r/Maliciouscompliance "You're Fired!" "No... YOU'RE Fired!"

welcome to our slash malicious compliance where loyal employees get sweet revenge against their terrible bosses our next story is from loveless wolf two to one I used to work at a car company about two to three years ago as a telephonist on the night shift doing 12-hour shifts it was pretty good four days working three days off and the pay was decent however most people didn't take their job seriously they would call in sick or just not show up for work at all and especially on nights when there were only four of us if one person didn't show up you felt it I was a star employee I showed up early logged in and started working usually from 6:30 I never took a sick day changed my holidays to fit the company's needs and worked any overtime they needed me to work I was so dedicated to my role that I had worked on multiple occasions eighteen to twenty-four hours as people wouldn't show up for shifts and they needed cover it was my first real job and I believed in the company I used the train system to get to and from work and always planned out my routes as much as I could to avoid being late however on this particular day they were running a reduced service due to breakdowns a lot of the trains have been repaired using less than stellar parts and the wheels kept sticking to the tracks when they hit the brakes causing wearing on the wheels in specific spots so a lot of trains were out of commission on top of that the Train I was on had been stopped due to a signal issue for fifteen to twenty minutes this led to me being late I had shown up about ten minutes late to the start of my shift before I even sat down my manager was giving me grief apparently they were mad because I had stopped other telephone is going home as someone had to work ten extra minutes to cover my shift as two people were ill and couldn't make it now I hate being late I was already pissed off that I was late but my manager giving me trouble as soon as I walked through the door just irritated me even more my reply to him was as follows apologies I was late however how many times have I ever been late I show up thirty minutes with my shift every day I have stayed late to cover days before the train had an issue and it was out of my control I was stuck underground with no signal to call or text to let you know my manager didn't give a flip their reply to me was you start at 7:00 you finish at 7:00 you are in early on your own time those times you have stayed behind you have been paid and no one asked you to okay then was my reply the next day was extremely busy my colleague had left and only one of the morning guys had shown up for a shift to take over as he sat down I began to pack up at 7 a.m. on the dot I left as I usually helped out when this happened everyone was surprised and it asked me where I was going my only reply was I start at 7 I finish at 7 this was my final shift and so I was off for the next few days on my first shift back I got pulled into the office by my manager with HR they asked me why I left a single telephonist on their own I looked at my manager and repeated the exact same words that were said to me my manager informed me I start at 7 I finish at 7 the look on HR face was priceless she was pissed she already had a staff issue to deal with and on top of that one of her most helpful staff members had been mugged off by a manager she told me to go back to my desk and she needed to speak to the manager in question 20 minutes later the manager came back in looking absolutely defeated he never ever said anything to me again about being late I feel like 95% of the reason why I read malicious compliance stories is for that one delicious moment when when opie looks at that douche bag in the eyes and says their exact words back to them oh just makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside our next post is from anslee's I used to be a bartender and manager at a small family-owned restaurant we had this one customer who I'll call D it's short for douchebag anyways he used to be a really nice guy always fun to talk to had interesting stories the works however after about eight months of him being a regular he asked me out I very politely and kindly turned him down and my god you would have thought I threatened his mom with the way he reacted so following that point he turned into a giant douche bag always snapping at me both literally and figuratively complaining about food that he never had an issue with before etc a couple months later we had some changes to our menu and some slight price changes notably his favorite soup elk chili was 75 cents more he stormed in and sat and ordered elk chili I said of course I just want to make sure that you're aware of the change he snapped at me and said how dumb do you think I am I can read okay my dude whatever you say so he gets his soup his meal a few beers and a glass of one of our higher-quality Bourbons I bring him the check and he flips out this is more than it was before you never told me that it would be more this is fraud I'm not paying this fix it okay I can do that however on the check I had also charged him for only happy hour price beers which was significantly less than our regular prices happy hour ended before he even got there I also charged him for a lower quality bourbon by the same company please note the owner was okay with that since he was technically a regular and had spent a lot of money there so I fixed his check for him but I fixed all of it the new check was about 15 dollars more than it was before he was so mad he was lost for words and I took that time to show him how I fixed his check he never came back on nights I was working after that I don't work there anymore I wonder how he's doing well Opie my guess is that he's off making waitresses miserable on other ships because to be honest he sounds like a grade-a d-bag our next post is from bright ninja let me first say I have been a lurker here for quite some time and always enjoy your stories especially when you stick it to stupid bosses this happened some time ago but I think it would fit here these are the actors Bob my boss at the time old can't keep up with technology but had been with a company for a long time and so got to be my boss Hans the hero of the story friend from school who works in the same company but in management but in a different department helped me get this job four years prior Caroline a co-worker who is not the smartest tool in the shed but makes up for it in work ethic Carl a normal coworker who has worked at the company for six years and handles mostly the old client accounts has a family very busy me well me guy in his late 20s a little geeky likes computers this was a small company and our team of three were best described as tech support for our clients but it went a bit further than that I usually helped with setting up databases and also advise clients from time to time if they would benefit from upgrading their plan etc as normal with tech support we got tickets from clients and would work away at them one by one I liked the more challenging problems and usually tried to work hard at them and it just so happened that Caroline liked the more standard problems and enjoyed doing something she already knew over something new every day nothing wrong with that as you might imagine we too made a good team and had this kind of unwritten rules hoot of which tickets win win win win me Caroline company and client until we got a new boss Bob he immediately noticed that I was working far fewer tickets and Caroline I tried to explain to him how not every ticket is the same workload but because he wasn't very tech savvy and didn't understand half the stuff I was doing he didn't understand also around one month later got a huge new client and I spent a week on-site and setting up all the databases and stuff they needed this through down my month average ticket numbers even further duh ahem excuse me back to the story if Bob would have only had half a brain cell he could have figured out why now came something I did not expect from Bob he said we need more help on the team and he was approved to hire a fourth member of our team I was excited we all were we had this new huge client and things were not yet running smoothly and anyway our company was expanding fast so this actually made sense and he specifically asked me to basically do the recruiting process and to work the new guy in he might have figured out that he did not have a clue what we were doing I thought which I was happy to do that same night Hans calls me which is weird because Hans is not a caller he is a texter he basically said you should come over to my house tomorrow I have some beers that need drinking so the next day I get to honza's house and we are just talking about normal stuff we see each other maybe once per month and have a big overlapping friend pool but this time it was just me and him drinking beers no other friends around after some beers he mentioned that he had just updated his resume the day before and that everyone should always have an updated resume on hand do you have an up-to-date resume he asked I felt this was a weird question and had an idea where this was going so I said no but should I is there something you know about that you want to tell me he says well I am just saying that everyone should have a resume ready but I of course couldn't tell you if Bob thinks about letting you go but I also couldn't tell you if Bob is not thinking about letting you go I thanked him very much for the beers and left shortly after that so I know I am getting fired and I had the suspicion that bob has just asked me to hire my own replacement and train him to do my job so he can do this is finally where the sweet malicious compliance comes in I fully comply with hiring a fourth member of the team and also pick one best suitor for what Bob once high ticket numbers so I am thinking not so smart person with a sloppy attitude that does not care if the customers happy after all customer satisfaction was not important to Bob when he talked about my ticket numbers I get right on it many people apply some good ones but I weed those out very quickly resumes with lots of spelling mistakes and little experience in the sector are the ones I invite for an interview the interview stage is trickier because now Bob and someone from HR are sitting in with me but I am still asking most of the questions and giving my opinions on the candidates but because I weeded out the good ones when Bob makes a decision he just chose the best of the worst in my opinion not even the best because one applicant was actually quite good but I asked stupid questions that did not even make sense and when he could not answer them I made him look really bad sorry John I advised one candidate he ends up picking because he will work very fast and will get a lot of tickets done at this point I have another job lined up in four months time but I wanted to get fired by Bob to get some sweet severance pay after two months of training mr. new guy I have just shown him how to do basic tickets which he can do quite well and fast but makes a lot of mistakes with and have let the hard ones slowly build up Karl notices and as he would be the only one after my firing to be able to handle them I let him in on what I was doing as chance would have it he had just gotten an offer from another company and since he also did not like Bob he already decided that he will take the offer but said he could sit on it a few weeks and time it with my firing for maximum destruction then I tell Bob I am done working in the new guy and a week later he tells me he's sadly needs to let me go because my numbers had not gotten better he actually used that against me that I had not been doing that many tickets while I was trained the new guy how dumb can you even be Bob he also wished me a lot of luck finding a new place to work at with my work ethic this had been the day I was waiting for and I just thanked Bob and reminded him of the four months worth of severance I was owed and also the two months worth of vacation I had not taken and carried over it and was now entitled to get paid out as I am hitting out I tell Carl what had just happens and he opens his drawer with a signed two-week notice and walks into Bob's office my girlfriend had vacation time left and we decided to leave for a four-week holiday to New Zealand the next week I proposed to her there as the saying goes spend one fourth of your severance on the engagement ring I started my new job one month after returning from New Zealand and even got a nice pay bump and a good boss I made sure to thank Hans again and he kept me in the loop on how my old department went down the drain very quickly and Bob was let go sometime later when that happened they actually approached me for taking his job and I declined but that would have been the ultimate fu to him about five years later last year I started a company together with Hans doing much of the same thing but in a different City and so far it is going really well our next post is from a sheikh at 21 hey reddit this is my first post and it's my boyfriend's story so a bit of backstory my boyfriend's boss is a bit of a dick but unfortunately he's also his uncle my boyfriend works in IT he handles a lot of complaints regarding servers and general IT stuff for the past three years he has worked overtime for free it's difficult to say no to family he answers his personal phone and has to drive long distances to fix problems clients are having sometimes at 10:00 at night recently we've been trying to save money to make a life together so my boyfriend decided to ask the boss to finally get paid for all the overtime hours he will be working from now on the boss is livid he states that he will pay my boyfriend over time money and shouldn't ask again and that he should be grateful for his job he concludes by saying that there is no such thing as overtime in this business can you see where the malicious compliance comes in yet so my boyfriend now does not answer calls after 5:00 or before aid the boss now has to take all those calls and drive the ridiculous distances himself boyfriend gets called in and is asked why he isn't picking up his phone because the clients are getting really upset at him boyfriends answer I'm sorry but you said there is no such thing as overtime I've never been more proud man why does it feel like every single manager has to go through a mandatory how to be a hypocritical douchebag course before taking the job that was our / malicious compliance and if you have a terrible boss story let me hear it down in the comments

Channel: rSlash

Views: 2,031,745

Rating: 4.8843565 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, funniest posts, funny, comedy, funniest reddit posts, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, maliciouscompliance, malicious, compliance, r/maliciouscompliance

Id: UXQ_IKQAQ3A

Length: 16min 35sec (995 seconds)

Published: Sat May 04 2019