CHATS #6

the police just showed up and took the dog what why unpaid parking tickets why did I marry you hey so I heard you like bad boys yeah and well not to brag but this morning I ate free gummy vitamins instead of two I'll see you at 6:00 bro I hate rats accidentally oh my god it will eat you up from inside don't worry I hate rat poison - these could be yours but you plan a sorry wrong number wait let's talk did we just become best friends want to come over sorry icon I have to go to church why don't you just skip it for once mom warned me about girls like you how does your girlfriend 41 ha ha ha she could be your mom yes but she is yours what a virgin hmm not anymore just ask your sister I don't even have a sister dump just wait 9 months pick me up I'm drunk okay semi a location I love that song hey Dad um I have some money for Coke sure is 60 enough daddy it's free 50 that's cheap loser dealer dad coca-cola Oh bad coke well this is awkward boy if you don't so how was your hinge date she got drunk and adopted a dog marry her immediately what Mouse walks on both legs I don't know why it's Mickey Mouse was that's supposed to be funny what duck walks on both legs Daffy all ducks dumbass [ __ ] you [ __ ] he has a little up dog on his shirt what's the shirts lid my balls be a little confused but you got the spirit hey you mentioned you like Ed Sheeran so I got you this new album Sainsbury's basics 15 cheesy singles I was your oppa driver like three months ago believe me the Freak alone hi Bonjour what Bonjour are you dumb it's French for hello dumbass let's speech 100 I'll be late for work today there is a cat on my car roof have to take the bus you can't just come in late because you don't want to bother a damn cat just get rid of it I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to what is more important your job or a damn animal uh yeah about that a sexy can I get your number sorry I don't need stupid guys I'm sorry babe I didn't know it you weren't feeling more grammatically correct gentlemen so could I possibly get your number now still stupid what how if you need my number then how are you texting me right now shaking my head truth or dare truth what's your phone number yeah I dare you to give me your phone number it's a simple spell but quite unbreakable that's a freaking owl outside our I will how wow how the Frick do you spell it hoot-hoot versa hoots are outside my window where are you I messed up okay how I went to India thought Indiana just tell me you don't love me what the hell Tom I have good news and bad news okay say the bad one first you're probably going to die I said the bad one first so why don't you have a boyfriend my parents aren't really cool with that yet what about you why don't you have a girlfriend because your parents aren't really cool Vidya oh my god mom I'm pregnant again must be something in the air yeah you're freaking legs um that's not nice bro find me a girlfriend post it on Facebook say whoever reacts hearts on this will be my girlfriend thanks oh there's already a heart react great who is that your girlfriend dude I gotta go me too bro nice where's she from she's from another nation which nation my imagination my girlfriend lives by the sea okay which see my fantasy they had us in the first half not gonna lie started my juice cleanse yesterday and also went for a hike bullish bits what did you really do drank free bottles of wine and fell down the stairs in case this guy gets a message from Lana Drori Hera bus oh god what is that name anyway she says quit laughing at all my pictures [ __ ] your name spells superhot anal backwards dad I think I might be gay I don't get it you think you might be gay you're unsure yeah silly what I'll send you some gay porn by email and we'll see if it does anything for you okay it does nothing so the sight of two grown men blowing each other and freaking up the ass doesn't arouse you dad normally it does but nobody see you and uncle Steve super smash bros Ultimates like this video and subscribe in the next five seconds or you will have 10 years of bad luck I really like you would you like to be my girlfriend ah I have a boyfriend with cancer and I'm really worried about him oh sorry I didn't know hmm is he dead now do you like cars yeah why check your kitchen what me and you should go to the world of coke together what it's the Museum of coke and you can try coke from all over the welds like Coke or or coke ah are you asking me if I'm talking about coke the drug or coke the drink yet yes why would there be a museum about cocaine and allow samples I'm talking about the soda dude did you flirt with my sister yes you want to freaking die kinda bro we talked about this come on Cavell ski analysis yo I totally failed that test um what damn that blows huzzah a man of quality Brian your next automated pizza delivery is scheduled for Saturday February 25th at 12 p.m. to confirm Tex yes to decline Tex no texthelp for help Thank You Barbra Jean you handsome man I shall call you the carbs vixen we're sorry we didn't understand please confirm or decline when I make love I imagine you tossing some dough shirtless dudes our automated system isn't sets up this is a real person takes to you I make minimum wage please just tell me if you want the pizza I wasn't that drunk I drove myself home dude don't even try denying it what I drove you home while you drove with a paper plate oh I thought that was a dream idiot son dad is in the hospital [ __ ] I can't see I'm complying holy [ __ ] message from mom make your bed mom why would I make my bed if I'm just gonna sleep in it again oh wow you're so right I know I am you should listen to me more let's have pizza for dinner tonight okay but why should I even feed you if I know you can't die anyways can I ask a question sure well I don't know I just have quick fingers I guess wait how do you reply so fast what the Frick mom can I go see my girlfriend nope but why jaws before [ __ ] mom dishes before [ __ ] mom while you like this cutting grass before getting ass I'm done dad am i adopted no why the Frick would I pick you hey bro yeah bro did you hear about Maya hey Maya who Maya ha ha why hey mom I got detention what what happens and you're grounded well when the teacher was standing in front of the chalkboard she asked all idiots to stand up okay so I stood up and said to her well I didn't want you to feel lonely you're ungrounded you just made my day and everyone else here at work too baby are you cheating on me with that Jessica no baby I'm cheating that is Jessica with you I love you so much baby ah baby I love you too illusion 100 Restoration 100 speech 100 sneak 100 hey I like this girl but I'm kind of nervous to ask her out just do it I'll bet you ten dollars she'll say yes okay you want to go out with me no sorry not my type right you owe me ten dollars yo my pet dog just died what mmm holy spit that sucks man gonna do a murder on Friday the 13th you want in for the last time I'm Michael Myers the Halloween killer you want Jason voice he's the Friday 13th guy wait um what's the difference I've got a face mask and a knife he's got a hockey mask and a machete so Blaine sighs is the main difference I go to whip out a tape measure when I want to tell you apart it's not that difficult I might Myers quite straightforward really okay okay I got it loved you in Austin Powers by the way hey want to hear a joke yeah sure [ __ ] I don't get it I know ha ha ha you got me but guess what I do have Joe who's Joe and I sit this episode of chats I really hope you didn't enjoy and if you did be sure to jump into the series playlist and check out the other episodes I hope you'll have an absolutely amazing day and I'll see you on the next one much love peace

Channel: Fainted

Views: 6,027,719

Rating: 4.9383674 out of 5

Keywords: chats, texts, funny texts, funny chats, facebook, twitter, instagram, social media, funniest texts ever, funniest texts, meme, memes, fainted

Id: N4LfLRjZW68

Length: 12min 5sec (725 seconds)

Published: Fri Nov 15 2019