Disney Movies That Haven't Aged Well

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The pure horror on his face when the little kid kissed the woman was hilarious

👍︎︎ 12 👤︎︎ u/Cowsgomoo414 📅︎︎ Jun 24 2020 🗫︎ replies

Some strange racist bullshit

👍︎︎ 2 👤︎︎ u/FranzFafka 📅︎︎ Jun 25 2020 🗫︎ replies
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- Hey, guy, welcome back to Build a Bear Workshop. A few weeks ago, I made a video about "High School Musical" and "Camp Rock," and I realized while scrolling through Disney+, how many movies I had suppressed from my memory. It's so bizarre seeing all these random DCOMs from like 17 years ago when suddenly having an influx of nostalgia for something I hadn't thought about in years. When I was a kid, all I did was watch Disney channel and Nickelodeon. That was it. There was no YouTube back then. We didn't have books, and my parents were very strict about what they would let me watch on TV. I wasn't even allowed to watch Cartoon Network until I was 13. Don't ask me why, 'cause I don't know. I guess they were trying to shelter me from the harsh reality of the real world, but it didn't work. I still know all the curse words now, like crud and A-S-S. I mean, I don't say that one, but sometimes my friends do, but, anyway, the thing about Disney Channel, at least back then, I don't know if this is still true, is that they didn't play commercials. They would have commercial breaks, of course, but they would use that time only to advertise other Disney programs. So even if there was a movie that I only saw once, I would see the trailer for it like 50 times while watching other Disney shows. So all of the lines from the trailer would end up ingrained in my brain, and, to this day, there's nothing I can do to get rid of them. - Wow, he's amazing. - [Narrator] Get ready to rock. - [Both] That's the song. - [Narrator] And what they don't know is that who country is watching them. - [Both] This is better than wrestling. - [Both] No, he's really cooking. - The other thing I realized over the past couple of weeks while Amanda and I had been taking turns pointing at the TV and saying, "I remember that" is holy shit, some of these movies aged like milk. And it's not just them saying things in 2002 that would be problematic by today's standards. Although there are a couple of funny examples of that, but for me, it's also just because of some of the actors in these movies. A perfect example of what I'm talking about is "Stuck in the Suburbs." So this was a Disney Channel movie about a pop star staying in a small town who loses his cell phone. So his assistant has to spend the entire movie trying to get it back to him. (guy yells) I know it sounds dumb when I put it like that, but don't worry. That's not the only reason why. The thing is I know Taran Killam from three things and only three things, "Saturday Night Live," "The Amanda Show," and this movie. Everything else I've ever seen him in has been satirical, dozens of sketches and commercial parodies, so it is so funny to try and watch this movie, which now looks like an 82 minute SNL sketch, and try to take him seriously. Like of all the actors to play this misunderstood teenage heartthrob pop star, it's the guy from "Moody's Point." It's so bizarre to watch, especially now. I would genuinely love to ask him about this movie, if he was excited for it, if it was just like, "Well, I guess I should do it, ' "cause I'm not getting a lot of other acting work," or maybe he thought like this is the direction his career would go in, he would start taking more acting roles like this, even though he didn't really want to. It would actually be kind of ironic if he did, because that's the arc of his character in the movie. He keeps doing all these things, because he thinks he's supposed to, but deep down, all he really wants to do is sing sappy boy band music. (Taran sings) (calm acoustic music) ♪ Oh ♪ The best scene in the movie, hands down, is this little montage here. (phones ring) ♪ Ah yeah ♪ ♪ And you ♪ (girl screams) (teenagers scream) - [Girl] Jordan, I love you! ♪ I've been so lost ♪ ♪ Baby now I'm found ♪ ♪ Since you've been around ♪ - (laughs) That's so wonderful, the horrible editing, and then the abrupt cut. I counted, there's only eight different shots that they're using, but they keep laying them over each other to make it seem like there's hundreds. Even in just the three by three grid, they were already reusing a shot. I always forget with most Disney Channel movies how minuscule the budgets probably were. You sort of have this expectation of like a feature film, but it's shot on a TV budget. So looking back, some of them are just unwatchable now. Do you guys remember "Tiger Cruise?" It's actually a pretty wild idea for a movie. It takes place on 9/11. It's all these children of Navy sailors who were like, "No, the Navy's stupid. "Why are we on a boat?" And then 9/11 happens, and they're like, "Wow. "Actually the military is an important "and vital establishment. "We should go to war." It's a pretty heavy concept for a Disney movie, lots of very serious moments. So it's too bad that they shot like 80% of it in front of a green screen, because, oh my God, it looks like shit. The crazy thing about this to me is that the entire movie has one setting, the boat. All they needed was one boat, but, I guess, why worry about that when you've got a perfectly good one right here. Another movie I was excited to check out again was "Now You See It." I don't know if you guys saw this. I feel like most people didn't, but I remember loving this movie as a child. I couldn't remember what it was about, though, so I decided to check out a couple of scenes last night, and (sighs) maybe it's not as good as I thought. - [Allyson] Danny, the ring! It's the last piece of the puzzle. You gotta use it against Max. (dramatic music) - [Danny] Now it's my move, Max. (yells) - Maybe the ending is good. - How'd I get here? - Magic. (both laugh) - You know, I still don't know how you do that. - Ah, a good magician never reveals his secrets of his tricks. (both laugh) (quirky music) - [Allyson] Show off. (upbeat music) ♪ Do you believe in magic ♪ - Okay, we don't have to talk about that. - Magic. - But I know. I know why you guys are here. You don't wanna hear about outdated special effects. You trying to see that offensive shit. We trying to cancel Disney. And I don't know about all that, but there is a pretty long list of hard to defend decisions they've made throughout the years. "Peter Pan" has a racist ass song. "Dumbo" got some racist ass crows. And "The Beauty and the Beast" is a movie about a girl who falls in love with the animal who kidnapped her. And I know, those movies are old as hell. Things were different back in the 50s and the 90s, but there's another movie that came out when I was 10 that did not age very well. "Freaky Friday" came out in 2003, and it's a remake of a remake of a film adaptation of a book. This movie was huge at the time. It was right during the peak of Lindsay Lohan's career, Chad Michael Murray's career, and it did a lot to re-establish Jamie Lee Curtis as not only a comedic actress, but also an eventual yogurt sales woman. For the most part, this is a pretty solid movie. It's got some funny lines. It's probably Lindsay Lohan's best acting performance. There is just one thing I forgot about, though, and it's how they switched bodies. In the original "Freaky Friday," they just like made a wish out loud, and then the special effects took it from there. - [Both] I wish I could switch places with her for just one day. (dramatic music) - In the 2018 version, they did this. (door slams) - I hate you. (dramatic music) - I hate your attitude. - Great comeback, Mom. ♪ I don't need to live a large. ♪ ♪ I just ♪ - Side note, ♪ I had no idea this movie was a musical. ♪ So imagine my surprise when they burst into song. (characters sing) - But in the 2003 version, the switch happens while they're arguing at a Chinese restaurant and the owner overhears them, gives them some magic fortune cookies, and then there's an earthquake, and they wake up in each other's bodies. - What was she mumbling about in Chinese? - She did something, some strange Asian voodoo. - A prominent movie reviewer at the time called this some strange racist bullshit. And still the movie went on to make over $160 million. I guess it just kind of serves as an unfortunate reminder of how prominent Asian stereotypes were in American movies, even not that long ago, how normal it was to see these exaggerated characters using super strong accents that the actors playing them didn't even have. And, in this case, the writers really only used them as a plot device to justify the body switch. It's like, "Well, we don't really know that much "about Chinese people, so they can probably do magic." Luckily, we've come a long way since then in terms of representation in movies, or at least we were coming a long way until "Little Italy" came out in 2018 and set us back like three decades. Hey, speaking of three decades ago, let's take a trip back to the year, 1994, and talk about a very weird movie called "Blank Check." It's not so much that this movie didn't age well. It's more that it probably never should have been made in the first place. This movie takes place in a world where money is the only thing that can make you happy. - What do you want for your birthday? - (sighs) Money. - [Fred] So you gonna have fun today? - [Preston] How can I, Dad? I don't have any money. - And if you're poor, all the other kids are gonna make fun of you for that. Like when Preston goes to an amusement park with his friends, his dad only gives him a measly six bucks, so he can't afford to go on any of the cool rides with them. He has to go on the lame ass merry-go-round while they point and laugh at him. And things continue to suck for Preston until an evil villain runs over his bike, and then gives him a blank check. - Give this to your dad, he'll know what to do with it. - But he doesn't give it to his dad. Instead, he just writes a million dollars, and then takes it to the bank and cashes it on the spot. Now, the thing that Preston hates more than anything in the world is the fact that he lives at home with his family. He wants his own house. So using some sort of computer program, he calls a real estate agent who's in the middle of selling this mansion to someone for $150,000. He starts outbidding the guy and eventually buys it for 300 grand. Now, if you're curious, this is a real house that really exists. On realtor.com. it is estimated to have a value of $4.1 million. He got it for 300 grand, but you can't forget about inflation. It's been about 25 years, so that makes sense. But the funniest part of this transaction, is not just that he got it for $300,000. It's the fact that he's just using some shady computer voice over the phone, and the owners of the house are like, "Yep, we'll take it." - [Both] We'll take it. - "I don't need to meet this person. "I don't need to know their name. "We will take the offer from the mysterious robot voice." Then he realizes he can't use his real name to buy the house, so he has to come up with an alter ego. What's it gonna be? (suspenseful music) - Bingo. - Macintosh, 'cause he saw the word. - [Voiceover] Macintosh. But again, I know, this all sounds pretty normal so far for a kid's movie, but here's where it gets fucked up. One of the things on Preston's wishlist, besides the house that he just bought for a fraction of market value, is a girlfriend. Sounds like a pretty easy task for someone with a million dollars cash. Just buy a nice gift for a cute girl your age, or plan a nice romantic dinner for a cute girl your age, or (ethereal music) he could just fall in love with an adult woman, and then that will be the love interest for the entire movie. Yeah, that seems like a good decision. - I'll see you next time. - I hope it's not in a million years. - So then they go on the date. (Preston gargles) - [Shay] Oh wow. - What's the shortest guy you ever dated? - I'm not really sure. - The youngest? - And they're just really hitting it off. - Mr. Macintosh is very interested in you. - He is, oh wow. - So, let's take things outside. Maybe run through a fountain together. (upbeat music) Stop. Stop it. - That was really fun. I had such a good time. - Me too. - Goodnight, Preston. - Goodnight, Shay. - Oh, thank God. For a moment there, I thought they were gonna kiss. It's a good thing they didn't, because that would be weird. Meanwhile, the evil villain who gave him one million dollars wants to get the one million dollars back, because he didn't actually want to give him one million dollars. He thought it would just be like 50 bucks. So when he sees the kid out riding his bike, a chase ensues. - Your butt is mine, kid! - Interesting word choice. - [Quigley] Your butt is mine! - You might be wondering how an eight year old kid can get away with living at another mansion all the time, and suddenly having a bunch of expensive things. Like what do his parents think is going on? Well, here's what he tells them. He tells them that he got a job. They think that he's working for some mysterious man named Mr. Macintosh, who, in reality, we know is actually just Preston. So they're just like, "Okay, cool. "Glad you're spending all day "at the house of a man we've never met "while he gives you a bunch of expensive things." No red flags have been raised. These are the world's best parents. - I'm having a party. - Anyway, now it's time for that party that Preston wants to throw for the sole purpose of having something to invite the woman to, but would you look at this? He's out of money. He had one million dollars. He spent all of it, and it has been three days. Anyway, the FBI shows up and arrests all the bad guys. And now that he doesn't have any money left, Preston pretty much just returns to a normal life. Okay, so I guess it wasn't that weird of a movie. I was probably exaggerating. Wait, what are you doing? - So that means our date was just for your job. - Well, it started out like that. - What's going on there? - Hey, you know, I wouldn't have traded that night for anything. - So, when can I see you again, Shay? - Why don't you give me a call in, say, about 10 years? - Five. - Seven. - Six. - 50. - Okay. It's a date. (romantic music) - She couldn't just kiss him on the cheek, or give him a high five? Why did they put this on Disney+? Why wouldn't they try to suppress this forever, lock it away in a vault and never speak of it again? You know what, I give "Blank Check" five stars. One movie, I think, that actually did age well is "Smart House." That shit came out in 1999. And like Nakey Jakey said in his video about DCOMs, it's like watching an episode of "Black Mirror." I feel like that movie is the reason that I'm so against buying like an Alexa or a Google Home. If your house can think for itself and make decisions and has a robot arm, it's going to turn on you. I don't make the rules, that's just what happens. In fact, can you turn the video up for a second? Just a little bit? Perfect. Alexa, self-destruct. Sorry, I had to do it. Trust me, guys, you don't need a device in your own home that's listening to you at all times just so we can turn around and sell that information. Hold on. Oh, I just got an ad for anal beads. What are the odds? I was just texting my wife about that. Anyway, what was I saying? - [Quigley] Your butt is mine, kid! - Well, it's been a long day so far, guys. What do you say we cleanse our palate with a good old fashioned brand deal. Hi. I'll give you two hours to try and guess what I'm about to advertise. (chill jazz music) - Aw man, my shirt gave it away. - Look, guy, I get it. You already know all about how a virtual private network masks your IP address and encrypts your online data, making it so internet ne'er-do-wells and even your internet service provider can't collect your private information and then turn around and sell it. So I won't bore you by telling you all about that again. I promise I won't say any of that. I know that you're just upset, because you live in Canada and you can't watch the John Oliver clip I posted on Twitter, because, for some reason, it's blocked in your country. I'm just saying, if you had ExpressVPN, all you'd have to do is click this button, and then change your location to like Texas or something. I don't care. And just like that, even Canadians can watch a British person talk about America. ExpressVPN has server locations in 94 different countries, opening up your internet to literally an entire world full of possibilities. I use this feature all the time to watch shows like "Friends" on Netflix, or back when basketball was on, I would use it to change my location, so I could watch local games that were blacked out. It's a long story. I don't want to talk about it. I miss sports. Please come back to me. ExpressVPN has consistently faster speeds than other VPNs out there. They also have 24/7 customer support and a 30 day money back guarantee in case anything goes wrong. To find out how you can get three months free of ExpressVPN, click the link in the description. That's expressvpn.com/drew. Take back your internet privacy today, or tomorrow if you're busy, but you should do it soon. (chuckles) That guy's awesome. Anyway, thanks for watching today's video, guy. I'm sorry if I brought back some memories that you didn't think you still had. As I promised in my last video, I'm gonna be donating money for every video that I upload this month. This week, it is The Okra Project. You can read more about them in the description. They're a collective that helps black trans people. If you'd like to subscribe to my YouTube channel, please don't. I'm so tired of people doing that. It's really getting on my nerves. And if you try to do it, I will be contacting the FBI, sorry. Anyway, thanks again for watching. I'll see you guys next week for another video where I swap bodies with my dad, and things get pretty crazy. All right, bye.
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Channel: Drew Gooden
Views: 4,211,033
Rating: 4.9659319 out of 5
Keywords: drew gooden, comedy, commentary, reaction, vine, drew gooden vine, road work ahead guy, parody, rant, cringe
Id: o1TwluWTnIo
Channel Id: undefined
Length: 16min 49sec (1009 seconds)
Published: Wed Jun 24 2020
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