UNHhhh Ep. 131: Straight People

[Music] yeah and just because i'm gay at the eagle doesn't mean i need you to look at me while i'm peeing some of us are just trying to pee mary not everything has to be look at my look at my besides you're gonna need both eyes and a friend's pair of eyes to get a full look at my piece 2020 is about giving up on gay people in general and backpedaling to the true monsters the heterosexuals yeah we're taking it back to the source hi i'm kate blanchette saying you want to [ __ ] me barbara trixie mattel and i'm so so sorry but i just cannot have a baby in this weather katya and welcome to the show where we talk about whatever we want because it's our show and not yours [Music] today is a topic that i hope we'd be able to avoid completely yeah i mean there are certain subjects in a person's life that have to be dealt with hopefully briefly painlessly but this is one that we've avoided for quite some time honestly the worst thing about becoming a famous drag queen i've had to face off with more straight people than i've ever had to in my life yeah but today we're talking about straight people straight people heterosexuality so we're talking about straight people but we're not talking about our straight fans yes do you know what i mean it's like you're you've got sick you've got special access you're you're you have a card you got a membership card yeah you're not if you're tuned into this and you're straight you're probably not a part of what we're doing yeah if yeah and if you've made it this far and your face hasn't looked like this like then you're not straight mama yeah and you're just heterosexual yeah you're not straight you're just heterosexual you like the straights okay well let's break it down so back in the day i went through a pattern in high school where fell in love with a straight guy sensitive straight guy who's like alternative fell in love with them about five or six guys hopelessly devoted to you okay you were in a backyard by the pool like olivia newton john singing hopefully yeah yeah and they were like why are you even at my house yeah why are you in my backyard and then i was like strange twist of fate today yeah yeah um and then i got over it i was like oh how many useless endeavors am i going to be embroiled in until i realized that i'm wasting my time and i could go out and live my life like gina davis i love gina davis i do too and she's also a um a very good archer yes and she's about 70 feet tall and i believe she's a genius it's like common knowledge and she's a genius genius davis yeah oh straight people there's just a problem there you know it's straight pasta until you boil it so when i think about straight people i i go to childhood trauma light trauma i am i think about being um forced to play football yes football for what basketball and downfall but like the straight guys have definitely come on to me they sniffed it oh yeah and it's always alarming and it's never in a situation where i'm turned on about to be turned on or like don't have somewhere to go one time i was outside of a gay bar and i told you about that time that guy was like you want to go to an alley you really pretty much i was like i gotta go yeah i walked then i walked home alone on foot very safe uh i was chased by a fedex truck chased by a fedex truck he went around the way and i had to run into my apartment he banged on my door for 20 minutes maybe he had a package for you oh that's right oh my god it was my sister's inhaler and now she's dead i gotta tell you i have so many straight men so many of them and i once you know um okay [Music] i i think i told you i one man had the gall to tell me after sex when all the makeup was gone that um if he saw me on the street he wouldn't be able to tell that i wasn't a woman after the makeup was off like all you know because i had all this came off on his ass i okay i love you he couldn't tell that you were a drag queen he thought you'd be a woman it was very dim in my apartment straight people who are into drag queens sexually they are more into they don't really we've talked about it they don't care that you pass as a woman they just they want some of the bells and the whistles they want the wig in the shoes i have full coverage pantyhose with a hole with the diamond note i mean you know what i mean to hide the scars it's like it looks like those outfits and also trashy all sheer black except cut out i have a photo can i show it i would love to see it so we got exhibit a yeah exhibit b and then seal of approval wait let me do this i mean i feel like we've spent the straight episode talking about our i don't like fetishized straight men no men are hot men i don't really care i find you hot but like call me old-fashioned i want somebody who wants to watch me yes and also like you're hot okay what else what's interesting about you and like what makes you interesting yeah do you get your brakes checked do you floss i want the information yeah you have your toes done um sometimes i think we fight so hard for our identity to be gay that we make straight people feel like if they do anything gay they lose their identity as straight when it's like but what the [ __ ] is that identity i'll just do it f girl it's like being white what's your culture yeah tiki torture yeah yeah but i just think of the oppression that we escape as gay people and i think of straight people living it forever um also also the fact that they do get married it means they come to the drag show isn't tip at all yeah so we'll take the money straight people oh performing for straight people is a different thing it's a different it's a different thing i mean when i see a straight guy i actually have a pretty good spidey sense about uh will i be physically assaulted if i get on his lap and grind my um uh palpable into his uh crotch oh we had a performer called mr lady and she she would uh violently lap dance people it's the injured son and um she would like the chair she would in the chair would move move move sometimes tip over she uh broke a girl's arm once they're there straight girl by the way when you're a dry queen and there's straight people in the audience the way that we adjust our numbers we're doing when we hear that straight people are going to be there is a testament to what we think of your intellect yeah like there's straight people here i'm going to pull out barbie girl yeah it's like okay it's a britney night yeah yeah because we know that we can't do anything that is off the beaten path at all or you're going to look at us like we have a third third eye yeah what is this sound it's not a top four i don't know yeah when stray men go to a drag show they are not in charge well i mean straight men especially white men they walk into a room as if they had built it it's insane but what do they say like i want all the confidence of a mediocre heterosexual white guy oh yeah oh yeah besides you ron you are lovely ain't nothing mediocre about you baby well we love you this none of this none of this applies to you i mean ron is an example of somebody who's gone above and beyond who's actually contributed to queer culture ryan is the absolutely would have been the next in line for my um unrequited romance streak i think he knows that since you tell him to camera that i would stick two inches of my tongue hr issue thank you for joining us sorry about it can't help it i'm gay although to be fair some of my the best fans that i have are straight men uh who found out about me and us through their girlfriends same and these people who i've interacted with they are and it's also weird to have straight guys be so nice to us at like at drag con there'll be couples and sometimes the husband is more excited to meet us in the girlfriend or sometimes the father oh the dad the dad is like i literally my ovaries explode right in the kid's face it's like it's amazing yeah we uh are fortunate to get to interact with that minority but the majority you know the thing that always occurred to me about straight people or straight culture it's it's so bland it just to me like looks like a black and white movie that would no sound and then gay is like cirque du soleil yes like gays don't have living rooms that say like live laugh love yeah that doesn't happen no i will say this though we're talking about straights like gays are so much better we know plenty of gays no gay people are rotten we always talk about like by erasure i think part of that is because if you're bi you'll tell people you're straight so you don't have to deal with all the the strings attached you know what i mean do you have any i do you have any idea how much i love bisexual men there was this guy this bisexual guy in college gave me crabs it's fine the crabs were by too but when i i i want to be i'm just going to be vulnerable he was bi and very sexually active and he'd be like we'd be having sex and he'd be like yeah i just this girl yesterday and i thought it was so hot yeah i don't know why is that gross no especially if he was like this girl like earlier today before you got here i love making me feel cheap did he slap you no he didn't slap me he gave me crabs which is sort of like the others yeah um so if you're feeling bisexual final thoughts um a straight road will often get you there fastest but you'll be sorry you did nope if you know a straight person stop yeah um um listen we all have moms and dads and they're probably straight they're not all bad no i came from a gay lake do you think the ratio of i was fished out of the water like this monster a toddler oh speaking of straight people let's hear some questions from twitter using the hashtag wow help me now i'd like to take a moment to answer some questions i have a friends with benefits deal with a friend now i started developing romantic feelings but i am afraid of having that conversation with him i am always unlucky in the romance department any advice on how to start this conversation hashtag wow help me okay so you ended with a self-defeating statement that's going to sabotage the whole game i'm always unlucky you've resigned yourself to defeat let's flip that script yeah um and then uh i don't know try it believe me if you have an inkling that they're not into it they're not don't flatter yourself yeah and i mean let me tell you something i have had situations where i've had repeat repeat um what do you call booty calls and um i won't do nothing besides i don't even really want to like eat food yeah or watch movies that's normal the first craigslist um no i'm sorry grinder date i had in florida this man made me watch 45 full minutes of a tv show i've never seen in my life but then to death of a lifetime it was the best one of the best sexes i've ever had but anyways you can have this conversation without having the conversation you just learn by doing don't you think yeah totally nothing gross to them be like so i'd like to take this step you know if someone likes you you can tell that's not necessarily true yes it is remember that server at hamburger mary's who's asking me what remember we were at hamburger mary's see fina and there was a server jimmy and we were like am i being i yes i am now i didn't see that what did it look like it was like every time he had to go out and serve a table he was looking in my direction was it like it was like every time this yes and like let's see let's say he's doing the aloha which is you know service industry the thing what's the aloha the computer that you use at restaurant oh okay and he would be like and then like as the attorney would look it's a lot of eye contact and believe me if you think you're imagining it you are because when someone likes you let's be honest you can tell you can tell i disagree i only disagree because of the the amount of times i've heard i've been in love with you for so long and i've just never axed on it i thought that was just movie because i think i feel like in real life this the love story is never exciting because when two people like each other it just happens they bump into each other with hot coffee coffee yeah they're both it's important that you're both carrying it the liquids have to mix well we hope we've helped you and if you have a question you can tweet us at world of wonder using the hashtag wowhelpme and you can also watch this short little clip of me walking around a chair oh god i have a such a bony ass no pads in drag weird no bra no no panties what about what about um breeder oh hate it i hate that word well i hate it and both i hate it in all contexts because i was going to say the only people i know who breed are gays get breed me breed me mom i don't even like breeding pets no no no no breeders no shelter shelter thank you

Channel: WOWPresents

Views: 5,463,077

Keywords: world of wonder, world of wonder productions, wow report, rupaul's drag race, unh, unhhhh, trixie, mattel, katya, zamo, zamolodchikova, straight, people, hetero, heterosexual

Id: rXSKCE4-BEI

Length: 14min 14sec (854 seconds)

Published: Wed Oct 14 2020

Reddit Comments

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[u/LaQuebecoise]

Trixie at her best is the flower crown hair. So prettyyy

[u/yayreddit02]

I love how their outfits go well together in videos now. They found middle ground while still keeping their opposite energies in tact

[u/boredgerm]

Controversial yet brave - this is the best Tracy Martel has ever looked.

[u/partycitylibra]

I feel like Trixie should go and explore more with yellow heavy looks and maybe still add some pinks here and there or even some cyan!

[u/samanthaa22]

Trixie looks gorgeous wow

[u/Greigebaby]

Katya's pics were fantastic!

I loved how they made a point to say "not YOU straight people, the other ones. You guys are cool".

[u/craftybast]

The episode about gays earlier this season was my new favorite, but this one just usurped it. The editing is a new level of batshit insanity.

[u/serity12682]

I actually really appreciated the distinction between straight and heterosexual.