I made terrible decisions and ruined a kingdom

hey there friends how's it going my name is kevin and today we are playing reigns which puts me in charge of the people ah god i shouldn't even be in charge of myself so how this works is it's essentially tinder except if you swipe wrong people die or if you swipe right people could die also basically it's like tinder but everyone's dying so are you the young king does this mean like do i want to be king or it doesn't mean do i want to be young because i do not want to be young no i only talk to the king if you're not the king i'm going back to sleep actually i am the king so you're the one who you start my throne and send me this dungeon to rock no i'm not the king that that's not me that's someone else just try to keep a balance between the four powers to keep your head on its shoulders okay so i need to balance them all i guess keep god happy the people happy the army happy and the almighty dollar happy okay so we're neutral across the whole thing the eastern baronies are regrouping under the banner of a terrible warlord i think you might have heard about me i'm just gonna say no i'm not sending the army a young woman claims their son is in fact your best should we make this problem disappear yes when this kid wants to sing me a song that's an easy decision do you take requests at all a poor fool was singing along a sad a very sad song this is just depressing dude they're coordinating an attack ask for help no then we'll appear weak your people are famished and unrest is spreading both of them are just what i don't know what most of those words even mean the castle is ransacked your court disperses in your life from pigeons to rule over i think i got to make like six decisions and i destroyed the kingdom the king is dead yeah five years oh that's not very good oh so i play as the new king now wait what is this i don't like boone he's a whimpering liar you're right i don't know what boon is we need to build a new church what do we have enough churches what about like uh a temple to me instead all right i'm one full military this time i'd like to conduct a mass to the memory of your father no he was an idiot i know it was me that was a lion you bought it with great satisfaction what i'm just gonna say no you were wrong or good people are gathering every friday to sing songs well that's just fantastic yes cult of personality they're afraid of you in your army oh i thought they liked me i don't want to rule out a fear just want to be liked you know what just roll with it they should be afraid oh my god i just got a lot of new cards your people are famished and unrest is spreading why the castle is right side oh my god i've lost the kingdom twice in about five minutes all right harry the third king when the two will recruit the doctor meet the devil uh it's been a while coming i'm gambling with the kingdom's money i come on i know you can do better yeah just keep raising you have to bet the treasure i raise you oh my god all the kingdom's money is gone oh please let me win you want oh thank goodness oh look at all that money for the kingdom how did the jester have that much money your country is so rich we're throwing a party to celebrate with the most expensive food wait hold on now hold on maybe don't spend all that money we didn't get all this money by having like a thriving economy or anything i wanted playing dice maybe we shouldn't spend it all wait what a huge cast of strong ale was brought into the castle too drunk you fell in during the party how was that my fault he was ruling for a year he's the only one who did something good granted by chance and he dies immediately all right maybe king william will meet the devil well the other guy met the devil too but in a different way what large threatening gesture directed at you what i don't know what he's trying to say he says that your country is beautiful he would like to call it oh oh stop it you sure looking sad and depressed oh let's comfort him he points at his face what he says that the mouse is orange i'm beginning to believe you can't translate him if you don't believe me i will let you deal with him alone should i go yes get out of here oh no oh the people didn't like that you had a long and unintelligible chat with pran the fierce that ended up with good laughs the following day the eastern berenice tried to invade your country again wha why i thought we had something that cuddle meant a lot to me i i keep letting my people stare and i don't even mean to i don't know how this is happening king william was the worst king of our generation and there's been a lot of bad ones there are too many people to execute i need help from the army yeah go for it an explosion 100 dead should we keep digging yeah dude you're gonna need to build a big grave after all that unfortunately a great fire is destroying your castle no i destroy my castle save the treasury though we need the money i want to play dice again once again we're dead i died on the throne why do they keep putting me in charge the mines are full of gold this is great news look how happy everyone is oh my god this is the best king yet what's my name james king james wise recruit the doctor oh yes finally i feel like i need someone who's anyway smart and surely a doctor would be smart this is a cool surrender powered me at once what i the army locks you up in the tallest tower of the castle where he will decay to rags but what did i make the army too strong i did too good of a job all right okay okay that's fine all right fine that's brand do i get to be you now oh no harry's back wait which was the harry the first oh my god harry the first did not do good but you know what harry you've got a low bar now you can do this oh dice again keep raising just like the previous harry oh no oh no we lost all the kingdoms money on dice your country's ruined my lord merchants nobility own everything no the jester owns everything he beat me a dice once again the king harry lasts for one year both lost to the tragic tragic game of dice do you need credit yes give me a loan fantastic my 20th birthday god it's amazing i even lived this long wait the doctor just came in he has done nothing for us now he wants to hang out with his friends yet go for it get lost a dog you can have whatever you want i agree oh it's they didn't like that the church doesn't like that i'm listening to a dog our soldiers were overzealous now we're both at war with the south and the west nice no i think bring back the army the pilgrimage of saint armand draws thousands of people we would like to monetize this event you have a future in content creation my friend could we dismember guy brush oh that's the guy who took my my money from dice yeah kill him rex moans in despair oh my god i trust rex's judgment or everyone what's wrong rex is someone stuck in the well wait what time has gone space insane here it comes here again you feel your mouth closing down as if you never had one this will affect every year what does this mean little king little puppet wait was rex the devil all along oh no oh no it went down a lot the religion is gone oh my god everything is emptying is this like a hallucination if i got mad centuries ago you asked for eternal power in exchange for your soul did i i don't remember that each of your deaths is enjoyable well i'm glad someone's enjoying it but even more so is the choice i will let you make now go little puppet and see you again in 666 years okay that was interesting wait new cards devious curse the next character you say yes you will die oh fantastic oh and i even want to do that one the fencing but like if i do it then he'll die wait that might be good then i might win the fencing yeah let's do fencing you look like a reckless worm trying to fight needle yeah well you're cursed to die now do i attack i'm gonna attack yes oh um i won i thought i killed him there for a second beginner's luck do you want to know how to improve yes god damn it come on die he didn't even die what is that about wait i said yes to the next guy and i think he died a body was found later that year horrifyingly tore and bloated yeah i killed him i was trying to kill the other dude we need to reform her religion can you worship me this cake no i i'm not eating that cake that's going to be poison 100 teach me a way to tempt fate yeah go for it this will have effect every year load of dice you will never lose again at the red dwarf oh my god where's that gesture i want to play dice now a bird who's in charge of this word well no one answered me he just flew away maybe i am just a mad king i just pointed at a random bird like who owns this guy wait i'm bleeding oh my god get that doctor finally you can do something cut off my arm not a very good doctor are you where did you go to medical school don't believe the black bird it's all fake news what who wants this bird honestly he's spreading propaganda oh no the other bird is saying the other birds evil ah this is confusing i'm not getting in the middle of this fight just fine honest yourselves only one bird can remain i need me i don't know how much the other one i don't know i what am i doing i'm a serial killer me too are you trying to relate to me you're my executioner this job sucks if i could what what do you want to do what no finish your thought god damn it islanders are preparing invasion of the kingdom send the army the army was mobilized against an enemy damn it i killed the wrong bird oh my god he's saying it again no i'm not listening to you the doctor wants to be the executioner well you'd be a very bad doctor in that case don't you have like an oath or something i'm looking for a simple way to test exotic new poisons i can pay ah sure why not then oh the people didn't like that at all oh a terrible plague follows the doctor's experiments on convicts you're among the first to rock he had a long life how long did he live 38 years oh my god good job everyone lose yourself in the dungeon try the blue one have an air i want an air wait am i fighting a dragon i got burned to that by a dragon some of them just don't live very long in a year there's so many rulers that have just lasted a year it's got a higher turnover than the defense against the dark arts teacher oh he wants to turn lead into gold all right i know last time you got me killed after 38 years of prosperous king kingness but i'm gonna say yes the people are rebelling against the last vestiges of the church you have to escape what a pagan mob murdered you why i don't understand like they hate the church not me the people liked me the army liked me we we discovered the entrance from a crypt under the castle i'm going in i have so many like denna ancestors in there oh my god it's like a an adventure like a text adventure a used arsenic door arsenic door use that one the skeleton cries are last seriously cries or laughs do we just not know what kind of laugh or cry does he have attack yes he's destroyed new move tricky weasel a treasure chest i hope it's dice ah it's just a key but there could be a key to a box of dice a trap is triggered i just say what i don't react take my hand oh perfect you need to grab his hand why is he even down here i followed you there's a whiff of luck around you that is quite irresistible okay my luck saved me yes let's just say yes to him wait wait i'm on the other side now hold on oh my god this is a hell of a fight i have apples why would he say that attack what oh no i got killed by a skeleton new move cheating pig why couldn't i cheat there oh i had so much cool stuff as well i had dice it'll find me and just be like what the hell was he doing down here why was he wandering around in the dungeons fighting skeletons victory the vikings are defeated uh let them go no pity execute i curse you for the massacre of my soldiers you look funny i like your hat you're my slave now my god oh my god the castle oh my god people hate me they hate me no they hate william they don't hate me they hate william i'm fine now edward on the other hand they love edward oh what's gonna happen here are all these people embassies in neighboring countries i should go for it lad the hospital will limit the consequence of epidemics and catastrophes there we go i built the hospital don't say i never did anything he wants a hug oh i don't know i i don't really want the commitment and he he doesn't seem very trustworthy he's betrayed me in the past okay he's also dead how many kings have i lost one two three four five six seven eight nine 10 11 12 13 kings i've gone through well luckily 13 is a very lucky number so this one should go well i'm ignoring this bird i do not care about him he's he's lied to me once and i just will not trust him ever again a young princess being held against her will in darha castle i'm coming this is my opportunity shrek from the hit movie shrek 1 breathing fire are you the king are you here for the damsel uh no why not she's a pretty girl uh please don't burn me oh wait wait what it's just giving her to me okay i mean that's easy nobody's killing anyone you're here for the girl here she is end of story okay my hero yeah i'm a hero now i feel like a bit of a hero a group of fanatics ransacked the hospital pretending only god can heal them through your holy touch that sounds right yeah sure i can do that master abram of aragon is conducting a godly experience i know i gave him permission a great fire is destroying my castle well call the fire department then not me you're governing like a loser how do i kill him no i just hear me out for a while who's gur oh guard i was like who is a girl kill him there we go forehead loose song was executed charlie afterwards with a name like loose tongue i guess i should have seen it coming but he's dead now i'm happy i found blue and brown mushrooms in the forest this blue one seems edible to even hire you but it does say try the blue one so i'll go for it just to get one of the goals you feel suddenly very happy then strange things start to happen oh no outside the road should carriages go oh the left of course why why has it gone so weird wait why are you a rabbit why is the pope a rabbit i'm confused is this why easter is all about rabbits and is the mushroom still affecting me what's going on your country's ruined my lord merchant's nobility earn it on everything please i don't i don't want to go everyone is animals and i i'm i'm tripping out you're tortured and your body's thrown to the dogs your name becomes an insult great let's say you call someone a robert oh my god the dog is back i'm just gonna agree with you all right don't be a robert this time the people are looking for a scapegoat they have killed the priest and the general well they found it then close the gates and the army oh let's just send the army yeah you'll be fine i got a spy new carrots insane whispers that's not good i am a child i hope it's mine yeah an heir finally who should be the godfather oh marilyn brando he did a great job i don't want the general or the priest is is the jester dead did we not replace him with anyone i'm gonna use some fun whisperer general iron off of dover is a salmon swimming do you have to talk in riddles just tell me directly what you're trying to say there we go i tortured some monks and they confessed their werewolves i didn't think they were but i was just rolling with it a giant is shaking the ground near pavalo pa pav pavo li i i'm a bad king if i don't even know who i'm ruling send your priest to help yes send a priest to deal with the giant if i've learned anything from skyrim the priests are about to be sent into orbit oh my god i have no money please don't anyone ask for any money not even pocket change oh wait no no it's over oh sake stop torturing your kings and throwing to the dogs every time you run out of pocket change jess the 16th king oh this will be my king a jester finally i'm the jester really though i've been the clown all along this werewolf guy opened a trendy tavern okay will you give me some money yeah you know what a furry tavern might not be a bad idea things are looking really depressing here a crypt i'm going in i need to get away from making decisions because i'm really bad at it yes i don't even understand the combat but all i know is i'm winning like most of the time kick the door oh my foot hurts okay bad idea kick it again it hurts even more third time lucky all right my f oh you know what i'm just gonna keep kicking it it's gonna go eventually okay i after 40 hits i'll just accept that my foot is now a mangled mess and that we're not getting in there turn around what i'm stuck in there oh maybe i should have kept kicking well turns out king jest was a bit of a joke after all luckily we're at a big event here and we got a new fresh king ready to tackle it my dear i'm dying i don't know why it's probably my fault please let me rest to my parents too kind of weird but yeah go take a nap oh someone's tweeting i'm not there i'm a shadow i want to be batman over here like i can see you what what's he built here he's building me a vase knock brilliant knock it over how dare you wha not you the doctor he found me and lamicas he didn't create me who are you come back with the frozen blood and i may answer brilliant not sure what that means should i freeze some blood should i execute somebody rex invites you to follow him oh so there is someone in the well i'm following that doggy he brings me to the forest somewhere secluded where no one can hear me scream stops in front of a bright orange mushroom you know i have nothing to lose just eat the thing oh my god i i got i got clarity i don't know precisely how my decisions affect the kingdom oh my god look at this i have numbers now i wish i knew what numbers meant okay so this is awesome now i know if i try and save the victims my kingdom will run out of money so let's leave those victims rot i can get by with that too much sugar my lord it will kill you i i started eating cake a while ago this time i was like f poison it's poison it's a good way to die oh my god you're a mighty leader i about your greatness if i say lower it would literally cause a revolt okay very kind to you my king i'm a child i'll give you a sun an heir finally i this this has unknown effects if i say i'm not that bothered it only lowers it a bit they'll go with that you're dying of pneumonia i haven't left the castle my whole life actually i just gotta say since i was in that uh dungeon you know that was someone else oh no wait i went outside to eat that mushroom once that was fun you're dying my own friend dying of the old age what an achievement this is nice look my kingdom's actually doing okay oh in the end you die mourned by all your subjects your name is praised your tomb becomes a shrine finally what i wanted ah to be worshiped like a god or play dice one or the other i either want to be worshipped like a god or i want to play dice but robert the mage why was he the mage maybe he believed he was a mage after eating those mushrooms he had the longest life by far it was a shame he died of old age oh wait james the decisive actually lived longer he just lived long enough to see himself become the villain unfortunately all right i want to get to that with james james you're up come on buddy if you could change your previous decision would you do it no cause i don't even remember what it was who's boon yeah he's a liar i don't even know who he is is that the bird because the bird's been lying a lot or not this guy again will i just cuddle him and hope it works out he's looking sad and depressed i'll comfort him he points to his face what are you trying to say he says that the mouse is orange i don't think you know what he's saying a way to learn happiness please no one in my family has ever been happy give it to me i can't give you happiness but maybe i can remove something that makes you unhappy oh my god one can escape the crown take the crown from me no one saw you again after that day only your crown remained oh my god we actually saved someone all right i'm gonna go with this as my last king king you know what i want to re-roll there we go okay he's dead william that's easier oh my god i gave one of my lords a bit of land and now he's starting his own little army oh my god okay surrendering good wait let me live and i will tell you where the bandit's treasure is you're not like a random npc in red dead redemption what are you talking about but you know what i do want to know where the treasure is he's apparently a very small treasure can i kill him now can we dismember him uh yes he he died okay why do i keep getting tortured and thrown to the dogs when i'm trying my best okay gerald is the last king okay we're gonna get to that spot and we're gonna see what it is a fat guy with a fake beard and a red coat is giving gifts to random children in the streets i mean it sounds weird when you put it like that but that's just santa claus either way executioner i'm getting so much money from spices it's just flying up we should create a central bank yes we have loads of money now the central bank protects you from bankruptcy you just have to create more money when you need it yes just keep printing more money what i was doing so well for the kingdom and then during the party someone started an archery game and it didn't end well for you i wasn't even playing i'm starting to think i'm either the most unlucky person in the world 22 times in a row or i'm just not good at this no it must be the unlucky factor the luck of the irish is a sarcastic saying we're just historically not very lucky i think we're going to end it there i hope you enjoyed my reign thank you very much for watching i appreciate you and i hope to see you next time bye for now

Channel: Call Me Kevin

Views: 700,602

Rating: 4.9720149 out of 5

Keywords: reigns gameplay, reigns, reigns game, reigns lets play, reigns dungeon, reigns funny, reigns funny moments, reigns decisions, reigns callmekevin, choice based, choice based game, king game

Id: BM445UkdHto

Length: 20min 2sec (1202 seconds)

Published: Sat Feb 06 2021