Bobby Lee & Khalyla - H3 Podcast #214

Video Statistics and Information

Video
Captions Word Cloud
Reddit Comments

anyone got the uncensored part?

πŸ‘οΈŽ︎ 35 πŸ‘€οΈŽ︎ u/Darylwilllive4evr πŸ“…οΈŽ︎ Sep 10 2020 πŸ—«︎ replies

They seem like the most authentically themselves when they're on h3h3.

πŸ‘οΈŽ︎ 18 πŸ‘€οΈŽ︎ u/krazyboi πŸ“…οΈŽ︎ Sep 11 2020 πŸ—«︎ replies
πŸ‘οΈŽ︎ 13 πŸ‘€οΈŽ︎ u/useyourownillusion πŸ“…οΈŽ︎ Sep 11 2020 πŸ—«︎ replies

Khalyla looks like she could play a version of Sacagawea

πŸ‘οΈŽ︎ 24 πŸ‘€οΈŽ︎ u/canti- πŸ“…οΈŽ︎ Sep 10 2020 πŸ—«︎ replies

Best podcast guests out there <3

πŸ‘οΈŽ︎ 23 πŸ‘€οΈŽ︎ u/DizEthan414 πŸ“…οΈŽ︎ Sep 10 2020 πŸ—«︎ replies

This episode is hilarious. A lot like when H3 were on TB. I love bobby’s solo appearance on H3 too.

But when him and khalyla were on, I kinda think Ethan went into pushy dad mode (with nice intentions) when he kept asking them to have kids and it made it a bit weird. Had hilarious moments though but this is differently back to form.

I like that George and Gilbert are in the background too. Really cozy vibe

πŸ‘οΈŽ︎ 25 πŸ‘€οΈŽ︎ u/mediciii πŸ“…οΈŽ︎ Sep 10 2020 πŸ—«︎ replies

beat me to it. I'm sure this is going to be a wonderful conversation

πŸ‘οΈŽ︎ 16 πŸ‘€οΈŽ︎ u/stackered πŸ“…οΈŽ︎ Sep 10 2020 πŸ—«︎ replies

Really enjoyed the episodes. I like these better than some of the higher profile guest. It feels chummier and more telling.

πŸ‘οΈŽ︎ 13 πŸ‘€οΈŽ︎ u/Peanuts_reVenge πŸ“…οΈŽ︎ Sep 10 2020 πŸ—«︎ replies

Ethan was right about mother Teresa being a c unt. She denied suffering people pain meds saying its "god will". Then when she was suffering she begged for the needle like a junkie. This msg was removed by the mods for some reason.

πŸ‘οΈŽ︎ 4 πŸ‘€οΈŽ︎ u/Neuro420 πŸ“…οΈŽ︎ Sep 11 2020 πŸ—«︎ replies
Captions
welcome everybody to the h3 podcast joined of course by why of course i mean we have a different guest every week but it's bobby lee and kalila this episode is sponsored by draftkings and me undies how are you guys doing in these strange odd times well you know living with her is like living with miss hannigan from annie um she's um very strict um i haven't been to a grocery store i haven't been to a i've been to two gas stations um i haven't been to a rave and i haven't been to a strip club and i haven't been i haven't seen my mom wait hang on one second that's crazy talk he's a bad son he's a bad son i have repeatedly asked him check on your mother make sure that someone sends her a grocery she's 80 years old you're a bad son i text her every day he texts her every day i text her every day how long does the text interaction last is it like hey how are you and then you peace out or literally i i i i can i i can read you some interactions that we have we've had we have it yeah how long is this conversation well the conversations are like this so um she'll she'll always send me like some sort of are these memes those are um um they're just quotes they're quotes so she'll say have a great like a quote have a great week ahead wishing you all a great week filled with smiles happiness and all the good things in life and then i'll just go i love you mom please stay safe out there don't get covered but they're all like that i would just one line i love you mommy love you mom where is she getting oh good night and she does meet yeah and so kalila you think that's inadequate communicating with his mother um i do i'm more of uh um i don't like pretty talk i like what are you doing with your hands to help her navigate through a pandy so my thing is like [Music] the panty so like with my parents because like i have a fear of them going even to the grocery stores i make sure that food is always delivered to their door and they have produce and things like that so they don't they don't feel the pressure to have to like step out weekly because they're old so bobby does kalila like her parents more than you like your your mom ethan ethan don't be like that don't be that don't buy don't don't swallow the pill don't be like that okay all right you're supposed to be on my side now check it out bro i'm always on your side thank you my mother even before the pandy okay wore a bts mask right correct what's bts it's behind the scenes as a k-pop group yeah yeah so she's obsessed with the k-pop groove right and they wear a mask on stage she wore the mask you know before even the pandemic yeah so i know that she's wearing a bts mask is she wearing a mask oh because it's for fashion yeah so when she goes outside she wears like this it looks like a darth vader like summer mask yeah before the pandemic started she already had a whole collection of masks is it like an asian thing because i know like asians like the mask is that is it just like no that's that's so that's so like you to even ask that um well hold on yeah are you saying yes yes yes yeah well it's not she my mother is asian but she's also very eccentric so yes i think she um it is kind of an asian thing yeah you're right does she wear can i ask you another question what does she wear gloves when she drives yeah like michael jackson what is that what do you mean what do you mean i've just noticed that asian no but asian women wear gloves when they drive and i just find i swear to god i mean how would i know that she wears a glove otherwise how would i know that yeah she just um i don't know why she wears i don't ask these questions because then you go down a rabbit hole right you don't understand it's called a fashion you know i mean she'll go into a whole thing so it's like i just kind of when i look at her because she wears bandanas on her head and funny glasses she wears like a lot of scarves it's the ajumma style the power clashing like i feel like the power clashing was made made wonderful by older korean women well i made her cry in hawaii well before the pandemic started their last interaction was a giant fight and meltdown in hawaii because he was really upset that about her obsession with bts so let me let me explain okay wait wait what okay go ahead let me explain okay so there was a time where my mother and i our phones were linked because she she was on my i because she wanted my itunes right so we had she my email was attached to her phone oh yeah so all her photos would come down to my photos right and okay i'm not kidding you she would screenshot two to three thousand photos of bts a day wait hold on are we really talking about bts the korean pop band so obsessed really yeah when we gave her a bts stuff for christmas last year she cried wait are you guys with me no i swear i swear to [ __ ] well i have a photo of her wearing a bts mask wait so she i can't believe what i'm hearing that your mom is a bts fan okay well because i joked about it before and you act like like no wow okay when i met said bts that's what i meant oh wow okay yeah yeah yeah this is real wow this is [ __ ] real this is [ __ ] real wow okay okay so we're in hawaii right and and she would stay in the hotel room and we would be driving around and i was with my brother and kalila and i would look at my phone and i'd spend maybe an hour a day erasing oh no you did 3 000 he has screenshots and i i just snapped and i was like this is going to stop it's unhealthy right so we we raced back to the hotel and my mother sitting on the bed screenshotting bts and i think she's playing with her old coochie oh dude i know that's what i think i mean that's the only thing why else right why why is she saving all these street shots she's going okay okay and she's playing with her coochie watching like looking at bts like in my mind didn't you say like 80 80 yeah your 80 year old mom is a bts fan how does that happen yeah i don't know so what does she do with all these screenshots i don't well here she makes this is where i had to play mediator because it was a whole big family meltdown between them apparently she was crying by the time bobby had actually confronted her she was crying and she was like it sees because i like to make these collages because i am i'm a super fan she's army and she's army for sure what does that mean bts army she is yeah so she makes collages and then she just saves them on her phone it's like digital scrapbooking for her to pass the time because she believes what i'm hearing how is she 80 and she's so into all this stuff that like she's making she's actually a lot more internet savvy than most older people like she's able to navigate i don't give a [ __ ] i don't give a [ __ ] stop doing it stop [ __ ] doing it okay crazy stop [ __ ] doing it so so you guys that's what your take was to your mom just stop so i i walked in i go daddy this is gotta stop your [ __ ] mind what the [ __ ] is a bts listen to [ __ ] you know beethoven like all people are supposed to listen to like you know i mean like you know beatles and she goes and then she [ __ ] starts crying starts crumbling she takes the blanket of the [ __ ] hotel bed and she covers her body and she goes uh leave me alone i like what i like and then she was really sad i think she said this she started crying with under the blanket she was like my joy is my joy yeah my joy is my joy my joy is my joy and go [ __ ] your joy you said that yeah yeah yeah and then kalala was taking a shower and my and then we just sat there and my mom's like underneath a blanket crying i don't know what the [ __ ] to do right because i kind of want to do like a you know like a wwf just wrestling and slam her body what the [ __ ] yeah yeah yeah like that's how enraged i was but then i i'm like no i should wait until klyla comes out kalela comes out and she hugs her and then she made it all better but i i swear to [ __ ] god man well it's because him and him and his brother at this point it's like she was in a corner crying and they just wouldn't relent and then now i realized the root of it all um i think that because the bts boys represent a complete opposite of everything bobby is and who he thinks he is he feels really offended that maybe his mom has this like finally has like a perfect sun's on the screen wait opposite in what way kalila well like you know they're i mean handsome this guy right here young and pretty yeah yeah yeah that's what it is that's exactly what it is does she like how you dress or does she hate it like you made the mullet yeah i mean yeah [ __ ] dude what are you doing that's still not bts bro check it out bro dude first of all this is pandy me okay this is not this is not civilization me civilization me i i you know i put on the the moisturizer and i put the fancy cologne on and i wear nice clothes but in when no one's going to see me who gives a [ __ ] i'm seeing you i mean everybody's seeing i know this is the first time i'm doing this okay you know you have a show so yeah i think that's what it is my mom right um is like all the other koreans right that likes that's they like polished good looking you know shiny shiny objects and it's like my brother and i are like little pieces of cat [ __ ] you know i mean we're like little pieces of cat [ __ ] next to these shiny objects and i guess i get [ __ ] offended that you know that i'm not that in the moment wow you've definitely that's what it is yeah i think i would be upset too that's so right right thank you but do you think bobby's uh maybe bobby's on to something like that he has some right to be like why does she obsess with these perfect little korean dolls and and but like she doesn't want to like why does she need her son she wants to [ __ ] them yeah sure and and who doesn't yeah no me too i would probably [ __ ] them yeah but she does she does often say though when you ask her like why she likes them and she says i feel like they are my sons oh that's [ __ ] up so that ain't right look don't clap don't clap well i feel like we hit it we just you know what something's [ __ ] up you don't clap yeah right you don't stand up give him a standing ovation you know what i mean so yeah that's why wow she says she feels like they're her son yeah she feels a warmth towards them and a pride as if they were her own son yeah man people love bts it's an incredible phenomenon how how how uh the whole phenomenon it's just it's unbelievable you know it doesn't do it for me i don't know thank you i don't say anything bad about them i'm not gonna say anything bad because you know about them yes they're able to infiltrate the army is really uh a kind of uh a force on their own and they're almost like a political force really they are they're a governing body they're part of nato i actually i love what they've done politically so i i love bts no i love bts really i think they're super talented maybe one song wait give me one song ethan i i don't think bobby understands quite what the army does at all or what their influence is on even like twitter and what are you able to do just be careful my favorite song is dynamite it just came out two weeks ago no i like all of them it's hard to choose yeah yeah i like first of all i know what the military is all right i know what an army is all right because i've seen platoon i've seen saving so i get what it is it's an army of people that support you know i mean bts and number two i have these dreams about bts about you know do you ever see the human centipede yes yes yeah so i have a dream of they're all surgically you know i mean oh you know oh they're all [ __ ] right right and then they're just kidding through each other so bobby do you ever see yourself maybe do you have fantasies about joining bts no because i i feel like here's the deal i feel like i've tried i've tried to carve out my own thing you know i've worked hard that's another thing i think i don't think my mom respects me mm-hmm yeah that's the thing so i've you know you know i you know i do game shows i do podcasts yeah i do sketch comedy i do stand up absolutely and she doesn't respect it you know you know it's like you know hey you kind of have a face i just want to know do you think his mom respects his profession yeah but it's a typical you know asian mom relationship where it's like they they won't give it up to their own kids like god forbid you show any type of like give your kids any real praise but but she does respect you and love you and is so grateful for your existence there she goes no i'll give you an example so i was in a movie i was in a movie no i was in a movie like 16 years ago it was called kicking it old school and it was a break dancing movie with jamie kennedy okay and it was it was premiere night there was one theater in arizona where my parents live where it um you know premiered yeah you know so my parents went to eight o'clock show right and my dad called me and he goes there's nobody here and i go what do you mean and he goes we in the theater nobody here and i go oh i'm trying to make me feel bad yeah so i go oh watch it anyway he goes if nobody here we don't watch and they left oh my god they left even your own they never said yeah they never saw it oh my god kind of sad though because after the whole bts meltdown in hawaii he was trying to still kind of prove his worth to his mom and so and bts was coming to pasadena before the pandemic happened bts was supposed to be in pasadena this summer performing and to try to um wield his power he said ma i can get you backstage to bts like this and then her eyes lit up and she was like really kidding me and then but i know what it was just a flex it was you know yeah could you really i called yeah but you know so um that's why i haven't really talked to her since hawaii i text her every day but i have to say that movie theater anecdote is pretty sad that must've hurt yeah it it hurt but you know they're old-school koreans and you know i think i know deep down inside that they're you know proud of me i guess maybe you know my dad died but like my mom still you know i don't think i was just on a game show i don't think she saw any of them but um i mean it's fine it's fine it reminds me of my dad too i i get the old school vibe it's just like it's just so different like you yeah you just have to accept it yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah it's the same for me it's the same for me i always growing up i always heard my mom praise just about everybody except for my sister and i think that um it's even up until today it's like you only really get the true feeling on a birthday card right once a year they spill their guts on a birthday party and you cry you have this moment of like crying because oh my god your mom actually loves you and values you but for the rest of the year it's a whole lot of pretty epic birthday cards is it like a hallmark card that she writes a ton on or is it like a whole yeah see my mom writes a lot my mom buys a hallmark card and then she just writes happy birthday and then it's all about what's written on the hallmark card that's why i don't understand that [ __ ] i go why does anyone care about cards because it's like i throw them out just sign it yeah but well someone else wrote that right yes yeah you don't mean that you don't mean it yeah yeah they probably never even read it they just probably went to the [ __ ] you know you know pharmacy or where they got it from yeah they go this looks colorful and then you wrote happy birthday yeah but ethan does your mom give sprinkle you with love all throughout the year i don't know i think i mean yeah my parents love me but but like they are eli you better answer that you can be honest about it i think they do it's different for me because they're different from my family he thinks my parents are [ __ ] crazy no don't say that [Applause] [Laughter] it's just so different but um i i mean they do yeah they love it they're just weird they do show it it's just um for me it's different there's a thing they listen they're listening to this and they live nearby us and they like come over like once a week ah so that's nice so that's nice but like ela's embarrassed to say anything it's no it's just that my mom is very um affectionate and loving and my dad was like the opposite so i grew up with like two polar like my dad was like never said i love you never never anything just like that and then my mom is like the opposite so and then when it comes to hispanics it's just totally different so i i don't know how to put it in words you know i don't want to say anything offensive to them does ethan say i love you to you yes a lot very effective yeah yeah do you say it to kala yeah i'd say or every day i love you a lot yeah yeah yeah yeah how are you guys i don't you guys like with covet and everything you guys healthy you guys feel strong i think we feel strong today i think it was a little bit rocky in the beginning i think with a lot of people trying to match up how you're going to approach a pandemic because i thought i had one plan and he had another plan and we just weren't really lining up with with how we wanted to go about like safety and stuff like that wow yeah i'm glad that you guys are on the safe side because i see so many people who are not and it's just crazy to me it's a crazy talk we all got to do our part because you know what the [ __ ] did i agree i think that those who can do their part and who have the idea yeah exactly yeah yeah and and the ones because there's so many others who really can't right right and it's like well let's kind of try and offset the ones who can't by you know i mean i get people that want need that need to survive and then they need to pay bills and they have to go to work i get all that right but i don't get like going to a beach party no you know i mean i don't get that you know so it's for me you know i um you know a lot of people they don't scoff but they think that you know you know 200 dead 200 000 deaths you know in the grand scheme of things isn't isn't a lot all right but for me it's like i think about each and every death how that affects you know other people's lives you know so it's just like if to me it is a lot it's a [ __ ] lot who's going to say that she meets a lot dude you know uh kovid passed cancer as the number two killer of people in america now yeah kills more people than cancer dude yeah if you imagine 200 000 people in an arena just imagine that they're all gone right i mean that's heavy that's heavy [ __ ] yeah yeah yeah yeah hey bobby um did you know that you have a 2.86 on wiki feet but yeah and then i back up what the [ __ ] yeah and i go why would you even [ __ ] ask me that no no let me say something okay all right i'm not a foot model number one i'm not a foot model point eight six two point was it two point eight six two point eight six bobby i'm trying to get your percentage divided by five so okay so it's just over 50 it's like you know 50. that's a fail babe okay yeah it's embarrassing i it's okay let me say something all right number one i'm not a foot model number two i don't give a [ __ ] about my feet never have never will right because those are the the it's like wheels right right gilbert so like your wheels right can be dirty because they're the ones that are on the ground right holding up the weight of the [ __ ] car right yeah yeah yeah in your car you go off dirt riding right they go you know whatever they might do with the car okay but the you know if you look at someone's car it's pretty the wheels are pretty dirty yeah right and they don't wash them every day no wash your tires of your car yeah but do you no not every day you haven't do you not address the nail i do wash my feet every day though why must you you're gonna get them dirty again well like take a shower every day right oh i do okay you're right i do that right and also eat ethan can i say something okay and and and i i have i have foot fungi yes i know and i talk about that all the time on people's podcasts everyone knows that foot fungi you think that's hurting your score that's hurting my score yeah it's the rumor bill because who's taking photos of my feet if you go there you can see the photos there's like 10 of them like there's a lot or you randomly show your foot oh here you go can you guys see this yeah yeah let me see so click around oh okay can i i can't yeah yeah so like these people who who submit to wikifeet they are so sharp they don't miss a thing dude if you show toe they got it but i gotta tell you from looking at it they don't look bad yeah i don't know why they're being so harsh thank i have cute little yellow feet from the sandals bro you're wearing sandals on a talk show [Laughter] that's hilarious i didn't know wikipedia existed when i did that yeah see now you gotta live smarter now i know yeah yeah these guys will get you every time okay so yeah so my feet don't look that bad but you know for me that's what i got in high school those grades yeah it's just par part i got all c's in high school it doesn't make me feel bad yeah it's consistent yeah um what is your what is yours on wikipedia it's ridiculous well i'm glad you asked here go ahead and pull it up whoever did that i don't know who did that oh yeah go ahead 5.46 out of 5. i have a beyond perfect score wow pretty ridiculous look at that beyonce all right so all right okay so can i ask i honestly i'm being self-conscious about it and i want to ask everyone listening okay what does one do to get a higher score that's dude i feel like i feel like it's too late no go no i this is you want to know how i did that because i just want to go because every time i have a guest on i bring it up and i tell all my fans go give me five stars on wiki feet and then when i there's people i don't like like there's this guy keemstar it was a piece of [ __ ] on youtube i said go give him one star on wiki feed pull up keemstar's wiki feed ian this is how i get back at people go give bobby lee a five star on wiki feed bobby deserves a five star you guys yeah they'll make it home listening you want to see what happens to my enemies keemstar yeah one out of five stars you see what i'm saying yeah yeah yeah so so everyone everyone listening to me i'm gonna do a plea and i'm gonna get emotional okay so and you go ahead right now okay so dear fans and dear people listening okay you may not know me okay but i'm desperado i'm in deep panic mode please you know my i think i've been judged because based on the photos right i don't think the score equates to that right so please i beg of you give me a higher score and and it'll make it'll make my pandemic um far more um i'll feel much much better yeah yeah yeah so please please help me please help me it does feel good convincing yeah yeah it's convincing thank you yeah they'll do it so sorry to interrupt a break do you remember that bobby you got a break no that was a sound bite you remember the last time you were on you're selling a really emotional story and then dan interrupted you because that that's like a meme on our show now and so we use that sound bite all the time of dan interrupting you play it again so sorry to interrupt we gotta go to break we play that sound bite all the time look at that is that dan right there the photo i just saw the picture i don't know what you're saying oh and then play the other one thanks dan yeah we play that one all the time there he is again yeah thanks dan actually do we need to go to break yeah that's actually true okay we so we're gonna go to break do you have anything to say bobby before we go to break i just said that okay no i'm just kidding [Laughter] okay so sports are finally back in particular football is back and draftkings the leader in one day fantasy sports is putting you back in the center of this weekend's action with over 8 million dollars up for grabs across all of their contests to kick off the season draftkings is giving new users a free shot at one million dollar top prize with your first deposit when you use code h3h3 during sign up get in on the action now they do now in all caps and exclamation that's why that makes sense accurate i'm just trying to give the i just want to do a good read for them draft your lineup now now and feel the sweat like never before run every pass every run catch means more with a draftking lineup it's simple all you do is pick your lineup stay under the salary cap and see how your team stacks up against the competition nothing adds to the sweat of watching the game quite like having a shot at a million dollar top prize draftking has paid out over billions billions of dollars to winners since 2012 so they know a thing or two about cold hard cash ela download the draftkings app now and use code h3h3 for a limited time new users can get a free shot at one million dollar top prize and compete for over 8 million dollars in prizes across all contests don't miss this extra special week one bonus enter code h3h3 to get a free shot at the one million dollar top prize with your first deposit that's called h3h3 only if draftkings make it rain baby a minimum of five dollar deposit is required lgbt eligibility restricted apply see drifley.com for details no i'm gonna i'll read that seriously minimum a five dollar deposit is required eligibility uh restrictions apply see draftking.com for details you know ela i saw one leaf on the ground yesterday you know what that means it's not summer i hate summer summer's the worst especially in la but fall everybody loves fall and that means that me andy's got those hot fall halloween spooktacular awesome undies i still have the summer version after i just hyped fall you're gonna show these summer undies they are gonna have some bomb mother loving halloween undies coming up though but let me tell you about me undies more importantly you know there is a serious shortage of quality underwear in the world today you go online what are you going to find all this crap hanes through the loom whatever to this day i don't know where to buy underwear yeah i mean i'm serious i've been looking my whole life for good underwear and then it's like really cheap feeling it's coarse sometimes i get this one with the the waistband is super coarse and i get like it just feels horrible that's where meundies comes in they've got this the softest fabric the most breathable fabric these people care about comforting your dick and balls and your vagina is it important to the vagina to be in good underwear or is it more like the waist apparently yeah i don't know i don't have one it all matters it all matters take it from a her a girl you're right though it's more about the way i just don't know because my dick and balls is very i need i need space and but i i yeah sometimes i buy underwear and the fabric just feels so cheap and everything every time yeah that's where me andy's come in it's made from sustainable natural fiber source from sourced from beechwood called micro modal excuse me where did where was this made in outer space it's alien technology super soft it's a breathable it's life it's a light it's impossibly cozy and it's seriously comfortable everything me undies does is to help you feel truly comfortable from head to toe inside and out [Music] weird in honor of bobby lee okay but we i don't know if we talked about whatever never run don't ever run out of undies with the me undies membership a subscription that sends new pairs right to your door plus get side site wide savings and exclusive sales keep your eyes peeled for their spooky cool halloween prints mandy's has a great offer for our listeners for any first time purchase you get 15 percent off and free shipping it's a no-brainer especially because they have a 100 satisfaction guarantee that means if you don't love these undies as much as we've guaranteed today you send them back and then a dude will sniff them and but he'll give you your money back no they won't sniff no sniffing do you care if somebody sniffs your underwear after you send it back i mean what do you care not really yeah what do you care you don't see it they have a sniffer it's his job he goes yeah these were worn that is all made up and they do not do that they don't have a sniffer that i'm aware of uh get 15 off your first order free shipping and 1 billion percent satisfaction guarantee at meundies.com h3 that's meundies.com h3 so bobby you're yes ethan are you doing hypnotherapy to quit smoking is that right well i did it and um what how many secrets did i have yesterday uh three i had three yesterday yeah that's one for a pack a day to three that's really good that's pretty good i have fears of fear i just i i don't know like i don't know who this hypnotherapist is i don't know look like intake of bobby's like susceptible background i've also seen the movie old boy and i just don't i just think that bobby's gonna freaking have an octopus in his face um one night when i come home and and you know just do strange things around so so if i'm understanding you mistrust this person tinkering around in his brain yeah like i don't think that you just meet someone one day and without them knowing all the things your triggers whatever he has a long history of trauma yeah and then just start [ __ ] around and walk taking a walk in his head i don't like he's a professional yeah but he doesn't know you we didn't we didn't go to we didn't go to home depot and somebody just randomly hey you want to hypnotize me no we [ __ ] went to the best is he the best he's the king of all he looks like lex luthor yeah when therapists are bald right and he wears a scarf around his neck that's [ __ ] legit yeah right and he didn't do no [ __ ] like ball or a little thing to know he was not old-school new school new school hypno he got me in i went onto a beach in my memory so he got me all relaxed go to your favorite place i went to my favorite place right and i and i went to a different you know a world and i was completely relaxed and and he was implanting little things in my brain and i think what we don't like kala looks scared because she's like what are we implanting yeah what little seeds are we planting in your head that we're now watering he goes he i was the probably like kill kalila yeah yeah yeah exactly bts army strong yeah so you know i don't you know i've i don't know um a thousand hitting up to therapists i've met maybe two in my life yeah but from the from this guy compared to the other guy he looks seems legit that's true i think that i'm basing it up because i have i have an ex-friend who is a hypnotherapist and a reiki healer and i think that she's absolutely right wait what is reiki it's well i mean i don't know if i'm going to offend people but it sounds like [ __ ] well what is it it's like doing like oh this [ __ ] where they don't touch you they don't touch you right but it like you're supposed to feel hit just yeah it's it's it's for me it's just a little bit um quacky but you know do you think oh do you think the hypnotherapy is quacky no no i don't think i think the guy seems legit i was basing it off my friend who is a hypnotherapist and i think that she is so unqualified right right right right sort of a disaster of a baby baby baby you have you have hippie desert friends they give you crystals and then you take the crystals and you put it to the on the side of the bed no no that's not quacky no no no i have my best friend is a free diver and she collects these things from the bottom of the ocean and she brings them back from mexico and she gives them as a friend token next to the bed like it's going to illuminate like it's going to illuminate and and and it's just a cool it's like a cool marine cola do you believe that the crystal infuses your being with with some kind of energy i i i own zero crystals there are zero crystals in the shadows in the whole house i saw crystals from under water the underwater crystals whether they're from the land or underwater they're still [ __ ] crystals i [Music] let me ask some more questions here is the hypnotherapist have credentials does he have a degree of any kind he is the master of all no no no that's not what i asked okay does he have a degree okay listen i know i'm not bts okay yeah so i don't have the maybe there they could get like the grand master of a hypnotherapist right yeah i can't get i i can get like above average professional professional hypnotherapist i don't is he is he is he a psychologist does he have a background in this kind of [ __ ] or is he just some dude who puts on a scarf and he's like let's talk about yours but you want to do it devry and that's a very common hypnotherapy no he um i didn't ask that i didn't go where's your credentials i think that the george i think her producer found yeah where did you find him that doesn't sound that privileged wait what's his foundation on craigslist ask him to uh ask him to see if he has a degree you can find online yeah yeah does he have if you find a degree and it better be harvard yeah listen somebody i am curious though what is it like what is the process of getting uh hypnotized is that what you're are you being hypnotized yeah so the process is this you know he you close your eyes he and he said you're on an escalator are you laying down yeah no i'm in this chair specific specifically he came to your house no i did it through zoom so i was in this chair and i just hit him right so um he told me to go to an escalator i went up and then he goes open up a door a golden door they opened up the golden door and then he goes now you're wherever your favorite most relaxing places mine was a beach in in the philippines so i went on the beach and then all my friends were there and i laid in the water and then i kind of fell asleep and then when he said to wake up i woke up really yeah so there was like that's really interesting there was a five-minute gap there where i don't really remember what he did really why that's so interesting yeah so that i'd so what if he was just sitting there in silence i'm the dum dum dum but i don't think that's the truth it sounds like it worked no no no check it ethan ethan check it out so when he says now wake up i woke up so that means i was listening the whole time yeah no i agree you got hypnotized bro i don't like so weird to account for five minutes yeah it seems very rapey yeah yeah like would it me too well well you can zoom right in right well he kind of he kind of like date raped you a little bit because you black out and then you wake up and you don't remember what happened and he was like it was all good and you just take it it's funny that you say that because you know when i woke up my [ __ ] didn't hurt right all right she's like now think of your [ __ ] bobby walk properly for a couple days but um okay so excuse me so the point what's wrong when you do that i have gerd i have i have a gerd disease gastro uh yeah you've got bird [ __ ] i just started um getting it really badly after the whole bts fight this is actually not even a lie on our plane ride home from hawaii i just i had to get the um like a barium x-ray and everything like it was it was it was up to here all the time yeah my throat is is super flemy it's just i haven't i've had this problem for a long time i take medicine and stuff um so is that the only way is that the only thing wrong with you or no other ailments no that's just the one that's most apparent to you right now you cut out there i said that's the only one that's most apparent to you right now okay i have a lot of problems but do you have do you take psychological meds i take uh antidepressants oh you do okay yeah what about you what about you bobby i take um a couple things i take um a beta blocker and i also take um a high blood blood pressure medication i'm loaded bean i'm loaded and that one sleeping med that helps you jerk off oh he's quit he's quit since we last saw you oh really yeah i mean my my dick now is like wood i mean it i mean there's no feet like a a floating what they're gone oh it's still there i can see you yeah they're still oh no yeah i can't see you but um but there's really not a lot of feeling in my dick now you know because i don't take medication oh that's so i would think that your sensitivity would increase from stopping it no it's kind of like uh not numb but like kind of like it's not as because when you take you know i used to take unisom to masturbate and um we it the the ejaculation was so powerful yeah it was like you know when david carradine tied his neck to the door association okay and you know when kung fu did that so i don't know why kung fu would need to do that but kung fu did that and he did and then the lead singer of inexcess did that too yeah what an embarrassing way to die it must be good it must be really good though because but imagine the cops showing up the cops showing up and you're just yeah imagine you're completely naked yeah you have a like you know i mean a rope tied your neck against a doorknob or whatever and your hand is on your penis and you're just a corpse no not really are you kink shaming a dead guy because because i will say that he was probably in absolute ecstasy on his way yeah his face is like did you guys did you guys ever make love when bobby was on a unison well yeah that was one of his stipulations he wouldn't do it without the units oh my goodness so how's your love life now that he's off that stuff well can i tell you what you did the other day let me see hold on which part not virgin blake no unfortunately the other one um the other one yeah because we've never said this before i want [Music] she has a crush she has a she has a crush on somebody a celebrity a celebrity not someone she knows in person what's his first name edgar ramirez ramirez all right so can you pull up a picture ian i want to see who or two were fantasizing about is it one of the bts guys pull up taeyeon all right let's see who we got here oh interesting rug ed yeah yeah white yeah no he's uh he's he's mexican he's mexican oh he is yeah oh so so i so we're she was um i was still offended by that but you know what are you gonna do i would just i mean i would just accept the uh you just gotta ride the hip you gotta ride it you asked for it so let me ask you this when you asked were you kind of you were it was almost like a bluff right or she's like you were scared that she was gonna go crazy for for that guy edgar no i was it was a curiosity right it was like let's see if it's different if i was edgar ramirez right but the shock of the but the shock of you know realizing that you didn't mean that she would have blown edgar ramirez so much better than she normally does well it's just some it's like a one-time passion i think if she was [ __ ] edgar ramirez for you know however long you guys been together you'd probably be getting the he'd be getting a regular blow job as well bobby yeah imagine edgar ramirez saying like imagine i'm bobby lee right then you take the dick out or not yeah i think it's just uh but who was the other one you guys were mentioning what was the other one yeah we cannot talk about virgin play oh man all right you can't do me like that well hey i'm fine with it it just hurts so it's like i don't we don't want to hear on the internet right when we talk about people don't like the fact that i'm with her really why yeah yeah yeah because people will go she's only with you i'd still read it every day on comments yeah that's [ __ ] you guys have been with you for your money you know what i mean oh my god you're ugly and she's pretty so get you know hey wise up bro and people will just say that and it's like it hurts my feelings yeah so pretty your feelings i mean like completely just like [ __ ] ev my entire life before knowing you like [ __ ] everything or whoever i was before him it's all i've just been reduced to that well let me just say that um i can't believe are still yeah sorry our dogs are going crazy hold on i don't know why people can't accept that bobby would have a a beautiful loving uh girlfriend i mean bobby first of all you have a lot going for you i mean thank you i really do i'm not i'm not trying to i'm not trying to be a nice guy you're talented you're funny i mean sure you have a tiny penis but like people look past that thank you i'm just kidding i don't know how big your penis is but for me it's especially weird because you guys even have a podcast together you can see your interactions yeah you can see that it's a real relationship with lots of complexity and you know the real deal i don't know what what is there to even like but it was i think people act as if she was the first girl i've ever had right i've been with right i've been with a lot of attractive women some not as attractive as her right but no but super hot there's no i've never seen a picture of his ex where i was like oh my god so my point is is that like that's the the game that papa plays right so does that cause trouble in your guys relationship the people are always questioning the nature of your guys's love for each other no i think that if if it were to ever cause trouble it's mostly just me probably feeling bad about it in the beginning yeah then maybe like trying to figure out um how to yeah how to not um absorb that kind of you know abuse from the internet and stuff but if we figured it out and we don't talk about it so you know why the question is why did i get into stand-up what drove me right and at the when i was 23 years old i couldn't date any women because i was so shy i looked the way i did right i didn't really have great social skills i had no confidence right so i started doing stand-up and that what that did it didn't change my physical appearance right but it changed the way i felt about myself and that's i think what you know got me to be with women but the whole reason why i'm doing the i think at the end of the day um you know i do entertainment because so that i can feel more confident and so that i can you know attract people around me and just to live a bigger life so that has everything to do with it now if i if i looked the way i did i didn't have the confidence that i did and i didn't have a great job and i was had low self-esteem that i could understand in that situation right right yeah yeah and and you know it's kind of uh we have a very similar we had a very similar upbringing like a lot of um when when bobby and i first met it was like reuniting with an old friend that feeling of like wait like you understand me completely and i don't know why or how but it felt immediately like there was something there and we had so much to talk about and i just uh um i was immediately attracted to all of it in in the same in the same way you know whatever he felt for me was way way beyond you know just like the physical nature of it i mean and also like to be fair i've always liked rotund guys sorry that's always what guys i've always liked you know pear-shaped i've always liked trouble wait what was the first word of the word oh okay i've never heard that ila also likes wrote on men i don't know road time it sounds funny though yeah i mean when you're when you're making love to ethan do you feel like what the [ __ ] am i doing with this guy or no yeah all every day no but i i i like what you said because i feel like people just like they narrow down the whole thing so much to like just looks that it's so stupid like you're not just attracted to how a person looks i don't know i said well are you i no well especially women like what you do with your life is attractive you know how you carry yourself if you're if you're creative in your life i'm find that attractive you know it's it's a lot of things and if i'm just gonna date a beautiful guy it can be a dum-dum and a shallow person and i'm not gonna be attracted to him your life's gonna suck yeah it's not like it's not just that like you're beautiful or not and therefore you should date a beautiful person or not i think a lot of guys miss that that first of all really great a lot of really great women out there the looks and all that stuff is not the number one thing they're looking for in men and i have like yeah i have 50 pounds of fat on the table as i'm talking yeah yeah me too me too so um so yeah i think a lot of guys have confidence issues because they're like i'm not perfect i don't have a perfect beautiful face and body but i mean you know that shouldn't slow you down and then i i'm attracted to what i'm attracted to i'm sorry you know i mean no did god make me to go out with a four foot two vietnamese girl named ting ting maybe right but but i just you know i i found her to be beautiful right and then when we when i found out about you know her point of view about life and her heart and how she is and how she treats people that added that was like everything if guys tell me about virgin blake we're getting away from the topic here and i didn't forget i literally thought that we were away no no no oh you're a good one no all right ah who's the ver is blake okay so i had to ask my therapist this beforehand because i was like look like does does the kink that we're into at all represent who we are as people and she was like absolutely not you could be you could have like murderous fantasies in bed and that has nothing to do with who you are outside of sex so i was like okay cool because virgin blake he's of of age by the way he just happens to be a virgin when bobby becomes a virgin blake it basically takes like it takes me three i mean because how long have you guys been together again like uh we got married in 2012 so eight almost eight years so we're at almost eight years more like 13 years wow that's way long baby no do you guys um i want a baby now yeah we talked about it the last time we were on there yeah but still we're still doing that but um how how has it been now with the baby it's good can you talk now can you talk now he's starting to talk he's he's saying a lot of words he's not talking but he's saying a lot of words but he understands a lot yeah he really understands a lot yeah he he like i'll say can you go show that to dad and then he'll actually go do it like or i'll say spit it out this is what i say to him a lot now spit it out because he just picks it up off the ground dog food he loves eating dog food oh so he goes spit it out and he goes has your sleep been affected by it no we're rich we have help i mean just being honest with you but it's because i just want to be honest okay it's hard for sure even with help yes but i just need to be honest like everybody who has like some measure of success and money they talk about having kids they all have night nurses yeah they have people well we don't have at the beginning we don't have anything it's but we have a nanny that comes in the morning very early he's sleep trained so he sleeps through the night so we're pretty lucky in that way yeah he sleeps really good he almost never wakes up in the middle of the night we don't have somebody here during that time but but he he sleeps through the night he's a he's a little champion but um we both work so during the day we have to have help the first the first um six months it was the was the toughest it's really crazy the first six months but after that if they are sleep trained if you get like a really good uh uh how do you call it a nurse well what do you call the baby doula a doula to come and help you with the night train the night training and stuff then then it's then it gets it's not bad you know but what it really was just the the ultimate thing about it is just having a schedule so i never thought we could do it because we don't have a schedule ourselves like we're all over the place all the time yeah with him we just have to have a schedule so we're doing it and like you immediately see how good it is when you do it so that's why we're keeping it like you have to do everything at like in the evening at the same way dinner at 5 30 let's say and then bat and then this and that and he just follows it and he knows okay we're going to sleep now so oh so i can't sleep at like five in the morning like i normally do well you ca i mean we're trying to work on that i have the same problem yeah because i i can't fall asleep before like three and so i wake up really late but the thing is that we have a nurse that comes really early in the morning on the weekends though we don't have a nurse i prefer it that way because i want to be forced to spend the time with them and so i do feel like [ __ ] all the time and my sleep cycle is super [ __ ] up but but obviously no you don't want to i mean you don't want to sleep till you want to go to sleep at 5am when you have a kid i mean you'll look like a [ __ ] psycho your kid's gonna think that's normal behavior and that's a problem that i have because i'm really trying hard to adjust my sleep schedule now because i don't want theodore to grow up what the expectations are sleeping yeah exactly but i think i'm depressed and i have all kinds of issues that i'm trying to work through right now so see that's what i think kids gonna do but but i'm afraid that it's not gonna do what i think it's to do but what i think it's going to do it's going to curb some of my um the habits that i have you know like number one i think that it's going to make me completely quit smoking number two it's going to make me not play video games as much number three it's gonna motivate me to like do more in my career you know me more proactive well i would i think it's gonna yeah go ahead sorry to cut you off i thought you were done i am done i am [ __ ] done it's hard on these zoom calls uh yeah i wouldn't i wouldn't i would have a i wouldn't expect the kid to change bad habits you know what i mean you kind of have to like be in a good place then have the kid because i feel like beat me to it i i feel like the kid can even exhaus exacerbate bad habits because it's so stressful so hard at the beginning and and you have to be at your best to handle it because it is so hard but at the same time i i see your point it may help in some sense yeah yeah yeah you do have to follow his schedule you do have to be consistent there for him and it's going to be the most important thing for you so you're going to have to do that you know yeah i i i know this about myself i know once i see the baby there's just no way for me not to be affected by it yeah i know that i'm gonna have a cosmic experience from it yeah that i know for sure yeah right so i just know that i'm gonna look at this baby and because i you know the reason why i i can stay sober for big chunks of time is because of the fact that like you know at the end of the day it's based on i want to be present for my mom my brother and kalylah right so i just know that extreme things like that do change me mm-hmm right so i i beg to differ but they have a really different like it's basically like if you're if if you want you're about to go into a situation like they said is like super different and on top of that super stressful and all those escapist habits that you already have to get out of difficult situations right aren't going to disappear when a difficult situation presents itself you might even there's a possibility like ela said that it could be exacerbated if if the baby's crying i'm not going to go i'm going to go play warzone for five minutes yeah i'm not gonna do that either because i'm going to look at the baby and go i want i want i want to be alive for the baby i want i want to experience and i want to be there i think bobby would make i think bob would be a great person a great parent i think you should have kids i'm not saying look i know we said that last time to you guys and yeah i think that you guys would be great parents i don't want to give the wrong impression i think you guys are in a great spot i think you guys are in a loving relationship you guys are in a great financial situation you still have nine months to work on yourself yeah the clock starts the clock does start no i think you'd be a great dad bobby and uh and even if you're not a perfect dad that kid is still gonna be happy and in a good home and you're not gonna be a perfect dad nobody is a perfect parent there's no such thing but you know i'm not going to do what my dad did my dad would beat me yeah right yeah my dad beat my mom right i want to correct some of that thing yeah you're going to be a great dad all right thank you going to be a great guy we can move on but i don't like the accusations no i didn't i didn't mean to calm down on you it sounded like that yeah you'd be a great dad thank you that's all i wanted to hear yeah yeah yeah why don't you just say i'm going to be a great dad and let's move on but just so you know we're still trying to work on it ethan still stays up too late we're still we're working on it though it might take time it's like a big adjustment we've never i think we're doing a good job though yeah yeah he's happy he's very happy yeah he's a great guy what do you guys fight about like in this pandemic what is the thing that like you guys fight about um um sometimes uh well we used to fight about food a lot but not so much anymore we don't fight that much honestly to be honest ila got mad eva gets mad at me sometimes when i tweet stuff that's that's the one thing that i can think of she doesn't like sometimes i'll make tweets she doesn't like and then she'll get mad at me like a political tweet or something yeah is the same way okay with the political ones actually it's more the drama ones yeah she doesn't she gets mad when i tweet stuff do you respond to because you know i every once in a while i'll like i'll break down and i'll respond to a negative comment or a tw or or a direct message or something like somebody will say something like um you know hey dude stop doing podcasting you're bad at it and and you know sometimes i can look at something like that and go let it go let it go let it go let it go right but every once in a while go oh is that why so this many people listen you [ __ ] you know like i'll go crazy right do you respond to stuff like that well well i just no but those comments do make me sad and so i just don't read comments for the most part ah that i should do that but generally no i wouldn't respond to it because i just feel i just feel bad and then move on yeah i used to yeah i used to i just know that um it's not going to accomplish anything and that person's just going to get attention that they want and there's not you can't you can't on you can't never convince these people that you're good enough you know what i mean right yeah they're gonna hate you no matter what you say and do forever right yeah but mike my question though is why you know okay there are things there are people and music musical bands and things that i don't like right there are actors that i just find not that kind of annoying me right but and they seem to all work and all that stuff and i'm not going to name who those people i don't hurt their feelings but in no why would i go out of my way to say hey man just let you know you suck like i would never do that no i wouldn't naughty everybody why do people do that i'm really not sure i think because they're honestly i would never do that i don't think i know anyone that would do that the only way that i can imagine is that they're very uh hurt they're very bitter and jealous and mad that their life sucks i mean that's really the only explanation but it doesn't make it hurt any less no yeah yeah yeah no but but it's true i mean nobody else would leave that comment unless they were just bitterly unhappy with their life yeah yeah it's not personal is what you're saying i don't know it's never it's not personal and they're only saying it because they're like my life [ __ ] sucks and your life rules so you wouldn't they think that you would never in a million years be offended or care about what they say yeah because they see you as some invincible person you know what i mean yeah you know it's it's funny because um and this is the honest truth and it's not really that humorous but you know i've been kind of thinking to myself do i feel the same about myself and the same way about life that that i that i did felt 30 years ago and i feel the same way like you know it's like you know yeah i've had these last five years i've had some success and this has been an incredible pandemic for me i'm getting a lot of work for some reason you know i assume the worst i thought like oh for the next whenever until they have vaccine i'm not going to work or nothing's going to be happening but you know i'm still getting calls you know you know i sold a show you know congratulations on uh to abc so i'm very awesome excited about that and there's like a lot of other good things happening in my life but at the end of the day it's like i still feel like the piece of [ __ ] that i did 30 years ago right so i just don't think that it's weird like i don't feel different or you know about myself or you know what do you say 30 years ago how how do you mean like in like does success affect happiness that kind of no because i i just feel like you know people go people tweet at me or they say negative things like look at this guy this guy you know shouldn't be killing it or sh you know i mean or why can't i be you know but i just want to tell these people that listen i still feel like a piece of [ __ ] yeah we all you know that's the thing yeah yeah i i don't feel different than you i'm not a god i'm like you cannot harm me mortals yeah yeah i don't that hurts my feelings yeah yeah yeah i get i'm as sensitive you uh i have you know depressive depressing days yeah you know i'm self-conscious you know there's all these things that never really went away you know i'm the same guy right but then people like attack me like i'm as if i'm supposed to be here when i'm always i've always been here you know it's just an odd psychological thing that i have to do yeah i think i i think i've i've been through that that cycle too honestly the only solution i've ever found that's had any success for me is just you have to really just not engage or read in the comments because you know what it is it's like people talking about you and you eavesdropping on a conversation about you it's like a conversation you're not meant to be a part of or to know even what people are saying in the real world let's say you go to high school and there's 5 000 people at your high school you're not supposed to know what every single person in that high school says about you in every conversation right you go crazy and also what they would say behind your back they want to say to your face and they may not even mean let's be honest right that's what i mean like sometimes you can be really mean when you're just talking like to someone else but you don't mean you talk to that person you would never say that to their face you ever done that where you talk [ __ ] about someone and then afterwards you're like i don't mean that at all i like that person yeah you know what i mean yeah i do it all the time that's a really good way to frame that good way to frame it so you have like i've even said things like you know i to somebody just to if somebody says i like this movie and i'll go that movie sucks but i've seen the movie 50 times the director of that movie you'd probably be like dude big fan yeah oh yeah all right love that movie well i've also said good things about people but i don't even mean it oh no that's not good no but i i'm a big fan and i go i hate that guy okay but but so like the point is right yeah the point is i don't want to name the person but i remember being on the paramount lot and i saw oh my god here's this jackass you know i [ __ ] hate this guy right and i went i'm a big fan i think i had to do tears in my eyes you know what he said he goes he goes um thanks and he just kind of like did and then i went oh i hit it even more so but the point is that these are not these aren't really real reflections of people's hearts and souls and so the only you can't really live your life sanely and reading all this [ __ ] about yourself you just have to put out your thing uh i do find that when i don't look at anything i am happier it's just that simple because just don't look at anything and i'm walking around in my daily and i'm happier yeah you don't care and when i do stop and look at this [ __ ] it makes me feel bad every time because look all you can do is you put you do your thing you have the people in your immediate life in that room with you now you let's say you do an episode of podcast you're like that was good i felt good that was a fun episode so you put it out and you leave with that feeling or you say you say that podcast uh we could have improved on these things but you know it's not that serious you just like mental note we can improve on that you walk out you live your life you know if you go to the comments it will ruin your [ __ ] day and by the way it will pollute the actual productive thoughts you had about it in either case right you're like i'm going on my day and have a good day they're like not [ __ ] you your day's real even have a podcast yeah yeah wait that's the thoughts you're gonna end up with yeah let's say you have a bad podcast and then of course everybody's just talking about this one awkward moment they're gonna amplify it and make it a million times worse you know already in your mind that oh that's something i can work on and prove but they're going to ruin your whole [ __ ] year so you like how much better off would you be not even knowing that conversation's happening you're right you're right you're right you're right that's going to stop doing that like sometimes i fish for it and it's not yeah of course yeah we all do yeah now let me ask you guys what do you guys do because i want to comment on political things but i don't i don't i do i'm not i'm not going to tell people what i am politically right now i don't want to get into it but but like but when i'm on i literally will read something and i'll go out of my mind i can't [ __ ] believe it i feel like we used to be like that we used to try to stay out of politics and i'm i just grew tired of that it felt like genuine we're not fully expressing ourselves and i'd rather i enjoy listening to people i like talk about politics and then i figured why wouldn't we just talk about what we are thinking right now you know so first of all it's not for everyone and i'll warn you if you do there's so many people online especially that will [ __ ] hate your guts for it that's why we stopped doing it that's why we stopped doing it yeah this guy is also as utter hate but it is really coming from a political place sometimes you know what's that once i got uh i'm not even really political but let's say once i started being more outspoken with my political thoughts there was like a huge [ __ ] concerted effort from like right lane right influencing things and it comes in all kinds of word first of all you get people who are just mad at you in the comments and but but yeah you're gonna get [ __ ] for it but in my case i i feel like my whole schtick has always been calling out [ __ ] where i see it and so one of my for me it felt hypocritical to just look away and not be true to myself in that regard right so like yeah it's risky and it's gonna it can cause you a lot of [ __ ] and it's true what people say you know it's everywhere people say that it's everywhere why do i need to see it here whatever i think that the reason we um i i at least hesitate or i tell you let's not speak on something is because we're not as versed as you guys we don't find ourselves i'm not bright enough i'm not bright enough to defend my position me too that's the problem i'm not either not either yeah no i know exactly what you mean and so there are certain times when i get into it and i'm like i'm honestly i don't i don't know what i'm talking about but here's a is it possible that nobody knows what they're talking about yeah very impossible so people are just better at sounding because who can even figure out what the [ __ ] is going on in this world i mean what is really happening you know yeah i can just tell from my personal perspective as a listener to other people when there's a person i like and then they talk about politics i like listening to them talk about it because i like this person and i and they usually say it the way i'm thinking you know they usually express what i'm thinking and i'm so frustrated about something and they'll say it and it's fun to listen to but so yeah there are certain things you could talk about that don't require you having an intimate knowledge of policy for example uh eric what's his name eric is that is that his unloved son yes eric trump yes trump the biggest so he tweeted out this morning and i quote tweeted him he says here pull it up can you pull it up ian you guys got to see this it's the dumbest [ __ ] thing i've ever seen and i'm like okay and i'm just like why are we putting this guy up on a pedestal he's a [ __ ] he is literally a [ __ ] brain dead imbecile pull this up i mean like people are really putting this guy on a pedestal um so he goes google is once again trying to manipulate americans type mob or mobs into google and watch what comes up do the same on any other search engine and what showed up is this anime mob cycle 100 the character's name is mob and he thinks this is some incredible conspiracy theory to keep people from seeing what a mob is on google images because he doesn't know what a what this anime is i mean i mean this is a great one by the way so like i'm not i don't need to make some great political statement and just to know that he's a [ __ ] [ __ ] right and so i just i wish you didn't show me that yeah that that i mean i wish you didn't show me that yeah and so i just quote tweeted and said imagine being this dumb [Music] yeah yeah yeah i think that you know i um i think i'm gonna start doing it a little bit more i have moments of being fired up but i don't try to i try to sort of um argue amongst like my own circle of people that i know because i feel like that's that's if i'm gonna have any impact it's probably going to be in that small little microphone that's smart and it's true and then work my way out because like especially in the filipino community we have a lot of um we have a lot of issues with race uh with the colonial mentality um with a lot of self-loathing that reflects on who we choose as our leader so i try to get into like those smaller discussions and it's yeah even in those small discussions it's really it gets really ugly very fast yeah it's like when it's like when the [ __ ] [ __ ] face leader of the free world right says kung flu or the china virus right which is saying a lot now and people don't realize that it affects people that look like me living in this country yeah i don't understand why they don't see the connection that you know p the mob right or a group of people are gonna view me as if i'm some sort of some implication that i had something to do with the virus and i'm gonna you know and now you most likely have the virus like right right and asians are now getting like you know hit in the face on the middle of the street you know and and he did people don't realize that connection but and i'm so afraid to even talk about it right because i don't want to get attacked by these people right so it's like a weird [ __ ] thing so you know what i want to start saying things you know right because that that is hurtful when he says [ __ ] like that yeah but you know like what ethan says just say it and then feel good about it yeah let it live and feel good that you said it think about it before you put it out make sure it's what you want to say yeah and then just let it live and be happy and let me let me spell check it because you have yeah you want to make sure it's all spelled i really it's i've been with him for seven years right and the cutoff spell how dare you what oh that literally everyone was like what you should at least be self-aware i guess i used to be better i mean i've known worse i've known worse spellers yeah yeah i'll make him take whole posts down because of kudos dan just screamed at me like damn apparently i got a spelling issue it's just just the other day you had you had a pretty bad one on a tweet and so wait what did i misspell in a tweet oh geez oh because first of all everybody in the group chat spell checked it and nobody corrected me [Laughter] i literally showed the tweet to everybody in our whatsapp on the podcast and nobody corrected it and i'm the bad speller i was busy or something he was busy anyway but but bobby i think you you tap into a good point it's like i uh it's like um they they this is what they want right they they they rule by this this this fear and and they make it like uh you can't speak up for your own well-being i mean yeah we have a president that's perpetuating racial stereo harm very hurtful harmful racial stereotypes against you yeah and so why the [ __ ] shouldn't you speak up yeah and i feel and i should because i have a voice and i should for the the millions of [ __ ] asians out there that need a voice you know and i'm being a coward because you know i just don't want to [ __ ] get involved but i have these deep feelings about it right of rage you know yeah and i just don't get why people don't understand that that what he's saying is divisive and that it's causing because they like that dude because those these are the times we're living in it's sad and it's it's upsetting because the people who like and love donald trump like that it's defensive and harmful because they don't look like you and they think it's [ __ ] they think it's great that it's triggering people because you know i saw him at a rally and he goes you know uh the wuhan flew and then he was like kung fu the kung flu and he's like the kong flew and everyone's like yeah i mean [ __ ] yeah [ __ ] yeah and it's it and you when you watch you go you what's amazing is he has shown us the amount of people that back that kind of ideology isn't that shocking when you see polls when you see polls you go what that many people it's so just eye-opening right that's you know you're talking about 45 percent yeah in the polls right and you and that's if you look at that i mean that means that when you're in the midwest you have to kind of look around half these people and you know that we've forever changed just in the last four years too and um proof of that is four years ago the most profound and earth-shattering thing we watched was um going clear the the documentary about scientology yeah yeah and then two days ago we saw it we watched it because we wanted our niece to watch it and it was the most boring thing we've ever done yeah yeah we have been like you know we're so jaded now but you know what but even beyond like the um even beyond fighting the hate and and propaganda and racism i just think that they're really ripe for satire because it's a bunch of [ __ ] white trash bozos and a bunch of girls whoa ethan whoa you're right but you're right but whoa i think it's a no but it's so ripe for commentary these people there's so much comedy to make out of this stupidity that donald trump donald trump is a such an oaf and his family it's such [ __ ] bimbos it's a family of bimbos yeah and everyone surrounding him and all these pundits and everybody i mean there's just there there are a bunch of [ __ ] hateful morons tucker carlson looks like like he's perpetually lost and confused i love his bow ties though he's cute but but i'm just saying i'm gonna eat some oatmeal yeah but you know what enrages me more okay so i saw on the internet right some you know a white older white conservative guy he was a chad right and he's berating some you know black people about something right and next to him was an old his wife who was an old asian lady and she's like yeah you all right you know she's like defending you know her husband right those those asians right that you hang out with they drive me yes [ __ ] crazy that's what keeps them up at night yeah i hate you know what like mitch mcconnell mcconnell's wife what's her name um i forget remember like one time trump had a press conference and here's this like concubine that's why i said concubine they're [ __ ] concubines all right they bind their feet they walk on their back and they they go and they do that all the whole thing it [ __ ] drives me crazy you think she's like a race trader yeah there's a betrayal there you know i i feel that i just i you know yeah there's a lot of that too in the filipino community yeah and there's so much it really that's that's the one thing that i see it's like but it also comes from a colonial mentality thinking that um you have a seat at their table because you've kind of been um yeah you it it it warps the way you you you view yourself and then you sort of praise your abuser so that's that's very for filipinos it's a lot it's very much because we've been um colonized by our whole history of our country right yeah it's like when you go to thailand i've been to thailand right and uh you know i shot a movie there once where i was out there for months and i would walk down the street and i would see a 70 year old american white man holding hands with like an 18 year old right asian girl right and they're just walking down the street all confident with their with you know with basically you know it's like it's pedophilia that's what it is right and you see that and i don't know what it is about that but it drives me [ __ ] crazy and for some reason i equate you know you know a certain section of trump supporters like that you know i don't know there's a connection there for me right of like users or you know i will say though not to over generalize because first of all i know what you mean but i do think that like there's a large section of trump supporters that are racist just shitty divisive trolls whatever but a lot of the people are just like think they they just think he's an honest politician that he's different and he says it like it is and he doesn't mean all that stuff he says or maybe they don't even pay attention and they don't understand you're right they're good they are good people but they don't they don't understand and it's hard to understand because let's say that they're watching fox news and according to fox news everything's [ __ ] great you know i try to soften my feelings for like old white politicians by trying to imagine them in their little sleepy hat before they go to bed at night like and i think about their old you know how like old man smell yeah like because my dad was an old guy and i just imagine like oh they probably have that old man smell and they probably have the liver spots like all over and they probably wear their little sleepy hat before even trump even biden so i think okay like maybe they're not as evil yeah they're not i don't think i think there's very few people in this world that are actually evil but but what can you do because i think there are some evil people that like like i don't know it's kind of evil to run a uh ad on facebook that says like hillary clinton rapes kids or something knowing that that's not true yeah i don't know do you ever google the top 10 most evil people that ever lived on the planet no google that who ranks them i don't know that like on rancor makes that list it's very interesting made by god i have no idea god made this list yeah hey ian can you pull up top 10 most evil people i think i i mean you guys before you do that before that let's get let's try to guess okay hitler number one try to guess all right so no no let's just say so i think stalin should be is it in there okay here's an interesting one vlad the impaler wait you know what i have a feeling he's already looked at this because i have a vague memory of him recycling i already know what about gangnam style no he's not maybe maybe he's top 20 but that was pretty brutal he's not a top genghis khan is like people who like sonic youth like there's a cult he's like yeah i love that band uh daydream nation is a great album but my point is is that i think um what's that guy's name uh his name is hitler yes yes thank you for bringing him up yeah yeah so adolf hitler's on it um paul pogba we said he's asian so vlad the impaler is a little bit more obscure and that's how i know you probably look at this list yeah yeah yeah yeah so i'm thinking who else we got i mean i think some of the imperialists who came to america and cut all the natives like uh who's the spanish dude who like gave all the natives smallpox and killed like like half a million to america what was his name chris i'm not sure no was it wasn't columbus who gave them smallpox was it uh it was a spanish dude intentionally yeah uh i mean who went to mech like uh cortez osama bin laden we should be on the list magellan magellan okay pull it up and pull it up pull it up pull it up yeah here we go you guys want me to do a top 10 voice coming in here are the 15 most evil people to have ever been born okay coming in at number one adolf hitler adolf hitler killed nine million people six million jews he did not like jews people all right number one coming in at number two joseph stalin i said stalin he killed a hell of of his own people because oh vladimir's number three bro one for bobby point for bobby why did you even think to say that i kind of agree that you must have cheated on this test who even knows who vlad the impaler is i do uh pol pot there we go himmler oh another not say that the nazis are topping the list saddam i mean he's i think he's black oh okay yeah yeah can you expand there's gotta be diversity here you gotta have put a black eye in there wait hey i don't see there needs to be diversity here we're getting some photos there we go okay white dude saddam yeah he could be mexican right there oh yeah let's see let's read about him he was in uganda he promised to bring prosperity but a week later he did call himself president as dictator became known as the butcher of uganda killed people by feeding them to crocodiles like he was also a cannibal and mutilated one of his wives and re-arranged her limbs he killed and tortured around half a million people so congratulations to edie amin for making it to number seven better try next better luck next time yeah yeah okay i haven't terrible ivan the terrible yeah he looks terrible he does he looks mean yeah you wanna that's cool that's a cool look keep going ian people don't keep going [Music] yeah see i don't even know these people are too low on the list but keem kim kim sung the second i mean who are we talking about wait they put all of them in the same list kim kim song kim jong-il it sucks because they're probably like two of them are in heaven going we tied they're upset you know man we don't get our own category yeah that's true that's kind of a dis nero man this uh yeah oh this guy doesn't have a photo that's how old he is genghis god made it there he is that's me that's my [ __ ] headshot hang on let me make this dude look just like me here you probably are related i mean he raped that many people my god his bloodthirsty nature led to many victories such as many parts of china but also the killing of countless people it is believed that his men if out of water would drink blood from their horses his arms killed 15 million people uh a total of 20 to 60 million people died during his reign god bless him number 13. now a lot of asians a lot of asians on the list that's interesting yeah yeah it's interesting who's this idiot who's this guy wait what who's this freak he looks like the evil maximilian look at that oh this is the arena terra guy yeah he only killed a hundred thousand loser i i lose her coming in at the bottom of the list at number 15 maximilian robosphere with a hundred thousand people murdered rose pierre robespierre thank you zach wow no women oh no women no women what about those that's interesting i feel like they if they had the agency back then they would there'd be some on the list yeah oh that's true no gays how would you know that i don't know how would you know that bobby yeah okay well i can do it genghis khan for sure he didn't bend dudes over and like [Laughter] historically in china homosexuality was actually so okay and a long time ago in china and it was not it so yeah it would make sense that genghis khan all right well it's okay i feel like genghis khan [ __ ] at least one dude in his life yeah just to try it sure because dracula is is based on vlad the impaler but the impaler he has to have fun so he has the funny exactly yeah so he seems gay yeah yeah yeah you are good you who is gay why are you gay can you guys hear that yeah what is that it's a sound bite there's this guy uh it's really funny video of some african guy who's really he's really sweet and genuine he just doesn't understand the concept of homosexuality or or trans so there's this trans person who comes on and he goes why are you gay and and then she goes well i'm trans i'm not gay and he goes so who is gay is he asian is it another african oh i african i see who is good you know what i've never googled the nicest people that's ever lived oh we can do that [Applause] that's easy i feel like i mean all i can think of is yeah who else is nice oh mr rogers who else is nice for some nicest people elmo mother teresa um elmo yeah elmo wasn't mother teresa secretly a douche or was that someone else i think that gandhi was secretly kind of a pedo wait wasn't mother teresa like letting people die and [ __ ] and like it came out that she was like actually a horrible person oh she would have been canceled by now i think yeah oh gandhi was [ __ ] kids i don't think i think that what i read was he would um test his willpower by laying next to his like 14 year old nieces but he didn't [ __ ] him i'm not sure the extent he's like i failed guys it's you know one time you know i used to think that deepak chopra was like a god i did i did and then one time one time my buddy goes yeah deepak chopra and his family ate at my restaurant i go uh-huh and he goes they only left a five percent tip and as soon as i heard that shout out i shattered it wow yeah i burned all his books seven spiritual losses i burned all that i mean dude if you're deepak you gotta what are you doing walking around you gotta [ __ ] put down twenty percent i have a question to you guys then oh yeah so let's say someone were to pay for dinner do you look at how much they're tipping just so the um the they whoever doesn't think that you you guys are cheap i well first of all i usually just go out with my family and i always pay we've been in situations where we were with friends and then yeah we would look at the tips sometimes they leave a really bad tip and i'm like dude you can't yeah yeah because then the wait staff will think that you guys well you know i have famous friends who or they go ten percent where i max out they like make a whole point about it oh no and actually you know what we've even been banned from restaurants because of it i swear to god we stopped going to a specific restaurant because my our one friend tipped so badly that we got we he got beef with one of the waiters no really i swear to god wow and it was our favorite restaurant too and then we're like we can't go there anymore i used to eat with a rich when i was poor i kind of want to say her name because she died a [ __ ] i'll say it well well she's dead you don't have to it's not important to the story what's her name bobby oh no i'm not going to say but she was a powerful rich old lady all right it's everyone twice not every once well only twice she took me to dinner right and she left she leaves no tip and she's american she's not european american yeah yeah so the first time i ate with her she so the second time i ate with her i knew that she was gonna give a tip so i had money that i put into a little ball like crunch it up in a ball right and so when we got up from the table i just threw it on the table you didn't want her to see it i knew that she wasn't she didn't see it no you don't want to offend her like yeah what are you doing because you're so [ __ ] cheap you know i don't want to say get into that conversation right yeah so i just wanted to just put it give it give it to the waiter yeah i hate it i because i [ __ ] i used to wait tables me too yeah yeah we all the it's the worst feeling yeah when you work your [ __ ] ass off and they leave you no [ __ ] tip or or they leave little yeah it's it i used to like lose sleep over that [ __ ] because they don't realize how you know you know how you have you you come to work and they go hey sally didn't show up you have to take on her tables too so you have [ __ ] 10 tables you're running around you have ketchup mustard you don't mean you have like the fork you know what i mean somebody had a dirty you have to memorize all these issues and you're just constantly running running running running running running running right and then you [ __ ] end of the shift you know you have no money i gotta tell you right waiting money one of the hardest most exhausting jobs i've ever had yeah you're moving like a so fast and then like mistakes happen obviously because you're moving so fast and furious and then it's just horrible people are so crazy when yeah i feel like my whole memory of it is just like the worst in people like it just brings the worst in people yeah the customers hate you the kitchen hates you the bar hates you everyone hates you i just it's all negative for me yeah i don't know why people go this system is [ __ ] up i'm not leaving a tip i think only rich people say that and then they go but it's like dude this waiter is not getting rich off your [ __ ] tip yeah yeah yeah yeah five dollars dude they need it yeah we tip double when um when the service is horrible because we assume that they're having a bad day wow no that's not that's not what i do we hang out with that guy he like splashed the soup into her face like this guy threw it as a frisbee yeah like a hug and he just threw it like a frisbee and it splattered yeah yeah so that's how i do it i do got a double tip he did when i get really shitty service and i like the food and i like the restaurant i leave double so the next time i go in there and if i so happen to have the same waiter he knows right that i'm a good tipper that he treats me differently well maybe he thought his behavior his initial behavior was what got him the double tip so he's going to keep pouring soup in your throat yeah you're into that that's your king it's your kink he's like oh this guy have to be mean to blake over here [Laughter] you know you know what my brother you know what my brother and i like to do is we we went to a wendy's once and dinen what you dined in no we no because we wanted to get their cone okay right of ice cream is it embarrassing to dine in that wendy's you're right yeah super embarrassing i've done so my brother it was in korean town so my brother and i went and and the lady was so rude when we asked because she i guess the machine was like not on or whatever so she gave an attitude like right and so i didn't like her attitude so when she gave me the thing i threw it in the trash and i ordered it again well how did she respond he was even more furious than but my brother and i were laughing so hard oh my god my brother thought that i was going to keep ordering it because we would repay for it right yeah it's all good yeah i hate that service yeah it drives me crazy oh my god what's the biggest [ __ ] up you had as a waiter oh my god i had so many i i got a lot of complaints because my thumb was in the food really ah that's the best because because i have little hands right yeah i have little hands so some of the the plates are big right yeah so i can't so i had to do it by the edges and my thumb would be in the food whatever that means so many people saw your thumb in the food and then didn't say anything or just like i gotta eat it but this dude's in the food but it's also like it was a breakfast place so my thumb would be in an omelette oh no dude right so it would puncture the almond the cheese would be on my you're dripping over my thumb right so yeah right you know we're really spineless about things like that like if that were to happen to us if there was a hair in our food or food was [ __ ] we're spineless we don't we don't say a word we just nod and say it's delicious it's great receiving the food pretend to eat it and then just go absolutely i think most people do that's what i'm saying how many people but i'll be like i'll be like with you like this is the this is [ __ ] awful i hate it this is the worst food how's your food it's great that's what that's what we do that's what we are it's great yeah thank you so much there was a place called oscars and i ordered bread sticks and i swear to [ __ ] in the middle of the bread stick there was a [ __ ] nail a human oh like a like a fingernail no not a fingernail a hammer not a fingernail a [ __ ] nail and so i ate the bread stick and i just left the nail oh my god but i didn't complain i ate ate the whole [ __ ] hey just so you guys yeah there was a nail in my red stick yeah the experience here is better i think americans are more polite yeah and israel don't give a [ __ ] which i kind of learned from you and i like that i think that's great but i think in israel people are very confrontational i dare you to try to return a meal in israel that'd be like the [ __ ] yeah can i tell you story i got but i was ordering food during my lunch break in israel this is the kind of [ __ ] you can expect to see woman's on the phone i'm getting a to-go box you know it's like a box it's got different containers and then she picks up the to-go box and she puts her [ __ ] cell phone in the to-go box to rest there [Laughter] she goes can i help you and her phone that she was just on she is in the box she's about to put food in yeah yeah what did you do i was a [ __ ] and i took the food and i ate it all right because i was just too embarrassed i was like wait the phone was in the food no no before before the food was scooped up i couldn't believe what i was saying and i i still took it because i was in israel i think israel is a little behind on like hygiene in general being like yeah yeah oh yeah another example dude's making shawarma whatever he's got gloves on right and then you're paying with dollar bills and he's handling the money with the gloves and then touching your food it's like what do you yeah the gloves to protect his hands not me yeah yeah yeah yeah it's so weird just like did you say anything no of course not yeah me either i would like yeah i don't i i'm very like i i i zone in on those behaviors in america but if it were to happen in a different country for some reason like i allow it yeah like i only because yeah it's kind of like common it will be everywhere once you start pointing it out it will be your day like you just have to point it out everywhere yeah i tried it once when i ordered like a sabi it's like a falafel kind of in pita and they the guy wasn't wearing gloves and i was like that was like after i've been kind of americanized by ethan and i was like can you wear gloves oh my god thought you were crazy right a little bit he's like [ __ ] what the [ __ ] he was like what the [ __ ] that's crazy yeah yeah of course and then he went gloves but then he handled money with the gloves exactly dude let me tell you israel is a shock to me when i first went there you go to the grocery store okay the floor is [ __ ] coated in dirt yeah it's not shiny like here like dirt so beautiful and then they have like the bread rolls and [ __ ] people just bare-handed throw it back in yeah yeah olives yeah pickles huge buckets yeah just i mean it's a whole different world dude yeah i think that there is one stark difference between like at least asian countries or foreign americans are not good um post poop wipers also the gr i've seen i've never seen so many women wipe back to front like i have in america the front oh women oh really i never known it back to front wipers they they take the toilet paper and it and and it goes into the vagina the vagina no it starts in the ass and then goes into the vagina why does it know that way that's what i'm saying like i never saw it until i came to america and i was in shock because i was like wait who taught you that yeah who do you how many people do you know that does that and how how do you know that about that and you know what uh girls that i went to nursing school with who are nurses now who still wipe back to front that is so weird well you know like girls all congregate in the bathroom like we go out we go drinking or they go over to your house we pee together and you see those things and you're like right wow remember remember i made love to that girl once and she had poo in her ass i don't remember i wasn't there oh yeah i told you i told you the story wait what happened why what happened tell me everything i was i was doing i was i was in la jolla and i was doing her um doggy style oh yeah this is the girl who was like singing you love songs she's really sweet i smell poo oh right you know because you know you know the smell of poo yes right when you're doing it you're like it's not sex smell it's poop i was doing it right you know and you look around when you always look around you go where's the move right but then you i kept going i go no that's definitely poo right and so i i took my thumbs right and i spread open her butt cheeks and i looked and it was there was like a long butt hair yeah sticking out but at the tip of the butt hair there was a dingleberry it was old news yeah it looked like a mushroom it wasn't a fresh poo yeah yeah and so i i tried to you know what i mean you touched it no i tried to flick it oh dude i tried to flick it because that's you know i mean i still came would you have you did i still came i still came did you leave yeah oh i feel like i would have maybe wrapped it up was she attracted a girl in her ass yes today i was on i was on twitter yesterday and i saw that odell beckham was trending and i you know who will be still grossed out by that story i'm taking a minute to recover yeah um but he's a football player yeah he's a wide receiver right yeah yeah he played for the cleveland browns so basically one of his ex-lovers came out and said that he likes to be [ __ ] on hell yeah yeah why would you say that publicly i don't know but she was on no jumper and she said that he he likes like really unshowered coochie and he likes to be um pooped on yeah some people are into that i don't know why that's poo i thought you were into poo you like to smell it yeah he sniffs our dog's poos oh gross bobby i hate the smell of their poop you put it right up to your nose i really hate it no no no listen why it's it's not like i go i i don't do that that's the asian adult bobby i like to smell horrible things huh okay i like to smell horrible things that's a like why would you smell poop yes he does so he when he knows i'm going in and i try to lock the door he he fishes the lock goes right up to me in the toilet and he goes so yeah baby to anyone who says you're a gold digger remember what this relationship is and know that it's real yeah it's not only that like you know how many underwear she sees like brown [ __ ] nothing not even a stain it's clumps of [ __ ] in my underwear bobby why why are you [ __ ] your body i have a leaky ass like my dad wait you have a leaky ass yeah my dad you sharked a lot no so my dad when my okay so my my brother when he was 11 years old had a friend over and they were playing this casio kind of keyboard thing you know and my dad was taking a nap okay so my dad when he wake my dad from a nap he gets violent so my dad ran into my brother's room but my dad was completely naked because he sleeps naked he took the case casio keyboard and smashed it on my brother's head keys were flying all over the place right and when he turned around to leave he had toilet paper sticking out of his [ __ ] right and that's when we realized that my dad puts toilet paper in his [ __ ] and later when my later in life i asked why he does that he goes and my mom said that he went to the doctor he has a leaky [ __ ] right so i that i feel like i have pain yeah i have a very leaky [ __ ] i don't know which part is more disturbing the beating or the your dad's [ __ ] being corked with toilet paper it's the the [ __ ] the [ __ ] the beating was a normal thing the beating was a normal thing very violent in my home you know look at now now you stuff toilet paper up your ass do you stuff toilet paper up your [ __ ] no no no no okay i literally i i don't want to be like that so i just let it flow he free bleed oh my god yeah i do yeah but if you're if your diet is good wouldn't the turds be like because i feel like it would only leak if you had like diarrhea right oh my god it's if your diet is good that doesn't necessarily mean that your app your [ __ ] is going to be [ __ ] always solid oh well i did yeah bobby if i can interject do you do you or do you not have a pizza refrigerator i do but you know do you think that has anything to do with your leaky [ __ ] i might maybe maybe maybe maybe but those are the reasons why i want to tell the guys that accuse her for being with me because i you know right it's like she has to see right and experience the worst human atrocities yeah that one can see right and she's still with me no it's like he's beautiful my foot fungi my [ __ ] stains you know what i mean absolutely so but it's kaleilas still with me but i i do but i kind of like even though i in that moment i don't like that it's happening i i do like that you're playful in that way like that's what i'm attracted to is that he's so just not by the book about anything and he's such a human tornado that i i feel really drawn to that um to that storm can i ask you so you'll be taking a dump and bobby is pick locking the lock while you're taking a dump uh-huh and do you say anything what do you say to him like stop don't come in and bobby's screaming stop don't come in and then every time and i'm trying to i need it if poop is halfway up my butt i just chance it and do a half stand up to try to close the door oh my gosh um and so you're taking it the door was open he would just come hang out with you inside yeah wow deep inhales like she doesn't she doesn't fart in front of me or any of that kind of stuff and everyone sh like twice a year i'll out here i'll hear a fart from you but that stuff doesn't turn me off she thinks it's going to turn me off i don't think anything of it it's just awesome what are you gonna yeah well i don't think it's going to turn you off i just prefer not to there's this whole house already smells like [ __ ] i'm i'm trying not to contribute more to the to the overall aroma of our lives but i want to go back yeah so bob bobby have you gotten really good at pick locking that bathroom door uses a safety pin and it's one of those things where there's a little hole right and you just put the pin in and it opens it yeah and then and then he comes in and puts his head between your legs like in the bowl no man oh okay you just come out oh i'm a serial killer okay so you just come hang out and bask in the smell i just come into the bathroom right and i go i do a big sniff so i can just see if you know she's healthy or not and then i leave he does this thing where he pretends to not enjoy it he's like ooh ooh yeah yeah and also if i'm like if i'm taking a nap and i'm on my side he'll ambush he'll come in and just spread the cheeks and try to take a deep breath you put your nose in her [ __ ] and sniff bro what's the weirdest thing what's the weirdest smell you like i like um like a dead bird oh no i don't like the birds that's really sad i don't like that what's wrong with you i think it did i think just death in general like a dead bird so you went up you found a dead rotting dead bird and you sniffed the [ __ ] out of it well do you remember the bird that died in the backyard yeah it didn't smell like anything did you smell it up close no i did yeah it didn't smell good i don't think you should be sniffing birds in the age of a pandemic so i i made a i've got a shoe box that's why they call it kung flu because you look at this [ __ ] dead bird so it's cool i took the shoe box and i put the dead bird in the shoe box and i put like remember i made it nice like a little bedding yeah we made a we had a burial yeah before i because i taped it up too but before i did that i went i smelled it i hated it but that means you liked it right yeah i hated it and then i closed it back up and i taped it we buried it i like the smell of um you know when you have a earring hole oh and when you press on it and the little stuff comes out if you've been very easy yeah sorry what i didn't this is i didn't know about this yeah the [ __ ] they're [ __ ] in your ear hole yeah it's like it's like sharp cheddar but it's very um addicting like you just it's very an intriguing smell do you get that behind your ear ever because i know a smell behind my ear that smells like that i don't get in behind my hair just in the actual ear hole if i push on it in a little you know about that smelly hair just to me because i rarely wear earrings you have cheese in your ear hole so i feel like sometimes when i do put the earring in after a long time it kind of gets irritated and then afterwards when i take it out and there's like that kind of that smell you smell that bobby no i want to yeah you should i'm i'm i'm glad you said it because i really want to smell it oh gladly can you do it right now no no no i don't have any right now only when like says when it gets yeah yeah what other weird smells girls have do you ever scratch your vagina and smell your hand what would you ask that i'm kidding i have a lot of curiosity well then check it out for yourself yes ethan um it was good to see that's it i mean that's pretty much it is there anything else no i mean i mean i i could honestly probably do another two hours one day i think so i mean how long have we gone together two hours two hours two hours yeah i love you guys yeah i love you too guys we love you guys hopefully after the pandemic i'd like to see you guys in flesh that would be nice i know mm-hmm dry days are you guys seeing anybody at all dude i'm getting so sick of it i'm getting so [ __ ] sick of it dude i just want to like also i feel so bad for theodore because he's he's this young vibrant boy who wants who should be out looking at the zoo and socializing with kids and he's happy at home he doesn't know what he's missing but like it's it's it's just it's tough it's getting tough yeah it'll it'll pass but i ain't playing a lot of video games at night what are you playing lately i play a lot of warzone you know that um what's her name yoko ono has a song called warzone that's really funny not really yeah you should hear the game though is it no what do you play what do you what do you play ethan i just been playing like super little games like i've been playing hollow knight you know that game oh no i'm sure it's good i don't like multiplayer games it's too stressful yeah yeah i get to i get too competitive and and the problem is i get competitive and also i'm not good yeah i'm not good either but you know warzone you have an xbox or a station so warzone and um um it's all across all platforms like if you have a playstation i have an xbox we can still hold on the there's probably some i don't know if you can hear the dogs oh we'll just we'll just end it here i love you okay that's it bye bobby love you thank you all right i love you and bye take care
Info
Channel: H3 Podcast
Views: 735,924
Rating: 4.6606636 out of 5
Keywords: h3 podcast, h3h3 podcast, the h3 podcast, the h3h3 podcast, h3h3productions, h3h3, h3, ethan klein, hila klein, ethan and hila, ethan & hila, bobby lee, khalyla kuhn, tiger belly, bobby and khalyla
Id: c8MLEkjLrPM
Channel Id: undefined
Length: 117min 21sec (7041 seconds)
Published: Thu Sep 10 2020
Related Videos
Note
Please note that this website is currently a work in progress! Lots of interesting data and statistics to come.