r/Relationships My Boyfriend Said He Wants to Kill Me!

welcome to our slash relationship advice where Opie's boyfriend says that he wants to murder her I'm a 32 year old male and I overheard my 32 year old girlfriend tell her sister that she's dating down being with me because she makes more money than me and is surprised that I don't have roommates I make a hundred and thirty-five thousand dollars a year and she makes two hundred and five thousand dollars a year my girlfriend and I have been together for eight months so a bit about ourselves I graduated from a top 10 public university and I work at a great architecture firm in New York City as a senior project architect because I know people will ask I make in total one hundred and thirty-five thousand dollars a year my girlfriend works as a software developer she went to a decent state school and works at a tech company as an engineer when we go out for dates in the beginning I used to pay all the time now we're closer to 60/40 when it comes to salary she specifically asked I don't like to have that conversation but hey I thought if we're gonna get married one day then it's important to know when I told her she got a bit shy about sharing hers but I didn't mind and my girlfriend prides herself on being a feminist so I didn't think anything of it I thought she was worried she was going to embarrass me but I didn't care this is how things went down I was in the living room working out and she was on her phone with her sister I was doing push-ups and wasn't paying attention but it went like this her sister was going to leave DC to come to New York City and she was like oh I don't want to come to New York City that dating here is a hellhole this is when I started listening and she said that she has to date down she said that Opie is a sweet guy but he doesn't do that well he only makes a hundred and thirty thousand dollars I'm surprised he wasn't living with roommates she went into other parts and then mentioned this isn't what she envisioned with life after she got off the phone I confronted her first of all she gets angry at me saying that she deserves privacy and I told her that was BS that she talks about being open so let's talk this thing is massively summarized we talked for over six hours and resulted in me leaving for my cousin's apartment long story short she told me that she loved me and is happy with me she then says it's just that if I'm going to judge you by societal norms that we all know is out there I'm not doing that well I got angry about all of this I told her that I'm doing great in my field that her field pays more but that doesn't make her better than me and that my title is much higher than hers that I actually managed a team of ten she starts going off on how computer science brings in a lot more talented people but it doesn't matter that she doesn't want to have this conversation because it's hurting my male ego I got angry and told her that my ego is just fine that being talked down to is messed up this leads to more back and forth and then if she wants to compare me by societal standards for men then I'll compare her to societal standards for women that she isn't to catch by any means and does anyone really want a 30-year old girlfriend she starts crying and insulting me more she says that she gave me a shot and then I treat her like this I got even angrier and after this I just left I don't know what to say I'm okay with dating a woman that makes more than me really I don't mind but I hate that she thinks that she's smarter and dating down being with me that's messed up also in our conversation she compared me to some of her exes that had more money than me and I can understand that if a girl is used to a guy paying for everything it can be a bit of a change of pace I get that look I wish I made enough to where I could pay the bill without blinking I wish I could and I hope to one day but the catch is these guys didn't even date her they hooked up a couple of times and they might have taken her to a couple of fancy restaurants they weren't official I'm sorry if this came off as ranty this fight happened yesterday I'm still in my cousin's apartment my girlfriend has called me a couple of times and I haven't picked up I don't know what to do I feel like even if she does apologize intrinsically she might just believe that I'm inferior and she has to settle she might just say some things to stroke my ego and that's it at this point is the relationship basically dead is it even worth salvaging at this point I know I said some mean things too and if she was to apologize I would as well I don't want to put anyone down but at the same time the thought that she was being snobbish and looking down at me from my financial situation just really irks what do you guys suggest I do down in the comments there's this reply from ATS dayglo kitten I'm a software consultant and former developer I make more money than my husband who's a sound engineer we met at university where we both studied for and gained the same stem degree he's far smarter than I am he found his passion for his career I went for money her argument that tech attracts more talented people is laughable women like this make my blood boil feminists only when it suits them she's covering up for her antiquated views that the man should be the provider she's a freakin sexist dinosaur and he will be well shot of her our next reddit post is some throw away over at all I've been dating my boyfriend for about a year now and for the most part he's been absolutely wonderful I love him so much we have a pretty intense romantic life and I'm usually really chill with that however recently he's been taking it a little too far like I love choking and spanking in the bedroom but he started doing it in public like today we took our dog to the park and I said or did something he didn't like and he spanked me I was shocked later on in the day we were doing the deed and he started to choke me again which I usually like it got to a point where I properly couldn't breathe so I used our signal to stop and he just looked down at me and said I'm not gonna stop because I'm in the mood to kill you he must have seen the fear in my eyes or something and he immediately let go and like cradled me and said sorry I thought it was just him being in the moment so I let it go but it happened a second time he was just like staring at me and was whispering sweet things to me and then it took a turn to your mind forever never gonna let you go I'll kill you if you leave I recoil because it made me uncomfortable and he like tickled me and told me it was a joke like I love this man but WTF how do I bring this up with him to be honest I am tempted to leave we both don't have dark senses of humor so I don't know where this came from how do I address this what should I say down in the comments it's just reply after apply after apply of sweetheart these are major red flags and so Opie posted an update I just wanted you all to know that last night while he was sleeping I took my dog Daisy and left my boyfriend in the middle of the night I met a safe location staying with family and have been in contact with the police trying to get an intervention order so me and my dog can stay safe from him thank you all so very much for your support and concern you've all saved my life I'm a 24 year old female and my 24 year old boyfriend planned a road trip with me and his three friends and I've been uninvited for starters my boyfriend and I have been dating for four years our anniversary was in April and we planned to do a road trip for it obviously that couldn't happen because of the quarantine last month he brought up the idea of a road trip with me his friends and his friends girlfriend this would be happening next year I thought this was a good idea as I'm friends with his male friend and his girlfriend but not necessarily his female friend to tell you the truth I have always been quite wary of their relationship my previous boyfriend cheated on me and I've still got some insecurities I need to work out I hadn't heard more about it since the trip was brought up in the first place so I asked my boyfriend if it would still be going ahead he said they decided it would be a no girlfriends allowed trip and I was fine with that me and him could always go ourselves another time and I know friends need time to hang out without their partners nothing more was said about it until today when I happened to glance at his screen and saw that they'd made a group chat and we're talking about it I also saw his friend's girlfriend was messaging in it I asked him why she was in it if she wasn't going he got defensive and instantly turned a screen away from me I asked him why he did that and he said it's a private conversation I then asked if I could look through the messages I found out that she's still invited and it's just me who's been uninvited I would understand if she was one of his friends but she's actually not in fact I haven't heard him say one nice word about her I guess my boyfriend just doesn't want me there but is fine with someone he dislikes I feel so left out as I was made to believe I was part of this friendship group but anything we've even asked me why I'm not going I don't know if I misconstrued the situation and have made a big deal out of nothing but I'm just incredibly hurt by this as it's not exactly fair she gets to go when I can't I'm planning on talking to him about it tomorrow but I just want to get advice and then Opie posted an update I confronted my boyfriend the day after posting this turns out he didn't want to tell me that his friend's girlfriend despises me I was shocked at this as when we've been around her she's been nothing but nice to me he showed me a private message sheets into him and she had demanded I didn't go on the trip she also told him I was cheating on him I was really shocked so I messaged her and she said that she was uncomfortable with her boyfriend being around me as I was really flirty around him the last time we hung out that's absolutely not true if I was being flirty don't you think my boyfriend would have seen that plus I have enough respect for my boyfriend that I absolutely would not do that ever my boyfriend's told me stories in the past about how his friend's girlfriend is very controlling and paranoid about other girls and won't even let him have female friends I just didn't think she'd act that way with me the only thing I can think of is that when we last hung out I accidentally touched his leg as we were at a cramped booth together so she is definitely reaching there also during that night she made a huge deal about him messaging another girl so much so we had to leave early as she demanded to go home my boyfriend kept what she's into himself as he didn't want to cause any more rifts he only has two friends he made the excuse of us and not her my feelings I get it I do but I'm an adult woman I can handle someone disliking me he thought he was sparing my feelings but why he thought I would be more hurt by someone I barely know disliking me than from being essentially uninvited from our anniversary trip is beyond me I feel as if he took her side in it I know he hates confrontation and that's fine for him but I want a boyfriend who can stand up for me he doesn't even know her for God's sake I'm assuming he didn't want to lose his friend his girlfriend is very manipulative to tell you the truth I also thought he was planning on hooking up with his female friend with two guys and two girls going how could I not think that I'm not breaking up with him we talked about it and he's not going on the trip he told his male friend this situation and he's likely going to break up with his girlfriend as this isn't the first time she's done this Opie the way that your boyfriend handled the situation is very suspicious if I disappointed my wife from our anniversary trip and instead went with another girl then I would no longer be married our next reddit post is from throw away my wife and I had been married for slightly more than three years now last Christmas I found she'd been having a long conversation with a co-worker of hers in which they talked about passionately hugging multiple times and that they couldn't wait for the next one the guy said he was gonna book a hotel near their office right after Christmas in this conversation when he said he was looking forward to seeing my wife she would reply with things like I'm looking forward to much more than just seeing you etc you get the idea overly flirty and sexual when I confronted my wife she denied the conversation existed after deleting it she showed me her phone to prove it didn't exist but I had taken a few pictures she said that it was all virtual and that they never did anything physical to prove she was right she messaged her co-worker in front of me asking if he had booked the hotel he replied not yet she then asked if he was really expecting them to meet to which he replied negatively she promised they would never talk again and I agreed simply because I loved her a lot and one is a trust her but in my mind I wasn't completely sure she'd been honest for a few weeks I must admit I checked her phone a few too many times so she changed her password which I was fine with because I was probably being too paranoid this week I picked her phone up because I needed a phone that had been sent to her phone number I didn't need to unlock the screen to get it to my surprise under the message with the code there were other messages from the same guy one of them was an audio the second one was a shirtless photo of himself in front of a mirror and the third one had sweaty and a few oh geez with the tongue I confronted her since she promised they would never talk again and she said he just wanted to show her he's going to the gym to show progress but that the rest of the time they talk it's just about work and this is just a coincidence I asked her to show me the rest of their messages but she said she'd mistakenly deleted their conversation history my wife said she's going to change this time and that I never really forgave her and that's why she keeps talking to the guy she says this time she's really gonna stop but I have a hard time believing it or even if she does stop I fear when things don't go well between us she'll do it again I really love her but I can't keep living like this is there any situation in which this can work what would you do so while you were listening to this story I'm guessing you had approximately the same reaction I had while I was reading it which is holy cow dude this lady is already cheating on you how can you not see that down in the comments everyone is basically begging Opie to open his eyes and eventually Opie post an update after reading every single comment of the reddit post my brain just couldn't overcome the catastrophe and the collapse of the world I built from me in which my wife is my love my best friend and partner as well as the person I admire the most she was entirely perfect and made me happy for many years I thought no couple in the world could have what we had we were both very happy for a long time we were both attractive we were both inherently good had big hearts and were individually wildly successful in our careers after the reddit post I moved to an air B&B and eventually with family to think things through it was a terrible time but a psychologist helped me recover from a terrible mental state it coincided with the pandemic hitting very hard in my city I caught the virus which didn't help during this time we kept talking and my wife was very sorry and continued saying they hadn't met I knew it wasn't true but was willing to forgive the woman of my dreams who continued being in the highest alter of my universe fast forward last Saturday morning I went back to our place ready to forgive her and talk things through in the most mature way possible and well there she was but I was the one who received the biggest surprise to say the least the guy was in my house naked and so was my wife the guy from the message is the guy from the pics the one she said she didn't even like I caught him hiding in my bathroom as my wife was putting her pajamas on when I saw him hiding in my bathroom he uttered sorry dude for a second I asked myself is this where I kill him but I instantly replied I got nothing against you because the guy was just nailing this hot woman even if he was doing so in a house full of pictures of me pictures of our wedding and our family's pictures of my dead father who would be so sad to see how the marriage he never witnessed was going to end he's always been the reason I tried to make the world a better place he passed away two months before our wedding I'm sorry I still love her to death but I understand enough is enough even if my world collapses I hope I can build a new one without lies and in which I'm not just a blind believer under the altar of a fake God Godspeed that was our sloshed relationship advice and if you liked this video then hit that subscribe button because I put out new reddit videos every single day

Channel: rSlash

Views: 400,433

Rating: 4.9446058 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, comedy, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, relationshipadvice, relationship_advice, relationship advice, r/relationship_advice, relationship_advice posts, relationship, r/relationships

Id: rFcbVXW-fFQ

Length: 16min 42sec (1002 seconds)

Published: Mon Jun 29 2020