I'M PIXEL PERFECT

what's up greg i hope you're having a great day welcome back to another episode of me saying the same line over and over trying to sound funny and then editing out all the bad takes so that i sound really put together and clever all right gang it's that time again i know it's been a while but today we are going to be watching another disney channel original movie this one is called pixel perfect i feel like i said this every time i do a disney channel movie review but i have never seen this movie before actually one of my friends suggested i make a video about this movie they said it was a lot like how to build a better boy which if you've seen that video you know i love and you know what after watching it i have to agree it is very similar to how to build a better boy except that this movie came out in 2004 like 17 years ago and you know what it is probably the most 2004 movie you'll ever see the music in this movie the actors in this movie it's got ricky ullman from fill of the future the wardrobe the book bags remember those book bags i remember really wanting one of those book bags when i was 10. so this movie is all about holograms the movie starts off with the main character roscoe he's using his dad's computer to make a cat hologram i guess his dad works at some hologram company and unbeknownst to the dad roscoe sneaks onto his computer from time to time to make his own little holograms and today he's made a cat roscoe's kind of the nerdy type because this is a disney channel movie and he's the main character and when he's not doing homework or making cat holograms he's helping his friend sam out with her band yes this movie is also about a band cause this is a disney channel movie and that's just what they're about every disney channel movie is about a bank i don't know if he's like their manager or if he just like helps them market themselves he goes to their shows and auditions and films them and sort of advocates for them one of the first scenes in the movie is sam's band auditioning to play at this uh club for kids and the owner of the club is not enjoying himself [Music] do you sing lead on all the songs uh pretty much yeah okay love put down the guitar let's see your move kind of a weird thing to say to a teenager the conflict of this movie starts because sam's band doesn't have the right image you know their music is good but sam is the lead singer and she doesn't know how to dance and for some reason the owner of this club really wants a band who can dance dabs strut show some personalities some presents donor this club kind of reminds me of john mullaney's impression of mick jagger [Music] sam gives dancing a shot but she's not good at it [Music] in fact she's so bad at dancing that the microphone gets [ __ ] up i don't know how that happens microphone's just like ah make her stop she's so rigid this movie is chock full of young adult movie tropes not just the nerdy main character not just the band but we've also got business dad he's always talking about business even when roscoe thinks he's talking to him he's actually talking to his bluetooth you see that's the problem how do you get past all those bugs we shipped them off to china what overnight every last one of them thanks for the help what why did my son run away like that what what do you want me to do what do you want me to talk to him at dinner oh nasty boy the thought of even of even saying one word to my son it's too much for business dad to handle that night after seeing sam's band get rejected and then after roscoe being rejected by his own father he goes up to his dad's hologram room and starts to hatch the perfect plan to get sam's band on the map i'll make the cat sing singing cat hologram just kidding he makes a girl he makes a a hologram of a human girl so using references of a bunch of famous women actors a bunch of pop singers he gets to work crafting the perfect lead singer that can sing and dance and put on a show it's a really good thing that roscoe's dad has so many pictures of famous women in his office i guess he he must have known that they would come in handy at some point i'm just not exactly sure why he had so many meanwhile since sam is feeling pretty down about her abilities as the lead singer the band is holding auditions for a new lead singer my life is a bad school lunch it ain't no sunday brunch yeah the auditions are going so bad that nobody's even singing at them they're looking for a new lead singer and nobody has sang yet one girl's doing slam poetry the other is irish dancing it's kind of weird i feel like they just should have had people there singing poorly it was kind of a weird writing decision to have people auditioning doing something not even related to what it is i mean i guess like slam poetry and dancing are close to singing but like you can't just go to an audition and do something close to what you're supposed to do right hi i'm danny i'm gonna be reading for the part of spider-man awesome let's see what you got okay what what is that i'm a spider yeah i can see that but it's spider-man you're supposed to be auditioning for spider-man yeah but this is like pretty close yeah i guess kinda but like this is not gonna help you get the parts it's supposed to be a lovable superhero who goes around like solving crimes and shooting web yeah out of my ass right no but just then this girl loretta shows up and don't tell the band but she's actually a hologram excuse me i'm here for the audition so they get all set up and immediately they're blown away all loretta does is like put her leg up in the air and the girl in back is like oh whoa okay hold on a second guys this might be the real deal this girl just put her leg in the air even if she does this for like three minutes and doesn't even sing this would still be pretty impressive but you know since she's a computer program and she's literally programmed to be perfect at singing and dancing she kills it [Applause] she does the most 2004 dance routine ever she ends it with a really long spin which everyone finds really impressive really long spin actually damn she spun for a while i do feel like roscoe could have gone in a little bit more on the dance moves like she's a hologram so she can do like literally anything she can defy physics i feel like it'd be cool if roscoe made her do some [ __ ] that's impossible for humans to do that way like other lead singers can't even compete on any level like this seemingly normal girl comes out of nowhere and she starts singing and she's like pretty good but then she like i don't know turns into an airplane or something that'd be sick but yeah whatever i guess her kind of long spin was cool too i don't think i caught your name loretta loretta modern well it's nice to meet you okay i feel like they could have tried a little bit harder on that falling sequence she tripped because she stepped on a cable not like she tripped over the cable she just stepped on it and i guess that threw her off her balance so much that she'd like just collapsed so nice to meet you by the way oh who put this [ __ ] death trap here you're no lead singer my father's been working on holographic technology and artificial intelligence for sky graph he just hasn't applied it to the human form wait i'm sorry he hasn't applied his dad who works at the hologram place hasn't even applied this to the human form yet and somehow roscoe made this overnight just in one night he just kind of cranked out a girl before we get too far into this there's a lot about the technology of this movie that quite frankly does not make any sense to me i feel like it's just totally nonsensical like they could have explained it better by just being like it's magic actually and it's happened so much throughout this movie that it's almost to the point where like i don't even want to bring it up because i feel like it'll just be annoying for me to keep harping on this almost though it's almost there i will continue to harp on it so how did roscoe make a perfectly functioning human in one night this is something that like scientists have been trying to crack for decades like an artificial intelligence that can compete with like a human intellect and expression and stuff like that and rosco would just kind of got sad because his dad didn't talk to him one night and was like [ __ ] it i'm gonna have to put i'm gonna have to end these scientists whole career i guess boom human she looks photo realistic she can speak english and she can form sentences also i just kind of want to know like how this hologram thing works in general rosco can you tell us how this thing works the computer uses echolocation to measure the room and pulsing frequencies to hold her pattern oh okay but how does it work though like as in what the [ __ ] does any of that mean another thing that doesn't quite make sense to me is that loretta can't go outside which i guess makes sense for a hologram like if it's some sort of projector like the light just wouldn't show up as good outside so i understand that but in this scene she gets curious because she sees a bird's nest out the window and she sticks her hand out the window and her hand disappears but then when she brings it back in her hand is still gone and then roscoe says oh no i'm gonna have to rebuild that from scratch i don't have to build your new hand from scratch how does that work the hologram is just light right wouldn't it be like if you're watching et on a projector and you accidentally like turn the projector so it's pointing outside like that wouldn't delete et from existence if you just pointed the projector outside the movie et would still exist you wouldn't have to remake et from scratch if that happened because et is on the computer there should still be e.t there should still be hand that night we see roscoe painstakingly rebuilding loretta's hand from scratch and it looks like some pretty serious intense programming i mean just look at this click click click and it's done damn i guess that kind of explains how he was able to make a human so fast all he had to do was just like click on all the body parts and then he just made it all right danny let's develop this cure for alzheimer's and click okay that's congratulations you did it okay that was pretty easy roscoe gets the band their first gig with loretta and people are digging it loretta kills it dude the audience is loving it [Music] yo holy [ __ ] okay that was sick that was awesome now turn into a plane turn into a plane [Applause] oh the next day roscoe's doing an experiment where he's taking pictures of loretta to see if she can actually show up on camera or she'll just look like a tv screen kinda and bad news she just kind of looks like a tv screen she looks all like warbly with lines all in her and she's you can tell that she's not a real person when you look at pictures of her which sort of makes loretta start to have a little bit of an existential crisis she seems like she gets kind of sad that she's not real she'll never feel like human feelings why am i here the zetabytes need a new lead singer one thing that they did that i don't think that they needed to do was make loretta sound kind of like robotic when she talks do you like the rain i don't know it only happens outside i can't go outside cause when she's on stage she like sings exactly like a normal person would she's very expressive her voice has a lot of emotion in it but then for some reason the second she gets off stage she's just like this performance was at their high school and it went so well in fact that one of roscoe's friends tries to get roscoe to hook him up with loretta you got to set me up with loretta he wants to go on a date with her so bad that he threatens to have roscoe's dad fired hey too bad about your dad by the way my dad what happened to my dad between you and me my mom's been talking about jet damn's project not enough results why when i don't know i i could talk to her get him out of the penalty box that is do you help me i mean holy [ __ ] dude what a savage thing to do threaten to have someone's dad fired if you don't get one date with a pretty girl and also i have a sneaking suspicion that the mom wouldn't actually do this but holy [ __ ] what kind of weird-ass mom would that be imagine getting fired and you're like what did i do why i did everything you asked i created like a photorealistic hologram with impeccable art artificial intelligence this has so many implications what did i do wrong and your boss is like you did everything just fine unfortunately it was the boy your silly little son wouldn't let my darling boy go steady with his mysterious highly acrobatic friend i also forgot to mention that there is a bit of a love triangle going on here you see sam she kind of has a thing for roscoe and roscoe like maybe has a thing for sam beck but also just kind of wants to stay friends but then he's also created loretta the hologram who is like perfect in every way and it almost seems like roscoe is starting to fall for this hologram just like his friend apparently and this makes sam very jealous not too happy which causes her and loretta to have quite a few unpleasant interactions you don't know everything yes i do okay maybe you do but you don't understand any of it you could know what a baby is but you've never been one you can know every type of bicycle but you've never fallen off one and scraped your knee you could know every type of airplane but you still won't turn into one why won't you turn into an airplane it would be so sick she's not even real she's just a trick of light and you're nothing but water and a few pounds of chemicals oh maybe a few more pounds than you really need what oh my god dude this robot is so mean why would she be mean why would that be something that's programmed into her why is she programmed to do anything except sing and dance did roscoe program this hologram to be mean on purpose okay i've got a very limited amount of time i need to program this hologram to do everything that a pop star needs to do which should be pretty easy because pop stars really don't have to do that much all she's gonna have to do is she's gonna have to know how to sing and dance and be mean to me and be really mean to me degrade me [ __ ] make me feel like [ __ ] and embarrass me in front of all my friends that would be so hot or i mean that would be a really good pop star thing for her to do lord i am so sorry that's okay i've been enjoying the rain [Music] it must be wonderful what to feel the rain oh man this is kind of sad too sad cause she knows she'll never be a human she'll never get to feel the rain on her skin she'll never get to feel any human emotions damn i would feel bad for her she wasn't so [ __ ] mean you are so mean loretta and also you are a robot with no emotion so you're probably not even actually sad and touching rain is not even that fun so pick something else to be jealous about it the next day sam goes into roscoe's dad's office and finds some stuff that uh she doesn't really like save me please save me please what was that screensaver they just glo they glossed over that so fast the screensaver on their computer is rosco as a spider eating his dad who's a little fly on his web and then when it cuts away from the computer you hear roscoe's dead get eaten i'm so confused about that whose computer is this i'm pretty sure it's it's roscoe's dad right did roscoe make a screensaver of him murdering his dad does roscoe's dad see his son as a threat is one of them auditioning for spider-man i'm so confused some gene pool roscoe gave you [Music] so in a lot of ways this movie is similar to how to build a better boy because in that one just like in this one they design like the perfect specimen the perfect boy or the perfect girl but for some reason this movie the way that they do it seems a lot creepier i feel like like instead of what they do and how to build a better boy where they just sort of like list vague characteristics they want the boy to have like this color hair or this color i roscoe is actually like taking body parts from different real women and like cobbling them together into a perfect lady i feel like there's definitely a difference between like huh i just love a man with brown eyes and being like i will create a female with your skin and your toes this was like sort of a plot point earlier but roscoe didn't want his dad to find out about the hologram he didn't want him to know that he was using it to make this pop star so why did he just like hide all of these pictures on the desk where his dad works he just had all of the pictures stuffed in this manila folder right next to the computer hey son are you by any chance using my computer to make a human woman hologram huh what no are you sure because i found this manila folder at my computer that has like a bunch of pictures of blonde women in it with circles around different parts of their body oh oh yeah that's just uh that was just homework for math they're making you study white women in math class yeah it's part of the pythagorean theorem there's notes on a lot of these pictures this one says this chin will go great on my hologram oh wait oh those pictures oh that sounds so surprised those are those are from my cat holograms so this human woman's chin is gonna go on your cat hologram yes dad actually it is is that so hard to believe i want my cat to look good okay i want him to have a nice chin a nice ladylike human chin in fact i'm pretty sure i've told you all this before actually but you were so busy on your work phone that you must not have heard me you know all you do is work do you know that you never pay attention to me or my cat son you never held me as a child dad you were always too busy working i don't think you've ever even hugged me you know what son you're right i've been too distracted with work you know what let me drop everything i'm doing right now and let's do something together father and son how about we work on this human chinned cat you've been working on wow do you really mean it i sure do son also i saw that screensaver you made of you eating me and i'm kind of worried you're planning to murder me in my sleep i was you know what buddy bring it in let's have a hug i'd love to what the hell dad you're a hologram um what no i just have weakness dad i'm not dumb no really dude i just have weak baby knees i swear to god i wouldn't play about this type of [ __ ] dad dad it's okay i don't care if you're a hologram all right you're still my dad now come on let's forget all about i'm sorry this is too awkward i gotta go what go where what dad dad [Music] hell yeah dude i told you it'd be sick if they turned into airplanes we get to see loretta and the band performing again this time they're singing a kind of a sad song about wishing a boy would notice them which you know is kind of thematically relevant [Music] [Applause] [Music] she ends the performance with a double backflip off of a stool the flips are honestly one of my favorite parts of this movie they're so over the top especially in this performance they're so out of place like this song is a sad song about being like oh my crush will never notice me and then she just does like this impossible feat of acrobatics it does not fit the vibe of the song at all actually during this performance though there's like news trucks outside because they're so excited about loretta or whatever and one of the satellites on the news truck falls and i guess points at loretta which interferes with her signal and then it starts playing the news on her which is pretty silly i like that that's a that's a funny little thing to have happen i am confused though because if we're to believe how they explained the technology before this should be permanent now that loretta is like this because if when she lost her hand before it stayed lost now she is the newsman for a second so she should be the newsman forever now right isn't that how this works then they get discovered by a talent agent mr charles it's me daryl oh you must have found something if you're going so late only uh hearthstone's next media sensation listen to this this sounds like [ __ ] it's just people cheering it's not even music since this little bit of interference happens though it makes everyone realize that loretta is a hologram which people didn't know before and from there loretta blows up dude everyone's obsessed with her they get discovered by this talent agent she ends up on tv which apparently is okay she can be on tv i don't know why they had the scene of roscoe taking pictures of her before if they were just gonna throw that whole bit out the window because she is on tv now and she looks fine and everything seems like it's going great for loretta in the band and they even start to record an album take a good look because that is the future of the music industry a month from now every teenager in america is going to want to be just like her smart talented high resolution album title that actor looked like he wasn't paying attention at all until it was his turn to say a line he looked like he was just like spaced out until it was his turn to say something clever take care of my girl roscoe your girl your girl then there's this whole scene where loretta and roscoe have a big argument you always want to change me why am i never good enough for you and it ends with her getting so mad that she she uploads herself to the net she straight up goes into the world wide web and she's gone and then roscoe can't find her inside the internet it is very weird that whole scene is like a fever dream there's a search engine that's just like a guy in a car going around okay so now we're starting to approach the end of the movie the band has a big show coming up but they still can't find loretta cause she's busy in the nether [Music] so they dress sam up as loretta to be the lead singer for some reason no one really seems to [Music] notice but sam gets a little too carried away with the dance moves and ends up dancing her way into a coma [Music] damn i guess the microphone from earlier was right she really did suck at dancing the end of the movie is so strange loretta finally shows up after being gone for a while she sees that sam is in a coma and she sees that there's wires attached to her brain because they're monitoring her and she says wait a minute i can fix sam i can just go into her brain and fix the coma loretta no it's not a computer if you go in there you can't come out throw it no and she ends up going in there and then taking over sam's mind she's waking up hi roscoe loretta super creepy concept and makes loretta seem like evil oh my god sam you're okay i'm alive this movie kind of turns into like a horror movie for a second even when loretta is in sam's mind it's all dark and scary and sam is in there she's all sad i guess that's why she's in a coma she's too sad in her brain i don't know if that's how they think comas work the doctor's just like unfortunately her fall made her a little bit too sad inside her brain so she can't come out now it turns out loretta just wanted to go and touch the rain in sam's body and then she gives her body back to sam and then that's kind of the end of the movie sam is back she's happy they're all free to go back to their normal lives except loretta who never came back out of sam's brain and so like we're not really sure where she is and then she shows up at the very end looking like a force ghost from star wars anyway that's the end of the movie so now it's time to talk about our sponsor current but unfortunately i'm a little busy today so i can't do the ad read but lucky for you guys i just finished developing my first hologram his name is tiny danny and he's gonna be doing the ad read for me so uh tiny danny how about you tell these folks about current hey guys i'm tiny danny i'm a little hologram that's just like danny except i'm tiny no bigger than a little tiny little stick a gun but unlike other holograms you might have seen i wasn't programmed to argue or be mean or even to sing and dance but i was programmed to know a good opportunity when i see one that's why i'm so excited that this video is sponsored by current because current is giving you guys the opportunity to win 500 if you don't know what current is it's banking entirely on your phone you can get paid request money send money to friends you also get a visa debit card this is mine or rather this is a an exact replica of danny's because i am a hologram so this is also a hologram but they're the real one looks just like this and one of my favorite things about current sponsorships is it means we get to give back to you like i said they are also going to be giving away 500 to 10 people and here's how you can win all you have to do is sign up for current using my link that's current.com tiny danny then you find me on current my username is just at danny gonzalez and you request 500 from me that's it that's all you got to do seems like pretty much a win-win to me it's free and you can win money so why not so thank you to current again for sponsoring this video and thank you to you guys for checking out current and now i have to go stick my head out a window thus decapitating myself back to you dude thanks tiny danny all right guys well i hope you enjoyed this video if you're new here and you're not subscribed yet make sure you subscribe and turn on my notifications to join greg greg is what i call my fan base here on youtube but it's more than just a fan base you know it's a family and it is an army so keep that in mind when you hit the subscribe button and the notification button you are technically and legally joining an army but i mean we probably won't go to war against anyone but don't worry about that most greg's have never even seen combat yet so if you want to join greg just subscribe and turn on my notifications and i will see you guys and next time bye bye this video is over now over now go find something else to watch or just watch this video i know we had a lot of fun a lot of fun but you can't stay on this end screen forever this video is over now over now so why are you still watching this

Channel: Danny Gonzalez

Views: 2,680,167

Rating: 4.9823399 out of 5

Keywords: danny gonzalez, funny, commentary, comedy, react, reaction, reacting, awful, humor

Id: QBZHTAa7vfM

Length: 26min 2sec (1562 seconds)

Published: Sun Jul 25 2021