What is a funny thing to say to a surgeon before anesthesia?

like and subscribe right now or else this will be in your bed tonight our /oscar edit by planet reddit what would be a funny thing to say to a surgeon before anesthesia kicks in five seconds later the last time I tried to say something funny right before surgery they were about to put me out and I said go easy on me doc it's my first time I gave a little chuckle and so did the doctor he then picked up a scalpel and said don't worry it's my first time too and then I promptly blacked out I would give the doctor reddit gold for that one let the search commence I'm I'm the doctor yes your edit thanks for the gold everyone imagine my surprise when I got off work and checked my reddit I saw 80 unread messages and thought oh boy what did I do now right before I went under to have surgery on my septum I was about to stop counting backwards before they put the mask on does anyone need anything while I'm out the last thing I remember was an old room full of people hysterically laughing I'm gonna need to get surgery so I can use this I was being wheeled into emergency abdominal surgery once and my girlfriend was with me we're rolling down the hall and they have a mask after put me under and I pause and say to her don't let them touch my Dee the nurse smirked a little and they put the mask on me in somewhat of a panicked fashion I pulled the mask off stared up at my girlfriend and with full weight and seriousness told her they can look at it but no touching I heard the doctor laughing as the gas kicked in this takes the pie edit I have been shown the light of the holy pie when I came to from anesthesia the young nurse and my wife had me by the arms and were walking me to our car apparently I said to chicks at the same time in the tone of Lawrence from office space edit it wasn't major abdominal surgery it was a spinal nerve injection so just a few hours of being out and when it was time to go home I was still kaya's art this is particularly funny because they most certainly did touch OD with long surgeries under general anaesthetic you need a catheter so you don't leak all over the sterile field sorry they had a thing checking my heart and it fell off and it flatlined I told them goddammit who killed me quick we're losing me the I can't believe you've done this ah [ __ ] here's my impression of my wife during sex I'd like to dedicate the success of this comment to my wife may she some day awaken from the coma and/or exist doctor not with me you son of a bee this thread has taught me that doctors have sick comebacks my twin owes me big time for this one surgeon mine - anesthesiologist mine - me too thanks as they were pushing the drugs they asked me to count backwards from 10 all I could say was no the room erupted in laughter and I was out I can make me dock when I was a kid they told me to count back from 10 so I did I got all the zero and all the doctors were looking at one another extremely confused then just before they were about to do something i conked out when I was a kid I counted ten nine eight seven dot dot then opened my eyes and said six the anesthesiologist was unpleasantly surprised if I don't make it through this tell my wife I want her to be buried alive with me if I don't make it through this tell my wife I said hello all I know is my gut says maybe it's a beige alert when I had my wisdom teeth removed and was given general anaesthetic I apparently said if this is what being on drugs is like sign me up he went and told on me to my mother after I came to from having my wisdom teeth removed they helped me stand up I shook their hands off of me and yelled I've been drunk before and proceeded to fall straight onto my face apparently my mom heard me and just had the captain cook fathom going on when I came out but Pekar you swine it physically hurt me I once had to have my right hand operated on for a serious injury dr. grace will be be able to play guitar after this oh sure you will funny I never could before double quote the operating room feel silent can I play the piano anymore of course you can well I couldn't before I think I've heard the Joker's doctor will I be able to play piano after the surgery absolutely it's a very safe procedure awesome I've always wanted to be able to play an instrument as the anesthesiologist was putting me under he just said I'd start to feel sleepy soon I asked him aren't I supposed to be counting back from 100 or something he replied I don't know I must have skipped that class being an anesthesiologist must be awesome as you can always get the last word in anesthesiologist okay how are you feeling now me makes lame joke oddly at this point the room starts cracking up no way it was that funny right anesthesiologist tell you sir turns out he gave me a little anterograde amnesia before a spinal block endured my stupid joke then told the room watch this he's going to say the same dumb thing again word for word I like how you know it's a lame joke then get suspicious that people actually laughed at it classic schmosby bonus story another surgery Doc's are cool they let me be awake so I could watch it for fun surgery is happening I'm watching him on the monitor as he hacks away tissue inside my act-up joint it's sucking cool but hard to follow surgeon graciously explains things to me a little as he works I'm biting my tongue trying not annoy him by asking too many questions but of course I'm on drugs I probably got a little chatty last thing I remember I say something he just looks over at the anesthesiologist g' night who's the guy with the sign standing in the corner that's the other surgeon he's sitting in don't worry this will be painless with this anesthesia of course dr. Riya / MD I was being put under for a wisdom tooth extraction a few years back and it was the first time I've ever had anesthesia they used injection method rather than gas so they told me to watch the fluids going in so I could gauge when I'd feel sleepy I had this idea that I would say something like oh no doc I've lost my eyesight or something else preposterous before I could collect my thoughts I just immediately blurted well Shaykh III III III III III III I'd my voice progressively getting lower and passed out that made me laugh harder than any other comment clay Davis this was basically how I was putting under so how long will this circ if a happy this is some guru I will use the top comment in my surgery tomorrow please don't say you allergic to something last minute I know it seems funny but it could really screw up surgery schedule supplies and the text nurses schedule also it could cost them to panic for your safety I work in surgery sometimes when I operate the SI arm for fluoroscopy and I can tell you setting up and sticking to schedule is very very stressful at times your surgeon also might fire you as a patient sorry I had to be the one to rain on your parade I just know that the outcome would not justify the joke in this case just wait a few hours you will have a funnier line to give : edit I just got gold for this thanks kind stranger no worries I will use something where I won't screw the whole thing thank you for actually replying to the comments so we can all be reassured that you won't tuck up the surgery I cannot tell you how bad some of the other apps are with delivering stuff like that I asked for a tummy tuck while being wheeled in for a bowel resection I said while you're cutting it open just cut some off then when I was done my surgery but still pretty messed up on drugs I asked if I was skinny and then cried when my doctor told me he didn't give me a tummy tuck same doctor different procedure terribly inappropriate joke had to have a colonoscopy so they gave me some medication where I was awake but like it was weird anyways I was feeling silly and told him first time doing anal on camera and I'm not even getting paid terribly inappropriate joke you mean appropriate I asked for a tummy tuck after both of my c-sections doc gave me the same answer each time I make it work I don't make it pretty awful lot of white people in here me after being sedated for a colonoscopy this is even funnier if you're also white even funnier if you're the doctor the reminds me of the last colonoscopy I had the sedation didn't take and I woke up several times during the procedure yelling in pain and confusion before I conked out for good when I woke up the doctor tried to talk to me about how I was feeling but I was so upset and freaked out I hissed at him then refused to speak at all you have to look the surgeon squarely in the eyes and with a straight face whisper I want you inside me that's how you wake up with a prolapsed anus edit Alec I can't believe you've done this that's how you woke up with a prolapsed anus I want your tools inside me last time I went under as I started to fade I said you're gonna have to drive i mocked up probably came out you're gonna have a draw I'm Fuu I do method acting I like it when I got my wisdom teeth removed doctor all right so you feeling that sedative yet me yeah a little bit I bet I can stay awake though how long can people usually fight it doctor not long good night me blackout I remember laughing when I woke up because that was the last thing I remember I had this exact same conversation the only difference was I woke up halfway through them taking out my wisdom teeth my mother could hear my yelling from the waiting room the doctor was a little surprised edit would this be a good time to mention I had an upper GI scope last week and woke up during that too this one was less dramatic I made eye contact with the doctor and then tried to rip the scope out of my mouth then back under I went row so men who had woken up during procedures we should ban together and do something something nefarious edit - I do not have red hair nor am i Irish today I learned red hair can indicate a resilience to anesthesia same here for my wisdom teeth woke up saw blood all over the surgeons hands heard a crunch they had to shatter a tooth thought to myself well at that and went right back to sleep I tend to get massive erections while under anesthesia but it's fine just tape it down if it gets in the way I had surgery in April and my doctor told me I had an erection I didn't even care at it holy crap my highest-rated comment thanks guys and gals for anybody that was wondering I had a cyst removal edit - thanks for the gold friend I will treasure it forever how did that conversation go so doc how'd it all go excellent no problems at all and you should be good to go tomorrow morning you had a huge erection okay I don't even care you didn't care that your doctor thought to point out that you had an erection when he should have been busy doing his job unless it was n surgery WTF is he doing even mentioning that oh by the way your foot twitches when your foot too aged I had just woken up after having my shoulder worked on I was in and out of consciousness for a bit and just generally a king whacked out I guess I shifted in the bed and moved the blankets a bit and exposed myself as the nurse came in she smiled and moved the blankets back I apparently told the nurse you saw mine do I get to see yours my wife was in the chair next to the bed I remember thinking the nurse was smoking hot I woke up and she told me she was flattered I have no idea what I said if something goes wrong and I go into a coma don't you dare Rocking cut my coma beard yes mom thanks for doing this there aren't many surgeons out there who would operate on someone without health insurance wakes up in the parking lot wearing a surgery gown without a kidney and a bill for a hospital stay I had broken my wrist and was being put under to have four pins inserted they gave me my anesthesia through an eyes I felt coldness breeding up my arm and across my chest the nurse asked how I was doing and I said this must be what dying feels like I heard her say oh my god then I was out so did you die yes my condolences I actually did the same thing before both of mine I managed to get out I'll see you in the future doc or something either way once the drugs kicked in I didn't care edit a word I actually just remembered I didn't get to say anything the first time as I was about to lay down on the table they were stepping my arms down and I [ __ ] you not the women says okay put your arms out like a tee yeah it's like you're being crucified I only got out what then I woke up and looked at the first women I said I mocking hungry oh [ __ ] sorry she laughed and gave me goldfish that's heavy to the surgeon and nurse I just want you both to know good luck we're all counting on you surely you can't be serious I am serious and don't call me Shirley that's my line just before I blacked out the Annie statists said to me this is the stuff that killed Michael Jackson you can fondle me while I'm out if you want they already do that it's called a catheter and if they don't do it you piss yourself during surgery I would prefer pissing myself than having a tube pushed up my wiener would you prefer having a tube pushed up your wiener or dying of septic shock because you peed into your own surgical wounds edit my top comment is now about death by surgical whizzing reddit please never change before going under for wisdom teeth the doctors said I might feel funny they push the drugs and asked if I felt any difference Myra and only Meyer began to itch like crazy and it was hot not war hot like I just hate peppers with my behind I told them Maya's eating like crazy febrile him distant was really bad and holding back a laugh the doc resisted mightily but he too succumbed to my newly discovered butthole emotions for the record my wife does not like it in the butt because I said this before my surgery my wife is that all nurse who works at the hospital I was in I don't remember saying this but her co-workers remember it how did that go over later she took it pretty well I told her at least I didn't say you love it in the butt side steps as she took it pretty well joke join our community discord link in description you'll end know if you see my phone in there I am getting my operated on at the end of the year save yo if you find a pair of plastic horses in there don't worry the situation is stable row I actually have a relevant story that happened recently as I was getting ready to go under they were placing a device in my mouth to keep me from biting down on the scope they were going to use for the endoscopy sink medical board gag but a hard plastic ring instead of a ball as the gal was placing it in I asked wait what's the safe word I heard a good amount of laughing as the world turned to black edit a word your wife has agreed behind my surgeon told me to think of a happy place then he asked me where it was The Simpsons kicked in and I told him it was the happiest place on earth Tijuana I didn't stay awake long enough to see if he got the reference Tahiti it's a magical place patient knock knock medical staff who's there patient nobody medical staff nobody who classic exit that'd be a great time to try the reverse knock knock you wanna hear a knock-knock joke then Hobbs you okay you start though then knock knock you out Cole's how do you keep a surgeon in suspense I want my baby back baby back baby back I want my baby back baby back baby back then the surgeon will be all pissed the whole time because you never finished it as soon as you wake up try and muster reei EOBs Chile's another version I see you shiver with anta see and when you wake up dirt passion do it Calculon style we should start this surgery with a dramatic wake up pause this surgery is going to be legend passes out wakes up Terry while going under did I ever tell you how I got these scars coming to that's how there is another sky Walker waking from anesthesia one time I heard someone say his blood pressure is a little high then I mumbled that'd be the English theorists but in distance fault they then kinda startled asked quickly why is that becoming slightly more coherent I continued with she's really hot they all laughed and said he'll be fine and released from theater how it really sounded his blood pressure is a little high Taub the analysis for hinter what was that she's Wiley hurgh who the who gave us man out of here pre-op Marco post-op polo just a forewarning but I am plagued by wet dreams hello darkness my old friend Greg's come to talk with Greg again I remember being a celebrity hospital after I said I love my girlfriend cause she got big titties when I'd go in I'd have doctors and nurses teasing me I was 16 at the time here's one that actually happened my grandmother's sister was getting an epidural done for one of her children when she came to everybody involved couldn't stop giggling around her and she had no idea why until it comes out later that while she was doped she had repeated one of my great grandfather's favorite problems at logic if your shoved up to your neck backwards up a sheep's behind and there's a bear come in to eat here what do I do till you pull your head in all bite the sheep's behind to make it run faster it's a shame he died before I was born that man related comment but doesn't really answer the question my dad was in the middle of a surgery repairing some pretty nasty damage on his wrist after a skiing accident but he was under heavy anesthesia but the surgeons were having serious trouble with the screws in his wrist which apparently jarred him around enough to wake up he noticed their struggles and managed to say righty-tighty lefty-loosey then he passed back out when I got my wisdom teeth out the dentist's office was right next to a funeral I told the guy that if anything went horribly wrong they could just take me next-door mother and doctor were not amused here's to relapsing so after my dad had a triple bypass and was just waking up and they had removed the breathing tube I was in the room with him I said something along the lines of everything went perfect with your surgery - no problems my dad in his drug haze said that is because I am a perfect specimen of a human male and it couldn't have gone any other way nurses were cracking up last time I went under started to feel a sort of paralysis and couldn't move Hey whoa did you give me something nurse yes relax and don't fight it me okay but you should sell this stuff at the gift shop everybody laughs surgeon are you okay me yep but I'm disappointed there's no cake surgeon laughing on the recovery nodes right give the patient cake next thing I know I'm waking up in recovery with a slice of chocolate cake on the table next to me my wife went to the dentist last weekend after several shots of numbing she sang to him I can't feel my face when I'm with you till a dentist critic without batting an eyelid he replied in full voice cause i numbed it I had to get some surgery that involved cutting open my head right before they gassed me I said I should warn you there's a spooky skeleton in there the last thing I remember is his response of I'll try to look out for that hail Hydra as in anesthesiologists let me clear some things up here rarely is the surgeon even in the or during induction going to sleep time usually just the anesthesiologist or nurse and person that helps with instruments for the surgery are present I've heard and seen every crazy thing imaginable including people's deepest fears and secrets mostly this is caused by a pre medication such as versed removing inhibitions every now and again I'll hear something that will even make the entire room chattel 99.99% of the time whatever you say has already been said and isn't nearly as funny or original as you think I often hear from patients in quilt that their biggest concern is saying something they will regret and I always reassure them the majority of people talk a lot less than the ones that do talk usually hold relatively normal conversations for the brief period of time of getting a pre medication - going under full general anesthesia now as we are talking a case involving moderate or deep sedation and not general anesthesia it's completely different if I were to have surgery and the anesthesiologists not know me or my profession I am sure I do my best to prank him by saying something completely obscure about anesthesia and just give him a wink edit since my inbox is getting filled with medical questions please talk to your anesthesiologists the day of surgery about your complete medical history it all matters let him/her determine what is important to your care this is kind of relevant but I recently had ankle surgery and just after waking up our looks at everyone and said already finished that was quick and they all looked at me with extremely annoyed looks on their faces and the surgeon said that took us four hours don't do any but staff ba-ba-ba-ba-ba I want to be sedated better linked related part of two minutes Mark said over and over again as long as possible until you pass out edit or not a bar and a better link I swear to God if I wake up as Robocop oh god I feel like I'm going to have diarrhea get me2 eight oil zips I said said said said said said said said said said and with this the Blood Pact is complete thanks for watching subscribe for three videos a day [Music] you

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Keywords: ask reddit, What is a funny thing to say to a surgeon before anesthesia?, doctor, doctor story, surgeon, anesthesia, surgeon story, funny, planet reddit, doctor stories, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit cringe, reddit top posts, reddit, updoot reddit, best reddit posts, funny reddit, reddit story, askreddit funny, reddit funny, askreddit, reddit best, askreddit top posts, askreddit stories, funny reddit stories, askreddit scary, funny askreddit, askreddit question

Id: H6G-ix9S2YQ

Length: 24min 11sec (1451 seconds)

Published: Sun May 03 2020