r/Maliciouscompliance "I Want A Burger With EVERYTHING!" "lol ok"

welcome to our slash malicious compliance we're an entitled Karen monologues and then get shocked when someone foils her evil plan my first job was waitressing at a 50s diner style burger joint I think I was about 16 it was a sweet gig my coworkers were generally nice the customers were a mixed bag though we did have one homeless guy that would come in and do our food challenge weekly for a free meal he was cool anyways to the story at hand I had a family come in if I remember correctly it was a traditional dad mom and two kids it was lunch rush and basically all the tables in the bar were filled so I'm taking their order in the dad asked for a burger what would you like on that burger everything well we have a lot of options i gestured to the menu section containing the topping choices the dad does a once-over clearly not long enough to read looks back at me and states everything at this point I should note we had a bunch of choices looking at the restaurants menu they currently have mustard onion slaw chili Mayo ketchup lettuce tomatoes pickles grill jalapenos grilled mushrooms grilled onions grilled peppers I feel like there was even more choices when I worked there this place also had four to five cheese options I asked the debt a few more times if he's sure I even tried to list the toppings his wife even tried to explain the situation I could tell he was getting agitated but I also knew he didn't know what everything meant eventually I took his word for an attempt to get the rest of his order do you want cheese I said everything well we have for everything yikes I want to point out that he's literally yelling here those Eklund points are not for emphasis well I finished taking the tables order on the ticket I remember specifically taking the time to meticulously write out every ingredient as clearly as I could the tickets were small and each ingredient was denoted by an acronym so it was a challenge to fit everything I also made sure to include every possible cheese I knew this monstrosity was gonna get sent back I knew it was an abomination but I was determined to give this man what he asked for the the line cooks looked at me like you sure with a simple nod I pulled the trigger I walked the burger out to the man with the biggest grin it had to have been two pounds of sloppy wet burger the annoyance on his face would have been reward enough but as predicted the father called my manager over and complained my manager came to me fuming clearly he'd been chewed out by the man you know you had to ask the customers what they wanted their burgers I did I well the man at table 11 said he didn't ask for that mind you I was still 16 at this point and timid still I explained the situation my managers demeanor change and he had a little smirk on his face my manager asked me to follow him back to the table and grabbed a menu on the way hi sir I need some clarity what exactly did you ask for on your burger uh everything but my manager opened the menu on the table pointing to the topping options sir this is everything this is what's on your burger I'll be happy to remake the burger to your specifications if you can give them this time but we're very busy and it could take a while Oh p-please take his order so I did I can't remember his actual order anymore but it was definitely a more traditional burger it probably took about 10 minutes to come out so his family was mostly done with their meal when he was beginning we could have taken another burger off the line to make his but why make a chill table wait down in the comments we have this story from grim Buddha I had this same kind of thing happen at a subway I worked at this dude had been kicked out of the store during the day when the owners were there but still came in at night when all of his teams were working he ordered a meatball and told me I want everything on it don't f it up I'm going to the liquor store next door I tried to ask what he meant by everything and he just gave me a vile look and walked out I put every ingredient we had on the sub including all the sauces mayo mustard and every veggie we had I got finished wrapping it up right as he walked back in he paid and left I never had the fun of seeing his face but he also never came back so it was still a win and we had yet another away from epic normalcy I work in a pizza place I once got an order for a garbage pizza important to note no such pizza has ever existed on our menu I politely asked what exactly they wanted on this pizza everything okay could you be more specific we have a ton of toppings everything it's a garbage pizza you put everything on it so you want me to include everything she was getting pissed and I was done are you sure you want all of our toppings that's what I said we put every single topping on that pizza sausage pepperoni Canadian bacon pineapple jalapenos banana peppers sauerkraut shrimp chicken bacon onions on and on it was an absolute monstrosity it smelled effing awful she picked it up open the box and started freaking out what the hell is this what the f is this it's everything man you told me you wanted every single topping we have this is it she wanted to refund we said no you got what you ordered she pulled the whole I'm never coming back and stayed true to her word and in response to that classiest robin sums up my thoughts perfectly why do people threaten people making 725 an hour with never coming back I could literally not care less actually it's even better than that because you're doing that minimum-wage worker a favor our next reddit post is from Pete calm some years ago I was finally out of debt and ready to start investing for my future but I didn't have a clue how that's when I heard about a national organization that promoted investment clubs offering support and tools to help people like me learn about investing by doing it I like the idea get smarter play low stakes and maybe have a beer or two while you do it so I told a few friends they talked to their friends and pretty soon we had a budding investment club since we were all friends of friends organizing went smoothly we elected officers and adopted a simple Charter based on the national groups templates minimum monthly dues were set at $10 an amount any one of us could afford to throw away but any member could contribute more than the minimum if they lie and to build up our investing pot most of us did individual contributions bought shares in the club's holding like a stock in a corporation higher contributions meant more shares which meant more voting power when we made club decisions and then opie goes on to explain that new members have to be voted into the club and that once you're a club member you can basically buy voting power by spending more money on the club the more money you spend on the club the more voting power you have then it came Pat Pat was an outlier in our friend group most of us newer but few knew her well she had a reputation for being a little too loud a little too blunt a little too cocky a little too rude but she was also known to be smart in a club focused on learning more smart couldn't hurt right besides our well respected president had brought her in and right away Pat proved she was smart she had reviewed our charter in her past minutes before she came to her first meeting she asked solid questions about past decisions and our reasoning she listened respectfully to the education and stock study presentations probing politely and made mostly appreciative comments after each meeting she threw in a bit of smarty pants now and then but we could handle it after her third meeting we sent her to the next room while we discussed inviting her to join us there were a few misgivings expressed we had all heard stories about Pat's capacity for unpleasantness after all but the president said I warned her pretty bluntly that she used to behave when she's here we're all friends but this is business money is serious so I told her keep yourself in check leave your attitude outside ultimately everyone agreed she had indeed behaved we had no reason to doubt her sincere interest so we called Pat back in and president said congratulations Pat just pay your dues and sign here with a flourish Pat handed the treasurer a $10 bill and everyone applauded as she signed the Charter then she said thank you oh thank you but frankly you really don't have any way to keep me out the room got quieter then she turned to the treasurer and said now next month if I'm interpreting your little reports correctly oh I have to do is give you X amount of money have equal voting rights is that right that's about right yes came the answer and if I were to give you that plus and here she pointed at the bottom line of the club soda Holdings this certain amount I'd become the new majority shareholder right I suppose and then I'd be in charge of all Club decisions declared Pat's that's right unless you can all keep ponying up more cash than I can there's nothing you can do to stop me from running this club like my own little private account with nearly double my money to play with is there and now that I've signed your silly charter you don't even have any way to kick me out so see you all next month she smirked turned and left the door had just barely closed when the room exploded she was joking rights oh hell no the nerve could she really do that that can't be real how big a mistake did we just make wow what a class-a jerk but as we looked over a template-based Charter we found she was right there were requirements for tax reporting officer fiscal responsibilities bank and brokerage relationships conflicts of interest and a host of other issues we'd never faced and never expected to face there was a boilerplate language about how to buy out a voluntarily withdrawing member there was a provision allowing us to involuntarily withdrawal someone who didn't keep up with dues and/or attendance but we had no cap on individual member contributions and no provision allowing us to kick out a stake holder so long as they continued to pay their dues and attend meetings and we now realize that if she could make good on her threat to by majority holding Pat could simply out vote any attempt to amend our Charter a more elegant solution probably existed but within 20 minutes someone came up with the nuclear option two minutes later we agreed to launch it we accepted assignments then went our separate ways to prepare for the next month's meeting that evening everyone arrived a bit more promptly and settled a lot more quietly than usual Pat looked smug as she took a seat seeming not to care that no one spoke to her she was ostentatiously Fanning herself with a personal check too bad we never saw it so we'll never know if she really was ready to put her money where her loud mouth had been the president of the floor before I call the meeting to order I have a personal announcement to make I made a really poor recommendation to all of you last month I feel the bad judgment I showed means I'm not fit to be your president I'm presenting my letter of resignation and my voluntary withdrawal from the club and he solemnly gave the letter to the secretary Pat looked like she'd been slapped but said nothing the treasurer spoke up just so you all know the president spoke to me earlier about this decision so I've already calculated that withdrawal payout and have it ready according to the terms of our charter and the president took the check the vice president spoke next president you weren't alone in that decision I voted with you and I also regret my poor judgment here is my letter of resignation and withdrawal the treasurer said and here is your withdrawal payout prepared as we discussed and on it went in small clusters at first then all in a rush each club member declared they'd made a terrible decision presented a letter and collected an already prepared check sometime during the rush Pat stopped being silent okay I see yeah yeah I get it seriously you've made your point that's enough now you don't have to keep up this act knock it off already you effers but we didn't with all the letters collected the secretary added them to the back of the fat binder containing copies of all the club minutes and gave the binder to Pat's your kness club secretary will need this the treasurer was right behind with a similar binder of financial records and a $10 bill on top here's all your clubs accounting records and remaining assets the president added this signed charter to the stack so Pat looks like you're now a club of one you win good luck and goodbye we all stood and stared silently until she shoved the stack to the floor and saw herself sputtering to the door within ten minutes we had signed our newly upgraded Charter re-elected our officers torn up all of our payout checks and put our new club back to business usual okay maybe just a bit more giggly and a little more pleased with ourselves unusual we never saw Pat again didn't care why did Pat monologue her evil plan like some sort of super villain in a movie if she just kept her mouth shut then she might have gotten away with it but no she just had the gloat in front of everybody what a [ __ ] our next reddit post is from Sparkle fritz this wasn't me doing a malicious compliance nor the request but the middleman who witnessed this gloriousness I worked for a movie theater company in a state that snows every winter we had a contract with a snow shoveling company but my boss refused to use it because the cost of each removal had a possibility of hurting his yearly bonus by a couple percent points like $300 max out of twenty thousand dollars only if it snows more than six inches he would say every time unfortunately this meant that one of the ushers would have to shovel snow on the sidewalk since it's a safety hazard to block the emergency exit doors of a theater it meant you had to shovel a path around the entire building and for each exit door ultimately due to the size it's about a quarter mile around the building no one likes doing it because it's cold and shoveling a simple one shoveling path can take two hours during a snowy Christmas week which is the busiest week for movie theaters of the year imagine Black Friday shopping for two weeks straight it had snow just under six inches we were extremely busy and my boss demanded to take one of our much-needed uh sure's to go shovel snow I was an assistant manager when we asked if the company would come out instead of us doing it we were told no to which one of my co-workers will call him dan said he would do it an hour later after Dan had gone outside one by one my boss pulled each asure in and wrote them up for refusing to shovel snow when Dan came back in the other Usher's complained him about it dan asked our boss why and our boss said that it was because no one wanted to shovel all the snow and if Dan didn't shovel all the snow he would get written up as well this all happened at the beginning of my shift around 5:00 p.m. cue the malicious compliance what my boss didn't realize was that it with the last day of the payroll period being Christmas week Dan had already accumulated 40 hours of work earlier in the week my boss left right after telling Dan to make sure all of the snow was removed we worked the rest of the shift and everyone assumed Dan had finished and left it's 3 a.m. now and we go to punch out for the week but can't because there's a shift that hasn't been approved yet someone is still working and has that 12 hours of overtime it's Dan I go out to investigate since it should only be myself and my manager as I walk outside I see Dan coming back in smiling the biggest grin on his face and the most dry unstow path I've ever seen in my life there was not a speck of snow on the entire front path of the theatre Dan spent 10 hours outside making sure that he removed all the snow from the walkway we had a good laugh clocked off and left we didn't hear anything until later that week when I was called into the office and had to write out a statement why I let Dan work 12 hours of overtime my boss had this smug look on his face like he had beaten us he wasn't too pleased when he found out that all of our statements included him saying the phrase remove all the snow and that he refused to call the snowplow company my boss was transferred to another theater soon after that was our sloshed malicious compliance and if you liked this video then hit that subscribe button because I put on new reddit videos every single day

Channel: rSlash

Views: 921,429

Rating: 4.9522691 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, funniest posts, funny, comedy, funniest reddit posts, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, maliciouscompliance, malicious, compliance, r/maliciouscompliance

Id: zV8auxUrLgw

Length: 16min 55sec (1015 seconds)

Published: Sun Jun 21 2020

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r/Maliciouscompliance

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