Everything Wrong With Trolls In 18 Minutes Or Less

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[Music] [Applause] it's worth asking how long will Fox keep using the 20th century logo in the 21st century will they be watching a screener in 2345 and some intern will finally pipe up you know we really should update that and the studio heads will not quietly in collective realization nice try DreamWorks but you're not going to distract me from loading this 47 seconds of two logos why should pot of time yet another DreamWorks movie opens with a shot of a storybook and Once Upon a Time rip the only thing left to do to ensure brand loyalty is to now show a montage of a character doing disgusting Shrek style poo things wow these tools sure do look a lot like stitch from Disney's lilo and stay hey where'd all these lawyers come from bergens didn't know how to sing or dance or even hug sure these Bergen assholes are assholes but resorting to wedgies as a form of communication meaning at all made them feel so happy they started a tradition I'm not surprised trolls are apparently 40% hair and 60% pure MDMA once a year every year the Bergen would gather around the troll tree to taste happiness well I once a year if eating a troll mix the Bergin's feels so good wouldn't they be gobbling them up by the bushel you know there's a Bergen named Larry that's totally addicted to that and it's sneaking them off at a ziploc bag or something and binging at home [Music] in the hall of the Mountain King gets a hip-hop update and Edvard Grieg is popping and locking in his grave seriously the Virgin's eat trolls but they also have a doughnut shop doesn't that make them happy too how can you sadly eat a doughnut they're lighter fluid looks more like Nickelodeon slime than lighter fluid wait maybe that is Nickelodeon slime we just didn't know how flammable it was that really changes the tone of double dare this is a very special Roasters how do they feed the whole town with two tiny grills and the tiny trolls doesn't the happiness dissipate when they've divided up into parts also sure we're about to see some of the trolls escaped here but the bergens have been doing this for years we should probably pour one up for all those poor bastards who weren't around for Anna Kendrick to team up with Justin Timberlake and save the world with music as there is one amongst us who has never tasted a troll talking about me wait Prince gristle was less than a year old and he can ride trikes walk and talk with that kind of growth rate the older Bergin should be in wheelchairs by the time they're 25 it is my sacred duty to initiate you in the ways of true happiness Bergen or not this should be filed under the creepy things that should never be said to a child make me happy Bobby what the hell are the girls for then I think I hear something the trolls are making their escape right at the time of the troll stuff so you think they'd be a little quieter about it sighs and it's in and we already have our second underwear sight gag dreamworks you do you also if they're digging they would have picked up the axe and slung again but chef apparently thought this was good enough and called it a day it was this easy to escape the troll tree why didn't they do it long before now she's young i banished from bergen town forever i know king grizzle was looking for a scapegoat why is chef the one that's banished I mean she just cooks the trolls right she can't be the only one in town checking in with him on the regular she will never ever ever ever be happy meddler ever but there's a portrait right behind them of the king and Prince cheesing since the Prince hadn't had parole before either this painting was done today which is some both or they were previously happy this is where we will rebuild our civilization unless we've just had a massive time jump they couldn't be more than a day's walk from Bergen town given their tiny legs and the fact that many of them were slow during the escape I would think this new spot is about a half a mile from certain Bergen death it has everything we need fresh air clean water and sweet acoustic I half expected to hear Smash Mouth all-stars also a trolls movie in 2016 wait a straight while the iron is hot also also 7 minutes and 32 seconds into the movies when we get the title of the movie it's like 8 percent of the movie already and now every troll is free to be happy and live in perfect harmony my princesses always get stuck watching the village kids they didn't have anyone else who could read from the sacred book of exposition what the hell are these little things and not trolls and they weren't in the rescue party from 20 years ago so the troll race must have been slave trained and domesticated an entirely new species for transportation and acoustic drumming which is pretty goddamn gruesome okay I can buy that the trolls have functional photography in this universe but why does biggie have a suggested boudoir picture of his minion in a bikini something's missing we were almost at the 10-minute mark when I was where we weren't going to get any scatological humor in this cocoon thing I could hear you from a mile away if I can hear you so can the Bergen but they haven't the trolls have presumably been doing routines like this for 20 years with not one of those preparing them the targets are going ah hang on I thought trolls were always happy shouldn't their funeral be more like New Orleans wakes also a dump branch showing any advancement in age this clown troll worked at a party fell in love got married and then died also also thanks to a mortician for searing this nightmarish image of a clown cruel corpse into my head I don't do happy but why not as he's had a traumatic event is past but he's a troll controls seem to be genetically predisposed to happiness but branches all rebellious lee sad that's like a cow consciously deciding not to produce milk some folks just don't want to be happy right but they are folks they are a species of perpetually happy trolls so it seems that they shouldn't be as dismissive of his behavior they should treat him more like he's a psychopath interest but these poor trolls are stuck up in the air for the entirety of the party spinning and spinning instead of enjoying it with their friends below yeah yeah it's almost like this script was written by 47 year old dudes that we're forced to come up with how they think young Millennials talk looking hey it was just Lydia is basically the ant and the grasshopper fable but with glitter feces and clown corpses well they always capable of this glitter supernova and wouldn't they have tried a test of this before also poppy is overexcited but she's not an idiot right the music and noise is one thing but why would she authorized this obvious glitter flare within range of everyone nearby defeat also the king is right there at the party shouldn't he at least put a stop to this but dude's been through the scourge and escape from the Bergen since the beginning so the chef has been robed for the last twenty fifteen years but hasn't had a width of parole until now and she's right next to them she's pretty but I think this troll village is a little more Pandora than the filmmakers intended gotcha really moving can there not be one animated non Pixar movie that doesn't have that character poops when scared cliche I would say you're better than that but after previously watching this I know that not to be true so carry on I guess sakis hair somehow has the strength to tug firmly against chefs grasp even though chefs been picking up the other trolls by the hair until now chef has access to many other trolls that she just spent a little more time looking for them like you know she's been doing for the past 20 years branch decimated this invitation when poppy gave it to him but it's magically without a scratch here because we need a reason to like this character also grump secretly wants to join the fun cliche when we go to Bergen town with me and save everyone there are still like 30 trolls left in the village but poppy goes to the one dude that doesn't get along with anyone to ask for help you told me not just with a party and I threw it anyway it's not throwing the party that was the problem it was shooting fireworks in the air that basically said delicious trolls here it's my fault they were taken and now I don't know what to do why don't you try scrapbooking them the freedom Jesus this movie cast maybe the two most likable leads in the world but gave them such huge character flaws that's impossible to refer either of them hey any time poppy see in ten years branch clearly doesn't expect poppy or any of the troll to live that long poppy wasn't gone long enough to let everyone in which means they got through all the branches locks and traps meaning his bunker building skills are horse [Music] non-consensual hugging this journey to Bergen town is suddenly fraught with peril look just 20 years ago the king lit a bunch of slow-ass trolls out here in less than a day were there many more trolls that didn't make it during the trip that we don't know about also if this is how dangerous the jungle is then they may be safer with the Bergin's they just try and eat them once a year probably surprised us also I know most kids at this age won't be asking those questions yet but this is not the best way to be teaching them about reproduction poppies walk to Bergen town takes her through an acid rain storm a desert and a pink blizzard within the span of one day branch at coconut poppy hang on branch must've been following poppy throughout this journey right and if so he's casually watched her get threatened with fire eaten cooked into an egg and poison but chooses now to get concerned about her well-being you're a live branch you know it you don't know anything poppy and I can't wait to see the look on your face when you realize the world isn't all cupcakes and rainbows why did Branch come on this excursion then I know he wanted to get away from the hugging and singing a troll town but he could have gone anywhere else you don't stain your fan okay all the time that's graces I also like a little silence poppy decides to behave like a literal troll too poor branch also how would poppy a troll that only knows happiness know such a dark and foreboding song and where the hell if she could pack a car this whole time hey that's a boot and fast food litter and a car tire there he was here or there we're humans which is the more disturbing option so one of these tunnels lead to the troll tree I wonder which one this is information her dad could have given poppy as she was leaving instead of organizing a hug orgy one of these tunnels leads to the troll tree and the others to certain death yeah if it doesn't the troll tree also ensure certain death I mean that's where the trolls have been picked for Bergen food for many years really cleared up exactly what I will not be doing rich it's a high five the others lead to certain death yeah perspective for all her faults during this movie it's apparent poppy would be excellent at cinemasins shark-attack nom nom nom jellyfish and family Turkey Snowman Dolphin helicopter hat supper lucky to do what gearshift way too much of this sounds it can we hug movie continues to derive humor out of various characters soiling themselves in terror you're telling me there's only one forward restaurant in town but there are three non earth as appalled as I am to see a gorilla song used in a subpar movie I'm also wondering why the bergens would be sending this lyric I thought it was a matter of civic pride that they aren't happy yes miserable yeah which means they have any trauma so what you're saying is if you with them each rules then they will all be happy I would assume that will only make a few of them happy and the rest of them extremely resentful sad Todd first on how to Jeff get back into the city if she were banished there's a gate at the front of the city a huge ass door on the castle at least two guards here second what the hell took her so long branch and poppy had been on this journey for what seems like forever but a chef had a head start and a thousand percent more stride length she should have been here ages ago all these trolls have beautiful natural voices but there's always one asshole that has that Kanye I am their king what happened to the John Cleese version of the King it's been 20 years sure but young grifoll is under 21 at this point he couldn't have been Natalie and who knows how long the Bergen blip I want answers to these unimportant questions can what's your name Oh Ricky movie wastes almost 40 minutes getting to arguably the second most talented singer in the SCAF we must all remain calm especially since at least 3/4 of you could simply fit between the bars of the cage and just walk the hell out of here sorry baby he who controls the trolls controls the kingdom and I I am bhakti your adieu unusually transphobic humor for a modern children's movie in 2016 this super hair ability seems to come and go good and poppy have used it before the spider web scatter couldn't the captured trolls use it to open the cage while Shep isn't looking I would like this movie so much more quick with 30% more hair centric oh you think that's funny well she's laughing when I bite your yummy head off which I will not do right now even though I'm miserable when you're standing right in front of me ah oh my dad said the first time should be special the second fake out is long enough to remind me that even though it's only 81 minutes long this movie had to pad its runtime watching frozen your Roman guard them with your life chef gives an incredibly important job to a young Bergen she just met rather than taking the trolls with her in a fanny pack and bridget is dead there's a Bergen Beat Magazine who publishes it who writes the articles there's a cover story titled and misery but how the hell do they know how to do that and why does Bridget have to hide it anyway this is silly but to be fair it's only the second silliest video ever made for this alt poppy how could you possibly think Craig still alive well we've still got about 40 minutes left in this movie then we've heard creaks dead about 25 times so I'd say it's a real good book I suppose I told you I don't think amazingly talented character refuses to do the thing he's amazingly talented at cliche yeah why won't you think of singing killed my grandma okay why did his erstwhile you for trolls continue to sing depressing a song apparently all the fantasy characters in this fantasy movie grew up listening to the same 1980s human power ballads I just assumed you had a terrible voice no no it was like an angel at least that's what grandma used to say that's also what Lou Pearlman said at this point you could tell me I'm watching the movie sing and I would totally believe you don't you know anything about sarcasm I think I had a talk at once will be attempts to throw in a singular adult joke but it's so obvious that their punishments should be explaining the birds and bees to every child who saw this also this forces me to imagine at orgasm it's just the third or fourth time killing song montages movie has made me suffer through I lost count I'll just get my worthless scullery maid to get another place setting ready for the lovely lady mr. Spock gristle only introduced Bridget as his plus-one so the only way chef could know her name is if the screenwriters were committed to seeing Christine Baranski to the hell out of this long laptop to slow - what are we granting the reason for this emotional renaissance - branch sure he called the story about his singing getting his grandma murdered but it doesn't mean I'm sorry up stories so big stupid yes help me be ready glitter Sparkle Bridget should know that in order to do this there will obviously be no trolls to be served at ulfstead so either way she screwed and filmmakers really use the finest vintage technology and music for this workout montage between gristle working up at Donna summers I feel loved Bridget singing Lionel Richie solo branch singing Bonnie Tyler's total clip to the heart Kroll village singing Earth Wind and Fire September and cool in the gang celebration and branch and poppies Cyndi Lauper True Colors do it was anyone even thinking about the present day monster casually stops months during long enough for the trolls to assemble their escape device how does this gate being propelled exactly or steered I'm sick of writing them you're sick of hearing them but can we please rise above glitter scream or is that just where we are as a movie society you don't see that stuff in Manchester by the feet all the trolls survive this it can't be good sorry papi we're too late yet another fake out death for hippie troll Aldous snow seriously we're really supposed to feel anything for this character he's been on screen for like two minutes looks like trolls dis was traditionally held out by the troll tree as kind of a summer barbecue but now they're all headed to the castle which definitely doesn't look big enough to host the entire town let alone for a formal banquet now let's prepare the main car Hopi needs to pick us I'd be a bonkers fairy tale about a grim death for the protagonists or a light-hearted adventure for a pink Toyland are you being sarcastic Oh oh my god admit it you have expected this character to poop himself out of shock didn't you yes I wonder if a troll loses its colour does it still bring happiness to a burden that heats it probably not right so why didn't they just lose hope a long time ago and make it useless for them to eat them also aren't the cooks supposed to be preparing the main course pretty sure these trolls should be on a burner by this point and I see your true mm-hmm I've heard this is exactly what happens to women and many men for that matter when Justin Timberlake starts singing this is nice a branch to lift everyone's spirits and all but couldn't have gone with a song that's more of a plan style because as of now they're all still gonna die and now they're all happy so they're gonna be delicious for the next machina seriously these controls get amazingly lucky this whole movie this is like Forrest Gump Ian levels of luck I love you for that I love you too Bridget for no other reason this movie gives me except for convenience there will be no fro until the king app1 has arrived well unless she doesn't come at all but that's crazy talk who wouldn't want to be with you chef is acting like she's aware lady glitter sparkles isn't going to show up but has done nothing to make that happen or gain that knowledge we did just ruined her life to save ours it's not right that's partly true it's not right but they're actually probably going to kill her once again how the hell is escape repelling us out do you really think I can be happy of course it's inside you it's inside of all of us I got this feeling bad my bone and by inside you I mean this song will be stuck inside your head for the next three days also it's obvious this entire movie was just a setup for the song which was released six months before this movie came out in a cheap grab for the song of the summer in 2016 wait what was I talking about again got that good song I must see all these bergens are still hungry right it's the power of music that much more than the power of hunger because if it's 2 p.m. and I haven't eaten there's no song in the universe that's better than a Baconator how the did all these trolls get in here and we're already halfway through the escape tunnel and the primary characters were the only ones that crash through the window I stopped Bergen does her impression of your Aunt Linda when she hears this song at Donna's wedding reception all those cute happy little troll just murdered someone that's too adorbs hey Russell Brand roll remember him no yeah I think he charges by the minute and they've already blown their budget on Timberlake oh yeah but can he do that I mean he's still alive at all can she continue to be the leader as Princess feel like Daddy troll is getting a little caught up in the moment oh you think that's the end then you can finally escape this nightmare and get your kids to their dentist appointment now no there's three three minutes of b-roll troll singing credits to come [Music] well Papi's all sloppy how's the highway I got a fever and the only prescription it's more cowbell quick little errand there hmm that's juice high-five keeps asking me to give him a high-five I'm couldn't just even one high-five why don't you try and some positivity a little positivity might go with that best it's a labor of love [Music] in the movie trolls the Birkins eat controls every year in order to feel happy that's the only thing that makes them happy that's freaking sad listen I can end this movie's conflict in seconds the burden should sign up for naturebox that gives them tasty snacks they won't complain about and freeze the trolls from being Birkin dude yeah and if the bergen's over you were to go to naturebox.com/tyler MSN's you can get half off your first order which is literally 50% off the snacks are always rotating they replace anything you don't like for free literally what are you waiting for an engraved invitation my ally whether your tastes run from salty to savory to sweet naturebox has you covered and it's all healthy and good for you free of artificial colors and preservatives and all that crap denied just go to nature box calm [Music] [Applause] [Music] Nichola keep doing so look with nature box and you'll start snacking healthier by the day
Channel: CinemaSins
Views: 9,700,146
Rating: 4.813663 out of 5
Keywords: trolls, cinemasins, cinema sins, everything wrong with, eww, review, movie, film, mistakes
Channel Id: undefined
Length: 19min 36sec (1176 seconds)
Published: Thu Feb 23 2017
Reddit Comments

After watching this video, I can't decide if the movie is better or worse than I expected it to be, and I'm too scared to watch it for myself.

👍︎︎ 23 👤︎︎ u/Castriff 📅︎︎ Feb 23 2017 🗫︎ replies

My wife and kids loved this movie but as a whole I didn't care for it. The song about not giving up is pretty good but the other hour and a half did nothing for me.

I will say this, this movie convinced me that if the movie adaption of Wicked happens sometime soon they should cast Anna Kendrick as Glinda.

👍︎︎ 6 👤︎︎ u/[deleted] 📅︎︎ Feb 23 2017 🗫︎ replies

I adore this movie. It's not great by any means but I found it really enjoyable.

👍︎︎ 8 👤︎︎ u/boomkinburger 📅︎︎ Feb 23 2017 🗫︎ replies

This movie actually surpprised me. It wasn't that bad and had a nice tone. I do not mean tone as a song pun.

👍︎︎ 5 👤︎︎ u/triotone 📅︎︎ Feb 23 2017 🗫︎ replies

15:26 - They couldn't do one lyric without autotune? The fuck? I thought these people could actually sing. This is why I dropped out of audio engineering.

Jesus. I knew this movie would be bad, but I feel dirty watching this video. Too much evil. I need to bathe in goodness.

👍︎︎ 6 👤︎︎ u/symmec1ept 📅︎︎ Feb 23 2017 🗫︎ replies

This is the first movie I found so annoying I didn't finish the video.

👍︎︎ 3 👤︎︎ u/Rowsdower11 📅︎︎ Feb 28 2017 🗫︎ replies

Aside from the weak story, the terrible characters and the neverending poop jokes, I think that the art style turns me off more than anything. I mean, yeah, you can't have them looking like the actual creepy as hell dolls but those squat faces are hardly an improvement.

My Little Pony manages to make the characters look good and that's with a fraction of this movie's budget. Why would you design them like this?

👍︎︎ 2 👤︎︎ u/ROBOT_B9 📅︎︎ Feb 23 2017 🗫︎ replies

Bergen is a major Norwegian city, the more you know.

👍︎︎ 1 👤︎︎ u/audiaudun 📅︎︎ Feb 23 2017 🗫︎ replies
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