JONNY NEW ENGLISH - JonTron

oh my goodness I didn't see you there on account of the reason that I can't see you anyways before we get into the video which I'm very excited for you to see by the way I just like to take a second to thank today's sponsor file oh the file you can save tons of money by cutting traditional cable once and for all file allows you to watch all your favorite TV shows in their current season from your laptop phone or television without that outdated cable box to tie you down but John I love overpaying for cable TV I talked to him it get a hold of yourself they tricked you for only $20 a month you get access to over fifty-seven channels for a fraction of the price it's a no-brainer and also for anyone who clicks a link in my description they're giving away a 7-day free trial and 30% off your first month right now I'm watching drunk history on Comedy Central but you may fancy something more like The Walking Dead so show him some love click the link in the description and get watching your favorite TV shows today this is John's New England featuring John and New England I've come here to the historic land of New England some might consider it an update to Old England but sometimes an update is less like an iPhone and more like a Windows Vista the settlers left their homes from far and wide over 400 years ago to sculpt this vast landscape and it was pretty much like back home except with less buildings roads and infrastructure and more wolves bears and Spears chucks directly at their heads but lucky for us here in New Hampshire now they have running water and new hampshire men and new hampshire women have been living together in relative peace and prosperity unless as this sign on the state line dictates you're not living free in which case they'll murder you so why have I come to this land you may ask well I'll tell you it's because I'd like to learn and master the culinary techniques of these great peoples all the while doing it just like the settlers did all those centuries ago by living off the fat of the land itself but to make a good New England clam chowder you need a couple good New England ingredients step 1 gathering plan hunting just living off the good graces of Mother Earth you don't anything but you yourself and your wits that's gonna take a good one it's okay another one just like they living off the land like mom and pop that's a beautiful wonder she's gonna go great in the stew thanks thanks thanks Gaea Thank You Gaea but how you gonna eat a meal if you can't season it so I've come to gather salt at my local salt mine this is like restricted thing you can't go there this is like no you can't go in I mean you couldn't they have to cover it up insult to injury salt in the wound if you will I didn't know you needed the US Coast Guard to guard a little salt newsflash okay we're not monsters just want our soup to taste a little bit better [ __ ] this is private I don't you just live off Flynn right like that's how this Uggla's is I just live off the land right it's looking a bit uh Lance looking a bit barren I the corn or wheat or frankly whatever that was I was hoping for you know a garden of gourds mushrooms cucumbers tomatoes but I'm getting more like a kind of a true noble vibe you know just like the settlers before me I'm just gonna you know make the best of it and hopefully rely on those for sustenance you know keep me through the winter whose get the crossbow crossbow that can be sustenance you stay there you stay there I'm not the land is being hard to live off dude all right it's just starting to piss me off a little undeterred I followed the trails of the exotic wilds of the local Wow Mars must be navajo mother nature finally smiled upon me and laid forth her bounty a bush lacroix dad's rare spices from the Orient and the succulent ham of the see Manatee it was time to take my it was time to take my Goods home that's a bounty and the first thing you're gonna wanna do you gotta get shucking you gonna want to shuck right get those bad boys out it is a strange clam though I will admit but you got it you got to work with what Mother Nature gives you sometimes you get a little reminder God giveth he can take youth away or just give you a pooping a claim now we got to get those bad boys in the pot smell it already I can taste you all right now they've got the clams in there we got to get the rest of our ingredients which I'm sure is frankly something that's how they do it in Japan - onions I know was it like a said Cheerios milk that's just for me though and now the all-important step the clam juice which actually exists for real [Music] it's a oh my they sell it they sell it don't drink it it's pure all-natural but don't drink it some things you just don't do now you just stir that up and you let it sit would you look at that just like mama made it a feast for the eyes and the stomach all right now while we let that simmer we gotta catch ourselves a fish and that's why I've come here to Sanders fish market in Portsmouth New Hampshire so hopefully get one that's at least adequate here we are at the local fish market just like the old days would you consider yourself a fishmonger yes I would so it's not a slur we can still call you that which of these fish tastes the best scallops and shrimp are definitely up there books - scallops is there like a scallop it said wrong see it comes in a shell and it is basically just a big muscle and it's just a clam she's just talking about clams all right he could have shortened it now is this a consensual relationship between you and the fishmongers what kind of what kind of fish is this what kind of fish is this can i buy that guy yeah he's not for sale no can you explain that you got a banana in with your fish yeah well yes you'd like to mix things up here we're a little unconventional liberals when you take the fish's head off is it usually dead it's already died and got it unless it's a crab that's a difference you got against crabs people like to cook them at home so we start by cutting off the face we removed the gills and we rip out their rear now you don't want to get the soft-shell crab treatment so bad it's a bad time to be a soft-shell crab wouldn't you say season is just about over no I just mean in general is there every time you don't cut the face off the soft-shell crab if they want to do it themselves at home sure if they're on good behavior they don't tend to be on good behavior you just are a lady you don't like a soft-shell crab you also like cutting their faces and pull their ears out if you're looking for fresh fish and quality fish stop at Sanders and Portsmouth New Hampshire you heard it here first fish achieved you sit tight I should tide you over in the meantime and we're back in the kitchen ready to make our main entree the New England baked haddock breaded buttered and beautiful now I warn you this is an advanced recipe so if you don't get it on your first try don't be discouraged all right everyone here we go Wow just like mama used to make it before the accident all right well we let this simmer why don't we go take a look around at the local history and learn something because there's plenty of it mm-hmm nothing gets my appetite going like the thought of thousands upon thousands of young British soldiers killing each other over what I would consider to be petty squabbles this is Fort McCleary State Park used in so many wars they've pretty much lost count like the Revolutionary War the war of 1812 the Civil War World War one and the spanish-american war which I didn't even know happened until now I guess we would unfortunately in 1808 they didn't yet know how to build houses as seen by this I mean really what the [ __ ] is this [ __ ] it's not so roofing here and it's just straight it's just straight up ground I wouldn't want to be the rifleman man he had a bad gig nice window though I guess if you want a [ __ ] die of exposure go go go the British are coming we're also the British too which means we're coming oh this is 1605 nuclear bomb button destroyed [ __ ] next time you try to take America look out for [ __ ] London now if you don't excuse me I've got a war of my own to start with the Chipotle burrito I had for lunch victory this is this is literally cleaner than most bathrooms in the tri-state I'd take it I'd take a deuce in that please close when done okay they love compliance here in this state can't forget to wash those hands I'm be cooking soon step 3 to step to eat dinging it's ready a feast fit for a king dig in everyone hold on actually no but I'm looking at it from like this angle it's all wrong it's all wrong understand like nobody from around here would eat this freaking settlers would've eaten this food in his despair John realized there are few things unforgivable in this world unfortunately a poor clam chowder is one of them so John returned to the sea from whence he came join us next time as we explore the dense jungles of Borneo the smoldering pits of man pursue Vyas and the bombed-out wastelands of Atlantic City New Jersey thank you good night so this house that we're staying in I think the owner may have an obsession with like dead and/or wounded and or dying birds because they are everywhere a dead bird number what is this like a dead pheasant this is wild duck shooting okay so I'm gonna count that is two that's two dead or dying or wounded Birds all right this is pheasant shooting we got one two a partridge shooting I'm just gonna count it as a one that's a total of six floor - we got one hanging upside down I'm not sure what's wrong with him another sculpture one hanging upside down that's eight nine ten sleep well another one of the same variety 11 struggling beech narlow peach spermwhale [ __ ] run is that an Amazon River Dolphin what the [ __ ] is going on in this we've got the wounded snipe and the dying Woodcock this is not dead this is not wounded this is passing between worlds that Woodcock that's the one people made the meme out of with me the wood axe I like that video a lot alright so I lost count what's the tally [Music]

Channel: JonTronShow

Views: 6,793,488

Keywords: jontron, jontronshow, jonny new english, travel, new england, new hampshire, maine, funny, travel show, cooking, history, birds, war of 1812, civil war

Id: ll3t8AUJX8M

Length: 12min 34sec (754 seconds)

Published: Mon Apr 29 2019

Reddit Comments

[u/marioloveskirby]

HE “ECH’D” OH MY GOD FUCK YEAH

[u/Kamken]

I can't believe Jon was in my state and I failed to stalk him the entire time.

[u/Tankman987]

Yeah...i'm thinking he's back.

[u/jimbobhas]

I enjoyed this. Just him reacting to some of the bizarre things he found.

Also the fish lady interview reminds me of that picture of ‘this kills the crab’ and it has a little sad face

[u/CM-NYY-DJ-FAN]

"Get access to over 57 channels."

Ad says 58 channels

[u/Alucitary]

The WoodEch video.

[u/Dynamite-chicho]

Consistent uploads.

Would you look at that, just like mama made it

[u/cool6t9]

“Oh I didn’t see you there on account if I can’t see you”

This isn’t even clever why am I fucking laughing so hard

[u/OnyxMemory]

You win the karma race my dude