CHATS #10

you dare to leave without giving me kissies you're cute I am a man really hello number neighbor you just texted my dead wife's phone let's play 8-ball why are you still selling that truck yes can you send the picture of the truck dumbass oh sorry dude my phone rang during the funeral so my ringtone is hi wait the hell for my CD spaghetti carbonara but Cobb banana ah never text me again I am here for you Thanks I'm going for a tough time so it means a lot and sorry I lost my contacts who is this this is your uber driver I'm here to pick you up oh dude I just found out that my girlfriend seeing someone else I don't know who though what it's a me message from eggs hey she my new boyfriend he is world from me but this is your fourth world in two months are you building a solar system that's a [ __ ] dude message from Josh hey sexy this is Anna I'm pretty sure it's meant for Kelly you know Kelly your girlfriend nope it was meant for you well that changes things doesn't it I won't tell if you don't tell I didn't have to tell Kelly is reading this over my shoulder hey Dad I got the job what oh we cal that's out of this world never mind right do you know Newton's second law I'm a science student bro not a law student gathered concern you know what else stimulates the brain No please inform me the cult 47 pointed at the back of your skull oh sheesh wait that's just my hamster no need to worry he doesn't even know how to our daughter lost her first tooth I know she won't touch my PlayStation again what what IP birthday baby oh thank you sweetheart what did you get me it was supposed to be a surprise but you remember that pink Mercedes that you wanted so badly oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god yes yes yes yes I'm screaming no oh my god well I got you a toothbrush in the same color oh hey don't leave your birth-control out what cough dad you'd have to worry about getting girls pregnant when you got a collection like this roasted by dad hey dad do you believe in ghosts there's no such thing as ghosts but our mate says there's ghosts pack your bags maybe on the car now mmm why we don't have a maid what would you do if we were together right now eat mugs obviously and then eat the fries it's a whole meal Quin then what will you eat well that depends if I got the apples with my happy meal apples oh come on he is a man of focus commitment and sheer frickin will message to dad could you pick me up why what happened the teacher points to me of the ruler and said at the end of this rule ax is an idiot and I asked which end so I got suspended haha you are awesome you're not even grounded nose I type nose with my nose law parts John you're gay Oh No hey bro you go cheating jasmine or Maria Maria Maria hates you Maria a Maria see the one with without glasses with with without braces without them maybe this is why I can't get a girlfriend this guy's just keeping them all to himself message from therapist just exactly how big is your drug problem oh my why are the cups and dishes in your room they belong in the kitchen ha just like a woman a woman is more likely to be in kitchen than in your bedroom [Music] hmm I've seen this before death imagine breaking a magician and he nuts in you you freak out but then he says psych British check your ear you want to see my balls you know what the Frick you want to see my [ __ ] let me guess you're going to send me a chicken I heard mom got stung by a few bees this morning is she okay hospital she's okay now no hospital she had to take the deep peepee uh what I had to inject it with an epic pee pee Oh for Christ's sake EpiPen well they had you really give enough like mixed signals right now dude what's going on I'm going to a party will you be drinking now will you be doing drugs no will you be having sex no then why the Frick are you going hey what's your address one seven three point one six eight point one five point 10 no man your local address 127 point zero point zero point one oh you geeky nerd I mean your physical address twenty-nine : Oh 138 6241 58 Oh computer engineers be like hey mom can I borrow $50 no do you think that money grows on trees what is money made of paper what is paper made from yeah mom you just got outplayed rekt I don't know why it's kids trying to act like the smart guy though bro you're asking your momma for 50 bucks get a real kid hello my beautiful son just wondering did you eat my hummus as it seems to have disappeared and I was so looking forward to it maybe [ __ ] I love you I love you too something wrong with your spacebar no there's just no space for me to love anyone else it's too bro I'm typing with a slim jim right now and it totally works that's it I'm done I swear to god I'm done you're an immature child grow up I've been thinking about dating other guys when quarantine is over don't expect to see me ever again but I can be mature I'm typing with her slender James right now message from dad you look guilty did you eat mom's coochie you definitely not her chocolate coochie dad mom's white her chocolate cookie don't be a wiseass Sean no I didn't eat her chocolate cookie J hey what do you want for dinner I'll tell you what I want what I really really want so tell me what you want what you really really want oh my god you were so cool mom could we have burritos sure message from dad son I am marrying June you're going to have a stepmom that's awesome aren't you angry always wanted a stepmom look busty Stefan and son sweet mom shared bed with horny step mug Oh God hey you took my daughter's virginity sorry sir it won't happen again literally my friends dog was rushed to the emergency vet and I'm currently cheering him up oh I'm sorry now don't worry about it it's okay you know dog is God backwards you'll be gone fine shoot not what I meant to say oh my freaking gosh I can't I didn't mean it that's the two ways it could go though I'm dying yeah I guess you're right that's hilarious it is but I swear I didn't mean it you wake this is his mother he is grounded until further notice no phone no Xbox oh okay most lame you know yes sir I have des you too anyways that is it this episode of chats really hope you guys did enjoy and see you on the next one that's the amazing day much love peace [Music] [Music]

Channel: Fainted

Views: 1,027,756

Rating: 4.9583797 out of 5

Keywords: chats, texts, funny texts, funny chats, facebook, twitter, instagram, social media, funniest texts ever, funniest texts, meme, memes, fainted

Id: uvXqZPANgq8

Length: 10min 15sec (615 seconds)

Published: Tue May 26 2020