r/Technicallythetruth | makin chess moves

mulan has the highest kill count of any disney character i don't know man thanos killed half of the universe oh my god with your stupid technicalities ones like this piss me off just because disney paid billions of dollars to buy out marvel doesn't mean i'm going to recognize thanos as a disney character all right now shut up and go watch mulan again the old one not the new crappy one that removed all the music [Music] how's it going ladies and gentlemen welcome back to mk i'm your host robin and today we're going to be taking another look at r technically the truth where the best kind of truth reigns supreme south african man arrested for eating at kfc free for a year by saying head office sent him to taste if they are up to standard free him how in the hell do you get dick from richard you ask him nicely i need ibuprofen after this same man it's too early for this crap teacher the naked eye can't see a single atom me who can see 10 billion atoms at once ah there's the signature look of superiority hello sun bro hello earth bro close your eyes bro okay bro what did you see bro darkness bro that's my world without you bro bro wow that was absolutely terrible i don't think i've ever said the word bro so many times in my life if you're angry do not calm down calm up instead more calm equals less anger it's simple really finally someone cracked a code people not from canada how do you see the average canadian well by traveling to canada technically the truth will always be full of plenty of good dad jokes the four horsemen of chess hold on i need a drink for this this is ah yeah yeah yeah don't worry it's water okay we can move on now it is 100 seconds to midnight scientists think we're closer to the end of the world than ever well scientists are pretty much 100 correct on that i hate the doomsday clock so much because it always moves forward i can't wait for when i'm 55 and it's like two seconds to midnight it's gonna be awesome your heartbeat is probably perfectly synchronized with someone else's especially if you're dead oh you should show me my options for desert dessert oh sand dunes which do you prefer is that an old messed up star wars set okay i like that thank goodness we can't actually do this in the game though that would be monstrously horrible look i'm just saying your favorite server would suddenly stop working right because 500 people that are playing on it want to make 10 billion diamonds an hour almost every hand you've ever shaken has had a penis in it yeah that's true that doesn't bug me though when you die in canada you die in real life okay that's not true that's just the anti-tourism coalition in canada trying to get you not to go visit alright it's perfectly safe you can't die there i would die if a guy did this to me that's right sweaty in high school our gym teacher asked us who we thought the smartest teacher in the school was we guessed the ap chem teacher the precalc teacher the ap physics teacher etc he goes nope it's me because i get paid the same as those guys and i play dodgeball all day he is very very right those that can't do teach those that can't teach teach gym always remember that school of rock had plenty of wisdom for us if this is a pair of scissors then what the heck is this hmm a duel you're not wrong yeah it's a duel 15 in spanish here you go 15. gee google thank you so much never misses a gay event yeah they never do do they god screw those freaks we're gonna need our glasses to watch the news babe all right i'll get em much better cheers [Laughter] maybe just don't watch the news seriously just don't watch the news stop watching the news why would you want something that's built to scare you day in and day out when you've got mk right here the four horsemen of news headlines world bank says poor need more money rich nations called to task for crisis diana was still alive hours before she died federal agents raid gun shop find weapons planes forced to land at airports what do people do in the shower for 45 minutes i just sat in the shower for an hour thinking about how mercedes has three e's all pronounced differently how much does a good telescope cost 2.5 billion dollars ah yes the hubble because that's what i'm looking for to start my stargazing hobby do men still open car doors how the hell do you think we get inside i mean i don't know about you but i usually just bust the driver window open it's very expensive because i have to replace it like five times a week but honestly i look good doing it memes are now statistically more popular than jesus christ every day we stray farther from god no we're not straying further we're just flexing on him when your friend gets a second job you had one job and now he's got two florida man tells neighbors he's going to kill them with kindness then tries to kill them with a machete he named kindness well that's an accurate statement he warned them if you put a pizza on top of a pizza you have two pizzas but if you stack two lasagnas then you still have one lasagna yeah just a vastly superior lasagna not sure why society hates lazy people i mean we didn't even do anything oh nice one i got us a couch really wait you mean a couch no i'm leaving you that is a perfectly valid response think about date slash movie night with your significant other on that bad boy netflix and chill no no never let anyone tell you what you can or cannot do just look at beethoven everyone told him he would never be a musician just because he was deaf but did he listen i mean i don't know what's the closest thing to real magic fake magic that's true yep okay mood it probably did oh you son of a [ __ ] kyle i can move diagonally on this floor i would love to organize a giant game of chess using real people it would be highly impractical and it totally wouldn't work at all but i'd love to see it anyway not to sound politically unaware but did you guys know fox news has absolutely no news about foxes same with bbc news wait owning a camera doesn't make you a paragraph i guess you're correct i mean i can't argue with that statement whatsoever and wow look how popular that post is god hello hi send me pig all right there you go i mean your pigs okay here's some more no man your full body pig okay here you go geez i'm not a vegetarian because i love animals i'm a vegetarian because i hate plants you know honestly same they just sit there looking all smug did you know the pool on the titanic is still filled and not for much longer that thing's gonna be gone soon entirely in the end the earth always wins he stared at her with what was probably a normal amount of eyes probably though just probably don't believe the hype all-purpose flour does not work well in coffee god i don't know why that one upsets me more than the rest what i have told you you read the title wrong well you wrote it wrong that's fair also i didn't read it wrong suck it find the person who doesn't pay taxes can't find them it's because they're right here fact babies are idiot leeches and don't freaking pay taxes they've never paid their fair share alright and it's time to put our foots down submarine racing championship i can totally imagine this being on the discovery channel or something edited just like kitchen nightmares but it's the same god damn three shots of the ocean over and over and over again with zoom cuts and smash edits glass coffins will they be popular remains to be seen not really i mean you're still six feet under the dirt no one brits i'm confused i'm not a big history buff i'm not very smart either so hey in the comments if you feel like explaining it to me because i'm dumb i'm not gonna stop you everything you need to know about russia russia is bigger than most small cars the term mother russia refers to a gigantic 70-foot woman who protects siberia to walk from one side of russia to the other takes too long the best way to get to russia is to travel if you put russia on top of the united states it would be horrendous for everyone if you die in russia you die in real life see that one's true you do actually die there unlike canada you want to make that earth sandwich do you live in australia or new zealand australia do you have a piece of bread yes are you willing to go outside and place the bread down and take a selfie with the bread even though it's late over there anything for you completed the sandwich my brother earth sandwich satanists don't believe in a literal satan then what do you call people who believe in a literal satan christians ooh if i was a lifeguard would you let me save you pretty sure i'd let any lifeguard save me yeah it's kind of uh their job my parents telling me to give school a hundred percent ah i see how you broke it down that's what i'm talking about tuesday's a little much for me that's my least favorite day of the week so maybe we could reallocate that to somewhere along the lines of friday i have a taser in my car and my dad just accidentally tased himself with it that's shocking [Laughter] solar energy is actually nuclear energy from a safe distance yeah that's a big distance let's see if we can move it a little bit closer so we can make the solar panels get energy faster man's [ __ ] wins first prize it wasn't hard says birthday boy all was his birthday too or was it the cock's birthday whose birthday was it i need to know wanna see my [ __ ] um sure that's your vagina i wanna see your cat i don't have a cat then why are you wasting my time it's true that dogs are loyal but cats don't tell the police where you hide your drugs it's because they're impossible to train they're little [ __ ] also if they could talk they absolutely would rat on you okay this end should point towards the ground if you want to go to space if it starts pointing towards space you're having a bad problem and you will not go to space today can you guys stop reporting our tweets for spam it's funny it's like they told you not to do that but you did it anyway it has arrived i was gonna scroll right past this but suddenly it resonated with me oh man that would have been so much better if they didn't put it's springtime here it comes at the bottom no just leave the panels as is this area is under constant video surveillance if you try to remove this sticker we'll know taking a bath send pic yeah see i told you i'm taking a bath older generation kids these days are always using technology also them oh no thanks statistics show that teen pregnancy drops off significantly after age 25 after 25 really not 20 what's the difference between twitch and tinder i have a better chance of seeing a titty on twitch every triangle is a love triangle when you love triangles man that man was on something completely different wasn't he hey kids you want to live in the sewer fight crime and eat pizza for the rest of your life i mean that sounds like a pretty good gig not the living in the sewer part but i wouldn't mind fighting crime and eating pizza all the time with no consequences on my body and figure remember guys if you water water it grows mother of god hey babe can you tell me what an abortion is no baby or no baby no no baby cars in 2021 be like how it started how it's going oh i see i hate you god dang it i want this guy that i can't pronounce the name of out of the picture understood boss simple as that i don't like the idea of the mafia using smartphones they should be using those old old old landlines at all times it should be a requirement if you're not dating to marry then you're dating for heartbreak let that sink in i'm dating to get my emily oh panzer of the lake what is your wisdom r technically the truth is just shower thoughts that encourages reposting it's not shower thoughts it's dad jokes shut up getting robbed just say no your robber legally cannot take any of your possessions without your consent you're right you you are right but let's think about this for a minute and on that glorious note ladies and gents we've come to the end of another video but before we get going let's take a look at today's fan art news famous man does random sign known as gotham fan art i hope you like it you know what i don't like it i love it yeah i had you there for a second didn't i always remember folks if you even somewhat enjoyed this video consider dropping a like down below for us and if you really enjoyed the video well make sure to get yourself subscribed and click that bell icon and if you're feeling super generous why not check out my links in the description down below and until next time i'll catch you later

Channel: EmKay

Views: 394,592

Rating: 4.9660797 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, subreddit, best of reddit, r/ top posts, top posts, top posts of all time, reddit top posts, 100% True stories, reddit true stories, top all time, reddit posts, reddit stories, ask reddit, funny reddit, emkay, memes, technicallythetruth

Id: sNeNu3kXyXg

Length: 13min 43sec (823 seconds)

Published: Sat Apr 24 2021