How To Be A Quality Queen!

my love's hello how are you okay so for those of you that are new hi my name is aja very nice to meet you on this channel we uplift inspire encourage empower one another to level up to value ourselves to know better and to do better so thank you for taking time out of your day to sit and watch me or listen to me speak I really appreciate it it means so much to me more than you know before we jump into this video of course you guys know the routine to follow me on Instagram and that will be right over here and do not forget to subscribe to this channel and turn on the post notifications that you guys know every single time that I post as you can see from the title this video is on how to be a quality Queen that's tougher I didn't do it okay angels so first and foremost I have three categories that I sort of divided this into when I was writing my video treatment and that is physically emotionally and spiritually how to be equality queen so category 1 which is physically this goes without saying you have to look good anything that is quality is attractive which means it has to have the look or the aesthetic of something so you have to keep up your appearance dress well all the time clothes that fit you know when someone's wearing something that's too tight there's a difference between wearing something that's tight versus wearing something that's too tight where it sort of just looks not well it's just something look well like what are you doing what's happening no it's fine it is it's not don't do it put in the effort with your appearance because when you put an effort it shows putting in effort shows people know that it doesn't take 3 seconds to have a very nice hairstyle your makeups done your clothes are well fitting your outfit is nice people know that does it take three seconds Oh naturally you get more respect when you're well put together and it obviously shows because you're putting in the work that you are someone that values your appearance and it means that you are someone that is of quality I know that we all have lazy days but I can promise you that it's so it's so worth it you know me being really feminine in my entire life of course there have been time periods especially when I was like really depressed for I only wanted to wear sweats I never really wanted to wear heels which was very alarming because I am someone that wears heels every day and I'm not exaggerating I literally wear heels every day and it's not because I feel like I have to but it's genuinely because I enjoy it first of all I'm a small girl I'm only 5 foot 2 I like to you know have the height and then take the shoes off and then be my height I love my height personally and I also love the fact that I can throw on shoes and I can be like 3 inches 5 inches 6 inches tall I don't know I could just be taller you know I really like that option you know but what I'm saying is even in days where we don't necessarily want to and we don't want to put in the effort those are the days that we especially should because watch that would be the day where you go out this is especially key if you're single if you're single you're always on the prowl babe even when you don't notice it always carry yourself in a certain way because you don't know who you're going to attract you don't know who you're going to see when you go to that going shoe store when you go to that when you go to that restaurant or when you go to the mall you don't know who you're going to see and that's why it's important to always look good together and to always look the part really it's important and just you know as a reference one of my favorite stores to get clothes from at the moment right now is Zehra or Zara as people say in fact like this blazer is from Zara and I love this outfit okay next category this one is the longest category sit tight okay this is the emotional category of how to be equality queen number one is you're going to lead with femininity I don't know how many times languages ways I can say this but this is so important ladies to lead with your femininity men love to protect and provide especially if they like you that's their job that's what they're supposed to do that's in their nature that's in their biological makeup physiological makeup practically I don't know the right terminology but it's in their makeup so with being feminine being soft-spoken in tone and being a challenge and a mystery these are all things that are going to make you someone that is equality you know I tend to like the 50s for some reason I really love the woman how they dress I just think it's so cute I don't know why I'm naturally drawn to the 50s I feel like as the 90s baby a lot of us have eras and time periods that we really loved and for me it was definitely the fifties I think that the woman were so cute and feminine and they dressed very well and they were very put together and to me it was a time where there was a lot of traditional feminism going on where it was definitely the men's job to provide and work and the woman were stay-at-home moms and got to just watch the kids I just love that whole simple sort of tradition and even in one of my favorite movies which was the notebook Rachel Adams her character I don't remember the name of her character but her character basically I think that took place in the 50s and Noah I think his name was Noah Calhoun which was sexy gorgeous Ryan Gosling he was playing the love interest basically where he was the guy that was trying to get Rachel Adams where mcadams with her name is and if you notice in the movie he had to figure out a whole bunch of creative ways to get her to finally say yes in allowing him to take her out on a date and he just kept pursuing her and pursuing her and she was saying like no like I'm not gonna go on a date with you gotta try harder than that you know still being flirtatious and cute and fun but she wasn't you know rejecting him like get out of my face I don't wanna talk to you like why are you talking to me you know she wasn't doing that she was still being very feminine and still letting him know like I think you're cute but try again you know like that sort of energy and stuff like that is what makes guys you know want to draw to you even more because it's like okay I think she likes me does she like me not enough I gotta try harder so that's like a clue you know it's important to note that a man has no incentive to be chivalrous if you're leading with masculine energy if you're going to act like his equal in terms of how you're treating each other you're he's gonna be you kind of like a male colleague or like a bro you know meaning he's gonna be confused up listen I don't know if I open the door for her she's an open the door for me I don't I I can't figure out the dynamic here we have to kind of play into that role of oh you know very soft feminine to let him open the door for you let him do his job hello this is very important because of how men are made in nature right in our nature we're supposed to be feminine and men love women who are feminine it it's really that cut-and-dry don't be the woman who requires nothing of a man don't be that woman we're all you're requiring is just a man physically nothing else just so you could say well I got a man do you though sounds to me like you have a son you mean have a friend you may have a roommate you may have a buddy you may have a bro you don't have a man because men pay the bills men provide men take the lead that's what men do what is your man doing you guys are buddies you're the other half of the men it hurts I know but it's true trust and love and emotional support do not pay the bills so please spare me before you sit there and get carried away typing well that's not all it takes it ya know whatever two different things for different people you say over there like I said I'm not going to get upset at you for wanting to be with someone who's the manager of Starbucks or Target your boyfriend is a barista he's 45 that's great I and a lot of other girls on this channel my angels we require more that's it so don't get mad at us who are you really mad at maybe you're mad at you maybe maybe that's what we really need to reel into focus here it's you babe you're mad at you you're not mad at us you're not mad at me what I do I'm just speaking my truth my standards and what I believe in and a lot of people agree with me yeah when you lower and deplete and even delete your expectations of a man you lower your expectations for yourself all it does is speak volumes for how you feel about you you instantly become pickme you become a placeholder you become a pick me you become a placeholder until he finds someone that is a challenge until he finds the person that he actually wants to build with the person that he wants to provide for you're just going to keep the seat warm until she gets there right and you know just overall a woman who leads with femininity because that's what they want they don't want a girl that's acting like a dude they don't want that and if he does he's just simply dusty right get the vacuum get the vacuum please don't want anyone being a quality queen you should always keep a man on his toes be desirable with your femininity beauty your youth because honestly without these things you really can't real men in like that you really can't wear them in because why it's as simple as I like that look I like the way you look the first thing before you meet anybody is you look at how they look I like that look I like your face I like your eyes I like your lips I like your teeth that's what you look at you're not seeing people's hearts and they're in size and their character and all these other things the first thing that you're noticing is those physical attributes and being that in society whether we want to accept it or not women are valued first through their beauty and their youth men are valued in society through their success and their well I don't want to hear it say that it's true and at the end of the day you cannot be equality queen trying to be equal to men it just doesn't work like that it just doesn't work like that I don't ya know I've got nothing trying to be equal with men you're right or die mentality I'm going nowhere you're let's split the bill mentality you're I feel bad I just want to help him I know he's going through a lot mentality or unfortunately your PhD in physics is not going to keep a man at the end of the day men get woman and lure them in with sex women get men with relationships write it down quote me it's true and notice parts to win and get the relationship so reel them in these things have to be applied becoming a quality queen is a must you know what I should write a book called the quality queen Bible that should be the title of my book the quality queen Bible who would buy it raise your hand no real I know you guys are always telling me sidebar that I should write a book I think that's what it's gonna be called the quality queen Bible that's it te q Q B ya TQ q v that's gonna be the name of the book the quality Queen available yeah this is what's going to do it babe to sum it up you're going to learn him in with your charm with your beauty with your youth and with your femininity honestly and you know this goes without saying absolutely no intimacy one if you're waiting for marriage no intimacy if you're waiting for marriage I don't care how hot he is I don't care if he says oh well you know I want to marry you anyways so why can't we just do it now because I feel like we're already gonna get married so we might as well just do it now because what's gonna be the difference the difference is what I said the difference is I said no the difference is I hold myself to a certain standard and I'm not going to bend that for you and if you want to stick around great if you don't even better at least I know what you're really here for we can only hide from our true selves but for so long and for others that are not practicing that no intimacy before monogamy and keep in mind don't be fooled by someone trying to be monogamous with you within a week because the younger they are because some guys will try it you know a lot of people have guts and gall will be in a monogamous relationship with you just to get that one thing and then bounce but normally someone that's more mature that's more settled you know they won't even go the distance of waiting the three to four months like Steve Harvey suggested the 90-day rule they won't even go the distance they'll leave well before them but the ones that do the ones that do then you can work out whatever you want to do if that's not your goal waiting until marriage but by no means are you just busting it open world wide just because you like him in fact if you like him that's all the more incentive not to and to remain neutral cuz like I said in my last video when you remain neutral and it's hard I know what I'm saying what I'm saying by no means is easy guys I want you guys to know that and I know that I'm practicing these things myself that's how I come up with half this stuff it's not easy but it has to be done because all this time that you're investing in yourself and you're investing in yourself physically emotionally and spiritually it shows the way you carry yourself is going to be different your aura is going to be different the people that approach you are going to be different now without being said that doesn't mean that another dusty you won't ever try to confront you again because babe who doesn't like nice things so looking better is not going to ward them off it's going to lessen the chances of a lot of them approaching you because they know that they probably can't get you anyway so why even bother going the distance but it's not going to eliminate them you really are a quality Queen and I want you guys to feel this message and to feel the self-love of valuing yourself because you will carry yourself differently so many girls so many DeYoung's get on a daily basis Asia how do I have more confidence how do I become a quality Queen how do I do all these things follow this Bible babe all of this rule of thumb that I'm creating I'm sure this isn't gonna be the first video that I make on this topic and I genuinely will be writing a book on this the quality queen Bible because a lot of you need to hear it and I want to genuinely help you guys I know it's not easy out here it's not easy in the dating world whether you're 16 or whether you're even thirty it's not easy and I get that and I want you guys to know that I get it but at the end of the day no matter how honest and blunt I am and I don't believe in sugarcoating things as many of you can see that doesn't mean that you still shouldn't go the distance it's the road less traveled for a reason anything worth having isn't easy and people of substance and people of value will see that and they'll meet you there they will I also want you guys to keep in mind before we move on to the last category of spirituality if a guy really wants you it doesn't matter if he's sleeping with Becca or whatever the case is if he simply wants you so I've received a lot of teams of girls saying I know you said to wait X amount of time I'm not waiting for marriage but I do want to be with this guy but I feel like if I don't have sex with him he's going to have sex with someone else sweetie more than likely he already is so while he's banging you know all those other girls let him and let him take the time out to hang out with you emotionally getting invested in you courting you doing all of these things for you without that the cuz that way he actually will turn around and say you know what I've been hanging out with let's say myself Asia for the last four months and oh my gosh like I really like her and I don't even need those other girls that I was getting you know whatever from because I really like this girl and I haven't even done anything with her yet and I really really do like her so I think I want to be with her I want to have that talk where I think I want to be serious with Asia no matter what someone is offering no matter how many girls are offering and giving it up and bussing it open worldwide it doesn't matter to a guy if he wants it from you he wants the same thing he's getting from them he wants it from you it is not the same it's not about getting it in period it's about the fact that he wants that specific thing from you so don't be worried don't worry about what other women are doing if he really wants you does that make sense next category spirituality being a quality queen especially someone like myself this is very important to me very crucial to me because my spirituality is number one above anything and everything because that goes hand in hand with my identity my emotional stability mental stability and any challenge that I face in life I root in my faith and my belief in God in Jesus Christ spiritually I believe if you are a Christian you're gonna find your identity in Christ you should find your identity in Christ Asia how do I do that I don't know where to start well for me it started with music something as simple as that yes I grew up in church my entire life I've been going to church consistently since I was three days old four years I still do go to church literally three times a week I'm not saying that makes me a saint that doesn't make me better than anyone that doesn't mean that I don't go through struggles that doesn't mean that I'm perfect that doesn't mean anything I'm just simply saying what I do how I grew up that's just what I do at the current moment when you become rooted in Christ anchored by Christ certain things just can't bother you there are people that I've known in my life that I do see still on a consistent basis and I know that they don't like me and I know they do things to bother me to Jeremy to do all of these things and I cannot get myself to react for some reason I can't get myself to stoop to that level with anyone with relationships with men even though I was only hurt really once annoyed the rest of the times I had so many different opportunities to out this person and to kind of get back at them but I couldn't get myself to do it I cannot get myself to be a vengeful person I can't get myself to be a jaded person and I think a lot of the time you know maybe it does have to do with my personality but I think also it has to do with the fact that I just really believe that God knows everybody so he knows how to handle that person that hurt me hurt you way better than what we can do on our own in our own human nature our own human power he can do way better and I would rather leave it to him than leave it to me and I've always thought that way when you are someone that is equality queen sometimes people just see a certain light in you they recognize a certain light in you and they don't know what it is they can't put their finger on it but it's literally Christ people say that to me all the time I don't know what it is about you but you're just different you're just what are you I'm just a girl that believes in Jesus that's what I am and this even though it's the last category it's number one above everything because we need to be anchored in him so that we can do all the things that we that we want to do dating someone that's successful marrying someone that's successful having your dream life you're a gene career whatever that may be put your faith in Jesus it's gonna do it for you and I know that what I'm saying sounds very cliche it may even sound inauthentic to you but all I can do is share my truth all I can do is help you based off of things I've seen maybe even things I've read and things that are based off of my own experience when you were anchored in a higher power like Jesus you just won't compromise on certain things you just you just can't of course there's going to be times where you will fall and you and you'll get up and you'll make mistakes and you'll learn that's a part of life you will never be perfect I will never be perfect that's okay that is okay but what I'm saying is when it comes to being a vengeful person and all of these things these negative things that peeps some people effortlessly do you just won't be able to do them you just can't get yourself to reciprocate the negativity that others are projecting onto you you just can't I'm unfazed by the amount of people that I've met in my life that have been so jaded it has never jaded me ever ever you know it hurts I get over it with time it isn't easy at the time what I'm dealing with it but I do I get over it I'm here I'm living doing great you want to be a quality team because you want to be respectable and it's important to not let anyone into your space and let everyone into your space and take pieces of you because that's what you're doing you're sharing energy with people every time you encounter them especially exchanging energy with people when you're being incident with them and you're letting them into your space it's not just something that's physical it is spiritual and if you look at it from that aspect do you want to be a part of the people that you're letting into your space like that do you want their qualities within you do you want to possess anything that they have when you know that no good NOAA is cheating on you constantly and you're sacrificing yourself and your moral compass you or even your intuitive feelings is it worth it think about it so guys that is the end of this video thank you so much for watching of course do not forget to leave any comments concerns suggestions in the comments section below and of course if you haven't already and you this is your first video but you're watching of mine or even if it's not and you have not subscribed yet please subscribe we are on the road to 30 K and we are so close and I know that we can get there and of course guys do not forget that I love you and God loves you and I'll see you guys in my next video [Music]

Channel: Asha Christina

Views: 135,286

Rating: 4.8673601 out of 5

Keywords: level up, relationships, relationship advice, advice, beauty, quality queen, queen

Id: UGbktN4Jgtg

Length: 28min 11sec (1691 seconds)

Published: Sat Mar 09 2019