r/Murderedbywords Call an Ambulance! 🚑

welcome to our sloshed murdered by words where sticks and stones can break your bones but words hurt a lot more deer are sloshed ask reddit parents have read it why don't you close the door when you're leaving our rooms reply because saying son your room stinks of the month old [ __ ] socks that are clearly stuffed down the side of the bed and you need to let some fresh air in here because I'm genuinely worried at this point that breathing the air that is currently in here technically counts as me swallowing your money shot it's just going to embarrass us both then the user prodigal nun adds this in the comments next week's ask reddit thread my son has begun leaving his bedroom door open and now the whole house smells like stale [ __ ] socks please advise CEO of Wall Street bank that took 25 billion bailout warns of socialism for everyone else here's a list of things corporations have said will destroy the economy the 14 hour work day banning children from mines unions increasing the minimum wage the 12 hour work day this six-day Work Week the five day work week not lowering taxes on businesses lowering taxes on workers at the expense of business tax cuts increasing taxes on businesses forcing businesses to pay tax the 10-hour workday paying workers extra for working inconvenient days minimum safety standards for workers minimum safety standards for products banning the dumping of toxic chemicals in waterways the 8-hour workday banning corruption foreign workers American workers not rewarding CEOs who fail socialism ending corporate socialism the 40-hour workweek the thirty eight point five hour work week forcing businesses to guarantee workers more than ten hours of work per week forcing businesses to guarantee workers more than five hours of work per week forcing businesses to guarantee workers more than one hour of work per week there's probably more tweed by Newt Gingrich as Speaker of the House for for state of the unions by a president of the other party I am disgusted and insulted by the viciously partisan actions of Nancy Pelosi tearing the speech she isn't clever or cute her childishness insults our American traditions should be censured as Speaker of the House you persecuted a president for an extramarital affair while cheating on your wife sit down tweet from the Saudi embassy recent media reports that suggest that the kingdom is behind a hacking and mr. Jeff businesses phone or absurd we call for an investigation on these claims so that we can have all the facts out great idea there was a respected Washington Post columnist too I would love to have investigate the matter but you killed him pedophiles believe they should be part of the LGBT community I thought the Catholic Church opposed the LGBT community oh why are the world wars called the world wars when it was only a bunch of white countries beefing over who gets to control and eff up the world the most why does everything white suddenly become the world oh yes the world wars were White's remember the white countries Japan China Egypt Libya Morocco Iraq Brazil the Philippines Thailand Vietnam Burma and Ethiopia in the world wars so white yeah I remember that from history class when all those white people bombed Pearl Harbor post by CNN for the first time in its history Starbucks is giving all of its baristas sick leave breaking company decides employees shouldn't come in sick to handle food and drinks doesn't one illnesses spread to customers law were really praising billion-dollar corporations for doing the bare effing minimum here aren't we fun fact about Starbucks Starbucks employees in other countries get sick leave it's only in America that it's big news that employees get sick leave tweed by cardi B I do feel like if I go back to school and focus up I can be part of Congress I have so much ideas that make sense I just need a couple of years of school and I can shake the table then this guy replies quoting one of cardi B's earlier tweets I wonder how P tastes like ah my man barn Ruta says down in the comments and I agree with them Lowell there's no way there aren't at least a couple of people in Congress who don't know what P tastes like so I'm sure cardi B would fit right in I'm 25 and my girlfriend is 16 we're both Catholic and no passion hugging tell marriage so much for a pedophile that's called grooming you idiots you a grown man are grooming a 16 year old young girl who's just barely learning how to drive and most likely hasn't even experienced a job yet she can even vote or legally drink for EV sake she's not an adult she's a baby you're disgusting down in the comments bully bumbles has a best ok groomer weather can't be accurately forecast seven days ahead but people believe global warming and climate change will happen the stock market can't be accurately forecast seven days ahead and yet people seem fairly confident in the predictions that over time certain actions are highly likely to occur based on past trends so it's perfectly safe to assume that 30 years from now putting money into a 401k or IRA now is a good idea it's almost as if and bear with me here scientific evidence empirical testing and strong mathematics can provide a pretty good estimate of future events weird what's really crazy to me is that there are still people out there who don't understand the difference between global climate and local weather tweet from presidential candidate Bernie Sanders there's no state where a full-time minimum-wage worker can afford a one-bedroom apartment at the fair market rent that's unacceptable minimum wage 725 725 times 40-hour full-time work week 290 dollars 290 times four weeks per month is one thousand one hundred and sixty dollars in every southern state didn't have time to look at the rest of the country you can find some sort of studio apartment for around $500 per month sometimes less than that why bother lying about something easily disproven because Bernie Sanders supporters aren't going to back check him and they'll ignore any contrary evidence that's presented to them anyways things like this really tick me off and it's not political or anything but it's the fact that you think all the money is there here's what I mean that Weekly check comes - according to you at 290 bucks most places do not pay for your half-hour lunch that's required by law so your beginning number was wrong 725 dollars times seven and a half hours a day times five days a week only gets you 271 bucks most people in America get paid bi-weekly so let's double it to get the budget 543 dollars that's gross not net out of that comes anywhere between ten and fifteen percent taxes depending on the state so we'll lowball it to 10 percent automatically down to 489 a paycheck now a health insurance usually anywhere from seventy to a hundred dollars a paycheck for the cheapest plans again we'll lowball it and go 70 bucks so now we have four hundred and nineteen dollars a paycheck times two is eight hundred and thirty nine dollars eight hundred and thirty-nine dollars a month but again you seem to think that's fair so let's proceed you say rinse five hundred bucks okay the person now has three hundred and thirty nine dollars left to buy groceries for the whole month pay utilities car payment car insurance and gas money to get to work these are the bare needs you have to eat you have to pay for heat water garbage removal gas and/or electricity because apartments don't always include things and rarely all the above most cities in America don't have public transportation mine doesn't despite the fact that our population is over fifteen thousand people not counting a taxi if you have a car you have to pay that if you have a car legally you have to have car insurance you have to pay that you have to have gas in that car to get to work to make that money now if you can tell me you can get all of that out of three hundred and thirty nine dollars you're lying you are so focused on rent that you aren't thinking about everything else people have to pay for rent was an example this is a breakdown of the budget you gave me and it's not possible to live off that in 2017 America and because this person makes over $800 a month they probably won't qualify for financial aid or food stamps $800 is the line in my state where they won't help you know food stamps financial aid our government housing if you make more than $800 a month why does it bother you that people deserve to live above the poverty line I mean let's ignore the math for a second I want to know where these magical apartments are where rent is only $500 a month I would kill for $500 rent Sanders falters when as tough questions he cannot bring himself to completely condemn dictators still doesn't get why right wing talking point on immigration is false Jennifer your piece has a major error in it you say the question was whether she is a dictator Sanders could not bring himself to answer in the affirmative maybe you missed this in a transcript New York Times do you think president G is a dictator Bernie yeah I do kind reminder the X chromosome contains 1,098 genes the Y chromosome has only 78 genes the X chromosome is over 5 times larger than the Y it's science females are superior by far hence hundreds of years of chauvinism to try to suppress her good night reply onions have more DNA than humans I will never forget when my mom tried to use her cancer to get my sister's boyfriend of seven years to propose by saying don't make me go to my oldest daughter's wedding bald Steve and he looked this woman dead in the eyes and responded they make really good wigs now Joan ruthless if the cancer doesn't kill your mom that burn sure will tweet by Senator Rand Paul despite climate alarmists predictions humans will likely survive for hundreds of millions of years into the future in the meantime we should begin creating atmospheres on suitable moons planets so you believe man-made climate change is possible on every planet except earth question how should I respond to my boss who fired me via email and let him know that I am very disappointed that he didn't have the courtesy to do this face-to-face we work from different states but always communicate through video calls answer dear boss thought you want to know someone has apparently hijacked your email account the hacker just fired me obviously a transparent attempt to make you look like a gutless spineless cowardly sniveling weasel a [ __ ] lacking the nuts to man up and look his people in the eye while stabbing them in the back but I'm certain we'll all have a good laugh over this in the morning talk to you then love me here's a fun fact about when I got fired back before I became a full-time youtuber I had a nine-to-five office job and naturally I had health insurance do my job and the way it worked was at the beginning of the month you got health insurance for the rest of the month but my douchebag boss waited until the very last day of the month to fire me so that literally I had zero extra days of health insurance coverage surprise not only are you fired but you also don't have health insurance go [ __ ] yourself boomer is the in word of ageism being hip and flip does not make bigotry okay nor is the derisive epithet acceptable because it's new saying your generations official name is the equivalent of the most heinous racial slur in America is some real boomers that was our / murdered by words and if you enjoyed this video then you can support my channel by hitting that like button because it really helps my channel grow

Channel: rSlash

Views: 373,106

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, funniest posts, funny, comedy, funniest reddit posts, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, murderedbywords, funny murderedbywords, r/murderedbywords, murderedbywords posts, murderedbywordsfails, murdered by words, murderedbywords wtf

Id: kj02-zrBDP8

Length: 12min 50sec (770 seconds)

Published: Sun Feb 23 2020