r/Holup | WATCH OUT

after seeing the earth from the moon neil armstrong said it changed his perception of humanity before there were arbitrary divisions and strife but afterwards he only saw one people all losers who hadn't been on the moon ever you're all less than hello you super special snowmobile welcome back to mk i am the jax and you are the backs welcome to the backs you thanks for coming by hello you are here to enjoy the good fun funs supplied by the ever so fruitful hold up subreddit so sit your booty down and relax it's time to collectively enjoy the nonsensical technically there is nothing foxy about them not to sound politically unaware but did you guys know fox news has absolutely no news about foxes same with bbc news wait that's why i get my news from the hut it's only the legitimate source of news not bias there my dad once said do what you hate first thing in the morning to get it out of the way then two months later called me on my birthday at 6am bad choice of words dad mum leave the damn sign in the kitchen where it belongs what sign you might ask oh just this one you only live once lick the bowl no how uplifting and wholesome where where'd he put oh at least put it there what's something that feels british but isn't gee i don't know maybe the contents of the british museum yesterday i finally achieved what every single college student in america has dreamed of yet can only hope will happen to them that's right i got run over by a bus on campus hammer make it rain on these degrees you get compensation handouts you get compensation handouts you all get compensation handouts vegan once mistakenly ate burger got hooked onto meat and became professional butcher that oh i bet the vegan activists hate her you were supposed to destroy the sith not join them be sure to try our vegan options uh just so you guys know feta cheese is not vegan might want to look into that yeah we really don't care finally a business that's honest elon musk just announced that tesla cars will soon be able to connect to each other via bluetooth allowing drivers to communicate and speak with other tesla drivers nearby oh boy road rage about to be like a call of duty lobby i can think of so many things wrong with this in america news six flags to reopen all amusement parks for 2021. i can't wait this will be my first time going so excited oh that's lovely to hear we can't wait to have you come along i went to report the video but there is no option for cringe so i just picked terrorism in high school i was placed in the english bottom class where a teacher said to my face i'd never make it as a rider well today 25 years later after unaccountable knockbacks from almost every publisher i'm ecstatic to finally be able to announce that that teacher has died hashtag never give up in 1920 eight-year-old samuel rashevsky played chess with several chess masters at once he lost every single game the boy genius who sucks the perfect advertisement doesn't exist j-rex see this is why you don't buy the white version of anything nigerian princess were real all this time 43 million dollars in cash found an empty nigerian apartment a poor guy probably spent the past decade trying to share it but no one ever replied to his email thank you for the solemn words nuk fuggots law professor you're currently failing your ethics class me slides at 20 across the desk how about now this is literally what i'm talking about 2020 oh worst year ever meanwhile in 1349 screw you pearl yeah you suck 2023. oh i missed 2020. meanwhile in 2142 i've got nothing it's just a sad reality i guess we're all going to face hey if you're not gay my friend thinks you're cute here's her number and if you are gay here's mine who are you and how did you pick up two people at the same time freaking win and win a chicken dinner if this guy's bi people who stay up late are more likely to die early finally some good news well it's not the warmest coat but it looks great yeah looks like he froze to death yeah frick he looks great though yeah see how the stitching complements his shoulders yeah yeah that's like that's that's top quality there we should just pin all the debt in the world to one guy and then kill him i think you just invented christianity yeah well never before have i seen a perfect link to jesus she's a keeper hey sweetie i'm at work dinner is on the stove you only have to light it the gas is already turned on love you see any man who says that women belong in the kitchen this is you create this opportunity seriously man you should be scared of your own sexist views i'm just saying forget fake ids teens are dressing up as mask wearing grandmas to score alcohol okay i guarantee there's probably like maybe two people in the world actually doing this regardless it is a very impressive and look honestly if i was a police officer i would i would give them praise that's creative but uh unhealthy i'm not advocating underage drinking public reminder that alcohol stays in your system for about a month on energy to your liver still developing it and also your brain doesn't finish developing until the age of 25 so really you shouldn't be drinking knuckle until you're 25 anyway i'm gonna dress like a horse so i can get ketamine okay i changed my mind this is actually not a good idea to encourage when your dad dies and you have to act like you didn't just do a choreographed musical number called i just can't wait to be oh no oh i feel simple sadness even more now i feel so paranoid like everyone is out to get me you've got mail when you're using your phone camera as a mirror while shaving balls and see a bunch of likes floating on the screen oh [ __ ] whoa three thousand likes uh hey i should just go linked below to my only fair hi i'm paypal's virtual agent to get started simply ask me a question i am still learning so if i can help you i'll direct you to additional sources i got scammed well now i hope i've been helpful today you haven't i don't care about you it have been helpful towards me this has been great for my own self-amusement how i made it to 150k in trading one took a small loan of 300k for my dad two put it into high risk terrible coins three lost half got scared decided it was time to cash out four blocked my dad's number five net profit of 150k secured please pay for me it's not easy here her husband just entered and he is an army man we have a solution slowly come out singing the national anthem he's not allowed to move welcome to the laziest solution of ending racism they got rid of the indian and kept the land how american we should start referring to ages levels because i'm at level 43 sounds cooler than just being an old person okay uh my son died at level four noob hey be gentler on chinese takeout do the people my daddy shoots go to heaven they do if they haven't done anything wrong so a lot of them yes oh my god is that an actual quote oh simpsons you were ahead of your time forever stuck between wanting to look fit and wanting to fit five whole pizzas in my mouth hey oh my god so like what kind of toppings do you want on it you know remember in 36 years harry's american-born child will be able to run for president way to play the long game king george iii you'll be back like before i will fight the fight and cause some prediction of a royal family having an argument and fighting between each other and calls their part of the family to go to your country where my own blood will then grow up and take over yours someone said your name backwards is your angel name and mine is akir i just wanted to share that because i think it's pretty ugh can we please not do this to my future wife when i die i want you to mix my ashes in a bowl of chili from wendy's then eat it just so i can tear that butt up one more time what ernie ernie get off facebook hey there beautiful you single no oh really that's not what your 2017 taxes say don't move man this is an audit 69 today love you mom i really hope it's her birthday oh yeah my bae looked like rihanna you know you spelled bill cosby wrong bro what my mom thinks drug dealers look like what i actually look like hi how are you i wonder why they pulled him over probably a bit upset over his insensitive thoughts probably to suck his peepee i don't like people who take drugs not me either airport security for example ugh taking all the drugs i okay oh honey look at these poor orphans so many unfortunate children we'll take the rat you and me friday night i'll supply the mozzarella sticks and shrek you supply the condoms oh wrong number oh hell now this is the right number for extra cash consider robbing sex offenders their address is easy to find and they can't own guns modern problems require modern solutions oh wow it's you this is so cool damn it man be quiet they'll hear you there he is well done sweetie now let's go over to the next page to further eradicate his species yeah eugenics woman hates selfies and decides to photograph herself dead all over the world imagine if someone kills her and keeps posting the pictures i think it's very obvious when someone is dead i'm sure by the time you get even the distance between these two pictures uh there'll be a big difference in the coloration of her body yeah coloration's a word now get with it how we used to take selfies in the 90s you want more nudes i only have so many coins birthday fun times is having fun times to celebrate your parents having fun times yeah no i'm out of here kids that's no no all day this couple ran up to different batmans yelled son and then dropped to the floor tell me you're satan without telling me you're satan i see you two purposely causing suffering among others for your own amusement and i approve i love little kids that share too much information today a girl came in with her mom to order food and i told her i liked her dress she said thanks my mom stole it from target ladies and gentlemen we've sold sexism is there any difference between a man and a woman no they taste the same it finally happened the flight attendant asked is there a doctor on this flight and i left up and said yes did a tracheotomy at 30 000 feet with a razor blade and a ballpoint pen he didn't make it but the thrill was undeniable thinking of going to doctor school now if iron man was black who would you cast as tony stark robert downey jr first date so what do you do i'm currently trying to eliminate all cancers wow impressive then i'll move on to virgos message in a bottle we have been trying to reach you regarding your car's extended warranty whoa wow wow places megan markel should avoid right now number one ricky williams blames pot for his failed drug tests i got high and forgot i wasn't supposed to get high this quote will go down in history a ten-year-old girl asks her mom mommy how was i born the mother smiled and replied once upon a time me and your daddy decided to plant a wonderful little seed daddy put it in the earth and i took care of it every single day after a while the seeds started to grow more and more leaves and in a few months it turned into a beautiful healthy plant so we took the plant dried it smoked it and got so high that we forgot to wear a condom what you were never meant to exist my little turtle dove how do you wanna die not alone which is why i am studying to be a pilot when your partner tells you he or she cheated on you i know there is a temptation to ask with who resist it instead ask with whom speak good english no matter the circumstances deer population is controlled by releasing wolves into an area all problems should be solved that way too much pollution release wolves into factories dislike congress wolves want to lose weight that's right wolves i especially don't like how all of these are actually justifiable i want a viking funeral but i don't have a boat so chuck my corpse under some rich guy's yacht and set it on fire i mean it's not legal but it's not terrible ooh fanart's time today's work is by galaxy dog well bow wow to you what like spatial entity i say a lot of words that don't really know if i'm using them right here is that dapper drawing and you know what i like this purple tail coat if um if anyone knows where you can buy one like that let me know i want it seriously this fashion is the tits i i want this back as the norm okay well maybe in the winter when it's not so hot thank you once again for the artwork galaxy dog here have a treat and remember if you'd like to see your fan art in the next video be sure to post it in the mk subreddit now that is the end of today's goodies i hope you had a good one incoming generic request that you like this video and are subscribed otherwise we are going to not release your family remember kids these aren't threats their promises and anyway that is the end of things my name has been jack you have always been a lovely person to ramble at and i look forward to doing it again soon bye bye for now

Channel: EmKay

Views: 1,232,512

Keywords: reddit, r/, subreddit, best of reddit, r/ top posts, top posts, top posts of all time, reddit top posts, 100% True stories, reddit true stories, top all time, reddit posts, reddit stories, ask reddit, funny reddit, emkay, memes, Holup

Id: XbL-dlrEHGE

Length: 13min 0sec (780 seconds)

Published: Tue Apr 27 2021