What did your parents teach you that you had to unlearn? - (r/AskReddit)

like and subscribe right now or else this will be in your bed tonight our /oscar edit by planet Reddit what did your parents teach you that you had to unlearn well my grandpa told me that soda evaporates quickly as in half akan in 20 minutes when I was around 6 took me like 10 years to realize he's been drinking my soda when my back is turned I always drank my soda fast when outside or in hot places because of it that's really funny I bet he had a good chuckle to himself every time he did it wanting anything is selfish edit I'm glad I wasn't the only one hope you all have a beautiful night learning too under this train of thought is the greatest feat of my life it's still hard for me to attempt for first place in any form of competition I always feel that someone else is more deserving so I don't give it my all if I do win I am always certain it was a fluke this applies to my relationships in the worst way too I have a hard time dating because I am convinced that if I date than that I would taking them off the market and someone more deserving would be losing out or how I have a strong desire to be dominant in the bedroom but I'm constantly guilting myself for wanting those things so I either submit all beat around the bush it doesn't matter what I want I am undeserving and to achieve is selfish and wrong duck that thought process my parents are deaf so I had to relearn how to pronounce a lot of phrases and words my mother told me I had another middle name one day Aloisius I hated it of course but eventually came to terms with the idea it was years later that she realized I had been writing an extra middle name or literally everything that required my full name and asked me why I was doing such an odd thing she had forgotten what she had done when I told her she laughed at me for about an hour straight tears rolling down her face laughing so hard she peed herself yeah thanks equals equals equals she taught me capsicum seeds were poisonous they aren't she really believes this one though equals equals equals a bunch of other stupid stuff edit half of it to troll me the rest because she believes weird stuff yeah I misspelled the name you should have seen how I spelled it when I was seven my grandfather thought it was hilarious to threaten me with renaming he swore he would get my dad to change my name to Wolfgang Helmut IV if I misbehaved I believed it wholeheartedly nobody in my family was ever named Wolfgang Helmut and I am female Wolfgang Helmut sounds like a badess name my mother is convinced all clothes are too tight unless they are falling off you I look like a ragamuffin for years until my rich sister-in-law pulled me aside and went sweetie I'm gonna take you shopping before you ever have to attend any job interviews looking like that Oh Lord when I was 12 my mother bought me two new pairs of size 9 jeans because I was just going to keep getting bigger I was a size 3 20 years later I've still never worn a 9 stroke 10 when I was a skinny teenage girl my parents bought me immense large rain jacket from LL Bean I'm now an adult who's 20 pounds overweight and it's study I learn it away to bake WTF were they thinking these things are expensive and I'm sure our girl will grow up to play linebacker for the Jets LL Bean will accept that as a reason for exchanging that jacket for one that fits they have an amazing lifetime warranty my mom used to take me clothes shopping and squeeze the guts of jeans to make sure they were super duper loose so you don't look like a slob I have a naturally enormous ass so I was always wearing jeans that were incredibly loose with belts just so my ass didn't look like a slob and they were always men's jeans what food tastes like chicken is not supposed to be tough dry and chewy steak is not usually chewy flattened gray there are more seasonings available than salt and pepper once I taught myself to cook the world just opened up with new flavors and foods it was the best my mom wonders why I don't like her steak and accuses me of being lazy and not wanting to chew when it's a chewy gray dry taste less mess my mom thought I had an eating disorder the truth is that I just didn't want to eat plain boiled chicken for dinner five days a week boiled bugger me I mean my parents food was bland but this is ducking child abuse when did you grow up I had the same thing happened growing up in the Midwest with a family that literally thinks ketchup is too spicy the only seasoning used was salt and everything was really dry and bland I hated meat especially steak because it was dry and chillier than gum since that was all I knew I assumed I hated American food and when I taught myself how to cook as an adult I only prepared Asian and Mexican food because it actually had some flavor and seasoning to it then I had a girlfriend who wanted to eat American meals so I looked up recipes for dishes I didn't even really like just to make for her imagine my surprise when foods I thought I hated actually tasted good when I didn't overcook them and put in some spices and seasoning things got even better when I met a guy who was a cook in a southern soul food restaurant who introduced me to southern cooking to be a bystander for lack of a better term my parents are very against me standing up for others and even myself in some cases and I had to learn that standing up for other people is the right thing to do also how to pronounce cucumbers edit for those of you wondering they pronounced it koo kumba a few years back our upstairs neighbors in our apartment would fight at least two or three times a week I'd always mentioned to my family that I wanted to call the police because we all know there's some kind of abuse going on upstairs but my grandma insisted I stay out of it one night I couldn't stand it so I took my dog out for a walk and while I was out called the police I come back home five to ten minutes later and the police are outside I feigned surprise to my family neighbors to their side must have finally called my grandma said yeah at least someone called eventually right I mean hypothetically if we did call sooner sure we'd save someone upstairs months and months of abuse but eh it's best we stay out of the way right yes a week later the apartment above us was empty and the girl was nowhere to be seen with them my family still doesn't know I was the one that cool but I'm still damn proud that I did didn't even realize how much this riles me up until I typed this out holy [ __ ] weird how your grandma seemed to express relief about others calling as if the right thing had to be done but just not by anyone in the family grandma probably just didn't want anyone in her family to get involved in fear of possible retaliation which is totally real there's a reason cops hate domestic calls they are the most likely to be deadly quantity over quality though my family was economically stable privileged even my parents grew up in poverty so their way of buying was to buy cheap which definitely should be taken into consideration but ultimately if the quality is not there you end up spending more to continuously replace the item we could afford to buy things of better quality that would last longer but that's just not how they grew up it still hurts me to spill $60 on a nice pair of shoes that will last more than a year but I have since learned that I would much rather spend this $60 one time rather than getting three pairs of $20 crappy no brand shoes that hurt my feet and fall apart every few months I remember getting my first job and saving my money for an expensive pair of shoes and nice clothes for school my parents were livid that I spend good money on overpriced crap and didn't care how I looked or that I spent my own money to buy what I liked I asked them what should I have bought they said I should have bought cheaper clothes and shoes I knew that I had to buy better quality because growing up the cheap stuff never lasted and didn't look good in before finds boot theory of economics that the garbage disposal will not trigger a nuclear reaction and blow up half the world within 5 seconds of being turned on without cold water running that was a tough one to unlearn dot I didn't believe you about to test it if Southeast Michigan suddenly disappears you know what did it well because I doubt it myself still alive disposal was just slightly louder that you don't have to marry everyone one you date my mom was married seven times and taught us that you never left anyone no matter if they were horrible to you to call your money and treated your kids like [ __ ] and that you could fix them if you married them it took me are moving out and talking with other people that is not normal and people break up all the time luckily I never married any of those guys join our community discord link in description that you should never do anything for others because nobody will do anything for you I understand because my mom came from a very rough household growing up but it was frustrating whenever she found out I bought lunch for my friends or gave someone a ride it would always be the nobody will look out for you why do the same that sucks I probably would have thought that if it went for my classmates mom in second grade she bought me new shoes because she knew my mom couldn't afford it that year then never asked for anything didn't even expect me to hang out with her kid she just gave shoes and disappeared and is a huge part of the reason I am Who I am even if people can't pay you back or say more than thanks they definitely appreciates the nice things you do and it can have a positive effect on the world my mom told me always give but never expect anything in return it's nice to be a giver but not so nice when people are always taking there's a happy balance between our norms dichotomies giving lets you learn something about what kind of person is receiving as long as you don't expect anything in return you are making out way ahead for example I went to grab some coffee and grabbed Erasmus bar for my teammates there's six of us handed it around on a plate with a knife for them to cut off what they wanted everyone took some and handed it on new guy let's call him Jim by the time it came around to Jim there was about half left he picked up the knife started to cut some off then change his mind and ate the whole thing didn't look around to see if anyone hadn't had any some hadn't didn't check to see if it was okay just scuffed it what I learned was that you don't assume that Jim will feel obligated to do his fair share of work if you're splitting work with him make sure it's really really clear what he's expected to do that was his second week there and it's been pretty accurate since then he does his work but if he doesn't see it as his work he doesn't feel obligated to help out I'm having a really hard time picturing someone legitimately doing that without so much as a twinge of shame or feeling selfish how much insight must one luck - seriously act like that that anger doesn't have to be the default reaction to anything you don't like someone has a different opinion they're telling you you're wrong and stupid and you should be pissed someone make an offhand comment that struck you the wrong way they're a-holes you should be pissed anything anytime anywhere happened that you didn't like for any reason be pissed no thanks it makes for [ __ ] life edit while you guys I'm glad that this is something positive for everyone and a lot of people have asked how to do this for themselves or others so instead of trying to reply to everyone I'll give the shortest answer here first realize that being angry at everything is going to make life pretty horrible then it's just reminding yourself every time you have that gut reaction to ask yourself if it's worth it or not nine times out of ten it's not if it's situational try and make the best of it as best you can pending on the situation obviously if it's personal try to see the other person's perspective if they're just being an a-hole think of something you're going to enjoy doing later smile and wish them a great duck off while you go about your day because they hold unto earth your emotional effort of being angry : my mother was and still is like this everything she says is about how stupid someone is even if they didn't do anything wrong I didn't realize how extremely mean and ill-tempered she was until a few months ago I just thought it was normal for the longest time my wife met my mom and thought my mom hated her I had to explain that my mom just complains about everything and everyone somehow I turned out the opposite of her and my father who yelled at me for anything I did you'd think I was stoned I'm so calm and focused guess they're crazy parenting had a negative effect on me lucky me d that shouting of getting violent towards your problems is the only way to deal with things my dad thought it was funny to teach my sister brother and I the wrong names to things sister confuses plates and bowls brother confuses forks and spoons I get confused with beetroot and capsicum I get it right most of the time now edit I haven't seen dog tooth never heard of it until today yes I'm Ozzy dad wasn't abusive it was a funny prank on his children I still love him we trained him wrong as a joke how about my nuts to your fists style my friend referred to Parmesan cheese a sprinkle cheese until he was well into his teens because of his mom that stuff in the jar isn't really parmesan so you might as well call it sprinkle cheese my mom is obsessively clean it took me a couple years into my marriage to stop cleaning to her standards I am NOT a dirty person but I don't have a fit about a little dust till debase sports she should see my carpets right now I've been sewing there is scraps and threads all over she 2h my mom is a semi hoarder so I would consider you lucky buck isn't it awful being a child of a holder I'm not at all a hoarder myself but I do feel like it's a struggle to keep things clean and organized because of how I grew up God yes I've got the edge though the worst part for me is that my mom's type of hoarding is sensible garbage is garbage and gets thrown away but broken things aren't always garbage all that cool rustic looking furniture you see on Etsy and [ __ ] my mom has an eye for that sort of thing someone throws out an old dresser she can see that if you just strip the shitty paint off fix the broken slide cheapest shifts to do and slap a sealant on it it'll look ducking gorgeous it's all very sane the problem is she sees these awesome projects all the time and finds it very difficult to turn one down combined with her mediocre health plus her many many other interests they don't get done and pile up my sister and I have the same eye and it's hard you see all this awesome [ __ ] you know you can do but then you have to stop and think okay I see what I want to do do I have room do I have time do I have the money do I have the energy and if you fail any of those you have to let it go or it piles up fortunately my sister's husband will throw it out if it sits for too long and I periodically go through all my [ __ ] and downsize so neither of us has the piles and pathways in our homes oh man my parents keep almost everything free cheap or that you could possibly reuse and they don't care about anything being ugly those big yogurt containers baby food jars where do they even get them they don't even buy baby food twists sighs they'll got to the dollar store and spent $60 to $100 oh and my dad used to travel for work and still has a box full of 13 plus year old unused mini shampoos and soaps I have to really make a conscious effort to not keep everything just because it might be useful one day cooking chicken until college I thought that chicken was supposed to be dry I hated it my buddy cooked me chicken parmesan and it was the best chicken I ever had my mom is paranoid and over cooks the hell out of everything to make sure it's safe wasn't until I dated someone who cooked with a thermometer that how I realized that meat doesn't have to taste like cardboard I bought my mom an instant-read thermometer and have tried to get her to use it but she can't shake that feeling of it's not done enough unless it's been cooked twice as long as it should be the bonus she also hates cooking because it takes so long for example 30 meters to grill a steak for example 30 meters to grill a steak this was painful to read it's even more painful to leave at that point why spend money on steak when you can just eat the charcoal instead that just because someone is older than me doesn't mean they know more than me yes it's true I don't have as much experience or knowledge about things in the world but it is possible for me to know something that someone who is older than me doesn't know my dad always used the I'm older / wiser / more experienced line if I said something a fact or piece of information that he didn't agree with or think was true it made me feel a little insecure about what I know and if what I know is right or not my mom taught me that I had to respect my elders even if they were possibly wrong because they were older and wiser my dad on the other hand sat me down one day and said son people are ducking stupid just because they are older doesn't mean they know [ __ ] from apple butter I don't care how old they are if they don't know their ass from a hole in the ground it's okay to call him a dumb bonus you are going to run into people who are smarter than you but you're also going to run into people who will make you wonder just how in the hell they manage to not drown themselves while taking a piss in the morning you can know a lot or you can't know a little a smart man knows that he doesn't know everything he also knows the value of common sense your father has a way with words my mother believes mothers are the absolute authority because she's a mother with being older and more wise doesn't understand why I fight with her on topics frequently though she was there 18 why when she had my older brother and even though she preaches safe driving every time I'm in the car with her she'll refused to wear the seatbelt and will clip it behind her so the beeping sound will turn off it sounds like she spent her entire life being wrong and for once had people in her life who didn't know more than she did infants so she's clinging desperately onto that ability to say dumb [ __ ] and not be called out on it that emperor nasi goreng built the Great Wall of China to keep the rabbits out that I'm not done eating until the plate is clear I remember dining with this very traditional Italian family my plate was never empty because they kept giving me more without me saying anything if that were the rule I'd still be eating with that family 20 years later finishing your plate is a sign that you want more food if you don't want anymore leave a little bit oh but don't expect them to stop feeding you quietly sometimes it's easier to just keep eating until Nemo starts falling asleep at the table Italian food cooked by an Italian grandmother is so good that nature had to balance the experience by making you deal with an Italian grandmother to eat it thanks for watching subscribe for 3 videos a day [Music]

Channel: Ask Planet

Views: 298,412

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Keywords: what did your parents teach you that you had to unlearn?, how have your parents messed you up, r/askreddit, askreddit, best of reddit, askreddit funny, reddit, what dirt secret does your profession hide reddit, reddit stories, ask reddit, what dirty secret does your profession hide, bad parents, parents, askreddit stories, updoot reddit, reddit cringe, funny askreddit, funny reddit, people of reddit, reddit top posts

Id: ZIFh4ad08FY

Length: 21min 8sec (1268 seconds)

Published: Tue Mar 17 2020