- You good? You good? You good? You good? - Just doing my hair. - All right, we're just gonna wait here and just let Connor do his hair, I guess. - I can't even see what I'm
doing, I'm just bullshitting. (gentle electronic jingle) - Hello, and welcome to another
episode of "Trash Taste." I am your host for today, Gigguk, and with me today, I do not have a guest! (Joey laughs) - For the first time! - This feels so refreshing. Like, for like, the past two
times we've had guests on, and I just haven't been
able to sit in the center where I deserve to be. - I love how the, as well
the subreddit has come up with this controversy
or like conspiracy that, "Oh, Garnt is the one that always hosts all the guest episodes
because he's the most social out of the three." - It's like, no,
- No, there is no conspiracy, it was just a coincidence that both times it was my scheduled time to be a guest. But this is my time now, I get this side. - Finally, you're sitting by yourself. You get the entire camera to yourself.
- Yeah, I know. And we're meeting again
with the boys, as per usual. - What was that drop in energy, Garnt? You just got like, sad, bro. - I know! And there's the boys there. - It's Gigguk! And the
boys, it's whatever. - I should be the tired one,
I've been up since 4:00 AM. - Why were you up since four? - I was doing fucking
Carson's pool tournament. (laughing) - Thank you for inviting all
of us by the way, Carson. But there was only one madman between our group who
was willing to wake up at like, 3:30 AM? - 3:30 AM, and then I had
Japanese school after, so I had to go into Tokyo and then I had to come back here and do the podcast. But Carson, fuck you for kicking
me out of the tournament! As you, I don't know if you, you guys probably didn't see this. I was crushing my opponent. - Joey, do you wanna
explain the tournament? - So it was an eight ball
pool tournament, right? and 64 bracket, and I was first to play. So I didn't have any
knowledge of what the, this fucking pool table looked like an eight bit Windows kind of game, it was fucking awful. He kept saying, "No, it's
great" on the stream. It was fucking awful, Carson. I like you, Carson, by the way. (laughing) - I like you, Carson, but I
don't like your pool table. - This pool sucked, Carson! Anyway, immediately, I was against Botez and I just started clapping her, dude. I was getting all of these
balls in, no problem whatsoever. And I was down to the eight ball and then like, something weird happened on the fucking, in the pool thing, right? And I'm like, "Carson, what is this?" He's like, "Oh, don't worry.
Just click, just click." So I just clicked. I shouldn't have believed Carson, because of course he's gonna troll me. It's the first game. So I just ignored it, potted
the black, and I'm like, "Right, see you guys in the next round." And I was about to leave the call, and then they were like,
"Wait, you lost, Connor." And I'm like, "What do you mean, I lost?!" Like, oh, you picked the wrong hole. I'm like, "It didn't give me-" Oh my god, Carson fucking played me, bro. Carson, why?! - Because in eight ball, you have to select which pocket you're gonna put the eight ball in, and if you put it in a different hole, then you automatically lose. - I feel so lied to because on Miniclip, on
the eight ball pool game, - (in high-pitched voice) Miniclip! - Right? - Going way back! - But it's from Miniclip, right? The game? This game, which is the one that I know he plays all the time, you don't have to select a fucking pocket, you just hit it in any of them! I felt lied to.
- That's normie rules though, bro, that aint competition rules. - Justice for CDawg,
man, that's all I want. Give me my 20K cash prize. - The thing I noticed
about playing pool is like, I swear, every country I play pool in with a different person, everyone has their own fucking rules. I don't know what happens half the time. - It's like Uno and Monopoly. - Yeah, it's like the free
parking spot in Monopoly. Everyone just makes up
their own fucking rules, no one knows what the actual rule is. - It's just, no, no, the
actual rule is nothing happens. That's just, that's genuine, - Really?
- That's the actual rule, - Because in my house,
- nothing happens! - what you would do is you know how you have to pay- - The taxes!
- Pay taxes and 50 bucks - Yeah, that's bullshit.
- to get out of jail? All of that money goes into the middle, and then if you land on free
parking, you get the pot. - I think that's hopeless optimism. 'Cause, y'know, we like to
think our taxes go somewhere, perhaps to someone else. They don't, they just
get sucked into a hole. They don't get, nothing
comes of your taxes, you're not happy about it, okay? That's what happens,
I remember I saw this. - That makes more sense. - Yeah, nothing happens. (laughing)
- And it's just sad! - It's just taxes. - I don't know how this
one rule in Monopoly just got spread around like, globally, even though it was not on
any rule books, I think. - Like pity rules. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I think because it's so depressing to do a roll in Monopoly, and
it's like, "Wait, nothing?" Like nothing, like not even a bad thing? No, no just nothing.
- Especially when it's already a game when nothing
fucking happens sometimes. It's like, "Oh, I landed
on my own property." - Could you imagine if
there was a white circle on Mario Party, and it was like, "Oh my god, what's gonna happen?" Just nothing, nothing,
nothing's gonna happen, because it's white. - Okay, have you guys ever
completed a game of Monopoly? I have never completed a game. - Yeah, yeah.
- Of course. - I don't know, I just
don't have that patience. - Dude, I would like, I am so competitive that I will trap everyone.
- Of course you are! Of course you are! - I will trap everyone in the
room until the game is over. - This just calls for
a Monopoly episode now. We need to play Monopoly for- - How long is a game of
Monopoly meant to last? - Depends how much you suck (laughing). - Because I've been in Monopoly games that I've lost like two, three hours. And I'm just like- - That's a short game. - Okay, this is the thing,
some people don't do this. Do you let auctions happen? 'Cause I think in the rules, auctions, aw fuck, are they allowed? - Yeah, they're allowed. - I thought they were
allowed, I could be wrong now. - I just get to a point in Monopoly where just the money is just circular. You know what I mean? Where people are just passing
the cans to each other. That's exactly what it feels like playing a game of
Monopoly that I'm used to. - I like to do the mind games just let my opponents know immediately from the get-go how I'm playing them, and maybe they give up. - Maybe it would end faster if it wasn't for the free parking rule. - Yeah, probably. - That's probably why,
- Probably why nothing happens - It's like, "Oh, shit,
I've got 50 bucks left. Thank god I landed on free parking." $2,000 comes to me and then it just keeps repeating over and over again. - There shouldn't be a way for someone who has no properties
to get back in the game. They should be out, they
deserve to be out for their poor financial decisions.
- So maybe if we do play it on the podcast or whatever, then we should just completely
get rid of that rule. - Exactly. - And free parking is just a white spot. - We'll get Maylene on as well, right? and then we can play Monopoly. - Maylene, do you wanna play Monopoly with us for an episode? - Yeah, She says yes.
- She said yes. She said, "Absolutely, boys!" - Going back to pool though, what are the rules when you foul? 'Cause I swear there's a different fucking rule in every country. When you do a foul, do you
get control of the white ball? Do you get two shots? What is the rule? - So my understanding, I don't know what the official rules
are, but my understanding is if you sink the white
ball, then you can place- - Put it wherever you want. - You can place it wherever you want.
- But is wherever you want past a certain line? Or is it whenever you want- - That's what I thought it was! (laughing) But apparently it's not. - Isn't that snooker? - Yeah, that's a different gamer form. - Fuck, dude, I don't wanna say anything 'cause I'm gonna be wrong
no matter what I say. - We're probably wrong here and there's gonna be someone
in the comments that's like, "Oh, I know the
international rules of pool. You are all wrong." - If you pot two in a row,
multiball happens, where there's, no, I'm joking. (laughing) I'm chatting shit. - I thought you were serious there! - I was like, "Multiball? What's that?" Just sweating. - Like pinball, right? When all the, it's like
the best part, man. - No, I think, like yeah,
because every single person I've gone to Baggis with to play pool, they're just like, "Oh,
it's two shots, right?" It's like, "No, no, no, no. It's behind this white line and then you have to shoot it forward." No, you can place it anywhere. It's different every single time, it's just like whatever. - People just make up their own rules. There's always house
rules, and I don't know, America works in its own system, Asia works on another system, and Europe works on its own system. I don't fucking know,
I just go with the flow most of the time. - Yeah, because recently
I found out with Uno. Do you stack the plus two cards? - Yeah, that's a rule. - No, it's not. - That's not a rule? - The official rule is you can't stack plus two.
- That's so fucking boring. - I know! - That's so lame.
- I looked it up because there were so many people who were like, "No you can't stack plus two,"
or "You can stack plus two." And everybody thought yes, of course you can stack plus two. That makes the game so
much more interesting. I looked up the official rules, you can't stack plus twos. - But that's not fun! - Exactly. - And also Joey, fuck it, and I remember this pissed me off, dude. There was a 30 minute game of Uno and I just wanted it to end, right? And what I normally do in
Uno is that I will save the all color cards until the
end so that I can just win when I get Uno. And Joey was like, "Oh,
no, you can't do that. You can't put down, it
has to be a solid color." - That is an official rule. - On the Uno game on
the PC, you can do that. Explain that, Joey, yeah, yeah, man. - PC's not canon. - Dude, what do you mean?
- We were also very drunk then when we were playing that game. - We were also shouting
out a different Stand name for the different colors. - I was just asleep by the end of it, and Joey was the only one who wanted to drag on the suffering. - It was like, 2:00 AM or something, we were all heavily drunk. I was struggling to keep my eyes open.
- I wanted to go home, I wanted to sleep.
- And when you ended the game, I was secretly like, "Yes,
yes! It's finally over." Then Joey goes, "Um, excuse
me, that is not a rule. You cannot end the game like that. - Look, if you're gonna put me through a 30 minute fucking
Uno game, I wanna win! I wanna win on the proper rules! - It's Uno, who gives a fuck, man? It's not even a skill-based game. - [Connor] It's not, it's not. - I just had fun, just every
time there was a red card just being like fucking, what was it? it's like Magician's
Red every single time. - The people in the other room must've though what the
fuck is happening in there? They're just screaming,
"Magician's Red every two seconds." - Hierophant Green every
time we dropped a green card. - Before we move on to the
actual topic of this podcast, though, you were talking
about what was it, Miniclip? Just reminded me of like, all
the, did you guys ever play- - I spent my whole life on
Miniclip when I was growing up. - Do you guys remember the
good old-fashioned flash games that you have to play
on your school internet, because actual games wouldn't work. - I remember being in the
lunch break, being like, yo, "I know which website
Bloons Tower Defense is on." (laughing) Come, come on, I'll show you. Type in this code. Bloons Tower Defense Two is available on this URL, I know. - It's all about helicopter game, man. Remember that helicopter game, which was like pre-Angry Birds? - Oh yeah, I remember that one. - It was the most difficult gameplay with just the space bar. (laughing) - When that, when what,
somehow one of those websites with all of the games
got through the filter it was like opening the flood gates, and you were like, "Holy shit!" - Yeah because I remember
in my primary school, Miniclip was immediately banned. - Yeah, Miniclip was banned.
- Oh, yeah yeah yeah. - But then someone was like "I know a website called Albino Sheep, and it's not blocked on the firewall. But don't tell the teachers! It's got all the games!" - Did you ever have someone like, 'cause in the schools, right? All the PCs are hooked up
to like, the main admin one. - [Garnt] Yeah, yeah, yeah. - One of the kids in my school changed the background of all the things and it was the funniest fucking shit. 'Cause it was like, 'cause the teacher left
the room for one moment, and he changed all the
backgrounds to Alien vs. Predator. But, the predator was just like, a priest. (laughing) And so, a bunch of 13 year old kids are just doing their thing
and then they minimize like, Word document or the fucking PowerPoint, and they just see like,
fucking one of the popes holding hands with the predator, uh, with the alien, or something. And it was just the
funniest fucking thing ever, I remember being so amused by this. - That, that is just
peak 12 year old comedy. - I love it.
- Yeah. - I remember just 12 year old me thought, "Man, nothing's ever gonna
live up to this moment, bro. That was the funniest shit ever." - This is the best prank of all time. - This is just giga-brain,
bro, I can't imagine it. - I remember like, IT
class back in the day. In school, IT class was just
like a second playground. - Oh, dude, everyone just fucked around. - Yeah.
- Yeah. - It was, it was, nobody
actually did the work, and I remember like, if
you had to do the work, it was a five minute job. - Yeah, because they
were teaching you stuff that you were probably already using. Like, They used to teach us
Microsoft Word and PowerPoint, not even like Excel. And everyone, everyone at age 10 already knows how to use PowerPoint. At least, at our age they did. I don't know about now, it
might just be different. But when I was growing up, everyone knew how to use PowerPoint. Everyone had made a PowerPoint for like, every other class that they had. - But they had to go above
and beyond by being like, "Do you know a thing called transitions?" (laughing) They'll really spice up a presentation. - Word art. - [Garnt] Yeah, Word art. - Clip art.
- Oh, god. - God, I remember first
discovering transitions on PowerPoint and you would just use that for every fucking slide and you thought you were the fucking shit. - Every single letter had a transition. - There was that one kid
who would just do, like, okay, bear in mind, this
transition is 30 seconds long. Just watching each single
letter just bouncing into the screen. - The star shaking the middle, and the last little moment would take fucking forever to lock in. I remember that one, man. - I remember this one time in my IT class, we had to create a website, right? So we could choose a
website on whatever topic we wanted to create. So, at the time, - Why aren't we sponsored by Squarespace? - I know, this would be
perfect for Squarespace, but, Yeah, I chose to make a website
on the original Nintendo DS. - Okay, very specific. - Yeah, I don't know. I don't know why, 'cause I was a Nintendo kid back then. And I remember I was
doing a really good job. My teacher was, at the time, really impressed at the
website I had created because I was actually putting effort in unlike the other kids who
were just dicking around like you do in IT class. And then he was asking me, "Oh, so what are you gonna name it?" 10-year-old me, I was
nine or 10 years old, was trying to think of
the coolest name possible. I was like, how about DS Dominator? No, no, I got a better one. How about DS Dominatrix? (laughing) 'Cause I was like dominator, domina, like dominatrix for a nine year old who doesn't know what it means sounds like a cool fucking word! - It's like dominator and "The Matrix." (laughing) - That was like, exactly my mindset. And I just remember the the
teacher's face being like, - Um, probably sh-
- That's great, but- - Probably shouldn't call it that. And I was like, why? It's such a cool word! Dominatrix! - Tell me why!
- I'm gonna call it Dominatrix and he refused to let
me call it dominatrix. And nine year old me was so fucking pissed 'cause I thought of a
fucking brilliant name. (laughing) - You don't understand me! The genius! - Have you seen "The Matrix?" It's epic! - So yeah, that's going
back to GCSE IT class or whatever, whatever it was back then. - I had a similar thing where, I also had to make a website
as well for my IT class. You didn't have to do that? - No. - Oh, okay, because I- - I don't even think my teacher
knew how to make a website. Like, I don't think he was gonna teach us. - Because I had to make a website, but it was when I was like 16 years old, so I wasn't 10 years old. And then I was like, "Okay, I gotta think of a cool name for my website. How about The Anime Man?" (laughing) - Wait, does this still exist? - Yeah, it does exist. - What's the domain? - It's theanimeman.wordpress.com 'cause we used WordPress back then. - Did you like, do anime
reviews and all that shit? - Yeah, and that's how I got started. That's how I got started,
and then I was like- - So we can still go on this? - Oh, yeah it should be up there still. - Garnt, pull it up, pull it up. - I went on there like, a year ago because I did a video where
I was just basically roasting my own horrible reviews, and
they were absolutely garbage. - What was your very first review? - Ah, "Serial Experiments Lain." - Oh, that's a Herculean- - Yeah, I wasn't like,
"'Fairy Tail' review! 'One Piece' review!" - Now I feel bad for just
for reviewing "Bleach" for my first video. (laughing) - No, but I gained so much of, I don't know how the fuck
people like, came back. They were like, yeah, dude, I got to the point
where people were like, "I would like to request
a review from you. Can you review this particular series?" And I was like, "Okay." - Were there many anime reviews at that time though, in English? - There were a lot of like, there weren't a lot of people on YouTube who were doing it, but there
were lots and lots of like, anime blogging websites. - Yeah, 'cause that's
probably around 2000s, right? - So yeah, it was probably,
- Yeah, it was like, 2010's, - When blogs actually got
views and everything like that. - Yeah. (laughing) - It was the 2010s, but then,
then it got to the point where someone was like, "Hey, you should uh, you
should do some video reviews." I was like, "Okay." And then I did that, and then- - That was the origin story. - And that's the origin story. - Fucking, dusted off that chopper hat, You were like, "It's time." (laughing) - It's time. - The giant rainbow beanie
as well that I used to wear. - God, it's so hideous. - Did you guys have that one
really cool teacher in school? Like, For me it was the IT teacher. He didn't give a shit about what we did, but every other teacher,
in my school at least, was a fucking asshole, but there was just the one IT teach for me
that was really cool. - I had that uh, that was our physics
teacher in high school. He was such a fucking character, and I don't know if he did it on purpose just to be entertaining
because maybe he thought that not a lot of kids would
take physics as a major, but I took physics as I just
found physics interesting. Imagine this middle-aged,
just completely bald dude and him trying to teach you
about like, how electrons move and he's carrying around this giant stick. Like, I'm talking twice the
size of a cricket bat, right? Just as thick as a cricket bat and in like marker on it, it's
called the gentle persuader. - [Garnt] Oh my god. - And he would just
swing this thing around and whenever there was a kid
who was asleep at his desk, he would just get the gentle persuader and just whack it on the table
to get the kids to wake up. - It's always the physics teachers that are like, the fucking nuttiest. (laughing) They're always either the
most passionate about it- - But the absolute clap of a sound that this thing would make, you could hear it probably
from across the school of just this giant piece of wood clapping against another
giant piece of wood. And the kids after a while,
like after two weeks, no kid would fall would
asleep in his class just 'cause he's just
swinging this thing around. - That's asserting dominance as a teacher. - The dominatrix. - The dominatrix. - Asserting dominatrix right there. (laughing) - No but he was really cool, he made physics really fun for me. And I feel that if I didn't
have him as a teacher, I probably would have
found like, the whole, all the sciences and physics just really fucking tedious and boring. - Yeah, yeah. - I remember the first time I
read "Great Teacher Onizuka", fucking one of my favorite
manga of all time. - So good.
- I haven't read it. - You should.
- Yeah, to give you a synopsis, it's about this teacher who is a 22 year old delinquent. Never finished college, I don't think, or like, was a dropout to college, and basically he takes over
this delinquent classroom and just kind of reforms them. He doesn't teach them the curriculum, he teaches them life lessons. And it's, you know, it's
a pretty simple premise, but what sells it is how
good of a teacher Onizuka is and just, I wish I had a
teacher like that in my own life that was just, you know, Mr. Sullivan, IT teacher,
I'm never gonna forget you, but you know, you were no Onizuka. (laughing) - You ain't Great Teacher Sullivan. - The coolest thing he
did was let us call him by his first name a few times. That's how you know, that's how you know. - That's how you know.
- Damn, bro. - There's a special moment
when you're in your senior year of high school where your teacher's like, "Just call me by my name." And it's like, "Yeah,
all right, all right." - You're the real one, man, you're the real one.
- We're real bros now. (laughing) - We're friends, right? - Yeah, we're friends,
we're friends, right? - My biology teacher was really nice. She was so cool. I did so many dumb stuff
that she had my back. She was, "No, no, no, I got
this," 'cause of other teachers. 'Cause one time when I got
in a fight a different time from the other stories- - Out of a million fights. - She was pregnant and
she was teaching a class. And this guy, So one of the guys, I was
having a fight with him and I fucking rammed him
through her class door, and the door slammed open, absolutely smacked her
whiteboard and stuff and made so much noise. And yeah, she didn't tell me off. She was like, "It's okay, I understand." She was like, "I know
he's a piece of shit." (laughing) - I got you bro, I got you. - This kid drove all the teachers insane. He was the worst bro and
he always got away with it 'cause the teachers just stopped. Like, did you ever have that kid where the teachers just gave up? 'Cause they were like,
"He's such a piece of shit, there's no point even
trying to discipline him." He was that kid. I'm sure you guys know him. - Yeah, I think we all have
that one kid in school. - And then, when my phone
went off in an exam, which is not good, - Which it's just normally an auto fail. - Yeah, so what happened was is that I was super into
Enter Shikari at this age. - Of course you were. - My second name is C on the exam, so I was right at the front always. And I'd turned my phone off, and I didn't realize my
phone could turn itself on to turn the alarm on. - What? - Is that true?
- Some phones could do this, some phones could do- - What kind of sentient shit is that? - So this is back in the day when the phones had the the
batteries you could take out. - Oh, so flip phone, right? - Yeah, so my other friend, I remember distinctly for the exam, he's like, I'm taking the
battery out too, just in case. I'm like that's dumb, I'm
just leaving mine in, man. And then obviously, I was
sitting down in my history exam, and I heard some mumble
in the back and I'm like, "Fucking idiot, whose phone is that? What a fucking loser." I finished the exam comfortably. It kept getting louder
and I was like whatever. And then I go to the back to get, 'cause you put all your bags in the back. - [Garnt] In the back, yeah. - And I'm like, where's my bag? Where the fuck's my bag? And then I was like,
"Fuck, was that my phone? No, no, no, it's not right." I got fucking grilled by
the headmaster who was like, "You're trying to cheat? Trying to cheat?" They were like, you know this alarm, and it was fucking Enter Shikari going (mimics shouting) In fucking whatever room it was while I was doing this two hour exam, so it was in the reception
area they were keeping it. They were like, "You
know it kept going off?" And I'm like, "Alarms
tend to do that, yeah." - Out of every ringtone
you could have chosen, you choose Enter Shikari. - Because that shit woke you up, man. (laughing) - I would never, I've tried putting my favorite song as an alarm. And then you realize after about, - A month,
- You begin to hate the song. - You hate the song. 'Cause I remember in university, I did exactly the same with The Killers or sometimes Muse, and I'm just like, "Well I hate this song now. This is not why I picked the alarm." - It's because this Enter
Shikari song at the time was their most popular and
it just started off with (mimics intense drumbeat) Do you know this one? - Yeah. - And they were just
immediately screaming and, yeah, I remember I was fucking tearing up. I'm like, "No, I'm not trying to cheat!" - I just really like Enter Shikari! - It's just an alarm, bro. And they were like, "Can you prove it?" And I'm like, "It says nine o'clock, man. It's a little alarm bell and everything!" Bear in mind, this school
has 200 kids total. This is a high school with 200 kids. This is a very small school and they have my bag on the
table like at an airport being like, "Open it up. Open it up, what's inside?" - It's like TSA.
- Yeah, literally like it's a bomb, they're like, "Open it up, what's inside bro? What's inside?" And I pull it out, and
it's the phone doing it. And then, yeah, they asked me what was it and can you prove it's an alarm? I show them it's an alarm and
then they're like, "Okay." And then just let me go. - Well imagined if they grilled you, being like, "It's a shit song." (laughing) Enter Shikari? What are you? - I think I stopped listening
to Enter Shikari after that, 'cause I think every time
I got, 'cause bear in mind, as a 16 year old thinking
that you're possibly gonna be kicked out of
exams is traumatic as fuck. I'm like "Fuck, dude,
my mum's gonna kill me. I'm gonna be destroyed for life." But luckily they gave
me a slap on the wrist, although I'm pretty sure
they should've disqualified that exam result, but they didn't. - I purposely chose a song that I knew I was going to hate, because, that just,
especially if it was an alarm to wake me up, because you
can't listen to an alarm of a song that you hate for too long. - Yeah, that's actually really clever. - It further incites me to be like, "I gotta turn this shit off immediately." So I chose fucking "Nyan Cat." (laughing) - No, I like "Nyan Cat." - I did not. - I could not listen to that
for more than five seconds. - And that's exactly why I was like, "This is perfect alarm material", 'cause the moment, imagine 8:00 AM, and you're just having a nice sleep, and then just from
downstairs you just hear (mimics song in high-pitched voice) It's like, shit, I gotta (laughing). - Songs like that help me
get in the zone, though. Like when I'm gaming, it's repetitive. (laughing) - What, "Nyan Cat?" - I could, man. I remember I got four hours in- - It's his is fucking brain, man. It's the fucking brain. - What's the "Dance
till You're Dead" song? You know the one? βͺ Dance till You're Dead βͺ Yeah, the 10 hour compilation. In one gaming session,
I got six hours into the Deku "Dance till You're Dead" thing. - To be fair, that song is sick. I have gone through a few
hours of that 10-hour mix. - That song, when you're gaming, dude, it's like you're in the fucking zone. And then you check over,
you see Deku head banging, you're like, "Nice." - 'Cause that song is
just like audible crack. - You, you just, especially
when you're gaming, - It's hacking your brain, bro. - It just hacks, it just
properly gets you in the zone. "Nyan Cat", on the other hand, is just the complete opposite of that where it's just this really annoying noise that you just can't pinpoint. - Yeah, "Nyan Cat" is like audible heroin. (laughing) It just doesn't do anything for you, it just makes you feel sluggish. - Audible heroin? Does heroin not do anything for you, Joey? What are taking bro?
- It's more just like the more you take, the
more you're just like, "I can't function." - This is obviously coming from an analogy from three people who have
never taken heroin before. - It's like that "Office"
joke where it's like, why do they always talk
about it's like crack? They've never tried crack. (laughing) That's actually one of the few jokes I love from "The Office." - Yeah. (laughing) - I remember one time I was hanging out with Geoff from Mother's Basement. Sorry, Geoff, I'm gonna
call you out for this. But I remember we were, I
think it was an AX party and we were talking about how much, some crazy shit that we've done. And he was talking about, "Oh yeah, it's like
downing a pint of cocaine." I'm like, "Geoff, that's
not you do cocaine." (laughing) It was just the blinking
meme, it was like, Geoff that's not how cocaine is done. You don't down a pint of cocaine. - Have you downed a pint of anything? (laughing) - So yeah, thank you for that, Geoff. I'm definitely gonna be
using that in the future. - And the subreddit's definitely
gonna be using that too, I guarantee it. - It's like downing a pint of cocaine! (laughing) Talking about downing things- - Snorting a line of heroin. (laughing) - To get to the actual topic that we were gonna talk about before we went on this massive tangent, as we always do, I guess we wanted to talk
about food, right guys? - I love food. - I love food, who doesn't love food? - I only exist for the next meal.
- I love consuming things in my mouth. (laughing) That came out really wrong. (laughing) - I'm glad you prefaced where you do it. - Perhaps a pint of cocaine. - I love when a pint of
cocaine is in my mouth. - Yeah, I guess the reason I
wanted to bring this up is, Joey, you recently chose
to become a pescatarian. - Yes, but let me explain- - Pescatarian in inverted commas. - Yes, I didn't decide
to fully transition, because I like meat too
much, but I figured just for about a month, Aki and I were like, "Let's see if we can be pescatarian", because I feel if there's any country that is perfect to be a
pescatarian, it would be Japan. Because pescatarian, if you don't know, means it's basically vegetarian,
but you can also eat fish. - Yeah. Fish aren't animals,
they don't have souls. - Yeah, exactly, that's not real meat, fish aren't real meat. So I figured just as, not so much as a morality thing, but more just to better my diet and just eat a little bit healthier. We were like, "Okay, let's
try and be pescatarian for one month." Because it's gonna be the last, So basically, my last
month of my 25th year is gonna be me as a pescatarian, and then on my 26th birthday
at the end of September, I'm gonna be like, "Give me all the meat!" - Give me every meat!
- Give me everything meat! I don't want to see a piece
of greenery on my plate! - Dude, when I was like,
I feel like was raised where if the meal didn't have
meat in it, it's not a meal. - Yeah, that's, that's how I feel. - Maybe that's a, is that
a British thing maybe? - I don't think so, I think
it's an Asian thing as well. - Yeah. - I remember, still to this day, I cannot get full unless
I have some kind of meat. - Give me a crumb of
chicken, a crumb of chicken. - I do count fish as meat,
but if I just have no meat- - There needs to be
something dead on my plate. (laughing) - No, that's how it is though, I need something dead on my plate, unless like, 'cause I've
tried having vegetarian meals and then I get filled up, and then I get hungry an
hour later, without fail. And I don't know if that's a mental thing where my body's like, bruh. - There's probably some diet expert watching us who can explain. We're just gonna go off
all anecdotal evidence. So don't take anything we say seriously. - Yeah, so basically, yeah, I figured I like fish a lot and Japan is such a seafood-heavy country where you can walk down
the road and get some sushi or go to the supermarket
and buy pre-cooked fish or stuff that, and all of
it tastes so fucking good! - It's also you don't have to
worry about it here, I feel. Like I, dude, Whenever someone ordered
like, oysters or shit in a not-extremely
expensive place in the UK, I'm like bro, all right. - Yeah, oysters are like, you never order oysters unless you trust the place you're ordering oysters from. - Also, if the curry place,
the Indian curry place, don't fuck with shrimp. - That's always a coin
flip, no matter what. - At least in the UK,
that is a fucking gamble unless you have a place, and even if you have a place you're like, "But do they treat the seafood correctly?" They've probably got it- - I need to have seen
this fish die in my face. - I feel like there's
some certain cuisines, like Indian cuisines.
- In the UK especially. - Not just in the UK. In Thailand, especially
street food in Thailand tastes amazing, but would you trust it for like, to pass hygienic tests? Not exactly! But it doesn't stop it from tasting, you take that risk and some
of the dirtiest-looking places taste the best. - Yeah, it's true, it's true. - But it's like at AX when
you're walking down AX and those hotdog stands are there. - Oh yeah. - And they've had these hotdog in this cardboard packaging and it's been out there all fucking day, and then they just
chuck them on the grill. And sure, it looks amazing on the grill, but those have been soggy for eight hours. - Yeah.
- Dude, they smell fucking amazing.
- They do, they smell amazing, But what is it, it's like the
succubuses on all the stories. They look amazing, right? It's too good to be true. Don't, your stomach's gonna hate you. The only people, every
time someone gets sick at a convention, it's always 'cause- - It's always the hotdog!
- It's always the hotdog! - 'Cause they always one of
those things, and I'm like, "Why did you do it?", and they're like, "It just looked so good." (laughing) I couldn't help myself, and it's like, you dumb
fuck, there is a Denny's, there is everything around here. I'm not saying actually- - There's literally
Chick-fil-A down the road. - I say that, but Denny's
is probably a gamble as well in the US, I'll be honest.
- In America, definitely. But I kinda had a similar
thing in the Philippines with street food because, 'cause the one time I
went to the Philippines to go see Aki's family, I was like, there's all this
amazing-looking street food, but I feel if I don't
make the right choice, I'm probably just gonna die on the road. So it's really weird, I did, like get, not food poisoning, but I definitely got some bad diarrhea from one of the street foods, but it was from a mango. - Wow! - Which is weird, you wouldn't expect- - A fruit really do you like that, man? - It was like of all the- - That's just why I wanna eat meat, that's why I wanna eat meat, man. - Yeah, I had fucking
balut that I just bought off a random woman on the street. Balut is a duck fetus. - Oh, dude, that shit looks nasty, bro. - You would think that
that would get me sick, but no, it wasn't the fetus,
it was a fucking mango. (laughing) - I can understand if you've
grown up with food like that, but can you, as an
Australian-Japanese dude, see a fucking bird and just be like, "Yo, fucking that looks
tasty, give me two of those." - Hey man, Aki's dad was like, "Yeah, that shit tastes good." I'm like, "All right, I trust you." And so I bought two. - Is that the weirdest thing you've eaten? - It's probably the weirdest
thing I've eaten, yeah. - I trust people when they say that, but I'm looking at them the whole time like I do not expect anything from this. I'm gonna eat it just to entertain you, but I'm expecting this to taste like shit. - I mean, yeah, I've filmed
a video on it as well. It's on my second channel,
because apparently Aki told me that this is one of the, you
know "Fear Factor", right? - Yeah.
- The American show. Apparently she said that this balut stuff is one of the last foods that
they eat on "Fear Factor." If you can eat this then
you can eat anything. I'm like, but it's just a duck fetus. - I'll eat it, I'm just not
gonna be happy about it. - Yeah, I looked at that
motherfucker dead in the eyes while eating it, so I was like- - Wake up, wake up! - I was like, "Yes, you
are going into my stomach!" - It's like in Japan, they have this at the sushi restaurant,
normally fish restaurants, they have the sperm sack
and this shit is disgusting. - Oh, shirako? - Yeah, dude,
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - And even when you speak
to Japanese, they're like you either just despise
that shit or you love it. - It's an acquired taste.
- It is acquired. - It looks like a brain
that has lost all the water. Like it's fallen apart,
it's all untangled, bro. And then when someone's
like, "Oh, what is it?" Oh, no, just try it, hee-hee. And then you try and like,
oh, it's a sperm sack. - Yeah, with sperm in it. - And it tastes like how you would imagine a sperm sac would taste. - It does feel like you just
got jizzed in the mouth. - It totally does, 'cause I
remember the weirdest thing I would say I'd had was
in China where it's, I was with a friend and their family and I don't know what it is, I don't know if this is an Asian thing, but whenever they see a foreigner trying, they always ordered the most exotic food and then try to get them to try it. My parents do exactly the same and their family did
exactly the same to me. So they were ordering all this weird shit and then they ordered this soup. And they told me, "Oh, try the
soup, it's just beef soup." So I started chowing
down on this beef soup and then I was like, "Mm, this is all right,
this is all right", and then I get to this really chewy parts that I have to really- - I think I know what it is.
- Bite my way through. I'm like, "Oh, what is this?" And it had the most awful
after taste you can imagine, it just stayed in your mouth forever. And then I asked them, "What
the hell was that chewy bit?" And then my friend asked their family and they translate to me, and they said, "Oh no, that's probably
the bull's testicles." (laughing) - Bruh.
- I'm like- "Hold on a second, what is this?" Oh, this is a bull's penis soup. And I'm just like why did
you not lead with that?! - This feels like information I should've been told at
the start of this meal. - They knew exactly what they were doing. They were like, oh, this is
beef soup, this is beef soup, you can have this. - I don't know, I'm one of those
people who would not be mad at that kind of stuff,
just because I want- - Free dick, bro. - I wanna try all the weird shit. Because I know- - I do as well, I do as well. - Yeah, because I know if I
went to a restaurant like that by myself and I looked at the menu and I saw bull's penis,
testicle, bull's penis soup- (laughing) - Oh my god, Joe, that
was a fountain, bro! - Joey's salivating at the thought. (laughing) - Bull, bull, bull penis. - Sorry, that was like let's
just taste this one meat. (laughing) - See, people like that, I'm
like, yeah, order it, order it. I'm gonna look you in the
eye, I'm gonna eat this shit. I want you to know that I'm gonna eat it, and I'm gonna tell you
it tastes like shit. I'm not gonna give you the
satisfaction of going like- - Again, if I saw that on the menu, I probably wouldn't order it myself. - No, you're gonna go for like, - the beef burger.
- There's no way. - Yeah. I'll get something
that I'm familiar with. So I would rather someone
just order me some weird shit and then trick me into eating
it so that could be like, well, I may not- - Anthrax, yeah! (laughing) - It's like, well, I
may not have enjoyed it, but hey, now I can say that
I've eaten bull's testicles. - I don't think I'd be very
happy if someone had been like, "Hey, that's a dick",
and I'm like (sighs). - To be fair, they disguised it very well. - You know, sometimes-
- Is it gay? (laughing) - Am I gay? - It didn't look like a dick 'cause it was all minced up into a ball- - I don't think they
would just chop it off and be like there we go. - It's a full dick. - It's just like a full dick on a plate. Like, what is this? Oh, it's just bull meat. And I'm like, "What kind of bull meat? That looks very much like a testicle." - I think the problem is
with stuff like this for me, and I'm sure a lot people
can relate to this, I don't want my fucking meals to be a fucking adventure
game for someone, dude. I just wanna eat, bro. Sometimes I just wanna enjoy
my meal, have a nice time. - You just wanna skip the story. (laughing) - And not turn it into a
fucking Bear Grylls TV show in the middle of this restaurant. You know what I mean? I hate it when people try and do that, like, try this, try this awful thing. I'm like, "Why would I
try that awful thing? You've just told me it's awful. Why are you trying to make me eat something awful?"
- Oh, no I'm the complete opposite, I will
happily be like, yeah. - Yeah, Joey's that guy in the restaurant who just orders the weirdest shit. - Yeah, you and Aki both do it. We're sitting down, they'll be like, "So who ordered the slime
shit? Who ordered that?" Oh, Aki will go, "Oh, I like that." And I'm like, "That's a
lie, you don't like it. You're just ordering it
to make yourself look like you're fucking Bear
Grylls at this izakaya. Just admit it, okay? Admit
it, no-one likes it." - I love the fact that every
time we get to that moment, every time without fail, you're like, "Do you guys wanna try some?" And every time we just say, "No, Joey, that doesn't look appetizing." - But I want you guys to try it! - So then Joey finishes, what is this goop shit you
always get, what is it? You know the goop- - Oh, takowasa? - Yeah, it's fucking awful. - Yeah, it's like octopus, and wasabi, and you put it in a blender. - I've never seen any Japanese
person order it around me. - What do you mean? I know
plenty of Japanese people who eat it! Why do you think it's a
staple menu at izakaya? - Nah, it's on the bottom dude. (laughing) And then after that,
there's just other fish that I don't know how they prepare it, but it's just got the
consistency of a tire with no taste. - Oh yeah, the fish-
- It's like a toenail. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's
like the toenail thing. (laughing) - It tastes and looks like a toenail. - And it feels a toenail. - It's ray, it's stingray. - Stingray fin, right? - It's the kind of thing where it's like, yeah, sure, when I'm drunk enough, I'll chew on it and
I'll have no complaints. But when it's like I wanna have a meal, why would I fill myself up with something that doesn't taste like anything and takes me 10 minutes to eat and just frustrates me? - You had that the other day, when we went to a
restaurant and I ordered, I ordered tokoroten. You know, the rubbery stuff? - Joey was like, "It's zero calories." And I'm like, "So what
if it's zero calories?" - Well, because you're always on about how many calories does this have? - I'm just thinking sometimes,
in a meal you're like, "All right, I don't wanna kill myself." - My dad described that at
once as eating an eraser. (laughing) - Yeah, it's like that.
- That's pretty much what it looks like. - It's like sometimes when
you hear zero calories, you're like, "Oh, that's gonna taste bad." 'Cause celery has zero calories. I don't know if you've
eaten celery on its own, - Yeah, of course I have, I love celery. - On its own?
- Yeah. - Oh, bro, celery tastes
like shit on its own. - No!
- Yeah, it does taste like shit.
- What the fuck?! - It tastes like paint- - That's not even an acquired taste. - It just tastes like paint
remover in vegetable form. - It's like Brussels sprouts. - No, I love Brussels sprouts.
- I love Brussels sprouts. - Get the fuck out! Brussels sprouts is like F-tier vegetable! Why do people put it on roasts? Everyone's just, it's a massive
lie, it's a massive lie. - I love Brussels sprouts,
man, they're great. - Get rid of those fucking
Brussels sprouts on my roast. - 'Cause they have such a really nice, distinct flavor to them- - Yeah, it tastes awful, it's bitter. I don't know, I don't know, It's just like, anti-umami. - Wait, do you like broccoli? Do you like broccoli? - Broccoli's okay. - But you have to keep in mind, we're talking to someone
who doesn't like ketchup. (laughing) What the fuck? - Okay, before we go into
more in-depth food discussion, Garnt doesn't like condiments, basically. - I just like the way
things are meant to taste. - So barbecue sauce, no?
- No, no. - Ketchup?
- I just, I just like, - No, we're gonna go through
all the condiments here just to make sure.
- Mustard? - Yeah, mustard, no?
- Mustard, if it's not, if it's just like, the beans. - Mayo? You don't like any mayo. - No, I don't like mayo. - Tabasco or anything like that, maybe? - Tabasco, I don't really
see that as a condiment. It's something like if
I need an extra kick to make it more spicy. - So when you eat fries, it's just plain? - Yeah, it's just salt and pepper. - That's so sad. That's so sad
- Just salt and pepper fries. No, that's why I like my thin fries, 'cause it absorbs the spices. - It's just oil. It's
literally just oil, bro. - We said that the other day, 'cause we were talking about how we like the thick cut fries. - I like the thin fries. - Yeah, but then Garnt was like, "Oh, I don't like the thick fries, 'cause I taste the potato." (laughing) I'm like, "Yeah, that's what a chip is!" - No, I want to taste you know, the, (laughing) this is gonna sound so bad, like it's the oil flavor or the salt and all the salt and pepper flavor. If it's too much potato,
you're just eating, it just feels like you're
eating starch with no flavor. - Yeah, but sometimes
if it's done perfectly, that starch is just fluffy and beautiful. - And it works so well when
you put it with ketchup or mayonnaise or whatever you put with chips, right?
- Yeah, when you mix the ketchup and mayo together, you get a nice burger sauce. - Oh, that's a fries
sauce, oh, it's so good. - That makes me gag so bad, man. I fucking hate ketchup and
mayo, like ketchup and mayo- - Go eat your dick, bro. (laughing)
- Go eat your dick. - Ketchup and mayo by themselves are disgusting enough to me, but to mix them together and
they form this pink color, I'm just like, "Get that
shit out of my face, man!" - No, fries sauce is so good! - Can you go into- - I can't be the only one here, I can't be the only fucking one here. - No, I think with this
case, you are the only one. - When you go into any
normal chain in the UK, you can't get it 'cause
called burger sauce. - No, it's called Thousand Island Sauce. - Is it Thousand Island Sauce? - Oh, I love Thousand Island Sauce. - Yeah, but they don't do it
in McDonald's, KFC or wherever. - That's like ranch with ketchup, right? - I think so, but mayo with ketchup mixed it's just burger sauce in the UK. - Oh, yeah, it's called fries sauce in US. - And you can't get it unless you go to those dirty chicken shops in London. You go to them and you gotta
fucking haggle with them just to get the fucking ketchup. They're so stingy bro, they
won't give you anything. And I used to go into
mine all the time, dude, and I felt like I was getting mugged off, 'cause I was the only
white guy in this area and I would always go in like, "Yes, I would like um,
five wings, a burger", and then the people would come in, "Yo, what's up bossman?
I'll have the wings set." And I'm like, "Fuck dude, Jesus Christ." I felt so out of place 'cause I just didn't know how to talk. Do I say bossman to the guy? Can I say bossman? Is that weird? I feel weird going, "Yes,
I'll just take a fry please, and a Tango." - I'll take a fry, bossman. - Yeah, and I just felt bad
when there was 12 year olds fighting in the area next to me and I'm just trying to order the chicken. I'm like, I just want the (mumbling). Can I have burger sauce, please? While the other guys are fucking jumping over the counter to grab it. They would do that, they
would put their hands over the counter and grab the shit. - Really? - Yeah, and the fucking owners- - The fucking audacity. - I know, the audacity of these bitches. - Actually, there is
one sauce that I do like and it's very specific,
but it's peri-peri, or Nando's sauce. But are they in the same category? - That's like a marinade. - I feel like if it's
more on the marinade side of things, I love marinade.
- That's like teriyaki, right? - Yeah, yeah, exactly. - Do you have Nando's in Australia? - Yeah we do, but it's fucking expensive. So no one goes to it. - I fucking I miss Nando's here. I miss it so much. - Cheeky Nando's for the boys. - Yeah, to be fair, I feel UK, I tried Nando's in the UK, and it's infinitely better
than the one in Australia. - People will always chat shit about it, but the thing is, is that it's the perfect in between a fast food
place and a restaurant where sometimes you just want the chicken and you wanna get out. - Right, right. - You also don't wanna feel like shit. - It's one of the few places in the UK that we can be proud of in terms of food, because when you think
of British cuisines, you're like, "Well, what
can we be proud about? Oh yeah, beans on toast." That's British cuisine, right? - What's with British people
getting bullied online all the time now, man? Remember when it used to be
British people were cool. in 2012 and Harry Potter was in full steam and Tumblr loved British people? And then now it's just like,
"Haha, he said Chewsday. He said Chewsday, innit?" - Wa-er - [All] Wa-er, wa-er. - He likes beans on, yes, I like beans on toast, okay? I can eat it as many times
as I need to, goddammit! - There's a limit with me with beans. - Baked beans? Why do you say beans like that? - 'Cause it's a funny word! I love accentuating the B in beans. - I can imagine if I
wasn't born in the UK, I would think baked beans are just like, why would you ever eat baked beans? - Well, 'cause in Australia
we eat baked beans quite often as well. Sometimes I would eat it on toast, sometimes I would just
fucking crack open a can. - Yeah, in university,
I basically lived off just beans in cans and I
would just heat them up and eat them for dinner. - That sounds disgusting to me. - Oh, yeah, it was.
- I wouldn't be able to live off it. - I didn't know how to cook, so I would just boil
pasta and put salt on it and eat the pasta. - I love how the cooking
experience at university is just how many ways can I cook pasta? It's just that. - It took me a year to figure out that you could just pour the pot sauces on top of the pasta. (laughing) Because I was so content and
I didn't wanna look stupid in front of my uni mates, and I remember my mum offered
to teach me how to cook and I was like, "I don't need that. How hard can it be?" - I got this.
- How hard can it be? So yeah, I was eating plain
pasta and beans for a year. - Yeah.
- It's pretty depressing. - Like cup ramen, cup ramen- - Oh, yeah, cup, the first
day of university I went and bought a crate of pot
noodles and lived off them. That was beautiful. - You can't go wrong
with pot noodles, dude. - We should probably get
back onto Japanese food, shouldn't we? - Well, going back to Japanese, recently, funnily enough, I just went to the cup ramen
museum in Yokohama this week, which, the only reason we
went to the cup ramen museum was just because- - It's just there.
- It was just there. I was like, whatever,
it's something to do. But it was actually really
interesting and really fun. It was not someplace I thought to go that would be a fun, exciting place to go, but it was fun to learn about cup ramen. I had no idea that basically, cup ramen exists because of Americans. Because instant noodle was invented in the usual packeted way, and then they tried to sell it to America. And Americans were just
like, "How do we eat this?" Well, you're gonna have
to use a fucking chopstick with bowls, like, that's too inefficient. So they just started putting
it in their soda cans or no, not the soda cans, the soda cups, and just put the ramen
in and put hot water in. And that's how cup ramen was invented! - Oh wow. So cup ramen is an American invention? - Yeah, well it's- - It was invented in Japan,
the method of doing it with the noodles- - Yeah, but it was when they tried to sell it to Americans that
he saw Americans doing that, and he was like, "Let's just
put it in the fucking cup." So, thank you, America, for cup ramen. - Yeah, and if you're in prison, it's your currency. - Cup ramen currency.
- So you don't want Vox video, it's actually currency in
most prisons, that's so funny. - But yeah, in terms of Japanese food, what are some Japanese
food you want more people to know about or that you have discovered since moving to Japan that maybe
not many people know about? - Well, you know my answer, right? - I already know your answer, we've talked about this before. Go on, Joey. Simp for your dish. - I'm simping for a little
dish called tsukemen. It's not ramen, it's tsukemen. So basically, tsukemen, oversimplified. Think of ramen but separate
the noodles from the broth and make that broth thick as a bitch. - I will say when I first- (laughing) When I was first, I saw it
on the menu, I was like, "Why the fuck would I want my noodles separated from the broth?" That sounds like it's
demarinating the noodles. - Yeah, an extra step. - Yeah, it sounded like it was just making the noodles less flavorful. - It just didn't make any logical sense. - But somehow, it makes the
noodles even more flavorful when you dip them into
this and you basically have the broth on the noodles (mumbling). - Because the thing with ramen broth is that it's very liquidy
because the noodle - It's so diluted.
- is gonna be sitting in this broth for a long, long time. - And you can drink it. - And you can drink it. But tsukemen broths, they
have to make it thick, because when you put the noodles in and then you take it
out again, as you said, the broth has to stick to the noodles. And that shit is, the flavor of that is so fucking powerful. - And then when you're
done eating the noodles you can pour a soup into
the broth to dilute it to make it drinkable. - It's basically like concentrated ramen. That's basically the first time, but I don't know, because I
feel no matter what we say or how much we try to sell it, you can't sell it in words. - Because it just doesn't
look as pretty as ramen. Ramen is so pretty. - And you explain it logically,
and you're just like, that just sounds like
ramen with extra steps. What makes it so amazing?
- That's exactly what you guys said when I tried to sell it
to you guys, and I was like, "Trust me, let's go to one of
my favorite tsukemen places in Ikebukuro and you can
just eat it and tell me." And I took them- - And I remember we were chatting
the biggest, maddest shit. We were like, "Sure Joey, sure, whatever." And then we got the dish
and we just sat there in silence for a good 10 minutes as we were just eating this. And I remember the second
place you took me to, I swear, I had an existential
crisis eating the tsukemen. I remember you both were eating, you were just staring at me, and I was just looking at his bowl of, I was just eating this bowl
of tsukemen being just like... - [Connor] It's perfect. - It's perfect. I'll tell you what it felt like, it felt like that meme
in "Ratatouille" where, (laughing) where I had one bite
and it just took me back to my childhood or something like that. I was having a flashback to
this dish grandma made me. My grandma's never made me tsukemen, but it gave me that same homely feeling that I had when eating a home
cooked meal, back as a kid. And I was like, "What
is happening right now?" - I've never seen anyone
have a "Food Wars" moment in real life, but that was legitimately the closest I've ever seen to- - I was this close to fucking crying. (laughing) - I remember I stopped to, 'cause you were sitting
opposite me and I was eating, and I looked over and you were kinda just silently staring at it. And I remember I said to him, like, "Are your eyes watering? Are you really about to cry over this bowl of tsukemen?" (laughing) - That, that is uh, that definitely did. - Meanwhile, I was just there in my mind like fucking Tyler Wall, like "Yes!" Just fucking eating it. - And then I remember the next day, we were talking about whatever the fuck we were talking about,
and Garnt just texted, fully serious, being like, "I had a dream about
that tsukemen last night. I actually had a dream
about that tsukemen, because it's that fucking good." - As well because they have the meat and all the veg in the broth, when you bite into the veg or the meat, they've absorbed this intense
broth and it just bursts, and it's so fucking good.
- And the meat is so soft and just breaks apart.
- Yeah, it's so tender, so tender. - Honestly, I'm not
gonna say that the ramen in Japan is bad or anything, there's some fucking
fantastic ramen out there. But I just feel that
tsukemen is such an underdog because people just, as you say, people just think that it's
just an inferior ramen. - Yeah, I mean, that's what I thought and I didn't even know about
tsukemen until I moved here and you told me about it. And I feel like people only come here and they only know ramen. Because when I came here,
I only knew ramen as well. - I totally don't blame
people who are like "Oh yeah, I just wanna eat sushi and I just wanna eat ramen." But it just frustrates me when there's, you go to a ramen shop,
and they usually have tsukemen on the menu as well. And yet they just completely ignore that and just go for the basic veg ramen. - Yeah, and I feel like you do
get a better ramen experience here than you do anywhere
else in the world. - It just frustrates me
when people are like, "I'm gonna go to Ichiran Ramen", and it's like, you can
have an Ichiran in America! Why did you fly all the way to Japan to have something you can have in America? - I do not understand
why people come to Japan and they try, what's the curry place? - CoCo curry.
- Is it CoCo curry that's like the international one? - Yeah, yeah.
- Yeah, CoCo Ichiban. - I don't know why they come here and just try the CoCo curry here. - In defense of both those chains, I'll be devil's advocate, I went to Ichiran Ramen maybe a month ago. I thought it was pretty fucking good. I thought it was like- - It's not bad. It's just mid. (laughing) It is. - If you don't live here, right? And you don't wanna fuck around with going down these alleyways,
looking on Google Maps trying to find shit, I can
understand where you're like, "I want a good ramen that delivers, and I don't have to talk to anyone. They have an English menu." I get that, 'cause sometimes
these ramen places, bro, no pictures, only Kanji. You've gotta give your ticket to the guy, you've gotta hope that he calls you out and you know that it's you, right? It's a little, you know, you know- - You've gotta figure
out if he's asking you if you want extra veg or whatever. - 'Cause you hand it to
him and he'll ask what size and you'll be like, what? (laughing) Or, do you want rice? Rice they ask some and sometimes, and 'cause the word for rice
and meal is the same, gohan- - Gohan.
- And so one time they asked me "Gohan?", I just completely forgot that it was rice. And I'm like, "Yeah, I want a meal, I just gave you my tickets you dumb fuck. Take my ticket!" - Yeah, I know that's Goku's son. (laughing drowns out speaker) - Yeah, so I get it with Ichiran Ramen. Okay, it was a little expensive though. I'll give you that. - It is. - The, the noodles were
thin though, it was good. I wanna start a series where I go around reviewing ramen chains. - Yeah, but that's the
problem I have with Ichiran is that it is the thin noodles, and I don't have a problem
with the thin noodles but I like my noodles
like I like my women. I like them thick. (laughing) - I was wondering where
you're going with that. - Joey's like the inappropriate uncle that has to mention something
sexual every 10 seconds. - Of course! It's the only way people relate to me. (laughing) But yeah, that's what I
love about tsukemen though, is that those noodles
are so fucking thick. - So there's, so there's like, okay- - But I remember the first
place you took me to. It was like trying to go to
an all-you-can-eat buffet with this one little noodle dish, 'cause it was so thick. - [Joey] Yeah, yeah. - I remember I saw you guys finishing it and I wasn't even halfway through. I'm like (slurps) I can do more, I can do this, guys. - I can't take all the thickness. - With tsukemen, you cannot pause. You have to keep going. If you stop for a moment, you
will think, "Shit, I'm full." - You can't let your brain catch up to your stomach.
- No, don't let it. - It was like doing the
big bang burger challenge in Persona 5, do you know what I mean? That was kind of what I felt like. I got what the main character felt.
- You didn't have enough determination points, man.
- No, I didn't. I needed to upgrade more points. - Weak. Okay, in Japan there's what,
three main types of noodles? There's the soba noodles,
the udon, and the ramen. Okay, and the difference
between these are the soba ones are typically healthy, quite thin. - Soba is buckwheat. - Buckwheat, so quite healthy for you. - It's definitely the healthiest, yes. - Is ramen the least healthy for you? - Ramen? I mean, I don't know. - There's a lot of calories in ramen.
- Yeah, ramen I'd say is probably the least, the most unhealthy. - And there's udon, so ramen's
kinda like in the middle. Soba's really thin. It tastes healthy, so make
of that what you want. And then udon is the
real fucking thick boy. - The thick white one. - Why does soba taste healthy? I don't understand. - Because it is healthy. - I know it is, but I'm just like, what is the big difference
between soba and ramen? I'm trying to put it into words now. - I think it's maybe
because a lot of soba dishes aren't sitting in this very oily broth.
- Soba doesn't hit back, bro. Soba just goes down. Ramen fights you as it's
going down your stomach, bro. It's a challenge, you gotta
beat that shit in your stomach. (laughing) Also, I've noticed- - Ramen is soba with attitude. - Yeah, it's soba with attitude. - I think because ramen
is so heavy in calories, even the shitty cup ramen's
taste fucking good here but if you go and get
the supermarket soba, that shit tastes awful. - Yeah, it does. - It tastes really bad. - You need to go to a good soba place to really appreciate it.
- Yes, soba restaurants are amazing! - This video is sponsored
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link in the description below and thank you to Grand Summoners for sponsoring today's episode. - Back to the video. So yeah, in soba restaurants, they give you the choice
of cold soba and hot soba. And as someone who's grown up with noodles my entire life, I've grown up with the idea that you have to have noodles as a hot dish. 'Cause I don't know, is
it weird for you guys, especially you, Connor, the
idea of eating a cold main dish? - If there's options,
I'm always gonna go hot. I went out the other day and it was, this is from two weeks
ago I went to a place and the AC wasn't working, it
was 35 degrees, feels like 40, the person asked me, "Do
you want hot or cold?" I was like, hot. No one else in this restaurant- - The absolute mad lad! - No one else in this restaurant had hot. I could easily see that,
'cause it comes in a bowl when it's hot and when
you get the cold it's on this little bamboo thing. And dude, I'm sweating my
ass off in this restaurant but still, I was like,
"I'm glad I got hot." - Hot soba has its place though. - I remember when I first moved here, I was like hot soba,
hot soba, only hot soba. And then I tried cold once and I'm like, "Oh, this is really refreshing." It tastes so totally different, but it still gives me a good feeling - I've had it cold, it's not bad. To me, cold thing, cold
noodles don't feel like a meal. It feels like a leftover. (laughing) You know what I mean? Hot noodles feel like a meal. - I kinda get what you're saying, but its' also very monkey brain. - It feels like you
found it in your fridge and you're like, (sighs)
"Okay, let's eat it." - Right? Is the logic then that
you can't be bothered to eat it after that? - When you order cold or hot soba as well, so when you get hot soba,
you just get the noodles and the broth that it comes in, but I always feel jealous
of the cold people who get the little dipping sauce. - Yeah, so with the cold soba, you have a tiny little bowl. - What is the sauce? - It's like a shoyu base. - I thought so, like a
soy, and it's really good. - It's not a broth, it's just
like a sauce, and then you- - You dip it in.
- You take out the soba, you just dip it in,
whip some wasabi in it, and then you just- - Yeah, cold soba is just
the tsukemen of hot soba. (laughing) - No! - It is just the tsukemen, oh my god! Oh my god. - And that further proves my point that tsukemen is superior! - Figured it out. - I just wanna, and then
there's the final noodle which is udon, my least favorite. - I do not like udon. - I really like udon. - It genuinely feels like you're in a tentacle hentai every
time you're eating that shit, 'cause you gotta, dude, you
can have two in your mouth and you're like (gags), trying
to force that shit down. It's awful, you can't, it's so heavy, it's like swallowing a brick, bro. - No, it's not that bad. - It is.
- It feels like the vanilla of the noodle world where it just, it hit the same every time. What can I say, man? - And also because ramen
is somewhat thin, right, the sauce that it takes
on to the ratio of noodle that I'm eating is perfect. Udon, it's this thick in my mind. That's how thick it feels. It's like a coating of sauce. I can't get into that. - But here's the question though? Do you guys like mochi? - Yeah, I like mochi.
- Yeah, I like mochi. - And I'm not talking about fucking mochi ice-cream bullshit,
I'm talking about- - No, no, no,
- Yeah, like actual mochi. Okay, because it's like,
I feel a lot of people who don't like udon are the
same people who don't like mochi for the exact reason. Because when you eat a block of mochi, that's like eating a brick, and it's hard to get that shit down. Udon is just like the noodle equivalent. - Yeah, but I like that
because it's kinda like a sweet a lot of the times. I like mochi sweets, 'cause- - Oh, so you've never
had savory mochi, then? - I've had savory mochi. - Okay.
- I probably wouldn't like it. - It was very like... Fucking like a brick, but I was prepared for it to be a brick. 'Cause it's still dessert, right? So, I was different, but when we went to that
soba place a while ago, oh, no, udon place, sorry; it was like we had this broth and the udon just didn't
stick any of the broth to it. And I'm like, what's the fucking point? - Well, because it's
supposed to be a light taste. It's supposed to be a
really thin, flavorful, umami taste.
- Nah, dude, it aint it, it aint it. - I don't wanna say it's an acquired, I didn't think udon was
gonna be an acquired taste. - Do you think udon is
the worst of the three? - I don't know. I feel like I like soba and udon equally. But ramen, or rather tsukemen
is definitely above the two. But I like udon. I'm not gonna opt for
udon every single time, but if I went to an udon place, I'm not gonna fucking complain. - If I had the choice, I would never go to the udon place. I would always be more in
the mood for soba or ramen. There would never be point where, udon's where I go to where
there's no other places around. I'm like, "I guess I'll settle for udon." - There are just some
winter days where I'm like "Man, I could really go for a hot udon." - I really just want
bricks in my stomach, dude. I just want warm bricks in my stomach with the sauce not sticking to it. - But then you drink the soup afterwards. - Yeah, but sometimes it's too rich then, you know what I mean? Like, come on. - No, no, no, udon broths are never rich. It's always really watery.
- They're way too light, which is what I don't like about it. It's a thick noodle with a light broth. - I like my ramen and tsukemen that have a really thick flavor. It just completely sticks
to you no matter what, but some days I'm just like, I don't wanna feel like I'm getting all this sticky flavor on me. Sometimes I just wanna get
something down that'll warm me up and is nice and light and will fill me up, but won't make me feel like shit. - Yeah, yeah. - Because sometimes when you have, as much as I love tsukemen,
it's like Five Guys, right? It's like, man, this
flavor is so powerful, it sticks to me the entire time, but then the moment it starts to settle in your stomach, you're
just like "Kill me!" - Five Guys is that thing
where you're just like, "I'm out for the count
for the rest of the day. Don't talk to me, don't
expect me to do anything." - I never thought food could knock you out until I had Five Guys. - The opposite of that I
feel is sushi and sashimi. I also had no fucking
clue what sashimi was until I first came here. - A lot of people don't.
- Seriously? - No, seriously. - A lot of people don't. - 'Cause I didn't know
if there was a choice where you could just get rid of the rice. (laughing) I guess it's like a
steak without the sides. Like you could just have a steak, and I thought, oh, I mean, yeah, I guess. I will admit, I wanted to be that guy who immediately loved sashimi
and sushi and was like, "Dude, I fucking love this." But it took me a while to get used to it and really get into it and
appreciate the taste of it. Because when I first
had sashimi, I'm like, "Yeah, it doesn't taste good." - Really? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - It was definitely
something that grew on me, 'cause I remember I went most
of my childhood hating sushi and hating sashimi 'cause I was like "Raw fish? Why do I wanna eat raw stuff?" - And in the UK, they
do that shit dirty, bro. Your sushi sucks dick. (laughing) - True.
- Fucking awful. - I had this one day where I just, for some reason I was like, "Man, that kinda looks appetizing. Let me, let me give that shot." And then after the first
time when I was an adult and I tried sushi again I was like, "I fucking love this shit." I love the taste of raw
fish, tastes amazing. And having sushi in
Japan is just the quality of the fish is just so damn good that even if you go to
one of those dollar places where you can order a small
plate of sushi for a dollar, that still tastes way better than some of the best restaurants
that you can find in the UK or something like that. - Yeah, it's true. I mean, the quality of like, because most of the fish that they serve, we obviously don't have in the UK, but even when you get
the salmon, you're like, "Holy shit, I didn't know salmon could just fall apart like
this when you bite into it." Normally in the UK, you know,
you get something salmon, you gotta fucking tug away. - You gotta Bear Grylls that shit. - I've had salmon where
I'm literally fucking, trying to sever it. But in Japan, you eat it
and it just falls apart, and it works so good with the rice, But man, if I ever have a workout, sushi is what I'm always craving. It's the best post-workout meal, I think. - Really? - 'Cause it's like it's
just filling enough where it's like I don't wanna go too hard, but so healthy and so good for you, You're like, "Man, I really,
I feel healthy doing this." - But I remember you were once saying that you can't have sushi for dinner. Which is weird because
I'll take any excuse to take sushi for dinner.
- Yeah, same here, same here. - Yeah, whenever these guys
when we're out, they're like, "You guys wanna get sushi for dinner?" I'm like- - No, no, it's always "What
do you guys wanna eat?" And Connor's like, "I'm easy." And I go, "Do you feel like sushi?" - No sushi.
- No, no don't want sushi. - Then you're not easy.
(laughing) - You are not!
- That is not easy! - That was a fucking lie! - It's like, okay, I'm easy. If you wanna go to sushi, we'll go sushi. I'm just gonna be like,
"It's not it, chief." - Well, then we don't wanna
do that to you, right? - For dinner, 'cause
for dinner I feel like, okay, sushi is great, don't get me wrong. But for lunch, I don't
mind having one flavor. But for sushi I feel
like 'cause it all tastes like fish still at the end of the day; yes, the fish are different
and they taste different, but it still feels I'm
just eating fish and rice Which is fine, but for some
reason it's sushi to me, it doesn't feel like a full meal. - But you know you can get- - Other stuff, I know. But like, when you order fried
chicken at a sushi place, that shit is so fucking awful. It's like the fucking chicken
has been abused and beaten up. It's all muscular and shit, like it's been in a fucking
fight club before it was killed. You maybe get one ounce of chicken breast and the rest is this
black bone with veins. You're like, "Holy shit, what
did they do to this chicken?" And then you're like, what's the point? - It's like 'roided up chicken. - Yeah, yeah, and I'm
hitting up the miso soup like no tomorrow and I'm stocking up on it 'cause it's normally free. Not that I care, I mean, it
just normally tastes amazing. 'Cause sometimes they leave
some of the fish in there and they let it cook and
it's so fucking good. But I don't know, it doesn't
feel like a proper meal. I don't know why, 'cause
I fill up so fast on sushi and then 30 minutes later
when I've left the restaurant, I'm like, "Shit, I'm hungry again." - Yeah, I get that with
sushi as well sometimes where you feel like your
stomach's about to explode, then somehow, an hour or two later, you don't get hungry. You just like, you get, you get peckish. I can eat a little more,
I can eat a little more. - I think it's just the rice that expands in your stomach.
- Probably, probably. - And then once it finally settles down, you're just like, "Oh, all
right, time for more food." - Yeah. - I don't know. I never
understood why you can eat sushi for lunch, and yet you can't eat sushi for dinner.
- Breakfast, lunch. I mean, normally- - You can eat it for breakfast! - Yeah. Normally my lunch or breakfast is sushi. - See, I can't eat sushi for breakfast. - Why not?
- I can't eat sushi for breakfast. - I can't eat fish for breakfast. - Why? - It's just weird. - But why is it weird? - You're Japanese, bro! - I know. (laughing)
I know. - Can we talk about
the Japanese breakfast? Not just the Japanese breakfast, very specifically, the- - Ryokan breakfast. - Ryokan breakfast.
- But that is the traditional Japanese breakfast. - That is the traditional
Japanese breakfast. - My first time hearing
this was Chris Broad saying, "Don't ever ask for the Japanese breakfast 'cause it's shit." And I thought, oh, he's just
being pessimistic Chris. I was a fool, I should've
listened to you, Chris. It's fucking garbage! Okay, it's not. No, I think the problem is that it's the complete
opposite of garbage. It's too much, it's too good. - It's, there's like, you get about 50 different
dishes, I swear to god, And I'm just like, "Dude, it's breakfast. Just give me a bowl of the cereal." - It's like a worthy contender
with an American breakfast. Where it's just like
that's just too much food. - It's actually even more
than the American breakfast. - It's way more than
an American breakfast! Yeah, because there's,
with an American breakfast, you can fit everything on
one fucking plate, at least. With Japanese breakfast, you have like- - It covers like- - It covers this entire table. (laughing) And then as you're eating,
they bring out more dishes, more small dishes in between the fish, the tofu, the soup, the,
I can't even name it all. - There'll be like a
salad, there'll be a potato that's been marinated in
a different fucking way, I don't know. There'll be two different types of salad, probably a plate of
just single tiny things that you have no idea what the they are. They're probably gonna be radish, 'cause everything seems to be radish. Like everything is a fucking
radish in these ryokans! - Every time I see a Japanese
breakfast in front of me, I'm like, "Why am I
eating an art exhibition?" That's just what it feels like. It just like this looks really pretty. It looks really pretty, but man, for one, I've never finished
a Japanese breakfast- - And then rice as well,
they give you rice. - Of course, yeah, they give you rice. This is like a five course meal that I'm having just as I've woken up, and I've never, ever
finished Japanese breakfast. - Yeah. I don't mind the fish, the cooked mackerel that they normally bring
you, I don't mind that. Mackerel doesn't really
taste like anything. - I don't know about that one. - I disagree about that. Mackerel has probably the most taste- - It's my favorite fish, mackerel, but it's just so clean. You never get any like, there's no aftertaste to mackerel, it's just a pure, it's like the chicken. - No, I get an after taste with mackerel. - Mackerel is the chicken of fish. - No, that's salmon. - That's salmon.
- Salmon! - No! - Salmon is the chicken of fish! - Salmon's the pork, salmon's the pork. - You can do so much with salmon, and people do do so.
- And that's why it's the pork! - No, that's the chicken! That's the chicken. - Mackerel's just salmon with attitude. (laughing) - Oh, I'm just recalling
all the food items they might make you. They'd probably give you eggs, but then you'd probably want fried egg, scrambled eggs, maybe a poached egg. They give you some fucking egg roll that's been rolled up and
steamed, and I'm like- - Oh, tamagoyaki? - Yeah, and it's fucking cold. And I'm like, "Why is it cold?! Give me a hot egg, please!" - Most of the dishes are actually cold. - They're all cold, and I don't
know if it's a Western thing but I want something hot to wake me up, and the worst part is you're
eating this and you're like, yeah, it's filling and
something's missing. Can I have coffee, perhaps? Do they have an espresso
machine back there, please? I bring my own pods, I don't care. Just give me a fucking coffee, please! - Well, that's what the green tea's for, it's the hot green tea. That's the hot, that's the
only heat you're gonna get out of a Japanese breakfast, Or the miso soup. - I would kill for a coffee, man, and even when we're here
with Japanese friends, sometimes they're like,
"Man, I just want a coffee." - Japanese breakfasts are way
too extra for my own liking. - [Connor And Joey] Yeah. Yeah. - But, I mean, I guess that's why it's a very infrequent occurrence. It's that special thing that you get - It's for the ryokans.
- At a ryokan. - If you go to a hotel, it's gonna be the shitty
continental breakfast that you reluctantly eat 'cause you don't have
really got much choice. Oh my god, those are depressing. - I dunno, I like that
for the first two days. 'Cause, I don't know, it's
just a recognizable meal and you have it for
two days and afterwards you're just like, "Okay, this
is getting really boring now and I want something different." - Yeah. - But it's like one Japanese dish that, I don't really not recommend it but I don't really recommend it either, is when people come here
and they try the curry. Because I don't know about you, but no matter where I've had curry whether it's home cooked,
abroad, whatever chain, it all tastes as good as each other. Like, I've never had a bad curry, but I've never had a curry
that just blows me away. - Yeah, I can agree with that. - Every single time I
have a curry I'm like, "This would be great if
it was an Indian curry." An Indian curry could do this better and it would taste better. It's just, it's too one noted, right? - Yeah.
- And they put curry in so much fucking things here. There's so many side dishes, like the one place we had ramen and the side dish was
just curry with rice. - Oh, yeah!
- It's like why? Why is this a side? - Because curry goes with everything. That's their logic, they're like, "curry goes with everything!" Everyone likes curry. You'll be happy to eat it, right? - Okay, are you talking
shit about CoCo Ichiban? I do like CoCo Ichiban, because
I know what I'm gonna get. It's like such a sterilized process. - It is, you get the
same thing every time, and it really is no different whether you have CoCo
Ichiban abroad or here. - I've never had it
abroad, so I can't comment. - I had it in America, I've had it in- - Is it the exact same? - It's the exact same. - Okay, it's one of the only
places where I can get spice that actually makes me feel alive, bro. - Yeah, except you
choose the level of spice that is YouTuber material. - I dunno if this is the same abroad, but in CoCo Ichiban here, you can choose the spice
level of the curry, and 10, as a certified Thai
man who loves Thai food and spicy food, it is
fucking insanely spicy. - Yeah, it's a lot. - Except you willingly are like, "Yes, I will have the 10",
and every time we've gone to CoCo Ichiban together and you say, yes, I'll have a level 10- - Do you? - Yeah, they're like blinking me. Are you, sure, 10? That's the spiciest. And you're like yeah. - But one thing I don't
like about the spice level in CoCo Ichiban is it
feels like fake spice. I dunno, like there, - It tastes real. - I don't know, when I was having it- - I'm crying there, so I mean, are those fake tears, Garnt? - What I mean by fake spice
is that it just feels like- - It's added, it's artificial,
- It's just artificial spice, it's not truly a dish that
was meant to be spicy. Like, you have an Indian curry or you have a Thai dish
and you remove the spice, you feel like it's missing something. - Okay, I think that in a
normal CoCo Ichiban spice, it's mainly a throat thing. But in a normal curry, it's
a whole mouth meltdown. Those chilies get all over. - Yeah.
- Yeah, CoCo Ichiban it's just like my throat is on fire. I love pain when I'm eating. - I love pain when I'm
eating things as well. - People are like, "Oh,
it ruins the flavor!" No, you don't understand. When you're like, in severe pain, - It's euphoric, it's euphoric, it is. Oh my god. - The pain makes the flavor
so much more prominent. - It's like a different
kind of pervert, isn't this? - Yeah, it is! - I love the pain, so
I don't understand it. - I know it's not an
attractive thing to be around, it's not something you do
on a date or something. 'Cause I'm there and I'm
like fucking (sniffles). So tasteful. - I remember the very first
time I felt euphoric from spice, and it's on camera. If you watch my Domestic Girlfriend video where I eat a ghost pepper, there's there's a point in there where I'm explaining it,
I'm trying to be a YouTuber, explaining it in a funny way, and then there's a point
where I'm just lying there for a good few seconds,
and I'm just like (gasps). (laughing) And at that point, my brain
was just rushed with endorphins and I was literally high at that point that literally, I couldn't think. 'Cause it was painful, but it
was a good kind of painful. It's so difficult to explain. - It was like downing a
pint of cocaine, right? (laughing) - Yes, that's exactly what it was like! - I don't know, it's so, I don't know, is it euphoric.
- I don't understand it. I don't understand it at all. - 'Cause you freak out when you, 'cause Joey will try, he'll be like, "Okay I'll try it, I'll try it." He'll put an inch on
his spoon, he'll try it and he's like (coughing). - I just don't like, like, - When you stop freaking out and just accept it, it's so nice. - Okay, but to be fair
I used to not be able to handle spice at all. So if we're talking Coco
Ichiban levels of curry, 'cause I feel that's the
easiest way to quantify it, I would always used to just
pick zero, like no spice. - Lemon and herb Nando's sauce. (laughing) The real- - What dressing would you like? Water? - Yeah, water, please. But yeah, I used to be
just zero spice at all, but then the more I would try to, the more, because I will always be that one guy who'd be like,
"Oh yeah, I'll try this thing that I'm probably gonna hate" and spicy stuff was always one of them. I'm like, yeah, I know I'm
probably gonna die from this, but I'll just eat it because why not? And spicy stuff, I
think that's how I built my spice tolerance now, so now I can do a level two Coco Ichi and be like- - Real man shit now! - And be like, "All right,
I can still eat this and enjoy it." But I've once tried a level
three, I was like, no, this is to the point where the spiciness and the pain just completely
negates all flavors for me. - 'Cause for me, moving to
Japan, the one thing I miss the most is spicy food.
- Spice, spice man, - Because you get a CoCo Ichiban 10 because you can't get any
other spicy food anywhere, 'cause wasabi? - They have hot on the
menu and it's never hot. - It's never hot.
- It's hot for me. (laughing) - Okay, go on wasabi, I have
a whole rant about wasabi. - Yeah, wasabi is the closest
thing you get to spice, but it's a totally different feeling. - It's in the nose.
- 'Cause it's the spice in the nose, and I really
like that feeling, I do, but it's just not the same
as the burning sensation, the burning, tingling sensation around your mouth.
- Yeah, whereas normal spice is pleasant, I feel like
eating too much wasabi is like you're in a fucking trench in World War II and the chlorine gas has just landed. Do you know what I mean? You do feel like you're being gassed. It's not spicy or like, "Ooh, it tingles." It's like (coughs) (screams) - See, it's so weird because I can't do a level three CoCo
Ichi, but I love wasabi. - I think people saying
wasabi is spicy is wrong. I feel like it is suffocating. - It's not spicy, it's just, painful.
- It's disgusting. Yeah, it's p- (laughing) A tiny bit, a tiny bit
mixed in with the soy sauce, okay. We're good. - Yeah. - But the moment you put
a little bit too much on your sushi- - Oh no, I love just dumping
a whole load of wasabi into my soy sauce. - I've stopped putting
wasabi in the soy sauce, and now sometimes, if I'm having a mid sushi,
- Right up the nose. I'm just like ball of wasabi
on the sushi, let's fucking go. Yeah. - Fucking animals. - I take that directly now. I don't need it diluted by soy sauce. - Next "Trash Taste" in the
veins, directly in the veins. Brings his the needle to the restaurant and heats up the spoon. - It's like downing a pint of cocaine. Let's go. (laughing) - You know how I became to like spice? 'Cause obviously if you haven't
noticed guys, I'm white. - Yeah, I can see that. - It might not be a
surprise to some of you. I'm very white and my mum
cannot handle any spice at all. My mum will have like, something that has actually zero spice in it and she'll be at the dinner table like, "Oh, it's kind of spicy, isn't it?" Mum, it's paprika. It's paprika, mum! It's not spicy, It's paprika, for fuck's
sake, it's a spice! - Yeah, this water's a little spicy. (laughing) - So naturally, I was never
raised with spicy food ever. And what ended up happening was is that I started doing those
fucking YouTuber challenges. I would start with a ghost pepper 'cause I saw Rhett and
Link do it when I was 15. And I was like, "I want a
ghost pepper, that sounds fun." So we started doing it in school. We'd all do it. - You ate a ghost pepper at school? - Yeah, yeah. - Oh wow. - You could buy it at the
Tesco's and bring it in, so we used to buy them
and just (chuckling) I guess torture each other. (laughing) And so I got into it, and then when I started doing live streams I kept making donation goals, I'll eat a Carolina Reaper, which is, is it still the world's hottest one? - Probably isn't,
- Probably someone's made some giga chad pepper.
- Yeah, this is spiciest one now. - Some abomination that's just pure gas. But I must've done it
seven or eight times, and by the end of doing it, 'cause every single 24 hour stream, I would at least do it twice. And so I started just being like, okay, it's actually kinda fun now. I would actually look forward to doing it. And so then I noticed after doing that where it was just pure pain, when I went back to eating
normal curry, I was like- - You can't go back.
- There's no spice, there's no spice. Once you hit that spice level
- it's 'cause you're desensitizing yourself to it, yeah. - This is how people get into dominatrix. (laughing) (speakers talking over one another) - It hurts at first, but it's kinda starting to feel good now. - It's literally like drugs. (laughing) - It is drugs! - It is a drug, spice is a drug! - 'Cause I remember when I
first started dating Sidney, she could not handle spice at all, And I remember what got
her to start liking spice was basically when I
introduced her to my parents and every time we'd have a family meal, mum would be like, "Oh, I didn't
make it so spicy for you." But in Thai, what less spice means is just they take one chili out of the fucking the 50
they put in this curry. That's what less spicy means. You've had the exact same experience. - It was when we stayed
over at Garnt's place, 'cause Aki can't take spice at all. And she was like, "Oh no, I'm gonna die." 'Cause your mom was making
Thai noodles or something, which is usually hella spicy, I had to make a really weird
request to your mom to be like, "Can you just take all the spice out?" And she-
(laughing) the way your mum looked at me, it was like I was
speaking another language. She was like, "What? No,
that doesn't make any sense." - Like, can you take all the spice out? Oh, okay, so you want one less chili? - No, no.
- No, all, all chili's gone. - It just does not compute. And she's like "This is the first time I'm ever doing this for anybody." I felt like I offended the
Thai people by saying that. - She was just confused,
'cause she was like, "What do you mean no spice?" Less spice? More less spice? (laughing) Like, what does no spice mean? That does not make sense to me. And so, because Sydney would always have to eat this Thai food, at first she was crying every meal. And then, as the more she ate,
the more she got used to it, and then now she can handle spice better than a lot of Thai people. We have this dish called
in Thailand called pakimao, which translates to drunken noodle. And the reason it's called drunken noodle is that you have to be truly pissed to be able to handle the
spice, how much spice this has. And she eats that on the daily, man. - See, because I'm sure that if I was put in the same position as you or Sydney, I would probably get used to it too. - Yeah. - But I don't want to! I wanna enjoy my meals.
- It's good, man, it's good! Get some spice in your
life, it makes the meal, it gives this extra kick to the meal that you just can't get. - But that's the problem, is that because I grew
up eating Japanese food, there isn't any Japanese dishes
that have spice like that. Because wasabi is, as we've established, a completely different type of spice, and we don't really use chilies
in a lot of Japanese food. So there isn't, I
guarantee there's probably a lot of Japanese people who can just not handle spice whatsoever. - Oh yeah, I definitely feel that as well. - Should we open the wine? - Before we move on guys, we've had this bottle of
wine just sitting down that we were going to open this podcast, because we've hit a new
milestone, of course. - We've hit three milestones, technically. - Yeah, three milestones at
almost the same time, right? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - So we reached 100-
- Wait, what? - (laughing) wait, what? - What are the three milestones? - Well, let me tell you, first of all, we hit half a million subs- - At the time of recording
- at the time of recording, it's probably more by this time. So that's one of them. We hit a 100,000 followers on Twitter, and we hit 50,000
followers on the subreddit. All on the like, it's all on the same day. - All on the same, within
a few days of each other. - Yay!
- Thank you, guys. - Thank you for fucking supporting us and watching what we do. - And now we have a Drops of God wine. - Yes, this is a Drops of God wine. I don't know which Drops
of God Wine this is. - Ah, that's fucking good. - So I'm just gonna pour that. - He swooshed it around. - Yeah, I know.
- Can you believe that, man? The gall of this man. - There we go. - I would to talk about
Japanese bread for a moment. (laughing) - Japanese bread! Okay? - I think we've already talked about it. - No, no, no, I would
like to add something. I would like to add something
to my Japanese bread rant from the previous time. So, Japanese bread doesn't
serve the same purpose here as it does in European countries. That's a problem. I'm kidding, no. - No, you're not kidding. (laughing) - Bread is a staple in European countries. It's something I need, I
need it, I just need it. - (laughing) I knead. - And in Japan, it's like
a fucking dessert project. It's like a fourth grader's
like, ooh, let's spice it up. Let's put custard in the bread, let's do all this weird shit. Let's put hotdogs in the croissant. And it's like, "What? Stop." - Okay, to be fair though,
they're all pretty bomb. - No, I don't want custard, dude. And then like I, okay,
so, I like this bread. Don't get me wrong, I like this bread, but I feel like something's gone wrong. So next to our house, there's this bakery and they sell this really
fucking good bread. It's amazing, it's bread that is so good that you can just eat
it with nothing on it. And I put stuff on it, like
I put tuna and toasted it and it made the bread taste worse. And I was like,
- Really? - You're in the way of the bread. This is the bread's time to shine. And so I ate this whole loaf of bread. Problem was the loaf costed a thousand yen which is like $10. $10 for a loaf of bread?! Holy shit, dude! This better be diamond
encrusted, Jesus Christ! - If it's the main star
of whatever you're eating, I can see why it cost $10. I dunno, I've never been, personally, you know, I've
never been blown away by breads. - You ever been to Germany, bro? - No.
- No. - Well, there you go that's why. German people, man, say what you will, they've got bread figured out. All the Germans watching this
are like, "Hell yeah, we do." You go to Germany, you get
anything in their bakeries, it's fresh as fuck and it's amazing. It's so good! - Well then it just makes
me want to go to Germany. - So I'm gonna move to Germany
when I'm done with Japan. Hi Germany, please welcome me. - Just to eat the bread? - Pretzels alone, holy shit,
their pretzels are good. - Oh yeah, German food's fucking- - Holy fuck!
- It's so good. - I feel pretzels and uh, bread, for me, always need to be, they
are like the side dish to whatever the main
thing is between them. - Oh, he said it! (laughing) - I need to have something with my bread. - You haven't had a good pretzel, man. A good pretzel will change your life. - A good, fat, hot German
pretzel with mustard... - Yeah, mustard's good. - Oh, yeah, you don't like mustard (laughing) - You can put cheese on
it if you want, I think. - That's exactly it, I need cheese on it. - I was about to finish
my sentence, Garnt. Let me finish! A pretzel on its own,
just salted lightly, man, with little salt chunks in there. Man, you get a nice, ooh, you
get a nice bite of that salt, it goes perfect with your beer, man. And even in the morning, it's great. It's it's light, you can
have half the pretzel. Leave it, it's gonna be great later. It's just, pretzels, amazing.
- We're not talking about the tiny fucking principles. - The big boy ones.
- We're talking about the big German pretzels. - Tiny pretzels fucking suck. - Yeah, they do. - They suck, dude. - It's airplanes food. - It's a shitty cookie, is what it is. - It all hits the same. - No it doesn't. I've seen a lot on YouTube, at least. Bread is a huge, it's
becoming a huge culture here of like, experimenting
with it and pushing it to make it more dessert-like and what you can do with it. And I've noticed there
are a ton of bakeries that none of them do normal bread. It's just like what weird fucking thing can we do with bread? No, no, no, no, I put
life on the edge, Garnt. I'm not gonna do that, I think someone said that on
one of the episodes as well. - Yeah, every time I see it-
- Now I've noticed it, I can't not notice it, I'm just like- - Fine, I'll put it down. I spilt some, are you happy, Garnt? I spilled some when I moved it. - For fuck's sake, near the TV as well? What the fuck? - That's by your feet. Why would you put it by your feet? I can't, I can't. - One thing though that I will say that I think a lot of people
are gonna find controversial is that the Asian bakeries in America, usually the ones that are
owned by Koreans or Japanese, I feel that the bread
there is way too sweet. - Yeah, it's so sweet! - Way too sweet, but they
don't really do that here. - It's like everything is a brioche. - Yeah, yeah, exactly. - Every normal bread you get
tastes halfway to a brioche. It shouldn't, it tastes too sweet. - It's way too sugary, I don't
even taste the bread anymore. - Yeah, and I've had a
lot of Japanese people say "Do you think that Japanese
food is too sweet?" And I'm like, "Yes, it is too sweet. We have too much sugar in this shit." - Yeah, I would agree with that. - 'Cause you eat a melonpan, don't get me wrong, shit's amazing. If you look on the back, you
have a fucking heart attack when you see the sugar. It's 80 grams of sugar in that melonpan. And that's like what?
Like two Cokes and a half? Holy shit! What the fuck? - But I would rather eat a melonpan than two Cokes and a half. - 'Cause it's like they make this bread and don't get me wrong, it's as amazing as it looks
in the anime, it totally is. In the first week here I
used to eat it non-stop. Because I was like
- Of course you did. - I'm never gonna get fat, and then I had a scare when I looked at the back and I'm like,
"That's sugar, isn't it?" Don't tell me that's sugar. Google translate, oh, shit, it's sugar, fuck! - The fuck you expecting? - Who knew that a sweet
thing would have sugar in it? - I didn't think when it said 82- - Surprised Pikachu face. - 82 grams? Maybe it was protein. I don't know, maybe it was protein. (laughing) Maybe it was protein. Maybe the bread was very heavy in proteins - All these Japanese
waifus are getting swole, by the melonpan. - And then I start thinking to myself, I had this bread and I'm like "The bread tastes awfully sweet", and I did think it's kinda weird that the topping is just sugar. Huh? - Who would've fucking thought, hey? (laughing) - That's awfully weird - Talking about taking the
bread away from things, Let's talk about Japanese
hamburgers or hambagus - Yeah, that's right. It's not a hamburger, it's a hambagu. - An abomination to burgers. - I fucking love them! - I can't fucking stand when you order that shit.
- So to explain Japanese hambagus is literally just
a hamburger or a burger - Patty.
- patty without the bun. - What?! What?! (laughing) - Because it's good, I love it! - The best part of a hamburger, and I'm gonna go on one
of those rants again, man. It's like the pizza thing, dude, It's the synergy
- Synergy. - It's the synergy, bro. There is a way to a burger, man. It's all the accumulation of
the tastes that come together and they strike slightly moderately. - Because for 90% of burgers, you don't give a shit about the synergy, You're there for the fucking patty. - Uncultured, uncultured.
- You have a brioche bun with lettuce, tomatoes, and some bacon. It's fucking amazing, but
you get a McDonald's burger, Who gives a shit, man? - The McDonald's burger has been more engineered than any
burger in the world, Garnt. That thing has been scientifically proven to be the perfect-
- And it's been optimized as well.
- That is why you will never say no to a double
cheeseburger at McDonald's, I guarantee it. - I do because it's got ketchup on it. - Without ketchup. - Regardless of the point,
it's a fucking dry-ass patty. I don't give a shit about that, it is literal junk! - No, I love my gourmet burgers, dude. I love every kind of burger. The McDonald's burger has its place. - That's why, no matter
what hamburger you get, you get a gourmet patty
or what what would be a gourmet patty on a gourmet burger. - You always order the
shitty patties though, in these places. You order like the, the shitty hamburger that was made in a factory
probably 10 miles away. - And it's still 10 times
better than anything you order from fucking McDonald's
or even Burger King, or most burger joints. You know what I mean? - I'm gonna have to
agree with Garnt on that. (laughing)
- what? Don't get me wrong, sometimes I'll wake up - You're clowns,
- and just be like - You're fucking clowns. I'll never say no to a double cheeseburger or a whopper right on some days. - A Whopper burger here is great. I'll take it over any of those shitty burgers.
- Sometimes you're just like, "I just wanna eat some shit today." But then other times you're like, "I really just want meat." I just want a hamburger,
I just want the patty. - It's just the patty. - Fuck the synergy, I just want the patty. - In my eyes, if you're going
to just order a hamburger just with veg and maybe fries,
just get a fucking steak. - [Garnt And Joey] No, no, no. - It's totally different from steak. - It's hitting me. - I will never eat a fucking
steak over a hamburger, never. - What?! - Yeah, I just don't like steak! - I will take the inferior, worst-tasting piece of the cow.
- I don't like steak! - Oh my god, bro. - I think steak is fucking mid. - No man, okay. - Okay, okay, okay. - I think steak is like eating cardboard. It's just a fucking piece of meat. - To me, eating a hambagu, right- - What is going on?! What are these takes right now?! - I'll let him freak out. Eating a hambagu, it's like a kid's meal. It doesn't look right, it looks like- - [Garnt And Joey] What
are you talking about?! - 'Cause it's like, "Oh,
little Garnt can't handle the tomatoes and the bread? Oh, we'll just take the
burger out for you." - It's just a different way
to enjoy a part of the meal. - When you get the veg in a bag with your little milk and your juice. It's a different way to have it. - You talked about pizza,
it's like, oh yeah. I can only eat cheese when it's on pizza. - Who said that? - Huh?
- Who said that? - No, that's, that's
- There's probably someone, - By the same logic, you're like, "I can't have mozzarella by itself." - Why would you have mozzarella by itself? - 'Cause it's fucking great! - Yeah, it tastes good. - No, no, no, no. - It's great with a salad. - Yeah, that's fine. That's not by itself, Garnt! By itself means on its own! - A hambagu is not- - Do you know what by itself means?! - A hambagu is not a patty by itself. You got like, potatoes,
you got vegetables. - You got eggs, you got sauce,
- You can put some cheese, You put it on a fucking curry, you can put it on so many things that just is not bread
and lettuce and tomatoes! - When you have a steak
and it comes with fries, is the steak by itself? - What? Say that again? - If you order a steak
and it comes with fries, is it by itself? - No, it's with the fries, but I don't give a shit about the steak. - You, but what you're saying is is that because it's taken out, it's not by itself or something? - The patty's not by itself
- Whoa, Whoa, what I'm, - What I'm trying to say is you don't have to have steak with fries, you can have steak with
a lot of other things! - [Joey] Yeah. - If the patty is just a singular thing and there's veg next to
it, the patty's by itself. That's just a fact, bro. - (laughing) What? - What? - What are you talking about? - Because, right, that is not
part of, a burger, it's a meal all put in one.
- The patty is a fucking ingredient to a bigger whole, but you can take the ingredients and you can do other things
with the ingredients. - If you have all the
ingredients of a soup, next to each other, it's
not a fucking, it's not, You can't just be like, "Oh, it's not by itself, it's
a soup. What do you mean?" You're chatting out of your ass, bro. It's a burger on its own, just left there! It's depressing! Put some fucking lettuce and tomatoes and bread on that shit, man! - But it's on the side. - It's on the side! You can have other stuff. You can eat a burger in more than one way. - You can eat the hambagu, you take a bite of that shit.
- You uncultured fuck! - You can eat the burger on the side. - Why don't you just go
to fucking McDonald's, order a burger and just pry it apart, take the hamburger out and eat it? Garnt, you fucking animal! - Because the patty is shit! That is why! - The patty is garbage. - [Garnt And Joey] The patty is garbage. - Yeah, but so is this
burger that you get- - [Garnt And Joey] No, it's not! - The beef that they give you, The beef that they give you that isn't A5 beef here is pathetic beef. - No, it's not!
- It's so sad. - It's a fucking great burger. - As I was informed by a friend of mine, whose whole job is to manage
exports of meat into Japan, he informed me that all the beef that isn't the top grade
stuff is just imported from other countries.
- Well, then fuck him. - And it tastes like shit! - Fuck him! - You're acting like
that Reddit comment now. - I am, I am, I don't give a shit. - Garnt, excuse me, I am a beef expert. - My dad works for Nintendo. - I've heard from a friend
who works in the industry. - Listen, listen. When you grow up,
basically, next to farms, and you get that beef,
you get it fresh, man. You can't give me this
shit of this air-sealed bag of a beef carcass flown across a country. It tastes like shit. - Well, what if I didn't grow
up up next to a fucking farm? - Well, that sucks to be you, Joey. Go and eat your hamburger. - But by that same logic, why can you still enjoy McDonald's patties or burgers then? - Because that as a
burger is a great burger. It's a fucking great- - It's not! It's trash! - No, no, no, no, no, no. - It's not even the best
burger in the fast food joint. If you take a fucking Burger
King over a McDonald's burger any day of the week- - It depends on the mood. - You're such a liar! - What fucking mood?
- Who would actually? - Explain to me the mood that you need to be in.
- Who would we take a McDonald's burger over a Burger King?
- When I am absolutely plastered, there's nothing more I want than double cheeseburgers from McDonald's. They have this- - That just sounds like
your fucking prerogative. (laughing) - But also, I just think that McDonald's, in the UK at least, was
the best fast food chain. - Yeah, probably, but there
weren't many to pick from, I would say. - Yeah. Bu there's way more to pick from here. - I mean like, okay,
- At the end of the day, - If you could take a Burger King burger with McDonald's fries, that would be the perfect
fast food restaurant for me. As it stands, I either have to pick between a shitty burger and good fries or a less shitty burger and worse fries. - I'm convinced all the fast food places have an agreement of who's
gonna have the best what, because why does not one
of them just figured out, "Hey, those are the good fries? Why don't we get those fries?" You know what I mean? - Yeah, true. But I guarantee if I blindfolded you and I made you eat both of them- - The fries? I could
tell, a hundred percent. - No, I don't think-
- We're doing it. (laughter drowns out Connor) - I reckon you could do
that with a burger as well and you wouldn't be able to tell. - Oh dude, with fast food chains? - Yeah.
- Hundred percent I can tell. I'll bet my life on it. - We gotta do it now. (laughing) We gotta fucking do that.
- Order Uber Eats right now! - We gotta do it now. - Talking about beef though, let's talk about actual Japanese beef and Japanese steaks because like- - A5 or nothing. - A5-
- or nothing. - A5 is like, I thought- - It's not that much more expensive. - It's so weird living in a country where you can go to your
local local supermarket and get A5 beef. And this is the type of beef that gets shipped over
and you pay 50 bucks for a fucking hundred
grams of something abroad, and then you can just get
it here at your supermarket. As much as I don't rate steaks, A5 steaks, they do the
striking comparatively. (laughing) - I had a Wagyu burger yesterday
and it was fucking amazing. And I'm so glad that there was bread, lettuce, and tomatoes and cheese, Garnt. - Don't start this again. We just steered away from it. - I'm just saying, I just felt good. I mean a burger and a steak are two different things in my mind. But okay, Wagyu steak is amazing, especially when they
fry that shit in butter like, so much that it absorbs it. And you bite into it, it's like (gasps). - Yeah, I don't know though. Like for me, steak is just like, how often do you have a steak? - Not often, that's why I- - You can't have steak often, it gets old. - I would understand, coming
from your perspective, why you hate steak, but to
me, steak is the best meal or the best meats you can get if it's- - False,
- prepared well. - Which is false. - What's better than a good steak? - I think pork is the best meat. - Get the fuck out of here! - Like a pork steak? - No, no, no, not a pork steak. I just think, well, pork steaks are good. Like Gammon chops are fucking amazing. - Right.
- No, no, no. Okay, here's how the tier list goes, okay? Here's how the fucking tier list goes. Okay, it goes like an
amazing steak at top. I couldn't eat a steak every day, but as a one off meal, steak is my- - I admit, it's up there,
it's up there, yeah. - Then after that comes chicken, 'cause chicken you can do so much with, and you can never get bored of chicken. - I could eat fried chicken
every day of the week and be real. - And then below that is pork. - No, no, no.
- Below that is pork because I would never, anything you cook with pork, I feel like you can do
something similar with chicken. - No, I feel like pork has, it's the in-between, whereas
beef is really heavy, pork is the in-between, and I feel like you can
do so much with pork. I love sausages, man! Sausages are amazing - Yeah, but you can also
have beef sausage as well. - What the fuck? I've never had a beef sausage in our life. - There's nothing you can do with pork that you can't do with
either chicken or beef and have it taste better. - Wait, do you like hotdogs? - No. - He acts like a guy who
doesn't like hotdogs. (laughing) - How do you not like hotdogs? - 'Cause the dude who's talking about- - Oh, it's because you don't
like fucking condiments, that's why! - And also, the people who talk so highly about steak are like, "No, no, no, hotdog are for
peasants. I couldn't possibly." I love a good hotdog. - Hotdog, does this have dog in it? (laughing) - I love hotdogs, man. I know they're absolute
garbage and probably cancerous- - Okay, you have to have a
beef sausage hotdog though. Because you've never had
a beef sausage, right? - Wait, wait, tell me the
difference between a hotdog- - And a sausage? - And a sausage. Okay, if you're ever gonna
take a hotdog over a sausage, I don't think we can be friends. - No, exactly, exactly. But you know when you're at a barbecue and people are being kinda cheap, they don't wanna bring the
big sausages, you're like, "Fine, I'll eat four hotdogs, fine." - Yeah, that's the thing. I would never pick a
hotdog over a sausage. - No, no, no, never. - It's like a double cheeseburger, right? If it's there, I'll eat it. - Okay, with a sausage
hotdog like a thick boy, you can only put one of those away. With a hotdog, I feel like you
can put three or four away. - Well, yeah, 'cause
they're so fucking thin. - And they just taste like... A sausage, a good sausage is heavy. The reason I don't like hotdogs is that, or the reason I would never
take it over the sausage, is that it just tastes so processed. - That's 'cause it is! - There's something about
highly processed food that my brain is (laughs goofily) - Question, do you like spam? - Okay, you're gonna laugh now and my mum's gonna feel so bad. My mom used to make this meal
and I fucking loved it, dude. I would always ask my mum to make it. It was literally mashed
potatoes and spam, just mashed. And I fucking loved this shit. - Wait, with no flavoring on top of it? - No, no, no, just mashed potato in spam. Imagine a giant fucking
pan of mashed potato, and I would just take a
giant plate full of this shit and I would gobble that shit up, man. I would eat that for days. - That's like cancer in a plate. - Because spam is one of those things where it's like if I'm
offered spam on its own and I can see it, I'm like,
"Get that away from me. Get that shit away from me." But when it's in something,
disguised, I'm like, "Yo, this shit claps, what is it?" Oh, it's spam. - Spam fried rice is- - Spam fired rice is pretty good. - I used to fucking hate spam. I was like, "Ew, get
that shit away from me." Give me real meat. - Isn't there a spam in Hawaii? They make a spam sushi or something? - Yeah, that's either Hawaii or Okinawa. I think it's an Okinawa
dish with spam nigiri. - I don't fuck with that. - Spam nigiri is fucking dope. - I don't fuck with spam, I don't know. - I used to not fuck with it, but spam is such a huge
thing in the Philippines. So going to Aki's parents' place, every second meal had spam in it, so I couldn't avoid the shit. - Spam is what I eat to remind me what good meat tastes like. (laughing) - What do the peasants eat nowadays? I must know. Oh, spam, is it? - Hotdog and spam? - I suppose I could give a
hotdog and spam a trial too. Oh, rather distasteful. I wanna know, when you go to the combini, what's the top three
food items that you get? - It depends on the combini. - Yeah. I always get, yeah it
depends on the combini, but say if it's Family Mart, I always get the fucking tuna bread. Do you know the brand? - Oh the- - The long boy, yeah.
- Yeah, that shit's good. That shit's good.
- The long boy tuna bread, that shit always claps. - Okay, anything with mayo in here, in Japan is so much better. - Yeah, so the tuna bread- - Mayo is god tier. - The tuna bread with the mayo on top- - As someone who hates
mayo, I gotta admit, Japan is the only place where
I can kind of be okay with it. - That's saying a lot,
that's saying a lot! - I will never eat mayo by itself, but when it's in a nice
potato salad or something, yeah, I'd fuck with that. - I thought that egg sandwiches were the most depressing
fucking thing in the world. - I agree, yeah. - In the UK, they're like this white mush that looks disgusting, it
smells vile, it's just gross. And then you have it in Japan, it's like this yellow,
bright color, it's inviting, it's like, oh, eat me. And I was like, you know what? - Eat me. - I just might
- Eat me. - I just might, and I had it and I had it. I had it and my mind was blown and I cannot stop eating the
egg sandwiches here, man. - The egg sandwiches
are fucking godly here. - I can never eat an egg
sandwich anywhere else now, 'cause I'm gonna be thinking, dude- - Japan has ruined eggs for me. - Eggs and mayo are just god tier here. - Yeah, because I remember the concept of just going to my first yakiniku place and just having the dips,
for some dipping sauce in yakiniku, which is, how do I explain yakiniku? It's just like grilled meats basically. - It's like Korean barbecue- - How do I explain it? It's meat. - It's like Korean barbecue, but replace Korean with Japanese. - And it's on a skewer basically. So for some dishes, they
give you just an egg as a dipping sauce, the
egg yolk, a raw egg yolk; which firstly, the
concept of eating raw eggs was really, really weird for me until I tried it for the first time. And raw egg here tastes fucking great. - Yeah.
- Oh, yeah. - And it's safe. - Our producer, Maylene,
is obsessed with eggs. - You can't get salmonella
here from the eggs. - It's pretty impossible, yeah. - When I did one of my videos,
I drank a bunch of egg, all the comments were
like, "Oh my god, Connor- - He's gonna die - "You're gonna get
salmonella, you dumb fuck." I know more, I got told
eggs give salmonella. And I was like reverse Uno card in this. Yeah, hit me up with that. - I don't think it's a
hundred percent unlikely. I have heard of a couple of- - It's worth the risks,
it's worth the risk - I've heard of a couple of my friends get very mild salmonella
from the eggs here, but it's really, really rare. Like it's not as easy to get
salmonella like in America. - It's because I think in America and the UK and most of Europe,
I think we wash the eggs and we get rid of the
protective film, or the coat. And I think it's also something
to do with how we feed them certain drugs to make
them immune to diseases. Yeah, 'cause like, what is
it, shabu-shabu and sukiyaki? - Sukiyaki. - That's one of my favorites, actually. - Sukiyaki, is like, yeah,
I put you onto that, right? - Yeah, that shit's- - Sukiyaki's the best fucking hotpot. - Shabu-shabu is like, they boil this meat and veg in this broth and it's kinda weak, it's like (sighs) - I don't rate shabu-shabu. - It's like they always
advertise themselves as shabu-shabu places,
and then they might have the sukiyaki on the menu,
but they never advertise it. It's always yo, we got shabu-shabu. And it tastes like shit! It's like water. It's like bathwater for your meat. - I still think the best hotpot for me is Chinese hotpot. Chinese hotpot, it's way more flavorful. And it's a heavy broth. - Have you had sukiyaki though? - Have you had it? - I have, I have had it. - Okay, so sukiyaki, if
you don't know at home, what's the broth that they cook it in? It's like a rich... - It's soy based with a little
bit of, fuck, what was it? It's like dashi, it's dashi. I don't know how to explain dashi. - It's this really rich broth, and to mellow it out
and enhance the flavors, you dunk it in egg yolk. - Yeah, so you crack a
raw egg, you whip it up, and then you dip that shit in. - So you cook everything in the broth and it's all covered in soy, all the veg has absorbed
it, you dunk it in the egg, and then you eat it and
it's fucking amazing. It's so good. - So good.
- It's so good. And Chinese hotpot is good, but I think sukiyaki's better. - Yeah, I rave Chinese hotpot. Every time I've had a Chinese
hotpot, I'm like, hell yeah. - Also, Japanese hotpot's pretty good too. We've had it at our place. - Abe, yeah, yeah. - We had like a, I
don't know which hotpot- - We had that on Christmas 'cause Connor didn't want a fucking roast. - None of us have an oven! What are we gonna roast, Garnt? How are we gonna fucking roast a chicken in a tiny little fish grill? You get a grill in your
stove top, oven top, sorry. Oven top, and you get this grill for fish and it's like this wide. - Yeah, you have to pull it out.
- It can literally fit just one fish. - Yeah.
- You wanna roast a potato? Good fucking luck, dude. - You gotta cut that bitch in the third. - You're gonna have to pan fry the potato. He's like, I want a roast, How are we gonna have a roast, Garnt? Explain the logistics behind this. The logistics, Garnt,
I'm bringing it back. - Now I have an oven and I think you- - Yeah, I have an oven as well, yeah. - So yeah, next time- - Sorry that we can afford an oven. (laughing) - Why would I need an oven when I eat out every fucking day? (laughing) Connor, you're so lazy,
why do you eat out? Sometimes, I meal prep, meal prep, this sounds so fucking lame. I meal prep, bro. I'll make a curry for five days and I'll eat the curry over
five days, like a Thai curry. That's about it, that's as
far as cooking goes for me. - But that's the thing,
I'm pretty sure we touched upon this on a previous episode, - But people got so pissed when we said. That they were like, "It's
not cheaper to eat out if you do X and X and X." And it's, yeah, if I ate pasta and sauce, of course it's gonna be cheaper. But if you want to have
something that tastes different, yes, it's gonna maybe be a 100- - If you want a different
meal every day, yeah, exactly. - And you can't be fucked
to go shopping every day because the expire date on
shit is like two days to go! - And more often than not, when you buy stuff, it's too
much portions that I can't use. Like veg here is normally portioned for more than one person. - Yeah, it's like family portion. - Yeah, so I wanted, what was it? What's the small onions,
like the green onions? What are they called? Is it green onions? - Shallots. - I think it's shallots in America. - Spring onion? - Spring onion for us. You cannot just get two spring onions. - It has to be a whole fucking- - Yeah, it's either a whole fucking one, or a giant tub of cut-up ones. And I'm talking more than any one person could ever use in a week. - It's like that big. - It's like a tub this thick
just filled with these cuts, and it's like, I'm not gonna use this. I feel bad 'cause I throw
all the ingredients away 'cause I can't use them. - Well, it's because cut shallots are used in literally every Japanese dish, so. - And if I get tomatoes, they
always come in packs of six. Tomatoes are fucking big! I don't need six most of the time. And 'cause of how we do,
say we record on Tuesdays, we're gonna eat out,
and then maybe on Monday I'm going to meet someone for a meeting or maybe I've got a shoot on Thursday, so I'm gonna eat out, So it's more like one day a week I eat in. And even then I'll just go to the combini and get the 500 Yen ramen. - Yeah. - Which is, sure, I could make my own- - Which is technically the top tier ramen. - Which I could make my own ramen. But it'd be more expensive. So it's like, yeah, of course some people, if you want to be picky about
it, yeah, you can save money. The same way if you eat pasta in the UK you'll save a shit ton of money. But if you wanna live like a human being,
- If you actually wanna enjoy your food. - Yeah, if you wanna not be depressed 24/7 while you're eating, like, yeah, okay. - 'Cause going back to the combini thing about foods that we buy, I go less to the combini now to get meals. I remember when I first moved here, I would go to get a combini
meal every fucking day. And the combini fried chicken
here is fucking great. - Okay, with an asterisk. - With an asterisk. FamilyMart fried chicken
fucking sucks, okay?! It's way too greasy. - It's like a layer of like, fat. - You feel like you're eating
death as you're taking a bite. - And I see YouTubers,
I think Chris Broad says that his favorite's FamilyMart chicken and you eat into this thing, and it's the most depressed
things you can eat. - It's as depressed as he is. (laughing) - You take a bite into this thing, it is pure water and oil. That chicken was probably
anemic in its real life and they pumped that
shit with water and oil and they're like, dude do it. Lawson's fried chicken on the other hand. - Nah, nah, nah. Seven fried chicken at the top. - Seven fried chicken.
- I think Seven fried chicken is in the middle, man. Lawson's do this sweet and sour, it's salty and sweet, like
teriyaki fried chicken. It's fucking good,
dude, it's fucking good. It hits different, it
hits back. It hits back. You bite into this thing,
it's fighting you, bro, in the good way. It's like, damn, there's so
much flavor in this thing, it's like, oh shit, oh shit. (laughing) Holy shit, I just wanted the
fired chicken, not a fight. Also when you first come to Japan, you're like onigiri, bro. Jelly-filled donuts immediately. - Yeah, of course. - 'Cause it's new, it's
exciting, it tastes good. And then when I moved here,
I was eating it and I'm like, "This kind of tastes
boring, really boring." And then I thought who would
have a sandwich in Japan? I don't want a, I can get a
better sandwich in the UK. And then you start
experimenting a little bit, and I had the egg and
my go-to sandwich combo. I cry if this isn't available. In Lawson's they have a god
tier tuna mayo sandwich, and the other one is the egg one. - The egg and ham? - It's beautiful, it's beautiful, man. I cry every time I eat it. - Yeah, that is definitely my
favorite sandwich combination. - It's so good because you
have the tuna and you're like, "Ooh, a little salty, a little fishy." You have the egg and
mayo one, you're like, "Fuck, dude, this is good." - Yeah, yeah. - I'm actually the opposite. When I'm first moved here, I'm like why would I
want a fucking onigiri? And now it's just like
a very nice casual snack where you don't want a
full meal, you just want- - Onigiri's quite filling though, I find. - That's it, You have that as a snack
and it fills you up and you don't need anything else. - Yeah, exactly, exactly. - For a while.
- I guess, yeah. I always, when I go to the
combini in the morning, sometimes I can't be
bothered to make a breakfast, so I go to the combini in the morning, and I always get my breakfast and then some kind of onigiri. Because I know the breakfast
is gonna fill me up, but then I know a couple of hours later, I'm gonna be feeling a little bit peckish, And the onigiri is just perfect to fill in that little spot it creates. - My problem with onigiri is sometimes, it's like a coin toss. You might get one where they're
generous with the fillings, and sometimes you bite into that shit and there's one shred of tuna in it. And you're like, "Where's the flavor, bro? I just ate into to seaweed and rice." There was one piece of tuna
with a slap of mayo on it. - Yeah, yeah. - It sucks, man. If it was consistent, maybe I'd like it. - But you only eat the tuna onigiri. - No, I like the salmon
and the cod roe one. - Oh yeah? - Yeah, the cod roe one's fine, but cod roe is kind of intense, so. - Have you tried some
of the other flavors, like the flavored rice flavors? - Oh, you mean like the fried rice ones? The fried rice ones are fine, but again, I'm always thinking like- - They're situational for me. - I would rather them warm. (laughing) - Got back to this shit again. - I want it warm. - You can warm it up! Just put that bitch in the microwave! - It doesn't feel right. - I don't wanna microwave
rice, that's depressing, man. I don't know. - I don't know, would you rather cold rice or microwave rice? - Cold.
- Well, then stop fucking complaining (laughing). - But I would rather it be freshly- - Yeah, but that aint gonna
happen at a fucking combini. - For you, as a white person, (laughing) who grew up- - That's really situational. - As a white person.
- As a white person. - As a white person. - The point I was trying to make here is how did it feel going from eating rice every now and again to eating
rice for almost every meal? Because I've had a
conversation with people who grew up grew up in
America, grew up in England, they've moved to an Asian
country and they're like, "Man, I really it at first
and then I just got bored of eating rice for every meal." But I grew up with this
shit, so I'm used to it. - It wears you down a little bit, but I feel like you
really do get used to it. I don't know, maybe some
people, they like it at first, and, like you said, they start to hate it. But for me it was like, I don't know, rice has just always been there. It's like bread, but in a
different format for me. (laughing) It's like if bread is the hard drive, then rice is the SD card in my mind They all do the same thing. They just fill you up and they're carbs. - [Garnt] Yeah. - I think most of the time
here, it's not just plain rice. Sometimes it is, like
when you go to ryokan and it's just plain fucking rice in it. And it's so starchy and
sticky, you're like, "Fuck, dude, I'm eating
fucking Play-Doh here." (laughing) But when you go to my
favorite place in the world, Matsuya, you know. - Here we go again. Here we go again. - I must look like a freak when I do this. So when they cook the pork, pork, by the way, Garnt, not beef. Beef tastes like shit. They cook the pork, right. There's like juices, and
normally you just kinda pick up the pork and put in the rice, put some mayo on it and then eat it. In the restaurant, I hold
up my plate and pour all the fats and stuff on the rice. - I know, I can agree with that. - Tastes so fucking good, dude,
'cause it makes it so rich. - But it's just the fucking the audacity to go into a beef bowl place
and order pork (laughing). - This guy. - This guy. - Honestly, you go to Matsuya, man, I'm telling you, man,
that pork and ginger. - Oh no, I've had it, it's great. - We were smashed one time and I was like- - But it's like vanilla beef. Why would I have a- - Vanilla beef! Are you out of your mind?! Don't start this again! (laughing) Vanilla beef, really?! Oh my god, man. - If I walk into a Matsuya,
I'm ordering a beef bowl. - It's beef without attitude. What can I say? That's pork, that's pork. - Yeah, pork is like beta beef. (laughing)
- Nah man, I don't know man. (laughing) - I already know this is gonna be the biggest comment war
in the comments section. Out of any shitty opinion on anime- - We have mainly Americans watching us and I feel that Americans
will side with beef, 'cause beef is way more prevalent, - And they're right. - No, no, they're not right, guys. (laughing) They're not right. - You know what's an underrated meat? - What?
- Lamb, lamb is pretty fucking good. - Okay, here's the thing about lamb, is that has to be really
good quality lamb. Because if it's not,
the after taste in lamb can be so overpowering that
it just tastes horrible. - Yeah, lamb fucking sucks here, bro. - Yeah, sometimes it's like
eating leather, essentially. - Yeah, we went to a restaurant once, man, and it was like a roulette
wheel on this lamb. For some reason, some of these lamb chops were perfectly cooked. You had another one, it's like trying to - Eating a boot.
- Chew through a tire, man. It was like (breathes loudly) And it's like when do I
just swallow it and give up? When do I just admit- - It's like I had a chiseled
jawline by the end of it 'cause from all the fucking
chewing I was doing. - It's either my jaw
dislocates or I'm done, bro. - Or I'm choking on this
fucking tire piece of lamb. - Yeah, there's just some meats like that. And especially coming from
Wales where, you know, they fuck sheep, that's the stereotype, that's what everyone does. I mean, lamb is fucking
great, you get great lamb - I guess another question I have for you, which is a conversation I've
had with a lot of people who have never been to Asia. - Go ahead. - Who have never been to
Asia or lived in Asia, is this concept of cooking your own meal in a restaurant. Like going to a Korean barbecue
or going to a shabu-shabu, and having to cook your own
meal and cook your own meats. What's your opinion of that? - As a colonial white man? I'm joking. (laughing) - As a upper class white man.
- Because I really like that. I really like the social part. - Well, the first time I
went to a Korean barbecue was with you and I was like,
"I'ma just let Garnt do this." (laughing) Let the Brown boy do it! - Because I really like
the social aspect of, one, being able to
control how, for example, how cooked your steak
is, to do that yourself. - Yeah, sure. We have Gordon Ramsey, right? - [Joey] Yeah. - He's a white man who can
cook, that's an anomaly. White people can't cook, man? I'll give it to every other culture. - 'Cause there's cause there's
a chain of pubs in Australia where inside of the pub there's
literally just a butcher of just rows and rows of
steaks and meats and whatever. And you pick out whatever
steak you want, you pay for it, they give it to you, and
then you have to take that over to the barbecue and
just make it yourself. - The reason why I don't like
cooking it myself is, one, I wanna pay the other
person to do that, right? - [Garnt] Yeah. - I don't wanna pay you so I
can fuck up this piece of meat. - Right. - I'll go and do that at home. I'll go and fuck this up- - I don't wanna embarrass
myself in public. - 'Cause the worst part is, is when you go to a Korean barbecue, you take someone there. When you take someone to Korean barbecue or any kind of barbecue like that, you're the one who has to cook,
'cause you took them there. It's on you. And they just sit back and they're like, "Go ahead, go ahead." And then I'm like, "Fuck dude, how do I know this is cooked?" And the worst part is they're
like, "Let's get chicken." And I'm like fuck! Fuck! When is chicken cooked? I don't know. 'Cause personally, I will just
let the chicken get black. And I'm like, all right, it's safe to eat. It's safe to eat, dig in kids! - It's just like you're okay
with going to a barbecue and having someone cook for you, so why, why can't you put that
in a restaurant experience? Right? What's the difference? - I mean, 'cause it's like we're
all bringing our own meats. - Or you can just order
good quality meat, I guess. - Why would I do that in a restaurant when I can just do that at home? You get the exact same experience. - But then why do you go to a barbecue? Why do people do barbecues? It's 'cause it's a social experience. - Well, that's the exact same
thing with a Korean barbecue. - That's exactly the same thing with going to a shabu-shabu or going
to a Korean barbecue. - If you gave me the choice, you're like, "Connor, you can have Korean
barbecue where you cook it or Korean barbecue where
the guy who works here and often comes on." 'Cause they see you fucking
burning the meat anyway, and they come in like no, no, no. And they start like, they're like, they come and fix it for you. So, just save the embarrassment
and just do it for me right. - But it's just like an activity, because I feel like- - Then go and do an activity! Why you gotta make your fucking meal into an adventure, bro? - Because like, okay, here's the thing, especially when, I
remember going to America where the only reason you, especially hanging out
with Sydney's family deep in the Midwest, they only
go to a restaurant to eat. And that's just it. - I think that's how it should be. The only exception to me is hotpot 'cause you can't fuck a hotpot up. You just throw everything in. Just throw it all in. - I dunno man, I've seen
people fuck up a hotpot. - Yeah, that's true, that's true. - You can fuck up a hotpot. But to me, a restaurant can be like an entire experience
where you catch up with friends and everything. I feel like in the West,
you don't go to a restaurant for anything else but the purpose of just having a meal and eating. - I disagree, I think it's
changing a little bit now. At least it was the UK, before I left. It was very much becoming
an experience kind of thing over whatever the restaurant was serving. - Some of the quietest
restaurants I've ever been to have been in America
where no-one is talking and they're just silently eating. I mean, you could do this at home, - I don't like to make my meal that I look forward to all
day into a stressful thing. If every time I took a shit I had to put in the input
code and it's flashing on the bidet, dude, that's
gonna, I don't wanna, yeah, it's a fun activity at first, but that's gonna get
old real fucking fast. Like if you're adding steps- - I don't know if that's the same thing. - I mean, I just feel
like you're adding steps to something which doesn't require steps. - But it does, that's where
the enjoyment comes in. - Yeah. - What?
- It's like a group activity. - Okay, shout out to the
people who get anxiety with cooking, I'm sure you can relate. You're like, "Why would
I wanna fuck this up when I can just pay someone to do it?" - In my defense, I can't
cook to save my life. I fuck up a toast,
that's the kind of like- (laughing) that's the kind of like fucking- - And you will cook your own
food in those restaurants? - And yet, I love going to a yakiniku and being the one to be
like, "I'll cook the meat." - Yeah.
- No. - Because it's the one and only time I'm in front of food where I have control. - It's like a power move. - It is a power move. - Let me fucking handle
this. Let me cook the meat. - Let me show you how it's done. - Yeah. - If you get impressed by
someone putting meat on a grill, I mean fair play to you, man,
I'm not really buying that. I'm like, "Go and work in the kitchen." (laughing) Get out of my seat. - That's what I love about
yakiniku and Korean barbecues is that it's literally you
just have a fucking meal of just grilled meat. That's like having the
burger without the bun. (laughing) - Here's my main problem- - Cut out the fucking middle man and just give me the good shit, man! - I love yakiniku,
don't get me wrong, man. I love yakiniku. There is a fundamental
problem with yakiniku. - Go on. - I hate the loading times for the meat. (laughing) - You can't skip the loading time. - You can't skip the loading. Okay, at a good restaurant, what would a good restaurant do? They prepare all the foods so
it comes out at the same time? - Yeah.
- Sign of a good restaurant, because everyone can start
eating immediately, right? With a yakiniku place, especially if you go with fucking Maylene, I wanna chuck all the
meat on straight away so that we can start eating everything and we have a constant
stream of meat coming in. Maylene, when I went with her, she wanted to put one tiny
fucking piece of beef on it and wait five minutes. - Well that's Maylene's problem. - Yeah.
- You know? (laughing) - That's why you don't go to
a restaurant with Maylene. - When I like to eat, I wanna keep eating. - Yeah, that's why you
gotta fucking optimize it. So you have- - He's got the strats now!
- You can fucking optimize this because you have the meats on it, and then as the meats getting
done, you put more meat on it and you put this on the side, - Speed run yakiniku. - And then as you're eating the meat, then the other meat is cooking and there's never a down period. - No, no, no, that's not
true, that doesn't happen, In a realistic world,
Garnt, that doesn't happen. - That is how it happens.
- That is how it happens. - You've just not optimized your Korean barbecue experience.
- You don't like yakiniku because you've just been to shit yakinikus - Also, right, here's
another awkward scenario. I hate this. - [Garnt] Okay. - Four of you go to a yakiniku restaurant, The A5 beef comes out. It's in six pieces. What do you do, Garnt? Who decides who gets how many A5? This is the A5 beef, Garnt, come on. This is 8,000 Yen for these six slabs. Who gets what, Garnt? 'Cause personally, I'm
not gonna lie, I want two. - Okay. - How do I argue? - That just goes down
to the Asian experience of sharing your meals
and sharing your dishes. - How the fuck do we turn
six into eight, Garnt? Because someone- - Cut one of them in half? - No, that's depressing,
that's depressing, bro. You can't do that, man. It's already precut. - Asian families can do it no problem. - I need to do Monopoly mind games at my fucking family dinner to make sure I'm getting the most meat. - Let me tell you how to solve this. - [Connor] Go, go. - Because this happens every time. You have the four pieces, you have the two pieces left. And the Connor's like, "Is
nobody gonna eat these? Okay, I'll just take them." That is the experience
hanging out with Connor. He is that guy who's just like- - Listen, you know what's more stressful than when you're hungry
and there's one piece left and nobody seems to give a fuck that there's one piece left on the table? It's like, are we gonna eat this or not? Because if no-one's gonna
do it, I'm gonna do it. - Then just do it. - No, because I also, okay, with you guys, I don't
give a fuck, I'll do it. But maybe when we're first
getting to know each other, I didn't want you guys
to go home and be like, "Why's Connor always fucking
talking all our food, man? He's always going for it straight away. He's going for the kill." Right? This is a real social problem, 'cause if I'm getting dinner, every single time I have my
peace, I'll chat a little bit, and I look to go and get my next piece and the fucking fat ass over
there is taking it every time. I want to know that there's
at least a cool-down period between him eating one piece and there's at least a
two-minute cool down to wait. It's so stressful, there's
so many social issues with meat being cooked on its own! Just let us all order our own shit!
- I feel like you're way too over complicating this, man. - Listen, because you
don't realize it, Joey. - You're creating problems out of nothing. - No, no, no, 'cause
Joey, your social skills are perfectly normal human beings. You just glide through it,
you don't worry about it. Joey just dances through, man. For me it's like a science, bro. It's a science. Social situations, right? You gotta make sure you don't do anything for a new person that
could make you seem weird. - All right.
- So that includes not eating too much. If you go home, they
think you're a fat ass, oh, get a load of this
guy eating all our meat that we split the bill on! He ate the most! Connor
should've paid the money. - In my mind, if you're not gonna eat it, you guys know we're splitting this meal. So if you're not gonna eat it, I'm gonna just fucking take it. - But sometimes that
hasn't been made clear. Who's splitting? Are we
splitting this, are we not? We don't know. This is the awkward social situations that you encounter often, Joey. - Right, but I'm just like, this opportunity of taking
this last piece of meat is here right now. I don't give a fuck about what percentage are we gonna split this
based on how many pieces of meat we ate.
- I'm jealous of you, Joey, that you can throw caution
to the wind like that and just take the meat. - If people think I'm a fat ass, well, then that's their problem. I have the full stomach, not you. You missed the opportunity,
I take that opportunity. I am an opportunist in that sense. - You say that like you're the one who always takes the
last piece, when it's me. - Yeah, it is you. And in my head I'm just like,
"Look at fucking fat ass!" - What I do is I wait, you gotta wait until you're pretty
confident that everyone has just decided they
don't want this anymore, and then you go in for the kill. - See, I've been in
way too many situations where it's such a Japanese thing, especially when you go to
a business dinner in Japan, there's always, it's like a
rule, it's like a social rule to leave one piece of whatever the fuck it is.
- Why? Why?! That's so annoying! - Because it's this whole idea of- - The Japanese culture
of "You go, no, you go, no, you go." - It's the crowd before me. It's the whole collective mentality. And so I've been in so many
of those situations where, in the end, no one takes the piece at all. - And they just take the food back? - And then they just take the food back. - Ah, no dude, take me back to the kitchen Give me all the one piece leftovers. I'm gonna eat them, bro.
- So that's why, now, because I've been in so many
situations where I'm like, "Why is he taking that away? There's still one piece left on it." I'm just like, let me use my gaijin card for a second hand here and
just give me that piece. - Think of all the
wasted food that happened because of socially awkward situations. - Yeah. - Wasn't it better if we all
just figured out a system? - It's just a piece of meat, bro. - It's not just a piece of meat, Garnt. That's A5 beef you're talking about.
- She meant something to me! - I mean, if it's A5 beef, fair enough. - Get a load of this guy,
this guy doesn't eat hotdogs, - If it's like a piece
of pork or something, I'm like fucking- (laughing) - See what I mean? This
guy's is so fucking- - Those are fighting words. - This guy gets two million subs, he changes, man. (laughing) No more hotdogs!
- You used to be humble, Garnt.
- No more spam for Garnt. - Can I talk about one
thing that I'm not a fan of in Japanese cooking culture, which is not really widespread? But okay. So, we're in a ryokan, okay? - [Joey] Okay. - And we have this mini grill and we have this mini grill next to us. Right, okay. And they put a shell fish on the grill. - Abalone.
- Abalone. They put the shellfish on this grill and we're all sitting next to each other. And then the fish, the shellfish
starts dancing and turning and I'm just like, hmm, okay. Are shellfish meant to do
that when they're dead? And then it, it looks like it's trying to crawl off this grill. And then it goes from, I slowly start to realize
that shit's alive. I'm watching something being burned alive in front of my eyes, and you
expect me to eat this shit?! - Yeah, because you
know this shit's fresh. - That shit was amazing. Isn't it like $50 apiece?
- Yeah, do you know why it was amazing? Because
it was alive two minutes ago. - There's fresh food, and
then there's witnessing a fucking murder before I'm about to eat. - It's a fucking abalone, who cares? It's not like you knew this abalone. It's not like watching a friend die. - This man's a meat eater and
now he's fucking complaining that a shellfish dies in front of him? - No, no, no, I'm like, I'm fine. Would you kill every animal that you eat? Would you kill a cow? - Yeah, but like- (laughing) - That's a fucking lie! You're sitting here, being like, "Oh no, this shellfish died."
- This poor abalone! - You telling me that you'll
kill a cow and eat it? You would kill a cow? - I need to be mentally prepared. - Mentally prepared?
- Yes, yes! - For a fucking shellfish?! - You eat all of this meat
like it's nothing, bro. You never think about it, bro. You can't just sit here
and then pick and choose when you see a little thing squirming in front of you, being like, "Oh, well, I guess now I
have a problem with this." Someone should do something about this. - I know an animal needs to be killed in order for me to eat and everything. If I need to kill an animal
to eat it, I'll fucking do it. But I need to be in the mental headspace, but when I'm sitting down at a restaurant or something like that- - Fuck it, we're getting the chicken, bro. I wanna see him kill it. - It's not the only time it's happened, 'cause a few weeks ago, I
went to this teppanyaki place, which, teppanyaki is like a flat grill and a chef cooks the food. - Oh yeah, I like that, I like that. - Fucking amazing. - Great that someone
else cooks it for you. (laughing) - But I remember I was
sitting there with Sydney and on the opposite side, the other people had
just ordered lobsters. And so what happens is that
they get the freshest lobster. They have the tank with
just lobsters in it. And they pick a lobster and the chef puts the
lobster in front of them, and it's fucking trying to crawl around. I'm like, this is a fresh fucking lobster. Now I've seen lobsters being prepared by fucking Gordon Ramsey and shit. He puts the knife in the spinal
cord and kills it instantly. But not at this fucking restaurant. This fucking restaurant
presents the lobster, it's crawling around,
and the customer's like, "Yes, this is a fresh
lobster, this looks amazing." And the chef goes like, "Okay, brilliant." Puts the lobster on the grill and you just see it being fucking cooked and it's trying to fucking crawl away! - To be fair, I'd rather see that, than when you go in
those shitty restaurants with those obviously dead
lobsters in the tank, that are barely fucking alive 'cause they've been
suffocated in their own shit. I would rather the lobster probably have quite a painful death, but it's over and pretty fast, you know? It probably tastes better too and it's not poisoning its friends. 'Cause when a lobster
dies in that tank, bro, all those lobsters are contaminated. - I see the lobster
squirming really rapidly, I'm like, "Okay, this is
a healthy, young lobster." (laughing) - That's a healthy boy. - What are you gonna do? Fucking take it out back and
put a bullet in its head? Garnt, what do you want? - Yes, please! - No!
- Kill it first, kill it! - No! Who cares? - Kill it before you
fucking burn it to death and give it a few minutes of agony. I don't know, I don't know. - This is how vegans are born. (laughing) This really is how vegans are born. - This guy is the same guy who
would sit there and be like, "It doesn't taste fresh enough. Let me murder the cow myself. Let me grab the meat
from inside its loins." - I don't know. If I know that I'm just
gonna witness a murder before a meal, I'm like,
okay, let me prepare myself for this.
- I'm pretty sure they can't feel pain though, or anything. I'm pretty sure they can't feel pain. - I don't know if they
can feel pain or not, That's beside the point
that I'm trying to make. - I don't know if they feel pain, but I'll still always remember, more than the flavor
of that abalone we had at that ryokan, is his face. (laughing) It was incredible. It was like you witnessed
a box of kittens die. It's just a fucking abalone! - Because I have never seen
any fucking living being just squirm right in front of my face as I'm about to eat it, I guess. You can see the realization
on my face when I'm just like, "Ha-ha, we're grilling meat. Oh, it's moving. Why? Why is it moving?" I remember asking you guys,
"Why is this thing moving? Is this alive?" - And then I straight up
said, "Yeah, it's alive." - I'm just like, "Oh, it's alive." I'm just watching something being killed. - It didn't look very
appetizing, I will say. 'Cause isn't it referred to as a pussy? 'Cause it looks like one. - It does look like a
bit of a vagina, yeah. - It does, yeah, 'cause they- - Abalone just does look like a pussy.
- They have a nickname for in Japan where like,
men call it something. - Yeah, really?
- Yeah, I think some Japanese told me that, yeah, it's
famous for looking like it. So it doesn't look appetizing enough. And then it dies in front of you. - Imagine a squirming vagina on- (laughing) on a grill. - I wanna get monetized, Joey, goddammit. - You're the one that brought
up the fucking vagina, I didn't even know that shit! - But two of those words together in combination sound disgusting. - What, squirming vagina? - Joey, stop! Sabrina, can you fucking
sensor that shit, please? (laughing) Do we have any other food
topics? Anything else? I'm trying to think of,
there's gotta be something else before we end this. - There's a lot of Japanese food out there that I feel just gets
completely swept under the rug. Because, again, the
whole Western perception is ramen and sushi, that's it. That's all Japan has to offer. - Okay, okonomiyaki is okay. Okonomiyaki is like- - You take that back, motherfucker! You fucking take that shit back! - Okonomiyaki is like a
good pasta in Elsewhere. It's like a carb, filling and it's very, you can't really get mad
at pasta most of the time. That's okonomiyaki. - You're saying a lot of shit for someone in slap distance. (laughing) At least Garnt is on the
other side of the table, but I can just fucking- - Okonomiyaki, which is, how
do I explain okonomiyaki? - It's a savory pancake. - That's exactly my point,
it's just a savory pancake. And it looks better than it tastes. 'Cause you see okonomiyaki and it's like the fucking
"Shokugeki" food porn. You could, you could watch this thing and jack off to it, basically. But when you actually
eat it, it's just like, "Ah, this is... This should be up on a fucking painting." - I'm offended, I quit this podcast. (laughing) just because I've never heard anyone, every time I've taken
someone from overseas to an okonomiyaki place, they've had the "Food Wars" experience. - It's just street food though. - It is a street food, but it's probably the best street food you can have. I will happily take an
okonomiyaki over a yakisoba. In my opinion. - Maybe...
- No, I'd take a yakisoba. - As much as I love yakisoba as well, don't get me wrong, all
street food is great. Okay, so then, I will- - It's all kind of meh-tier for me. - Yeah, because it's B-grade food. It's street food, of course
it's not gonna be like, "Oh my god, this is the
best meal I've ever had." It's just there to fill your stomach. - In no world, if a Matsuya is nearby, am I not gonna choose- - Matsuya is the
definition of B-grade food, what are you talking about? - Yeah, but that's what I'm saying. It's the king of B-grade.
- The only difference between Matsuya and street food is
that Matsuya has a logo. (laughing) That's the only difference! - It's comfortable, man, it's comfortable. Yeah, sure, I saw a cockroach run across the floor one time. I don't give a fuck,
the food tastes amazing. - Okay, so then if Matsuya
started making yakisoba and okonomiyaki, would you eat it? - No. - Well then what the
fuck's the difference? - 'Cause dude, the beef bowls. If we're talking B-grade food in Japan, beef bowls and pork bowls are the king. - Oh yeah, of course. But you're not gonna get a beef bowl-
- I rest my case, gentlemen. - But you're not gonna get
a beef bowl and a pork bowl at a fucking summer festival. You're gonna get an okonomiyaki or a yakisoba or teppenyaki. - When I get to summer festival, I'm like, "Yo, this is sick. Google maps, where's the nearest Matsuya?" (laughing) - I never want to go to a
summer festival with you. We're just gonna end up
in a fucking Matsuya. (laughing) - I remember when we went, I think Aki got all the
fucking weird seafood? I'm like, "Oh, that's cool, that's cool." Let's go to a restaurant. (laughing) - As the certified
Japanese person here, Joey, - That's what I am now. I'm the certified Japanese
person of "Trash Taste." That's all I am. - Yeah, why is anyone taking
my opinion on food, I'm white. - What are the Japanese
dishes that people should know outside of just ramen and sushi and, now we've mentioned tsukemen? - Yeah, I feel that,
again, it's a lot of like, I mean, we've already
touched upon a lot of them, like tsukemen is one, sukiyaki
is definitely another one. - Yakitori? - Yakitori, just a lot of, oh
shit, a lot of street food. Just B-grade street food. You know, as much as you
guys say that it's mid, I reckon not enough
people try okonomiyaki- - Here's the thing
- Oh, I will, I will, - I will destroy an
okonomiyaki, don't get me wrong, but I'm not gonna feel happy about it. (laughing) - Here's the thing, right. I feel like moving to
Japan has just completely shifted my perception
of what good food is, because you gave me this shit
when I come from England, everything's S-tier. Everything in Japan is S-tier compared to what you can get England,
and then you live here, you're like, "Man, there's
different tiers of S-tier." - There's like a single S-tier,
there's a triple S-tier. - I saw an article
shared around on Twitter. It was basically why does
Japan and Switzerland have such a high baseline
for what should be standard? In terms of just everything in life? Especially food, just public
transport, daily living. Just everything in life has
such a high minimum requirement in Japan. In the UK, it's like I
could pay a 100 pounds and get a fucking garbage meal. - Yeah.
- Right, right, right. - In Japan, it's just not gonna happen. - Yeah.
- If you pay more than normal here, you will
just get something good. - You'll get an experience. - I've never gone to a restaurant here where I paid more than the
baseline and been disappointed. - Yeah. - And even then, like I said,
the Matsuyas and the chains and the really average stuff, it's so good that anywhere you go in Japan
if you're not from here, you'll probably be
really satisfied with it. And fuck, it must be awful being Japanese and traveling overseas and being like, "Wait, this restaurant was shit. I just paid a 100 pounds
and it was garbage." - How is this legal? - Yeah. They know it's shit, right? Yeah, of course they do. - They don't give a shit though. They don't give a shit, they don't care. - Yeah, I don't know, it's
just really interesting. And yeah, that is the
baseline I think of why, when anyone asks you what
is your favorite thing about Japan?, I'm sure
we can all agree that it's probably top three of food. - The food, yeah. - The food is amazing. - I knew I was gonna like
the anime or whatever. - Of course. And yeah, is hambagu on its own a devastation to hamburgers worldwide? Yeah, it is, but is it
still gonna be better than any other country that does it? Honestly, yeah, it is.
- Yeah, it will. - It's gonna be better,
I'll admit that much. - That's the thing is that
I think a lot of people who haven't come to
Japan will know nothing about the Japanese food culture here think that when people say the
food is just better in Japan, I think people just quick to be like, oh, they think Japanese
food is better in Japan. Of course it is. No, no, every food is better in Japan. - Let me just tell you like this. It just don't miss, okay? No matter where you go in Japan, no matter where you go
in Japan, you don't miss. - And even foreign foods, Italian food has such
a unique flavor here, but in a really good way. The way I see it is Italian food in Japan is the way that New
York pizza is to pizza. - Yeah. - It's a totally different take on it that's still really good.
- It still works, it still works.
- It's really good. And I feel like it's the same way with a lot of the food
that they have here. And so when people ask,
"Oh, can you get authentic?" It might not be authentic,
but who the fuck gives a shit if it's authentic? If it tastes good, it's
amazing, who cares? - I mean, we've recently found
an Indian curry restaurant. - It's very authentic. - It's authentic and it was
also still really fucking good. - Amazing. - Destroyed my fucking stomach, like a proper Indian should. - The naan was perfect naan, amazing. - If I'm waking up the next day and I'm not destroying my fucking toilet, that's not a proper Indian. - It's not a good curry. - It's not a proper Indian. - I wanna be doubting
it every single moment til it's in my mouth. Then I'm like, I made the right decision. - Yeah, if I wake up in the morning and I don't know if
it's a fart or a shart, that's how you know it's
a good curry, right? - And that's been that episode of (laughing) - [Joey] Hey, let's say
thank you to all the patrons who help make this show come to life. - I will say if you ever do come to Japan, please get a hambagu, just so
you can finish this debate. - [Joey] Honestly, just
give anything a go. - Maylene pointed something
out to us before we end, unagi. Unagi is god tier.
- Eel. - Oh my god, oh my god. Something we all agree on. Do we all agree on? - Yes, eat the unagi, eat the unagi. - Unagi is, you explain. - Unagi is like a boiled
eel and then it's grilled in this beautiful sauce. - Yeah. - I don't even know how to describe it. And they just serve it on the rice and, don't get me wrong, it's
very expensive, it is. - But it is worth the price. - It's a summer food and it is, you eat it and you feel clean, you feel happy, but you're
getting that fillingness that you get from other stuff. It's so good. - It's so weird, 'cause eating Unagi is in the middle of eating fish and meat. I can't explain it. It feels like a fish, but
it is filling like a meat. - It sits like a meat. - It sits like a meat. - Eel sounds like something that I think a lot of Westerners,
I know if you told me eel, I'd be like, "I don't wanna eat eel." - Yeah. - But it, it falls apart, it
doesn't taste fishy at all. It's so good and yeah,
okay, it's expensive. I think when we went to one- - We went to a really fancy one where you paid 60 bucks for one. - I paid fucking 68 bucks for an eel. I know that's too much,
I know that's a lot. But my brain just turned off. I didn't look at the price, I wanted the large one,
give me the large one. It was two and a half eels
of this and I was like (moans)
- It was really fucking good. It was really fucking good. - And this rush is so fucking good. And if you come here during the summer, I highly recommend it. I think it is by far the
best summer food in Japan. - Easily.
- I don't think there's anything close to it. Winter food, a lot of
heavyweight contenders, bro, but in the summer, I
think unagi's the king. - Yeah, I agree.
- So in summation, if you ever come to Japan,
apart from the usual of ramen and sushi that
you're gonna try anyway regardless of what we said- - You can still get it in the winter. - Get unagi, you can never
go wrong with that; tsukemen. - We need more people
in the cult of tsukemen. I need to build this cult! - The cult of tsukemen! - Sashimi, get sashimi. - This is the only cult that
you'll thank me later for. - For me, don't get curry, no
matter where you get curry. - Yeah, you can get curry.
- Try it, try it, just try it. - If you've never tried
curry before, try it. - Japanese curry.
- Japanese curry, but if you've have tried Curry before, to me, it's gonna taste exactly
the same as everywhere else. - Soba, try soba, some health noodles. - Try soba. - Udon, just to confirm you don't like it. - Bottom line, there's
way more to Japanese food than ramen and sushi. There's so much more and I guarantee everything you'll try here is either gonna be some
kind of positive experience or just something life changing. - Yeah, before we end it, I wanna say that when you eat food here, you almost wanna cry because you just feel like someone cares. You feel like someone really cared. - I almost did cry when
I fucking ate tsukemen! (laughing) We've already talked about that! - All the food you're like, "Fuck man, someone really fucking cared about the quality here." And if that doesn't make you
tear up every single time you have a bite of food, I
don't know what will, man. - I never thought I fucking
almost cry over fucking noodles, but here I was. - Yeah, and it's the
same thing like fruit. They have that saying of the
reason why it's so expensive is because so much love is put into it. You do really feel, I
know it's cheesy as fuck and I think it's dumb as
fuck when they say it, but when you eat that food, you do feel like every single step of
the process, everyone cares. - For some reason it's just a marketing ploy everywhere else, but in Japan, you actually
genuinely feel like, "Okay, yeah, it might be." - You feel the love. - Yeah, you feel like it's pride. There's so much pride in
every single piece of food that you eat and you can just taste it. And just honestly, when you
come here, go on Google Maps, If it's over four stars,
it's gonna be amazing, I guarantee it, just go
everywhere, trust me. 'Cause they are fucking strict with their ratings.
- 'Cause when you compliment the chefs, they actually appreciate that. - This is the only place
where I've actually wanted to be like do the
meme where it's like, can you call the chef over? - I need to shake his hand or something.
- I gotta shake this mans' hand, man. This man's done a masterpiece. - Yeah, like if I ever
get the opportunity, I thank the chef, like, (speaks Japanese) I think that's everything
we wanted to talk about. I can't believe the most
heated podcast we've ever had- - Was about fucking meat. - Was about meat. - Remember how this conversation started with me being pescatarian? - This made the school days debate like baby mode, man. - I just feel like it should
never have been a debate, 'cause it's just not even a point. - Hey, you know what? You can start the debate
over in the comments. We're gonna love looking through those. (laughing) Or you can do it on our
Twitter or subreddit, which is, as always, down in the description below. So meme the fuck out of
our heated meat argument. - Will you beat our meat argument? - That was awful, I feel bad for laughing. - Thank you for all the
Patreons, you are amazing. This guy is my favorite. - Thank you for 500K and all
the fucking milestones we hit, and this has been "Trash Taste, and we'll see you guys later. - Let's go smash a tsukemen. (speakers talking over one another) - I'm ready to fucking cry again. (gentle electronic jingle)
