r/Technicallythetruth | AHAHAH BOOMER

what would stalin think of putin something in russian i don't know [Music] user snakey beach says fan art for mk ah how absolutely adorable is this dude how's it going ladies and gentlemen welcome back to mk i'm your host robin and today we're going to be taking a look at r slash what are we looking at today hold on hold on where's my script give me a minute here i got it i got it what are we looking at r slash technically the truth oh boy this is one of my favorites folks without much further ado let's get into it not my post but i thought it fit here oh you're so funny in cell xl incorrectly assuming something is a date god damn it behind every smile there's teeth oh wow i really don't like that one i know it's true and i shouldn't be afraid of it but i am how are you only 17 i was born in 2002. ah good point have a nice day you know who else liked seeing things from hitler's perspective hitler guess who's 11 today everyone who was born 11 years ago hey hutch why don't you shut up huh do men still open car doors how else is he supposed to get in i can think of a few ways maybe they're not the best ways but you know okay holy crap it's midnight yeah it happens every 24 hours wait a minute it does you son of a mom it's hard to argue with his assessment what what the hell happened here how to speak a foreign language step one go to a foreign country step two speak your mother tongue well that's an expensive way to do it you cannot recite the digits of pie backwards all right listen here you little sh a good percentage of my friends are nazis that percentage is zero that's a good percentage of not friends to have op change your url this is freaking fantastic it's his favorite spot in the whole house poor shark has a loose canine oh i love dental humor in an atom the number of electrons is equal to the number of neutrons the number of electrons or the number of all i see what you did you little sh hey chefs have read it what do you make when you're drunk about 12.50 an hour really that's it man really come on you deserve a lot more than that i'm not like other teenagers i'm 51. well that'll do it man how to fall off a staircase step one step two step three step six step eleven step sixteen floor a pair of scissors can cut your electricity bill by one hundred percent yeah if you're willing to most likely die hi there my name is robin and today i'd like to talk to you about the dangers of poverty if you put alaska on top of the continental united states a lot of people would die man why'd you have to put it there it completely missed michigan how do i unblur not safe for work pictures by turning 18. he's lying i was told the same thing they didn't just magically unblur oh no that's not how it works the first cells were probably lonely yeah lonely why'd you have to put that word on the screen ha got you i'm not lonely i've got zach and he's a great lover good god i need to stop a diss track is just two grown men sitting in separate rooms writing poems about each other they're all secret love songs you don't write poems about anybody else unless you really kind of like them a little bit what moment changed your life forever i was born you were born no see i want proof of that show me that certificate my dude there was a spider on my desk but it's under control now oh seriously what are you planning on doing about this come on don't leave us hanging breaking man hospitalized with six plastic horses up his ass doctors describe his condition as stable man the brony fandom really got out of control there for a couple years did you know that you can hold your breath for the rest of your life visible confusion what do you mean visible confusion that's incredibly true seriously you can test it yourself right now every gamer's reaction upon finding a blood covered room well that's not good i'm pretty sure that's not just exclusive to gamers well we experience it a lot more often than the average person like say a mailman but okay admin please add these two numbers sure therapist listen i really need you to relax me banging fists on the table but how can it be birthday cake flavor if a birthday cake can be any flavor no one literally no one i see oh a bottle of coke and a can of coke are two very different flavors so is a bag of coke okay you know what johan shut up for a second because this woman is onto something okay we need to create a hierarchy of coke flavors starting with mcdonald's right at the top oh and we can put coke and plastic bottles right down at the bottom of the dumpster tier based on a true story means that the real event happened to a much less attractive person oh catherine you got it right i like to play the game of who would play me in a biopic of my life hmm i can't think of anybody that looks that much better than me oh well moving on whatever happened to emos where'd they go if your social group is defined by a suicidal nature don't expect it to last a long time oh man officer the victims were dismembered and sacrificed on an altar made of antlers detective dear god most likely yes excuse me guys someone's mowing the lawn outside hey hey shut up stop it all right i think that worked let's move on name a movie that was ahead of its time a movie about the year 2020 named 2012 that came out in 2009. hey shut up grapes ingredients grapes grapes kanye west becomes president what are you expecting to change the president i wouldn't expect that honestly he's not gonna leave for anybody this boneless avocado avocados don't have bones that's why i said boneless but if avocados don't have bones in the first place why would you even say it because it's boneless duh speaking of boneless i got something for y'all to try next time you go through the taco bell drive-through order a boneless baja blast it's amazing they double the price and tell you never to come back don't forget to wash your hands man i wish it were as simple as doing that although i guess it would be kind of annoying actually now that i think about it can you imagine having to pop your hands off every time you peed meat without feet no then i'm not interested smoothie smoothie maker smoothie maker maker smoothie maker maker maker smoothie maker maker maker maker incorrect the password is incorrect try again wait a minute as what lgtbq is so gay yes florida man tells neighbors he's going to kill them with kindness then tries to kill them with a machete he named kindness well he wasn't lying was he you can't fault the man for that what's a go-to joke you know nobody's heard before i know several jokes in sign language i guarantee nobody's ever heard them oh man i hate you the sentence are you as bored as i am can be said backwards and still makes sense am i as bored as you are jesus getting his nails done this would also imply he's got like dress nails and [ __ ] that he wears out to dances and clubs that are all blinged out in solid gold your fingers have fingertips but your toes don't have toe tips yet you can tiptoe but not tip finger god that one really threw me for a little for a second there yelling at a dog to stop barking doesn't work the dog probably just thinks awesome now we're both barking i don't think the dog really thinks anything me at my second rodeo this ain't my first rodeo shut up carson honey tell me what's wrong both concrete and glass are mostly made of sand which makes skyscrapers just really tall sand castles oh i was gonna make a really bad joke look i'm gonna move on though my boyfriend caught me waiting while i was on my period and he kept screaming i caught you red-handed now now he's got a bun useless fact number six sitcoms are often filmed in front of a live audience because filming in front of a deceased audience is widely frowned upon aha you said frowned upon not illegal actually you know what can we just call it illegal i just realized eric andre would definitely do this bit did you know left-handed people have a higher chance of finishing their exam on time than people with no hands haven't we been over this left-handed people aren't real okay i refuse to believe it it's all propaganda are you an r pirate or a yo-ho-ho pirate i'm an i'm not paying 600 for photoshop pirate yeah same they say that revenge is a dish best served cold they also say revenge is sweet so basically revenge is ice cream okay what facebook page did you guys find this one on reasons he's not texting you number one it's a landline just another overly dramatic post rick and morty fanbase in a nutshell wow i really hate you can someone tell me who made this one please i wanna find them i just wanna talk but i wanna talk mean puppies are sons of a [ __ ] wow so are you if you just won 30 million dollars and your mom's left eye costs 29 million what are you gonna do the hell would i want with her left eye anyway she can keep it robert de niro will be lucky if he makes 7.5 million dollars this year lawyers say i too will be lucky if i earned 7.5 million this year oh no poor super rich movie star shark behind you huh oh oh dear that's not good you've become the very thing you swore to destroy technically we should start calling fire trucks water trucks there are 26 kids at the beach then 37 more kids come how many kids are at the beach now too many for coveted 19. i don't know who this kid is but he deserves at least a little bit of money or something i don't know smarter than most adults come on kid i am faster than the speed of something slower where can i get this top speed runners are literally spending all of their time in games trying not to spend much time in games well yes but actually no to all the people out there suffering from paranoia just remember you're not alone oh no no no you can't do that if you do these for 30 days you'll be unrecognizable sleep for eight plus hours drink two liters minimum of water a day high ph if possible get sun daily no sugar read for 30 minutes a day work out three times a week capture someone and cut their face off and sew it onto your face meditate for 10 minutes daily i'd like to thank you for coming to my ted talk sailor's first time seeing mermaids they had us in the first half not gonna lie found these infinity stones in my sister's drawer i've got the power she currently has the soul stone within herself oh no the opposite of firefly is waterfall stop at first i thought that guy was being abusive but then i realized that the kid is his stepchild take my upboat and leave i'm sorry i can't get over that holy crap super baby dude your results aren't good can i see them probably not oh that dude's face is really scaring me and yes so does mine every time i look at a mirror who wins this fight and why you're literally putting the god of thunder against a guy with a sore throat in a halloween costume yes but a really sick halloween costume also have you seen his car one iteration had a go-cart in it when you look at thor what does he have a brother that's way cooler than he is there i said it human produces vibrations in their throat with the correct tone other humans oh my god remember when this wasn't a singing competition show yeah me neither you get the power to go back and prevent one celebrity's death who would you choose keanu reeves pretty sure he's not dead you're welcome whoa wait a minute this dude saved keanu reeves you know hold up this gets me thinking we think we're in the worst timeline now but there's a timeline where keanu reeves died i'd say we dodged at least a little bit of a bullet a typical female's brain frontal lobe olfactory bulb temporal lobe cerebellum spinal cord occipital lobe falconry training oh that poor guy well he knew what he signed up for or at least i hope he did this is just margarinally funny is that butter no it's stonehenge i can't believe it's not butter wait you mean to tell me if i go to chicago there's a stonehenge made of butter nothing is written in stone i don't know about that one buddy who can jump higher than a mountain everyone can mountains can't jump yeah you're smiling now harold just wait 2020 ain't over yet got a new car chicks love it what do you mean you're being murdered that's illegal people can't do that depends on if you're wearing a badge or not honey tell me what's wrong if you were invisible and closed your eyes would you see through your eyelids oh bike still for sale yes it is what's the lowest you'll go on it two miles per hour anything less than that and you'll tip over i have a confession when my husband gets stuck on a part of a video game for a long period of time i'll look up the solution on my phone and then give him vague suggestions to push him in the right direction i've been doing this for six years if the dude's stuck on a part for six years i don't think you're doing a pretty good job hailing the blind huh jesus what's the catch you'll see you'll all see whoa in 1898 nikola tesla once tricked an entire crowd into believing they could control a toy boat by shouting commands he had in fact invented radio control and was piloting the boat himself technically he wasn't pretending they were controlling it with their verbal commands as long as he did what they said technically correct the best kind of correct life a sexually transmitted terminal disease well as far as terminal diseases go you've got a pretty long span of survival loose gravel yeah i'll freaking say me sees windmill windmill well i just want to say that i'm a huge fan an old krogan man a preserved human body over 2000 years old how did you only find the middle third what happened to this guy well i'm no expert but i think he died god called racist at an airport today tell us what happened i got called racist in an airport yeah but why i was being racist if you weigh 99 pounds and you eat one pound of cheese then you are one percent cheese oh man i know way too many people that are exactly this and by exactly this i mean one percent cheese simon berger makes portraits on glass by shattering it with a hammer it's amazing but how with a hammer will glass coffins become popular remains to be seen oh that would actually make a pretty killer fish tank top three richest people in the world maurice jones was 17 jeff bezos with 115 billion and bill gates with 89 billion technically maurice is closer to being a millionaire than both jeff and bill cannibalism i love my job all you do is boss me around all day what did you say you heard me an apple a day will keep anyone away if you throw it hard enough and with that we have come to the end of another video ladies and gentlemen always remember if you even somewhat enjoyed this one consider dropping a like down below and if you really liked it well then make sure to get yourself subscribed and click that bell icon and until next time i'll be seeing you [Music] you

Channel: EmKay

Views: 1,566,320

Rating: 4.9443865 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, subreddit, best of reddit, r/ top posts, top posts, top posts of all time, reddit top posts, 100% True stories, reddit true stories, top all time, reddit posts, reddit stories, ask reddit, funny reddit, emkay, memes, r/technicallythetruth, r/technicallythetruth emkay, technicallythetruth, technicallythetruth emkay, reddit truth, truth, reddit puns, dad jokes, puns, emkay technicallythetruth

Id: 9VPQRLSprjU

Length: 16min 30sec (990 seconds)

Published: Mon Aug 17 2020