Comedians vs DUMB HECKLERS

huh oh my vape pen you want to hit my vape pen oh sorry [ __ ] i'm trying not to get herpes my back i've been playing cat and mouse with herpes for 30 years now but every night i go to the club i'll be like not tonight herpes no disrespect i'm not saying you have herpes i'm just saying one out of five people do so let's just uh let's just all be careful around this [ __ ] and make sure that we leave with the lips we came with what that's what i was going to say really my first thing i was going to say fun do you want to do the show mate what's your name you've got a lot of confidence mate i didn't even say a word you're right you know what i'm gonna just yell out something straight away get on your mate have one of these what didn't i already destroy your life mate i know i don't know this round two what's up man he's giving up it's alright i would have done two have you ever had an entire room of 170 people going for real you know did you guys know that shamu killed someone you did know that yes oh you did it well thanks for sharing a genie just came all right um so i'd like to read these poems for you guys we'll uh we'll read these poems and then uh we'll think for a little bit get a little contemplative then we'll go back to the silly stuff i promise here we go perfect in the lights exactly what i wanted thank you so much amazing amazing is that real or was that not real that was amazing i could sum up this city in one sound [Applause] that's lip balm i've never got that out on stage before up to 15 as well taking no [ __ ] chance don't we just keep getting me pockets it's like [ __ ] magic 15 peach [Music] now we're in west palm beach or palm beach west palm beach and uh you said pressure what'd you say you're not sure thank you for saying that out loud i really feel like that got us somewhere who the [ __ ] answers the question without knowing in a room of 600 people you could just be quiet right like that's what most people would do right hey is it raining outside i don't know i just want you to know that i don't know either we're on the same page we should get to the bottom of this [Music] who was it it was you oh that's what's up [Music] hmm [Music] canada all i want to get is a 22 that's it 22 caliber protect the house no big deal that's it exactly really sir i love that ah come on no you think i wasn't setting them up how many times did i say 22 caliber i said the first time i heard the groans you just keep you just can't he's sending that fishing line there's always one guy that takes the [ __ ] date in my hand and i started shooting at you what would you do other than run screaming out of the building sticking babies in front of you like mark machine in the dead side right they're gonna say that's just a twenty-two relax all right unload it right off me it's a [ __ ] gun all right it's not the biggest one but that's all you [ __ ] need you're in a house you know you're in a [ __ ] thai rice with your glass balcony that's all you [ __ ] need get the [ __ ] out of here that's all you need to do perfect [ __ ] gun all these morons telling you get these giant guns in your [ __ ] house they're idiots they're [ __ ] morons who are like me overheard some [ __ ] all right get a shotgun a second you go that's it the guy just goes oh [ __ ] dude you heard that one i was trying to go home with this girl the other night and uh and she did the line she hit me with she's like i'd invite you over but my place was kind of a mess and i was like yeah i can work past that that's not a huge obstacle we're not trying to get laid we can we can work faster like i'm gonna walk into our apartment and be like absolutely not for this joke i don't care about phil i usually draw the line at women who went through my shows [Music] why would i give a [ __ ] about mess if a woman is if a woman is willing to have sex with me i'm just going to assume my whole [ __ ] life is in shambles cockroaches i guess that's [ __ ] gross i don't know this is a weird conversation i was just trying to tell a joke about [Applause] this okay no cockroaches i'll give you that

Channel: LaughPlanet

Views: 2,206,725

Keywords: comedian vs dumb hecklers, comedians vs hecklers, heckler, dumb hecklers, strange hecklers, stand up comedy, comedy, bill burr vs heckler, dave chappelle hecklers, bo burnham, andrew schulz vs heckler, sam morril heckler, funny hecklers, funny, laugh planet

Id: 2u1iH_KPzoc

Length: 9min 12sec (552 seconds)

Published: Thu May 06 2021