r/Me_irl · click to relate instantly

nobody my ear randomly how's it going everyone and welcome back to easy peasy my name is zach and today we're going to be taking a look at r me irl not one person who went for a job interview in 2015 got the answer right to so where do you see yourself in five years from now i usually get addicted to literally anything that distracts me from the fact i exist yeah yeah alone pros alone cons alone no straw to save the sea animals you might want to look down on your plate me can i go to the bathroom teacher why didn't you go during break school bathrooms during break yeah i remember when guys t-posed on the urinals the birthing welcome to the world when the baby is ready to be born the woman will crouch down while playing at cardi b and the baby will crawl out and turn it off out you come little one this stuff's whack me trying to sleep with one of my legs out of the blanket yep people born between 1995 and 2000 are neither gen z nor millennial we know only pain me alright brain we have two tasks to do one of them is more time sensitive but working on the other will be more fun what should i start on my brain do freaking nothing for 72 hours me understandable have a nice day i hate brushing my teeth next to someone like who's gonna brush the longest who cares about their dental health more why am i competitive right now i don't mess with any burrito without heft if your stuff is convenient and portable take it elsewhere i want a burrito that is burdensome unwieldly when i raise it to my mouth i should feel the weight of the mistake i'm about to make no child should be able to eat this whatever this chair is going through i can relate me at 3am trying to plug in my charger without getting out of the bed me a family-sized bag of cheese puffs at 2am when you're cleaning your room and get distracted by stuff you found this this this one's really uh relatable some dude almost hit me with this car when i was crossing two more steps and homie would have muted me and then he was mad but i'm mad step on it next time me hmm i'm tired i'll have some coffee tiredness level remains the same anxiety level when a deaf person wins an auction i've won but at what cost play time's over no it has only just begun coward last night corona led me down a youtube rabbit hole and i ended up watching a video of an australian cheese maker making parmesan he starts his videos by saying g'day curd nerds and all the comments are italians telling him to go freak himself first year of depression 10th year of depression yeah my husband said he did a double take of me when he first met me but i've also seen him do a double take of a free pile of dirt wait free dirt where was the free dirt do you think it's still there yeah this is you don't know where i can get that free dirt clifford freaking launches a cat why was he so big did they ever give a backstory to that yes he was a little guy but emily elizabeth loved him so much he turned into a big boy your doggo is small what does that say about you you're small what does that say about your parents me me after i do the dishes correct fifty dollars on whatever you want baby here fifty dollars and give me a hundred dollars big brain how shall i get the serotonin and dopamine today a masturbate b buy myself something i don't need c eat processed food d complete one household task e all except d why didn't harry potter drink liquid luck and go kill voldemort because he is a dumbass when your favorite earthling makes it through this season of earth earth is just it's just a big game show for aliens so one button doesn't make you a tailor cook one meal doesn't make you a chef but frick one horse and you're a horse fricker for all of history thanks elon musk this face and this face are irreplaceable emoticons that emojis will never be able to touch literally emoji and emoji if you think emoji has the same power as face you're a blind fool i didn't know how to properly read that out that frick i've seen this but it's uh it's kirby instead do you ever sit back and realize you're not anybody's favorite person you're just kind of there and then you get the sudden urge to distance yourself from everyone and chill alone a guy in class got called on to answer a question and after a short pause he says hang on i'm not dumb i'm just panicking i felt that the guy next to me felt that your mom felt that the world felt that and i felt it too dad's when the flight leaves at two in the afternoon we write it down fox sleeping in a graveyard makes me wonder about reincarnation makes me wonder about soul mates makes me think that dark stone probably soaks up sunlight and that's the warmest place around for a fox to nap if i say good night an hour later you see me online it's not that i lied it's just that i failed when you eat a grape at the grocery store and make i make eye contact with an employee i looked at the image before i could finish the text draw what you think you will look like when you are 100 years old when you're part of the group but not part of the conversation yeah prosecutor mumbling murderer says what defendant what judge guilty me no one hangs out with me someone let's hang out me i don't know one of my favorite games to play is is my headache from dehydration caffeine withdrawal lack of proper nutrition my ponytail stress lack of sleep not wearing my glasses or brain tumor introverts preparing to say here during attendance i have many hidden talents yeah like what i don't know they're hidden fair enough me watches a single youtube tutorial so i can fix my door hinge youtube what's up hinge lover here are the top 1000 videos from the hinger community this week check out this trending hinge content from engaging hinge fluencers girl flirting so do you have any wild fantasies me quitting my job girl no i mean like any risque fantasies me quitting my job without having anything else lined up saw a couple holding hands while jogging and it made me hopeful that one day i will meet someone who will hate them with me never forget you're someone's reason to smile because you are a joke i was playing volleyball in the gym with the kids and this little boy got hit in the head and i was like oh geez you okay dude and he just said yeah i'm real strong watch this and punched himself in the face i said to be gentle with his brain and he told me no really it's okay look and i had to physically block him from slamming his forehead into the brick wall my friend with 20 kills me struggling to stay alive ladies imagine it's 15 years from now you've been planning this dinner for two months your husband asks where his super suit is you ask why he needs to know he says it's for the greater good you know you're the greatest good he'll ever get you realize your evening is in danger when you're using your phone camera as a mirror while shaving balls and suddenly see a bunch of likes floating on the screen uh-oh do you ever just forget to hide your expressions for a minute and then you're like whoa i did not mean to make that face out loud me doesn't understand lyrics of the song also me after reading the lyrics my goodness what obvious lyrics why didn't i hear that if this was an rpg and you found an item with 30 disease resist and you had an empty slot you'd equip that motherfreaker wear your damn masks i can't believe the heat from the sun traveled 149.6 million kilometers just to melt my freaking chocolate bar okay time to sleep the time i called the teacher mom ah a classic what an idiot me has the happiest most enchanting experience of my life my brain nothing me craps myself at olive garden my brain a core memory when you read your old messages and see how you used to talk cringe hello you once gave us tens of thousands of dollars give us more dollars we know there is a global pandemic and you are currently unemployed give us money we aren't even having classes right now money sincerely a college that will email you every day until you die i have never wanted to steal a sign so badly in my life no people me goes to bed my nostrils oh god i fell i feel this one what's wrong nothing when your car is making a really weird noise but your bank account is empty nothing's wrong i can feel it all right all right hey are you trying to go out to eat sometime soon oh my god i've been waiting for you to ask wait i thought someone else sent that sorry la mao it's okay feels bad man i'm born sorry mate wrong path me looking at pets me looking at kids yeah oh the penguin wants to fly well good thing he passed pilot school and now he's flying up there with the duh oh god me potatoes in literally any form yep can we please start a support group for procrastinators tomorrow dad grabs a beer what five-year-old me sees rage spell honey are you having a bad dream no a bad reality do you want to join my religion what's your religion i'm interested me at my second rodeo this ain't my first rodeo thanks carson not freaking worth it this insane schedule and diet this blogger says she follows to keep her mental health in check sounds way worse than just being depressed i'm the type of person who holds onto ticket stubs and photos and presses flowers but never puts them in a scrapbook i just have them scattered everywhere which brilliantly illustrates how i'm a sentimental piece of crap who can't put their life together so i'm gonna share my screen can everybody see it i get in the shower before the water warms up dude what the hell i just came back from the doctors and they told me i'm very sick sick of everyone's bull crap hey sorry i was at the skatepark what's up wow you skate nah that's hard af i ride bikes i can change scientists explaining importance of good sleep me at 3am watching him explain dads after watching the first 10 minutes of a movie i've seen enough i'm sleeping boogers must have a smell we just don't notice because they're there all the time like tinted glasses everything we think we know the scent of is really that minus boogers i wonder if boogers make smells better or worse so have you been on tinder long life is like soccer because my mom signed me up for it and expects me to try my best even though i hate freaking soccer me listening to songs about selling drugs and killing people on my way to a regular 9 to 5 job everyone youtuber talking about the video sponsor 10 seconds i didn't steal your meme i discovered it when your throat is sore and you just sit there and think about the time it wasn't sore and how you took swallowing for granted yeah you ever think you're vibing with someone but actually you were just talking too much pablo escobar took this pick in front of the white house while the whole us government was looking for him but you're scared of texting your crush [ __ ] me at a restaurant waiter here's your cup me oh thank you waiter put some cup me thank you waiter fills cup with water me thank you waiter i'll be back soon with your food me thank you i added something to my to-do list that i'd already done just so i could have the satisfaction of checking something off roses are red tony hawk is a skater ought to reply i'm driving right now i'll get back to you later freak you i'm done being the victim how to bite a mosquito back when you can't find a parking spot so you turn down the volume to see better yeah due to corona we officially have three days of the week one yesterday two today three tomorrow i'm gonna wing it me about something i most definitely should not wing any last word shouldn't it be words plural no i'm on a tight schedule today just one word yeet me trying not to zone out while someone is talking to me what gives people feelings of power money status being the first one to leave the zoom meeting and well ladies and gentlemen that brings us to the end of r me irl thank you all so much for watching if you enjoyed what you saw be sure to hit that subscribe button and the bell so you get notified every time easy peasy uploads and until the next one i'll see you around

Channel: EzPz

Views: 121,900

Rating: 4.9798608 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, reddit top posts, reddit best posts, reddit top posts of all time, top posts of all time, top posts, best posts, posts, reddit posts, reddit funny, r/, subreddit, top all time, reddit true stories, r/me_irl, r/meirl, me irl, me_irl, reddit me irl, r/me_irl ezpz, emkay, ezpz, ez pz

Id: mqj-vtsLahc

Length: 10min 25sec (625 seconds)

Published: Fri Sep 18 2020