r/CursedComments | Somethings are better off never posted

the harder you shake the more 'changes color just like a baby uh are slash cursed comments it's gonna get rough Sarah what the hell is that thing I remember the first time I saw one I was pretty freaked out too apparently they're called Asians and there's like 15 different kinds apparently there's a third option between burial and cremation confetti I saw a strip called across the street from a mini-golf place and I'm liberal but that's too much for me what if you're just trying to have a nice afternoon with your family then your kids look across the street and have to see a bunch of losers playing mini golf we already have the right to health care it's called owning a gun how how is owning a gun health care well my grandma broke her ankles so instead of wasting money on taking her to the doctor I just shot her we're uh we're approaching Peak murica with this post here my name is Pete and I like feet every time I see them I beat my meat stay a million feet away from me a million feet but uh our baby's recyclable now but I'm pretty sure they're compostable biodegradable [Music] I mean they're not wrong what is heavier a 200 pounds of bricks or 200 pounds of feathers the answer is the feathers 200 pounds of bricks is just a bunch of bricks but if you try to carry 200 pounds of feathers you also have to carry the weight of what you did to those poor birds that was that was deep and I did not anticipate that name one character who could beat Black Panther go ahead I'll wait captain a bola uh you're on sounds annoying we should murder her we don't even know her exactly the fewer connections the harder would be for the authorities to catch us for all you mountain climbers out there climbs up and takes a few good slurps while I piss on the wall yeah thanks thanks for that dude I I don't I don't appreciate that comment what if mayonnaise came in cans that would suck because you can't microwave metal good morning to everyone except these two people people actually microwave their mayonnaise when women say they're horny when men say they are horny I wish these pictures weren't together I mean I'm then boom I accidentally look up wait a minute the Krabby Patty secret ingredient is crab meat mr. Krabs is a cannibal found that out when I was younger because every menu item has the key ingredient in the name like the kelp drink l'm al you tell me mr. krabs putting his meat in the formula that his meat we've heard noticed that he is the only crab in town well the Krusty Krab is a crab trap after all nobody JK rowling do you know why Dumbledore was called the headmaster hmm hmm let me go into extreme detail for you even though you probably don't care so it all started when Dumbledore met a wizard named Greenwald and that kids is why Dumbledore was now known as the head master top comment decides my next video upload sad man job Pikachu giving birth I don't know shed man why don't you drop Pikachu giving birth yeah in sick if you don't know who shad Minh is keep it that way unless you're a high schooler looking to ruin someone's day then I can speak from experience boy oh boy can you ruin someone's day did you know there is a skeleton inside you right now you don't have a skeleton inside you you're a brain you're inside of a skeleton you're piloting a bone mech that's using meat armor when you get your girl family barbecue helping in her grandma yell out thank you handsome granny wants some of that handsome for herself and I'm all about helping the elderly congratulations now you and I are both cursed with this post my dad gave me a golden gate I'm and I've never been happier I I didn't realize how this might sound and not Australians I'm really sorry it's hard to have a gay time on your own golden gate I'm I feel like you Australians are just king with us now it's complete safe his arms and legs are too far away from the tree curtis at the gun off I let my infant play with my loaded 12-gauge all the time he loves it and it's good for teething revolvers however are much more dangerous I learned that the hard way with my first child Jesus Christ imagine how king angry the rat that controls Gordon Ramsay must be all the time but Gordon Ramsay doesn't wear a chef's hat so where's the rat an x-ray showing a Buzz Lightyear action figure lodged in the anal cavity the patient explained that it got stuck when it was inserted and a button was accidentally pushed extending out the wings looks like you got a friend in you you know my question is had it how did he even do that in the first place I just how today I operated on a little girl she needed Oh negative blood but we didn't have any but her twin brother has own negative blood I explained to him that it was a matter of life and death he sat quietly for a moment and then said goodbye to his parents he didn't think anything of it until after we took his blood and he asked so when will I die he thought he was giving his life for hers thankfully they both died oh thank god I hate happy endings doctor sir patient it's ma'am doctor ma'am you have testicular cancer nintendo's switch my family got me a vibrating toothbrush that I can most definitely use to and finally get off god damn it but the only problem here is that it's got Mike Wazowski 's face on it and I don't know if I'm ready for that level of commitment I did it I did it and I hate myself always watching Mike Wazowski oh hey he's watching fun fact for some reason Mike Wazowski and Olaf from frozen fanfiction exists so a lot like Shadow Man if you want to ruin someone's day I got you covered it's to be widely spread but I've never met an anti-vaxxer in real life I've met a couple I think it's regional and they often lay relatively low except for the really crazy ones yeah that or they're too busy attending their kids funerals nice woman who falsely accused 15 men of rape jailed for 10 years ha victory it does look like a 15 man job to be honest men have read it what's the greatest realization you've had during post nut clarity I I should not watch Waluigi anti anymore Wow all right this went from 25 to 100 real quick I'm a I'm I need a link fam what gives people feelings of power money status not bringing your backpack on the last day of school if I don't bring my backpack where will I keep my kazoos [Music] why can you please put the money OOW in the bagu Wagyu mr. kawaii cashier senpai hmm please mister I want to die now Thanks notice me cashier senpai I want to die after having to read that oh my god if you want me to avoid conversation with you just address me with will i zy z how is you it's a guarantee block for me on any social media platform you know who you are I would come on Jessie woody and buzzes faces then leave the room while the other toys cancel them while they cry knowing they can't but their faces because it would cause suspicion please go to church clear skin is so attractive I'd chop a toe off for clear skin forever I heard you liked clear skin I swear it up King God writing a post in this website is like talking to a king Genie better be specific adjust it or some smart ass is gonna ruin your life [Music] protip use rubber bands to cosplay it's that house oh my god please just cut them try that on your neck I'm a teacher and I fully support this if perverts want to stare at children they should have to earn all the teaching certificates the rest of us had to get wait clear for sensitive skin extra it's like his snoring got so bad that his wife left him and now he's just forever alone with his extra strength Breathe Right strips maybe the strips were so effective that he inhaled his wife oh hey it's stick man he's the best at pushing me on the swings he's best at getting to Jesus okay thank you for watching the second edition of cursed comments if you want to see the original click the end screen here and until next time I'll see y'all later and enjoy the peaceful minecraft background as we slowly fade into obscurity oh also I had 100 K that's pretty cool anyways now it's been soon still working on the video see you later

Channel: Oz Media

Views: 1,640,101

Rating: 4.9316654 out of 5

Keywords: satire, r/ top posts, r/cursedcomments best posts, r/cursedcomments emkay, r/cursedcomments oz media, reddit, top posts of all time, emkay, subreddit, top posts, reddit top posts, r/cursedcomments top posts, giofilms, best of reddit, reddit posts, r/, top all time, cursed comments, reddit true stories, 100% true stories

Id: Jq9GesCLCPE

Length: 12min 29sec (749 seconds)

Published: Sat Jun 01 2019