What Is Your Worst Pick Up Story?

a total creeper hit on me at the pool I'm nine months pregnant what are some of the best worst pick-up stories you have gave a speech for a class once and after my speech ended I went to take a pee and get a drink on the way back to class a cute Asian from the class was in the hall looking like she was waiting for someone I assumed her boyfriend since he was also in the class with us she saw me and lit up asked if I wanted to join her for a sake I don't smoke that I obliged to keep her company since other people's speeches suck and we headed outside we joked around a bit she tried flirting but I have a GF and I didn't reciprocate but figured she was just a bubble a person right when we're about to head back she hands me a slip of paper with her number and says you should give me a call later today we can get high and get to know each other better I asked her about her boyfriend and she says he's working later I of course politely declined went back to class and spent the rest of the day wondering why the P script scenarios always happened when I am in a happy committed relationship but never when I am single when we got back to class she gave her bf a peck on the cheek and sat back down next to him you tend to seem happier and more approachable in general when you're in a good relationship I've rarely been hit on when I'm single but as soon as I'm with someone and we're doing well the flirting begins I was walking down the street in the middle of December hands stuffed in my pea coat walking behind a young man who looks pretty paranoid he finally stops and asks do do you have a gun I pull my hands out of my pocket and shrug no no gun oh do you have any weed nope dude sorry oh do you have a boyfriend priorities man priorities I was walking down a street in Berkeley often lined with older homeless guys and panhandlers it was a warm day so I was wearing a cute bit modest black and white polka-dot fifties style dress that always got me a lot of attention from the men anyways walking by two older guys sitting on the sidewalk near each other but far away enough to not encroach on each other's change seeking turfs when the one I pass hollers something to the effect of hey girl let me see that dress on my bedroom floor ironic because you know to which the second homeless guy responds without missing a beat hey don't you talk to my wife that way she's a lady TL DR random Berkeley bum defended my honor adorable until he follows you home and asks you what's for dinner I was really hoping his pickup line would be room for one more try it post four results Godspeed I was arrested in highschool for a spontaneous bout of stupidity and as I got into the cop car I realized that there was a teenager doing a ride-along with the cop I didn't think much of it seeing as that I was you know pretty busy focusing on how much trouble I was going to be in a few days later as I settled into my permanent grounding I got on Facebook lo and behold I have a Facebook message the boy doing the ride-along with the cop had written down my contact information and found me on Facebook just so that he could send me hey girl I just wanted you to know that I hated arresting a woman as beautiful as you I was walking down the street with my mother as it was summertime I was in shorts and platform sandals which were in fashion at the time I walked by two guys one of them starts telling them he loves me and he wants to go out with me my mom asked him if he was crazy to which he replied I'm crazy for her I was nine twists the guys were 10 and they were all playing family on the playground I was hanging out with a friend the day before Easter she had to drop by another friend's house for a quick errand so I went with her they had an Easter party going on for this woman's children and a few of their friends the parents were having a barbecue when the kids had done an Easter egg hunt and moved on to painting pictures for their parents a normal enough fellow started chatting with me and after about 10 minutes with the group I realized he was there with his two-year-old and the baby's mom I wasn't sure if they were together but I just assumed there were and left it at that so when we went to leave I was totally taken aback when he pulled me from the doorway where everyone was saying goodbye to each other he shook my hand whispered sh hhhh it was so great to meet you sh hhhh he put his finger to his lips wince then turned me back around to face the group i just stumbled through my normal goodbyes and left without acknowledging him while walking away i unfolded what he slipped me while shaking my hand it was his number and a note that said you are code text me torn from a large chunk of the easter painting his child had proudly handed him 10 minutes before TL DR father of the year destroys his child's masterpiece to hit on me in broken english in front of his baby mama I think I would walk straight to the mother and say your husband gave me this and leave walking down the Main Street of a medium-sized town with my girlfriend and her sister alright looking guy nor right looking car maybe about 22 - 25 pulls up and shouts to the sister hey you in the blue come get in the car go with me she shrugs walks over talks to him for a few seconds gets in the car they were married four months later last I heard it was still going strong but that's been a while ride with me for my pleasure my parents were walking through Target when this stumpy guy walks up to my mom he says sugar zero sugar zero sugar zero mum laughs and asks him what he means the guy goes if anybody asks you can tell them that I whispered sweet nothings to you my dad was laughing too hard to care TL DR mum got told sweet nothings by a gnome tyrion got mad games son I have very very long hair it reaches below my knees if it helps visualize I'm a slim asian female damn girl your hair be crazy like a [ __ ] horse tail hey you should know I'm a total stallion babe this guy leans in really close and starts stroking it I get the Frick out of there as fast as possible he calls after me in a gruff plead or come on go lem see if all yellow hair be long beautiful I briskly walk away not before I hear him turn back towards a buddy and sway he thinks I've got too crazy long Bush I've also had a dude just grab a boob out of nowhere I punched him on the air the back of your head is ridiculous I get a new job teaching computer courses to adult classes of adult learners I go to check out an apartment I found on Craigslist near my new job the renter and I exchanged some emails I tell her about my job she tells me about the nutrition supplements she sells she also tells me entirely too much about her life her ex-husband and her custody battle over her 13 year old son or boundary issues but I respond very sympathetically towards her because I'm a people pleaser with my own boundary issues we hit it off the address is a house and I figure it must be a duplex of some sort the renter invites me in she's a 40-something woman fairly attractive and I'm in my early 20s at the time she introduces me to her son who's in the living room playing guitar hero then she shows me the room which is just off the living room separated by a curtain I tell her I am surprised I thought she'd listed an apartment no she explains it's just the room but it comes furnished with a dresser and this waterbed don't worry about the curtain she says you'll have plenty of privacy you just need to turn this fan on she turns the fan on she sits on the bed and asks me a fire like waterbirds I tell her I've never been on one she invites me on the bed with her I demure she cajoles she promises me it'll be fun I don't get hit on much I'm a good-looking guy and quiet and I'm just not used to having signals sent my way but at this point I put it together that she is inviting me to engage in physical shenanigans while her son is 15 feet away on the other side of a curtain little dr stephen poop was aroused despite my common sense but common sense won the day i get out of there as politely as possible tell her i have to think the room situation over epilogue the next week guess who shows up at my level i windows vista class and guess who pretended he'd never seen her before his life this guy I like how you have to specify that the adult classes were for adults I was waiting for the last train from Paris to go back to my good old suburbs so this is right after midnight the station is quite empty only a few people left around should probably mention I'm a girl and alone anyway I have about 15 minutes left to wait and this old guy just comes and sits next to me after a few minutes he gets the courage to ask me could I ask you a favor sure oh no never mind it's okay he looks really sad and miserable about something so I try and be nice and I insist thinking he's just going to want to talk about something I could I see you feet excuse me I think you have beautiful feet could I just see them I won't touch or anything I just want to look you can keep your socks on if you want at that point I'm quite weirded out I was wearing some converse and this guy is making me feel bad for telling him I don't want to show him my feet he kept insisting with this miserable look on his face he even suggested to get on the next train and if there's too many people I don't have to if I'm being Shia something I actually felt like I had to apologize to him because I didn't want to show him my feet TL DR I apologized to a creeper who wanted to see my feet bone a story same night got off the train and walking towards my dad's car waiting for me other car drops their window and someone mumbles at me hey what's your name at which I'm too tired to think and mechanically reply like they're asking something from me sorry I don't have a name felt embarrassed at the time about being so dumb it turns out it's quite a funny way to get rid of weirdos d I love that this had a bonus story after the credits like a freakin Marvel movie also creepy so I witness it's at a bar one night this was at a college bar in California anyways this young couple were sitting together at the table next to mine and it was apparent they were dating holding hands smiling at each other constantly etc and were minding their own business when out of nowhere a guy in his early twenties and clearly a bit drunk walks up to their table and looks at the girl and looks at the girl and looks at the girl and looks at the girl and looks at the girl and looks at the girl and looks at the girl well hearing this I look over at the boy friend and he has this look on his face that just screams what the frick so his how the rest of the conversation goes boyfriend she's my girlfriend man so yeah my mind guy you're dating your sister isn't that illegal B no she's not my sister clearly agitated she's my girlfriend G oh so she was your sister and now she's your girlfriend B no leave us alone kid at this point the drunk guide turns around and yells for his friend to come over G hey guy to come over here this guy is dating his sister so next thing I know this well-groomed dressed guy clearly gay comes over to the table to see what kind of trouble his buddy is getting into guy he's dating his freaking sister guy-to-guy - isn't that illegal guy that's what I said well now the couple are pretty pay off and the girl suggests to her boyfriend that they go somewhere else as they gather their things and staff to walk away the second guy walks up to the girl and says hey would you mind if I talk to your brother and this look of horror spreads across her face as she realizes this gay guy wants to talk to her man the couple basically ran out of the bar and the two guys busted up laughing from the reaction they got TL DR mind if I talk to your sister I'm trying to figure out which one was the wingman I was in the backseat of my friend's truck with a girl I just met riding home one day I make small talk maybe two minutes off pleasantries are exchanged throughout the ordeal I am totally enthusiastic and just the embodiment of suave I asked her do you have a boyfriend number do you want one laughter oh you're serious yeah babe sure I will never be that cool again keep in mind I'm normally fairly shy around new people TL DR I felt like Fabio my mom was working at her pharmacy job at the pick up counter when a man came up to her and gave her a pick-up line something along the lines of hey I'm not here to pick up medicine I'm here to pick you up that man is my father that's fantastically lame there used to be this veteran who went to my college and always wore his uniform and he used to hit on me in the creepiest ways until I reported his but it started off as just friendly banter every once in a while until one night he has me cornered alone in the bus shelter I bet you taste good little princess like cotton candy I walk down to the next stop my reaction play AG e w w upvote blerg etc I was riding my bike and got hit by a car the guy stopped and we exchanged information I get a call later and it's him asking me if I was alright which I thought was normal and nice of him but then he follows up with if I would want to get lunch with him he then proceeded to call me every day leaving message like wanna get lunch I'm really hungry you don't break a person's tailbone then ask them out I usually buy them dinner before breaking their tail bones when I'm drunk I always seem to want to hit on lesbians I always have a very good time with it too and I've gotten a few numbers but it's not like I was trying to convert them or something so I always wake up the next morning wondering what the Frick I was trying to pull and made a few good friends that way though haha I tend to hit on lesbians when drunk too only that usually ends up going a completely different direction my girlfriend and I were walking along the beach in SD last year an older gentleman probably late 50s or so came up to me and said son if I had your body and my money I'd be unstoppable how about we put the two of them together my girlfriend just about fell over laughing while I tried to politely decline as we walked away he let me know you're even more fine watching from behind still haven't lived that one down this is a gem I'm happy I read this far down P I was walking back to my car one night and a group of young guys were hanging out on the sidewalk taking up most of the width of it my friend and I had to walk through their group as we walked though a guy stepped in really close to me and whispered go I'll buy you Starbucks every night I had no idea how to respond so I just smiled and kept walking but later I had to wonder do non-white men think the way to a preppy ish looking white woman's heart is the promise of daily Starbucks runs because well he's kind of right I guess I just like to tell you I'm using this tomorrow I'll return with results Opie delivers just used this on a girl from work she said but I didn't drink coffee I reply then I'll buy you a beer I don't drink beer either you know that so I reply then I'll buy you whatever fruity drink you want as long as it has a fun name long story short I have a date tonight this isn't mine as I've never been hit on but when I was going to college I was sitting in the cafeteria with a group of like 11 people who all knew each other and were D&D nerds together there were about four very attractive girls in this group one kind of sweat smelling mouth breathing newish guy who had only recently joined our little group leans over to one of the girls in the group brags about how he can do a perfect Zapp Branigan impersonation she asks to see and he goes if I said you had a beautiful body would you take your pants off and dance around a little in zips voice we laugh in that awkward not sure if rapists way I have to leave for class the next day he gets to the table before the girl from the early Edom's strikes a heroic pose and says Kip I have made it with a woman inform the men the girl is mortified that he not only told everyone but told everyone in Zapp Brannigan's voice fortunately he had the good sense to be too embarrassed to show his face again after that TL DR Zapp Brannigan's pickuplines apparently work till that I'm not the only person that would fall for a Zapp Branigan pick-up line buying condoms at a gas station late at night seventeen-year-old girl should do or anyone for that matter I paid and as I reached for the box the old Indian cashier grabbed my wrist and said take me with you it was so creepy I'll never forget the desperate look on his face freakin chills I was at a beach with three other friends it was a weekday so there wasn't a crowd but a bearable amount of people to handle we were enjoying ourselves and my friend and I were just floating about and talking when I then noticed this tan guy not too far away from us he was staring straight at us with an extremely creepy and perverted grin we decided to swim back to shore and started to take pictures and guess who decides to come along creepy tanned guy at this point we still really haven't reacted but then he starts running back and forth on the beach never taking his eyes away from me and my group he eventually starts doing his little running routine closer and closer to us when we thought it couldn't get weirder than that it did every time he ran towards us he slowed down IDUs up and down then smiled his creepy smile and began chanting he was chanting actual gibberish no English words or any language you'd recognize it was like he was performing a freaking ritual on us it was creepy as heck TL DR creepy duck tan guy tried to hit on me and my friends using some mystic ritual at the beach I bet he was charming while I was in Korea the local top prostitute 50-year old woman that looked like she transmitted herpes through the air asked my friend if he wanted a massage he politely declined and then she turned her sights on me and asked the same I was slightly drunk and instead of just saying no I exclaimed freak number she then proceeded to give me a nasty look and kicked me in the shin it's a proud moment when you can say you've been kicked by songs and Sally anybody that's been to those and will know who I am talking about I take it no one's been TASM I was working at a restaurant in my hometown and a guy walked by and gave me the double take but he came back a few minutes later to talk to me I had recognized him right away I had a serious crush on him back in middle school he was a few grades above me so of course he never spoke to me and I was also quite the ugly duckling as he started to flirt with me I realized that he didn't recognize me and it made me laugh he had to explain why I was laughing and he got kind of embarrassed he left me his number and walked by the restaurant a few more times to smile at me it made me realize how far I've come and was a huge ego boost I had a similar experience with a really hot guy in high school didn't have the time of day for me then four years later he was following me around at a party I was amused and didn't hook up with him bleurgh I'll go into lengths if any interest took reddit advice bought guy a drink got laughed at and drink poured into potted plant went home crying okay okay since there is some interest I'll fill in the blanks I don't often go out let alone to bars I'm not a drinker but I decided to humor my boredom and go out by myself I put on a nice flora spring filled dress and hit the town I'm at the bar sipping away at whatever I had bought that night when I spot a cute guy sitting at a table drinking with two other guys he's laughing having fun and his smile is attractive now I am not the type to approach at all crap I haven't even had a boyfriend out of school that one time I'm pretty dang quiet and shy tend to avoid these kinds of situations all together but this night I had seemed to have both still my courage that I had stored over the last 21 years for one single move I was going to buy that nice smiling mother a drink I knew a large percentage of guys liked this maneuver thanks to read it I would simply ask the bartender if she knew what the guy was drinking and if so if she could make another for him deliver it and I'll cover it I thought it was perfect it wasn't pushy in his face flirting if he wasn't interested no big deal he didn't have to approach me engage in conversation or heck even thank me I didn't think anything could go wrong big frickin mistake bartender escorts that drink over to the table guy seems curious butterflies start vomiting in my stomach he inquires and she mentions to me I offer a friendly smile and a wave they all laugh him his mates laugh at me and not a nice laugh not a row hey you just got picked up by a chick ha ha that's it bro you got swagger no it was holy crap he got picked up by a fat flick you must be a pig magnet sucks to be you laughs one of his mates slap him on the shoulder and that's where he does it he raises the drink I brought him in a toast then dumps it out behind him into the potted plant and here is the part of the story where I wish I could say I stormed over there and slapped him I wish I could say I tipped my own drink on him crap I wish I could say Batman swooped out of the dark corner of the bar and punched him in the nuts however I cannot I simply turned around immediately and left feeling the most ashamed humiliated embarrassed fat ugly worthless downtrodden I ever had at least I made it out the door before the crying started I haven't been to a bar since should have taken that plant home you already plied it with a drink now compliment it spot I was 17 and in charge of supervising the installation of carpeting in our new apartment alone my mom was home packing this should be an easy task all I had to do was wonder in every couple hours to see how he was going and the rest of the time I could go for a walk or hang out outside the installers with two guys maybe in their 30s seemed nice enough to begin with I introduced myself and explained I'd be around the building if needed for any issues it became rather apparent that one of the two was being a little too nice but I just shrugged him off I was used to it because I looked older than I was and got hit on by older guys on occasion the problem is that he didn't stop and there was a major storm so I was stuck in the building every time I was around he tried to make small talk he'd asked things about me and what I liked and talked about himself a bit he started to flatter me and be rather openly flirt I tried to be polite and make it clear I wasn't entrusted eventually he started asking me out on dates and offered me his number I kept declining but he didn't stop to try and hammer in my point I casually worked my age into a conversation to my dismay his response was to flatter me more and tell me that I could always call him when I turned 18 and he'd show me a good time I think there was some insinuation about it being an adult good time but I can't remember the wording his partner looked thoroughly embarrassed and kept trying to avoid eye contact between sneaking rather disgusted looks towards the guy it was incredibly awkward and I didn't feel very comfortable because he refused to take no as an answer at one point I got stuck in the dang elevator with him and he accidentally hit the wrong buttons then hinted at how nice it was being stuck with me alone gave me the total creeps the day ended with him giving me the company card in case there were any problems then winking at me and telling me to call him soon his cell number was on the back in hindsight I should have complained to the company itself because it really really disturbed me I wish I had TL DR creepy carpet installer who was twice my age wouldn't take no for an answer and kept hitting on me all day when I was underage what are those mentioning the legal age of consent being 16 and some states I'm from Canada the legal age of consent is 18 here no matter what province you in by his response I'm pretty sure he was aware of it too it's 16 in Canada but there are some situations where it is still illegal under 18 and the law states the age gap can make a difference in this judgment I must have confused that a bit still though I was in Marrakech Morocco with my family for vacation a couple years back as I'm walking through the markets with my father one of the vendors stops us and whispers to me your fire hair is very beautiful I'm a redhead he then turns to my father and tells him I will give you 30 camels for her the worst part is that my father shrugged and said 40 and you have a deal thankfully the vendor understood that my father was joking verbal is binding she offered to give me a bj for a hamburger and she was seven months pregnant I wish I was lying my old roommate is a terrible person she was not my roommate I bought her the hamburger but didn't accept payments it's as far as I know my roommate did deployed and at the pool on base I always hung out with a large group of guys that I knew and trusted plus it helped keep away the creepers there were always a few guys that would do the whole sup girl looking good kinda thing and I would just laugh it off I wish that would have happened he was an older Army contractor that was in charge or had the ability to move choose our housing units that we lived in while deployed well some of them have a bathroom in them and are referred to as wear shoes this guy literally went on for a good 45 minutes about how he could get me a wet shoe and how wet he could get it all while eyeing me up and winking to put emphasis on the true meaning of his words so dang creepy every time one of my buddies would say something to him he would just say that he was trying to help me out I denied his advances and his offers multiple times and eventually he got the hint and left me alone I heard that he later got banned from the pool for making other women feel uncomfortable the real kicker is that he was married with three kids back in the States yuck my wife is in the military and it seems it the majority of guys in the military just hit on her regardless of the fact that er she's married and B they are also married it's like a compulsion it seems I was walking through a mall around my area wearing a tuffet some classy glasses a belt a fake handlebar moustache and well a Batman cape three girls ended up giving me their phone numbers and I have been in a relationship with one of them for about five months now I never understood that TL DR dressed in Tophet bowtie cape moustache and glasses walked in with class walked out with the Jets walked in with class walked out with butt family camping trip in the summer we pitch our attempts next to a small lazy river one of the days our I was waiting around in the clear water enjoying the Sun there is a group of men of the site next to us and a few of them were in the water away downstream a little later one of them came over and started politely chatting with me he said he'd lost his class ring and I believed him and helped him look for it after he started mentioned how attractive I was I noticed he wasn't looking very hard for his lost ring he thanks me for trying to help him and asks me if I'd like to come over to their site that night to drink beer and play poker with them I awkwardly say no later I had a bit of an identity crisis with my 16 year old self TL DR 30 ish man hits on teenage girl results in deep thoughts I walked into a movie theater and as I was walking by this gorgeous tall amazing brown-eyed guy says excuse me miss do you believe in love at first sight I look up and smile this guy was so hot it blew my mind that he was talking to me this was a first for me it was obvious his buddies put him up to it I decided that two could play this flirting game I smiled and said why yes yes I do then I walked off as I was opening the door into the theater I had this urge to continue so I turned around and said he could sit next to me if he wanted he was still standing there with a shocked look on his face probably thought he would get smacked for being that forward I turned to go into the theater and all I hear are pounding footsteps up behind me we sat together he ditched his friends to watch my movie with me five minutes later he asked me to run to Vegas and get married five months later we do we have been happily married for 22 years best pick-up line ever that's kinda awesome hello a friend of a friend came to a bar a bunch of my buds used to frequent and from the jet go it was obvious she wanted to leave with someone the problem is she was kind of a loud obnoxious whale with an extreme air of desperation about her and all the guys could smell it and stay far away myself I'm just there to drink good beer and hang out bill I'm apparently too nice and before I know it her sights are set on me whenever we're in proximity to each other she tries to talk to me touches me and laughs at every other word I utter at one point she hugs me and says my god you smell gorgeous and proceeds to continue to smell my neck for a few minutes as I semi resigned myself to be devoured by the mammoth beasts while I'm trying to desperately figure out a way to eject from this planner egg she says something like wow you're dressed so well are you trying to impress us ladies that catches me a few and so I pause and before I can say something she continues with or someone else other than ladies a question mark and a really playful tone before I know it my brain goes instantly into action I change my stance put all my weight on my back leg rest one arm on that hip stick my other hand out in a limp wrist and in the most stereotypically gay voice Yello you know IT Google whether she believes me or not the woman realizes what's just happened and stops all contact with me the rest of the night I don't know what happened but my friends still laugh about that to this day TL DR my brain uses Gaia's self-defense against unsavory women near closing time at a bar downtown a guy saw me and decided to open with what's your husband think of that I'm very eloquent at nearly 2:00 in the morning so I said what he responded with boyfriend I say I don't have a boyfriend the gentleman clearly drunker than I says wistfully I wish this was real I left then because I had to get a round off water for my friends but I wish I'd stayed and continued the conversation because we clearly had some chemistry none of this conversation makes any sense I've got a bad experience I'm at the Sears with my brother all I'm buying is a Perry the Platypus shirt go to the cashier it's a cute girl at the register she takes my shirt while she's scanning it she asks for my number I say um no thanks I thought she wanted for marketing signed me up for Sears card she looks a bit disappointed she rings up the shirt I pay I leave it wasn't till a few months later that I realized that she wanted my number to call me and hook up geez I realize I'm s ap looking back I know she wanted to hook up because she didn't do the marketing thing right and her co-worker giggled when I acted so awkward boner story I'm walking home from middle school out of Pei wearing axe I don't use that anymore and a random girl comes from behind me and says you smell good and and kept on walking while I look on and say oh okay then I've been in the opposite situation where I asked a customer for their phone number and they stared me down before going up no and then I realise how they took it and got all sad faced I was with my friends at Steak N Shake at 3 or 4 a.m. one night the waitress decided I didn't have to pay for my meal so all I got was a piece of paper with her phone number on it I'm the most Awkward person that has ever lived but I gathered my testicles and went to talk to her two minutes later she took the phone number from my hands and said have a nice night trick yet free meal no strings attached I hate how latino men say something along the lines of I can't help it I'm Latino I have passion in my blood makes me want to vomit all over him actually that's hemoglobin tangentially related a friend of mine missed a question on a health exam by saying the blood is full of horror goblins I was in line at Starbucks only one person in front of me and he's placing his order he finishes ordering his drink and said so now what the barista behind the counter said now this is the part where you'd give me money he calmly asked when is the part where you'd give me your phone number she responded with well this is the part where I introduced you to my husband he's standing behind you he looked over his shoulder and sheepishly said hi I said it happens to the best of us he stared at the ground the entire time waiting for his drink preemptively yes my wife was wearing her engagement ring and wedding band when I was 12 I was hanging out by myself in the CD section of Target this middle-aged dude came up behind me and told me I should model I didn't realize he was talking to me so he said it again when I didn't respond I noticed him looking me up and down and mumbled something under my breath and scurried off to find my mom we told security but as far as I know they never found the guy I'm a hospital chaplain and being with people in some of their most vulnerable moments can led to some pretty ridiculous encounters last year I was sitting with the family at the bedside of a rapidly dying elderly woman I had been speaking with the woman's spouse when his son walked in sat down and looked me straight in the eyes as he said is my dad flirting with you I bet he was flirting with you I have to say you're a very attractive woman and if it were me I know that I would be flirting with you one I'm the chaplain to the man's stepmother was dying three he accuses his father the spouse off said dying woman married for many years of flirting with me at his dying wife's bedside he went on several minutes later to tell me about his new bride who was still living in China and waiting to move to America I wish I was making this all up I would feel better about humanity if I were one time my friend and I were at a bar and would just sit and wait for a girl to walk by when one did we would say hi if they stopped we'd say hi do you know where my mom went in a child's voice one girl came over and straddled my leg and said aaww are you lost I seized up and don't remember anything else haven't had a girl hit on me ever okay you probably have been hit on just didn't notice at the time if you are new to the channel you can subscribe I publish new videos every day until then check another video [Music]

Channel: Updoot Studios

Views: 43,945

Rating: 4.8546042 out of 5

Keywords: creeper, creepy, creepiest, dating, dating stories, dating advice, date story, what not to do when asking a girl out, #updootst, updoot, updoot reddit, updoot everything, reddit on tap, toadfilms, pewdiepie, reddit, askreddit, funny reddit, reddit stories, top posts, reddit top posts, reddit cringe, comedy, reddit compilation, /r, r/, r/askreddit, top posts of r/, askreddit reading, best reddit posts, top posts of all time, people of reddit, askreddit question, ask reddit, subreddit, sub

Id: lm9_c_Jggn0

Length: 37min 19sec (2239 seconds)

Published: Mon May 11 2020