Stellaris: Pacifism is for Everyone

sponsored by paradox greetings and howdy ho fellow sentient organisms the old masters used to say the way to tranquility is through the door open the door and you'll find what you seek stellaris is rated e 10 plus for kids prepare to leave behind the transgressions of violence of our own corrupted world and embark upon the creation of a new utopian society that values helping and compromise concern truth and equality take my hand whoever you are welcome my first species the tampa bay buccaneers were rough breakish men flawed in course no instead we would create a new species so many options to choose from so in my embarkment i selected the most lovable adorable species just look at how cute it is guided only by friendship and love the pilgrims of peace we would be at all times seeking to come together and compromise our differences that's because we were too weak we began on a wet planet peace rock pacifist xenophile [Music] spiritual xenophiles caring only for the environment and others a democratic people so he would never get anything done atheis what was deemed ultimately as a theocratic republic workers of the galaxy unite when it came time to choose an advisor voice i think that the answer is quite obvious what i picked those who need will receive those who make will make wonders the tranquil serene peaceful quiet lizardmen symbology iconography we chose a heart for love and a circle which has neither beginning nor end together a loving circle of life naturally it provided for the plants which would obviously be our ships that we would ride around in hinkle dinkle swimmington was president of peace namaste so began our journey we recount the story of the lizardmen all civilization begins with science the peaceful lizard man began on their home world peace rock surrounding the star enlightenment get it because it's a source of light and they're also very peaceful so it made sense we start off in our own cluster of stars three of them a trinary system in the midst of a much larger galaxy in the midst of a much larger universe with hyper lane travel going for us we sent out our science ships to the edge of the galaxy shaped like plants all of them but completely harmless with no weapons no armaments only love for many of the worlds in our own star system were not habitable and we need to travel to other star systems to scan and probe the other planets nearby most of them were just but we had quite a lot of stardust to search through there's our empire symbolized by the little heart we're learning as we go every planet as a governor pretty much every single thing in this game has some lizard in charge of it so if there's a ship there's a lizard to be found there a lizard captain in fact or a lizard governor in the case of a state a nabob of sorts taking good care and stewardship of the planets almost immediately we discovered humble alien life dwarf men chunky stubby dwarf men they're to be found in the odd lamonde system the worlds required a lot of scanning but news was abuzz on the lizard men radios and televisions answers were sought controversy was had doodoo was flung so he selected a planet to settle without much else to do he turned inward adopting a tradition of harmony yes harmony that's right life could thrive both on our own home planet and elsewhere in the universe and thrive we would do our only aspiration like that of the tao was the greater good and what could be gooder than great nothing obviously so adlamon was the first sector settled but how does it actually feel to play stellaris ears of intergalactic interloping can only be demonstrated by invoking a series of images all being breamed into your brains wherein we simulated the proliferation of the lizardmen species throughout the nearby star sectors never mind what all the icons mean there are far too many of them and they're too complex for you to ever understand with your smooth brain just know that you're in good hands with the lizardmen so we began to research unfathomable advanced technologies one can only stare into the vast endless void of space getting blue bald year after year by ancient alien artifact after ancient alien corpse never to find any sign of a living intelligence species before society begins to unravel and lose faith in its government collapsing that is until we discovered the ancient violent mining robots sinister orange android spaceships that ate away at minerals and metal in the universe for whom were they mining were we alone in a universe of hatred other species started prank calling us claiming that they were our doom as it turned out the miners were actually friendly and they wouldn't do anything to us but malays still ran amuck news of the evil robots spread homes during controversy society fractured out into factions led by various self-proclaimed navarbs among the lizard men there was the church of pius traditionalists not actually a church but a political party with the objective of keeping everything the same the xeno compassion institute who believed almost exactly the same things as the first party but unfortunately split the vote on our 10-year election cycle one can only surmise how potentially confused voters would be at such a baffling turn of events having seen two political candidates with completely identical looks and nearly identical platforms upon which they ran their campaigns therefore i conjectured that this was a fallacy a conspiracy financed and passed by the third party this made way for the progress promotion network an underground cartel of lizards who had the audacity to disgrace and subvert our society of transcendent communist love with one of freedom and capitalism instead the complexification of lizard man's society began so society expanded and we intermingled with other star systems one time we received a radio transmission from an unknown entity that involved a lot of intimidating howling the howling died down then it rose back up once again louder and still more intimidating than the first raucous transmission while it might seem that the emergence of a common threat would cause the unification of society around a common enemy it also functioned as a distraction that drained from our resources and allowed opportunities for manifold antagonistic cadres to advance their agendas and subvert the de facto order as it turned out the intimidating howling overheard on the intercoms was actually just a feature of this alien race's linguistic peculiarities their bombastic volume signaled their intrepid love of unknown people throughout the cosmos for they too believed in non-violent cooperation toward a common goal of unity it still didn't explain the species that had threatened to be our impending doom later on over the intercom but at the very least we now had rock friends upon whom we could safely rely in a pinch we rushed at once to improve relations with these men literal hunks of minerals by our very adorable nature they already felt protective over us but still we summoned the most courteous of the lizard fira nassetter to facilitate a dialogue advocating even closer rock lizard species interconnectedness everything changed when the fire nation attacked just kidding it wasn't actually the fire nation but rather the nation of double chin people who aspired to ever complexifying technological breakthrough in a species-wide moment of introspection with the galaxy having been mapped we turned inward toward ourselves and established universal basic income for all a highly controversial decision that ultimately led toward more utils of happiness being pooped out onto our entire population can you imagine the intensity of our elation but money doesn't grow on trees as they say with technological breakthroughs occurring at an ever repitifying rate we were flummoxed at the world of opportunity and with the widespread focus on meditation and harmony rather than jobs and infrastructure we were led to an ever harrowing rise in unemployment undoing all of the happiness that we had just created in our society in a tradition of solidarity we negotiated an open door policy with the rock men whereby rocks should be able to enter into lizard lands and lizards into the rains of the rock it was decided that lizards should leave on a great crusade for work and employment having outgrown the humble terror of peace rock we cast our eye to further horizons in the vast mysteries of space toward the venerable rock whom we sought as masters of employment and although we disagreed with their stance on the decree of government it remained cordial this arrived at a crucial moment during lizard man's society at which we made first contact with the cevanti e enterprises ruthless capitalists an entire species of people dedicated to ruthlessly undercutting in pursuit of a greater bottom line unprincipled heathens their faction was the antithesis of everything we esteemed in living a tranquil peaceful life free from suffering how would we show them the way of light and guide them to a womb of serenity with no time to waste we sent out fear odd not setter humblest and most cordial of commissaries to improve relations with them and perhaps guide them to arrive at a higher stance at the understanding of tranquility in which they could partake to join us in our feast of love we were not intimidated by their love of money and tax evasion because we didn't think we could compete with them anymore but because we are better than that we do not purport to be pacifists like the rock but we truly believe that anyone can be our brothers and sisters even if that means giving them all of your land and money until their consciences lead them to the epiphany that money and power are lies land ownership is wrong and bad and the only true reward in this life is personal transformation self-actualization i rerouted all of the resources of civilization toward making cevante enterprises like us as much as possible so that they could know the full power of peace and motion all of the lizard ambassadors simultaneously in the employ of complimenting cevanti enterprises for any possible attractive quality about them that would make them more receptive to our advances of love while i would like to tell you that after one year we convinced cevante enterprises to become peace-loving selfless mammals unfortunately this was the time that the pacifist roc nation decided to be not pacifists threatening to declare war on us if we refused to be vassalized vaseline is no joke having imposed such a harsh self-rule of absolute non-violence we had to agree to the rock's demands becoming a smaller nation within a cluster of stars run by lying con men who posed as peacekeepers it was the only way to fundamentally remain within the harsh confines of our moral boundaries we would simply suggest that the rock should let us go over time along with all of the other nations they might ostensibly peacefully threaten to go to war with after this we joined a galactic senate that opposed piracy which led to yet another moral dilemma should we support the senate's agreements to kill pirates because pirates try to kill people and take their things unfortunately pirates are people too thus by supporting we were directly advocating killing pirates or not we defaulted to agreeing so as not to cause more conflict at this time the bureaucracy was beginning to become overwhelming i decided to give away my entire empire to the rock because they wanted it we may not necessarily have an empire anymore but we have the moral high ground especially fira nassetter so is stellaris for everyone i rate the pacifist experience as stellaris on hard nay impossible mode only for masochists so be it stellaris is for young masochists paradox knows gamers a major thanks to paradox for sponsoring this video you can check out the new aquatics pack to make your own peace-loving fish as always a major thanks to my generous patrons i'm ambiguous amphibian until next time

Channel: ambiguousamphibian

Views: 394,096

Keywords: stellaris, paradox interactive, stellaris gameplay, stellaris pacifism, stellaris pacifism run, let's play stellaris, stellaris acquatics, stellaris 2021, stellaris full run, stellaris game, stellaris gameplay 2021, stellaris ep 1, stellaris episode 1, stellaris part 1, lets play stellaris, ambiguousamphibian, ambiguous amphibian, ambiguousamphibian stellaris, ambiguous amphibian stellaris, ambiguousamphibian paradox

Id: ouaPTS-0mSQ

Length: 12min 58sec (778 seconds)

Published: Mon Nov 22 2021