it's basically syrup but my competitors and i have spent decades and billions of dollars to slowly make the general public associate our product with fun happiness togetherness and in some cases entire holidays which thankfully happen regularly forever point is you're probably already on board with the idea of consuming wet sugar with bubbles in it so i'm not going to spend any more money on this nor am i going to pay a celebrity millions of dollars to tell you to drink wet sugar with bubbles in it i don't need to you love it hi i'm some guy named roger and if it's hot out or you like having friends or some other virtually universal aspect of life i think you should buy some horton brand effervescent liquid candy but more importantly buy some for your kids of course if your child goes to public school we have huge steaks in their lunch programs so we'll just sell it to them directly and cut you entirely out of the equation you can even put money in a glass box and get a wide variety of flavors caramel dye if you knew how much sugar a human is supposed to consume in a day very little and how much sugar is in one bottle of wet sugar lots you probably wouldn't drink it and we want you to drink it so we bullied the fda into letting us straight up not give you that information but if you're really concerned we can put the word diet somewhere on the can and replace the piles of natural sugar with chemicals that are so incompatible with human biology that our bodies don't even metabolize them that's going to slide right through me luckily we're pretty sure these chemicals don't cause any lasting damage well except bladder cancer in laboratory animals and other kinds of cancer and other laboratory animals but you're a human so fuck it ah sweet sweet acid yes acid is the right word if i pour a bottle of cool refreshing sugary acid onto a car it will literally strip away the paint but we don't pour it on cars we pour it in our mouths past our teeth into our tummies and you'll pay more money than you should for it even though it costs almost nothing to produce the container actually is the most expensive part uh could you save that for me awful lot of water went into making that i'm roger buy some can i get my stomach pumped hey guys thanks for watching if you enjoyed us you know put some comments down at the bottom oh how about this what kind of soda do you think we use during this you put your comments down there bridgette will collect them clean them up send me the best ones by one o'clock thanks again guys

Channel: Cracked

Views: 4,835,672

Rating: 4.9209242 out of 5

Keywords: Honest Ads, Honest Commercials, Honest Trailers, Coca-Cola, Diet Coke, Pepsi, Dr. Pepper, advertisements, cracked.com, cracked, sketch, comedy, funny, spoof, humor, diet, obese, cola, soda, pop

Id: pMXwFlp9IoI

Length: 3min 50sec (230 seconds)

Published: Mon Feb 01 2016

Reddit Comments

[u/cleepboywonder]

They forgot to note that the companies use water from poor regions to manufacture their product.

[u/horja_mekan]

There’s a whole series of these. Probably the best thing cracked.com has produced