Episode 102 - you. are. not. a. stoner.

what's up guys welcome to TMZ podcasts this is actually last week's episode if you want today's episode that'll be on our patreon right now you can get it a week early if you contribute its patron calm slash tiny meet gang so thanks if you do that and if not enjoyed this one who's what's up [ __ ] Jesus oh yeah yeah I was gonna say what you just do right there how the [ __ ] somebody clipped that Xbox record Xbox record that what's up [ __ ] welcome back you're not free to talk to me like that you're definitely calling me a [ __ ] just kidding welcome dude finally you're rapped out oh yeah yeah yeah how's it feel it feels good bittersweet it feels good bittersweet you've been doing it so long it's like it's like you don't know what to do it yourself now like do you have free time yeah I mean we don't really have free time yeah that's true yeah you have free time to work more dude yeah exactly free time too - yeah yeah yeah see I don't know if he doesn't know what to say you forgot the knows for myself anymore yeah and he he does real rose for a few weeks he can't podcast anymore yes what's happened to him welcome back - thanks so we rapped out real bro season three is wrapped and so it's coming out you know I probably can't say but in the in the winter so uh-huh you be all [ __ ] better watch it because it's a the seasons gonna be crazy and a lot of real fun zany [ __ ] happens yeah and so no it was a really good time really really fun honestly really fun a lot of mmm I'm not even I'm not even gonna say it yeah I'll leave it alone okay I'll leave it alone yeah keep it a mystery yeah but a lot of good [ __ ] is in there mm-hmm this year a lot of good [ __ ] some really good [ __ ] in there this year yeah yeah yeah oh man they got a crazy guest on that man I got a look right in st. Paul sheer again again yeah oh but there's someone just a little way below him then it's pretty interesting yeah okay cool keep an eye out for that - I didn't hear no one that say anyone that struck yeah that's crazy that's crazy I could have sworn anyways man um yeah if we have one of the funny things is we have to we have to reshoot the intro cuz no lost Nick lost so much weight yeah yeah it looks like completely different so I'm like I think I gained 4 10 15 pounds so this honestly makes sense for us to do this i rewatch season 2 yeah just going into it it's so weird rewatching a show cuz like parts of it I'm like I don't remember this at all then other parts my yeah I'm [ __ ] like yeah how could I forget this yeah yeah and I was looking at Nick I'm like Jesus dude he looks a little different now he looks different ya know way better now yeah yeah it looks great no but it's like it's night and day like yeah you could stand both Nick's next to each other and didn't think they were two different people oh yeah he looks like a whole person yet of his body yeah yeah and a little bit went to me yeah you think he and then and then get her got like like all-new with like 500 new tattoos on his neck yeah since the last season yeah so now it's like we got to reshoot it I was thinking I should get just tatted the [ __ ] up yeah just for fun just [ __ ] it what would you get I don't know I just leave my entire body sleeve your entire body yet just wear a body sleeve your body sleeve one continuous tattoo from the neck down all the way to my ankles one whole thing yeah I'm thinking of like getting those tattoos where it's just black yeah you know you're just a cover-up inked yeah the whole thing is solid cover up all your ex-girlfriends and stuff what do you mean mom that's out of respect for my mom she's a saint okay sorry sorry I'm getting another one on my arm soon yeah and like a week or two what I think I'm gonna get another skull really it's going crossbones yes damn it it's like the only thing I want when I loose II look at tattoos I'm like this is you are a walking stick or face I know god dammit you know what I might my theory for getting tattoos is if you can walk in and find it on eclairs yeah stick rack yeah then there's something that I would get yeah no I'm not saying it's a good tattoo I'm saying it's something that I would get [ __ ] it's kind of funny like you're like it's like number three choice they can like you open up the book it's like page one they got the peace sign and you're like I would get a [ __ ] peace yeah probably I would do to the counters like come on man you're like I don't come on that's pretty and he's like come on this let me draw you something right now let me draw you some brand new and you're like yeah I know why mess with the class yeah don't if it ain't broken don't fix it I'm definitely getting dice at one point I am pretty sure no seriously I'm gonna hit dice that's like my favorite one that I haven't gone you should get one on each nutsack okay yeah Burt why you know just one there when the lady goes down and tell her to roll the dice all the dice yeah you pop it Chuck right there put those in your ear should make some I'm good yeah you're like ow ow ow ow I'm gonna get a stress ball tatted on my oh my ball yeah nice when we get both of the clown tattooed on my dick yeah like the one that you punch and it like comes back oh yeah all the way up to that yeah yeah yeah and then get a little wig on the top yeah I can yeah he's got a Twitter video that dude pissing lighter fluid no well watch that later yeah sure why not have later what is it actually I don't know that might have to be bonus episode content cuz it's straight-up a dude like like he's got a flame in front of his penis and it's like like flames like it's crazy it's enticing fire it looks like yeah it looks like he's pissing fire yeah that's [ __ ] sick hard as though as hard as hell it's the worst case of gonorrhea ever recorded and Sunday literally pissing flames man bro I don't know man I was on a good sleep schedule when I [ __ ] it up because I started succession and and yeah and that's pretty goddamn fire pretty goddamn for why did I tell you insane dude for at first is it like the office style zooming it was like sort of comedic there's some weird i'll dude rhesus calling us he did the the score for Suki that's the boy right there what's a brief anyway yeah brief what the [ __ ] was uh yeah I think it's the second episode misdirected super weird like totally unlike any of the other ones um what what part of it like when they're in a car there's a there's a part like near the start of the episode where they're in the limo uh-huh and it's a lot of really weird like fast office style zooms I'm like this totally does not fit yeah and I think they changed it after it doesn't really happen I mean they did later in the season does it they definitely hit the zooms okay yeah I mean I know how I like the way I like the texture of the film mm-hmm or the film the this show feels good yeah like yeah each character is just [ __ ] [ __ ] yeah so the I hate how spot-on Kendall is as like a [ __ ] like like sackless like academic yeah he is like that guy how far are you through the season like at the third episode okay yeah and like all his like I mean he's like kind of starting to get a pair of nuts but like all his insults are like thus far like really lame and like you just cringe you're like ah you [ __ ] [ __ ] yeah he didn't want to strangle just away man his [ __ ] R is crazy it's like development through the season it's like he's got the craziest story for sure I mean I can only imagine given that and his first day as a CEO he told that Bank the the head of that Bank [ __ ] off like he just thought that was a good move yeah he was like [ __ ] off man yeah just like test he's like dipping his toes into the into the [ __ ] pool you know let's see what it's like to be a little [ __ ] and then just totally backfires oh that's great I loved what he talked [ __ ] the people and like he always says like that moment of doubt afterwards yeah like [ __ ] you the that guy I'm gonna lock you in a little cage stuff you full of money I'm gonna I'm gonna [ __ ] treats that guy like [ __ ] though I'm sure eventually he does know I'm saying like in that episode I was I was gonna like BAM ya know he and now Anna goes oh yeah when he calls him like in the middle of the night just like lays into him that that was really good I was that guy's supposed to be I think it supposed to be BuzzFeed that company oh sorry okay tell me the Asian guy really yeah I think that company's supposed to be volt herb supposed to be BuzzFeed got it and you'll see some funny [ __ ] happens happens with them but I think that's that's supposed to be they can look at very soon you got it got it anyways good show watch the show it's [ __ ] awesome yeah I'm pretty pretty solid yeah real into it what else has been going on put political stuff what else we got a trump impeachment yeah I mean I'm not even like okay so there was I'm gonna [ __ ] this all up so I'm gonna tread very lightly on this cuz I'm not super educated on this that I've qualified everything I think that we should [ __ ] in Pete now so apparently there was a transcript or there is a transcript to be leaked whatever there there is some confirmation about Trump discussing things that are conflict of interest I guess as a president with the president of Ukraine or something that's the most I'm gonna say I think yeah we're just so listen I mean [ __ ] get into it there it just so the bottom line is that there there the house no Republicans voted so it was like a landslide Democratic vote that they're going to I guess entertain the inquiry of an impeachment mm-hmm but that's you know that said impeachment I think people get twisted with like if you're impeached you're removed and it's like no you can get impeached but then the Senate has to remove you and the Senate is predominantly Republican so he's not gonna get removed same thing happen with a bill mm-hmm everyone ought like I feel like people will throw around that bill got impeached meaning like he got removed he got impeached but so I understand he was never removed so he still completed his term and he was still a president mm-hmm so I guess in in my mind it's like yeah and and and from what I've read like sort of democratic people or voters or like yeah well I I guess it's like a consolation prize like if you were to be impeached for them it's like whoo yeah it's probably likely not like he's still gonna finish out his term so see this is I get all my you know I got all my political info from Twitter yeah which is the best place to get that sort of news for example yesterday the the you know the trending hashtags were one of them was Trump impeachment party yeah and then the other one that was trending was Trump 2020 Lance landslide victory yeah I was like cool yeah there's no one in the middle that's just like well let's see how this plays out let's see you know I see the Ukraine call maybe maybe it could be bad but maybe they're right you know it's just like it's either like [ __ ] Trump get him out kill him yeah or or he's the man yeah or it's [ __ ] he's gonna win by a landslide you yeah yeah stupid yeah you know live live live Tarts yeah get on dude yeah yeah there's a lot yeah a lot of political stuff Justin Trudeau we're gonna get into that [Laughter] that [ __ ] followed dude when we followed that the barstool Telegraph you did that that was the day that we made the team Ji Won this is like all the barstool one uh-huh so it's like all the telegram has like these channel telegrams like the messaging app right yeah there's all these channels that you can like follow now to essentially just like a private Twitter channel yeah where you can't see like replies and likes but you can see how many people viewed something mm-hmm so now barstool is putting all the videos that they can't put on Instagram in there and it's just all of their [ __ ] on steroids it's [ __ ] nuts dude every day they drop like five six videos and every single one I watch and go oh that's the sound I make and it's it's tough but that the only thing I saw is beer being poured down three girls ass cracks stacked on top of each other drinking it at the bottom and always like it's something about pinkeye yeah all the time yeah yeah in no universe in no universe let's see hold on you better you bet I'm gonna tree problem let me just pull one up right now and just I can't even I can't even [ __ ] with it it's good what the [ __ ] is this dude let's go crushes a beer can with her [ __ ] boob yeah gigantic boob you got to have an iron tit to do that yeah do you think she does better on a dare I say it she got she got a robot tits you got cane crushers a nice there I said yeah just speaking of robots the Boston Dynamics a little dog robot that [ __ ] is out and about on its own what do you mean in the public I didn't read the didn't read the article completely but hold on can I can I show you this one first oh okay what in the [ __ ] is this oh do you ma'am look at this one this is all [ __ ] we can't show did you see this one no what the [ __ ] is this dude I was like I wonder if his arms are okay I'm like a murderous whole [ __ ] it's alright what the [ __ ] came out of the potato gun no it was like a giant firework put it in the wrong way I think so exploded like down dude alright so that guy is [ __ ] he's in like um you know fellas when you ladies when you get in the gym and you get like but you're doing like cable pulls and like you get on your knees and like you got like the [ __ ] like the split rope above your head and you pull it down to the floor like that's the position he's in like fetal holding this tube in front of him and it launches something out of it down yeah well it goes up and then you know I think the smoke goes up right like it's a firework but I think you put it in the wrong way oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah whatever I think I I who knows or something I don't know it just goes in the air and then that guy goes out and then this [ __ ] just launches straight down onto this guy's [ __ ] head he just goes and that's it it's just cuts it cuts before the flash even I really goes up I hate that yeah what about those videos when it just cuts and you're like oh I mean I think they do what on purpose do you think so yeah it's like it feels weird as a as a viewer I mean I guess if he cuz you're like maybe somebody's really serious happened that's why they cut it off yeah well then why am i laughing at this [ __ ] dying the other one was was a girl on a on a rope that you know like what do they call it when you go to the river and you like grab on those ropes and you jump off you kind of yeah it's the renamed rope swing yeah wrote I guess yeah rope swing I don't know what the [ __ ] that was just saying on concrete well is that even attached okay you don't know at those videos I'm like what how do you even get in this position yeah that looked like I hit like that looked like she was standing on Stonehenge and like just like a hill in Scotland and just [ __ ] ate [ __ ] like what was the goal for her to say I don't know there's no water back on the [ __ ] take off point there was no water on the other side I don't know what the [ __ ] she was going that was crazy like slips off and just oh my [ __ ] ground oh my god dude is it's spam calls all day long dude you should answer one dude yeah we should make that a segment of the podcast answering the spam calls that one I've actually so that call I've by that number I've been receiving since since 2008 uh-huh when I first got this phone number yeah and it it's basically a like school like a high school or like a middle school or something that has my number for some reason okay and calls me to tell me that their kids are like not in school or some [ __ ] like that and I below and I've just gotten that call forever I was like his ditching and nothing's happening nothing's happening he's just getting away scot-free as 2008 that's sick yeah good for him yeah that's why I've never like and I told them about it was this kid play hooky he's been in high school since 2008 yeah yeah probably cuz he keeps skipping class I mean I got some juicy little morsels yeah juicy little morsels yeah we got some good we got some good [ __ ] today yeah we got a man I do want to watch that tick tock at some point that I sent oh yeah yeah dude I got a okay I mean it's pretty usual you know I'm not that I'm on reddit but I've read a relationship advice headline that we don't have to get in the whole thing I just need to read the title of the post cuz I just my [ __ ] eyes widened so hard my 38 year old email dad 59 year old male dates younger women and he even had a serious relationship with my best friend female 34 but this time he's crossed the line he's seeing my step sister who is 39 what do what first of all I don't care how old and how eligible consent you're not dating my best friend as my parent you're not [ __ ] my best friend I was about to say this dad might does that must got like some swag or something do you think he's a sexy ass dad I don't know I mean because these girls know that this is wrong too right I mean know that stepsister is also dating her stepsisters dad that's true isn't that [ __ ] weird for her too yeah isn't it weird to date your best friend's dad yeah it's pretty [ __ ] weird I guess it's like well maybe he's just like a you know like a brad pitt looking dude just the hottest [ __ ] day I don't know it's just that's my dad yeah but no it's it's messed up of the dad yeah to do that [ __ ] yeah I'm sure he feels really bad but I was just saying how is he pulling that off oh this is horrible this is so bad stop making that sound dude Oh Oh [Laughter] Marshall uh yeah uh the first uh yeah that's that's what it's more of like a [Laughter] disappointed but like a little bit funny me the bar still uh yeah oh wait wait wait wait [ __ ] all this what I do how do I forget this the [ __ ] reviews you guys left on the podcast oh yeah yeah caracal I the last episode was hysterical last episode I you know I I inquired for our listeners to leave us a couple reviews on iTunes you know pump that number up a little bit yeah cuz there's something like we have like 17,000 now or something like that let's see well I don't know we have 17,000 reviews what's up what no I thought there's gonna be a longer pause being the dad again no no seventeen thousand seven a little clearer you and and so here I'm gonna dice my daughter's best friend with queef all the time gonna stop dude no room for her oh wait I got it did you see my relationship advice one that I sent oh yeah but I'm forgetting it I want to read that one after to let me sit let me read some of these reviews first okay these two in succession each other I was trying to scroll down the page like they're all like that now I was hysterical in all right this one's from Emily Rose two three two three she says the title is best for computer science majors and the review says I love it when they talked about the importance of 7400 quad NAND gate chips and how they're superior to other types of chips and computer architecture I've learned so much about computer architecture from them my professor lets me teach the class now must listen the next one is love how knowledgeable they are on dot dot dot the reason these guys can funny occasionally but really it's just so informative I've learned so much about how to pour some hints and they've really helped me turn my life around the next one says 10 out of 10 and then the review says 11 out of 10 pour cement just cement and computer science so [ __ ] opposite you think someone there's like random is they all I'm one with this podcast is well let me check that the reviews he's just super people are saying instruction worker playing this on the way home yeah with this [ __ ] six pack and just like so they were gonna talk about concrete or if I've been have I been duped here's one I love when they rate and compare all the vacuum choices out there it's refreshing to hear do people as you are as passionate and informed by the types and construct such fine machinery I don't like boobs I don't like boobs at the end that's good that's [ __ ] good alright here you know what I also want to play real quick yeah can you grab your computer No [Laughter] and I can't yeah yeah now that's not coming that's none of the force would do it but that's not doing it did you ever try that as a kid no that's outward you'd be doing that some further away yeah yeah pull it in yeah yeah yeah no it's not working as a kid though I try to move [ __ ] with your mind yeah yeah yeah didn't work I want to play the jingles no no that's but that's bone exclusive no it's not yeah that's bone exclusive no it's not no dude that's that's bollocks with Daddy why because there's real ads on this [ __ ] show that's bone exclusive alright fine I'm pissed and I know they're pissed right now hey man I'm just saying as he as the EP I'm making the call yeah that's fine that's fine making the call what um here so here let me read this one yeah this is a relationship advice one I got you hooked on this I'm proud man yeah I mean someone somebody actually deemed this to me and I thought it was really [ __ ] you hack my 29 female husband 31 male has become obsessed with taking over his dad's company since watching succession on HBO my husband and I were late to the party when it came to succession on HBO we finally binge to watched the entire first season and all the current season 2 episodes great show by the way I agree there Joe as a side note my fil father-in-law father-in-law owns a Halloween party type store and it's not even his main hustle but he's always been really into Halloween sick sick my husband has become increasingly obsessed with unseating his father from the Halloween store and I think it has something to do Succession that is so funny he told me after we watched season 1 that he was troubled that his father hasn't named a successor successor for the Halloween store I thought he was joking [ __ ] a few days later he posed this question directly to his dad who said nonchalantly let his sister 27 would most likely take over because she lives nearby and doesn't already work full-time but he obviously thought the question was odd because he's 56 and not close to being unfit to run a Halloween seasonal story then my husband started trying to find evidence that his dad was no longer fit to run the store he told me he had a meeting with the store shareholders but later I found out he had just accosted two teenage boys I checked dude what if his co-writer is pitching this [ __ ] show [ __ ] outta here this is so big dude it's why can't you just believe this [ __ ] it's funnier I don't know man I'm being a wet blanket I'm sorry it's definitely funny a coffee at the to teenage boy or a teenage boy who is checked into his store on Facebook and inform an informed them that the store clearly needed new management he also asked me if I could if I would consider consulting for the store part-time remotely as a way to unravel things from the inside oh my god dude I mean yeah it's definitely fake it's [ __ ] hilarious that's that's I can't wait till that show comes out in five years um what are they gonna call it what's gonna be the plot this gets weird as [ __ ] holy [ __ ] oh now he's drawn in go ahead then the sexual stuff got weird okay all right this is a Showtime show I'm not a stranger to kinks but he's now asking me to blow him and spit his love didn't do it okay all right we're just fine but again this is from succession all right imagine does every modeling your life around succession just is everything you handle Roy you want to be him yeah just wake up the next day just yeah honey I'm going to the work now don't [ __ ] with me tiny little bird baby I'll tie you up in stuff you full of cash I'll make you my tiny cash [ __ ] hey pig all right let me - hon have a good day [ __ ] off that's that's the most çetin thing on the show [ __ ] off [ __ ] off [ __ ] off [ __ ] off here's one here's a fun little so you're this app tick-tock no I've never been on it's like mmm it's like a it's like it's a place to post video so it's not like YouTube apparently but its own um you can only do a minute uh which I don't understand because you'd want to watch a full video right you know but if I wanted to post say you know um my traffic stops I need more than a minute and I like to post my traffic stops to Facebook okay you know cuz I read that you know the police they can't really be doing the things that they're doing hmm so I'm leaving evidence online so that you know I'm doing my part anyway um tick tock kids and people are busting open pregnancy tests uh-huh because there's a pill in there so so people bust it open and they're like oh it's Plan B it's inside the oh it's Plan B oh my god they put a plan B inside the pregnancy test that's so [ __ ] up whatever it's a [ __ ] like uh it's like an anti like moisture pill hold on let me goddamn it all right yeah yeah yeah it's included to absorb moisture so I get so like the did like the actual like chip in there doesn't like get you know okay maybe because people like maybe there's a tendency to leave like those types of things in like a bathroom or something like that yeah so the pill is in there to absorb moisture so that like yeah I get it but what so what's this okay outcome of this really taking the pill so that's what they're like the PSA is like do not [ __ ] take that pill because tons of kids are busting them all up in on tik-tok and being like there's a [ __ ] you know my god oh my god and you got adults doing it that's the saddest [ __ ] that I've seen it's like adults trying to get clicks and they're like yo what up take stalkers me and Bill here we're gonna crack open a pregnancy test yeah yeah if you're if you're an adult and your first reaction to that is isn't [ __ ] kids are so stupid yeah what are you doing and your first reaction instead is oh yo if that if this is working for them it's gonna work for me yeah yeah you gotta you gotta [ __ ] you know you got to buy a you gotta buy an in sand indoor motors or an indoor you have to buy a peloton bike and in cycle because that's some adult [ __ ] to do all right what do you buy an indoor bike and spin on it feel like a [ __ ] adult that was the most roundabout way of saying a cure age that's what you have to do if you're taking a a pill from the inside of a pregnancy test to generate [ __ ] views on your tik-tok channel you've got a body of a cow eat on butter and cycle it until you until you're sweating if I ever have kids that's someone to use in they act immature yeah God you are 19 years old how much you have within the bank right now I don't know 1,500 bucks go buy a peloton bike used I don't give a [ __ ] okay what I better see it in your room by Friday I wanna see you spinning on that thing take your favorite program I don't care Hills endurance flat ground I don't give a [ __ ] I'll see you on the [ __ ] bike you're gonna peddle that thing and act your [ __ ] age okay doesn't mean I'm grounded yes yes get on that [ __ ] bike sitting there Sport Chalet hi out can I take the display peloton oh nice looking to uh increase your you know just spice up the routine will you into working out not really why you boy find them cuz I'm grounded oh that's a healthy punishment what do you mean by that grounded like you can't like you had an injury you have to stay stationary what's going on what do you mean by grounded I just might sorry I looked at my phone and I lost it I lost it but you lost you I lost it I can't believe you just said that get a peloton bike that is so obscure dude well I mean like that's that's some [ __ ] that adults do you know you got it you [ __ ] bike on a peloton bike can you locate it by that endorse that you don't forget a peloton you know that's like that does a little bit you know out of budget for like everyone but like by like indoor cycle and go cycling you know go to a spin class yeah go to a [ __ ] spin class if you look if you're on tik-tok thinking about ways that you can you can [ __ ] generators older than 22 and you're older than 22 and it's like shock value based [ __ ] yeah go to a spin class spin it out spin it out yeah I want you to sweat out all your stupid immature ideas yeah speaking wait wait hold on but no way you hold on what okay let's wait what's real quick what do you imagine that poor girl a few weeks later who the bar still so I'm trying to get out of here tell me full come she's on that and there's stupid [ __ ] boyfriend's like you know there's a [ __ ] yeah she's like you think and he's like I mean [ __ ] let's do it and she [ __ ] pops it and it just [ __ ] like instantly just dries the [ __ ] out of her throat this is [ __ ] anti moisture because she takes it she's like oh he's like what just like he's like what babe that's the pill suck on the comment about it it has to kill although come has to reduce all the calm and the moisture so also doll dies [ __ ] him yesterday Laurent said like doing the green-screen [ __ ] so I'm just like sitting on a stool right and and I was like practicing my lines or something and there was some [ __ ] about some [ __ ] about like going fast or something and the makeup chick is like blotting my face yeah and I go well not to come out of your balls she just like looks at me and I'm like huh I'm sorry that's probably wrong time to say that do like yeah I just wanted to say real quick speaking you know of kids and Gen Z tik-tok and all that stuff here you go it's back-to-school time it is back-to-school time and when you go back to school you want a clean face alright and so I want to thank Proactiv empty for sponsoring this episode of the podcast we're gonna write into it oh my god right into it alright Proactiv has helped fight acne for almost 25 years and now with their next-generation acne treating system practice of empty you can go back to school feeling your best Proactiv MD includes a prescription-strength retinoid that goes deep into the pores to help prevent acne I use the chitin one in the shower every single day I do it's great face wash it makes you feel good yeah and it cleans my face and right now for our listeners we have a back-to-school offer from Proactiv you can't get anywhere else with your Proactiv MD order you will also receive for free practice on the go bag which features their t-zone oil absorber body acne wipes and green tea moisturizer close to a $100 value plus free shipping with a 60 day money back guarantee so don't wait and go to proactive comm slash gang to get this special offer again that's Proactiv broa CT IV comm slash gang to order and make your first day back at school your best day ever when did you do that what what is that it's the most wonderful time of the year Halloween when you're planning your costume as a kid and it was like the most fun that you could have pre-christmas pre-christmas oh my god I gave it to it I'm gonna say it later but no it pre-christmas is what I don't like freak um oh man speaking of pre-cum and now that you're an adult on your pillow down by halloween feels less Halloween ii am i right well me undies is bringing back to childlike joy of picking out the first costume with their spooky prints and Halloween costume onesies that's right costumes onesies boo onesies is the most fun you can have pre-christmas yeah yeah for sure it's a great courage for your pre Christmas we wear me undies I wore them right [ __ ] now we're the Valentine's Day a dish dish they stain with your free Christmas I got a bunch of pre Christmas in there I'll leave free Christmas in mind me undies all the time and you get 15% off your first pair to leave a little bit of your pre Christmas in it for free shipping and a harbor sentence Beijing guarantee go to me undies calms less dmg again it's 15% off your first pair go get a onesie go get a spooky little spooky little something for your bum and private spooky bombas go right yeah go get a spooky bum is spooky bum me undies cause last TMG guys we all know that nobody has time to go to the post office that's right lutely nah it's a real hassle he's an absolute hassle you gotta get in your car you gonna drive all the way the post office and you get walk-in and it's just it's just a hassle you know you don't know where they are you got a Google map it it's just a hassle that's why you need stamps calm one of the most popular time savings tool tools for small businesses ever time savings tools stamps calm eliminates trips to the post office and saves you money with discounts that you can't even get at the post office that's right we used it when we were sending out our posters and it was a lifesaver it really wasn't me it made everything so easy sittin on stamps calm with all of our problem all of our postage problems were solved BAM you can see you can use your computer to print official US postage 24/7 for any letter any package any class of mail anywhere you want to send it mm-hm and right now our listeners get a special offer that includes a four week trial plus free postage and a digital scale without any long-term commitment just go to stamps.com click on the microphone at the top of the homepage and type in TMG that's stamps.com click on the microphone enter TMG well guys Cody so nicely just rolled into the ad so we're back um I just want to experiment with that that's fine um it was more fun was it not more fun I was definitely more fun it was more fun listen like you know I'm I'm trying to make this I want to make that part entertaining yeah yeah yeah yeah no I feel you can't be entertaining know it can well I think I feel like everyone should know on the face shown right now we just heard of pre-cum as pre-christmas in an in that yeah and that is just he has baby want a little bit of my pre-christmas who is that pre-christmas oh wait here comes the eggnog oh my [ __ ] is full of pre-christmas right now bro grab that computer let's get multimedia on these [ __ ] come get that [ __ ] computer dude let's watch some porn porn together dude grab that [ __ ] let's get multimedia on these [ __ ] on these [ __ ] asses are we rolling on that one um I don't know you want me to check yeah intertwine intertwine you guys Desson [ __ ] just bring me the ninja fellas make some noise if you got if you right if you rolling around with pre-christmas right now fellas make some noise we got a little pre-christmas yeah I'm saying on your way to work ladies let us know ladies Carlene now let us know how you feel about pre-christmas stained on your underwear yeah plug it in turn on that mic yeah a little bit of pretty actually it'll find it's fine it'll it'll sink it yeah it's fine it's fine call now and tell us about your pre Christmas experience and what how you feel about pre-christmas hold on we got a caller calling in right now Jenny you're on the line how do you feel about pre Christmas um I [ __ ] hate pre-christmas I think it's disgusting I don't think we should do it anymore Wow strong opinions there let's cut over to Dylan in Indiana Dylan Indiana how do you feel about pre Christmas um I'm you know what I've heard that with pre-christmas also contains a lot of stockings semen sperm sperm sperm that's what gets girls pregnant right summer not semen what's the difference same thing is semen all right well let's let's just go ahead and ruin the search history here sperm versus semen spermatozoon that's um it's actually a new movie coming out chance Channing Tatum vs. Jonah Hill 25 Jump Street sperm versus semen you just [ __ ] sperm everywhere sperm versus semen sperm 15 crazy things you should know about sperm you think how crazy do you think these facts are I love this this is like we're just hanging out just using the computer like old times remember yeah like invite your boys over to use the computer yeah hell yeah yeah what come over this just Google [ __ ] yeah just be on the Internet legit you should just go on the internet with my boys yeah there's just like not even [ __ ] porn not online being online doin [ __ ] and just looking at this big it actually is kind of sick uh-huh that's [ __ ] you know your dad looks like Neil Lane so Armstrong I'm looking at a picture of him right now just my picture my dad no Lance Armstrong reminds me of your dad is a picture of Lance Armstrong right in front of me right now why are you looking at a picture of Lance Armstrong because I was looking at the 15 crazy things for sperm and I clicked over to see a fact and it said one testicle is enough it's showing Lance Armstrong such a [ __ ] great that's what they should put for like ball like ball cancer removal mm-hmm this is a picture of Lance on and one ball is enough one balls enough open up that [ __ ] tik-tok that I sent to the team's you talking points ladies and gentlemen this is how would you describe this guy me neither I don't really know yeah he's a he's a special one he's a special one this is our boy right here are we gonna get copyrighted for playing as whatever um we shouldn't I've got some people make compilations all the time yeah I know and they get [ __ ] claimed whatever play it let's do good night it's so funny like Michelle let's let's reset let's reset I gotta get off um all right guys you ready for this let's go this is just mm-hmm I've got some [ __ ] I gotta get off my ass then I don't use Twitter so you're dealing with it here if you did not start smoking weed out of a [ __ ] apple or a can or a water bottle or some [ __ ] you made in your shop class you're not a [ __ ] stoner your carts don't make you a STONER so get the [ __ ] off I snapchat with your stickers I don't get the sticker with your stickers I think he means like goodbye like the stickers on the [ __ ] screen like the yeah wait what are carts cartridges yeah yeah like vape yeah yeah babe questions man you're not a [ __ ] stoner goodbye goodbye hey look just drop the [ __ ] fattest bomb you [ __ ] idiot you're not a [ __ ] stoner goodbye the gabbai is the veteran goodbye you're not a [ __ ] stoner who is that [ __ ] heated about kids showing off vape pens snapchat your name Gucci man you pissed like what you feel that passionately about [ __ ] you being a stoner means that much to you I mean are we getting got right now is this a bit did you Pete the rest of this man's profile Oh see dude can't just take it at face value okay oh look I just found this [ __ ] hamster in the street outside and I mean now you seem kind of cute so I got him a cage and I throw him in my backyard but will someone tell me why my [ __ ] guinea pig is just out here looking like such a prick I keep feeding him watermelon and he's not eating it I mean like look here you yeah I mean you just wouldn't really understand because you're not a [ __ ] stoner so get off [ __ ] snap chat with your stickers guy later bye the worst part about that is that like went viral yeah like people were like I agree with this dude yeah dude speaking the truth man dude oh man you said it beautifully said we're all thinking bro it's like oh my god I mean yeah [ __ ] Jesus you ready for this I'm a goth boy says I mean yeah card smokers ain't really stoners but I started smoking out of a pipe yay for gatekeeping I guess l'm al the gatekeeping on stoning is being a STONER is so good they should remake Blade Runner 2049 but instead of like robots and like sub subhuman class citizens they should just be stoners and cart smokers shut the [ __ ] up cart smoker get back in line bro is that a term cart smoker only use term I don't know let's google it ya mean the boys smoking carts now card smoker 108 inches so it's like a literal type of smoker 84 inch card smoker huh doesn't seem like it's lying dude let me go you're not a [ __ ] stoner you're not a [ __ ] stoner listen bro if you never what some stupid-ass [ __ ] that you used to do to smoke weed but give her give her bacon you ever baked it on like a cracker with peanut butter you ever do that no so it's like the easiest no no it's like the easiest way to make [ __ ] edibles okay if you don't have like [ __ ] to make brownies or whatever you take the crook saltine yeah and you spread peanut butter peanut butter on it yeah then you just sprinkle weed on top and you bake them and like the oil from the peanut butter or some makes in the THC bakes inside I made those a couple times I remember if you've never done that you're not a [ __ ] stoner you're never [ __ ] oh dude yeah that that's what everyone should be talking about all the horrible stupid ways to get high yeah this fool is upset because people don't have to do dumbass [ __ ] to get high anymore yeah this is mad that's what it is yeah it's kind of like some boomer [ __ ] a little bit a little bit yeah millennial boomer got a millennial boomer [ __ ] that's a thing dude millennial boomer is there needs to be a term for that yeah boomer yeah if that's me talking about the pelt oh yeah yeah boom Eleni illumine millennial boomer are like are like Facebook people it's all they are like I feel like that's the best way to describe them yeah sort of like dick I know it's kind of tik-tok people now yeah they're bleeding oh I'm just saying like that that's what I feel like that's where they spawn from yeah is there like Facebook people yeah you know or like or like grown men tweeting [ __ ] and then like adding hashtags mm-hmm like you ever seen a grown man tweet something like three hashtags is there any on that is it like fyp for you page as other ones had that in it yeah it's like dude you're not a [ __ ] stoner goodbye goodbye okay listen if you never hashtag your post a bunch of [ __ ] times you've never been an instagramer you're not a [ __ ] tech talker goodbye bye [Music] this is millennial boomer [ __ ] to the fullest yeah I want to [ __ ] I how how many people I wonder probably know one or at probably a time someone just needs to get on there and just like duet with this fool and be like like just the most obscure way to smoke weed if you'd know like like he's like a 80 year old man it was like if you've never smoked shake weed that has literal twigs in it and you had to pull out the [ __ ] twigs and dust it with miracle-gro for like a week you are not a [ __ ] stoner good bye bye if you've never laced your weed with pre-christmas because your tongue was too dry from all the weed you were smoking you got cottonmouth so you can't actually roll a joint and you need your pre-christmas to seal the joint then you're not a [ __ ] stoner good bye bye if you've never smoked weed at literal Woodstock you're not a STONER goodbye smoking it evidence plenty of you like like bloggers and [ __ ] like like like Instagram girls like if you've never eaten a rustic Canyon one Wilshire Boulevard you are not a foodie goodbye goodbye if you've never driven a Honda Civic with the third gear pop out and you're fifth gear kind of shredding because you [ __ ] with the final drive in your boys garage and now you [ __ ] up the whole transmission and you have to wait six months to buy a whole new transmission you're not a [ __ ] ricer goodbye if you've never waited in line at a Sephora for that new drop you are not a beauty guru goodbye bye bye [Laughter] if you've never cut the springs on your Honda Civic to make it lower so you can look fly as [ __ ] in high school you're not a real honda head goodbye oh my god that's [ __ ] awesome if you've never eaten [ __ ] with your ass in the air you don't really eat [ __ ] goodbye you're a smear yeah like when you're both on the bed oh yeah yeah yeah you got a really yeah yeah yeah pop this you got a pop your cake yeah no I never I always make sure if if I start to even get into that position I'm like no not like a handstand sanity doing handstand in that [ __ ] yeah it's not very ergonomic dude yeah 69 talk about ergonomics dude walking you got a [ __ ] you got a [ __ ] about ergonomics while you're losing you're a virgin July comment 69 is the most ergonomic way to eat [ __ ] it's the most ergonomic that's such a great out of context play yeah 69 69 the monster bird on my way to you [ __ ] it is right now it is you know or it is or edge of the bed and you like you're on your knees like you're like you're reading the Bible yeah you know like prior like you you know you got your hands on the thigh yep you know one hand yeah you know I won't be graphic but I like to pick you know I'm standing right pick her up just put her on your shoulder looks like Coachella but backwards yeah yeah this is what they called it she's looking at you know the background watch I go yeah you're no not today just hold the nerve by the ass yep holding her by the ass and just bro I have to I have to bring this up so I'm with I'm with my my comedy og he brings me to a comedy club called the J spot single wooden or is it Neil I forget exactly whatever it doesn't matter at the Inglewood and you know it's a pretty it's a pretty good comedy spot and you know a lot of funny comics like a [ __ ] just I don't know it's a good night I'm like I'm crying laughing you know hella funny comics on stage and then out of nowhere the DJ's like whose birthday is it and they started playing some music and in the corner I had seen this dude like hope this [ __ ] in all denim and he had the sleeves cut off but I just thought that was like his swag I'm like he's just a just a buff a sleeveless dude and he gets on stage and I realized I wasn't wearing a shirt underneath the denim vest he's a male stripper okay this is not it's not uncommon I guess the J spot for male strippers to just like it's like it's like it's like a bit like I just bring out a male stripper dude okay um one other one other Comrie oh jeez he actually told me he had to do he had to do a spot at a strip club but he had to go on in the middle of the show they brought actual strippers out and then he had to go onstage after the strippers came out so he was like I knew it was gonna he was like the he's like I just knew the moment I got out there I was gonna get booed all these dude just had titties in their face and now I gotta be like socks tell jokes that rival be hey man you guys ever been to the DMV you can't tell a joke that's funnier than a ban then is cooler than a pair of tits look yeah yeah yeah yeah titties in your face no you weren't even a [ __ ] joke after that that's what I'm saying there's no joke that that is as funny as T's are cool those tools are just fired up with dopamine half would ya the dude comes and he's like I don't really like jam on my toast yeah yeah anyway so this dude comes out on stage and he it's this girl's birthday she a big girl you know easy two hundo okay easy okay that mafia picks her up does the reverse he does the backwards Coachella he first he picks her up he lays her on the stage and he's grinding her then he [ __ ] from a squat position reaches under her by her back and [ __ ] carries her up and puts her like hoists her over his shoulder it was like the smoothest [ __ ] and then he just starts like fake eating her [ __ ] while holding her in the air and she's just like like screaming and everyone there's like oh [ __ ] and then the this dude Eric Blake he's about to go onstage and he's like these [ __ ] really put this on stage before I'm about to go up he's like he's like I'm the headline comic I have to compete with this it was like all women in the audience oh my guess the same situation like he's gonna go out there yeah and this will just does that all know her like get tough bring him back out here yeah and he was like joking when I started doing push-ups and shitty bomb No Oh super funny okay no there's no way you could bomb but he's kind of like what the [ __ ] damn yeah but I was more acknowledging like when he did that [ __ ] that's like one of the few times in my life where I legitimately felt small is like I don't I didn't feel like a man anymore say it like I go down it mask you lated looking at that I was like like I could never even physically yes you did that so smooth yeah yeah that's a great it's a great that's a great position the reverse Coachella yeah so that's a funny James that's a funny you know funny I guess saying more about that in a room something that we have comment but James of you're listen that's a funny word the reverse Coachella and I just [ __ ] yeah she puts she has to put on sky go playing not today oh my god my god just to put on bracelets and everything for the actual yeah in the bedroom yeah yeah yeah for the reversal yeah that should be our next sketch the ergonomics of each person when eating vagina you want to be very careful of your c5 and see four discs in proper positioning could dislodge a disk and if you're a little bit older could put you in for some physical therapy when eating [ __ ] we're gonna give you the most optimal positions to eat [ __ ] from lesson 169 place your face so the tip of your nose is in her [ __ ] gently tuck your chin and extend your tongue as far as it alright alright no I mean this is this could be animated what's the other video you said of the kid in school one the kid in school he's sitting watching some like [ __ ] teacher oh oh oh yeah you know I'm talking about me let me let me play that joint I put it in the thread right what it also what is this like this tinder bio um oh yeah yeah oh yeah yeah cat dammit how do I forget all the things I want to talk about this someone someone DM this to me they're like I found this on Twitter or on tinder and this is like the most insane this [ __ ] profile is so crazy because most tinder profiles I've seen like they're quirky they it's like a joke it's something that's kind of like yeah it's got some degree of one-liner maybe it's like brutal honesty this one is honest okay I'm so [ __ ] horny for art hoes I don't know tomorrow is with that just got me I want to [ __ ] a coked-out tumblr hipster DIY aesthetic astrology thought in her lip gloss DSL mouth oh my god Oh bar still up for that I want to ravage a girl with thick frame glasses and edge died Bobcat bangs every time I hear a thick waste hygiene clad choker wearing Wiccan minks sage yikes y'all or big mood I think I'll [Laughter] wicked like Wiccan minx wicked minx dude hey baby let's just spark spark is a Wiccan minx has demonstrated by this Devils demons and witchcraft yeah I want to finger in art ho through her overalls while I pretended to be interested in her talking about Van Gogh and the Arctic Monkeys it's good dammit dude wicked minx says yikes y'all are y'all are big food big mood right there that's good that's a big mood now this Twitter video is like a [ __ ] is a teacher who like just doesn't know anything it's crazy this is so the students are like are like telling her this [ __ ] is wild Bridge it was pretty funny honestly yeah [Music] I see I see why now that people have Jaime's cuz this is like figuring all this [ __ ] out while we're talking is like pull it up yeah I'm cool that [ __ ] up please we're pulling it up dude we're pulling it up I nailed it yes we should we should have a we should have like a pull up infrastructure built right yeah pull that up yeah we wanna pull that up pull that up infrastructure we will hold on here we go ready she reaches up to whatever the [ __ ] the North Pole is Antarctica and she's like this wait no wait where is it looks down she's already told she's on the bottom cut the [ __ ] [ __ ] what's the god brutal man brutal being the teacher and have no net no idea I won't be substitute teacher yeah just for some [ __ ] I don't get yeah we were that would be pretty funny [ __ ] geometry algebra to whatever whatever like right now yeah I'ma be an algebra like algebra to substitute yeah just walk in there and like alright the [ __ ] curve you plot it you guys know how to find the slope of a line I don't know how [ __ ] know I'm high yeah alright if you don't know how to find the slope you're not a real algebra I'm not an algebra algebra you ready you ready if you've never done a problem with an abacus you are not a real math major goodbye and goodbye goodbye goodbye okay goodbye now goodbye goodbye goodbye you ever um what the [ __ ] else we got going on yo what's up babe Oh at the Disneyland yeah what Disneyland dude I was like not looking forward to it like I don't know like I it's been so long since I've been to Disneyland I was just like oh it's just some you know it's like I'm like I just I don't think I'm gonna have fun hmm and then I went there I had probably the most fun day I've had in four in as long as I can remember yeah swear to God I had so much fun I was having more fun than Kelsey she would like you know she'd be like taking off her goofy hat and my what are you doing we're not over you trying to do a Disney boyfriend I was awesome dude I was [ __ ] into it it was I was having so much fun I just could not Elena and I went a few years ago and we got there and we wrote like a few rides and we were like this [ __ ] is corny as oh you guys are wet blank and we did so much fun dip the phone [ __ ] you we pieced the [ __ ] out yeah what to do what [ __ ] I see I hate this I hate like I hate like pretending that I'm like better than Disney when I get there I'm like I'm like you know what I'm gonna [ __ ] just I'm just gonna like relax and try to enjoy it and it was [ __ ] fun dude Star Wars line is coolest [ __ ] it's not that I'm better than Disney it's that I just but it's not corny it's like it's [ __ ] dope I that's the thing dude I could not I just couldn't I couldn't get into it like I didn't I didn't feel like I was in like a the happiest place on earth I didn't feel like there's anything magic about it I just like was seeing it for what it was practically I'm like all right just like a goofy you like I don't know I just I couldn't but that's sad is it maybe it's sad I'm empty inside man I'm devoid of of empathy and feelings and maybe I'm depressed yeah that's not good that's what I'm saying it's not good to be depressed man no but I mean like I just you know I don't know I don't know I just I had fun I had a lot of fun in psalm try sir no I'm not the one like that I'm not judging you for having fun I just like me personally I couldn't maybe I'll go back and try again maybe I'll feel something this time yeah that was a dark place in my life at that point yeah exactly go back yeah maybe like just yeah I don't know there's a lot of um I was just fond man I was just fun like I understood a lot of [ __ ] effort into making sure that you have a good time there yeah there's so much goddamn [ __ ] you know what it is dude I um I'm to like uh I'm to Kin Kin d'alroy about the situation and I started doing the math of like time and line versus fun mm-hmm and because if I didn't you get the Fastpass forever oh we did but it was like we it was at a point we had to like go wait for them and you had to come back and just like a [ __ ] little walk that [ __ ] I apparently was was like kind of hell yeah now it's all in the app yeah yeah then the app is [ __ ] unbelievable by the way weird little side note yeah whoever whoever wrote that app yeah it's incredible yeah like I had like six hundred thousand five stars reviews and I was like how I was like how the [ __ ] yeah it's a Disneyland app oh yeah and then I started using I was like this is [ __ ] incredible yeah like I ever did everything I wanted it to and more that's great everything and more yeah that's it that's what I'm saying is I don't know now you made me feel like a [ __ ] for liking Disney no I'm not Jamie you know what else is a great app what is a man you know a real man you know I don't know about no Disney app but at the Home Depot if that happened smooth as butter actually no seriously that app is [ __ ] amazing oh you're being serious yeah because it it tells you where the [ __ ] the thing is like the aisle and bin yeah you don't have to talk to anyone that's sick that's [ __ ] sick it's a wish Target and Walmart had that [ __ ] obsolete not they want you to walk around that whole [ __ ] that's why you walk out that's why you always walk out a target if that's true the [ __ ] pool noodle yeah headache medicine and [ __ ] dog food you don't have a dog you know not yet now yeah but yeah welcome welcome back to the Millenial podcast where we talk about good apps apps yeah yeah there's all the best apps that you can download and you know recommended apps that we recommend personally it is and I would highly recommend the Disneyland a happy even if not even going [ __ ] download that Jack crews around you know you said something a second ago about Disneyland I'm [ __ ] I was gonna bring something up goddamnit sorry jog my memory you had a really fun time in Disneyland oh you know it's disgusting it isn't what this is what I was gonna say but the [ __ ] turkey leg is it gross it always looks really good and I whenever you look at it you're like that's just gonna be amazing you bite into it and you forget that it's like eating a literal bag of salt it's actually probably the same taste as that pill that's in the [ __ ] mmm-hmm in the pregnancy test it's like so much salt you're just like what the [ __ ] did I just eat is awful you know what I love you know what I love I didn't have one of those but I had like a [ __ ] ton of food it's like you know all different [ __ ] ice cream yeah [ __ ] popcorn yeah all we were eight at this we had been yeas at the New Orleans themed place whatever learn I love food I love walking those are two things you get to do a lot of at Disneyland and I think that's why I loved it so much you got the water it's kind of like a bun yeah I love walking they're a bonus yeah I feel like I should walk more hey speaking of walking what your boy is almost allowed to go back to the gym oh yeah yeah I'm almost there nice yeah you gonna do it of course yeah me too bro I marked my [ __ ] words once I'm ready I'm going to that [ __ ] Muay Thai Jim I'm gonna do all the [ __ ] that I want to do and I found out the dude is my physical therapist he's like he's been in like mountain biking like downhill biking for a minute uh-huh so I think I might finally crush a trail I like I want to get on a mountain bike yeah really yeah you're interested in mountain biking I've always wanted to get like some crazy downhill what yeah I'll just get stoned and watch like tons of sorry I'm not a STONER um I will smoke as a cart smoker yeah I'll consume a little bit of weed now if you've never waited in line for a fast pass and then gone back to the ride you're not a Disney ho I guess in Disneyland business yeah no I'll get okay hi Ellen just I'll watch like an hour at least of just downhill mountain biking what I [ __ ] that [ __ ] is so dope to me you know I used to do it yeah yeah like avid yet not avidly but like for for like PI three four years let's go I had a bike when I was a hardtail but I would like rent full suspension and do like full-on downhill and live in Montana and Shelley yeah yes [ __ ] go I used to love that [ __ ] I had the [ __ ] you know I would always love it I was like I was tiny as hell element an elementary school and I was like really in a BMX it was a saddest [ __ ] dude I was like so short that like I barely could ride like an adult bike frame mm-hmm like I remember like my dad took me to a bike shop and they were like yeah well we could put him on a 20 inch that's the smallest we can go and I remember like my feet just like barely touching the ground and like being able to ride it was like brutal and like I would like try to like Jay hop and stuff and like just the bike was not [ __ ] this was not big enough damn yeah I was really gonna be a Mexican I ate [ __ ] really hard off a ramp and it like it just like spooked me and I don't know like I left it alone after that I actually always have wondered like do I have like CTE from that [ __ ] oh yeah cuz I [ __ ] I nailed the concrete no helmet and like your head yeah my head was ringing and I was like paranoid oh my [ __ ] I have internal bleeding I'm gonna die you don't get it from one you don't get it from one what did you did you have a concussion I don't know like I just remembered beefing yeah and then waking up on the street like it felt like I don't know if I was out I don't know if it just like I like closed my eyes and open them like I don't know the time difference yeah but like in my memory I just remember waking up and a bunch of people standing around me so I could have been I don't know you get CTE though from like is it multiple oh yeah it's like the oceans over time it's like I would prefer that you don't get it from one I would prefer that yeah yeah it's not a type of thing where I want to say I have CTE it says some have genuinely been afraid of I've always looked back at that moment and been like did I [ __ ] myself really bad um but now you get CT from like yeah from multiple serious that's great I'll take that like my friend my friend growing up was like a pretty avid snowboarder and he he got into like he got like three or four like serious concussion Jegs and by the fourth the doctor was like you can never snowboard again because well this ever happens again your dunzo your dunzo like big moon brain-damaged pretty much and yeah yeah death and that's big yeah big mood big mood yeah yeah y'all are still snowboarding Ike's man you know you know you know if it's an art Howe not by her clothes but like how dead she looks in her eyes are the void of emotion so not ask you this is the the girl on euphoria the glass is one the one that in the in the beginning has that video sent out of her [ __ ] and then she becomes like a cam girl machine art Howe um I I didn't watch from the beginning so I don't know her pre cam girl okay I know her as the cam girl okay I mean she could qualify okay well art Howe in my mind is like dead in the eyes trying to feel something um you could like you could be a do with like a lot of like moxie like hey what's out there and and doesn't none of that [ __ ] will it just like okay yeah that makes sense I need some deeper than that I need something that's gonna make me feel something I need him off looking a leather jacket to bring over shrooms and some crazy obscure French film and what's the Venn diagram look like if we're if we're considering Disney hoes what does that Venn diagram look like Disney hoes and art hoes yeah is there a little crossover they're both they're both hopes yeah they both like animation okay art to some degree yeah yeah but they're not one of the same don't get confused okay I cannot stand an adult Disney person yeah okay [ __ ] oh man oh man I don't know if that's the thing at every Best Buy but the best why I worked at a ton of the [ __ ] got Disneyland season passes every year yeah I'll go in a group that [ __ ] I just I don't know some about it made me just like that yeah I don't understand the season pass stuff I don't understand that I guess you have to go a lot you have to go a lot I mean if we live near there got it but yeah I guess that kind of makes sense cuz then you but it's still like yeah it's still like 25 bucks for parking I just even if you go to just like get drinks or whatever yeah like you've still got a [ __ ] walk all the way to the grounds you got a you know you know what that's what it is that's why I think I don't know I agree with you and on top of that I think I'm realizing know why I don't [ __ ] with Disneyland I don't understand the emotional investment in any of the characters past the age of 9 years old but it's not really the characters that you're that you're into is it like supposed to be nostalgia or like something like that it's not even histology because that like there's so much to like look at this is my depression I have to ask you what you're supposed to feel exactly what do you feel we're going to what is the feeling yeah what it what is it what does what does it feel like what does it feel like to be in there Joey yeah yeah no it's not like nostalgia I got a little nostalgia because I used to go there as a kid yeah but it's more it's more like just tons of [ __ ] to look at okay it's like sensory overload you know like it has a [ __ ] that you just go it feel like there's infinite possibilities when you're walking around there okay so you as my therapist now that's how I know I'm depressed for sure like even the bit that we did on Instagram yeah like that was like a thing that you can only do at Disneyland you know there's like infinite things to do they're like [ __ ] what but what we'd like to the straight face oh you didn't see that no it's like my most like the Instagram ever know like visited the happiest place on earth and we were just dead face and everything but it's like we're on the roller coaster like dead faced and like yeah this is probably just how I looked yeah smash that like that's funny yeah but it's just like you know this I don't know I just feel like there's an infinite possibilities there okay Disneyland infinite possibilities Umbra you a Disney ho then no I was just legitimately surprised at how much fun I had because I got there and I was like I'm just not looking forward to this and then I was like this is [ __ ] awesome maybe I need to give another chance yeah yeah yeah go down there and just [ __ ] yeah spend some money you know yes way too much money there that's one thing if the call your [ __ ] it would call your accountant after you go yeah hey I had a lot of fun what are we looking at you're gonna have a damn well we [ __ ] went to Star Wars land which is the new one okay and they're like so all the employees there are in character as like Star Wars people obviously you had fun because you got the most lit like the most modern version of Disneyland you know like with the Fast Pass that sounds tight not having to wait for that [ __ ] and say you're describing yeah you know yeah the Star Wars is generally lends itself to a cool experience it's like kind of just going to a [ __ ] giant like adult playground for a little bit you know now you a [ __ ] so you walk into the Star Wars land and there's like there's like they're selling coke but they have like a deal with Star Wars where they hook where they have where they have where they have custom coke bottles and they're like little orbs with these crazy Star Wars like lids on them or whatever and I walked up and I was like how much for one of these cuz I wanted to just like buy one just stuff I can have it yeah and she was like six units and I was like you what is wasn't six units is what is that in dollars and she was like they're that they're in equal currency and I was like that's that's cool six [ __ ] dollars he just spaz on her that was like that's funny I like the little character thing that you did six [ __ ] units you [ __ ] six units for a coke are you kidding me where's this that there needs to be more of that in Star Wars in general yeah yeah just let me speak to the manager people just like painting through like some [ __ ] Star Wars bar it's like like looks really cool look at the sign there's a guy and like a [ __ ] [ __ ] some crazy I don't know styrofoam suit 17 units 17 units for this [ __ ] thing unfuckin real you know the town I come from I get wasted for the second half this this is tattoo ain't for you I guess god this place is gentrified as [ __ ] everybody who Tatooine it's just a bunch of [ __ ] white people ruining my [ __ ] unbelievable ah and then she looked at Kelsey's like pin she'd have paint on this at happy birthday yeah and she was like happy origin day oh look and I was like that's good six units see hold on kill it dude usually or what's or G or GJ it's or G day oh no sir I said origin Oh quite up in the mountain you're sick so it's a six units for the drink or six units for the origin are we talking about here is it that time yes damn we're gonna hit the full screen hit the hole hit the hole hit the old dusty trail yeah anyways Disneyland go we just ever told Disneyland you know what we did was we advertised Disneyland and we advertised barstool sports for this whole thing I mean now [ __ ] all that join our telegram feed what is it again I don't know a g6 and I just posted a picture of ninja in there a few days ago that's even active TMG we have 470 subscribers pretty good its TDOT TDOT me slash TMG 69 if you just go in Safari and do that it'll take you to telegram and T dot me slash TMG 69 oh here's a funny thing ninja was on the masked singer no way yeah singing or judging he was singing hmm here's the thing I just found out last night they [ __ ] lip-sync love yeah they're just in the masks dancing around they don't actually sing Oh [ __ ] network television is that [ __ ] what it doesn't that make you mad I thought t-pain won the last one if I was actually singing he he might've cuz he can actually sing but what do you think the odds are that ninja what uh what uh what uh oh oh oh oh that is slimy and if you could if you could guess the song that he sang what would you guess the pompon song no ii guess um just think of the most the most song um hold on that you could sing right now just a frame bar Mario right now current day the most song [ __ ] I don't know um that's something my MGMT I don't what's the most popular song call me maybe right now oh hello again the most popular song on earth for the past six months uh I haven't heard a radio in a minute so you're just getting so [ __ ] fired up over this this is great um I don't know man some little country inspired oh no yep no he didn't uh mm-hmm what did his voice sound like singing that [ __ ] let's pull it up let's pull it up and just play it into Tom day huh oh you wanna pull it up on there yeah ninja Old Town Road no ninja mask singer search Oh be something like something like oh no no no no we got something right here [Applause] [Music] like that doesn't sound live does it oh maybe it is please live dude maybe it is I think he's saying crosstown but I mean bro a little bit of live compression a little bit of auto-tune you know saying they could run that [ __ ] through something give him a little help they definitely do give him a little help definitely do you know like he's just dry up there oh damn I yeah damn yeah shame on you not believing what inja no it's not me not believing in ninja well no I guess I guess it's both it's both he's the best game on earth if you think he can't conquer singing you think singing is beyond him have you seen his [ __ ] 90s and fortnight dude are you joking me that fool did it right he said [ __ ] this I'm gonna mix her sign a huge deal now he can say [ __ ] come [ __ ] [ __ ] and now he just [ __ ] doesn't like you know he's as Network shake yeah it's like TV career celebrity now yeah it's like why he'd the best [ __ ] did the best you did it he did it right man he's got a good agent he's got a good manager you [ __ ] if you seen him on mixer lately you didn't give a [ __ ] dude now it's great really yeah there's like some clip of him being like Who am I I'm [ __ ] and he just starts like going I was like he's [ __ ] stupid [ __ ] 12 year olds that come on the internet like just wow just just gamer get off my lawn Wow he's the gamer version of get off my lawn yeah he's a millennial boomer yeah get off my get off my Twitter you dumb place it where'd you come from yeah [ __ ] stain there's my profile you can't come to my profile hey there [ __ ] stick I'm trying to do this shitty a Gran Torino voice what um we got a lot of time we could do this till [ __ ] 12:30 if we fell you want to go a whole other hour you say come early yeah just half hour earlier okay Oh 30 yeah um I'm gonna take my horse to the whole town role isn't here mystic ride until I can no more I thought I was gonna get up there and just like crazy R&B vocals that would be so [ __ ] sick you just came out there you got out there which is pipes of an angel those jeans [Music] from me in those jeans and he starts like yeah he starts grinding oh yeah he's [ __ ] he's like they said I'm washed up ha ha I gotta show what I'm really about [Laughter] just singing that [ __ ] why he's [ __ ] and then he like then he [ __ ] starts a new careers and R&B singer yeah yeah still wearing that oh man yeah that [ __ ] louisv suit blue face featuring ninja gotta be the next yeah something yeah ninja rap in bro anyways y'all about this episode I don't know how do you feel about this episode a little bit as a little if you don't know that sometimes we have episodes like this you're not a true TMZ fan goodbye goodbye let's go let's get a sink tough one okay a good clean goodbye okay goodbye

Channel: Tiny Meat Gang

Views: 815,207

Rating: 4.9206519 out of 5

Keywords: Cody Ko, Noel Miller, Tiny Meat Gang, Stoner

Id: mCym-7L7JE8

Length: 87min 38sec (5258 seconds)

Published: Thu Oct 03 2019