- Hey guy, welcome back
to, I think it's Thursday, but does it really matter if I'm wrong. So it's been a while since I've talked about a
bad movie on this channel. The reason being I haven't watched any. After my Christmas movie marathon. I realized the best bad movies are the ones that I find on accident. So I stopped seeking them out. I decided if I was gonna discover one it was gonna happen organically. So a couple months ago, when I started listening to Lauren Lapkus and Nicole Byer's podcasts
newcomers. Where they watched all the Star Wars Movies
for the first time, and then talked about how weird it is to watch all the Star Wars
Movies for the first time. It made me wanna watch
all the Star Wars Movies for like the 10th time. So we did. And it got Amanda and I wondering, what other movies Hayden
Christensen has been in. Because unlike his two
much more famous co-stars, he kind of disappeared
after Revenge Of The Sith. I mean, yeah, he did burn
to a crisp at the end, but hey throw him in
a RomCom or something. Then randomly one day
when Amanda's co-worker recommended that we watch Little Italy. A movie starring Anakin Skywalker, Emma Roberts and also this is the poster. We knew we had to stop what we were doing and watch it immediately. Warning, before we start, there is so much pizza in this movie that it is almost impossible to watch without wanting to order one yourself. As you'll see later on, we did. Something to keep in mind, maybe just go ahead and order one now, get it over with. I'll wait. (soft music) Sorry, I know it sounds like
I'm like sponsored by pizza. I'm not, it's just, my brain is very dumb. And when I see food on
television, I have to have it. So I'm just giving you a fair warning in case that happens to you as well. But with that in mind, grab a slice, pack your bags because we are taking
a trip to Little Italy. (Upbeat music)
(airplane engine) Hold on. Sorry, not that one. (upbeat music) That's right. This movie is not filmed in
Italy or even in New York. It was filmed in Toronto. Now despite having the script
and overall feeling of a made for TV Hallmark movie,
Little Italy actually had an international theatrical release. Where it earned a
whopping 17% of the money that it costs to make the movie. In fact, just one month
after it was released it was already only being shown
in seven theaters worldwide. Yikes! Hey let's play a game. Imagine if you will, a person. Now I want you to pick
one of the characteristics of this person, their
ethnicity, a personality trait whatever it is. I want you to imagine that
there is a slider you can adjust that dictates how much of
that thing this person is. Now, go ahead and turn that slider all the way up to a hundred. And you've just created every
character in this movie. This doesn't just go for
all the Italian characters who are of course the most
Italian someone can be. - Every time I make the
sauce I say three Hail Mary. - But the only black
character in this movie is you guessed it. A sassy lady. - Don't change your plans for no man. - And if I told you that this character who was played by an actor who in real life talks like this. - I play a Lead guitar and
sing a couple of songs as well. - Would you be surprised to learn that that's not how he sounds in the movie? - Girls are sicker than India. - I can't believe this
came out two years ago. Speaking of accents, our beloved Hayden Christensen
made the bold choice of giving his character an Italian accent. Despite the fact that
they don't live in Italy, they live in Canada. - Romeo and Julia died. That's not oregano. You handle my ass. - His co-star, Emma Roberts
doesn't have an accent. So why does he? When they show scenes of him as a kid, he doesn't have an accent. - I like her. - But then 10 years in Toronto later and he suddenly he sounds like
if spaghetti could talk. But what's so beautiful about this is not that the accent itself but rather his total inability to maintain it throughout
the duration of the movie. It just completely
disappears at some points and then comes back on strong
when you least expect it. - How are you doing? What are you thinking? You handle my ass? - It's not just the characters
though, who are cliche. So many of the lines seem
to have been plagiarized from an IMDb list of popular movie quotes. - You can take the girl
out of Little Italy, but you can't take Little
Italy out of the girl. - Cook these foods of nunya. - Tanya was nunya. - It's none of your business. - They also have this scene, where they just blatantly
rip off Gordon Ramsey memes. - You are a what? - Moron sandwich. - What are you? - An idiot sandwich. - Oil is a garnish. You've used so much. The US
army will invade the plate. - Is that allowed? Can you do that? And if all of that wasn't bad enough. This is also the horniest movie I have ever watched in my life. - Sausage and peppers two large. - Hey! That was my nickname in the army. - There's a scene where Hayden's character gets frisked by a cop and it
just goes on way too long. - You amazing, Man gun did you hiding anything else? What have we got here? A six pack. No, I'm sorry. That's eight. Packing heat here mister? My God! Were you breastfed? There anything in your pockets, that might be sharp or
hard or pokey in any way? - What the fuck is this? There's a scene where they
really focus in on her taking her shoes off. - Why you so dress up, on
your parents' backyard? - Good point. - Which at first just
seems like a random choice but then you realize it's to
set up this joke later on. - And the toes breath, in
a big tongue. Very nice. - And now it makes sense. - That's good. - But let's rewind back to
the beginning of the movie. So you can get an idea of the actual plot. So these two kids who aren't cousins even though it very much
seems like they are, have been in love forever but then Nikki grows up and
goes off to culinary school. While Hayden stays home to make pizza. Her teacher sends her back
to Canada to get a work Visa and also create a new menu for her restaurant that she's opening. Something we only see her work on for like five seconds of the entire movie. She pretty much just gets drunk and eats pizza the whole time
and things work out for her. It's a really solid lesson to learn, which is that you don't need to work hard to achieve your goals. You just need to fall in love. - In the net. There it is. Alright guys. I gotta take off. - Alright he got one in goal.
- Got one in the hoop. Bye.
- I'm done for today. - Hey there? You know we deliver. - I bet he does. - That's joke number two. - Yeah. So that begins the whole movie of every female character wanting to fuck Hayden Christensen at all time. - Hey seriously! - Hey seriously ! - Excuse me, will my pizza belong? - No! your pizza will be round. - Taking a walk. - I'll join, Sal's - That guy already bought a pizza here and he's gonna go buy
another pizza next door. - Give me gossip. Royal freaking dirt. - What do you want to know? - You are seeing an investment banker. So? - He had a sizeable portfolio but not a clue how to manage it. - They haven't seen
each other in five years and they are like... - It's like so, how's the dick been? Whats dick like out there?
Is it same British dick. Pretty good dick. (laughing) - What is he doing here? - He works here. You didn't know that? - Why would she know that?
She's been gone for five years. - So you guys gonna introduce
me to your friend here? - You guys gonna introduce
me to your friend here? - Shall we take this outside? - Come on you can't be serious. - I don't know he looks
pretty serious to me. - I don't know if he's pretty serious. (laughing) - I don't know he looks
pretty serious to me. - Yeah, he looks pretty serious. - And its raining. - What's the matter? You
afraid you might get wet? - My God! - Afraid you might get? - Wet.
- Wet. - I am. - Shit. My God. Did I
just say that out loud? - To the field. (screaming) - Nicky versus Leo the rematch
It's gonna get messy people. - All go outside. (laughing) - She blocks the shot, Leo does the shot. - It's like downpour, torrential rain and everyone from the
bar just left the bar. - Yeah, let's go outside to watch two drunk people play soccer. - That's so many shots. She's had like 10 shots. - Are you Okay? You sure? - Yeah. (soft music) - Okay, Ladies. (buoyant music) - Go Jogi, go Jai ho,slumdog. - Why did he say that? That's not even a topical
reference. That was 10 years ago. - Take me on your magic
carpet ride, Aladdin. - She just called him Aladdin. - Yeah. - Let me explain what's happening. So the two families who used to own one
joint pizza shop together are now rivals. They had a big fight. So they're always messing with each other. Yesterday, Vince put curry
powder in Sal's sauce. - Jessie why is today's
sauce smell like cat puke? - Curry powder. - But they had the
Indian characters say it so it's not racist. - Yeah. - So today's Sal's spikes,
Vince's pizza with weed. And now everyone is high. And doing the things that
you do in your high, which is you know, go badshit insane
and dance around the room. A more accurate scene where
they've all been drugged with marijuana. Is they're just
like sitting really quietly, slowly eating their pizza. - Yeah. (upbeat music) - I like to move it, move it. Is not the anthem of high people. - You wanna have dinner tomorrow night? - Yeah sure. Best
friend's gotta eat, right? - That's true. Best friends do gotta eat. - Okay. - Okay. - Sorry. (laughing) - Sorry.
- Sorry. All right. (laughing) - You're always eating pizza. And he has a pizza oven in his apartment. - This is really good. - Those are just the appetizers. - These are really good pizzas. These are really good pizzas.
That's just the appetizer. Wait till I make the pizza. - Let's stare into...
- Let's stare at the pizza together. The most romantic thing we could do. - Those are just the appetizers? - So while Leo and Nicki
are courting each other there's another subplot going on Where their grandparents are
slowly falling in love as well. And as you can see, this part of the movie is
pretty riveting to watch - I will marry you. (applause) - In every scene where the
main characters do anything. Everybody else is watching them and glued too and clapping. - Yes. - The main characters. Like they know their NPCs in the story. - Okay. This is the one and
only time we see her actually doing the thing she's supposed to be doing because that's why she went back home. - And then quickly gets interrupted again by Hayden Christensen. - And pizza. (laughing) - pizza for the lady. - Just when you thought there might be a scene without pizza. - There's pizza.
- There's pizza. (soft music) - I had pizza for lunch.
And now for dinner. I love you. - Okay I wouldn't wanna
hate Hayden Christensen in the covering me some pizza. - If Hayden Christensen
brought me some pizza there'd be two different sausages. I'd be sucking on. (laughing) it Wouldn't be a RomCom. If there wasn't a scene where they tried on
funny hats and glasses. - They get wet a lot. - Wet. - But if you don't get wet how are you gonna take your clothes? - Yeah. This is the second time now. - They've had to strip because
they're clothes were wet. Both times voluntarily. First, they went out in the fucking rain. Then he just did donuts because the fire
extinguisher was going off. Not the fire extinguisher
the fire hydrant. The fire extinguishers had gone off. Let's go run around in it. Good news everyone. They finally did it. They finally shag. - Your hair looks like
you've been shagging? - No! - FaceTime ending, decline accept. I accepted the FaceTime is ending. - Have you ever thought
about leaving here ma? - Leaving? No! No it never occured to me. - Leaving Little Italy.
- Never. - Leaving home. I could never leave this small
section in downtown Toronto. - Don't you wanna go to Big Italy? - Yeah. They have this
like Italian heritage deeply rooted in their family
and they have no desire to leave Toronto and visit
Italy. This is weird. Pretty pivotal scene in the movie here. The inevitable conflict that sets up the third act redemption act. It's a RomCom. They're all the same. - Yeah. Like you let me win last night. - This scene ends with
probably the best line in the whole movie. - Know there's a reason why
they call it Little Italy because nothing ever changes here. - What? (laughing) What does that even mean? Do you like this movie too? Now, if for whatever reason you thought this entire movie wasn't
leading up a to a pizza competition. I'm sorry to break it to you, but you were just wrong.
That's exactly what happens. - So the chef wants to make pizza? - Just when there couldn't be
enough gratuitous sexuality in the movie, they combined
the pizza competition with a bikini contest, they're just simultaneously
happening on the same stage. But Hey, that's Little Italy for you. (soft music) Why's the entire town so invested in the lives of these seven people? - [MC] Leo Campoli from
Vince's 'The Best' pizza! (applause) (soft music) - Just has her bag ready to go. - Got her bag packed ready to go. Taxi waiting she gets in the taxi. - Nicky! - She's gone Leo. To the airport. - She's Probably halfway to Britain. - She's already on the plane. - It's been 12 Second. And if for some reason
you thought this movie wasn't going to end with a
chase scene at an airport. Shame on you! For not seeing that coming. (buoyant music) - Nicky? - He just runs up... (laughing) He runs up... - He runs up to the first
woman he sees he's like - Nicky?
- Nicky? You're just someone else.
- Some girl. (buzzing) ♪Never change ♪ In the writing room they go, "okay. How can we buy her more time?" - Yeah. How do we stall? - Let's have her go through the... - TSA line taking off one
piece of jewelry at a time. It must be your watch. - Yeah, okay! - Sorry, forgot about my anklet. - Nicky! ♪Love you the same ♪ Don't go. - I have the high ground Nicky. - The only thing I want, is you. - She does a Jedi back
flip back to the top. - I have the high ground Nicky. - Then she burns in lava
and becomes Darth Vader - Okay and everyone has now just stopped. - Again. - TSA screening has just stopped. They don't have a flight to catch. - The main characters are
talking. Everybody looking, listen - All this time you never said anything. And now that I'm about to get on a plane. You finally find the word. - Love isn't words. - It's one word. (laughing) - It's about time. (laughing) - What's it going to girl? - Yay! (applause) So if their grandparents got married? - Then now they are technically cousins. They're not blood cousins,
but it's still like... - It's weird to... - It's a little bit too all in the family. - But how would you explain to people? Yeah, we have the same grandparents. - But it's not like that. We didn't start kissing
until after we were cousins. As kids, when we were unrelated,
we didn't do anything. But then the moment we became cousins that's when we started having sex. - Of nunya. - Nunya business.
- Nunya business. - I liked it. I'd watch it again. - We did. - We watched it twice now. - The second time was... - I still actually kind of like it. - If want to watch a very
horny movie full of stereotypes and you're hungry for pizza.
This is the movie for you. - You handle my ass. - So at this point you've probably worked
up quite an appetite. And although I can't offer you pizza I can offer the next best thing. Hot dog. Hi, I'm Poorly Lit. And I'm founder and CEO of
www.pictureofhotdog.com. The world's quietest website. Last month, I asked you
guys for suggestions of what toppings to put on
the now World Famous Wiener and you had some excellent
ideas, keep them coming. But for this month's edition, I found it hard not to agree with Sheila. "Hot dog needs sprinkles." So I had my chef cook up exactly that. And boy does it look tasty? You can find this delicious treat alongside a handful of others only at www.pictureofhotdog.com. A website I proudly made using today's sponsors Squarespace. Back before I outsourced my merchant to a company that does it professionally. I took on the task of handling all myself using Squarespace to make my website. Once a week, I would spend an
entire day packing up orders, putting shipping labels on them, driving down to the post office and handing them all off to a
very confused postal worker. It was a lot of work, but I was able to pull it off efficiently. Thanks to Squarespace's
built in e-commerce tools. If you're looking to run your own website I can't recommend them enough. I was able to make a
really intuitive storefront that made it super easy for people to use. I had access to all of the
analytics I could possibly need. And they also work hand in hand with a service called ship station. Which organized all my shipping
labels and packing slips, so I could print them all at once. It saved me a bunch of time, probably would have taken
me three times as long if I didn't have access to that. So whether you're looking to
make your own online store or you're an artist and
you need a place to show off your portfolio, or you just like to put stuff on hotdogs, Squarespace can help you turn your dream into a reality. To get started with a 14 day free trial head to www.squarespace.com/true. And when you're ready to launch a website use promo code Dru for 10%
off your first purchase. Thank you so much to Squarespace for sponsoring today's video and supporting my channel in the process. You guys do end up making a website, be sure to send that to me on Twitter. Because I'd much rather shout
out some independent creators as examples of what a cool
website can look like rather than just using like the
templates on their homepage. Also, you may have noticed
there's a fundraiser icon next to the video. Due to everything
that's going on right now. I wanted to try to use my
platform for more than just whatever it is I normally do. Direct relief is a great organization that is currently working with manufacturers to provide
personal protective equipment for healthcare workers. Which is one of the biggest
problems we're facing right now. There's just simply not
enough to go around. I know there's like a
million charities out there and it's kind of overwhelming
when they're all asking for help at the same time. But if you were looking to
donate to one, just know that every dollar that is
spent on this fundraiser I will be matching myself
up to the goal of $10,000. So your donation will
essentially be doubled. I'm excited to see what
good can come from this. I've never done one of these on YouTube, but I'm planning to do a few more of these throughout the
next couple of months. It'll probably be a different
charity every time, just because there's a lot of
different aspects of this crisis and different charities are
focusing on different things. So I don't want to just put
all of my attention on one. But for now it's direct relief. You can read more about them
at the link in the description. There's of course, absolutely
no pressure at all to donate. I'm just putting this out there for people who maybe were looking to donate and didn't know which
organization to donate to. That's kind of how I've
been for the past month or so that being said,
thank you for watching. Be safe, wash your hands. And if you do get pizza,
please mail me a slice. Thanks, bye.
Biggest upside of this quarantine is Amanda being in more vids tbh
Love their dynamic, they really seem to be on the same wavelength like... all the time
Petition for Drew and Amanda to do a full commentary on a movie like Trinn Lovell does where we just see her face and watch the movie along with her.