r/Choosingbeggars "DO MY JOB... AND PAY ME FOR IT!"

welcome to our slash choosing beggars were a couple of entitled choosing beggars missed their flight because they can't follow simple instructions our first reddit post is from uri bot and this monstrosity is a resume Meghan bling authorized to work in the US of A yes she actually wrote us of a instead of us a willing to work three to five days a week very dependable must be off by 3:30 every day and the earliest I'm willing to work is 10:00 a.m. cannot work with mayonnaise it grosses me out and that's it that's the whole resume our next read it poses from speedy sneeze hey I'm Emily and I currently go to blank I am struggling a lot in English at the moment and I am trying to find a tutor that can help me with my assignments I am in year 11 and live in blink but I am happy to do tutoring in the library at school I would love to meet you as soon as you can hi Emily thank you for the message smiley face I'm available for tutoring on Monday and Wednesday afternoons meeting at blank or weekends can meet either at your house or the blink library let me know what suits you best I would like to do it at school my friend ash and I both wanted to do it so would you be able to do both of us for the same prize at the same time no problem I can't do two for the price of one because it will mean extra work for me but I can give you a discount if you'd both like to do it at the same time my normal rate is 35 bucks per hour per person but I'm happy to bring it down to 25 each does this sound okay I will talk to my dad and get back to you okay smiley face then her dad at Tech so P hi this is Emily's dad she contacted you about tutoring would you be able to do both girls for $35 they're both in high school still and can pay that much regards John hi John my normal tutoring rate is $35 per hour per person I told Emily I'd be happy to tutor her and her friend for $25 each I took into account that although I will be tutoring two people at once which means more work for me this also means I won't be able to give each one my individual attention therefore I think $25 each is a fair price no $35 35 I did off for 25 dollars but if you'd like to raise my ray that's fine by me please Emily is struggling with English and needs your help she is only in high school and can't afford that much regards yes and I'm a university student and have to pay for my own expenses sorry but I've already offered to lower my reign she needs a tutor she will fail because of you dumb jerk oh when dad says dumb jerk it's not really clear if he's referring to his daughter or Opie I'd like to think that he's referring to his daughter she sucks at English that dumb jerk our next reddit post is from trash wizard NYC eight foot trampoline free free come get it works great no cuts or tears where was it made who has been on it very particular on what my kids touch it's free a turd our next reddit post is from madam mayor is love oh man the pool thing caused my aunt and uncle so much stress some people think that a pool at a neighbor's house equals neighborhood pool and would just send their kids over wearing a swimsuit no asking first just hey Here I am my aunt ended up telling everyone that parents could come and bring their kids swimming as long as they stayed with them the entire time but no uninvited drop offs are walk-ups man a few people got so pissed off they truly felt entitled to have her lifeguard and sunscreen and feed their kids this comment from jbjb a 1 2 3 4 down in the comments we have a pool and a trampoline in our backyard one day one of our neighbors kids literally just walked in our front door into our kitchen uninvited found my mom and yelled I heard you guys got a pool ha ha ha alright today today I learned never install a pool our trampoline in your backyard our next reddit post is from our zonton why aren't you replying on whatsapp oh sorry I hardly go in there what's up can you watch over Lily my aunt told me she'll pay 30 bucks if I watch over Lily tonight I said okay but now I have plans with Ryan and Airy I'll give you half so like 15 for you 15 for me if you watch over Lily WTF shouldn't I get the whole 30 if I'm watching over her no I really need the money just do it for me this once please no I'm actually going out with dad today so I can't maybe ask someone else there is no one else to ask OMG please I really need this I can't okay I'm sorry you should have asked me earlier that's not my fault WTF I a thing hey you you're such a dumb jerk of a sister Evie you don't bother talking to me either this reminds me of another reddit post that I read on some separate it and I can't remember where it was but basically this IT dude had gotten hired from some big company to write code but instead of doing his job he just sent all of his tasks to some like coding company in India and paid them like 25 percent of his salary to do the for him and then he submitted their work to his company and meanwhile he just spent all of his time at the office browsing reddit eventually he got caught and got fired but here's the kicker all of the code that he submitted was spotless which kind of boggles the mind if he was doing a good job even in a weird way why fire him our next reddit post is from Hedwig is BAE dating me equals $1,100 a month rent is $300 my nails $100 my hair $100 taking me shopping at least $300 utilities $200 spending money $100 if you date me my bills are a package deal either you support me or gtfo heart so you know all those tropical animals like poison dart frogs that are bright colors which are a warning sign to other animals meaning don't touch this thing or you will regret it I feel like posts like this are the dating equivalent of a neon orange poison dart frog our next reddit post is from little pony hi can you take me today let me know asap otherwise I'll have to go elsewhere hello can you please answer me you're my first choice but I will go elsewhere if need be I guess you don't want my business as a longtime client I am extremely disappointed I will not return as a client due to this behavior on your part and just to be clear all these messages occurred over the course of an hour and a half hi I'm sorry I was sleeping I'm off today but if you'd like I can see you tomorrow can you take me today no I'm off today I have tomorrow Thursday or Saturday available I need it for today can you make an exception for me no I'm sorry I have plans with my kids today I can refer you to someone else I don't want to go elsewhere I can bring my daughters she's 16 she can watch them for the hour if you need I really can't today I can come right now or anytime maybe when you get back it's important that I get my lashes done today huh my day with my kids is very important as well and I won't know when I'm coming back and don't want to cut the day short you're making me very uncomfortable continuously asking me when I keep saying no jerk worst customers service what's the point of being a loyal client if it won't pay off such a jerk our necks right it poses from Fonzie Bob a while back this one some background oh I'd once driven a friend who didn't wear their seat belt and copped a $300 fine for it onto the story a family friend's son needed a lift to the airport early one morning for a long-planned trip I lived about 10 miles from their place and the 30 mile trip I was taking to work the opposite direction took me right past the airport so it was a bit of extra time out of the morning 15 miles to the west to pick up the sons then 45 miles east instead of 30 East but they begged and both phoned me so I said I was good to give them a lift I turned up in the morning loaded up their gear and the sons both in the car and said goodbye to their parents and we took off drove a few miles up the freeway and my seatbelt alert starts pinging son one in the front seat had taken off his seatbelt I asked him to put it on and he goes nah I don't do seatbelts so I pulled over looked at the other son in the back seat which didn't have alarms and sure enough he'd taken off his belt too then the arguing started I was blunt as I could be that I'm not risking my license my money so they could get a free lift I didn't care one way or another about roughly as follows paraphrase because it was years ago but they were both in on it I'm not moving the car unless the belts are on I've been fined once before not doing it again I told you I don't do seatbelts dad's okay with it I'm not and you son number two yours on - not moving until they're on do you have any idea how dangerous they are in an accident I blink son one then puts his behind him and clicks it in no the belt goes around you doesn't count it'll turn off the alarm go you'll see we need to get going we can when you put the belt on I don't give a flip about the alarm I care that it's a 600 buck find if you two don't have belts on the other son says come on we'll be late your flights not for another hour and a half belts on Sun one didn't calls his dad complains we've stopped and dad asked why son one explains then his dad tells him to just put the belt on Sun one says ok but didn't notice I'd heard his dad's side of the conversation - and he said his dad says I need to get a move on not until the belts are on this goes back and forth to the point I will be late to work if I don't get going son one is all fine then turn around I'll get dad to drive belts on men know I've told you already then we're not moving I get out my phone and browse idly showing I'm not moving until their seatbelts go on son one phones his dad again his dad sounds really pissed but agrees to pick them up both sons get out take their bags one slams the door in boot and I Drive off choosy beggars Left Behind I get to work then get a phone call that son too left his main luggage in my car and they wanted dropped off at the airport urgently they're flying out soon and they need it now I tell them to get a taxi and I'll meet them out back at my work they decide to argue it's my responsibility to get them to luggage and again argue the points half an hour later one turns up in a taxi to get the others luggage I should note here I really don't know these guys well at all I know one's name for sure and I think I know the other but I might have him mixed up with a cousin from the same suburb later that afternoon I get a phone call from their dad that I've wasted his son's tickets they weren't able to fly out couldn't rebook quickly and they'll miss half their vacation time now and it was all my fault for stopping for so long I tried to explain as clearly as possible that I wasn't going to risk another huge fine and piss off my employer just for the inconvenience of a couple of ingrateful idiots but ended up just hanging up on him I'm so friends with her mother who was the original friend of the family but things are a bit strained between me and her husband and Sons I wonder how well the no seat belt strategy would have worked once they got on the plane sir we need you to put on your SIBO before the plane takes off and if you don't we'll have to remove you from the flight our next reddit post is from fw toxic hello I'm interested in your newest thumbnail how much does it cost hi it's 5 euros can you send it to me for free without the watermark no sorry I spent a good 1 hour and 30 minutes to make it plus the watermark is for people not to steal it and claim it as their own well I can't pay now I could pay later and could you change the color from blue to red one no sorry you have to pay now two that would cost a little bit more Wow you selfish freak only doing this because of money shame just give to me for free nobody would want to buy this our next reddit post is from maple syrup for 20 so my great-uncle was a super cool dude air force worked on the fire service and on the rails took a 1929 car and redid it when he was 80 basically every little kid's dream because of his stories and stuff anyways my great-uncle had began to have health issues in his older years this made him less active and therefore at home more which made him grouchy his wife and kids began openly discussing in front of him how they couldn't wait for him to die how they wanted him gone so they could sell off his stuff for money how they knew they had a big inheritance waiting for them and they wanted it ASAP well I am sitting there in the other room next to uncle hearing all of this and he turns to me and just goes that's what they think minute those cretins started wishing me dead I rewrote my will and none of them are in it they have money I am giving my wife enough to live off for one year and the rest is for my funeral and two Charities of my choice well uncle died later that year at 98 years old it was a booze storm because everyone was expecting to get hundreds of thousand each and there wasn't one of them who got a dollar my great aunt got something like $5,000 the kids didn't get anything he bought himself the most expensive casket the funeral home sold and a mausoleum for just him I loved that man man with several hundreds of thousands of dollars I think he could have built himself a little miniature pyramid like the Emperor's of Egypt used to that was our slash using beggars and if you liked my video please subscribe to my channel and check out my merch store with the link down in the description

Channel: rSlash

Views: 1,728,304

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, funniest posts, funny, comedy, funniest reddit posts, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, choosingbeggars, beggar, r/choosingbeggars, choosing beggar, choosing

Id: bYAjbGhp2Xs

Length: 17min 27sec (1047 seconds)

Published: Fri Jun 21 2019