r/Choosingbeggars "GIVE ME YOUR PUPPY!"

welcome to our slash using beggars where people beg for free money this is about the greatest thing I've seen on the Internet today the background is DMC the world's leading manufacturer of hand embroidery threads called floss launched a competition asking artists to design embroidery patterns for them for free there's no prize and the artists give up all rights to the patterns which DMC used to sell floss artists responded perfectly here's a selection of the top entries from Instagram fu DMC artists have bills to pay if you pay me pay artists pay artists pay artists exposure doesn't put food on the table pay artists rip the artists died 2018 from exposure stitching is my freedom but it's not effing free pay artists hello are you the guy that got that pump from Facebook yeah why yeah I talked to the owner and you can't have it anymore when can I come pick it up 6 p.m. is that good for you excuse me yeah it's my daughter's birthday tomorrow and the owner said I could have it when can I come pick it up I'm sorry but I don't know you the dog has been mine for five days now I won't just give it away because it's her birthday I'm sorry bye oh come on don't be such a prick you can literally get a free dog anywhere shaking my head you're gonna ruin her birthday when can I come is 6 p.m. good for you hello it's not about the fact that it was free it's just my dog it has been for a week and will stay that way I can't help you any further I told my daughter and you made her cry are you happy now you hopped her of her present you prick go after yourself who in their right mind would do that please leave my dog and I alone I am sorry I was rude wait can I come pick it up hello hello go kill yourself you bastard after reading hundreds of choosing beggar stories I feel like the best way to measure just how much of a choosing beggar someone is is by looking at how much they use the term hello hey is the table up for sale yes how about $50 no the table is handcrafted oke I'd like at least 150 I can't go higher than 50 I am unemployed at the moment and it is hard to get a job I am a single mother and you would ruin the home of a family if you don't give me the table please if you give me the 150 I can give you the table Fe jerk hey girl how's it going hi what's up I just wanted to say hi don't be so suspicious sorry well we just haven't talked in a while so I figured something was up if you were texting me no I saw you made those cute earrings for blank and it totally reminded me to check in with you yeah those were fun to make how are you I'm so busy I'm having dinner with blank next weekend and I have nothing to wear I have so much shopping to do low or low but you like shopping right so it'll be fun yeah but I'm totally lost on what to wear for jewelry could you make me some I'd be so so so grateful uh are you sure I only really make earrings and I don't use conventional materials unless you want fishbait earrings I don't know if I can help you no no no I was hoping I could get some like the ones you made for blank the pom-pom ones those were custom made it'll take me more than a week to make them and I'll need to ship them to you so it might not get to you in time I think you should just hit up Target or something sorry can't you just work on them over the weekend and shift them overnight on Monday its pom-poms glued to a wire um Nasus I think five classes work three jobs and it requires time to glue those pom-poms to a wire I could shoot them being done on Wednesday or Thursday and overnight them to you but you'd have to pay me more for shipping if that's okay how much is shipping I don't know last time I shipped a package overnight it was like thirty bucks but also it was a big package so I don't know how much the earrings will cost you overall you can put the price at like 10 bucks for the earrings plus 20 for the shipping at the moment if you want to pay me the ten bucks you can VIN mow me the shipping fees once I figure out how much it'll be blank said you made her as for free they were her birthday present and she's also my friend I am your friend too oh my god did you just forget all of junior and senior year did you just forget sophomore year when you spread a rumor that I was a lesbian and nobody would stand near me in the locker rooms or senior year when you spread the rumor that I was Jewish for some reason or March when you called me a dyke and told blank that I'd been hitting on you I think I'm being really forgiving by just answering your texts and giving you the time of day even when you've treated me like doodoo with no apology just pay me for my earrings or don't get them at all don't be like that I was so young when the whole locker room stuff happened and I was high off my butt when I called you that I didn't mean it blank sis you'd never apologize for any of it though if you said hey sorry I was coked out of my mind when I called you a homophobic slur I would think about forgiving you but you never did so we're not friends I am sorry that I called you that I hope you can't forgive me you're apologizing because you want stuff from me go to Target I'm not selling to you you're being really selfish right now I don't even want to be your friend you're so terrible to Blanken me we just want to be your friends and you're mean to us full offense but I don't want to be your guys as friends either blank is faking a pregnancy and scoliosis right now and you're just a bad person who hinges her entire personality on making homecoming court in senior year so I don't really give a flip about either of your opinions but like suck my butthole you're a nasty little jerk nobody effing likes you this is why your dad left you at least I didn't cheat on my boyfriend and blame him for it happy you you know at some level I kinda have to admire what choosing beggars are doing this choosing beggar is basically sucking up to one of their enemies in order to save $30 honestly that's a lot of dedication hey man what's up it's a blink wanting to know if we could talk about something what's up well I know you are a pilot and you have instructed people to do you think you could instruct me I work about 60 hours a week man and I'm barely back in town it would be hard but I could when I'm free it would be about 35 bucks an hour you would also need to pay for the plane rental and whatnot can't you just request off for two weeks or something and if we split the plane rental cost do I still need to pay you hourly no I can't request off two weeks how does us splitting the rental fee and in return I don't get an hourly rate make any sense dude I can recommend you a school to rent from but I'm not paying for half of it and you have to pay the 35 an hour whatever I guess that works okay we can do some flying Sunday since I'm off do you think your dad could get me a job at Delta he is retiring in September and is already getting me a job sorry bud you won't even have the ATP minimums by then anyways literally EFI you dude you are clearly still a wussy just like in high school I don't want your training either no wonder you were so disliked you won't even amount to anything even with your doodoo of a pilot dad's recommendation they are probably making him retired because he is incompetence now they will have to deal with your stupid butt okay yeah say okay because you're afraid of anything happening if you say something stupid but I'm a grown man and have more important things to worry about than what you have to say words of a true wussy go after yourself and a quick follow-up not only did Opie post this conversation on reddit he also shared it with his dad look at what this kid I went to high school had to say about you alone ask if he has ever flown an f16 for his country and provided for his family did not think so gotta go love you who would you rather have fly your aircraft the guy who flew an f-16 or the guy who peaked at 16 so can you make a youtube banner for me of course I can help my youtube banners are on a special at the moment five dollars each please tell me what type of banner you are looking at I don't pay people bro I won't pay I want a free banner bye I don't understand the issue if you want a free youtube banner why not just get your fans to do it that way you get masterpieces like these selling iPhone plus case is it still available yes it is still available is it an iPhone no just the case I am sorry bye you have to give me a phone because it doesn't tell it's an iPhone case so you have to give me an iPhone I'm sorry what the picture clearly shows it's a case but it says iPhone 6 7 or 8 plus I don't know what you want it's a phone case I wanna I phone well then go buy one because I don't have one to sell you please I don't have one I have a phone case that's all yes you have one because it says iPhone 6 7 8 no I do not it says iPhone 6 7 8 plus case plus just changed it either way the picture is just a case I don't owe you anything so this happened a great many years ago at my very first job I worked drive-through at Krispy Kreme Doughnuts our store had just opened and was the second in the state so we were busy with lines out the door from day one for those who don't know Krispy Kremes big draw is the hot light when the neon orange sign is on you can come in and get a free original-style donut no purchase required the first month we were open the hot light was almost always on in the first week management started to notice scammers they would come aside for a free donut and then go through our I threw and get another usually without making any purchases it happened enough to become a problem so we solved it by only giving out free donuts if you came inside we put a sign up in front of the drive-through saying to come inside for your free donuts so that no one got any unhappy surprises after waiting a long line this didn't stop people from trying to get a free one through the drive-through our boss allowed us to make minor exceptions at our discretion if someone made a gigantic order or was handicapped etc we would still give a doughnut if they asked one day a minivan came through and ordered one or two donuts they came up asking for their free ones as well I said sorry but our policies that you must come inside for the free donuts please we don't want to have to get our kids out of the car they shifted in their seats and sure enough there were two small children in car seats I decided to make an exception for them and grab four hot donuts choosing beggars beamed the kids were happy and then they ruined it actually we have five more kids at home can we get donuts for them too no I can't give away donuts to people that aren't here I don't even have to give you these ones but I want it to be nice the choosing beggars and now scowling we want to speak to the manager about this I shrugged and was happy to let someone else deal with these people so I could get back to my increasingly long drive-thru line I tell the manager exactly what was going on he came over to talk to them the manager said I'm sorry there seems to be a misunderstanding here choosing beggars smile smugly at me as per policy we do not give any free donuts out in drive-through you are welcome to come inside and we will give one to each person that is present manager took the hot donuts still in my hands and put them back on the line shut the window on their choosing beggars and walked away he was as sick of beggars as the rest of us choosing beggars flip me off and drive away angrily needless to say they didn't come inside for their freebie is it evil that I am delighted that these people have to suffer through choosing beggars because it means more entertaining stories for me if I wish for more choosing beggars out in the world because it gives me more content that make me like a supervillain can I get a shout out I do not give shout outs unfortunately oh that's okay bro and I think I'm subbed please shout me out I'm doing real bad right now for my channel I do not give shout outs unfortunately please I do not give shout outs unfortunately are you up bot no I gave you the same answer twice and you're still begging begging for a shout-out is rude if your channel is not doing well you need to fix something with your content it's your channel nobody is just gonna serve you subs and views just like that G please you're helping me what's wrong I just need help to get on my feet you're rude for not helping I mean I'm not begging it's really asking I just need to get up and if I do I'll shut the Freak up you are rude for acting entitled to get things just by asking for it especially when you've done nothing to earn it go on our /nu tubers on reddit to learn how this works not jerk I'll just get on your channel and your subs smiley face I said shout out now it's your channel I know somebody that hacked so smiley face on that note I should shout out one of my viewers let me hear down from the comments why you really really really deserve my shout out and I will give a shout out to the best choosing beggar post that was our slash choosing beggars and this is our slash puppy bloopers I'm sorry but I don't know you the dog has been mined for five days now you go you got opinions oh come on don't be such a you go censoring the bad words for me oh you go why'd you go the background is DMC the world's you go the background is DMC the world's leading man you you go are you the world's leading manufacturer of squeaks you go you go boy

Channel: rSlash

Views: 1,229,135

Rating: 4.9338908 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, funniest posts, funny, comedy, funniest reddit posts, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, choosingbeggars, beggar, r/choosingbeggars, choosing beggar, choosing

Id: 52K8P1CqUGk

Length: 15min 28sec (928 seconds)

Published: Tue Apr 16 2019