Jay Larson | Wrong Number | Stand-Up Comedy

your cell phone rings you don't recognize the number what do you do ignore it send a voicemail yeah not this guy I answer it yeah exactly opportunity potential who knows who knows what it is the other day I was driving down the 405 traffic phone rings 911 New York I'm like I don't know the number I hit talk I go hello guy on the other line goes hey Bruce what's going on my name is J not Bruce so clearly I go nothing much man what's going on with you and he goes I'll tell you what's going on I just got an email about the budget it's supposed to be 15,000 now it's 10,000 I'd like to know what the hell's going on and I grabbed the steering wheels like all right [ __ ] focus focus right now your name is Bruce there's a budget it's 15,000 now it's ten no one's happy about it just go with it go with this I didn't know much I only knew what he told me so I just set it back and I go ten thousand it's supposed to be fifteen thousand euros yeah well I just got an email and now it's ten and I go hey I don't know to tell you man I'm on the road right now I haven't even seen the email and he goes are you behind this did you send it out like get them Bruce some attitude you know what I mean and I'm like no way I am taking that there's no way and I go listen bro the budget was fifteen thousand we had a couple extra expenditures and went up to 16 - I read dick got it down to 14-7 we had 300 to play with I called it 15 I sent it out he goes yeah well now it's ted stay focused stay focused I'm not even enjoying it you know what I mean I can't even laugh I have to stay and like literally in it I was just in it he goes did Larry okay this now he's throwing Larry at me yeah so I go listen I took it to Larry he said it look fine but I news my ass on the line so I ran up by Jennifer just in case she said it looked good I sent it out he goes yeah well no it's 10 and I was like this guy has no idea what's going on over there he hasn't talked to Larry he hasn't talked to Jennifer I just made her up clearly he is not spoken to Bruce he goes listen man what are we gonna do about this I go bro I'm on the road right now I haven't even seen the email why don't you call Larry check in with him see what's going on give me a call back literally like throwing the fishing line out be like please say yes because that phone call return is going to be amazing and he goes he goes listen why don't we wait till you get home you check the email you call Larry you call me back I go nah nah bro Larry knows way more about this than I do give him a call call me back he goes okay hangs up the phone to which I explode with euphoria because there's a small business in New York somewhere that's crumbling to the ground over $5,000 no one can find Bruce no one's talked to Larry and they don't know who the hell Jennifer I get home I'm so excited I call some friends tell them what happened I think to myself you know what I'm gonna save that guy's number give a call in a couple days check in touch base see where we're at save the number my phone under random guy he's a random guy I don't think about it a couple days past no big deal laying on the couch watching the game phone rings dining room table watching the game get up pick up the phone look down random guy and I think to myself random guy Oh monie random guy who the hell's random guy and I was like oh now I'm freaked out you know what I mean I'm in my house they know where I'm at these people's lives have been affected but this is Who I am you know what I mean I started this thing I'm gonna see it through to the end that's how I saw this put in my earbuds just get a little distance just get some distance you don't I mean I hit talk I go hello same guy goes hey Larry what's going on now he's calling me Larry he knows what's up but I'm not gonna cave you know what I mean and I go nothing much man what's going on with you and he goes listen I got us on conference call with Janelle and Marie like I'm backing down from Janelle and marimba so I go hey ladies welcome to the call as if to say welcome to the show here we go how long are we gonna live for how long do you want me to lie because I'm gonna go all the way Marie she takes the lead she goes hey Larry what time is it where you are and I look at the clock and it's 5:30 and they're a New York company so I go 838 they're like sprinkling more lies and like I can fool them I can fool them she goes really what's the weather like and I go weather's nice weather is nice she was really this doesn't sound like Larry and I go oh yeah who's his sound like and the guy who called both times he chirps and he's like sounds like gross that's my boy like he's gonna blow this case wide open and I go guys this isn't Larry in this in this isn't Bruce and she goes who is this and I was like I'm just some dude who had nothing better to do than to mess with you guys Murray did not like that she got pissed she started yelling me she's like we're a small business trying oh my god I know she's like you think this is a joke let me ask you something do you let me ask you something and she goes what and I go we'll we had with the budget [Applause]

Channel: Laugh Factory

Views: 12,591,732

Keywords: stand up, comedy, joke, comedian, comedy club, laugh factory, funny, hilarious, humor, Hollywood, Los Angeles, CA, Jay Larson, wrong number, phone, cell, business call prank, jay larson stand up, jay larson wrong number, jay larson conan, jay larson this is not happening, this is not happening, comedy central

Id: fFO0CkSiZfI

Length: 6min 29sec (389 seconds)

Published: Fri Aug 10 2012

Reddit Comments

[u/northernswagger]

I would definitely listen to more standup that was more story telling oriented like this one. Change of pace from traditional standup and just as enjoyable.

[u/SpareLiver]

Damnit, what happened with the budget?

[u/psychobreaker]

I swear I've seen this before somewhere possibly by someone else.

[u/_then]

Jay Larson and Ryan Sickler have a great podcast called the Crabfeast, check out on Toooozdees

[u/PM_ME_UR_GAPE_GIRL]

He has Dane cook's mannerisms. Willing to bet he is bostonian

[u/[deleted]]

I have a cousin that was notorious for doing this with wrong number calls. But he took it too far at times, like the time he convinced the caller that the person they were calling for passed away. I kid you not he stayed on that phone for over 40 minutes with this person pretending to grieve and cry with them. All I kept thinking is what the heck are they going to think when they see supposedly deceased person alive and well?

[u/JamStars_RogueCoyote]

FUCK THE CRAB FEAST! 5 Stars!

[u/lookitskeith]

My best wrong number ever ended with a blowjob.

[u/BonnerJamz21]

Fuck the Crabfeast.