Episode 155 - Twitch Stream Meltdown

what's up guys welcome to the tmg podcast this is actually today's episode today's free episode but if you want uh the bonus episode that went up today as well you can find that on our patreon that's patreon.com tinymeatgang and uh the free episode will be ad free as well on there so uh and if not thanks and enjoy this one peace peace and we're live breathe just don't breathe okay just focus okay it's gonna be okay um just give just gonna give a big old [ __ ] you to um microsoft and apple for that matter uh for making this stuff so difficult that's all i know i know i up dude i had a meltdown on stream the other day because i updated i updated my computer and it just [ __ ] everything i was ready to put my fist through my monitor man i could not believe i was i was so annoyed i'm like how do you update your computer and it's supposed to make it better and it ruins everything oh yeah man anyway that [ __ ] that [ __ ] is just that like used to plague my my dad because like he would do everything on windows and he's like writing code on there and stuff like that and he's using a specific version or he was doing like art and code and all this crazy [ __ ] right so he's using a specific version of of um photoshop too and it's also like you get really used to one version of a program right yeah like you ever get super used to a version of premiere and then they upgrade it and all the [ __ ] buttons are in the wrong places and you're like yeah you're like well that's cool you're like what no yeah and now all the updates are automatically updating you boot your [ __ ] up one day to do some like crucial work and all of a sudden the [ __ ] crop buttons in a different place and you're like what the [ __ ] yeah anyways welcome to the software hour yeah but you know what they need is like they need like little podcasts like mobile pods and little streaming pods yeah yeah that's what they need yeah like a little like like what like a pop-up little booth that you can like go anywhere and just pop it up and then just [ __ ] stream yeah it's it's like that private conference booth they have in you know like offices but it's it's for streaming and it's strictly to be a nuisance in public yeah you pop it up in the middle of the [ __ ] fourth street promenade pop it up yo what's good i'm live i'm live i'm live i'm live i'm live i'm live i'm live going to be ripping some minecraft with the general public [Laughter] dude i'm sorry i just have i had a good ass chuckle about this in the shower which means i was chuckling with my dick out but you know that's a that's a whole other but i was thinking that's a good visual you know just your just your boy having to chuckle with his penis out the penis truck it's a good pizza it's funny i'm thinking about myself chuckling in the shower and everything's jiggling you know [Laughter] everything everything's jiggling stomach neck chin balls dick on top of the balls yo laughing hard as hell naked is a super vulnerable thing i've never felt never felt so open about my feelings than being butt ass naked oh yeah tapping my ass off oh yeah that's great no covers no nothing you just yeah just naked in the rain in the rain i mean you know my personal rain whatever the shower is okay rain's like you know showers like a rain machine right for some reason i was picturing you outside just saying but i see now you made it weird so you made it weird no i'm not thinking like i'm not thinking like music video status i'm thinking like crazy person [ __ ] status you know just laughing maniacally to themselves naked in the rain yeah so you know i'm having a good i'm getting a good old penis chuck okay about i was thinking you know so i didn't really i didn't get to watch the debates last night and i'll see oh my god dude yeah oh man you missed something good yeah i i i don't know maybe i'll watch it on stream or something i don't know but i was uh i was just you know i i saw everyone's tweets and posts about how dumb everything was whatever it was gonna be like twitter sorry go ahead no no no what did you say he's always gonna be twitter what i thought there was gonna be a bunch of twitter highlights from it i didn't see a single one yeah yeah it was kind of like we could probably turn this off because it was so infuriating to listen to that i was like we could probably just turn it off and just see the good parts on twitter or if there's like comedy highlights or something like that because it just like that's how much you're not getting from it as a as a citizen you know what i'm saying as a civilian i'm not a citizen but you know what i'm saying i'm watching with a citizen and i'm like we're just not getting this is so like unfair to the voters it's like yeah we don't they're just bickering they're like [ __ ] yeah it was it was so weird it was like a you know classic like just pissing match and they're calling each other names and it was just you know reminded me of like trying to interpret that was like trying to interpret you know instructions from your from your teammate as the other two in the squatter and the gulag also trying to communicate with each other you know what i'm saying you're watching that other thing about is cod you're like man i've been in this situation [Laughter] sir please stop spamming the mic you stop spamming the mic comms comms comms com stops where is he where's he where is he comes guys shut up shut up shut up okay [ __ ] good luck doesn't matter right now this is like really like a [ __ ] two on four right now just shut the [ __ ] up your teammates are like left he's left he's back left he's back left and you're like [ __ ] off that sort of felt like trying to get any info any real info from that but anyways keep going sorry what were we going to say no so i just i was having my chuckle because i was laughing what if within the first minute you know the broadcast begins and they have the music and they walk out on stage and all that and then say tonight we're here with blah blah blah do that whole thing you know everyone's like built up to this moment and then within 30 seconds of the first question the two of them just go full dementia and [ __ ] their [ __ ] pants [Laughter] just take a fat ass dump in their pants mr president will start with you how do you feel about like oh [Applause] i mean dude that's kind of what happened like i know but no like what happened but i mean literally like if he just [ __ ] his pants and then biden just thought he was in the like in a urinal and just stepped to the side and pulled his hog out and just started peeing on the ground and he was like you can't miss if you're a foot away [Music] damn i think that's what honestly i think that that's what people like kind of you know like i feel like trump keeps calling him you know what is it sleepy biden and stuff like that i feel like people kind of yeah like he paints him as such like an and conservative twitter just constantly repost videos of him like [ __ ] up his they actually the both sides do it right so i'm pretty sure that's what everyone expected for these two guys to go up there and just like [ __ ] their pants but they were both like i mean like biden especially like put on a good showing he definitely like impressed for sure really yeah i mean you know the clips i've seen him like on you know on like news broadcasting stuff like fumbling words and just like forgetting what he's saying and stuff like that and then like everyone talking about him and being in his basement or whatever the [ __ ] it is you know i'm like damn is this he's he gonna get get up there and just completely embarrass him [Laughter] i'm sad they didn't [ __ ] themselves man i know man mr president uh joe would you like to [Applause] he's just staring out into the abyss mr biden is it's your time go ahead and just [ __ ] you have two minutes and he just turns to the side and just walks towards the side stage and someone comes out and turns him back they put a bus stop on stage just like that like those dementia hospitals like they're like just in case any either of them tries to leave um they'll get caught up and think they have to wait for the bus is that true yeah man there's a there's like a famous one i think it's in i don't know where it is actually but they had they put a bus stop outside the hospital it's like a preventative measure so and did it work i assume it works you know it's just a fake bus stop that's some [ __ ] i mean that'd be really funny to just keep up a bus stop that doesn't work and either for dementia people or patients or dementia people or just you know it doesn't it's not part of the bus system either like if you're just a random tourist and you're like oh you could probably hop on here it's just one big milk prank yeah it's just a live stream actually that would be really funny that would be like a good like art installation non-functioning bus stop somewhere and just stream stream it all day yeah and people who have to work standing at it being like um what's the deal bro yeah and rich people just sit there and watch it no no it needs to be a fake bus stop for uh for like uh uh like one of those bar bicycle things what do they call those oh barcicle yeah barcicle but it's almost there yeah i couldn't put the two together they just they need to prank it so the barcicle has 10 actors on it and it sits at that stop and it leaves and then people go oh like you know and then there's a sign on it says every 15 minutes and this [ __ ] just never comes back people waiting to get on a bicycle yeah and put that [ __ ] in santa monica like party bicycle pay as you go you can get off or stay on and or what if it's a bicycle that never ends [Laughter] like they you hire some host that is supposed to his only job is to like maintain energy and and be a host for like as long as he can possibly go like hours hours 10 hours he's still like blowing the horn and like come on folks on our left is the santa monica airport and we're just like six hours in people were like i don't understand we run out of booze just just take them from [ __ ] santa monica to goddamn south bay just deep hours away from where they were [ __ ] up on the 405. all right on our left is santa barbara [Laughter] never ending barcicle i know there's i know there's one person here loves alcohol it's like that sounds like a damn good time yeah until you run out that's what i'm saying what happens when you you know hit the last bottle of long branch what do you do [Laughter] matthew giggles um our boy matthew giggles man so sam told me you guys bet on the fight this weekend yeah we did he was like he was like bugging out on me he said man what do i bet what do i bet what do i bet i know dude and i was like this is a tough one dude you just you don't know how it's gonna go do you not that one i mean i wanted to favor izzy and i had faith and i went and re-watched a bunch of paulo fights and i was like paolo's got power and he'll he'll push but yeah when i heard izzy say uh dude he's fought like you know standing bags his whole career i was like yeah it's pretty true like like paolo's never fought anyone i don't know i don't know what you said ending bags what is that like as in like the guys he's fought against will just stand in front of him and like if paulo hits them they'll hit back and i see you know izzy's whole thing was like i'm gonna move and i'll escape and you know i'm gonna be limber and it was crazy i mean he he didn't even check one of those kicks he just ate them all i don't to me he had like this weird like standing in the mirror [ __ ] like he got all psyched out and then when it was time to go i feel like he just forgot everything that he had practiced yeah how do you like how do you block the leg kicks like that though is that what you're talking about oh no no when those like that so when izzy just kept chopping down his left calf yeah he um he was having problems with it going into the fight so i see so paulo didn't even like lift up his leg or like shin or like attempt to check it because when you when you check leg kicks it hurts both of you but it demotivates the other fighter to keep doing i see so he just let izzy pick that thing apart his leg looks rough like two of those kicks in because he's like look at his [ __ ] calf right now the other thing bright red yeah i mean the other thing is like you know i won't go too long but you know izzy is a physical [ __ ] phenom i mean i feel like it's worth talking about in that regard but the thing is is he that what most people understand izzy is so [ __ ] long like he's tall as [ __ ] no picture really does him justice i think he told me uh man i don't let me let me get his height what weight class are they in the middleweight middleweight okay so how tall is the uh or whatever polycosta um he's probably he's six and izzy is six four but six units of height yes six units yeah okay he's six four minecraft blocks okay six four duplo blocks yeah we just gotta start measuring height and other [ __ ] yeah we can say we're also six yeah yeah he's like 72 sim uh the sims inches okay i got it yeah dude we're six in the sims yeah yeah but it's like the way his six four is laid out you know what i mean like he's like long as legs yeah so you know that man it's like i don't know it's like fighting someone from the fantastic four like that dude it's just it's insane so i in to paulo's defense i mean i still think he could have checked some of that [ __ ] but it's probably like a scary thing like because if you lift up your leg against a guy that tall you know then you're you know his arm is long enough to sock you in the face and you you can't punch him back so yeah the head kick too quick that [ __ ] rattled this [ __ ] and it was a rap i was yeah that was crazy yeah i so like after the fight i guess i i don't i didn't know anything about both of them but i know like you went on about how you know izzy is is great after his last fight and basically his story why they call him the style bender and all that [ __ ] right yeah and so then i started watching the promo for the fight and how like and i started getting into the memes of the whole thing about how like paulo said he was a black belt and he took it out at the at the press or whatever yeah through through a white belt at izzy and there's kind of like a meme because people were like some people were like doesn't matter it doesn't matter what [ __ ] belt you are and then the other side was like no it really matters if you're a black belt you'll definitely he's gonna take him down like crazy and and [ __ ] him up or whatever and then i got into the [ __ ] memes that izzy was posting after the fight of him oh my god emotion he did where he like [ __ ] him in the ass yeah he humped him you do when he tweeted black i was crying laughing i know i know i was like what the f holy [ __ ] and then he posted that picture of raw dog where the a is him it's like it's like a little clip art of him pumping him dude bro oh it was it was personal it was so personal and and and i think izzy because he had a chip on his why why is he had a chip on his shoulder i think because his last fight with joel romero people were saying that he was a runner he was this he was afraid um it wasn't a great fight great fight for him he he took a couple from yoel that like touched him and he didn't like that power so he's like [ __ ] so he you know he did what he had to do and he kind of went on points and joel was such a big dude that when whenever izzy would hit him it didn't look like it hurt so i think you know i think that's why izzy kept going on about like oh everyone thinks that you know you got to be this jack [ __ ] like out of an action film to win a fight you don't have to be that blah blah and uh you know so he did he did it for skinny boys and he did it for himself he did it for long boys he did it for the long boys yeah god damn dude black brother he pumped him he humped him i was i mean that was he was that was more than humping dude that was straight up like like simulation doggy style sex oh yeah he [ __ ] him in the ass he let him know i mean my man's face was on the ground his ass was in the air he was doing what he was saying he was doing all those tick tock dances ass up and he was like and izzy just gets back and just does two full humps and then celebrates the win grind on me no he does two humps and then he [ __ ] does a head spin yeah he does he does a little like break dancing no windmill yeah sorry yeah bro and then when his uh when paulo's coaches were like oh we're still coming for you he goes he's like you can't i'm gonna come all over your [ __ ] face [Laughter] you know what dude these days it feels like shopping online is the only shopping we really do am i right yeah it's very true i mean come on that's where today's sponsor honey comes in it's the free browser extension that scours the internet for promo codes and automatically tests them out when you're checking out online it's um it's basically your best friend when you're shopping online no i'll tell them how it works yeah so basically you get honey on your computer for free two easy clicks then when you're checking out on one of over 30 000 supported sites honey pops up and all you have to do is click apply coupons you wait a few seconds as honey searches for coupons for that site if honey finds a working code it's going to apply the best one to your cart um you guys know this we've used it for a ton of things i've you know i mean cody and i've gone at length about this clothes appliances studio gear you name it we also have to shout them out for paying for our entire new music they also support our new music videos so yeah big thanks to them you can use it dude download this [ __ ] seriously just as a thank you to us yeah from from us to them and it would be i mean just also it's awesome it just works so it's simple if you have a computer honey should be on it it's free and it works with whatever browser you use you can get honey for free today at jointhoney.com tmg that's joinhoney.comtmg to let them know that we sent you and uh thanks honey for supporting today's episode and for paying for our music video we appreciate that yes thank you dude i cannot believe the amount of dweebs in mma [ __ ] all these dudes in the comments going oh what's such unsportsmanship like it's like bro they they're paid to [ __ ] kill each other i mean listen yeah it is though what do you mean it is it it's [ __ ] hilarious but it's straight up disrespectful but you i you want to see that [ __ ] yeah what kind of person what kind of person is like i don't wanna it's it's much better when they get up and they shake hands afterwards no what do you mean you want the drama what do you yeah i want real wrestling that's what this is you know what i'm saying yeah no that was everyone there's so many people in the comments like um he's selling sportsman like it's not good for the sport man it's like yeah it is it's great for the sport oh yeah people people watch mma because then [ __ ] people like me watch it that's another viewer you know i'm saying i wouldn't paid for that fight if i didn't you know i mean i did but i'm saying like you know now i'm gonna watch it izzy's next one for sure yeah no you're sure you know bro it the the formula is proven with wrestling no one wants a [ __ ] yeah we fight a great fight and you know training camp no one likes that [ __ ] you know why people talk about jon jones because he did [ __ ] cocaine he got popped for roids and he you know he did a hit and run and i'm not i'm not condoning any of that i'm just saying people like the [ __ ] madness so when i see people go this is bad for mma specifically that point i'm like it's actually not it makes people want to watch this [ __ ] because it looks like a circus yeah has mma ever been like it's not it's just not in its genes to be respectful and no [ __ ] fight is respectful bro they had they had kicking in the nuts at the start of ufc and then eventually they took it out see that's what i'm talking about they got to put that [ __ ] back in i i know man they put it again they got to put a nut stomping man some of the early fights some of the early fights bro oh really dude yeah oh my god he pulled the ex he pulled the exploding grapes move oh oh man that's the winery windsor right there he's just stopping he's just stomping his nuts yep and he's gonna he's gonna put his penis they call it the winery windsor because after he stomps his nuts he's gonna take his penis wrap it in between his toes like a double wins or not and he's gonna there he goes now his penis is in a knot there's not much he can do from here they call him the merlot mason this guy is an absolute jackhammer [Laughter] with his forehead with his forehead just slamming the guy's full nuts it was a good fight man i'm glad i watched it and i'm glad that you won i lo so not that i'm an expert on fighting at all but so in boxing i'll like you know my coaches will try to she has complexity right and so she'll add you know slips and and rolls and stuff like that and i'm not you know there are days where i'm just like [ __ ] off and and i'm not all there and i'll like i'll miss a roll and i'll run into her forearm yeah [ __ ] and i'm like dude it makes me laugh when i see people online say dude izzy just grazed him i'm like bro let that dude six four from high up graze your temple with full force and see if you [ __ ] make it like yeah yeah i run into a four a stiff forearm and i go well that oops you know i don't want to do that again yeah yeah the weight the word grazing means you didn't get it eat it you probably didn't get any brain damage but it still [ __ ] hurts yeah like it doesn't take much to knock your ass out man yeah so good but man that i mean that punch it was wild i did not think that's how it was gonna be i i thought izzy was you know i thought he would do like some similar like what he did to bobby knuckles when he like was off the back foot and just [ __ ] clink like got him coming in but the the weird like it looked like a [ __ ] like two guys like slipping in water i was like and then he just hit him and then he was out i watched the replay like so many times i couldn't really figure out what happened he just like like does he hit him with the left the left is he's like going for almost like an uppercut it looks almost like an uppercut just with the way he's built and like it just lands like wait were you saying people were saying that that was the grace yeah people were like oh yeah you touched him that's what i'm saying to me it looked like it it looked like they didn't even he didn't even hit him and but he was like lights out so i was wondering if something else happened earlier that i missed no maybe it was the kick or something no he like he like i mean so i think the kick that kick when it cut him open you saw paulo's eyes like i felt like his soul left his body after that kick like he took that kick and i i heard the word come out of his eyes he was like oh [ __ ] uh oh oh oh oh i i got 17 more minutes of this oh my god he cartoon gulped yeah [Applause] when it hit him just like bowing slide whistle [Laughter] dude i think up until that kick he was like i'm just waiting my time waiting for my time i want a number one with cheese and like just he was just somewhere else hit something it just [ __ ] hits him in the it's like i'm waiting for my turn waiting for my turn hitting the head uh yeah i'm just waiting for the number four line it just takes this completely somewhere else i always bring this [ __ ] up like one of the early ultimate fighter seasons dude gets knocked out so hard and they're like where are you he's like ohio oh no he was in las vegas oh no no he thought he was back home dang yeah so yeah i think yeah i think paulo was just so rocked from that [ __ ] and then that thing just landed flush on like either the temple or the jaw it was just like a perfect like boom yeah right on the nerves lights out dang yeah dang dang dang yeah bro can't say it enough no it was a great fight yeah i'm glad i like you know i just wish i mean what do i do how do i know when there's fights coming up i just saw some some random tweet or some [ __ ] about izzy and i was like oh that dude's fighting again but i i i don't know like it's they're well ufc is dog [ __ ] at marketing but they see what i'm saying they are i know when there's a big [ __ ] playoff game or whatever you know well that's different i guess but they're virtually like almost every saturday but but yeah the big fights i mean i would say they also like take time to put together it's not entirely on the ufc like the good ones come up only so often but i think that's right at fight island yeah yeah okay wow abu dhabi um i believe connor is fighting floyd mayweather yes no i no no wait yeah was it floyd no no he's announced that he's fighting manny manny that's what it was sorry he already i don't know if that's real but what i did read was let me and let me verify this [ __ ] supposedly connor um is fighting dustin poirier who that guy fought khabib and he he got close but yeah i don't know it could just be a [ __ ] rumor but i think connor's trying to fight again i think it's an ego thing for him yeah yeah hang it up you know yeah he should have just you know you should just try it just like man i want to try my hand at boxing didn't work out um you know what a tire bro yeah just shut the [ __ ] up i'm kidding i can't even imagine what it would be like to be in that position i could imagine i'd probably do the exact same thing just try as hard as i can to keep it going just by some stroke of luck he wins and he sort of revives his career a little bit or his fighting career at least you know i don't think it would feel good to have a little victory lap i don't i don't think there's any way to do that because that division now is is a murderer's role he he like got around the hard parts and it's you know yeah yeah i'm gonna say his career is definitely more show because he didn't really fight the guys that are like really tough like like tony ferguson i think would actually i don't know about tony you're probably maybe gonna be tony but we don't have to go down into this but like yeah let's say sorry sorry [ __ ] there is one coming up though justin could be boy oh yeah so that's happening gaichi khabib yeah that shit's gonna be oh that's gonna be when's that coming up um i don't know let me look that up and then we can leave fighting alone but and then let's talk about maybe something that's coming out oh yeah we got a bigger fight coming up yeah yeah that oh [ __ ] that's in about less than a month october 20th oh let's go yeah i was gonna be good ladies and gentlemen you know we saw one leaf fall on the ground yesterday so that can only mean one thing fall is finally coming it's time to get your boo boo tees your boot you got that boo t yeah it's like a scary ass booties dude stop saying that you're scaring the [ __ ] for the spookiest time of the year with the softest undies to grace your scary ass bottom your boot'em me on these knows exactly how to celebrate a season with the coolest prince of colors and the softest onions known man they want you to be comfortable in every way express yourself every day and in every way coding i'm rocking i'm rocking them right now dude and there's as hell and i've and they're also very spooky i got the halloween print on right now and my ass is scared but it's it's not because it's comfort it's comforted you know what i'm saying um it's like it's it's getting scared but then you give it some candy like it was trick or treat my ass is trick-or-treating so i'm trying to say anyways their undies they grow in trees no seriously they're made from irresistibly soft natural fiber sourced from beechwood trees and you know what natural fibers mean it's that their micro model is not only super soft but breathable light and impossibly cozy never run out of me undies with the meundies membership a subscription that sends new pairs right to your door plus get site-wide savings and exclusive sales keep your eyes peeled for the spooky cool halloween prints seriously keep those eyes peeled for those things man you never know when they're going to jump out at you you know what i'm saying yeah me undies is a great offer for our listeners right now any first-time purchasers 15 off and free shipping this is a no-brainer especially because they have a 100 satisfaction guarantee get your 15 off your first order and 100 satisfaction guarantee go to meetundies.com tmg that's me undies.com tmg but what is coming out friday yeah what's going on tell the people what's coming out our new song sofia which just for the record we did not come up with after i played [ __ ] detroit become human we actually this idea came about immediately after broke [ __ ] it was on the set of broke [ __ ] hold on dude i'm just restarting my camera real quick oh yeah it's fine i'll just keep going with this we we um we were sitting on the set of broke [ __ ] and we were sitting with our producer aiden and i was like man what if we did like some crazy because aiden was telling me these weird meta music video concepts and i was like dude what if we did one and it was just like ai robots for the video girls and originally we were joking like cody and i were joking like oh man like what if their heads were just straight up like [ __ ] ipads and yeah oh yeah that was a little solar panel like no little segways with ipads on them yeah yeah it's just like just weird but uh you know quickly you know i figured out vfx on that would have been way too much money so uh i knew that wait actually hold on one second pause real quick i think the original idea wasn't the original one to have all the video girls be like super old yeah yeah oh yeah yeah yeah yeah that was an idea yeah it was one where we want to do like a tiger type music video like around a pool yeah but it's like us in like 10 or like 30 like 80 year olds but i think someone had done that already yeah so i was like ah so then yeah so then yeah that's what kicked it off and then i was like okay what if they're all like robots because it's just sort of like a you know not so subtle commentary on [ __ ] everyone's obsession with sex robots and stuff at the time so i knew about sophia and i was like whoa that name is kind of you know it's kind of a pretty ass name so what if we just sort of you know do a play on that so the whole track is uh uh double aunt andres yes yeah yeah and also i guess we won't say too much about the video because when this comes out if people are listening thursday night then you wouldn't have seen the video yet so yeah watch it tomorrow and let us know what you think i think you gave like a general enough idea yeah that the video is yeah that um [Music] man talk about a [ __ ] day oh that was stressful right in the middle of that [ __ ] i was like is this gonna happen oh yeah we won't give it away but this doesn't give anything away but in the middle of it something just wasn't clicking and you know what nima is like super perfectionist right so i have a skewed perception of what he thinks is good yeah and i just have to say this so when he was bugging on that setup and he was like it doesn't look good and i'm looking at the monitor and i'm like i see why you think it's not perfect but i think it's it's solid let's just let's print it and let's move forward so we hit it and we're losing time and i could see he's really frustrated so i step aside with him i'm like what's up and he's like he's like i just it's not that good man he's like i feel like i'm [ __ ] up i'm like bro no one's gonna judge you as hard as you're judging yourself right now and he just he won't he can't let it go so we come back we go to lunch and we come back and then he kind of figures it out and then after he figures it out and when i saw the difference i go oh yeah yeah the other which set up was it again so it was when we see the one that took for [ __ ] ever right it was yeah and it was it's like the main area and where we see the main character of the video yeah and and it's it was like in that and it just you know it just does it just wasn't hidden and then when he figured it out that's what turned all the footage over and and that's what gave us that crazy ass look and we're like oh damn this looks like a fire yeah yeah so um you know shout out to nema and yeah shout out to nemo because we know you're listening to this yeah by the way we [ __ ] know it and you know we trashed him last episode so i don't think we trash him we didn't trash him no we didn't no we did but you are a little [ __ ] boy yeah you are a little punky you're a little punk ass [ __ ] you're a little [ __ ] cry baby [ __ ] it doesn't look good it doesn't look good it doesn't shut up man i'm coming in a river dog but also thanks for thanks for shooting this video yeah but also art isn't real bro and like your whole career is a [ __ ] farce so like stop complaining and be happy with what you got but like we love you though thank you man thank you so much for your hard work more like dick dick [ __ ] [Laughter] this doesn't mean anything more like more like uh [ __ ] um dow jones dp more like doesn't put out good material [Music] [ __ ] oh brother oh brother this guy stinks more like doesn't poop i haven't seen you take a single [ __ ] [ __ ] yeah man ever dude where's your butthole dude do you even have a butthole [ __ ] in front of me if it's real yeah dude put that on a t-shirt [ __ ] in front of me if it's real [Laughter] if it's real [ __ ] in front of me dude the uh um we oh yeah yeah right we probably should talk about that no actually you can talk about that now just don't don't say what the prosthetic is oh yeah no i'm all i want to talk about is the material used to put that on your body i like kind of [ __ ] rash after that [ __ ] came off oh yeah did you i don't know if you were that way it was just like sticky and yeah it shit's he was like he's like you're gonna break out in that area by the way if you don't clean it off with alcohol or something and i was like what it's like 2 a.m i'm not gonna go home and clean my neck with hydrogen peroxide right now i'm gonna [ __ ] go to bed with the makeup on yeah that doesn't look sus as hell coming in at 2 am rubbing [ __ ] uh rubbing alcohol in your neck what are you doing i mean it was a it was a it was a set piece it was a set prop [Laughter] uh just on your neck yep just on my neck just on my neck just right it's a hickey god damn it i'll just it's a hickey i'm sorry [Laughter] [ __ ] hickey man i haven't no but we can say this we can talk about the fact that the the piece that was built for the main character modeled around a certain part of the body and we had someone that we can't you know we did this song like a year ago now yeah yeah yeah way sooner yeah yeah yeah that's happened and no we couldn't do a shoot for it yeah yeah that's another thing i want to make very clear before anyone starts making comparisons about this that and whatever this [ __ ] was done in the can i'm gonna get the exact date i'm gonna get the exact date hold on yes please do this came out you're curious this was forever ago homie hold on hold on hold on hold on it's way way back way way back way way way back bro you're not gonna [ __ ] believe this [ __ ] i bet can i guess the final was complete yeah take a guess like january yeah like the final came to us february 21st and like that was after changes and stuff but like you know that i would say it was fairly minor so was it nine months cause there was a there was a gap like we had done work on it and then we left it hanging and then we we picked it back up and we finished it and and yeah bro the day we recorded was january 19. oh no no january 26th [ __ ] hell damn that's not great yeah that's just been sitting for 10 months now that's pretty wild man but i think that's actually kind of normal no it's normal it's very normal yeah so people work on [ __ ] and i mean people that do it and that's that's their only thing that they go in the studio every single day yep like they build up a catalog of like thousands of [ __ ] songs and then they just yeah i think i don't know i don't know i got made fun of last time for pretending to know about music so i'm just not gonna say [ __ ] about it oh by who who said what some patreon comment that was like dude it's so funny hearing cody talk about the industry it's like it's literally like we have been involved in it for the last couple years i mean yeah we're not speaking solely from our experience bro yeah we brushed a lot of shelters man yeah exactly we've heard a lot of different things before they came out yep so um you know this neither here nor there but uh you know i think it depends on the artist like i think a guy like you know like probably i would actually think less people who are focused less on the artistry i feel like they have more tracks i feel like you know a guy like tyler the creator i feel like he's got a library of just like 30 second you know 10 second ideas you know like oh i a song with this could be cool and then it goes nowhere whereas i feel you know like a straight up rapper like someone like tory lanez who just oh because he streams his he streams oh yeah we could talk about his album in a second but before back like back like a year and a half ago or whatever when he was like twitching all of his recording sessions yeah and he'd literally go in and make like four songs and freestyle every single one of them and then just bank them and then leave come back the next they do the same thing i mean like even it's like when he wants to do it out would he down down in the kitchen somewhere by my wallet i think uh well oh yeah yeah yeah and so he's just pumping out i think when he wants to do an album it's like besides this newest one it's just like literally go to the hard drive pick 12 tracks and release them i mean yeah i mean i think you know even i mean even the story of wiz khalifa when he made black and yellow he forgot what producer he was working with but i think he did that song and another big song in the same night and uh uh he was just sort of speaking of the fact of like you know oh yeah you you just gotta you just gotta get it done you know and and yeah i think it's that ability for artists is crazy like the the ones that have staying power i feel like those are the ones that just like can go in and clock into 16. like even [ __ ] black bear when we sent him short kings anthem that [ __ ] came back in 24 hours like there you go wild that was wild can we wait can we just say this real quick hold on what i don't want you know i don't want to toot our own horns or anything like that i don't want to tude our horns too much right all right but i'm going to do a little tooting right now okay walkman almost 60 million on on spotify that's [ __ ] ridiculous short kings short king's about to hit 40 million that's what on spotify is unreal that is crazy i mean that's [ __ ] crazy broke [ __ ] is that 22. that's what you were doing you remember doing no fly sorry i this is [ __ ] so shitty of me to do right now just going through our own stats dude wow we're killing it but it's just weird to think that we made remember we've made no flex we're in christian's apartment yeah and we're piecing together the song we made it you know whatever one did you ever think that song would have 15 million streams no i mean that's [ __ ] crazy yeah honestly it is i mean when we made that [ __ ] i'm like oh yeah people will like this that like the podcast the same stay stable here almost has nine which is insane it's still man it's really cool it's really uh just a blessing and an honor yeah yeah to do this music with you and i think that um and i'm excited about this new song and i'm pumped to see whatever comes next you know yeah it's a it's a man what a what a trip bro just starting it as a like just because and then it just kind of kept going oh yeah it's just wild yeah and um even just coming up with the concept like executing it and and it just everything has been wild it's crazy um and so the finished product will come out friday it's not even done it's still in the process of there we're two days away this is like this is how it always goes right yeah we didn't have a lot of time we didn't have a lot of time no um it was basically like once cove had started like you know lightening up a little bit the producer figured out how to get um not lightening up but as soon as we figured out how to get like instant tests yeah we had like a little station where everyone on set had to get tested which probably cost us like what thousands of dollars oh yeah it was definitely expensive just with the amount of people we had on set and stuff listen guys when money's tight investing in yourself may not be top of mind but mental health is a necessity not a luxury and guess what taking care of yourself doesn't have to break the bank investing in your mental health has long-term benefits and with talkspace it can actually be affordable changing change is constant but in the new normal it feels like there's something new to grapple with every day yes and with talkspace online therapy connect with a licensed therapist for a fraction of the price of an in-person therapy session you can get matched with your perfect therapist from the comfort of your device and reach out 24-7 whenever something's on your mind um this one's cool because when we started doing reads for talk space we actually got a ton of feedback from people saying that it actually helped them you know and maybe you're not ready to discuss super personal things but maybe this is the you know an opening for you if you're going through some stuff even to just work out situations in your mind you know maybe more yeah if not just to talk to somebody you know yeah yeah if you have always a good thing yeah if you have immediate doubts about yourself for your career and stuff and it you know it helps to sort of unravel all that and set your mind straight so you know um and and it's a fraction of the cost of in-person therapy instead of waiting for an appointment you can send unlimited messages to your therapist 24 7 and then they'll engage with daily with you five days a week and now talkspace covers 40 million people for online therapy through their insurance or employer wow uh the talkspace network is composed of thousands of licensed therapists who have experience in over 40 specialties including but not limited to treating depression anxiety substance abuse trauma relationship issues food and eating and much more it's secure and private using the latest encryption technology to store client information yeah and you know it always helps to have someone to talk to and talkspace wants to give you that kind of support especially everyone deserves that kind of support and at a price they can afford so as a listener of this podcast you can get 100 off your first month on talkspace uh that's to help you find your perfect therapist go to talkspace.com or download the app make sure you use the code tmg to get 100 off your first month and show your support for the show but mostly show support for yourself that's tmg and talkspace.com hey dude have you ever watched the office the office is a i was trying to do it yeah yes of course i have if you have you probably know it's based on a uk series called the office i bet you didn't walk because you're not you're not niche enough for that stuff that's niche comedy baby but what if i told you there are nine other countries with their own versions of the office that you've never seen well you probably didn't know that or about them at all because they're not usually available in your country but you can access content available worldwide with no geo restrictions when you use expressvpn you see expressvpn lets you control where you want sites to think you're located you can choose from nearly 100 different countries giving you access to content that isn't available in your region if you like watching shows or movies expressvpn is a must-have for less than seven dollars a month expressvpn lets you access thousands of new shows and movies on netflix amazon prime disney plus and tons of other streaming services it's a no-brainer um couldn't be easier to use just fire up vpn app on your computer or tv select the location and hit connect expressvpn is also incredibly fast and doesn't slow down your connection you know i've i've used it plenty while traveling and at home uh you know it's always good to have a vpn and i personally i love expressvpn it's the easiest one i've ever used yes it is and so you can get the most out of your streaming services today at expressvpn.com tmg if you use our link you'll get an extra three months of expressvpn for free free again again for free free again that's expressvpn.comtmg expressvpn.com to learn more also i think what's happened now too is there was this period where productions were halted and then some people started producing again and then i was able to pull stuff off because like that second sketch pack i did i think it was four people like working the set it was the 80 in the front checking temperatures it was nema and it was really bizarre because nemo would go it took forever to do anything nemo would just set the camera then he'd like leave and then the gaffer would come in and then they would just like talk like scream to each other through a window and then you know we get we capture individual shots or whatever so i think like i think once media slowed down all these producers were like bro this cannot we have to figure out a way around this because there's gonna be so many people who just aren't working and it's gonna cave in industry so i feel that once they figured out those rapid tests now uh set people get tested so [ __ ] much like they're sick of it it's kind of dope actually it's kind of cool but dude like if you're working on sets every single day and you're just getting tested constantly you never have to worry oh no no these guys never worry um but i will say this dude after after getting so many tests myself recently i started to think just weirdly about germs which is you know there are people who are conscious of germs all the time but i was thinking about specifically a venue how i think i feel like i've said this before but the fact that venues just have only like four toilets and thousands of people's [ __ ] in that same toilet it's a [ __ ] miracle that no one has died from like a unique diarrhea or something dude the amount of public do you wanna [ __ ] bars i've taken a [ __ ] in oh bro bro it's just like imagine the amount of nightclubs i've taken a [ __ ] in which is a handful probably like two or three but still the fact that i didn't die of like dysentery what whole chlamydia you think your whole [ __ ] ins your whole whole your hole is exposed your whole hole is exposed the whole inside of your body is opened up to this world of germs that has been that has been exposed to public [ __ ] for years i mean we're talking maybe decades you know bro the fact that i mean if there was a quick way to get a sickness it would be to go into an environment like that and just spread your cheeks and just like invite whatever is in the air to just come on inside just pull up if you could do one of those like you know fart on command moves where you inhale through your ass a little bit you know some people can like breathe through their ass i don't know anyone that can breathe through their ass you know some you've never seen someone do it like like fart on purpose you have to like in take air to to do that dude people can know someone who can do that they should be on only fans because i've never seen that in my life and that's one i would pay for how do you know all these unique ass people cake sitters command farters dude i like you know i've heard of a command squirter you know squirtle that's just peeing isn't it no it's not p it's [ __ ] isn't that just taking a pee no dude it's uni it's unicorn juice it's unicorn fluid man it's not it's not pee fart on command that's wild yeah the only what if a dude's version of of you know squirting after like a prostate orgasm was was just [ __ ] you know a prostate orgasm i'm so scared to give our prostate check and that shit's gonna happen to me oh can we talk about that actually that dude who [ __ ] what did he do you shot the doctor he shot there was a guy in florida who was getting a prosthetic exam and he came and the guy was the guy turned around and shot the doctor he had a gun on him in the doctor's office no way i mean in florida no way you can do that can't you you can't just open carry into a [ __ ] doctor's office well who says open carry i mean he didn't turn around in the building and shoot him did he maybe maybe he oh maybe it was after the fact yeah he would have de bruh that's pretty wild if a dude has a [ __ ] sidearm on his hip and you gotta check his prostate i'd be like give me that [ __ ] i mean it's also [ __ ] wild to be so mad about that that that you drive to the dude's house afterwards because i actually think that's what happened now that you said that i remember that's reading that in the article that is so dark like that's you don't even get a little like post-nut clarity where you're like really pissed off and then you're like you know what actually everything's cool i'm i'm gonna take a nap instead he was upset cause he made him fall in love yeah yeah exactly i've never felt that way in my life no one can know jesus no no one has ever made me do that i'm [ __ ] i know john mulaney has done a whole bit about that but i'm terrified of that bro getting a [ __ ] hitting a prostate exam and your heart is nails i i don't i wouldn't give a [ __ ] dude you wouldn't care imagine how much the doctor sees that yeah it's probably mad regular he's like all right it's probably the most normal thing in the world dude just like oh i'm gonna have my intern here hold a bucket underneath you're you're you're like what wait why why the bucket you're just gonna get a little hard here huh oh and three two one and we're out it'll go away in just a second he's like ugh oh man man splash zone you know dude they turn you into a corner and there's just a crusty ass piece of carpet on the ground and you're like what's that for yeah he's looking forward oh why is there a target on the wall just try to get the highest points just fixate on it if you can aim for the high score the highest number of points see if you can do better than the last guy no huh still dripping down the [ __ ] jesus christ dude that's like that hole you saw that um uh that masturbation machine in china that i [ __ ] retweeted oh bro you're like huh bro you thought of you thought a fleshlight was dope hold on hold on what about this [ __ ] you hear about the vietnamese police that seized over 300 000 used condoms that were washed and packaged to be resold no yep no washed how are they washing that [ __ ] who's collecting them though where are they getting them from who they don't think about that part i want to know how they're washing them i'm more curious about the process there needs to be a how it's made on that whole process that's just it's just kitchen sink dude oh it's just one person with gloves on like just standard cleaning gloves the yellow ones and then they hang dry them he's watching it like a [ __ ] like a like a bar pint glass he's just that's what it is actually it's one of those geysers that rockets up that they used to clean glasses at a bar when they press it and then it just rockets with water they just do dude it's got to be some like industrial process where there's like a big bucket of them like in a in like sitting in a solution and then there's just like a minimum wage worker with [ __ ] dishwasher gloves just like putting them on like a like a series of pegs it's like they do it dumb fast the condoms are placed in border for washing 24 at a time they are how it's made man yeah wow what a show call back dude that is a crazy i'm feeling weirdly nostalgic right now the condom i used to watch it at the base and filled with hydrogen peroxide only to be re-lubricated later [ __ ] there's like a testing period where the condoms are on the pegs and they just have like a [ __ ] like a lego block of fleshlights and they just go my god it's a row of fleshlights that are pointed down yep and then the condoms are pointed up and the belts are going the opposite direction real quick testing all of them like multiple times like it goes down it turns then it comes back up and then it moves to the next one goes down turns comes back up and then there's a [ __ ] way they're shooting lube through the top of the flashlight so that it that's how it gets down and that's how they get it all looped up and then there's like there's like a period where it has to be artisanal so they can legally legally market them as handmade it's just like an old lady with like with like some weird like you know like [ __ ] middle like eastern europe clay looking [ __ ] and she's like this is something imported lube that is manually and then she just manually places it over the condoms and then it goes into some kind of oven where it's melted down and then they're or it's difficult or it's the folding technique oh yeah the one that they're maybe she just goes maybe they have like a certain sort of like two-handed technique where it's like boom and it's perfectly rolled and how do you do that even each condom is carefully packaged by one individual this ensures that the condom is not tampered with by machinery each condom goes through a stress test and they're just filled up like water balloons good meticulously testing them all even though they're all used [Laughter] refurbished condoms refurbished [Laughter] a refurbished condom in no universe i just texted you the [ __ ] now this video of the of the uh uh sperm extractor it's for sperm donors it's coming oh no oh yeah the way that [ __ ] pumps dude i love dope i love that it looks like one of those scales that used to be in a mall where you put like 50 cents in to get like your true weight we got to send this to we got to send this to all right say it again i said i love that it's in a um uh like the the device itself you know it looks like a parking like a parking meter or like yeah i was saying that old school [ __ ] at the mall where like you could put two quarters in and get your your true weight you remember that [ __ ] yeah yep which was just such a weird thing to do like you take a [ __ ] and then you walk out and that thing is just there and you're like what this is in the bathroom yeah why yeah i remember i did it once just to make sure that i was just a weight yeah just a weight yeah just a certain way just to make sure i had mass i was more people don't have scales you know at their place that's true i feel like most people probably don't own scales is that fair we didn't own one for forever and then yeah finally we were like we should probably care about this we should probably just have one just so it seems like we care yeah yeah so you know what i'm thinking looking at this like why don't they have these everywhere i know like it's just if you could just walk into this and it's like you know i mean same thing like fourth street promenade you're tired from chopping your back hurts a little bit just go to the [ __ ] machine just go to the gum machine just bust a fatty and then i feel like it'd be a little bit rejuvenated maybe not immediately maybe there's like a nap booth connected to it dude so i i remember honestly like four years ago uh my buddy had linked some article about these things and we were just dying laughing at the idea of an american one but it's like super crude like it's just like it's a vacuum company that failed and then just repurposed it as like this like sperm extractor yeah and we just were crying at the idea of like an infomercial of a die of a dude just working and then he's got this [ __ ] just like industrial tube in his pants do it as you were like while you walk the dog it's yeah it's like a shop vac it's like one of those [ __ ] big heavy duty ones big ass dyson canister in it full of [ __ ] yeah no it's shooting out the back one of those [ __ ] like one of those vacuums you use when you're like when you're like trying to get water out of a room shooting it out the [ __ ] back bottle it and sell it to porn productions extract yourself yeah dude that's that's the thing is crazy would you man that's a disgusting thought that thing just being in a [ __ ] bar somewhere this the coomb machine just in a yeah just an amsterdam bar pay three dollars that's exactly where i pictured it hamstring imagine the peeping booth oh you didn't go in there but you know the peeping booth where you pay like five cents and then you get in the little booth and then it like unfogs the glass and you can see the two people having sex like that'd be a perfect place just to add one of these bro into the wall when matt said that he went into one and there was jizz on the floor i legitimately like gagged mentally and i was like i cannot go in there stepping in someone else's [ __ ] dude i mean imagine sitting in a club bathroom the exact same thing is it though yes dude the amount of amount of jizz probably in a in a bar or a club bathroom is but but probably astronomically higher than you think it is not dude but like [ __ ] is not like someone like rubbing their cheeks and then they go oh and then a [ __ ] [ __ ] comes out you know what i mean like that dude was in there like i just yeah i'm talking i'm talking about people like either jerking off or having sex in bathrooms it probably happens more than you think yeah yeah yeah yeah i bet you we would be floored at the type of [ __ ] that goes down in bathrooms that's fair but and i'm not talking i'm not not talking about crapping or pooping or farting or even peeing i'm talking about everything else that happens that being in someone else's semen is foul yeah that is pretty gross can you imagine this new pair of shoes what the um really oh man who [ __ ] here i stepped in [ __ ] ah gross i hate stepping in calm oh boy just a little bit of comb on the shoe just gonna have to that's what it's like for the people those places do those places even get cleaned which the the uh the peeping booths and something yeah probably not probably not i mean probably actually probably for that exact same reason no i they have regulations about that [ __ ] in amsterdam so i feel like they have to be clean right the fact that you went there went into that [ __ ] so close to covid was so bold i mean that's probably how i got it when you slipped and when you slipped in it when i wiped it off my shoe with my hand sorry sorry let's let's change the subject stop talking about calm do you really wanna do you quickly wanna to talk about the rock situation that you sent and then we'll we'll end it oh my god dude it's so funny this dude couldn't go ahead go ahead oh my god i mean i don't even know what it is i just read the post the post is really confusing maybe we should just read it for the people and see if they can decide for this yeah no i hit it if you got it i think it's a little hit it if you know you lit okay so it's a video it's a video of his driveway and his giant titanium gates you know used to protect the house are lying on the grass and there's two people like two people struggling to move these things right and this is the post well here's the destruction i left behind after pulling my gates off myself and going to work this footage was taken from my security after i had already left and he arrived on the scene the second video is of our technicians and welders carrying one of the gates and placing it gently on the grass as you guys know from my last post there was a power outage at my house causing my gates to not open sure as hell wasn't my best hour but there were a lot of people waiting for me at work so i did what i had to do hopped in my pickup and went to work maybe next time i'll just hop the gates and call an uber actually no i won't there's no fun in that so this dude was so antsy to get to work probably because his schedule is so [ __ ] crazy yeah that he pulled off his own safety gates with his bare hands that is there's no way you're not on steroids i mean how is that even possible like how is that actually humanly possible i don't think it is that's the most millionaire [ __ ] like i'm just gonna destroy my own property because i have money to make i need to tear down these doors to keep this machine running how much is your time worth man you've got to think about it how much is his time worth if you broke it down ready probably makes what let's see he probably makes right now he probably makes like 30 million a year i mean that's a that's a wild guess but i didn't do like 50 mil in hollywood like recently how much does the rock make okay [ __ ] okay okay 2018 he made 128 million dollars oh my god so let's conservatively say this dude makes so let's 50 million a year concern that means that means he makes 350 000 a day right so divide that by 12 hours if we're thinking about how much each of your waking hours is worth thirty thousand dollars so he's standing there thinking of looking at the gate thinking if i don't get to this meeting and do what i have to do to make thirty thousand dollars in the next hour then i'm gonna lose 30k if i break this gate it's probably what the labor the labor cost of putting that back together is probably like uh like a thousand bucks cool i'm smashing this gate bro hulk smash baby i'm ripping this [ __ ] down damn that's crazy man this must be so cool to be the rock i mean you said it's the most millionaire [ __ ] ever but i think it's the most rock [ __ ] ever yeah true yeah yeah only the [ __ ] rock would do that yeah no you're right you're right you just can't stop being in an action movie yeah that's what i'm saying he's such a character of himself like dude he's probably standing there thinking what would the rock do right now oh wait i'm the [ __ ] rock i'm gonna pull these gates off um sorry wait wait wait wait okay sorry what what happened no no i'm just uh just something no bro he like we don't even have to go on too long that dude's life is so ridiculous just all day every day tons of money big action big things you know what i mean like he's just he's got to be one of the one of the busiest dudes on the planet no he is i mean that was the whole premise of that [ __ ] commercial he did but yeah he's definitely like a caricature of himself it's crazy 199 million followers on instagram on instagram that's [ __ ] awesome dude that that guy's famous as [ __ ] huge dude god damn how does he get his face that skinny that's what i want to know what this [ __ ] jawline is built like what's your face what's your face routine dude honestly this jawline's built like a [ __ ] grasshopper show me some good face workouts like a [ __ ] praying mantis dude need that man i need that he like reverse aged his [ __ ] jawline like you think he like instead of instead of doing those like crunchers or whatever he does like full exercise he does like you know like the pulleys that you use to like work on your triceps or whatever yeah like reverse lat pulls right he's doing that he's doing that with his teeth probably dude his [ __ ] is ripped everywhere i need steroids for jawline that's all i need yeah i know me too something to trim my face up a little bit i would i'd be grateful for that you know what it is it's probably not eating bagels every day that's probably what yeah it's probably like a good start guys go listen to our new song sofia yeah go check it out please go add it to all your playlists and and tell us if you like it and just stream it as much as you can and then i don't know and you know actually keep your computers on all night and and yeah yeah yeah yeah put it in a playlist with one song and just stream it all night and let's hack this [ __ ] hack that [ __ ] to the top man hack it to the top billboard here we come baby yep no you know what you can do is post a [ __ ] tick tock with it that's what you could do that's what you could that's what you could do for us i'm not above i'm not above that just go just i'll ask you right now post a tech talk if you're so inclined and you have millions of followers okay um and you know tmgpod.com if you want to get some merch and we appreciate you guys we'll see you in the bonus hell yeah peace

Channel: Tiny Meat Gang

Views: 223,330

Rating: 4.9493594 out of 5

Keywords:

Id: Yo_QKT6Uam8

Length: 71min 43sec (4303 seconds)

Published: Thu Oct 01 2020