Straight People, what do you want to ask LGBTQ+?

our slash ass credit by Reddit and chill straight people what do you want to ask about the lgbtq+ community that you wouldn't ask in real life I know it's none of my business what a trans person has in their pants but if I'm on a dating app or something isn't it a little bit my business when is it okay to ask if one answer is kind of a deal-breaker for me is it wrong for that to even be a deal-breaker we mostly don't put hey we're trans in our bias because there's a lot of chasers that fetishize trans people it's not wrong to ask politely what genitalia the person has before dating I do see it sometimes but I assume it's not the norm because of safety concerns luckily it hasn't come up yet I just always feel a little guilty for wondering trans woman here pre-op if somebody was uncomfortable with the fact it still exists that's fine I understand if it's a deal-breaker you may want a sexual relationship and you K wise surgery wait times are upwards of like five years it's not discriminatory you know you like what you like and shouldn't be expected to feel otherwise so long as you are not an ass about it Hey I consider myself open and supportive of the lgbtq+ community but I really don't understand drag queens are they all gay and trans are some drag queens straight is a just dress up and funnel do drag queens have a serious side if someone is a drag queen please give me more info edit thank you for all the replies I have learned a lot pretty sure they're mostly just guys that like to dress up definitely gay and trans ones out there but 20 off sis and straight ones too if I recall correctly there was once a lesbian that pretended to be a drag queen she even fooled other drag queens a lot of drag queens actually accepts this lady drag queens it's just about camping the hell out of femininity really sis girls can do that too I'm older and have known a few people who married straight and even had children and then came out usually after a divorce for non-b people who have been in this situation did you believe you were straight or just felt so pressured by social norms and LGBTQ oppression that you just turned it off like a light switch I guess this question could actually apply to anyone who didn't just came out late but for those who never even explored our true side if you will I'm not out right now to my family and I definitely feel the pressure to do the Normand date guys so I have to imagine that's what it is for a large portion of people though possibility not even the majority or half I would guess that it's much more difficult in a more conservative environment than a very liberal area this didn't happen to me but it's pretty close to why my parents split up my mom and dad married while my dad was in the closet and she came out as trans when I was 10 or 11 my mom has issues with being lied to and they got a divorce my dad says that she tried to ignore being trans and tried to turn it off like a light but it didn't work so she would act hyper masculine instead she was very gruff and manly before coming out were pretty much the stereotypical big firefighter Hunter don't tread on me type in an effort to seem straight cisgender eventually she couldn't do that so started cross-dressing and taking hormones and secret until my mom found her pills and bras then she came out about a year later mostly she was just really scared she had realized she was trans literally right in the middle of the AIDS epidemic and we live in a pretty conservative part of America so she feared for her life if she showed any signs of queerness she's a lot happier now though when two men have sex how do they know which penis opens up to receive the other penis this is a jug from the office but also a real if extremely rare thing the answer is that the receiving penis requires a long process or gradual stretch and calyx stuffing with Peniel sounds and other objects jelly worms for fishing I hear before a can't accept another penis which is to be pretty small and it's time to get off Reddit and start my day my eldest son is gay shy and on the spectrum he'd like to meet someone serious who would love him for himself he's tried a couple a dating ups and is now afraid of them because of some of the people he's met that way is there a safe place for my son to meet other men who aren't just looking for a quickie so I understand your son is shy but maybe have him download meetup which I am assuming you don't know if you do might be is an app for meeting friends and getting to know folks this would be a great way for him to get to know someone without their being pressure for something more edit they're armed Kia Plus groups on their which I am sure would love to have him hang out in do cool events days in the park go-karts and etc thank you I'll suggest that app tell him he's got his phone for the app but until we can't afford a new computer cord the other one might have to wait thank you very much : happy to help hope he finds his love I have a friend from high school who was a male and is now a female when I talk about memories with them from before they transitioned which pronoun do I use or should I avoid them altogether we were close ish in high school but fell out of touch during college is it okay to use their past name when talking about things we did together edit row' I can't believe the response from everyone thank you for helping me figure out what to do and it made me realize just how ignorant I was on the subject just following up I shot her a text today asking to go grab lunch and catch up the overwhelming response from everyone was to just ask her what she would like so that's what I plan on doing I'll try and remember to follow up later if she is comfortable with me doing so I find myself in this situation too and I feel like it's just more respectful if you kept her pronouns as she and used her current name even when talking about the past Thanks it's hard for me to remember to switch since I have very few memories of her being her something that can help in this particular situation is to imagine if gender wasn't part of the equation by that I mean say you had a friend named Ashley years back but she goes by Emily now it had just be awkward to talk about her like Emily back when she was Ashley and it had just confused the listener with info that isn't really necessary to the story and if you accidentally called her Ashley you'll just catch yourself in the middle and say sorry Emily and move on just do your best to think about her as her and if you mess up just quickly correct yourself and don't make a big fuss out of it that's both the most respectful way and the least uncomfortable for you and all others involved my best friend I've known since elementary school is FTM love him to the moon and back but I'm never brave enough to ask him about his dating choices throughout his transition he been transitioning for the past five years our whole lives he has solely dated women but throughout his transition he has slowly started to be solely be interested in men he says it happens to a lot of FTMs I just want to understand what happens throughout the process that things change like that I went the other way MTF and went from being exclusively into women to I'm not really sure I describe my sexuality as a non-committal shrugging gesture now for me accepting I was trans ironically made me realize how little gender actually mattered and I think that had some impact on who I was attracted to I also wouldn't rule out hormonal differences having an effect but that's just a gut feeling and I have no evidence to back it up I think non-committal shrugging gesture deserves a place in the LGBT alphabet LGBTQ NCS GE I don't have any questions I hope you all live happy lives friend I hope you have a great day and also wish you a happy life does lgbtq+ means that when you defeat the final straight boss you get to restart the adventure with all the quips and skills unlocked nah it's the opposite coming out as trans basically switched on hardmode for me P wait yet isn't new game+ usually the hard mode like sure you still have all of your equipment and stuff but the enemies start out infinitely harder to compensate so it ends up as even more of a challenge everyone knows if you want a max-min ups you stop mail till 16 then hard swap after you get the height you want enroll girl at 80% to max both gender advantages but if you don't time it right it can muck up your stats forever is it joyful or demeaning to come out from my perspective it seems demeaning for a friend had come out to me as if they only some explanation for being themselves no one ins me an explanation for being themselves however it seems that folks in the community really enjoy having the moment to come out of friends and family this has left me feeling confused on how I should react should I get super excited hugs kisses or just calmly fist bump and say no need to explain love your regardless coming out is ducking hard it's a hugely pivotal moment and a lot depends on how the person I am coming out to responds it can be a moment of joy coming out as trans to me was a hugely powerful thing filled with so much excitement and opportunity but it's also ducking terrifying when I came out to my close friends it was scary as duck not because I thought they'd react poorly but because they could react poorly and these were people I was close to and whose friendship I valued extremely highly I'm happy with either response that you mentioned though some people get a little bit weird and over sited do what feels right for your relationship with that person if it's a chill bro who salt a relationship maybe a fist bump and a hug is right if it's a more emotional sort of relationship then a more emotional response might be appropriate the fist bump is a good reaction tbh it's mostly joyous relief with some exceptions of course since you're finally sharing an important truth about yourself and shedding the weight of a lie how much a burden it was being closeted beforehand will vary by person but it's almost always experienced as stifling frustration to some degree as a friend you don't have to react super emotionally casual acceptance is powerful so treating them the way you previously did is likely the best course of action what they are usually looking for is confirmation that y'all a safe and supportive person so whatever that looks like from you is good if you want to kick it up a notch and your friend is clearly having an emotional moment of some kind when they're coming out to you you can matter thanks for letting you're sharing their important moment but don't force it just be true to yourself they're trusting you with their truth and you might as well return the favor I like this answer being chill and calm in these moments made me feel like I was being disrespectful now I'm seeing a different view on how the chill and calm reaction can actually be good much appreciated edit spelling is hard I have a colleague colleague has a female name that looks fair physically voice and work uniform provided by the company our male colleague also has a girlfriend I usually address colleague by name but we are not that close to ask which pronoun is better to use should I ask but just keep calling by colleague name we are not on the same area but work close edit college to colleague thanks for the correction English is not my first language edit - oh I'll be listening the pronouns their friends use and copy that we speak Spanish so we don't have neutral pronouns thank you all you see them while you're sure and ask politely when you get the chance and by politely I just mean asking what are your preferred pronouns as a posted are you a boy or a girl and other such variants are you a boy or a girl only acceptable if they work at a laboratories in Pallet Town normally I'd say to ask that if this person is presenting as male and do you think they're as sis man it might not be well received especially in a work context if the name is Ashley or Lindsay those are actually men's names or they were before there were women's names I'd first do a quick check online to see if their name is ever used for men next you could actually try just checking in with HR quickly I'm genuinely curious about the moment a person is sure they're gay ve T see I'm B and it took me a long time I was a late bloomer in all respects but I think I had interpreted my feeling towards other women as being some weird version of M beyond like kind of the way young kids sometimes idolize elder kids it wasn't until I was in my late 20s that I fully came to terms with being B and it was actually way harder and way more emotional than I would have expected especially given that I still mostly date men you are describing my current situation perfectly lol girl crush or am I just really gay backed when I was in the throes of questioning I asked more than one of my gay friends about their reckoning one of them said it built up until they just had to go do something Garry in retrospect having superhot dreams about women and wanting to play with boobs should have been an indicator I feel like I'm still figuring out dating women which is a bit of a minefield for me that whole how do you get experience for a job that requires experience problem but sex with women is just awesome all the time I'm like a real mid-thirties woman when I'm dating men and I'm like a nervous horny sixteen year old when I am dating women not exactly suave am i situationally gay I was talking to my wife of ten years me being what I consider to be a straight male anyway we were talking about transgender issues and she and a purely hypothetical way asked me if she came to me one day and said she felt she was in the wrong body and took the steps to transition e.t.c would I end our relationship I said absolutely not I'm attracted to her as person her kindness her personality her sense of humor not her physical body sure it helps that I'm physically attracted to her but I could imagine my life without her and could not bear to live that way we would eventually figure everything out as far as everything else goes but I believe while I haven't had any gay tendencies before that if my wife transitioned to a male I would remain attracted to him I think I'm situationally gay is this a thing wife to a trans woman here this exact situation happened I was in love with her formerly masculine self and never questioned she came out and boom I was fine a moment of shock but I still loved her and found her sexy at the end of the day isn't what gender I fell for it's w-h-o I fell for I married her without hesitation and we are deliriously happy I just say I'm queer you could identify as that or still straight or be or whatever that just sounds like heartwarming love to me red heart I wouldn't think too much about it as you are specifically attracted to your wife and not a men as a whole that being said I don't have a specific answer besides this you sound like an incredibly sweet and loving person and anyone would be lucky to have a spouse like you when people list their pronouns why do they write all three pronouns like ian is oshi her / hers wouldn't it be enough to just list Yoshi I consider myself an ally but I have always wondered about this writing Chiaki on a profile seems kinda weird and maybe hard to get what you mean by it the slashes and forms clarified the pronoun dunno people like three years it's the minimum required for a list from a one-question from this why do people who present as male and were born biologically as male include things like pronouns and their bow if they were born male and aren't intending on doing any sort of transition why is it necessary to include pronouns at all I'm sorry but as a gay dude you're all asking the most bubblegum sattva blanket questions half of these could be answered with a 20-second google here's my question do any other members of the LGBTQ feel that it's our marketing and political tool these days than an actual movement a little bit but I'd rather be treated as demographic worth marketing to than a vile rat that just needs to die and things are changing for the better slowly yes but that doesn't mean all of it is and pride is still very very important the fact that we're at a point where being pro-lgbt is profitable marketing wises profitable makes me happy shows progress in society and makes bigots mad but I'm not gonna suck any companies don't for doing something with rainbows what does the Q stand for it really depends on the person at least from what I've seen some people take it to mean questioning some people take it to mean queer queer is a very um Brella term but a lot of people avoid using it because it's being used as a slur for so long I knew it meant queer but I've always had a hard time putting my finger on what that means other than a slur I know it is being reclaimed but not sure of the meaning now edit the question being could you please enlighten me queer to me has always been a catch-all term used for people that don't really fit neatly into one of the other labels when does the abbreviation stop growing each time a straight person complains we add another letter GSM gender and sexual minorities has become popular over the years and I suspect it will become de facto in our lifetime GSM gender and sexual minorities has become popular over the years and I suspect it will become de facto in our lifetime and let's be honest about the time that non LGBTQ people start to know and use an abbreviation it'll change to something else hey if you anger the abbreviation another letter gets added being yourself and loving who you love E's I think at the core of the lgbtq+ community and that is wonderful I feel as though it has become trendy to essentially not be straight though I may be way off the mark but I have encountered more than a couple people who I would say essentially decide to not be straight and it's not a choice do people in the community perceive this at all and if so what are the feelings about it the main reason it seems like more people are gay is because more people feel comfortable coming out and being openly gay nowadays I personally do feel like there are people out there who think it's a trend and I don't like those people sexuality is fluid though so some sexualities could only be a phase or you could think you're into a particular gender but then have an ex perience with them and realize that you're not I do think that it's becoming more and more common to realize that you can be whoever you want now and that's great maybe I'm just hanging out with more gay people though lol I kind of think of it's the opposite of trend anecdote I'm 30 now and while on one hand I'm clearly bisexual on the other hand I'm significantly more interested in women and I'm not really interested in dating anyone that I'm for sure not gonna marry so I'll probably just be straight because it suits my boring self and my life goals just fine but I think had I understood that bisexuality was a real option when I was 16 I likely would have explored it though even now it seems like bisexuality is more frowned upon them strictly being into the same gender I think that for the past many centuries the queer community has represented the intersection of people who are attracted to the same sex and people who don't much give a damn what society expects of them now this society is becoming more accepting that is going to be increasingly people who are attracted to the same sex to some degree which I understand to be a surprisingly sizable group can you be an asexual and another one like bisexual gay at the same time because asexual is not having sexual attraction but can have feelings of love to another so I'm a bit confused if yes then is that classified as a be a sexual gay sexual or lesbian asexual a lot of a saero people I know use the split attraction model for example a female friend who's romantically interested in woman but is a sex show describes herself as on a romantic asexual so the exact terminology that people prefer very but that's definitely effect I think it would be like the romantic asexual home aromantic asexual etc basically just a romantic suffix to describe love but not sexual attraction backing this one up i'ma be romantic asexual romantic and sexual attraction are not the same thing you can be hitter a romantic and heterosexual obviously the jaw romantic and sexual attractions do not have to be the same if you are in a lesbian or gay relationship and your partner comes out as trans wouldn't that be a deal-breaker for many as in you got together with a woman because you prefer women if your partner transitions to a man can you still be equally attracted if a lesbian prefers butch lesbians but her butch partner transitions how does that work I realize this is probably a personal thing and each situation is different I'm just curious you're correct in saying that each situation is different it really depends on the people involved and there's no hard and fast rule there I think for most couples it wouldn't be an instant breakup granted some gay people have an issue with trans people and for them it would be but for most couples I believe it's are ok I'll support you in this video at some point I stopped being attracted to you than I will respectfully break up with you and we'll probably still be close friends there's not really an expectation to stay together if your partner completely stops being attracted to you in any way even though the fact that you used to be attracted to them probably helps you stay in to them a bit longer than you would but every couple I've heard about going through this house stayed incredibly close friends because they still love and care for each other just not in the same way ducking like and subscribe [Music] [Music]

Channel: Reddit & Chill

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Rating: 4.9407277 out of 5

Keywords: askreddit, Straight people what do you want to ask LGBTQ+?, reddit and chill, questions you want to ask LGBTQ+, lgbtq, people what do you want to ask lgbtq community?, people what do you want to ask lgbtq?, straight people, Q & A, Q & A LGBTQ+, askreddit question, questions you want to ask, askreddit top posts, real life questions, r/askreddit, did you know, gay, lgbtq questions, community, bis€xual, pans€xual, tranny, gay pride

Id: VbyZdcsZl7k

Length: 23min 4sec (1384 seconds)

Published: Tue Apr 28 2020