r/Technicallythetruth · you got a permit for that?

who are these two wrong answers only doctors how's it going over to welcome back to easy peasy my name is Zach and today we're taking a look at our slash technically the truth what would you do with 1 billion dollars become a billionaire about how long is twenty seconds two verses of happy birthday three vines 20 Mississippi 30 Maine ten bars of most pop songs ten bars of Greek music ah that's a big number 20 seconds of screaming it's so hard being a single mom when you have no kids in our a male teenager reason why I don't let my girlfriend use my air pods red I don't have air pods white I don't have a girlfriend I can smell alcohol yeah that's because you're not respecting social distancing I'm if mandevilla I am NOT a legend I am a myth how many artifacts are in the British Museum at least two okay think about it like this people are made up of atoms and when you die your atoms go off and become other things this means that every girl would most likely be made up of atoms that were once in a dude so if you bang her you are technically banging a dude and that's freaking gay speech 100 global automobile sales 1571 ad zero England's oldest man says key to reaching 111 is avoiding dying he has such a way with words the letter B is P but pregnant oh my god if the university burns down or is destroyed otherwise all current students immediately graduate with a bachelor's degree hey Ferb I think you know we're gonna do today every student in Hiroshima and Nagasaki got a degree more degrees than they asked for Americans have literally no banter I don't know what country this is coming from but we've probably beaten you in a war at some point I'm American Civil War tell me everything you know the best barber can never receive the best haircut ooh did you know wrapping your leg in cabbage makes your leg smell like cabbage what Canada is a myth what Canada is a myth like zoo sir vaccines what do you on discord you know deep well that's not what I said dumb it Oh a chair is this orange or yellow that's a frickin card or this amazing sculpture is called the caring Hannon is located in Glarus Switzerland it's a palm tree I hate you what animal would be cutest have scaled down to the size of a cat cats man woman white black poor rich Asian caveman unga-bunga cigarette companies killed their best customers and condom companies killed their future customers doctor what happens after we die we clean the bed and emit a new patient yeah why does Cody look like he's wearing his girlfriend's boyfriend shirt because technically he is he looks like a combination of his biological mother and father when you find someone who completes you Germany really wasn't messing around with the emergency fund for freelancers the applications went live on Friday and 5,000 euro grants have already been transferred into people's accounts uh some yesterday because they know the consequences of a frustrated painter choosing a new occupation hey don't wait for me I'm at the hospital is everything okay I'm okay it's just my cousin he can't speak or walk oMG what happened nothing serious he was just born two hours ago that US in the first half not gonna lie Wikipedia crash send us a crash report what were you doing when the crash happened eating a bean and cheese taco how what the hell did you get dick from Richard you asked him nicely why were you absent at yesterday's match because I didn't come holy Frick dude yeah this is incredibly actually no it's a t-rex head at the start of every disaster movie there's a scientist being ignored true dove chocolate tastes way better than their soap true spider-man law being on your phone while driving is illegal this guy he's not a drug dealer mom he's a freelance unlicensed pharmacist egg one of the most popular forms of child to eat the most legal - oh my god Karen said with a righteous indignation your accent is awful where'd you even learn to speak English my stepmom held the most deadpan expression she could England friend what's the point in the existence me okay what about infinity plus one what about infinity plus infinity that's not a number that's an expression no it's called to infinity and beyond what is your favorite quote you build a man of fire he stays warm for a night set a man on fire and he stays warm for the rest of his life people who've got their crap together how lots of fiber how do I get a flat stomach by tomorrow yeah that'll do it Oh floor you're always there for me so supportive not like walls in the staircase is always getting in my way did you know there was a serial killer named Albert Fish he wrote letters to his victims parents to tell them how good their children taste it so he wrote food reviews Barack Obama former Chicago resident what I know I'm for what happens if I put water in the freezer it'd be a lot cooler if you did water froze on the car door like this Lowell how could it be possible it's cold this gate must be open or shut at all times what you spend your whole life gathering guests for your funeral oh hey [ __ ] have you seen my Oh My glob are you playing with yourself get out get out what is your secret for always staying down-to-earth well I mean gravity I love Keanu okay I know no one cares but seriously I can't stand green jelly beans and I love red jelly beans but I'm red green colorblind do you see my problem I can see your problem but you can reserve for green vehicles oh if you could rearrange the tea in the a in your name that'd be great this printer is here temporarily in the greater scheme of things aren't we all suddenly all of humanity loses the ability to live what happens we certainly will talk a lot less if humans go extinct literally no one will care true interviewer I want to ask you a question your answer should be quick me okay interviewer 12 plus 37 equals me quick me fact in the movie Avengers endgame before snapping his fingers Robert Downey jr. says and I am Iron Man this is a subtle nod to his older movies Iron Man Iron Man two Avengers Iron Man three Avengers age of Ultron Captain America Civil War spider-man Home Coming Avengers infinity war and a cameo in the Incredible Hulk where Robert Downey jr. in fact played the role of iron men huh not even I knew that one now that's pretty cool did you know the Japanese flag is actually a pie chart in the amount of Japan and Japan yeah I started carrying a knife after an attempted mugging a few years ago since then my mugging attempts have been a lot more successful Patrick Starr license to kill them what life Coe do you live by me I asked an EOD guy once about the stress of bomb defusing he shrugged and said it's not mom either right or suddenly it's not my problem anymore a linguist dies at the funeral a fellow academic asks the wife do you mind if I say a word she nods he stands and says plethora and immediately sits down she says tearfully that means a lot cheese is just a loaf of milk this implies a liquid form of bread beer frick daddy why is that book so thick it's a long story can you be your own grandpa suppose you marry a widow who already has a grown-up daughter and your father marries the widows grown-up daughter now the widow's daughter becomes your mother since your mother's mother is your wife your wife is also your grandmother as the husband of your grandmother you become your own grandpa Wow Mars is the only known planet inhabited solely by robots oh my god you're right ah math graffiti an interesting X exists mathematicians I don't know who you are but I will find you I wonder what the median age is in NYC younger than it was last week yikes I can't believe you've done this sometimes I forget that mermaidman and barnacleboy or humans that are the size of a squirrel yeah has a gut feeling or instinct save your life if so how not even a block of metal has saved my life a few times Americans will use anything except the metric system physical distancing maintain a distance of at least one alligator between each other cop whose car is this where you headed what do you do minor mine why did the monkey fall out of the tree because it was dead what rock group has four men that don't sing what Mount Rushmore get out this is not a drill I repeat this is not a drill nice for 21 national surprise drug test day guys be careful this video has nudity Thank You sergeant [ __ ] blocker describe Obama's presidency in one word Obama when you realize that the barrel cost more than the oil it's important that we don't let our son down okay honey dad why do you keep me locked in the Attic ask your mother in reality plants are actually farming us by giving us oxygen daily until we all eventually decompose so they can consume us did you know if your parachute doesn't deploy you have the rest of your life to fix it speedrunners are literally spending all of their time in games try not to spend much time in games no no he's got a point so far you've survived 100% of your worst days good job people born in the 1600s starter pack nice people on Jupiter must look at earth and think it's a planet for ants earth is a planet for ants name this plant please George I guess I got what I asked for made on earth tidal pooping on people what rick gastly for prime minister he will never give you up let you down run around desert you make you cry say goodbye tell a lie or hurt you I am a genie and will grant you three wishes what is first I want to be rich what is your second wish rich rise and shine I could just hear like oh do ma Teng sounds this is an explosion of light wasn't this leaf green before I hate Russian dolls what they're so full of themselves what right one sentence about how your life today is different from Theodore Roosevelt's life I am alive and he already died what happened to you I swallowed some Scrabble tiles looks like your next crab could spell disaster if a serial killer is chasing you you're both running for your life oh yeah pastor's sermon got a youtube comment from Abaddon Indonesia and now his bio says he's an internationally acclaimed speaker when a free ride in a police car just by shoplifting from this store lucky winners can also get their name in the newspaper for their friends and family to see won't mom be so proud every naked person I see turns me on all languages travel at the speed of sound except sign language that travels at the speed of light without you sixty minutes feels like one hour oh I love you I still don't get Bitcoin imagine if keeping your car idling 24/7 produced solve Sudokus you could trade for heroin I'm still mad about the alien shirt wish send me Alan in space nobody can hear you in space I'd wear it around just to see if anyone noticed spaghetti tastes like spaghetti true deaf people that are missing a finger have a speech impediment oh my god based on statistical evidence I'm immortal how so haven't died yet in Sweden it is forbidden by law to be a criminal really all of How I Met Your Mother is narrated from the perspective of Ted Mosby so what I'm really saying here is that all of How I Met Your Mother is a TEDTalk living has always been a large part of my life I was born at an incredible young age and ever since then I've been alive where am i testicle summer removed removed it's just a better way of throwing a rock yeah pretty much my tinder bio says that I have a corner office with views of the entire city drive a $500,000 vehicle and that I'm paid to travel my dates are always upset when I tell them I'm a bus driver what do you use to make toast an actual toaster grill grape or bread ah I speak Spanish let me translate huh most people think that t-rexes can't clap because they have short arms but really it's because they are dead dog Oh true what a good dog oh there is no physical evidence to say that today's Tuesday we all just have to trust someone that counts since the first or whatever so I was at Walmart earlier and lady was looking at frozen turkeys but she couldn't find one big enough she asked the stock boy do these turkeys get any bigger he replied with a straight face no ma'am they're dead made my week give him a raise you technically have two minutes to live but every time you breathe it restarts the clock oh I wonder what's going on under that roof massive water damage if I had to guess teacher you can't breathe underwater me say it with me vacuums don't cause autism you don't wash your hands they wash each other and you just sit there and watch change my mind whether Rock dead on weather predictor if Rock is wet it's raining warm it's sunny white it's snowing moving it's windy well well well correct uh I mean yeah yeah why does he call milk white stuff because it's white and it's stuff white oh w hits E okay what do you call a yellow horse a yellow horse in the 1964 movie Zulu real Zulu tribesman played themselves congratulations you played yourself and well that brings us to the end of our slash technically the truth thank you all so much for watching if you enjoyed what you saw be sure to that subscribe button in the bells you get no divider that music easy uploads and until the next one I'll see you around [Music]

Channel: EzPz

Views: 90,449

Rating: 4.9633384 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, reddit top posts, reddit best posts, reddit top posts of all time, top posts of all time, top posts, best posts, posts, reddit posts, reddit funny, r/, subreddit, top all time, reddit true stories, r/technicallythetruth, r/technicallythetruth top posts, technically the truth, r/technicallythetruth best posts, r/technicalythetruth emkay, emkay, r/technicallythetruth ezpz, ezpz, ez pz

Id: d7CfRuuS47U

Length: 12min 27sec (747 seconds)

Published: Sun Jun 07 2020