Episode 162 - We're Dating Elon Musk

what's up guys welcome to the tmg podcast this is actually today's episode today's free episode but if you want uh the bonus episode that went up today as well you can find that on our patreon that's patreon.com tinymeatgang and uh the the free episode will be ad free as well on there so uh and if not thanks and enjoy this one peace peace if me and my gang pull up all right how's that that's pretty good how's this and me if me and my gang pull up how's that a little swimwear song it's me my gang pull up i like that i love vibrato nice how's that it's good guys we're we're live from our capsules today you know shit's a little scary right now so we just thought um mom we just play it safe this week virtually i know i know you guys don't like this but we promise we will not look at our phones during this whole time yeah yeah hold on i just got to send a text yeah it's good hold on i'm playing this really fun game right now oh my toe is stuck in the um is it stuck in my router pull the sam here it is a virtual episode today but but that being said we're making up for it by having a very special guest on extremely special for the second half of this podcast yeah if if we've coordinated it correctly i don't know if we have honestly it's it's up to we just got the number and so it's i mean it's like it's basically up to him whether he wants to join this zoom at some point or not i'm hoping that he does it we can hope he just does it randomly oh like i gave i mean i gave kyle the link so maybe he'll just pop in i'm like what up boys and then just leave ladies and gentlemen you wouldn't believe it we got newt gingrich on this this week's episode people were like what the [ __ ] we got pete boudija ladies and gentlemen rob dear deck hey i'm trying to think of someone so so completely out like far out from our from our group or our fans or oh wait wait wait wait ladies and gentlemen we got reggie watts on the podcast today no that would make sense no wouldn't he he's like actually musically talented and he's funny he's funny i would love to have him on the podcast reggie watson's [ __ ] good man maybe one day man um anyways yeah uh guys we have nancy pelosi on today's episode we actually had a story of someone telling me that he was blasting an old episode where we did like the most racist podcast in the world bit and that played out loud to new co-workers wait i didn't a listener just messaged me said dude i was playing an old episode where you guys did the this is the most racist podcast on the internet welcome back to the racist hour and he said that played out loud i think he said he had a new job oh no and he's trying to do the whole no it it's a joke they don't actually no i'm fired okay got it so rest in peace of that man's career rip dude i mean [ __ ] sorry bro sorry not really you take a risk yeah exactly that's your fault yeah you cannot listen to this show on speakers some of you have not learned anyhow what's been happening this week a lot and not a lot what have what has happened we just need to be comfortable asking that question you know i think we always try to pretend that uh we have [ __ ] to talk about purely from memory here's one thing the six nine documentary came out on hulu i haven't watched it yet but there's like no plenty of people asking us to comment on that no why does the record we saw the whole thing we literally live the whole thing in real time yeah this is a weird trend now of documentaries coming out like a month after the storyline concludes who's that documentary for 50 year old women that just saw a rainbow hair guy in the news and they said i actually got this yes i think that's what it's for i mean uh yeah i think it's for they said he's an ms-13 yeah yeah exactly he's got rainbow hair and he's a rapper unbelievable what they should they should have just made a documentary where none of it's factual about him oh my god that would have gone bananas oh yeah oh yeah like he was the first he's actually the first person to go to space no no it has to be believable i think you know he started out he was one of the original you know he he was one of the original delivery drivers for the amazon prime uh or amazon fresh division you know he was one of the first hired drivers and he said [ __ ] this man i'm pursuing music and so elton john actually gave him his start elton john came across como and he said who is this and elton john's people had to explain well this is a parody i want to know the original and elton heard gumo and he said this is genius who is this kid this is garbage i like the original i like the first one i like come on first the whole documentary should be about six nine beefing with the gate it did come out now six nine's career he never got paid appropriately for his career because the como writer took it all yeah now that's the story line yeah i was just trying to you know do unrelated semi-related i started a show on netflix it's called undercover it's a dutch show or something or something okay um it's dubbed i like it a lot you should check it out dude what's it called undercover okay what's it about uh it's basically it's about some town in in uh scandinavia i forget where but they produce a lot of ecstasy there okay so this series is based on real events of two people going undercover living part-time or living casually next to the head of it all and trying to get into his life and you know so far i'm liking it some parts are on the nose but it's a it's an enjoyable series so what why is it that so much ecstasy is produced there i mean dutch people man they're just down they just like to do it that's why they make so much do it yeah yeah where else are you gonna get it when dutch police go to seize drugs and they see his ecstasy they they they pass some back they just divvy up the bag they say well we take too fresh for later and they're all barged and then you take the rest of this and then and then the people they're arresting get the drugs back no they get the drugs back they get the drugs back so that they can take the drugs in prison so that the time and the dutch prison can pass right better right right yeah yeah that makes sense what is it what is a dutch prison anyway um making making clogged shoes no that's too much labor oh okay yeah it's probably just chilling just i mean clearly we saw we saw asaps prisoners dude that's my dorm dude wasn't that in sweden sweden scandinavia yeah that's all it's all close right i remember there's a people kept talking about this one ecstasy producer [ __ ] what was his name wait hold up thinking about ecstasy producers like actual producers is just so funny it literally was like that he had a brain yeah it was um what was it he made the orange teslas you ever heard of those let's just google it famous accent they had the tesla logo on them and um and this guy's name was cp cp yeah hold on let me google that real quick i just searched who produced orange tesla mdma elon musk elon's an idiot he did tequila he should have just sold mdma orange the whole drug underworld is profited off my brand for years and it's time for me to take it back so i've created my own ecstasy and with the new tesla autopilot you can take the ecstasy on the highway and you don't have to worry about crashing into anyone and you can absolutely roll your tits off i mean um without having to worry also covet is fake also covet is fake indeed he did you see that tweet that was like i just took two pcr tests or four pcr tests two of them were negative two of them are positive something bogus is going on here it's it's so funny that the way he just does not tweet like a billionaire the way rich people tweet about kovid is the same way we act when we get a parking ticket or when we get pulled over it's so funny they're like oh dude i took my thing and like i don't know how i got it there's no way there's no way yeah yeah it's but i was doing like 80. this sucks this [ __ ] blows man i gotta stay inside for a week so lame dude um yeah but i don't it's just funny like the way that elon he just tweets his thoughts you know yeah something's weird something weird is going on here and you're like you know how many people trust your word like god like how many 14 year olds now that think covet testing is rigged because you just tweeted that that's that's why he does it man yeah elon wants to be more celebrity than he does uh a tech guy anymore he's he's transcended being the smart guy now he just wants to be the hot smart rich guy yeah i mean yeah i think that's what he always wanted to be bet you he leaks his nudes yeah i think he's going to do something weird like that like a like a like a pornhub tape is going to come out no like not that nothing yeah what i feel like he would just tweet a picture of grimes with pasties on covering her hoo-ha standing in front of him and he'd be like regular sunday quarantine going just right man i just got a visceral thought of him clapping grimes as [ __ ] oh god no his surprise ass belly button gross dude hit the [ __ ] the surprised emoji front dad bod that he has just two tiny nipples and his big old belly button like just bouncing off her lower back jesus christ oh lord i pretty much saw that man remember i know dude the 180 you did there i'll never forget because i remember just taking it out in person i saw grimes and elon musk making out in person i saw that and that's a real story and i turned around and noel and i was like part of me i kind of feel like if they would have seen me see them like grimes would have come over or maybe elon would have come over and be like come come here son come here you just you try you're not supposed to and he grabs me by the hair like this and holds me up and grinds slits my throat and you gotta watch me just bleed out all over no i picture he just come up to you and be like you try and then he makes out with you and then grimes is just watching with a big ass smile no grimes comes over there and she's all like maybe she tries seducing us what is this some sort of group sex thing and then she goes in like this and just sucks the soul out of our body just hands us two orange teslas cp's my best friend cp that's the guy's name if anyone knows any any more info on this guy cp on the on the tabs he was the he he was the most famous ecstasy producer i'm pretty sure and then stopped once 911 happened or something like that i forget what happened is there is there like a silk road youtube for drug production where it's like you know a beat tutorial it's like some 17 year old kid in the suburbs yell it up it's your boy hot bars um just gonna teach y'all how to press xanax super straightforward i bet you there is man not cutting with fent that shit's so whack dude [ __ ] fan [ __ ] fan forever um anyways dog so yeah i'm going to go ahead and get it started so first going to start like sodium nitrate it's just this go what are you saying no just like this lazy ass tutorial it's like like the cuts are all bad added this add that yeah add potassium typically me i like to cut a little bit of inositol in my xanax because i feel you don't really need the full xanax no it's only needed a little bit this is a tick tock that's what it is it's a super fast-paced tick-tock tutorial yeah what's up today i'm going to teach you how to make x comment if you want more comment what you want to see next look at what i sent to the talking points that's the ultimate ecstasy pills right there branded with the reddit logo yes dude this guy was posting it on reddit a picture of accessing with the reddit logo brandon he says beautiful little [ __ ] aren't they unreal unreal my favorite press they're closer to 250 but same diff very available in socal and bay area cp reddits are my favorite press by far isn't this crazy dude that's such an unfortunate sentence that someone's gonna cut out of context right there oh yeah cp is an awful brand name it's just an awful acronym never use that for anything cody's and now welcome to cody cp hour ladies and gentlemen we have one question for you what's the question what is honey what is honey well it's a sweetener of course but also these days it feels like online shopping is the only shopping we really do that's where today's sponsor honey comes in it's the free browser extension that scours the internet for promo codes and automatically tests them when you're checking out honey is basically your online shopping best friend here's how it works you get honey on your computer for free and two easy clicks boom boom one two then when you're checking out on one of its over 30 000 supported sites honey pops up and all you have to do is click apply coupons you wait a few seconds as honey searches for coupons for that site if honey finds working coupons it'll apply the best one to your cart automatically bam it's literally the easiest thing ever i use it on pretty much everything i buy online it's just boom boom and then it saves me money i love it it's it's great it's simple if you have a computer honey should be on it it's free and it works with whatever browser you use you can get honey for free today at joinhoney.com tmg j that is j o i n h o n e y dot com slash tmg joinhoney.com tmg uh hit that up so they know we sent you thanks honey for supporting today's episode i just remember i remember i just remember looking into this guy's story because i thought it was really interesting because someone told me about it sometime they said okay cp this is ma the main exporter of ecstasy this guy would make like thousands and thousands and thousands of pills and send them to the united states from sweden and he would sell a [ __ ] ton on the silk road and then i guess when that happened or something like that he stopped making pills for like three years and then all of a sudden started it again like disappeared off the face of the earth and then all of a sudden started making hundreds of thousands of pills again and importing them i wonder what his his view and his take is on making this stuff you know is he a dude that looks at it like it's a craft and in his mind oh uh i'm just making something that people enjoy and i can't control how people use them you know that's not on me but this is a beautiful thing or is he is he just thinking yeah i'm gonna make a [ __ ] ton of money and i don't care you know i don't know because you got to think like if you if you if he didn't care how people felt then there's no point to the brands the reason why they brand the pills is because then people get used to the way one of them feels and they can find whichever one they like it whichever one they have the most fun on and then they know that everyone that looks like that is going to feel the same or they know with a certain degree of certainty that it will yeah i guess with illicit drugs you never know but that's kind of the point is that like oh the orange teslas were the best because everyone felt like they i don't even know that that that you could have the the advil of ecstasy you know what i mean oh like the like oh yeah like the main one yeah yeah yeah you know like it's all it's all ibuprofen but you know advil yeah yeah i didn't i didn't i didn't even know that yeah this is the ecstasy hour by the way someone clanging their beads together yeah let me explain you know if someone's rolling right now listening to this i want to know bro we talked about this rolling let's see new podcast here let's we can help you out imagine rolling listening to the [ __ ] the [ __ ] that we watched in the bonus episode last week oh god oh this guy's eating me out dude what the [ __ ] what the [ __ ] turn it off i can't feel my hands that's not really ecstasy that that's that's that's wild i didn't know that i learned something today yeah it's interesting ecstasys have different different vibes is that is there an intentionally bad ecstasy this one makes you feel [ __ ] bad dude when would you ever want to do that one maybe you just have such a good life what i want to feel paranoid take this man it's booger flavor this is the booger flavor what what does the jelly bean [ __ ] birds spurts every flavored beans or whatever birdie bots every flavored beans birdie bots yeah but it's all it's all different kinds of ecstasies this makes you really itchy it gives you a shape like an anchovy yeah this one sucks dude this one sucks why i mean you feel decent but it tastes like fish and you just taste fish for an hour it's just mdma and xlax this one makes you roll and [ __ ] your brains at the same time this one it just gives you temporary eczema for six hours it just makes you really itchy and kind of euphoric it's very strange it's funny because like literally weed is like that to me i just know it's gonna make me feel like [ __ ] and when i used to smoke it it's like i went into it knowing that i would feel bad yeah i know that once i put this in my body i'm gonna wish i never did it yeah yeah i've never had that reaction to weed i was always surprised when you told me that what about like coffee though what about that because you said coffee gave you anxiety and for me it still does that but for some reason i like the taste so much i'm like i'm just going to do it and even though i know i'm going to feel like ass mm-hmm it's kind of like sorry go ahead no no no no you finished well i'm just going to say it it's like i remember hearing about my friend's brother that basically this guy he's like really successful guy really you know like he's kind of hardened mentally right yeah really uh determined and i don't know he's just successful right yeah he felt like [ __ ] for a certain period of time so he like did this survey on himself where he would just stop eating and drinking a certain thing week by week stop drinking dairy stop drinking sugar or eating eating sugar for a week until he found what was making him feel like [ __ ] i was like that takes so much uh self-control that i just don't have man uh tom's home he went through something similar he was getting some crazy like he couldn't figure it out some crazy allergic reaction and he had to go on a similar diet it wasn't so extreme it was the inverse he cut everything out at once and then slowly added stuff back in but there was a month or five week period where you know for one week he's just eating oatmeal and then the next week he has something else something else and tom showed me pictures this dude dropped 20 pounds he looked bad tom and his friends would ask him are you alive they all went and hung out at some lake house and he fell asleep and tom said they were joking i think putting their fingers under his nose or something to check if he's breathing you know okay jesus christ but yeah yeah do you think you could ever like lose a [ __ ] on a weight for a roll like i look at stuff like i don't care about that art of acting that much where i would say yeah i want to torture myself yeah yeah i could i could get buff for a roll that i can do i mean what if they said like 5 million bucks would you lose 15 pounds like starve yourself 15 million is 15 million what's my role like what's the movie you are um let's see you are a skinny streamer yup skinny what's my movie what's my role you work in a warehouse okay and you are sick no that's not it's a really sad movie about you losing a lot of weight because you're sick so just a guy at home depot with like dysentery yeah just diarrhea yeah it's a really sad movie about you pooping all the time i'm losing a bunch of weight come on daniel hurry up bring those hoses here it's about to be it's about to be gardening season we need all the hoses at the front ball so i can't i got the rear again you always got the real boy move those hoses you sound like chappelle a little bit oops did you watch his by the way his monologue is great right he i mean you know other people have said this i'm not the first one to say this but you know he's just um i he's just in a such a mind state where and i've seen people say that carlin got to this point where you know it was beyond stand-up it's just public speaking yeah and i think that's the craziest thing about him is he doesn't really have to joke so that you want to watch him talk i think that part is crazy yeah now that's just such a dope place to be in you just get on stage and say i want to just pontificate yeah yeah now i almost feel like some of the jokes like took away from it at some point because we all just wanted to hear him make it an important statement yeah on a day as iconic as that day the thing i didn't catch that other people noticed was at the end of the monologue he said good night and he dropped the microphone but what i didn't catch was he's sort of just implying no one's going to watch snl and i didn't even that part didn't even occur to me because i literally turned it off after he said good night and i even processed the fact that that was on snl there was a whole show afterward that i didn't give a [ __ ] about i said oh so he didn't say welcome to snl at the very end he said good night and he just threw the microphone down jesus christ hard as nails bro that's pretty dope he's like this is about me yeah yeah see ya sorry i had a joke and i lost it but yeah that [ __ ] was i so from that i just a few days later i went back and watched old chappelle show just sketches and oh man there's no way now oh yeah no way any of that yeah oh man yeah but they were hilarious jesus christ dude the opening one of season one where he's parodying that old mitsubishi commercial with the girl dancing that [ __ ] just threw me for such a loop because i was crying first of all remembering that dumbass commercial do you remember that [ __ ] no it's the there's it was for the eclipse and it was just it was the eclipse with these you know extended exposure lights going through the commercial and she's just in the in the eclipse like oh oh yeah yeah i do remember that and so the the bit was chappelle driving and this girl's in the passenger seat and they're listening to edm and she just like won't stop dancing and he's looking at her saying this [ __ ] ever stopped [ __ ] is wrong with you and then he kicks her out and he gets another girl in the car and then they're driving around the street and they pass by the girl that he kicked out and she's just on the corner still going at it that you can make that now no you can definitely make that now but there's this whole bit where they show the uh they show other footage that was cut out of the other girl dancing in the car and like her her titty pops out and they freeze frame on chappelle looking over at her tit he's i'm just sitting there like come on titty i was like geez man hilarious damn so funny and then don't and before all of you go oh noelle thinks titties popping out it's funny i yes i do titties are funny titties can be very funny yeah you know just and awesome too tits are yeah yeah boobs boobs are cool man hot take amp zonkers godday cody likes breast and with that being said newt gingrich everybody newt how do you feel about titties five and now listen we might have to we might have to uh so he looks like he was an hour away or something like that so maybe we could pause recording and pick it back up when he's in the like ready to to pop in the zoom okay what's that guys bro what's that smell well i'll tell you what that smell is it's fresh pre-measured pre-measured ingredients and mouth-watering seasonal recipes delivered right to your door with hellofresh america's number one meal kit it's easy and it's stress-free all right you like cooking but you don't like the hassle of going to the store and getting measuring the ingredients and all that stuff hello fresh it does it all for you they offer convenient no contact delivery to your doorstep for easy home cooking with the family it cuts out stressful meal planning and grocery store trips so you can enjoy cooking and get to dinner get dinner on the table in about 30 minutes yeah it's flexible for your lifestyle easily change your delivery days or meal preferences and skip a week whenever you need to write on the app keep your fridge stocked by adding extra meals or additional proteins quick meals like breakfast on the go or their 10-minute lunches even desserts to satisfy that sweet tooth cody they're looking at you bro sweet tooth um hello fresh is also committed to giving back okay they've donated uh to those in need so far in 2020 they've donated 3.5 million meals all right that's a lot of meals yeah and uh you can help too with hello fresh's beyond the box program where you give nutritious meals to those experiencing food insecurity with just a couple clicks in the app bam kelsey and i cooked with hellofresh all last week and uh it was great the the most of all the recipes are just really good we cooked this bibimbap recipe and it legitimately was like in a penne one and it really tastes like restaurant food it's [ __ ] awesome um so if you want to try hello fresh just go to hellofresh.com tinymeat90 and use the code tinymeat90 to get ninety dollars off including free shipping that's code tinymeat90 at hellofresh.com tinymeat90 to get 90 bucks off including free shipping wow okay ladies and gentlemen welcome to the second half we did a we did a little um a ritual during the break and we actually changed the the time of day yeah what we were wearing yeah so it just completely teleported us dude it's a new thing that we're starting yeah where we want to be dressed differently for the second half just as a little like keep it spicy for the people listening especially because you can almost feel our different outfits you know yeah you can feel we're kind of like we're dif it's different energy you know i'm wearing a white hoodie which is stupid you know white hoodies are dumb i was about to make a bad joke what white hoodie um oh is that like a like a white hood is that every time yeah yeah okay okay it's such a i don't mean bad like edgy i mean bad like hack i think recently people have confused that by the way on my end i have this super villain lighting and the footage is gonna look super funny to nate it looks [ __ ] ridiculous to me right now i mean on camera over here dude my bald spot is hot as hell this looks like oh i don't have a wrong spot excuse me excuse me i don't have a ball spot it appears that way oh i was like damn dude my headphones bugging out you drop your computer or something why does this look like an eyesight camera from 2000. that's that's what i'm using i'm using my webcam but you know nate will have the proper footage gotcha okay dude it's been a weird 24 hours okay free why what happened it's been a weird it's been a weird week okay let me just say this okay um we were freaking out we had a little bit of a covet scare turned out to be nothing okay but we were freaking out okay so that was on our minds a lot and then finally yesterday we realized it wasn't anything everyone came back negative over and over again we got this like 50 times day after day and everything's fine right and then yesterday devin says i have a birthday gift i want to bring it to you okay and so i i was like okay cool and he was like he's okay i'm coming over right now and kelsey kelsey texas or kelsey looks at me she goes dev or like five minutes later she goes devin's here you gotta go upstairs i was like why what the [ __ ] does he have it's not wrapped i don't understand why can i just sit here she's like no go upstairs and you have to go all the way up and close the door i'm like okay [ __ ] this is so unnecessary i go up and uh and i'm like what is this gonna be like a spider or some [ __ ] he's gonna prank me like this is stupid right and he comes in and i hear them downstairs talking whatever and she's there she's like all right you can come down now and i come down there's a blanket over something it looked like a david dobrik video one of his old prank videos and i was like what is this and i and i pick up the blanket and it's a it's a box from petsmart i'm like dude what is this are you kidding me i still thought it was a prank at this point oh chili's running where this is going chili's running around and they're like pick it up pick it up put it on the table because chili's gonna get it and i'm like you guys are [ __ ] with me right there's not an actual real live animal in this [ __ ] thing and i open it and there's a full-on four-month old bearded dragon in there that he bought for me as a birthday gift okay he said here here have a have a have a 10-year commitment yeah have a reptile reptile here have a reptile man and the best part about it is that today i had to go just now go to the pet store and buy like hundreds of dollars worth of [ __ ] because he didn't buy any of the right [ __ ] and i so oh hold i spent all day looking at videos of how to properly care for your bearded dragon because meanwhile this little dude is like in this tank that's way too small he's burning under the [ __ ] light that they it's like they got all the wrong [ __ ] and so i'm like researching how to care for this thing that i didn't want and i'm spending hundreds of dollars on it so now you've got a dog and then a kid with eczema yeah pretty much i have a dog and then a smaller dog with a skin condition bro that's what that's what uh having a skin condition is is being a you're just a reptile yeah you have the reptile gene yeah yeah yeah that's what you need man is like a little um you need like a uv lamp a proper uv lamp you know kids with eczema three qualities uh temperamental skin colored eyes and they eat flies i looked at your story and i said man this guy's going crazy he just moves and he's like [ __ ] more animals oh no no it was not my choice i'm not sad about it at all i think it's actually awesome that's actually probably the best way to get a new pet for someone like me yeah that's scared of commitment and scared of not being able to do what i wanted to say on to you yeah exactly just surprise here care for this thing now and i'm like well no choice got to do it you know hold on my um my headphone jack sounds like um an alien is fingering my ears hold on all good what does it sound like i think this is what it sounds like when you get abducted like no one can hear this is that what it sounds like yo did you put on a voice effect hello hey can you hear me all right and tapping back in now i fixed the alien tell the people at home what you were saying so the the podcast that i was doing with i heart radio is called the pleasure is ours the pleasure is and today today is thursday this this episode is going up basically right after we record it because we're already late because we're supposed to have a guest and i'll explain that too but we did so the episode is live it just went live today and the last episode is with noel so it's basically just another episode of this podcast so it's our way of saying sorry that this episode stunk so bad but yeah that one that one was fun though i think there was some funny [ __ ] in there for sure there's definitely funny [ __ ] in there it's a it was a little bit more structured than this but still we kind of just did what we do and we just [ __ ] around people are gonna listen to that and go yeah you should just do every episode like this because this other [ __ ] you guys have been doing is terrible man no that'll be a good substitute for this cursed [ __ ] episode this is a cursed ass episode and um go ahead sorry sorry no we should just tell kyle this one's like to title it this one is cursed yeah the cursed episode well yeah let the folks know who we're supposed to hang with okay so well you guys already know a couple a couple weeks back uh we were we were we carrington from love island hit us up yeah noel said you wanna be on the podcast and he was like yeah for sure and so he was gonna come through and do it in person and then it was coveted thing uh we were like let's just do it virtually and for some reason we just are the worst when it comes to scheduling like i don't know why we didn't like i don't know follow up with him or whatever because he was on a [ __ ] he was on a flight he couldn't even have done it we thought that he was going to be at a hotel because i think he told kyle that he was going to be here at that time or something i don't know what happened but we completely [ __ ] it and so it's going to happen next week instead yeah and we were supposed to like he was going to jump in the zoom and we were gonna record it right then when we were doing the first half of this episode but it didn't work so yeah well just much like everything well you know you'll you'll you guys will be glad to know that we're finally gonna get some additional help with this [ __ ] yeah yeah yeah we're we're working on finding like a like a big big boy producer who's gonna help dial everything in so yeah yeah take us to the next level yeah take us to the level we should have been at dude i ran over my [ __ ] phone yeah so do you want to talk about that today is so cursed yeah yeah yeah everything is so cursed yeah about it i gotta go feed a [ __ ] lizard live crickets after this he's hungry he hasn't eaten in like a few hours i think i don't know how to i don't know everything i read about how to feed a bearded dragon is different so i don't know what i'm doing you should just feed them pizza see what happens no that's what we're eating tonight pizza hey i might just go sorry go ahead you ran over your phone do you want to talk about this don't reveal too much though no no no i won't actually maybe that's the most i should say yeah i ran over my phone you guys will find out soon okay yeah so and wait you called me from your watch i called you for one first of all being able to make phone calls from your apple watch is the most power ranger [ __ ] that you can do i'm like driving i'm like hello hello hello hello i made me cody come in yeah there's an issue at the tmg studio i'll be their stat no you have to touch your you have to touch your air pod and speak into your yeah into your apple watch i'm on my way yeah so i'm my i bust my phone and i'm making calls because people are texting me and stuff and i'm like i can't respond to anything and i'm making calls from my phone and i said why do i need a phone i just have this thing oh yeah maybe you just want to cruise through a just like a grocery store or something just like yeah yeah and then i said totally yeah dude she sucked my [ __ ] off dude no i'm not kidding man she really sucked it dude it sucked it for some reason it's like the hand position is worse to me than speaking on speaker because on speaker having some [ __ ] on speakers like this person really doesn't give a [ __ ] but apple watch speaker is like you're really trying to be annoying to the base dude she went to the base [ __ ] that'd be a great milk prank oh yeah they got to do that one also just standing beside a dude at a grocery store and being like dude tell she suck my [ __ ] here tell him and holding your watch up to this guy what's your name yeah i've never had you know that to me was the most tech experience i've had in my life this feature is dumb as hell what is it calling from your watch like yeah i mean clearly it's helpful in one situation i think that's why they made it it's for that exact situation yeah when people smash their incredibly fragile phones do you have a crack in your phone yet i the very first day i had it i was riding the scuzza yeah and uh excuse me by the way guys is one of those bikes from the uh the no flex music video yeah did i tell you about the leaning thing yeah yeah yeah i told you about that yeah yeah so the very first day i had i think it was that day i was cruising around thinking that i was like thought i looked cool and then my phone flew out of my pocket and landed on the ground like literally right after i unpackage it you want to know what else i lost my macbook pro charger and then i lost my earpods and so i switched back to my old airpods and i just i was gonna go for a run yesterday and i open the case and they're not in there i lost those too i'm just a piece of [ __ ] i can't i'm almost 30 i'm 30 now why can't i handle my [ __ ] man some 30 year old birthday bro i [ __ ] i'm 30 i can't even find my airpods who am i i'm a mess oh man dude yeah um i just can't wait for this cursed ass experience to be over so i can hit next week fresh and right and i'm moving tomorrow well between oh let's hope that god that's not cursed no you know what bro that's the one that's a pot that's a positive i mean that's a positive thing there's a handful of positive things today but the um shout out shout out to my my contractor bro yeah shout out to my contractor i'm saying big things we're coming up we got contractors inside of my contractor shout out my contractor shout out my security lady she's hot yo big shout out my electrician yeah he hooks it up man my electric timers and everything so far electrician is fire dude so far soul fire dog yeah so shout out my contractor what did he do why are you shouting him out no he's just he listens to this no no but no he's just like we didn't we didn't have too much going on in our place but it was basically a recommendation like yo dude you have these random odds and ends that are like just one step above a handyman like it requires some people um but you know basically we got a recommendation so this guy's awesome and he'll take care of it and we hit him up and he's like yeah i got some time so i told him about my panel my studio panels because i was really dreading having to spend any money i'm like god [ __ ] we're moving i don't wanna whatever so i call him and he's like oh yeah i could move those no problem and he made him work in the new space and so we went up to the new spot and it's just like my studio's gonna move like clean so episode next week for sure wait what you're using the same panels and it works yep works oh what that's sick yeah just just clean oh that's so nice oh my god that's a blessing that's a blessing the guy the guy that came through and did this was like yeah you could sell your old panels there's tons of people looking for these right now because everyone's i guess trying to like treat their rooms because a lot of music is being made right now yeah and um oh yeah and everyone's working from home yeah probably for resume actually i don't know i was like how much can i get for these things like probably 100 bucks a pop i listed them on craigslist offer me up everything nothing not a single [ __ ] hit no nothing i can't believe you know what's so funny that guy goes you sell him 100 a piece how much are you selling them for bro oh we're doing them like six six hundred eighty yeah yeah so many people need these it's crazy i get calls for this every day people need my service yeah yeah no we sell them for way we [ __ ] you guys yeah because you need these so we [ __ ] you i had another guy come spec out my uh my new spot and you know what crazy thing my my new place my new office is a little bit smaller but i kind of like it more i kind of like it more yeah i was listening to um or i was watching one of my old videos as i do i watch all my own [ __ ] all the time go back and watch how funny i used to be and um the audio is a lot better in my old studio i noticed because it's just smaller yep and the treatment was better it's like being in a closet with a bunch of clothes like the audio in there is the best it could ever be so if you're if you're at home right now listening to our podcast and you and and you have an itch to be creative and you've been thinking like uh but i need but no you don't no you don't yeah okay tim the tatman does it in a six by seven room and now bro there's so many acoustic panels on [ __ ] craigslist what the [ __ ] everyone's trying to dump them that's that's good that's good news oh bro also um you know what i said i'm glad that this second half was delayed because in the last half we were so our brains were so melted from all the [ __ ] we had done earlier that day and i said man what really happened this week i'll go nothing really bro boosie and benny the butcher both got shot in the leg oh yeah i saw that benny's fine i think they took his chains which makes me sad but you know he's got this line where he says you want my chain we'll come take it it's kind of [ __ ] hard wow i mean someone did take them so they did that but i mean is this the guy that got shot in the face the guy that no that's conway oh okay right right okay benny got shot in the leg but here's the crazy thing about actually i don't know when lucy was shot in the leg but i i don't want to spread fake news and i hope it's not true i hope to god it's not true i should look at this now but i had read something where he might have to have his [ __ ] amputated because he has um diabetes so he has like some complication with the wound hold on let me look this up and let me fact check this real quick boosie amputation i just i just did the kid cudi i just did the kid cudi what bro okay all right no no no amputation needed no invitation needed that's good all right and this is a week after king vaughan died dude so i read this tweet someone said rap is becoming an extreme sport and it's [ __ ] sad wow dude no king vong gets shot some days later did you ever hear that rapper remote 3 no um i remember i remember cmo3 like way back on like say cheese tv and i don't know why i like i'd kind of check in on his music i wasn't like an avid fan or anything but um i i don't know why his name just like stuck with me like he's just it just has a name i i would just remember like i would just wake up some days and go i wonder what moe 3's up to like i don't know this guy at all okay dude he so he got shot in like the worst way possible he like went over some girl's house and then he woke up the next morning and he went to get gas and he like noticed a car tailing him so he goes on the freeway and he sees his car still following him he hits traffic so he exits his car and takes off on foot because he's like these dudes are after me and the dudes pop out the car and they [ __ ] chase him down and they gun him down why i don't i don't know the details did he die oh yeah yeah oh so him king vaughn benny gets shot in the leg and then boosie got shot as well man that's like crazy ah it's like come on man yeah and i think vaughn is it's especially sad because he was only like what like 26 yeah something like that but i feel like he just had wasn't he like coming the [ __ ] up too yeah and and it's especially like i you know i think it's really sad for him because his style of of like rapping and like storytelling is that's a hard style i feel like in modern rap to get to get through to the mainstream i feel like the mainstream is not really into that right yeah yeah so for him to be really blowing up off of doing that that's like that was like special and then yeah that [ __ ] got taken away you're like god damn yeah so it's just it's it's sad but you know when i said i did the kid cudi kid cudi was high as hell with selena gomez on like facebook live and what did he do i like it's not it's like everyone like was like meaning him and saying like if there this video like this section of their live is the definition of like scaring the hoes like he what did he do dude it's it's not fair because basically they're live and he's like you could tell they're high as [ __ ] and he's just like standing with his hands at his side which is already like hold on yeah yeah but wait wait was it were they in the same room together yeah yeah yeah yeah oh they were they he wasn't like on in the other frame no no no no no okay so they're in the same room and he's just kind of standing off to the side of the camera and his hand is like at his side which is in my opinion you have to be in a specific kind of mental state to be standing with your hands next to your pockets yeah okay like when's the last time you stood like that that's [ __ ] weird like like it's like you're it's like you're having to hold yourself well no no no they're not like pinned like they're just hanging like he's just like oh like straight like this yeah just yeah like that okay and she brings up something about like facebook live like oh she's like oh we could go on facebook live or i wonder if my facebook live works there's i don't know and kid cody goes oh damn do you remember that lady who got shot on facebook live and it's just it's just so out of nowhere it's so dark and like the context was i guess it was like like a police when was this uh pretty recently it was like a and dude he's like he's just so faded that like he's it was just something that popped up in his head and he's just like okay let's see if i can hold on if i share my screen i think it'll actually work ah no god man you don't want to watch it no you can't i just feel guilty like doing this because like what he's bringing up is legitimate but i don't um oh this is 13 minutes no no go to the top comment i bet you it's the time stamp i bet you it's the time stamp top comment seven minutes yeah seven up that's what you want right there i can't hear it but oh my god i really hope that recorded i don't know how zoom recording works i really hope that works just pause it just pause it so nate can can can beat match it but dude that's that's the bit that's the bit that's like what what yeah that's the bit like from like four episodes ago and we were joking about like just saying something abruptly dark as hell like yeah you know yeah yeah yeah i just i just did that like four times in a row i was like oh i'm really glad we waited to the second half because four people got critically injured yeah yeah yeah yeah and then this other dude brings the [ __ ] story the same way it's like do you ever think about like chick-fil-a probably giving us stomach cancer yeah oh yeah okay yeah for sure you ever think about how like processed meat you know is definitely killing all of us yeah do you ever think about how much contact you've actually probably had with asbestos yeah oh fun fact there is something with asbestos in our house perfect that's awesome yeah that'll go great with all the microplastics in the universe right now and the ecosystem and the [ __ ] wait do you actually have asbestos in your place there's a there's like a there's a old water line that has it in it you can leave it but you can pay a company to come remove it and they show up and like do that they stay safe suits and they knock it out i watched the ahri's video that we're in aries whatever yeah i don't know why i was like i want to watch that again memory lane lately nice i've been i've been taking trips man i uh i wonder how much i feel i feel like there was some like mold or something in my last place uh-huh oh feeling a lot better yeah maybe maybe something like that physically i don't know why i feel like a little bit better you turn it into mark ruffalo from yeah black water or dark waters or whatever ever since we moved away from that black swamp yeah that we live beside ever since we moved away from that chemical plant for some reason it's the chemical plant and so much better dude everyone it's god damn it man i feel for kid cudi i'm just still thinking about that because that's something i would do like to be high as hell and then something happens on tv and i say oh you have you seen that lively video where that person gets killed by a brick everyone's like what this is like a tiny home video what are you what are you talking about well you're like there's bricks right there they're using bricks dude and then he starts giving all this context because he's so faded and it just gets darker and darker and darker and you're like oh no wait just just on the chance that this actually records i'm seeing everything he said and everyone saw the whole thing on facetime live [ __ ] yeah facetime live hold on one second i'd like to take this time to let all the listeners know that i've closed two out of my three rings today you did what i closed two out of my three rings which two which two um my move goal and my standing goal you got the calories without the exercise yeah you barn dog yeah so was it in how was today did it go well you know what man yes in in a way that i definitely would not have expected um yeah i'm stoked how many people did you shoot with four okay nice yeah it was uh it was a good time and when's that going up i'm trying to get the first one up like next week when's our [ __ ] go up tomorrow tomorrow yeah yeah yeah oh yeah we can finally talk about that yeah yeah that was a lot of fun dude the thumbnail was so funny yeah the thumbnail kills bro uh we we talked about that though we talked about it didn't we like making the or did we not did we i don't think we did oh well ladies and gentlemen we have a video coming out tomorrow cody and i simulate drunk baking and we are confident that you will enjoy it it was really fun and uh it actually turned out really funny also cash is editing very very good yeah oh man he's gotten so sharp yeah but you know really good this full works for too many people now so does he really yeah he's like he's working for a lot of people you know he's like doing stuff for converse and [ __ ] so it's not like the back in the day we're like yo can you cut this and he's like yeah sure he's like oh he's gonna i gotta see what i'm getting let me see if i can pencil you in yeah and talk to my secretary see if see if there's some room to get you uh to get you uh see if we got wiggle room in the next two months yeah i'm booked for the next year you know dude i actually while we were making that i got the same feels as a cringe it was that same level of like [ __ ] around yeah i got that same vibe i agree i agree it was a lot of fun and i feel like um i don't wanna yeah i don't want to say what i'm going to say i don't i don't want to reveal too much honestly yeah you guys should watch it the next one if we end up doing what we have planned for the next one i think that's it's good anyhow bro traffic let's talk about it so this um this i'm done after this like this is my week tomorrow yeah tomorrow i'm off and it's basically my birthday weekend so yeah what are you gonna do what are you gonna do what are you doing what are you doing we rented a house in san diego because the surf is gonna be really good and i just wanna surf i just wanna surf all weekend that's all i wanna do and uh yeah so i might go down to huntington beach tomorrow to surf and then drive back up and then drive to san diego later nice is surfing like hella packed right now or people pretty no i've been fine i mean not not like in orange county and i'm sure it is if you go to like like san clemente and whatever but huntington beach isn't that bad it breaks like all the way down the beach and the beach is [ __ ] huge so so you just have your own little space yeah you know i did not realize how nice um san clemente is it's a beautiful little town isn't it it's crazy yeah i don't even know if it's a town i've just seen like the this the part between peace or the part like just on we went to like a bar there one time or something like that yeah and it was awesome yeah we uh that's where i went to go um check out the race car that never was oh yeah okay i think i'm gonna try to do that next year same event i'm gonna try to do it yeah yeah it's gonna be um it's 24 hours of lemons that's what it was gonna be what oh i never told you about this maybe i don't know dude so it's a it's a super it's actually a super interesting thing people go every year and people try to make documentaries out of it and [ __ ] and i think that's cool because i feel like not enough people know about it but basically it's a parody of the 24 hour of le mans so uh the budget cap on your car is 500 okay and if you if your car is worth more than that you have to grease the judges somehow but it can't be money so you know they put like in their rules like we like liquor so if you want to do that like oh that's hilarious yeah and like your your team has to have a theme and you know so people do hilarious [ __ ] like that you know they'll turn their cars into all kinds of stuff like [ __ ] that's hilarious yeah the stuff people fab on their cars is insane it reminds me of those red bull events the ones where they try to fly yeah yeah what's that flute and tag or something like that yeah yeah god that [ __ ] is so funny yeah it's completely it's like that and so um there's so many wild stories of dudes doing that event like one guy had been doing it long enough that he figured out kind of one of the judges just he figured out that one of those judges was building an old porsche or wanted an old porsche okay so he greased the judge by bringing him like a part for that car and he was like oh [ __ ] okay all right and then he like figured out other things like uh so a key element to the race is that if you get flagged for some reason they'll punish you but the punishments are supposed to be funny okay so sometimes they'll make you give your car a wash and then they'll see if you cleaned it good okay and then you can go back out on track so you were gonna buy a car and be in this race yeah so it was supposed to be me and a couple of pro drivers and like the whole theme of our thing was gonna be like like double agent type [ __ ] okay and um like i i still want to do it because and i want to document the whole thing because like in what little bit of the surface i scratch that thing is such a cult like the guy we're buying the car from he's like i've done five here's what you need to know like it's this very like inside baseball kind of thing and you're yeah it just make a great video yeah yeah it definitely would be interesting so i think for next year i want to take my civic i want to gut it and then use that for the race that's awesome yeah something like that because the my civic has like a cracked head gasket so you know um why not just [ __ ] whatever uh trash it in a race so you think it's worth under 500 bucks um yeah i can't believe you still have it dude i'm just like i never let it go so it's too late to let it go got to make it work but yeah the car we were going to get it was it was um it was a it was a ford focus and had like a full like six point cage and um it was like it was it was gonna be for real i started getting nervous because the dude says all right man um as you can see here's your gauges cage is welded by these guys i know blah blah blah and he's like um and this right here is for your cool suit i'm like huh he's like cool suit you know like in case the [ __ ] car starts on fire yes you're like oh what's up yeah and he's like he's like so you know um if anything were to happen you just pull this lever right here and this will extinguish the entire inside and yeah you're good to go so i'm like oh [ __ ] i didn't even think you know this isn't like a video game yeah yeah this is real life so then i did the worst thing and i looked up 24 hours of lemons crashes oh no and there really aren't that many but there's this insanely scary one see i'm doing it again i'm doing the kid cuddy again yeah yeah yeah where this guy got stomach cancer six months before the race and he couldn't do it and he died bro he is going down a straight and it's like towards the beginning of the race so that there's so much traffic and it was something like his steering column broke or something so or no no his brakes cut out so he he runs off into the grass trying to slow the car down and dude he he like does like a cartoon maneuver where he because it's they're coming up to a turn so all the cars are turning and he just pat he just times it and passes in front and behind like perfectly between cars and he runs right into a wall and all the comments were getting in his ass like why would you go through people he's like dude i was gonna die like what my god do you want me to do but yeah it's a real [ __ ] race yeah yeah oh you better said you what is it called the 24 hours of lemons look that up after this we can go and you could just do one lap oh yeah you can you can oh this is sick ollie this is so funny i would love to buy like a beat up ass truck and do it yeah i mean let's dude let's just sponsor a tmg car and go do it yeah dude the [ __ ] one i was watching an old danny duncan video or maybe actually kind of new uh he buys a were they a rzr it's like one of those four-seater like giant like go-karts with the roll cage so you just take off like dirt jumps and stuff like that um what is that [ __ ] called a pull no oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah you know what i'm talking about yeah yeah yeah yeah yep polaris is that what it is yep yeah yeah one of these it's like an rv it's like um what's a [ __ ] word for it it's like an atv agv sort of it's like a beefed up atv yep he pays like 25 grand for it or something like that they say the price in the video because he's like haggling and then he goes back to his place and just ruins it on the day that he bought it unreal unreal nice i like to be nice man every time i'm worried about spending money i'm gonna watch this video well at least i didn't do that um all right sorry that this episode was so cursed yeah well we'll be back for a not cursed episode next week yeah next week will be less cursed and uh yeah sorry and next week hopefully carrington will be on it too so yeah that's the game plan it should all go over well we should be good yeah i gotta go feed my my boy all right make sure you you know take care of his skin take care of your reptile yeah i gotta go put cortisone on him yeah i was gonna say it but i left it alone all right you know what i got two shots of dupixen you could you could pick those up he loves that yeah take care of him man yeah all right guys we'll see you next week peace

Channel: Tiny Meat Gang

Views: 240,267

Rating: 4.9528961 out of 5

Keywords:

Id: Nj4iT85jGqY

Length: 69min 29sec (4169 seconds)

Published: Fri Nov 20 2020