r/Onejob | Mark with a C

upon arriving to help get my keys out of my car the Triple A guy locked his keys in his car and had to call triple-a just a normal day on the job for Triple A [Music] what's up guys and welcome back to ma my name is Damian today we're looking through our /one job we have now 22 and 25th those are the right dates don't say anything wrong with that one chief boy 11 pinned down and had bleach poured in his eyes by other skilled children it's poor with confidence Clorox no that's not where you should advertise you know I go to the store and where I get my baby needs is the same place I get my beers and wines cuz parenting needs a drink and a half go ahead and check my battery Amit uh oh yeah okay so I think I should be good might be a full charge when did Rome become an empire did you mean when did Rome became an empire now Google no I didn't mean that oh that one's just infuriating it's a it's literally in the scent think of it's right there again this was just a little funny though I'm not gonna lie the Queen had a spell now her top is all sideways Carlo go universal type good feeling excellent function built heat-resistant ceramics protector national flat oh I see I said my name was mark with a C karke yeah yeah we got a coffee here for karke [ __ ] mark what I see [ __ ] come get your coffee five six seven nine nine you messed up eight stupid we got a video I love when I get these all right I'm in speeding through wait wait wait no no okay that's not gonna work out but on there we go oh my god diploma do not bend well you should have made the font bigger because he didn't read a single word Clifford the Big Red Dog he knows a lot about divorce dating and sex after 45 and he won't spare you the gory details another video let's see what's going on here it dropped in the trash like a normal human should uh well come on now come on now that's just bad design too cool to do drugs cool to do drugs do drugs drugs retool pencils from a 90's anti-drug campaign well I could see why they will recall it seems like they want you to do some drugs second plot to the epic fail yeah there's no stairs they're missing stairs boss but Darth Maul mask alright notice of the DIY Oh extinct birds bird extinction status not extinct okay alright so something good is going on that's some good news today was so happy to finally get a 55 inch 4k TV open the box plugged it in and turn it on just to see this thanks FedEx oh my heart oh my god that is terrible yo oh no man we have the first floor the fourth store the fifth floor and the sixth floor some beautiful selections all the fisty hey honey I got this new jacket well you know what the Savior tried it time to try them on in the fisting rooms what do you guys say about this dick Smith it floats on water well I trust that smile what do you got a show okay alright so you lied to us dick Smith you dick my school's new security game it's gonna stop anyone and everyone from even touching that building oh I see well that is not a drink I'd like to have a hamburger is one dollar but you're selling it to four to 250 there's the handicap ramp good luck you get a get a frickin sick poop you gotta jump up through a ring of fire and we're gonna clap it say ten points men without hats men without hats performing in 2011 who's this bozo onstage with a hat Canada United States Mexico Brazil Africa Russia okay right looks good looks good but what about this part here where you have Africa twice and Japan's right there Germany shouldn't be there okay so you got a long listen if this is for a test you failed my favorite color is Hitler oh this is just beautiful hitman in theatres November 21st Huggies kids like Oh Pooh Bear no someone unzip the bag now unzip the bag are you kidding me no I like are you genuinely kidding me is this real you had one job at Xbox one is that what is that not an Xbox is that a ps4 we got this shoe and my little brother was born s MH July 1st 21:03 well one day that's gonna be a real shoe that a baby can wear ok need quick cash just find an ATM with the keys still labelled and taped to the back oh my God why important keys for armored carrier only if you have questions call phone number kids and tears as cinema shows horror film instead of detective Pikachu love it the lamps in my uni classroom it's almost impossible to focus on the lecture yo why would you do that it's all disorientating I'll blame you and that's a big long chalkboard too and that lager door is higher than the rest of them oh this is a mess therapist long bread isn't real it can't hurt you long the bread I love my jokes that's for big long sub sandwiches though that you don't want to use sub buns for I like it what is the Mariana Trench Mariana Trench the hypothalamus plays a major role in the regulation of basic biological drives related to survival including the so called four FS fighting fleeing feeding and mating this line in my textbook makes it almost worth the 160 dollars I spent on it 1700 days ago the message failed the sin would you like to try again no freakin way this actually happened to me oh my god nice that's Wow go ahead type it in scope it if you're white you bandit don't be silly wrap your willy take one for free I don't think I want any of those chief Department of Planning you sure yeah positive failure to print document print is not supported on this printer well brick pull-push yeah well which one is it who on earth accepted this is a return this item is from the summer of 2000 that was almost 17 years ago our return policy is 45 days if you're not sure ask and you know what that's fair on the road to success there are no shortcuts well good luck Tribe Judy's gonna shave a little off the top and because I love it just shaving a little off the top is I go through these bridge don't save a life be afraid to give blood Thanks gods easily just take the Photoshop tool and rotate that piece a little bit and we got it fixed okay this is not a joke we paid a photographer who claim to be a professional two hundred and fifty dollars for a family photo shoot please see these for real photo she delivered to us she said the shadows were really bad on this beautiful clear sunny day and that her professor never taught her to retouch photos feel free to share I literally have not laughed this hard any years you can't make this stuff up again this is not a joke final product and let's see this what's oh I'd say it's a normal family oh my god oh I don't like that they look like flash game characters signals that baffled astronomers for 17 years traced to observatories microwave oven Oh for it's torn Row is 94 occupation dog handler of Adolf Hitler known for killing Hilton dogs oh the spilling beef what you get what place on the spilling beef let's see chocolate is now 87 cents we got all mojo spoon I'll eat more butter ringers some some wonder bars some singers scores crunchies and I really don't want to say that one for Snickers cuz I know how close it sounds to that other word and I don't want to do it square root 3 square round half round oh that's that is some illusion 100 they're all they're all more than the other way but you were pointing that way where do I go no use of tape or thumbtacks are permitted on walls use of them may be cause to lose security deposit you know sort about those four tacks on the wall forgive me but is that a TV that no clipped inside the wall you might want to restart your game buddy build a burger where we start with those are chips area you put that away right now Ariel that is very inappropriate see some Neapolitan ice cream yummy yummy yummy where's my vanilla one second vid it's two seconds great view of the game bud love it breaking news many words should fit on this sentence bar do not try to type in a paragraph to tell story don't laugh pets too and pet sematary which one do you want to see and that brings us to the end of our slash one job it for my first time scrolling through the subreddit I had a blast and a good little chuckle you know and if you liked the video leave a link down below and I want to try something a little fun actually comment down below sub reddits that you haven't seen cover that you would want to see talked about some little goofy something a little funny okay I see a lot of you say hey you should do no sleep I'm gonna read those scary stories bub I got a small heart I'm not Courage the Cowardly Dog I can't do that and as always I'll be seeing you [Music]

Channel: EmKay

Views: 2,567,851

Rating: 4.9395118 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, subreddit, best of reddit, r/ top posts, top posts, top posts of all time, reddit top posts, 100% True stories, reddit true stories, top all time, reddit posts, sorrow tv, rslash, giofilms, r/onejob, r/onejob top posts, r/onejob best posts, one job, one job reddit, reddit r/onejob, emkay r/onejob, emkay

Id: C7X3B2tkH2Y

Length: 10min 21sec (621 seconds)

Published: Tue Jun 25 2019