If Fast Food Commercials Were Honest - Honest Ads (McDonald's, Burger King, Wendy's, Taco Bell)

hello there hi my name's Roger and I'd love to tell you all about my new restaurant that brings you cooked food alarmingly quickly I promise to make this quick as well because I know that you are statistically speaking an exhausted parent or a struggling college student or someone else with neither time nor money money that you're still going to spend hi hi folks did you know that your brain can be addicted to not just drugs and alcohol but to anything from exercise to people to shopping we do and we picked food as the addiction we'd like to sell to you that's why our meals are designed to be the perfect combination of fat sugar and the only rock that tastes good thanks to the human body's natural reward system and the fact that sugar can be more addictive than cocaine our food is too tasty to resist literally your brain will regularly crave one of our burgers burgers just like well not this one that's not at all representative of the muscle and fat we actually sell for this one we had a team of food stylists and image specialists worked for several hours the muscle and fat sandwiches we sell are made by a 14 year old in about one minute but it sure does taste good enough until you want another one do you see this nugget it starts as the whipped up muscles of chickens and then we form it into a zigzag or some nonsense it's not good for you but we'll give you ten for three dollars so frankly it's sort of irresponsible of you not to buy this offering our food at impossibly low prices is another one of the ways we hope people especially and ideally people in low-income areas do you like plastic shapes your children do we've decided to include free painted plastic shapes and all our children's meals so your kids will grow to associate our brand with reward and Happiness before you know it they'll be literally screaming for you to take them here and once you do you can just send them to the temporary kids ooh and enjoy your fat sugar and salt sandwich in peace our temporary kids ooh contains a pit and a slide both perfect for creating the illusion of physical activity well really just letting gravity do the playing for you it's also a cheap fast easy way to hook them early so they'll develop fond memories of the restaurant to follow them as they grow up isn't that right can I work here you sure can and in just seven months you'll have made what I make in just an hour anyway I've been Roger still and I hope you come on down to the fast food ray where the colors yellow and red have been known to subconsciously trigger hunger so frankly it's sort of irresponsible irresponsible irresponsible of you irresponsible of you not to buy this

Channel: Cracked

Views: 4,396,625

Rating: 4.918788 out of 5

Keywords: Fast Food (Cuisine), Food (TV Genre), McDonalds, Burger King, Wendys, In and Out, Fast Food Restaurant (Literature Subject), Hamburgers, addiction, food addiction, sugar addiction, commercials, Chicken Nugget (Food), fast food commercials, cracked, cracked.com, funny, spoof, humor, parody, comedy, happy meal, Satire (TV Genre), Taco Bell, Honest Ads, McDonald's, Wendy's, ads, honest commercials, honest ads

Id: -q78QXpSL2M

Length: 3min 41sec (221 seconds)

Published: Mon Jun 29 2015

Reddit Comments

[u/whatwhatdb]

10 nuggets for $3?

Pshhh. Burger King sells 10 nuggets for $1.

edit: $1.49, not $1, as xetanees pointed out.

[u/[deleted]]

This video is really 2 minutes longer than it needs to be to preserve the joke.

[u/psyghamn]

Paunch Burger

[u/meeseeksanddestroy]

This is pretty stupid. I get what they were trying to do. Gross me out by using words like "muscle" and "paste," but that doesn't really mean anything. The steak I get at a high end place is also a "muscle" and the butter I put on my bread is just "fat."

[u/[deleted]]

Fast food restaurants sell exactly what we want them too. If McDonald cut down on their fat content your actual real world reaction would be "Want to go to Taco Bell?".

I have never understood why fast food restaurants are so commonly thought of as evil. They sell things we all want. In order to enjoy the freedom to make choices, we must accept that some people will make bad choices. And I think most all of us understand that eating nothing but fast food all day every day is a poor choice. Even if you don't, a single google search would clear it up.

[u/Pijan_the_drunk]

what happened to you cracked....

[u/DoomDash]

Everything is fine in moderation. Also making things tasty isn't really some conspiracy.

[u/goal2004]

Fat, sugar and salt sandwich? Really? Show me one sandwich that isn't always a combination of those in one way or another, and I'll show you something that isn't a fucking sandwich.

[u/killzon32]

All I can think of when people talk about eating healthy