r/Pettyrevenge I Sent My Rude Neighbor a Glitter Bomb!

welcome to our slash petty revenge where no revenge is too small back in high school I dated a guy will call Jared after school Jared and I would hang out at his place with a group of 3 to 5 friends one girl and our group of friends was interesting we'll call her Trixie Trixie was a petite girl whose entire personality revolved around being cute and petite also despite being in a relationship herself she was clearly into Jared she would claim that things were too heavy and ask only him to carry them comment on how tall he was compared to her ask him for piggyback rides just general nonsense that made both of us sort of uncomfortable I wouldn't tolerate this now but we did at the time because we liked hanging out with her boyfriend well it being that time of the month I bought a new box of tampons to keep under the sink it was one of those variety packages that includes different sizes important for later later that afternoon I went to grab one and noticed that 6 or 7 of the Lite tampons were already missing what the hell then I realized Trixie had been going to the bathroom a lot being so aggressively petite and adorable I guess she considered it beneath her to use regular tampons when we hang out the next day she finished all the light ones I was wondering what she'd do when she approached me off to the side and asked if I had any more I quietly told her no sorry but she could always use a bigger size so she wouldn't have to change him so often she answered very loudly looking right at Jared oh I can't use jumbo tampons like you I'm Way too tiny what the hell I guess she thought it would sound sexy or something so what did I do I hid the entire box of tampons in his room and replaced it with a box of diaper thick maxi pads that I only wear to bed the next time she went to the bathroom she was in there a long time probably searching for the tampons I'd moved when she finally came out wearing one of the diaper sized pads she crinkled like a frickin newspaper whenever she walked Jared knowing full-well asked the room at large what's that sound she left shortly afterward she also Kohl's children me from then which was just an added bonus as far as I was concerned as a cherry on top of the cake I heard through the grapevine that she's gained at least 50 pounds since high school bet she don't ask other people's boyfriends for piggyback rides anymore huh Turk see our next reddit poses from KP when I was 13 so eight years ago my dad remarried after divorcing my mom four years before before the divorce his fiance had been his mistress my mom is completely better off without him and ignoring the fact that I wouldn't exist I don't think she would have married him in the first place even if I think my parents weren't a good match that's no excuse to cheat on your wife my dad's new wife was effing vile in all sorts of ways she constantly belittled me made fun of the fact I needed to take pills for my mental illness despite being an effing pharmacist I don't get it either and was generally awful to me in my siblings but she was a decade younger than my dad and reasonably hot so he didn't give a flip how she treated us the one time he actually listened to us about her is when they were thinking of having a baby and my brother said he'd ask our mom to sue for full custody of us if they did so anyway they got married I was a bridesmaid because that jerk had no real friends the other two bridesmaids were her sister and my sister my brother was the best man because she didn't like my dad's best friend she and my dad still don't talk to this day even though the guy was like an uncle to me as a little kid it was a wedding everything went normally but at the beginning of the reception before the first dance we were taking pictures in front of a chocolate fountain looking like the happy family we never were and would never be I'm on the autism spectrum and have a problem maintaining eye contact that extends to looking at a camera so when we had to retake a photo because I wasn't looking she leans down and whispers something in my ear I'm not going to repeat it but it involved the R word I don't like saying it anyway I kind of snapped and decided she was gonna pay for this no one noticed or at least no one called me out when I started slowly moving the chocolate fountain towards the edge of the table when it got to the edge it makes contact with the back of that pure white wedding dress and slowly drips down by the time she notices it looks like she's pooed herself but for all anyone else knows this was an accident she has no spare dress and that stain is not coming out so first stands cutting the cake speeches everything this woman has what looks like a poo stain on the back of her dress it was a small revenge but it was so worth it what's supposed to be the happiest day of this stupid woman's life and she's gonna remember that stain every time she thinks about it they never did get the stain out and nobody knew it was me until now I guess hi family if you're reading this Susie you're a grunt and you deserve that chocolate stain Oh P the best part about this story is that you can kill two birds with one stone after ruining the wedding you can take the photos frame them and present them to your mom as an amazing Mother's Day present our next reddit post is from poor man's yacht club one day I came home from work and someone else's car was parked out front of my house no matter I park outside my neighbor's house when I wake up the next day and go out to my car to leave for work there's a note tuft on my windshield I unfold it and it reads do not Park here ever again or else in a font so large it takes up the whole page of paper I folded it up place it in my glove box and there it's sad for nearly a year until the day he parked out front of my house I took the note he left me on his window and went to bed the next day as I was enjoying my morning coffee I watched my neighbor's wife go to get in the car and notice the note she read it with a puzzled look that quickly turned to rage I thought she would storm over to ask me about it but apparently she recognized her husband's handwriting and went to ask him he had to sheepishly explain to her that he left it on my car and she brought him over her tail between his legs to apologize we had a beer he stared at the floor the whole time it was cool Opie I'm impressed that shows a masterful level of patience our next reddit post is from Gotham with glitter I teach kids online so naturally I have to be on the phone and video chatting with them I'm working one day and my neighbor decisis aren't blasting music and I instantly can't hear my students anymore so I go outside to ask him to turn it down he has this speaker on his front step just cranked all the way up here's how the exchange went um excuse me can you turn down your music I'm on the phone with the student your music is a little loud so so I'm on the phone I can't hear my student so I'm trying to do my job I'm working so so can you please turn your music down yeah I'm mapping doing it get back to your house he was confrontational and angry from the second I started talking and clearly had no intention of turning it down so I just walked away and as I'm walking away he was like you want to do it like that I laughing to it like that I was just so baffled that this guy would be such a butthole for literally no reason immediately I'm trying to do my freaking job and he hurt my feelings so f that guy I mailed him a homemade glitter bomb I folded it up and glued the edges so he'll have to pull it open and the glitter will explode everywhere our next reddit post session thanked pink hair with all this copán 19 going around I wanted to share something my mom found on her front lawn a few days ago some jerk decided to make my mom's front lawn his new garbage bin there were like three to four bags of household trash thrown across her driveway and into our neighbor's yard and driveway - I know gross right lucky for her she looked through some of the bags and found he had left all of his personal information inside the bags like bills credit card numbers and phone numbers just saying if you have no problem dumping your garbage on a 71 year old woman's front lawn for her to clean up don't be surprised when you get a cleaning bill from the city my mom is calling the city tomorrow for them to find them as far as I know our city fines for dumping started five hundred dollars and go up our next reddit post is from Caribbean kick at our three children have been social distancing at home since school closed in our state in March we have three moody a 15 year old girl magellan an 11-year old boy and the dictator a four year old boy the husband and I are essential workers and are gone a lot and things at home have been collapsing into a pseudo Lord of the Flies about Magellan he's on the spectrum and is genuinely one of the nicest kids you'll ever meet he's kind compassionate absolutely brilliant and will find something good about every person and every situation his ability to find joy and small things makes me so grateful for him he's one of the kids bullies will fight to protect if he ever got into a fight he would literally say that was bad and I'm upset kid looked really nice today before he hit me I say all this to say that it takes a lot to piss Magellan off but if you do the result will be a precisely calculated revenge plot anyway the husband and I keep telling moody not to ask the boys for their snacks she's the oldest and the boys adore her this usually results in her getting whatever she asked for through some combination of harassment manipulation and guilt it isn't fair to them and we wanted to stop but with work we just aren't at home to see it all on Friday she asked Magellan for the chocolate milk that came in his lunch delivery he said no and she started her two-day campaign of harassment none of which we knew about until Sunday night when she asked in front of us for the chocolate milk Magellan looked disappointed said fine and handed the milk to his sister it happened so fast that we didn't even react she slunk off to the kitchen to enjoy the spoils of her victory Magellan did nothing once she left the room but sit on the carpet and smirk what moody never stopped to consider was the fact that Magellan hates chocolate milk he hates it so much in fact that he never bothered to refrigerate the carton he instead stashed the chocolate milk in a bookshelf and let it cook for two days all while she harassed him the calm demeanor and the smirk on his face was him simply waiting to hear the screaming coming from the kitchen when she opened the carton and took a sip Moody did not let him down within seconds screaming erupted from the kitchen punctuated with gross discs sting and OMG Magellan Magellan didn't move from the carpet and instead sat still and said in his quietest voice Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet eating her curds and whey before bursting into maniacal laughter it was glorious he exploited her obnoxious behavior and coolly planned his vengeance he felled the teenage monster in a way that the adults haven't come close to I am proud of that boy our next reddit post is from GT 2810 this happened quite a long time ago when I had my first office job I did fairly well and after a while was promoted and got my own room with it came my own phone line the day after it was installed I arrived at work to find the message light blinking I checked and the mailbox was full with 20 messages odd I thought there must be some mistake there sure was a message after message from people wanting to book a chalet while I was still checking the messages calls started coming in hello yes I want to book a chalet do you have one available for this weekend uh you have the wrong number but this is name of company right no this is an office in town but the number is this phone number yes that's my number but this is an office we don't have anything to do with chalets but I want to book a chalet um we don't do chalets you have the wrong number but your number is such-and-such right yes it's my number but this is an office not that other company we don't do chalets so the conversation went and the moment I hung up another call came in and another I had the phone off the hook all day the next day I decided to put the phone back it rang immediately hello hello I went to book a chalet you have the wrong number is this such-and-such phone number yes that's my number but this is not the company but this flyer has this phone number flyer what flyer this flyer for a special offer on all chalets between these dates so I ended the call and looked for the main line of the company I called them and told them I couldn't do any work because of all the calls that were coming in because they printed my numbers on their flyer I said to them so you printed my numbers on your flyers my phone is ringing non-stop I can't get any work done that's not possible do you have a flyer or the artwork yes I'll just have a look and yes is that my number on your flyer um yes it must be a mistake I'm sure it is a big one what are you gonna do the Flyers have all been given out there's nothing we can do how many Flyers were printed 10,000 they couldn't do anything they didn't want to do anything I asked him to pay for changing the line and they refused he didn't offer anything and even asked me to direct all the colors to them at the correct number so I started answering all the calls it took a week but I told everyone we were fully booked till the end of the promotion I love this top comment from odd socket you could have been evil hi yes I'm happy to take your booking no no deposit necessary grab a pen though I'm going to give you our complaints number in case there's an issue after check-in our next reddit post is from lemon sloth cake me and my friend went to see Aquaman last month we buy our usual seats middle seats in the back row and then head into the theater as we get to the back row we realized that there's an old couple sat exactly in our seats instead of telling them to move we decided to sit on the end of the back row instead but now the screen is off-center so we move a row 4 and sit in the center off by 2 seats just so we aren't sitting directly in front of the couple we settle into our seats when suddenly I'm tapped on the shoulder I look up to see the old lady standing above me and she says are you settled now girls in a stern tone I open my mouth to reply but before I can she continues you're hopping all over the place where are your seats this is rude now I was annoyed I was trying to be nice and non-disruptive but the old crone was being so rude so I stand up pick up my things and gesture my friends to come with me we get to the back row and I walk right down to where they are she asked me what I was doing so I pulled out my phone's flash shot and showed them the tickets then pointed to the numbers on their chairs you're in our seats she started to sputter about how they were there first but we just stood there waiting they weren't budging until they saw a cinema worker into the screen the old man apologized but the old one would just continue complaining about kids having no respect but we got to enjoy the movie in our seats worth it even if the movie was garbage that was our slash petty revenge and if you enjoyed this content then hit that like button because it really helps my channel grow

Channel: rSlash

Views: 561,297

Rating: 4.9363904 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, funniest posts, funny, comedy, funniest reddit posts, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, pettyrevenge, petty revenge, r/pettyrevenge

Id: fsxAp7J8nGQ

Length: 16min 4sec (964 seconds)

Published: Sat May 23 2020