Miriam's Serious Shopping Addictions Leaves Her With £36,000 DEBT | Spendaholics

[Music] meet Miriam issue would a twenty seven-year-old window dresser with an expensive passion for fashion I don't usually buy for a reason I just usually buy because I want to I think the problem for me is it's literally lifestyle this lifestyle means Miriam skint and filling up her tiny rented room to overflow I bought it I wore it twice I've never worn them ever I just got a straight along with countless jeans there are countless bags including two from Fendi bought in the same week was that five hundred points 25 pounds and she spent piles on dress it's very yodel a after dress electric-blue insane after dress and when it comes to bling she's got pop loads Paul Broca very funny but the small matter of Miriam's 36 grand debt isn't the figure to me is actually a myth it's not something that touches me I kind of like try and comfort myself by going it's totally cool yeah but it is actually not totally cool but help is at hand psychological coach Benjamin fried will take Miriam on a rollercoaster ride to eke out the hidden reasons behind her compulsive spell I'm worried I suppose that your normal life maybe seems a bit disappointing by comparison well lifestyle expert Jay hunt will see if she can shock Miriam out of her habits come inside why this is Miriam's booty I really feel like enough is enough I feel like it's time that I just got the right help and advice with regards to my shopping [Music] single twenty-seven-year-old Miriam issue wood moved to London eight years ago she hasn't exactly found the streets paved with gold despite working two jobs Miriam earns to sixteen thousand pounds a year less than half the London average and that's with a top degree in retail and law I'm not challenged in either my jobs you know I'm not working for the best of my ability Miriam's a display dresser at a flagship West End store it means she has to navigate Oxford Street Britain's busiest shopping mecca every day her other job is working as a bard or hostess two nights a week it's not just the jobs that depress her she lives in a cramped room in a shared rented house this is living life student you know it's not living like an adult and there's no escape her current spending means she's put on hold any dreams of owning a property I don't have anything that's actually equit support I don't have any sort property or I don't have a car the rest of Miriam's family are high achievers her two younger sisters are a doctor and an investment banker her dad is a physicist and author in sharp contrast Miriam hasn't got a fulfilling job doesn't own any property and has been single for seven years she finds pleasure elsewhere clothes are like theater for me unlike dressing up I like to feel like today I could be this person tomorrow I could be this person when shopping Miriam loves to track down special pieces she'll hunt through dozens of shops for that perfect item I like challenge I think I like to hunt things down because I like a challenge a challenge the rest of her life isn't providing so I'm just gonna literally look through this shop try and blitz it and see if I can find anything I love that [Music] the hunt becomes a frenzy if the price is right at the moment I'm just looking at everything and even talking to you I'm like still looking around to see if there's anything I've missing but yeah I'm having fun her friend Orion thinks she's out of control she's got something in her mind there's no getting out of it but that piece in her mind is going to end up in our closet clothes aren't Miriam's only problem each month she spends a hundred and twenty quid on sushi over 1/10 of her one thousand one hundred and twenty pounds pay packet some people think it's a bit excessive I like it so far Miriam's non-stop shopping has landed her with massive debts not least to her dad she owes him over thirty thousand pounds I think when you are your parents money feel incredibly guilty I think there's no other feeling you can have what my dad thinks about my dad is just pay it back when you can a substantial amount should have been repaid in terms of the spirit of what we agreed but she doesn't really take much notice of anything I say in practice with a shopping addiction a dead-end life and an ever-growing debt Mariam needs help I feel very frustrated for her because in a sense she's going nowhere that's where lifestyle expert Jay hunt and psychological coach Benjamin fry coming while Miriam's out and about they're about to see the scale of the problem in her tiny rented room so Jay there's just the one room with this one double room and then uses it as a kind of everything their initial feeling might be that's of claustrophobia I think that you could easily walk in there and feel like everything's caving in on you oh can you get in I can't look at anything there's so much to look at all of these plastic things are those awful just boxes and boxes and boxes of these watches how many can one person actually wear huh nice Louis Vuitton little raincoat here as well how much do you think it affects that this being the only room essentially that she lives in she's fitting into a bedroom all the stuff that most people might look put in a one-bedroom flat if you've only got one room to live in for a lot of people you would make it into more of a living room than you would a bedroom but because she's got so much stuff it's like it is it can't be anything else but a storage room in a bedroom and a you know just a depository I feel a bit claustrophobic and nobody even I wonder if it's a bit like her head is gonna be a bit cluttered bills here we go 3,000 pounds on Barclaycard oh look parental loan 13,000 271 pounds is on her parental loan Barclaycard 2008 card it's a one-way traffic okay [Music] it's a wet and miserable day in North London Jay and Benjamin have invited Miriam to her local woods for a treasure hunt she's used to tracking down clothes and accessories in shops but what horrors will she find here if you've got any idea why we brought you here today now I have no no not a clue not a clue would you like a clue I would like because I have fear here a clue the first clue in your treasure hunt because you are famous for hunting down items that you covered right so we're expecting you to be really good at this not sure you'll find what you want at the end of it head back to the crossroads and the sign followed the capital ring and look for the iron bars a prison of accessories oh my god each clue contains a sum of money that represents what Miriam spent on the items in her rented room three thousand one hundred and fifty five pounds money spent on shoes and bags that's just head for horns a and the barren expanse [Music] 3196 pounds Miriam what we turn that's all the money that I spend on costume jewelry it's a lot of stuff and it is a lot of money that I spent on just pure costume jewelry didn't really really realize how much I'd spend let's see what's next oh my god my dress is hanging from a tree oh my god that is a lot isn't there seven thousand four hundred and forty one pounds what do you think of that I'm actually flabbergasted that is all the clothes that you have bought in your room that's a lot more than I expected it to be you're finally finally slightly flabbergasted aren't it you're getting there you never worked out like this no I'm gonna add this to your burdens okay I think you're less clueless than when you started out today the full value of everything in Miriam's room is seventy thousand nine hundred and thirty-eight pounds enough for a deposit on a flat if we sort of fast forward to Miriam at 55 yeah what do you want to be doing that what's your master plan I would like to have my own property I would like to be successful in my job and I would like not to be spending at the rate I'm spending now okay because you know the thing is that 55 is the age where most people have paid off their mortgages because most of them have got their own property owner on that mortgage ladder before you because what we'd like to show you is the property that we think you will own at 55 if you don't stop spending Miriam will be 55 in another 28 years but what will shopping at her current rate mean for her dream of owning a property Benjamin and Jay have one more fright install now I'm just gonna take your blindfold off and show you your property now oh my god what does that say up there oh my god 137 thousand 468 exactly this figure represents the amount that you will have spent at 55 on clothes if you continue spending at the rate you're spending and this here is your property because this will be the amount of stuff that you will have accumulated by the age of 55 if you carry on with the horrendous what would you rather have I'd rather have somewhere to live then have laid the clothes to live on well I don't want to end up to the point where I've got this amount of stuff in front of me I think we should go and sit down and work out your cold-turkey budget and get you started if Miriam spending doesn't stop her futures looking scary [Music] before she finds out her cold turkey budget Benjamin and Jay want to discover how much Miriam thinks she spends in the average week after bills and rent do you keep a tally you guys the cash point how do you organize it I don't I just take money out as and when I need it so what happens when you run out then I'm stuck and I'm eating 9p noodles so how much money do you think you get through in an average week probably got eighty pounds is that unrealistic we've been through all your statements and you might be interested to know that the amount of money you get through on an average week is a hundred and forty pounds yeah so that's what you're getting through right which is almost double what you think you're getting through yeah that is actually what really worries us about this is that you're spending twenty pounds a week more than you're bringing in and also none of this is being used to pay back any of your debts any of the credit card bills paying off your parents anything like that so nothing is being you know made to go as an inroad into your debt so on the basis that that's what you spend how much do you think would be the minimum amount that you could live on for seven days a secret no it's not even an rib babies 60 quid well actually 60 we were thinking 25 okay I think 25 quid is realistic it's not being mean that's why I'm setting you such a low by spending so little you'll realise what's important to you okay so it's 25 quid 7 days just give it your best shot yeah ok 25 pounds is in my opinion doable but I think I'm really going to struggle I'm gonna go into the shops probably at some point in this week I'm just gonna window shop because I also find that quite rewarding day one of cold turkey and Miriam's having to blow most of her budget on a travel card she's worked at a cheaper way to get into work using only bosses but it still leaves her with just 8 pounds 50 for 7 days and with such a measly amount things aren't looking too sweet I would usually go in here on a Saturday and get myself a bar chocolate I have popped him once in a while when I've run out of money and I've had like a pound left my bargain with them to get me a like a cheaper ice-cream but today I have to walk past and laugh I can't buy anything [Music] but Merriam's arranged a lunch with good friend Katie it could leave her totally skint for the rest of the week I'm on a restricted budget 25 pound for the whole wheel entire week okay going out every pair lean people bbc3 well then I feel like I should buy you longish Maryam falls on her feet proving there is such a thing as a free lunch but there's still six days to go and each day's loaded with temptation usually on a Saturday I would actually go into a bar with Katie and we'd have a couple of glasses of wine I couldn't get any wine today or anything so that was really difficult I think I had a diet coke in the end and paid for by Katie because that would have been an entire taste budget for me on this 25 pound budget week yeah day one I think I'm doing okay we'll see tomorrow over and out [Music] by day three the lure of the summer sales becomes too much I'm going to buy this t-shirt just tears fall four pounds it's complete bargain I like it very me so with eight pounds fifty in her pockets going into the store she's about to leave four pounds lighter retail rehab isn't working by day four it's time to get creative with the food she already has in her kitchen cupboards she think I've got enough noodles to last me the week in here mmm but seriously Miriam needs more than just noodles to eat and she's only got four pounds 50 left I'm gonna try and spend one pound fifty max in here today it's gonna be on budget please strike cardboard she'll have to watch every penny to stick to her rigid one pound fifty Target oh okay where the tin tomorrow is around but on the way out Miriam freezes at the site of her favorite food ice cream mango and passion fruit that sounds amazing strawberry cheesecake sounds amazing two for five pounds something even more amazing and I'm not gonna even look anymore miriam goes over her self-imposed supermarket budget of one pound fifty by just 39p she's five days into her cold turkey week and with two pounds sixty one left Miriam's doing well with the challenge her coping strategy could be a clue for Benjamin as he begins piecing together the reasons behind her spending I wonder if there is something about running out of money it could be a thrill sort of thing where at the end of the month I'm running out of money and it's like this desperate what am I gonna do what am I gonna do and how far can I make my how much money I have left stretch it's about getting close to the edge yeah I think that Benjamin's wondering if Miriam's love of living on the edge with huge debts is rooted in childhood experiences maybe when I was young I used to always be late for school so I'd get up late and then I was actually rushing at the last minute to get my bus so what was it about going to school that was not a woman smoking cozy environment I didn't feel integrated in that school Miriam went to school in rural Essex she'd moved there from Nigeria at the age of five with her white english father and black Nigerian mother until her sisters joined her Miriam was the only black child at her village school I think that a lot of people weren't open to different cultures in the area that I grew up in and weren't really open to sort of understanding somebody who wasn't exactly like they wear or didn't have the same views as they're more didn't grow up in the same environment as them so yeah it wasn't really warm and cozy obviously because you know I did feel like a bit of an outsider there Benjamin wonders whether Miriam's parents felt a need to overcompensate for her experience it may explain her father's pattern of bailing her out with loans of money if you've never done that where do you think you'd be with your debts now I'd probably be better off actually because I probably would have worked and I won't be such a spendthrift Benjamin's also keen to find out whether Miriam has any passions my passion is singing singing yeah okay after hitting her teens Miriam began to spend time in recording studios she's recorded a number of demos tracks but none of them have ever hit the big time would you like it to be your career though yes I would I think go go yeah yes and to um where do you feel you are with that goal do you feel that's realistic I find it very hard to find the time sometimes when I'm doing two jobs what if your singing career just dwindles and dies I've got a fabulous wardrobe took out fabulous work that's your initial response yeah but that's what's gonna get you into trouble with no sign of a big record deal Benjamin's wondering whether Miriam's dreams of being a singer are actually holding her back what I do think I maybe need to do with Miriam has helped her to give up on some of her childhood fantasies and move towards more realistic adult goals and help her feel okay about thinking about doing that but where the miriam will be up for Benjamin's challenges is another thing on one thing Miriam has done well is living on the edge with her cold turkey budget by the time it's all over she's got one pound 76 left just enough to treat herself I just finished cold turkey I've had one pound 76 left and I went to Tesco's and bought myself a bottle of Lambrini I've paid one pound 44 for this so technically I still would have ended up with 32 P so I'm really really pleased I'm gonna go home and drink this and I'm gonna get sloshed even on a little bottle like this so yeah having done so well on 25 pounds for a whole week Jays keen to deliver Miriam with her budget for the next five years so what we've got here is Miriam's new budget okay but before we have a look at this I just wants to find out how did you do in the cold turkey week I did crack halfway through the week and go into prime Arnie and buy myself a t-shirt which I really love and that sort of ate into my budget that was nearly half my weekly budget but it kept you yeah but it still kept me going in a normal week Miriam would spend an average of 50 pounds on clothes so 4 pounds isn't bad so what we've got here is current expenditure we've added everything up here and at the bottom we see that you're spending one thousand two hundred and twelve pounds 30 a month and you're bringing in one thousand one hundred and twenty pounds ninety four so every month there's an overspend of 91 pounds 36 on top of everything else right okay so that's obviously making sure your debt is increasing all the time right okay Miriam owes 36 grand on cards and loans she's only paying the minimum interest each month meaning she's not getting anywhere with reducing her debts one of the areas where we've actually increased your payments is the debts right and we've actually upped it to 400 pounds a month so that 400 pounds a month would actually take q five years at that rate to pay off this debt right okay if we could find an extra 90 pounds a month if you suddenly got a raise unexpected money something like that it immediately drops to four years Miriam needs to set up larger direct debits to the credit card companies and her parents to start getting rid of her debt Jay's also looked at her other spending now when we look at food and housekeeping the food shop at the moment 103 67 we've cut that back it's a 75 okay you know not a huge problem for you but something that came up which was quite surprising here is sushi i love sushi it's like this enormous budget every month goes on sushi so we have slashed that back oh my god no sushi well there is no sushi at the moment but you know there's not nothing to stop you using the eight pounds eighty six loads at the moment you're spending 200 a month and we've cut that back to fifty I mean how does that make you feel I think that after being on cold turkey for a week I can definitely control that because I think the thing is with you is that it's it's all or nothing yeah do you know what I mean you're either out there spending compulsively or it's like I'm actually really quite good at not spending and surviving on one pound there's nowhere close to what I thought it would be Oh actually yeah I actually thought it'd be a lot worse they were certain things on there that I'm not having to give up or cut back on and I'm still able to pay back my debt which is the important thing it looks like Jay is getting through to Miriam and she can now see how things could start to change I feel like I'm definitely changed the way I feel about money I think last week I thought that money was sort of monopoly I thought it was a bit of a game I thought it was there just to be spent whereas now I realized that you know what I can have a funky still you know life in London have fun and still not piss all my money at the wall for Miriam to stick to her strict five-year budget she's got to cut down on the clothes shopping it's hard when she has no idea what she already owns all hidden away and out of sight that's until now Jai's decided to shock Miriam by showing her the scale of what she owns she's taken all the clothes from Miriam's room and put them on display it's a very own shop [Music] welcome come inside know why this is Miriam spooty you know when you joke with some people and say you've got enough clothes to fill a shop well look and I would like to point out to you not only are we filling a shop but look how high oh yeah absolute shock in Miriam's boutique among many other items there are 40 pairs of jeans 70 handbags 85 dresses and 166 tops is there anything out of all of this that you could maybe look at not needing anymore and maybe we could think about selling it how does that make you feel not happy I'm speechless I'm actually speechless yeah I think that everything is worth considering but right now okay it's hard it is hard are there's some stuff that you would actually like to get rid of to free up a bit more room I think the room thing isn't that an aspect I don't think I need so many shoes especially off my shoes I'm not negotiating with my dresses in my bags okay so why don't we concentrate on looking through some tops and jeans and these shoes down here and try and fill one of these boxes with things that I prepared that you don't want to you have this choice it's about what you don't want right does that make you feel a bit better yes all right let's get going [Music] taking stock of her wardrobe is a good deterrent to wasting money on things she already has Jay is hoping that if Miriam can do this she'll not only deep flutter her bedroom but realize she really doesn't need to buy anything else it's a very therapeutic he's starting to enjoy this yeah yeah at the end of the afternoon there are two boxes of clothes to throw out and for to store in the loft and hopefully think about later more significantly the process has put Miriam off shopping for anymore I think that's more than you thought to be honest when I walked in here I felt really emotionally attached to everything in the room and I really felt like it was one of those things that was going to be a very difficult task for me but once I went around the room it was actually very quick for me to decide what I wanted to get rid of I learned a little bit more about how I can actually release and let go of these things more than I perhaps thought before I walked into this room and yes I do have a shops worth of clothes in my room whereas now I have a little bit less now Miriam you've got half a shops worth of clothes yeah yeah yeah we are making progress I feel really good I think Miriam has actually surprised herself today because I don't think she realized how well she could do she's very emotionally attached to her clothes and yet by the end of it she was quite in a mood right that's going that's going that's going no pressure on her she was doing all of that herself so she's come quite a long way to be honest I'm not really looking to buy anything else at the moment because having gone through this journey which I've gone through today I realized that I was holding on to a lot of things still not sure what I'm holding on to a few days later and the harsh shock of Miriam's boutique is still resonating leather jacket here which I haven't worn in ages and you know a few other bits that I just don't need say I've decided just to keep looking through my wardrobe and I'm probably gonna do this on a regular basis now and just start chucking somehow and then it's time to wave goodbye to some of her clothes at the charity shop with all this progress Benjamin wants to push Miriam further he worries she's underachieving and thinks her constant need for thrills might help explain her dangerous shopping habit he's brought her to a theme park do you have any idea why I brought you here no not really okay well the thing is that we have explored you have a little bit of a tendency to live life on the edge now I'm worried that when things get difficult what you do is you push it and push it and push it and see how far you can get away with you I worry about you want to do that yeah Benjamin's hoping that riding this rollercoaster will help Miriam consider why she likes to live life on the edge I feel great I feel terrified [Music] [Music] you like running out of money isn't because it gives you this thrill yes it does it gives me a thrill it gives me the feeling of life it gives me the feeling of light desperation and it works you for me here oh it's nice of them feeling so boring all the time or bored or you know life without these kind of thrill experiences it's a bit boring in you're a bit bored wow I don't suppose they are but it's sort of hell seems to me what you're saying do you need this stuff to pick you up I'm worried I suppose that your normal life maybe seems a bit disappointing by comparison maybe a bit depressing even something this kind of thing can really pack a punch and get you going yeah to get to the bottom of this disappointment and depression Benjamin takes Miriam to a quiet corner of the park do you think you'll find that if you really took life on and if you took on everyday the kind of challenges that suit your abilities every day would be like being on this road yeah sure but you'd be challenged every day and you get a sense of being tested yeah and that would be your thrill yeah but the moment you're just sleepwalking through your life yeah I am why yeah why why why yeah why yeah right you tell me yeah exactly you don't know I don't know why are you avoiding your potential because I'm lazy I think I think sometimes I can get lazy sometimes I can get stuck in a rut and just it's easier to face okay lazy can often mean I'm waiting for someone else to do it for me yeah baby whoo no way because I think your dad's involved a little bit as a player because he has enabled you to continue playing this game a bit longer than you might have done I mean that is one way of looking at it but I don't think it's the right way of looking out there Miriam still owes a thirteen thousand pound debt to her dad although it's very very latent and very unconscious and very much not put on the table like this maybe you're testing him to see how much he's gonna be there for you and you push yourself to the edge into the edge into the edge you're testing yourself you're testing him testing the family seeing just how much Miriam can muck about and get away with it a bit like a naughty girl trying to hide under the duvet make that last minute - for school yeah maybe maybe one of the reasons it's sometimes hard to take on adult forms and relationships and responsibilities it's because we're not finished being kids I think what's interesting about Miriam is that she does acknowledge that there's perhaps a missing part of her adult self there's something about this thrill-seeking which we exaggerated of course hugely today which she recognizes as being slightly a childish reaction to not feeling a life is interesting enough she says she's bored well if she's bored then she should challenge herself more because that's what adults do these kids that wait for someone to take them to a theme park so I do think we need to work on what Miriam hasn't finished about her childhood and what if she now needs to recognize and leave behind for the first time my sister thought so so for when I found dad and when I speak to I don't see all things my stuff oh you know this burns and in the back of our relationship it is affecting our relationship but so consciously it must be because one last bits Benjamin he said and it was a very sort of telling way of communicating it to me money always affects relationships but just as it looks like Miriam's starting to understand her spending she falls off the rails big style with a fortnight's holiday from her two jobs and having been a good girl for a week or two Miriam's gone into teenage rebel mode she's seeking new thrills by partying and it's costing her went to Alex's did some shots of rum came back here had another glass of one of these when next door had a couple of shots of gin and by the time I came back here at half ten pair electic night after night Miriam's out to the small hours her money's going up the wall on drink after drink [Music] when out with my girls went out with a whole bunch of people and by Monday this Monday I'd run out of cash literally what negative equity plus negative equity Olek mom has nothing in the bank perhaps she needs to sort this out of it Jay and Benjamin have met up for a crisis meeting to exchange notes and plan the way forward you know because of the fact that she's taken some time off work and the lack of routine has resulted in her really really upping her spending so have you been getting them I certainly have covered with her that there's something from her childhood that she feels is not finished yet yeah and there is something quite childlike about her sometimes when it comes to her behavior and her habits so I think Jay without access to really deeper material and deeper issues what I can do really usefully maybe it's to prepare the ground a bit on the surface psychology so that she might be more receptive to the stuff that you're going to bring in on a more practical level I agree what were the first practical thing I want to do is to talk to her about staying on the straight and narrow otherwise it's all gonna be off the bloomin rails Jay thinks Miriam's in denial she wants to sit her down and give her a good hard talking to so how much money is in your account right well I actually flatlined on Monday I went to the bank and I had absolutely nothing in the bank so all this partying going on have you been buying anything and I bought myself something yesterday oh okay what did you buy a bracelet and how much was that thirty pounds okay which is thirty pounds you don't have yes have you found any time to set up the direct debit to start paying about the days no so we haven't done that yet at all because it's now another month that's gone by with no money going towards paying the debts back and your mum and dad are still waiting yes can we absolutely now set up the direct debit so that that money that's going to go back towards the debts is non-negotiable yes yeah so absolute commitment on that yeah we could do all right by the time Miriam gets home Jays words have begun to sink in this needs to be resolved and if Jay can help me through a little bit of a Telugu there you know long term that's not so bad and I need to find a way around it because I need to pay off these debts frittering away a fortune on sushi is another problem Miriam needs to face she spends more than a fiver every day on this stuff Jay's lined up a sushi making lesson so that Miriam can roll her own daily fix for as little as 50 baht sushi might be pricey but the ingredients aren't Miriam could buy 10 sheets of seaweed for about a tepee very how do you make the rice though sticking any purpose that sitteth in it oh so so you can buy and a bottle of sushi vinegar will last for weeks and only cost a one-pound 30 I'm really happy I feel really felt like I've learned something really good today like really new and different [Music] my god it made quite a lot of sushi have a break that was pretty professional I do that sushi every day instead of 9p noodles the Japanese supermarket right on your doorstep and that's exactly what Miriam does at the oriental supermarket she buys enough stuff to make a month's worth of sushi for the cut price of 11 pounds 80 much better than the hundred and twenty quid she used to spend I can't understand why I've been doing that for so long buying see she without coming somewhere like this and actually say for myself a huge bundle of money because I think I could have saved myself undreds of pounds by now at home the chance to test out her newfound skills I need to get one of those really good knives well you know my first experience at home wasn't perfect but I have tried now I know how easy it is to make sushi and hopefully in the long run its going to save me buckets of cash [Music] a few days later Benjamin catches up with Miriam he's worried about the consequences of her underachieving and suspects that clinging on to childhood dreams is stopping her from moving on in adult life he wants to explore the passion for singing that began when she was a child my worry for Miriam is that if she is still clinging on to childhood dreams then she's perhaps missing out on setting more exciting and more reasonable adult goals for herself he's brought her to a studio to record a track she's written herself [Music] Miriam's always dreamed of singing success but like thousands before her the big record deal never happened it seems that Miriam's really up on the creativity of being here today working in a creative team feeling really challenged being put on the spot and those are all qualities that you can find in other areas in life and other areas perhaps in her work it's just that I don't actually makes any effort to look for them outside of singing because her heart is still set on being a singer [Music] how does that mean yeah it's really good seems to me that there's a slightly kind of childlike quality to this experience you seem very free and creative and quite bubbly it's fun for me this is absolute fun my play time yeah a chance where I can actually just express myself and go and and and just feel totally creative yes that's why I like it so it's kind of like playtime yeah for me it is a play it's my form of playing yeah yeah okay Benjamin suspects it's not just the act of singing itself that Miriam loves he takes her to sing in unfamiliar settings to gauge how she reacts first up its Church and a gospel choir thank you hello [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] when the sessions up how did Miriam rate the experience I suppose what's interesting to think about is what were the differences differences this morning I wasn't on my own trying to create something whereas this afternoon IDO bit already been created so as I was able to fall into a role or a slot a lot easier yeah and I felt that I had actually achieved more this morning to be fair in an hour yeah yeah Benjamin's wondering if the lack of creativity in singing with the choir is why she was resistant to it he decides to up the ante for his last singing session he wants Miriam to busk I'm Carnaby Street swing swing chair we go oh this is just stupid bring some people over for the hand even I can't even think that so louder no I'm not shouting a song that I don't know it doesn't make any sense to be singing this song why not swing low swing low swing cherry girl so I keep going swing cherry thank you coming for to carry me when you have an exactly thrown your hope and salvation I have to say you seem a little bit well let's let's be let's be honest you seem a lot less enthusiastic about this and you worry about being in the studio yes true but it's the same skill is singing so what's different and this morning in this huge I felt very creative because obviously I was able to just use different sounds and think okay next I'm gonna do this or you know but I didn't film for me it's about being totally creative okay so I think what we're seeing from this is that for you it's not enough to just be singing what you really encapsulate in the idea of saying I dreamed of being a singer is saying actually I want to be very personally creative yes I think a really good step forward for us might be to think about separating out singing from being creative something that comes merged together in the studio but by the time you get to Carnaby Street and singing on the street corner song you don't even like much you can realize that singing in of itself is not the goal not the truth yeah there's more to it yeah I wonder if maybe we can think about separating these things out so they can become more practical and more available to you I'm most stimulating to you in your life I do think the breakthrough with Miriam today has been actually seen that her love of singing of being a singer isn't as simple as she maybe thought it was because actually singing per se on its own isn't what she craves and what she's so keen on it's the act of being creative the act of making things happen the act of being perhaps challenged and I do think there's a real connection here between the lack of all that stuff in her life and her thrill-seeking behavior which she particularly plays out with money I feel that for the first time perhaps understanding I need a little bit more creativity or a lot more to feel stimulated and rewarded in my day to day life because right now even though my job is technically meant to be creative I don't feel Craig's answer with Miriam realizing it's creativity she craves rather than just singing Benjamin hopes that she'll take steps to incorporate it into her life jay has just the plan up her sleeve she's brought Miriam to an exclusive Covent Garden boutique but they're not here to shop one of the things that we've been exploring with you is thinking about career development and getting you more focused on that maybe moving up the ladder now we're going to go in here because I've arranged for you to have a chat with Emma who's actually the buyer Wow would that be something that would interest you yes Emma for your master crafts invite she's already enthusiastic so we're halfway there buyers choose the fashions they hope will bring customers into their shops to spend money they can work individually for boutiques like this as well as in big teams for major high street chains we basically go to our buying appointments and shows trips abroad like France Milan Paris and just seeing the collections and getting a feel for what's going on in the next season it's always a season for words a look at Emma's diary proves it's a busy job we're going to me okay I guess New York like three days and seeing my chest I've got partners in my chest there don't clam after New York you've got a day rest and they'll straight off to London Fashion Week yeah it's gonna be a busy time but this is when it gets exciting I mean you've got there's so much sort of fashion going on this if you're a fashion person as you are it's just like it's amazing yeah what would you say the main challenges are with regards to being a buyer and do you think it ever gets stressful for your tour you have to really consider like your budget and you have to decide if you decide that you really like this this entire Balenciaga collection are we gonna pay more for that one and we have to think do you have to cut back on and Chloe maybe Emma has responsibility for spending up to half a million pounds at a time on high-fashion clothes what's more it's not her money and it doesn't end up cluttering up her her so how was that fantastic really really interesting you look quite sort of oh yeah yeah I was really engaged in what she had to say actually but I'm glad that you're thrilled by it because actually we've arranged for you to have an interview to go and work in buying so wood is that okay with you that's fantastic with me yeah happy yeah yeah all right you're on your own [Music] I'd love to shop actually not take the stuff home with Jim by anyway thought to myself that'd be such a cool job a month ago Miriam's finances were spiraling out of control thirty six thousand pounds in debt she was squandering money on sushi and clothes she didn't need life was humdrum and creatively unfulfilling but now it looks like all that's about to change she's finally taking an opportunity to achieve her potential by going for a job that'll not only stop her personal spending but bring in much more cash and pay off her debts much more quickly [Music] the big day finally arrives Miriam's taking a chance to break her cycle of underachieving it's very I'm here for my interview I feel a bit nervous to that entity I also feel really excited about being to you Miriam is being cross-examined by Charlie Gerber of fashion and retail personnel a specialist at recruiting buyers hi Miriam I'm charlie hello nice to meet you don't go through there and take a 6 almost an hour later and it's all over but will Miriam make the grade I'm confident that we'll be able to help Miriam and get her position as a buyer's admin assistant for a retailer and who knows in seven years time she should be able to be ahead of buying earning in the region of 100,000 like I really can't express how excited I am by this whole experience and I just want to go home and read you my CV straightaway and I thank you so much that's all I can say that's all I can say thank you so so much [Music] now it's time for Miriam to report back to Jay and Benjamin so Miriam how did the interview go yeah they really liked me oh good I don't want to sound like a big head but they did and yeah they're gonna put me forward for job thank you thank you for sorting it out as well thank you where do you think your creativity has gone to now with regards to passions like throwing myself into one thing and not really concentrating on the bigger picture I think I've learned that there are things that are just as important as you know going out and having fun and doing a more creative job not something that's a pseudo creative job I think would actually be a lot more enriching for me and I think I'd get a lot more out of life than what I'm getting at the moment and maybe that does have a relationship with your spending yeah absolutely absolutely I think if I was actually buying loads of stuff that wasn't mine I'd enjoy it a lot more because I wouldn't have any debt now finances have you actually got round to setting up the direct debit I have I've set up my director it's I've got my money coming out every month now on a particular date so I'm going to be paying a for my credit card and it means that my parents can get their money back as well so what happens now because obviously you're still finding yourself in shops but how are you controlling your spending I've totally changed my attitude shopping I'm totally over it to a certain degree I'm very aware of what I'm spending now which I wasn't before and now I go into a shop on within about two or three minutes I just can't be bothered you

Channel: Spendaholics

Views: 98,920

Keywords: Spendaholics, Shopaholics, Shopping, Spending, Haul, Addicted, Addiction, BBC, Only Human, Jay Hunt, Benjamin Fry, Debt, Finances, TV Show, Full Episodes

Id: _eIGBUMXyaU

Length: 55min 46sec (3346 seconds)

Published: Thu Mar 19 2020