Everything Wrong With The Boss Baby In 15 Minutes Or Less

44 seconds of two logos culminating in this cutesy remake of the DreamWorks one which is apparently required for any of the recent releases survival of the fittest narration but you just took them off the grill movie wastes no time getting in a cheap pawn at the expense of logic some days I rescued my parents and other days I watched those [ __ ] die did you know that the triangle is the strongest shape found in nature somewhere Phil Jackson is solemnly notic three stories five hugs in my special song right god damn this kid is demanding these parents aren't happy they're clearly suffering from Stockholm Syndrome movie likely blows half of its budget on licensing one Beatles song they couldn't just bust out a Cyndi Lauper track or something can't imagine something like hold on my heart would have cost that much maybe two Snickers bars and a tube of Lube not sure where it came up with that offer but I have some very weird cravings how would you like to have a baby brother no thanks I'm enough mom looks like she's way too far along with the pregnancy to be asking the kid his thoughts now I was not prepared for the fact that there might be more ass shots in this movie than a Nicki Minaj video well his boss may be the only infant that's being openly assaulted by the baby maker gay already movie the last time I was this worried about an infant was The Hills Have Eyes if you're confused after six minutes of horror movie contraptions nightmare hallucinations and baby butt shots that you were not at the correct movie DreamWorks assures you that yes this is the SH you paid to see the toys starting their day without human involvement and the Randy Newman desk piano strokes should in no way whatsoever make you think of the Toy Story movies my parents always said that I had an overactive imagination in case the first five minutes of the film set in Tim's imagination didn't sell that point to you meet your new baby who apparently aged at least six months during the car ride home given the size of this little crook Jesus Christ in this movie grow more than five minutes without a naked baby shot what is the [ __ ] deal say naked he's weirdo parents not only took a picture of their naked children then printed it off but also framed that put it up on the wall this impossible milk carton impossibly holds enough milk to spill over tooms equally-sized cup in the previous shot Tim's dinner was clearly still on the table even after it went in his face in this shot it's nowhere to be found also we may be clearly [ __ ] with physics in this movie but it's asking me to believe an infant has equivalent strengths as a seven-year-old wears a suit finally the suit and briefcase are brought up but how could this not have been brought up on day one have his parents continued to do this because it's been at least several nights and the baby's taken over everything else so why would Tim expect this to happen also think seriously Tim's parents may be tired from all the babies but they seriously don't think to put the seven-year-old in bed even though it's not this phone that's ringing the kind of placement is this either it's not plugged in and in useless or the cord is running across the floor it's a clear tripping hazard movie takes a break from its own fascination with baby butts to dip its toes in good old-fashioned potty humor the boss you're a baby not only is this a roll credits moment I assume this is the latter half of a drunken exchange between studio execs that led to this ridiculous premise being made into a movie the average toddler spends what 45 hours a year on the potty time however when you have factored in all the diaper changing time this all probably balances out em too this goes on for some time can't ride a bike without training wheels even bears can ride a bike without training wheels citation needed also this ridiculously detailed dossier on Tim has all the information on it so why is the spot for teacher left blank you would never ask your parents for an old toy man the way this movie makes things materialize out of thin [ __ ] air everyone wants the hot new thing why doesn't boss baby just come clean about his plan it's not that complicated and you could actually use Tim's help if this movie set in the 80s or early 90s which is how it's being presented then there's no way Tim would know this line from Lord of the Rings considering that's not how it's said in the book the tape recorder survives this Timms actually seeing these babies through his green glasses so why have they all turned into ring like demons they're completely unsupervised by the parents that brought them here babies aren't getting as much love as we used to why all the babies have been drinking the same secret formula as boss baby so why don't they all have old voices like him boss baby presents a slide show while staring right into the light of the projector this baby's gonna have some vision in the future Stacy be back the notes I can't read what's it say why can't she read or write but boss baby can't is she not also in management and if that's true then why is she able to talk and understand what's going on so this type is seriously gonna be happening the rest of the movie isn't it hang on I gotta head to the liquor store cookies are for closers almost five and six-year-old Glengarry Glen Ross superfans just got a good laugh out of that line it's pretty clear these infants aren't old enough for solids yet so leaving those cookies out is borderline irresponsible what's up with the parents in this movie oh look the kids are finally getting along this little vignette does nothing to inform us what is reality versus fantasy it pisses me off that it's even included so the baby is dragging the seven year old by the back of his car but they're actually just playing my head hurts so [Music] all that did happen in reality I think actually cares also I guess these parents just quietly took the kids own with no repercussions on Tim's parents because the CHEO in the backyard is never mentioned again Tim forgets the blatant assault that Boss babies come in it for the last several minutes and thinks he can't get down some [ __ ] stairs Tim is enrolled in the elementary level of the Prometheus School of backing away from things Kenny now Andy can also teleport considering he was just in the front yard two seconds ago Templeton let's be reasonable Tim can just pick the [ __ ] baby up and restrain him in his swing I want the last three minutes of my life back really your parents are Lennon and McCartney huh all those five and six year old fans of The Beatles just got a good laugh out of that line no seriously this is the baby that coordinated and executed a backyard attack on Tim culminating in a miraculous appearance in the office but let's watch him struggle for several seconds to get up into this bed and more middle-management for the company then shouldn't he be called middle management baby how am I socket no it's for you to stop I'm not sucking I don't know it's big it's not where it's been this fire will take you just keep in mind this was dialogue written for a children's movie I mean if you only had the audio in this exchange you would assume this was from an Alec Baldwin sex tape or possibly a scene from The Getaway which was also pretty much an elf pulpit six date only with James Woods hanging out in the background welcome to baby corn boss baby pronounces this like baby core but if that was the case it should be spelled core this is baby core this is where babies come from where'd you think my parents told me that oh no it's disgusting first off Tim's parents told him all about sex and reproduction at seven years old also whatever Tim's parents did tell him it's certainly not distill a bull into a two-second whisper if Tim and the baby are Holograms fine do they need to take the elevator upper management he literally just said he was middle management I'm willing to go along with the fantasy elements of this movie even though we still don't know what's real and what's not but this type of just lazy my dad says those who can do and those who can't supervise hello Tim don't wander into a cliche off with this dude that speaks almost only in cliches we drink a super secret baby formula that keeps us babies forever then why the hell does some of you still sound like infants and some sound like a narrator in a Wes Anderson movie this pie chart is supposed to show the distribution of all the love in the world but only includes six items it also assumes that equal amounts of people love birds and fish as cats also where are hamsters snakes and sea monkeys I get that these are babies but they need to make some major changes in their Rd Department promotion the corner office movie keeps contradicting itself so I'll continue to point out that boss baby previously said the average toddler spends what 45 hours a year on the potty hot don't spare time make sense movie about a hyper-intelligent infant trying to infiltrate a puppy developer alleged is in two days yeah but besides having a meeting with the other babies what does boss baby done to get any information he's just been playing with Tim Oh take away my formula I will turn into a normal baby and live here forever with you but the formula was supposed to keep them babies while their brains continue to age right if they take away the formula boss baby's body should immediately change into Captain Ellerbe not revert to an actual baby I will help you but just to get rid of you deal well it's not really a deal considering both of those items or what boss baby wants but whatever I had a parent still so exhausted babies getting around on his own these days and the movie doesn't show them working particularly hard or at all becoming more and more evident these two are just oblivious [ __ ] we have to convince them that were actual brothers that we like know there are so many moments like these that drag on far too long and I'm certain the original script was for a 30-minute TV show damn it I have to point out again that earlier in the movie the boss baby was happily eating this with no issues I mean I'm happy to blurt out boss baby's baby joke but what's all the racket because we certainly don't give a flying [ __ ] about this baby and leave him alone for long stretches at a time Jim wake up buddy you're late for work doesn't Tim go to school even if part of this takes place over in his summer break the baby's been around for at least several months can the baby come too I don't see why not further confirming there [ __ ] nough sits now clear these parents haven't even named their second child yet boss baby only has one bottle in his safe so has he been getting his constant supply of super secret formula boy just take your kid to work day he looks a lot more like drop your kid off to do random carnival day surprise you know that movie has too many creepy moments when a weird-ass old man pulling out a baby's pacifier and exclaiming surprise doesn't even crack the top ten they replaced me with someone new someone younger this despite the fact that his replacement is the only baby at baby corp that doesn't look like a baby once I launched my forever puppies to every corner of the world no one will ever want a baby ever again children or men prequel is cleverly disguised as a boss baby movie I have a voice I told him to stay in the puppy zone let me imagine no tim has the worst parents ever because if not he does Eugene here won't take her eyes off your children not for one second Jesus once this movie finally decides to buscemi it boosts amis heart without that formula I turned into a normal baby even though I should turn into a pre Harrison Ford Jack Ryan doodle ooh toilet that's racist ah yes much faster to use the tiny wagon as a skateboard on grass than to actually run after this slowly moving bicycle Stacey not only does Stacey's mom not know the clearly visible antenna on her dinosaur tour she doesn't even hear a grown man's voice calling out to her infant daughter I think him okay does Eugene have superpowers because it'd be super nice to see this chase scene at least work within what passes for logic of the movie Jimbo when infant survives this Tim's parents had a huge head start and you know we're gonna in car you did it no we did it oh my you guys are having your ultra cliche moment your parents the primary reason you've just jumped over a moving train on a kid's bicycle are still motoring to the airport considering there's no late Tim's parents couldn't hear their child yelling for them from only a few feet away I'm convinced they're the main villains in this movie thank God I found Tim showed earlier that he knew how to use a telephone though right even if this is the 80s or early 90s he could still call their hotel and let them know what's coming on please stop acting like a baby baby this buddy's fight in an animated adventure cliche is so cliche that I might as well be watching the secret toy story of Shrek's also by the way nobody in this previously crowded airport is overhearing the seven-year-old loudly argue with the talking baby and nobody stops to check on the seven-year-old boy that's been sitting alone for the remainder of this day holy all the adults in this movie are [ __ ] I love Elvis where there's Elvis there's Vegas he goes for that current topical humor that all the kids these days know and love oh thank you very much sure they're going to the Elvis convention but why is the ticket taker who works for the airline also an Elvis impersonator this is first class why is it no one can afford it but apparently you can just walk on through the curtains and claim a seat completely unnoticed Oh kids he told us to sit here this works what airlines serves steak is an option to a baby and pony in oh wait Eugene not only also had time to pose as an Elvis impersonator he was on the entire flight with Tim and the baby and did nothing he's been sick where do you live sweetie while these gals were willing to help out a kid and his sick brother they were clearly going to keep the party going while they offered said help also the kiss the baby they thought was deathly ill [Music] sorry Tim you've seen too much in this movie to suddenly become excellent at cinemasins a likelihood of puppy Co having a space large enough to launch a rocket from the Las Vegas Convention Center is as high as GRU being able to build that giant lab underneath his residential neighborhood wait did I just work at ass pickle me burn into this boss baby movie you're damn right I did you could have had your parents love all to yourself again but no you blow it actually no they don't stop Francis's plan then boss baby is fired and Tim's parents would continue to raise him why the hell would Francis keep an open vat of the super secret formula out here should this be on the rocket with the puppies hmm this time we'll raise him right fun fact Eugene's last name is plot convenience yes Tim Moby continues its theme of making every adult clueless to their surroundings considering no one in the entirety of the Las Vegas Strip sees this happening you saved us you're our hero how the hell would they have known what was going on though they had no clue about Francis's plot or his background they were locked up in the box throughout the whole being rescued this letter should get you into the school of your choice so he's taking them off the formula and letting them grow up then but he's still their boss so they still work for baby Cort honestly this movie's logic is more confusing than Inception um stay in school how about go to school forget about the baby holy SH the cleanup babies that do this obliviate spell are the most terrifying parts of this movie also why did they give Tim the option of whether or not to be neuralyzed I know he was privy to the situation but shouldn't standard protocol be to wipe the siblings memory to DreamWorks must be desperate to get their own minions I guess the parents didn't have questions about what happened to Lam let him this idea could really blow up in his face but if he just ends up with some random family damn it movie just had to work in one more baby buckshot didn't you you need help look who's here it's your new baby yeah yeah but last time mom was actually pregnant this time she looks awful well sweetie that's how I remember it the whole movies aligned I mean maybe I mean definitely mm probably damn you unreliable narrator told me require I'm proud of you wisely back at you Lindsay even though Tim is seven years older than Ted it's the younger brother that sounds like the shadow and the older one that sounds like Peter Parker [Music] you that's my name [Music] animated boobies don't give a crap about healthy eating because I guess sweets make for better jokes or something boss baby is no different cookies pizza Chinese takeout not a healthy snack 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now it's a reality click the link in the description below to check it out and now the audio outtakes hey my door knock next time yes sir did you see anything no sir I didn't see you playing with your dolls again good cookies are for closers you think I'm with you I am NOT

Channel: CinemaSins

Views: 3,349,534

Rating: 4.8872414 out of 5

Keywords: boss baby trailer, wave jockey job, cinemasins boss baby, boss baby, film, cinema sins, movie mistakes, movie review, cinemasins, eww, everything wrong with, review, movie review mistakes, movie, boss baby full movie, everything wrong with boss baby, eww boss baby, boss baby review, boss baby reaction, boss baby sins, animation, animated movies, boss, baby, the boss baby, the boss baby full movie

Id: dXHzXxINNOE

Length: 16min 58sec (1018 seconds)

Published: Sat Jul 20 2019

Reddit Comments

[u/KingOfBuckets]

Fuck this movie

[u/Lol_u_ded]

Isn’t this a repost because it was taken down? And everything IS wrong with The Boss Baby.