r/Facepalm | nice fix bruh

check it out baby perfectly cooked rare chicken steak Salmonella never heard of it [Music] what's up guys and welcome back to MA my name is Damon and today looking through our slash facepalm M&S the all-day breakfast is searched 11:30 a.m. hey chief where does all day mean to you because that's not all day breakfast G if I'm gonna be completely honest Oh oh god that is danger waiting to happen oh you need to just you need to like put a sapper on that or something keep their hand off of it they're gonna fall like a pile of dominoes one star I haven't eaten there yet so you know no no hey it's an Australian get it I am addicted to the family tree app I was able to follow my directive submit land back 102 generations all the way to Adam and Eve I also found my ancestors correlation to Jesus yeah have you have you [ __ ] you know and that may actually knew there was difference between then and then always thought people just use them when you one of the sentence to look American or something nah nah nods when they're American imagine writing a paper honey and these people to look more American and here's the curve the American then it reeks of freedom here at Saratoga Springs we have some pretty cool people we would like to thank Associates name thanks for doing such a great job associates name we appreciate you yeah which one would your so [ __ ] make you pick a hole puts camera on top of hemp shawl from 8th to 9th century oh whoa first of all what is a shawl second of all why would you place your camera on something from the 8th century in the first place that just seems like you know damage waiting to happen oh good move idiot nice the baby changing area keep it right next to the designated smoking area just in case anyone gets it mixed up well then don't take your kids to an r-rated movie listen it's very inappropriate for kids I took my kids to go see this movie and I had to walk out 1 hour in after paying $50 on tickets and snacks I thought this is gonna be a movie with Batman but this has nothing to do with Batman the theater didn't give me a wreath I'm not going to take my kids back in to finish it do not watch this with your kids I'm disappointed in DC for allowing such a movie to be made it was rated R what do you think R stands for you [ __ ] restricted you dunce much like your brain activity is restricted Hey look name address I don't need none of that but what's listen well sorry I miss you yeah items in in your safe place at the black bin yeah but where is it how am I supposed to know my supposed to know shower thoughts your birthday isn't your actual day of birth it's the day in which you left the womb which is when you were birthed you shouldn't be allowed to use the subreddit chief hey you didn't cut my chicken did you oh my god send photos it didn't cut properly there's bones for some reason it's a freaking roast chicken of course there's bones I'm sorry I'm so sorry boomers I got my mom on the way to the store and handed her a reusable bag this is what she returned with I just put them all in the big bag I could break into my own building by just pushing hard enough yeah go ahead and push as hard as you can show me what you got there you go bro variety no alarm set off real cheap and easy jig will stand for rivers is a113 and then we got the Brentwood television hatch industrial states secret nuclear bunker you know normal stuff hi I'm 18 t's automated virtual assistant how can I help you today cancel my account we're sorry the session has ended you the network issues please try again later tobias every time woman keys up tesla and gets caught by its nine built-in cameras oh you [ __ ] nine built-in cameras that's nine angles in which you're being shown how dumb you are I love it reviews for chocolate banana bread most hopeless if I want banana bread I don't really want a chocolate taste with it too bad I didn't realize that before I spent the time to make this bread man if only it told us in like the title or something that it's chocolate banana bread turning the passenger airbag into a claymore mine using a coin collection Oh oh sweet lord doesn't look safe at all whitey questioning her she knows exactly what she's doing she's a professional look at those eyes I trust her with anything with my car anything mechanical I trusted with my life clickbait game devs literally screen record an ad from another clickbait game why spend the time to make your own ad when you can rip someone else's ad it says the clickbait gamedev dude I can get some juicy dude it's only 324 TM man spoiling me today Mike you be my computer after I let my friend borrow it Oh how does this happen yeah you should you borrow my computer hi how do you return it with its face like scalped essentially like how did this happen people also ask how many days is 24 hours Basic Education whoa ah yes my favorite dead meat video we're coming for you James a Jenice speaking of which I love that guy I love James I love dead meat it's a fantastic YouTube channel if you love horror movies and you know they're the kills in horror movies it's a good channel I love what they do love you James if you actually read and understand this message you are more fortunate than three billion people in the world who are blind deaf or illiterate what is reading and understanding they do with death they can teach themselves how to read it's okay any the Deaf one is the that doesn't make me sorry ah yes the extreme version of the ramp it only goes down going up requires the most serious arm strength you can never possess Florida man kidnap scientists to make his dog immortal and you know what that's not even a crime that's just him looking out for his best friend one star never been to this theater don't firstly ever go under to this theater drove by it several times once doc you know I I've always wondered when people leave one serve used to places we've never been do they realize that hurts the business or are they just like blissfully unaware is it like a chaotic neutral or a chaotic evil elderly woman mistakenly praised a league of Legends character why is it like that giant sighs oh that's kind of cool or is that not even the League of Legends player and I just think that's neat from behavioral health education services Justin has an appointment with dr. Marshall on Monday October 7th at 12:45 p.m. required a confirmed date and time OB people for Justin this is not an automated message should we consider this kid Justin really peepee poo-poo that's what you want to say Justin should we consider this a confirmation for said date and time oh my god I'm so sorry yes tomorrow 12:45 works fine people failed to print document printing is not supported on this printer what why even get the printer what is it good the point is just an expensive paperweight my $5,000 oscilloscope can't connect to the network because a Wi-Fi enabled light bulb stole its fixed IP address the future is frickin stupid listen man my old clock didn't works like tapes of a working clock on top of my non-working clock from what age can babies fly 10,000 points for that good Lord people are dumb hey a copper hexagon wire shelf but that's a octagon keeping all the dirt strapped down chief it's not going anywhere huh dude the hala gate it's my favorite I love me a hala gate so I keep myself safe in the VR realm with a hala gate homeless man under house arrest well that's just mean these for you to go at that point there's no home honey barbecue chicken strips no it's not what they are can't tell me there's a chicken you cannot tell me in confidence that those are chicken strips you can't tell me in good faith that that's chicken strips oh you had an idiot make your enjoy eating ink Hey Oh see if you can guess that Disney movie based on just do if it's characters not this one though it's easy it stars in Japan's new 500 yen design completely fake unfortunately they're 500 yen's of coin Oh sucks it's really really cute laughing cow cheese huh I bet that cow wasn't laughing when you slaughtered it huh you don't kill academic cheese but still I met a guy last night and he said he works for Amazon uh my dumb self was all like oh my god I used Amazon Prime all the time then he said actually the rainforest I have koalas on my house right now because of the fire sorry that's not correct the correct answer is long equation your answer the same exact equation hey Liam guess what buddy it's not a real name as far as we're concerned a hundred and one genius life hacks that will save your money stabbing a knife directly through your phone I'm talking like psycho Alfred Hitchcock knife-like just straight destruct Joe England is in London isn't it you mean London is in England no then no England is not in London England as a country in London is a city no cuz everyone from England is also from London but everyone in London is from England because London is a city you you shouldn't be allowed to make like important decisions in life is the moon a star no is the moon a planet no is the moon Hollow no is the moon bigger than the earth no is the moon made of cheese no is the moon full tonight maybe it's the only one that's plausible the mammal brain versus the human brain okay so I'm still wait hold on all right no yeah I'm maybe I'm just stupid the man was a humans chief this makes no sense man sues Apple because his iPhone quote turned him gay he's now in a steady relationship with a man and can't control his gay thoughts a man in Russia has launched a lawsuit against Apple after he alleged his phone turned him gay iOS 13 is full of Wonders my friend watermelons nah fan knows some weird-looking watermelons they ain't ripe yet they ain't ripe at all Alabama woman Coast Sheriff office to test her meth deputies saying she has no concern at all look at her she's so nonchalant this is not our first mug shot she's been through the wringer she's like I am just par leave it hello blink as when I asked a question why using my name is your account name because it's my name it's not exclusive to you do follow us to quality parking yeah I think it's quality chief how do you say pizzas based pizzas owned sometimes the minimum kind of guy first night in the new house that my wife cooks a plastic bag on the brand-new stove thanks honey someone get a putty knife and I'll scrape it off or a straightedge razor or something Iraqi Prime Minister is speaking to his people via Facebook the only problem Facebook has an abandoned Iraq by order of the Prime Minister himself good going you big [ __ ] thuds dull idiot yeah you know I kid I kid you only half a dolt Dunston what I gamma I already forgot what I told them it's one of them one of them days baby still dumb I don't believe that one single vac sown is bad I believe 128 vaccine by age 12 is bad based on based on we've akan arrow or than any other country in the world and we are slowly declining on our life expectancy in the United States where are you getting 128 everything I read is 70 doses of 16 vaccines over 18 years you know it's worse than 70 doses polio polio hasn't been a factor in 60 years at least yeah why is that now go ahead I'll wait for you to tell me when nothing goes right go left road closed turn left okay trying to maybe using C to hide its submarines well how else how else would it be hiding I ask you this newspaper headline the submarine is to the sea with the airplane is to the sky stealth is not necessarily what it's looking for sentence reduced for man who set partner alight I'm sorry domestic violence shine a light Ike's oh-yo leg days best day really that's funny because I won the powerlifting squad competition two years in a row the second 24 year-old diver squat over 500 Wow I see he's making a what legs joke cuz he's wearing camo and this dude took it really personally Wow what a sad man using picture from Assassin's creating your story about Syria Danish mania nice good going you fool Pat yourselves on the back and never go back on at least for a week take it take a break a group of teens trying to catch a man he's suspected of preying on minors then he kidnapped one of them police say he's a you want want to try and catch me I'll catch you now outrageous billboard for terminator film is erected outside abortion clinic it's just sad this that's just bad placement that's unfortunate placement all right show me what you got baby what you're doing you go oh yeah there he goes as soon as the song it calls them again now there's no way this is gonna end in a in a non you know soaked way it's a shame buddy I have like no sympathy for him I'm so jaded and before we in this video of course it is time to feature a post of our /mk by user monkey beans YT fan art he's fabulous drew this two days ago and had no clue how to send it to Damien but I'll be making more in the future woo I'll pray to be noticed by senpai oh whoa okay alright I Shh I shall eat your babies also I'm strangely aroused right now I mean I would be two of them wearing heart boxers I don't own a pair of hot boxes but uh honestly when you wearing hardball who knows what happens i had pre [ __ ] the art thank you so much and that brings us to the end of our slash facepalm and if you liked the video leave a like down below and subscribe for more content from MK and as always I'll be seeing ya [Music]

Channel: EmKay

Views: 2,043,564

Keywords: reddit, r/, subreddit, best of reddit, r/ top posts, top posts, top posts of all time, reddit top posts, 100% True stories, reddit true stories, top all time, reddit posts, r/facepalm, r/facepalm top posts, r/facepalm best posts, there was an attempt, reddit fail, reddit facepalm, r/therewasanattempt, there was an attempt best posts, r/therewasanattempt top posts, r/therewasanattempt best posts, epic fail, r/facepalm emkay, facepalm emkay, reddit funny, falling, emkay

Id: i64YZ5WC7gs

Length: 13min 40sec (820 seconds)

Published: Tue Oct 15 2019