Ex-Spys, what have you done that should not be spoken of?

next spies what is something you have done that should never be spoken of I had to infiltrate and spy on a notorious child pornography ring it was the worst six months of my life I saw and heard a lot of things I didn't want to I had to seem interested in it but it made me want to claw my own eyes out some of the kids were barely three years old it was the job that ended my spying career I couldn't handle doing anymore after that I was able to bring the ring down I also purchase children and got them out as often as I could I tried to help as much as possible I often carried heavy magnets to erase memory drives the kids deserved better than to have the photos surfaced later in life I don't talk about that job to anyone other than the therapist I desperately needed after that being a spy seems really cool until you're staring at a child being hurt and there's not much you can do about it in the earlier days of my spying career I was assigned to follow a man that was suspected of building and setting off bombs this guy was a peculiar man he followed a very strict routine I could set my watch by this man it was fairly normal he would wake up at 7:00 shower eat breakfast work at his desk until 12:00 eat lunch go for a walk come home work until dinner eat dinner weed until 10:00 then he went to sleep fairly standard routine except once a week he would meet a woman in the park and they would play a game of chess he always looked very troubled during the games I took it as he was losing the woman was a nobody she was a single woman no kids she dated around like a normal single woman she would always give the guy a small slip of paper which I took to be her phone number she flirted with him relentlessly anyway one day the smoke alarm in his house goes off I rush in and he is dead on the floor gunshot wound to the temple it was made to look like a suicide the fire was set to get rid of evidence I put the fire out and salvaged what I could he had indeed been making bombs unfortunately he was only doing so because someone had his wife and kid the little slips of paper were messages from his wife saying that they were okay the last game he had with a woman she hadn't given him a paper he was very upset after that game he must have told them now after he had no proof his wife and child were alive we could have helped him had we not been so focused on him being the bad guy he was just a victim we eventually found his wife and child thankfully I wasn't the one to break the news to them that job sucks Mia Nazis are awful people most of them are cowards that will back down with a little force but others are just rotten to the depth of their souls I was asked to infiltrate to keep tabs on them and let people know if there was going to be violence some of the younger recruits were only there because their parents were I caught two of the teen boys kissing once they're poor faces when they saw me they thought they were dead they ran away and couldn't be found I had to say and do some awful things I had to take part in assaulting a young man I pulled my punches tried to do as little damage as possible thankfully I was able to sneak away and call the kid an ambulance he survived thankfully I was witnessed had more results and a sexual assault I hated being there eventually I was arrested and moved out of state I stayed out of the field for a while sometimes I really hate my job I'm posting this on a throwaway account I don't want this traced back to me I worked as a spy back during the beginning of the war in Iraq I was sent in to get intelligence on different groups I was very good at my job I was able to get information without leaving a trace one night I had to retrieve some info from the computer of a well protected man getting onto his property took a lot of effort in time I was able to pop open a window and get in without setting off the alarm I was in the middle of transferring the files when the door opened vested the man's eight-year-old son he looked confused for a moment I knew I had to act fast I quickly made my way over to the child I punched the key and knocked him out cold I carefully put the child back in bed and left I'm sure it gave the child nightmares that I couldn't get caught I felt really guilty about it afterwards he was just a kid stuck in the middle of a war he didn't cause after that I always found out if there were children in the house I didn't want to be caught off guard again this isn't my story but my grandfather's I found his journal after he died he was a spy back in World War III he wrote down all the missions he went on some of the things in his journal made me look at him very differently he was working undercover as a chef to a general he was covered Lee gathering information and passing it along to his contacts one day he received the order to execute the general and get out of Dodge he poisoned the entire family he put cyanide in their dinner and left just as it was served the entire family died except for the infant he helped plant bombs in the basement of a hospital this hospital wasn't a military hospital there were civilians in the building when it went up in flames he dressed up as a janitor he was given free rein of the basement he wired the bombs and ran he wrote that there had to be at least a thousand people in that building he kidnapped and held several children hostage he said he made sure they ate and whatnot but I'm sure some of those kids didn't make it back to their parents he didn't write the outcome of the kidnappings though some of them had a star next to the entry there was just a list of names at one point nothing mentioned about them just names I think it was a hit list but honestly I can't tell my grandpa was the nicest person I had ever known learning he did all this stuff really changed how I viewed him my grandpa killed innocent people and I don't know how to feel about it i tortured a man for several hours to get information out of him I kept him awake for days I fed him as little food as possible to keep him alive I pulled out fingernails and a tooth I broke a man to get information from him in the end after all that he didn't know anything I was given the wrong man i tortured and killed an innocent man I would like to say that I quit after that but I didn't I continued to work until I physically couldn't anymore I'm an old man now but in my younger years I was a spy for the American government I was tasked with getting Intel from a specific town I went in and engrained myself into the town I knew everyone and everyone knew me I was there to gather information about the town's people and their involvement with terrorists the higher-ups believed that the town was helping them hide in plain sight after months of living among them I didn't find anything much all I really found was that some of the residents were becoming sovereign citizens also somebody was running weed in that town I never found out who it was I commend them for being able to outsmart me I sent in a clean report I wasn't about to turn this town upside down for some weed and a couple of people who didn't want to deal with the government anymore when word got around that I was moving away are left with several pound cakes wrapped in plastic wrap best cakes I've ever had I helped another spy disappear she had gotten pregnant and needed out I found a safe place for her and set her up with a whole new identity she had accidentally gotten pregnant on one of her missions she was playing escort and slept with a mark for info she was furious to begin with but eventually saw it as a blessing she had wanted out of the game for a while but never had a good enough reason the baby became the reason she gave birth to a bouncing baby boy he's probably in his twenties now he will never know that his mother was a spy or that his dad isn't his real dad I'll always be his strange uncle that only shows up every once in a while I'm completely fine with that I was in a Middle Eastern country gathering info for the American government I kept to myself for the most part and didn't really interact with anyone I lived in a tiny apartment in a kind bad part of town I gathered a lot of info in my time there I was only three weeks from being pulled back when I got followed home I had just stolen some info and was making my way back to my apartment I noticed pretty quickly that I was being followed I knew this wasn't going to end well I cut down an alley in the guy tried to jump me I was able to disarm him I turned with my knife out to stab the guy I caught him in the left eye I pulled the knife back and his eye came with it he was barely eighteen just some dumb kid he ran off and I rushed to my apartment I don't know what the game of the kid I got pulled out earlier because of it though I had clearly been made I hate how they always send the young kids out to do this stuff they aren't prepared and always end up dying they are just barely adults as a spy you end up doing a lot of things you aren't proud of you do what needs to get done in order to get the job done any X buy that tells you that they don't have blood on their hands is a liar I've been terrible things in my life and will have to take the punishment for them once I go to meet my maker I've kidnapped children and held them hostage I've shot people in front of their families I've broken bones and knocked out teeth I permanently disabled people I've tortured people I've witnessed even worse things all those spy movies that show this job as being cool and the spies being handsome playboys a pure fiction this job is dirty and awful this isn't my story but the story of one of my relatives my great aunt was a spy and a part of Special Forces she and a small group of women who had men to their deaths they would wait outside the camps and flirt with the soldiers there they'd ruin lots of young men who were thinking that they were going to get lucky once they brought them in back to the house they would tie them down and get information out of them after the guy inevitably spill the beans they would kill them and dump their bodies outside of random bars they sent all the info they gathered in once they were able to help locate some missing soldiers one of man that they lured home was a guard to the lost soldiers they also were trained snipers with many kills under their belts they were a ruthless group of women I infiltrated a cult that was under suspicion for a handful of murders the cult seemed harmless enough they preached kindness and compassion even for the people outside of the cult they seemed like normal group of religious people at first it wasn't until I moved up in the ranks that I found all sorts of bad stuff there was a lot of sexual violence among the leaders mostly against young women these girls had to be just barely 16 I found out later that most of the girls were assaulted on their 16th birthday one man had brought his family into the cult his daughter had turned 16 shortly before they joined the man put up a fight when they came to collect his daughter for initiation he was dragged away I was part of the disposal crew for his body I helped load his body up into a truck and dump it on the side of the highway while we were away his daughter was initiated and his wife was married to someone else I reported the murder as soon as I could we brought the whole cult down in a matter of a few days it was one of the worst times of my life what made it all the worst was I got paired with a young girl for initiation thankfully the initiations were private affairs I went into a dark room with this girl I told her nothing was going to happen but she needed to act like it did when she left she was so thankful that she didn't even have to fake crying at least I was able to get around that I don't think I would have been able to live with myself if I couldn't have gotten around it I can't imagine hurting a child like that how these guys were getting off when these girls are sobbing their rise out is beyond me I'm so glad we brought them down the cult leader was charged with so many sexual assault charges his ghost is going to serve time I hunted and killed another spy I worked as a spy for a majority of my young adult life I was very good at my job my specialty was tracking people down I could find most people given enough time that is why I was selected to bring in a Rouge agent he had gone off the rails and decided that he was going to give our secrets to other countries this man was trained like I was he knew how to disappear I spent months tracking him down he moved around constantly every time I though I had him pinned I didn't I knew that eventually he was going to slip up it happened six months into tracking him he slipped up and let himself get caught on camera I finally was one step ahead of this guy I tracked him to a bar and then followed him home I waited until he was asleep and smothered him with the pillow it was a hard job for me considering that the man was a good friend of mine we had worked together for a very long time I would have trusted that man with my life had he not lost his mind he put so many people's lives at risk I had to kill him to keep us safe I didn't like it but it needed to be done I worked as a double agent I was only truly loyal to one side I was a trusted member of the other side I had put in the work to prove my allegiance I stood by as countless innocent people were tortured and killed I said information both ways making sure my lies were believable I worked as a double agent for years I spent most of my young adulthood running between the two camps I wasn't fully trusted on either side the good guys thought I was bad and the bad guys thought I was good I was very skilled at maintaining the system of falsehoods and misdirection I had built around me over the years in the end I definitely came out looking like more of a villain but the big man was defeated and the day was saved I did my job and I will forever be stuck with what I witnessed I killed my brother-in-law I shot him point-blank in the face I hadn't heard from my sister in a while which is unusual for her I stopped by to check in on her between jobs she had a giant bruise on the side of her face I asked her about it and she of course tried to lie to me about it I let it slide and then met my brother-in-law I had been out of the country for the time when they were dating and getting married so this was the first time I had met the man he tried to be intimidating the second he saw me I let him try it didn't work my sister invited me to stay for dinner and I accepted at some point I excused myself to the restroom when I came back this man had my sister backed into a corner whisper yelling at her even went to hit her I grabbed his hand and pushed him away from her he again tried to intimidate me I pulled my gun from the holster he lunged I shot he dropped dead I called the cops and explained what happened my sister was too much in shock to deal with it needless to say I didn't get arrested I dropped my sister of at her mom's and went to my next job I don't feel bad about it I grew up in a very impoverished area of Middle Eastern country I saw a lot of violence from the time I was young I cannot remember a day going by that wasn't marked by a death in the community I tried to stay away from that kind of life but ended up so far and I didn't think I would ever get out I got caught up in the wrong crowd and ended up in an extremist group I didn't like to fight so they sent me to places to get information or to pick up things slowly I was trusted to do more important things and gather more important info because I was such a mousy looking guy people didn't expect me to be up to no good people also liked to talk to me for some reason people had a tendency to just spill their guts when talking to me it was wonderfully easy for me to collect whatever type of info needed it was all fine and well until they asked me to kill someone it was just an old man but I couldn't do it they told me I was going to have to shoot him in front of his home I refused and ran I managed to escape the country and start over I never told anybody about me short lives my career it was a strange period in my life I don't know if they even came looking for me I probably wasn't worth the effort I never had anything happened that would suggest that they were looking for me I work as a spy in the early 90s I worked for the US government I received my instructions through a handler I went all over the world I think I've seen every country at least twice the travel is the only upside to being a spy everything else is awful I've had to torture people I mean really torture them I pulled out finger and toenails I've waterboarded people I've shocked people I've done all sorts of terrible things to get info for a while I convinced myself that it was someone else doing those god-awful things but it was me I did them I've killed people innocent people I followed order like I was supposed to it doesn't make it any easier it doesn't make their faces leave my mind don't become a spy the pain isn't worth it the emotional and mental scars are not worth it

Channel: Reddit & Chill

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Rating: 4.9010787 out of 5

Keywords: askreddit, Ex-Spys, Ex-spys what have you done that should not be spoken?, ex-spys what have you done that we should not know, What is something you have done that should never be spoken of, reddit and chill spy story, untold stories reddit and chill, reddit and chill, spy ask reddit, reddit spy, reddit ask me anything, true stories spys don't want you to hear, spys that reveal the truth about the agency, reddit ama, r/askreddit, reddit & chill

Id: be88aJZKFcg

Length: 18min 6sec (1086 seconds)

Published: Wed Apr 22 2020