Teachers, What's The Most Disturbing Conversations You Overheard? (AskReddit)

teachers have read it what weird / disturbing conversations have you overheard in a class you were teaching I've worked as a substitute teacher off and on for years when you are a substitute kids often don't care what they say in front of you because you are gone the next day I have heard middle school-aged girls discussing proper [ __ ] technique I have heard a group of elementary aged students discussing the dead body they found in the woods I have heard several times at all different ages groups of kids discussing drug deals and where to get the best stuff but by far the most fed-up thing I have been involved in was another group of middle school-aged girls discussing me and what I would be like in the bedroom I'm male and marginally attractive basically they were sizing me up and talking about all sorts of rather graphic things toward the end of the day when I asked them why on earth they would be talking about this sort of stuff at their range they gave me a blank stare and just laughed I have tons of stories about being a substitute if anyone is interested I've been doing this 15 years so I have a few yeah too bad you didn't ask for things like witnessed semicolon - close bracket this one sort of counts I guess we were on a field trip to SeaWorld in San Diego I teach less than an hour inland this kid had dreads and moved to our school from Compton or somewhere mid-year I treated him well showed him how smart he was and tried my best so we are on the bus and the kids obviously nodding off poor kid can barely keep his eyes open and I know his parents don't make him go to bed he looks back at me and says mister please don't let me fall asleep I've never seen the ocean conversation between two ten-year-old males in my class I'm going to punch you yeah well I'm going to sock you yeah well I'm going to beat you up yeah well I'm going to send a letter to your parents and pretend it's from a doctor and I'm going to tell them you have cancer um Wow not a teacher but I once walked past a classroom with the door open and I catch the final snippets of this notoriously should teacher going off at a don't you ever bring a knife into my classroom ever again so I'm thinking something crazy must be going down and being my curious self I walk into the classroom and say whoa what's going on Sara we called our teacher sir and in this I see Professor Snape voice he says this student has brought a concealed weapon into my classroom this is most serious most serious indeed I turned to the kid and asked him if I can see the knife he gets out of this tiny craft knife and starts crying i T told him it was F for art class we are cutting B balsa wood next period anyway at that point I started laughing and told sir to lighten up he was later fired for professional misconduct unrelated incidents but that guy was the biggest fuck-up I've ever met forget where I was going with this other than I was initially disturbed and then confused and then in hysterics also that story was pretty [ __ ] I should stop typing sorry all carry on this just happened to me the other day I was substituting at a school I work part-time at it's a Catholic all-girls school which may be important after I had told the students what they were to work on I said they could shatter little so long as they were working well about halfway through the period I start hearing this girl talk louder and louder it turns out she was venting her frustrations with her boyfriend it was something along the lines of he can only last five minutes it's so frustrating I always yell at him and tell him to go longer but he's like I can't baby it's hard and I'm like [ __ ] seriously I know you can hold it [ __ ] I can do this better by myself I was in shock I glanced over to where they were talking and I think they saw that I could hear what they were talking about so naturally I quickly looked away and continued to browse reddit we had a woman from the health department come into the biology classes every year to help us teach sex edition it was sort of a collaborative slash community outreach thing it was nice because the kids could have a change of pace learn from someone different for a while and the instructor would have more latitude to deal with any problems that might crop up while teaching sex ed to 15 year olds there was one flaw in the plan though the sex ed teacher happened to be an extremely attractive young woman she was in her early twenties and kind of had a supermodel thing going on so the pastime of every class was for the young man to try to get her to say something dirty by asking innocent seeming questions most of the time we let this slide hey they were asking questions right that's a good thing and maybe someone didn't know the answer so one day this kid who has never asked a question in his life points his finger at a sentence in the workbook gets the most hilarious theatrical official look of confusion look on his face and raises his hand yes Terrance MS cross what is intentional incorrect pronunciation our null sex here it says oral vaginal or on all sex what's that you shit-eating grin I've never seen her get flustered before don't know why this one got to her I imagine she'd been asked this question a thousand times she started stammering though so I stepped in this kid's line of sight between he and her and exclaimed and my most loud and helpful manly voice I'll take this miliseconds cross you see Terrance anal sex is when he starts waving his hands he doesn't want to hear another dude explain to him what anal sex is you know what mister the radius that's all right I but Terrance you asked a question you must be curious I need to give you this information if you asked a question like that and then didn't want to hear the question I might start to think you were deliberately trying to interrupt my class we need to talk about anal sex Terrance long silence heaving sigh hand on chin Terrance is not happy but Terrance will listen so as I was saying anal sex is any sex involving the anus if you guys remember the chapter on digestion the anus is the exit of the digestive system the colloquial term you would all use his butthole away.this most typically works is a man takes his penis and places it in the anus of another man a few homophobic groans at this point or a woman you just have to be careful with anal 6 and be sure to use a condom because if you don't you can get tearing in the tissue around Uranus this can lead to increased chance of contracting and standard and as you might imagine other sorts of nasty infection the reaction of the class to my mention of anal tearing was particularly animated I think a couple of kids grabbed their butts as I'm finishing up my explanation I walk past the front row a young lady is sitting there and she mutters to herself I think I'm the only one who caught it amidst the commotion well I'm never doing that again I'm an aide and spent most of the day grading papers and helping second grade kids I help in an accelerated class so the students writing is pretty advanced for their age I was reading an essay and even though this isn't exactly weird or disturbing I thought it was funny that a student wrote I went camping with Evan his family I think my daddy and her mommy like each other pretty sure Evan is Monas married because she came in one time and was wearing a wedding ring I hear crazy things some happy and some sad I was in a classroom during a show-and-tell but mostly tell time in which a student explained to the class that she doesn't like it when daddy makes her touched him needless to say this was reported and she is now in a different home and sometimes you overhear the best things one of my students was getting picked up early I overheard him say but mom I don't want to miss milliseconds passwords do not match his class and one more I teach at multiple schools to middle school students were separated when they left elementary school they are both mentally impaired and have a bazillion medical conditions but these two girls write each other letters talking about loving one another and how much they miss each other they tell anybody who will listen about their GF page keep photos of them together in their work areas and lockers passing their correspondence back and forth has pretty much made my year a little girl asked me if I had cat eyes I told her I did because my dad was a cat she believed me same girl asked me if I had ever seen a movie for adults only not liking where this was going at all I replied no and suggested we get back to reading she then proceeded to tell me how she found one in the back of her mom's closet and then acted out a porno scene was smoking on the back porch with my roommate and out of nowhere the same girl pokes her head up over the wall and yells hey mister moved out of that place real quick last year one of the guys in at my school was in life skills class the kind for reluctant learners he got angry at a girl who had rejected his affections and started yelling at her when the teacher told him to sit down he grabbed a roll of paper towels from the back of the room lit it on fire and threw it at the front of the classroom saying this is what I think of your class while the teacher was distracted he pulled a knife on the girl probably cold and done serious damage but one of the kids who was a massive stoner and who I had always laughed at for never amounting to anything tackled him and saved the girl's life I teach 7th grade language arts and I had one particularly bright class in which I thought it appropriate to teach them the game because I knew they could keep up one day this conversation unfolded students I hate writing I want to go home and play video games me Oh what kind of games do you like student oh man too many to name me like the one you just lost class loses their shirt the next day I realized I had created a monster same student-teacher can't we play a game or something me sure what game same student the one you just lost class fool oh I had a physics teacher who would eventually get off topic really easily he taught us about the Doppler effect one day it progressed like this explains what the Doppler effect is gives us the example of a car driving by quickly the room noise dropping in pictures it passes tells us of his history of speeding tickets often 4:20 over one time I made it all the way through Kentucky in like an hour and a half it was a narrow a section like 200 miles we were doing like 120 the whole time never got caught I was on cocaine at the time though no way I'd do something that stupid sober cocaine screws you up though I don't recommend it no what's awesome though opium in like 5-10 minutes it progressed from explaining the Doppler effect to telling us how opium is awesome paraphrase cuz it was a while ago and I don't remember specifics but the math checks out on his Kentucky trip Community College is awesome my mom is a teacher she once told me a story about a second grader she had she worked special education in a rather inner-city establishment where a daily snack was provided for the students one day she asked a behaviorally challenged little boy why he was not eating his broccoli for snack time he said miss I dig this broccoli cept it tastes like ass I have posted a few on other people's comments but a few others I heard a fourteen-year-old girl saying [ __ ] that I wasn't about to show up to that [ __ ] sober she was a classy girl having spent all summer on house arrest about 90 pounds always picking fights I had one girl call me over because her book was vandalized with the word juice from that day on whenever the class got loud she'd say jizz and hope I couldn't tell it was her I had to fight not to laugh she and I are friends now during a standardized test where a group of girls were seated near each other in small round tables the girls kept calling me over to ask questions I found out later that whichever girls I wasn't facing were making grabbing motions towards my butt I was doing a teaching experience type thing at a local primary school used to want to be a teacher I was in a grade 2 class so this is all the six-year-olds and such I was helping this little girl with no friends while helping I wondered why she had no friends because she was really nice anyway while waiting for her to complete this bit of artwork I turned around to hearing a bunch of the other kids engaged in some serious discussion without trying to be obvious about it I decided to try and hear what they were talking about to try and find out why this girl I was with his so different to everyone else or why no one else wanted to be friends with her these six year olds I was eavesdropping on four of them to be precise were talking about and in-depth different sex positions in kama Sutra I was shocked at first so I decided to ask them what they were talking about as it turns out most of them learnt this from listening to their parents talk about so just a small tip watch out what you say around your kids their minds are like sponges whatever you say they will probably repeat and to a bunch of other kids too shocked at the conversation I just turned around about to tell the actual teacher and girl I was was said that's why I don't want to be friends with them I couldn't help but laugh intermediate teacher here most disturbing a student telling a classmate he was going to stab him in the neck with a fork while he was sleeping and then set his house on fire weirdest we were talking about proportions and had been using abbreviations for units M centimeters yards feet etc I put up an example that was something to the effect of if a grocery store sells five muffins for two dollars how much is each muffin the following conversation took place in the front row student 1 how do you abbreviate muffin student 2 I dunno um muff I'm not sure how I managed not to crack up the other stuff I hear are mostly about drugs and usually about parents using them although I had a girl where a pot leaf necklace one day or some new sexual thing that they've just discovered and think that either they're being sneaky or be I don't know what it means I'm a relatively new teacher though so I'm sure there will be a lot more to come I told this one on reddit a couple of days ago I have a few students in my class who know each other and rip on each other one student's parents are from Africa he was up milling around in while they should have been working he walked to the trashcan then just started pressing the drinking water button I like to be sarcastic and I said student's name quit wasting water some people in this world don't have the luxury to waste it to this a student piped up and said yeah I'm going to have to tell your relatives in Africa what you are doing that one is in my top five for my career PS the kid still hasn't learned he still simulates [ __ ] and I had to kick him out when he was talking about porn sites I've also had kids talk about felonies and the like I also get a lot of weird questions who invented the word slow did we have her achoms back then does the extra credit have to be white to receive credit I'm currently working on a degree in math education and last semester I had a literacy class at a middle school I had a group of sixth graders all girls and we were eating a section of hatchet beige had to come up with a question and then answer it as a group one girl asked how the others would react in bronze situation stranded in the world without food or water they came up with a plan that involved building a makeshift bow and arrow and a knife hunting down birds and small animals preparing them finding clean water and starting a fire to stay warm I was pretty impressed until the conversation devolved into a 15-minute discussion on how Canadians a moose

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Keywords: teachers, most disturbing, most disturbing conversations, disturbing conversations, overheard, teachers of reddit, reddit, askreddit, askreddit funny, top posts, top posts of r/, r/, r/askreddit, reddit top posts, reddit cringe, comedy, reddit compilation, top posts of all time, askreddit question, askreddit top posts, ask reddit, askreddit reading, subreddit, reddit stories, best of r/askreddit, funny reddit, best reddit posts, best of reddit, ToadFilms, pewdiepie

Id: jp3zuIbT_IQ

Length: 17min 0sec (1020 seconds)

Published: Sat Sep 14 2019