Bobby's Ex Sarah Hyland, Surprise! | TigerBelly 290

hey sarah what do you remember my dad i do there he is [Laughter] yes you remember no you remember all right all right so um you want me to introduce the show yeah but don't don't say anything until we say your name that's the rule okay you can do whatever the [ __ ] thank you [Music] you guys i'm taking the glasses off this may very well be the most special at least in my opinion tiger belly episode um i don't know if you can see that bobby is visibly i feel because of the face stuff that you gave me me too it's amazing that's face stuff thank you guys for joining us this week we have a very very very special guest introduce everyone in the room first that's how we do it oh shut the [ __ ] up all right sorry he's so nervous but first let me introduce everyone in the room to my right there we go my lover my king the captain of my ship mr bobby lee to my other right is the one and only good white mr george kimmel soon to be daddy to my left is flat flat 2d filipino gilbert gallon i'm kalylah and today we have a very very special guest um she is not only beautiful very funny but i am so so so grateful that you agreed to do this welcome everyone bobby's infamous ex girlfriend and wonderful person in general sarah highland thank you your middle name is rose right yes i remember i remember does it get old that people think sarah highland is that girl from modern modern family uh no i mean i the the best thing that ever happened like not a lot has happened for me for that but like the best thing that ever happened was i got um a like a a month's worth of colgate whitening strips from colgate i know but who sent it to you colgate meant for the others apparently sarah hyland actually i guess tweeted about how white her teeth were since using white strips so they sent it to sarah hyland probably thinking her and but it was to me wow so you just stole the other sarah hyland's white strips you heard it you heard that that's great that was like the best thing yeah that ever happened and then i went to like three weeks ago i went to get a cova test and of course you have all the everything on because i'm like 80 and she's like 12. and so like i have a mask on and like glasses and i said my name and they're like oh i love you on that show i was like yeah thank you thank you i mean yeah awesome and so that's the only thing that's ever happened i mean that's it but um i have to say about sarah um i have to say that is that your phone is that my phone it's not my phone you can pick it up if you want yeah pick it up turn it off oh it's my alarm news sorry i have no idea why my alarm went off yeah okay sarah and i dated uh for a couple of years yeah and she's a very funny comedian um i met her at the comedy store yeah she was performing in the belly room i remember that with on sunday nights for adam barnhart's show yes you remember that very well yeah yeah it was you who was always up there you uh maybe fortune was up there who was who else there's a couple of other people that people might know and uh i found her to be very funny and weird you know i mean like she's just a wee and then i i love weird yeah yeah really to respond to weird and um we had a lot of things in common right number one i don't know if you've told people but we were both sober at the time i'm still sober but i'm just saying yes you were sober and that was you were what i liked about you too was that you were hardcore sober yes you're i mean like you she was in it he enjoys it and um so that was like the the basis of the thing you know it's just i'm so difficult to date well i wanna i wanna dig these i wanna i have so many difficulties i have so many questions i've been waiting for this day for a long time yeah um so when you first saw bobby did you were you automatically attracted to him or were you like wait let me take a minute to see what i'm actually looking at no well i mean it was but like i i was sitting on the steps of and i didn't know who bobby was i didn't like watch tv like i didn't know anything nothing like i actually got to the co why are you looking at her beautiful garage so i so i was sitting on the steps of the comedy store in the belly room like on those like four little steps and i think i was like waiting to go up or something and then bobby came around the corner a little mohawk oh you had a mohawk yeah baby mohawk yeah he just said hello i was like hello hello yeah yeah like really and i just was like hello [Laughter] and it was kind of that like mutual that was your meet cute like hello weirdos yeah so and it kind of just worked and i think i don't know it just was one of those things probably same like it just kind of clicked of like kindred kindred yeah totally like because and then after that like the next thing i remember is we went to um the bar the place to eat next door with the mechanical [ __ ] oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah i went to saddle ranch and i had a bluetooth yeah that's right you had a wedge salad salad where it's literally a wedge [Laughter] with four bacon crumbles on it yeah so we we did that and then it was one of those things like we just that was it like we just started hanging out every day and i played the ask more questions it's okay bobby it's been so long it's been so long and did do you think that he fetishizes tall women oh my god i don't know i i have no idea i don't know i think i do i think he does they have to be taller sarah about five nine yeah see yeah because for me it's like when i was a kid i used to stare at my parents and they were both like mythological creatures and they were like so small when i first met your family by the way yeah you thought they were dwarves i honestly legitimately thought you guys were little people because my sister's six feet tall everyone in my family is really tall so when i met your brother when i met steve for the first time i was like oh my god come to me yeah yeah that's so cute yeah walk into it so whenever whenever i saw my parents i always think to myself i have to you know you have to i have to breed taller for my kids if i ever have them you know i mean so i just i've always dated if there was a i won't say her name but before you there was this girl in a.a really like six foot tall no she was five one oh god it's a wrong person and i remember kind of liking her but going she's just too small what yeah i mean i have to go higher go big i have to go bigger you know what i mean i like dangling i like dangling people yeah i like climbing i like you know i like being a backpack yeah i mean you know i like uh i'm like a koala and i want my woman to be the tree yeah so i like to hate you know just kind of i just like hanging you know i mean those aren't her tits by the way those are just i don't know what this is right here or i do this i do like the monkey thing where i just do this yeah and i just like hanging there for a bit you know it feels good so um i'll kind of tell you funny thing that one the first time i ever went to because she's from louisville kentucky yes remember that one time where we were in louisville and and we had a dinner or something and you i was in your a room or whatever and you go you have to wear this and it was like the super tight pokemon pokemon shirt [Laughter] yeah really tight it was like a extra small and i remember having a difficult time getting it on right i'm like why the [ __ ] do i have to wear this and she's like you'll see and then yeah and then we walked in i walked in and so her family is are very you know southern kind of white nice people that like great people i like them but um you know they had turned the whole dining room into it looked like a dojo like people were in kimonos right yes everybody got come on yeah everyone got kimonos right which is a very funny thing right i just remember sitting there i think they had chopsticks for me right everybody else get fork everyone else right imagine that right i mean a house in louisville kentucky right yeah and i just remember going this is cool you know i mean this is really funny you know and then um there's another thing that i was embarrassed about just because if i think about memories you know one time you gave me for a gift because you she loves going to thrift stores so one time you gave me a gift of a um it was a old photograph of a family or something like that right and she gave me that as a gift and i remember in front of your parents i gave you that same photograph as a gift background oh my god and then you said to me in front of your parents i gave you that well you re-gifted a gift she gave you back to her in front of her parents from her family yeah yeah that i i was at my when i lived above the comedy story what is wrong with you i i i still think about it going wow [ __ ] that one up why did you do that i don't know but it was so [ __ ] embarrassing i remember your dad blush i'm glad it didn't scar you that would have [ __ ] scarred me if a partner did that to me nothing penetrates it i really don't remember that but yeah i did i'd be like why yeah was i like what the [ __ ] yeah you were like it was it caught well it didn't cause a fight but i think it was weird for a day the next day was a little weird um that's amazing another but also another thing about our relationship was um she would disappear a little bit um i don't remember [Laughter] which was cool like in a weird way she would be like i'm just going to go off on my own for a couple weeks oh yeah yeah yeah and she would just kind of disappear for a couple of weeks yeah yeah that's necessary yeah yeah which is kind of but i didn't know where she went she never told me you know she did yeah yeah she would just no it's okay yeah she would just disappear and i think that you know at the end of the day game do you think that the destruction of our relationship was gaming did that have something wait i have questions i have questions where's my phone i can't prepare it okay sorry because not about you has everything to do with sarah okay she has the answers i see yeah she has answers i didn't do that there's so many you're not the first person to tell me that what that you disappeared just go away i don't know why you do that how many people in my past are like where did you go yeah i'm like where are you she was gone i just would i don't well i i would go to uh different states and stuff like i don't know why it's so weird now that you say it i'm like i did do that like i don't know i used to do that all the time yeah even when i was drinking a lot like people like people be drinking cheers and i go cheer bye and then i would just leave and for the rest of it they're paying taxi people to go look for me because i don't know where they go yeah i don't know why and it's so weird i just do that yeah not so much anymore yeah it's your it's your button how much sobriety do you have now oh my god eight like 18 and a half oh my god isn't that crazy you know it went out yeah do you hear that i did hear that yeah yeah yeah i have over a year now again it was scary she saw me she was there she would you know it's funny because i i did listen to uh a podcast um of this one and that's where that drawing came from by the way was the last podcast you did when you had your hair up oh yeah yeah yeah [Laughter] yeah no i i i gave you a tiara thank you thank you okay here are my questions for you sarah um it's not a sounds like a [ __ ] pageant but it's not my god okay here's here here who broke up with who and why um oh my god this is another one i just this somebody i was asked this as well and i swear god i try to remember of like why are we i already know what it was i already know the answer you do yeah i remember the night i remember the night i remember the night you said to me yeah you just basically said to me i'm just gonna move out you go i'll move out it's just not really working for me right now and we're good friends and i just don't i just don't think that this is right i remember i cried yeah yeah i cried because in my heart i knew it was done wait so you did get dumped you said you've never been dumped in your life and it turns out you lied it was more of a but here's it but that's the thing i will vouch for that for bobby because like that that is the weird thing is that it wasn't like this like it was just this odd because here's the thing bobby we had separate can yeah go ahead we had separate rooms like separate like bedrooms which is fun but i think i don't know like i just remember one night i was like i think we're more like roommates and like ooh that scares me yeah the roommate word has been mentioned in therapy between us yeah and that frightens me because he does he's a cat he just sort of like wants to not be touched wants to kind of like he he's afraid of being like truly vulnerable with people so it's almost like this chasing game yeah emotionally that you have to play with him and it's either like there are moments where he's really in it and other times where you're like am i just am i just a family member or someone you're living with so i that that really that's a trigger for me that the the r word is the trigger okay go ahead sarah we are roommates everyone in the house is a roommate we all no no i don't want to be your [ __ ] roommate we're not roommates in the technical sense like a college roommate okay right we're lovers right but we are roommates as well my parents were roommates okay but go ahead sarah oh my god all right so you guys were you felt like roommates it was over crazy okay second question oh okay because i always say and this might be completely um off course here i always view bobby he is a very like feminine energy to me yeah and um i always say like he's this is like my first like lesbian relationship yeah okay and did you view him do you view him similarly similarly as me where it's like i find him attractive in all the ways that i don't find a regular guy attractive hands down about you don't that's what i'm trying to tell you this is why oh my god this is why all right go ahead so g can i just let enough of the questions she has to answer this go ahead he's like a lady all right okay that's okay no no no no but that's the thing but that he i like it it's good let's just put it this way i understand what you're saying yeah and if you were to like if you would like go towards a color like it's it's almost he's a separate little he's a little entity of his yeah like i that i will say that bobby it's not bad it's not bad but it's definitely different from like being with a [ __ ] plumber from arkansas like you're different it's a good thing that's a good thing that that is a good thing that's a good rainbow you're like you're losing your next should we stop with the questions no no i want you to keep the questions okay i want to keep the questions going but um i just have to add that um with that explanation yes before i was a little defensive but with that explanation i would have to agree with that okay good go ahead with questions not that plumbers from arkansas are bad i just want no no they're not just they're not no you can't get cancelled for that sarah i'm not i'm trying to get cancer the guy that i dated last before him was this just big burly athlete yeah and i when i met him i was like why i couldn't explain why i was really attracted to him also i remember your friends and family were going what the [ __ ] my my family wasn't like that they weren't there was only one friend that did that yeah who was that and she was my ugliest friend yeah yeah so she i think she was just projecting oh okay i don't think that it came from anywhere beyond her own insecurities about herself um okay um what did you guys fight most about i don't remember fighting with you we don't fight no fighting right because i think the v was the video game is a problem here can i say this though yeah can i say something yeah like yes but i i was also here's the thing it was two bobbies like i that's the other thing too like we were so similar like he would play video games but i i'd be like bye he like i wouldn't and it takes somebody like you to be in a relationship with bobby to kind of show up in that way to be like hey like i don't want to be roommates yeah but numdum like me like was just kind of i just kind of rotated around it like it was i did the same thing but in my own way i kind of wish i had more of that more like easy going kind of like feelings about it because like i look at him i'm like [ __ ] you gotta get up like move your toes or something because that's all he does it's like he'll sit for 16. did i did i sleep in a lot back then bobby yes you well at the time at the other i don't know if you still have them but you had the blackout window he still did yeah yeah that's right yeah yeah well yeah you would i mean you would sleep till like six yeah p.m yeah yeah p.m okay okay nothing has changed nothing has changed nothing has changed yeah so i mean that's i mean so i could sit here and like yeah i mean you play video games uh do you still eat bags of sunflower seeds yes every week i have to empty out just jars and jars of seeds yeah sunflower did you have a glue thing back then yes you glue your hand have you you have not changed at all look so much a lot of growing over here look at all that look at all that glue yes oh there it yeah art is did he have did he have fungus feet back then i don't know i don't think he did no no because after her is when i really started hitting the um spas did i go to spas back then yeah yeah all the time you remember you had that big white head is it remember oh yeah yeah they hit the spot for like three days oh yeah yeah yeah yeah and then you [Laughter] for years he's using this [ __ ] same um pimple ointment from the 80s he doesn't think he doesn't think there are new ones that have been developed that work better yeah so we were at the desert over the weekend he was like i can't go to sleep this pimple hurts too much i was like here have some of this yeah and she wouldn't i thought that was resistant he was like no only this one works i was like uh yeah yeah only person gel that's a [ __ ] yeah yeah from [ __ ] rite aid yeah i mean and then she goes she gives me this expensive i i blotted it on it was just gone it was just amazing do you have new stuff yeah what's it called let's promote it oh it's called um circumference that's the conference really good stack yeah yeah this is my new thing uh all right so you have any more questions um hang on do i do i do i i think i do did i watch porn back then so much was it on um dvds at that time yeah uh maybe yeah yeah maybe because he would it was so weird because like for as messy as he is like he had his porn collection really like categorized in fetuses in fact like he had said you're it was like full on that like you tried to stop like you were gonna you and uh your what was his name harley charlie what is nothing jake yeah crazy charlie yeah they were gonna stop masturbating you remember everybody knows yeah what the [ __ ] yeah we're just gonna stop masturbating and going to like pornhubs and i don't know what they're but you were gonna stop watching porn yeah yeah and remember and that's we talked about on your show that's when you got your red tattoo because you had to go do something that's right remember that that was like day negative one that you guys stopped doing that's right we got tattoos yeah hey guys we're going to take a really quick break to share some of our favorite sponsors with you [Music] [Applause] if you sell stuff online you're definitely in the right business you guys you guys um ship station we love because we use it here in our own private um business um without it we wouldn't be able to get stuff out to you people and we really love this company a lot more people are shopping online more than ever 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businesses can now access the same rates usually reserved for fortune 500 without the contracts or commitments it's no wondership station has more five-star reviews than any other shipping software bring it in gil ship more in less time just use our offer code belly to get a day free trial that's two months free of no hassle stress free shipping just go to shipstation.com click on the microphone at the top of the page and type in belly.shipstation.com enter the offer code belly make ship happen enjoy the rest of the show how have you been at the pandemic has it been freaking you out i've been okay i mean i mean which part freaking me out i mean because i have to say this and i want to say this out loud and to the public um you're sort of an enigma to me because i i really have always found you to be up there especially with like in terms of comedy being gifted and being like just so intrinsically funny and and you know um you know i want the world for you thank you yeah and and so you know um i know that during the pandemic it's everything stopped for people so that's why i'm asking the question in terms of comedy has it been painful no okay because you've been doing because you've been doing your videos and whatnot yeah i mean that but that's the other thing that you know i think i don't get i don't really perseverant on one thing like if something stops i'm not like like i you just pivot and do something else like yeah for me like i've always i mean i love i like stand up but i like i can create just the same [ __ ] in my own house like yeah yeah whether if it's doing like characters or like painting i've been doing a lot of that but i think i don't know i i don't i don't get stuck on one thing which might be a part of like the commitment thing for me but i've always pretty much been able to like you know go get another hobby yeah yeah plants because i remember you did a lot of planting planting but you also like you know the level that she's at she she went to new york to audition for snl yeah and love it set that up right john lovetts yeah so she really is just and she did how many episodes of mad tv did we get you on a couple like three or four yeah that was fun too yeah yeah i remember we did that one with mincy and the plane you remember that yes yeah yeah yeah didn't you do one where you played like not a cheerleader but like a hot chick the [Music] um no we it i can't remember her name it was another comic and i can't remember her name but she was so sweet and uh we were football fans and you were a tank oh that's right i was tanked that's right i remember that the hottest it got was like tight jeans like that [Laughter] like i've never caught but yeah yeah in a jersey that was fun that was fun yeah that was a good time yeah you know i was young how old were you when you moved to l.a um i got sober like 23 20 23. and you just wanted you had like you wanted to do comedy and that was like the plan that you had no i had no plan i wish i had a friend no i was a [ __ ] up no like that no i wish that there was like i was like yes i had no plan like i that i mean i've grown a lot in a lot of ways like the fact that i am married is so beyond like i am not i never want to get married like i don't have that in my like thing yeah my wheelhouse i have a real problem i'm not a future thinker i kind of really respect that though right now but that's all that matters right it's like it's good but it doesn't it's not great for plan plan yeah for success yeah it's great in a lot of ways but it's definitely like it's definitely like i am never i've never been somebody who's like you know my four-year plan mm-hmm and i think successful people i think do have that yeah successful but like how happy happy how happy i don't know i don't know many of those people yeah the whole like where do you see yourself in five or ten years that question is so [ __ ] i that pisses me i can't stand it but i guess you should i mean you should have like something but it's but again it's just never been that's never been my personality so like when i came to l.a like i i didn't have a plan like i just i moved to los angeles because chicago where i was living was so cold yeah yeah so geographically there was i remember this i don't know why west hollywood okay so when i was little being born in louisville you always wanted for the most part not always but i myself wanted to get out of removal from day one and i remember seeing a postcard and it was two people in a red convertible sweater i don't know where i saw it but i was on a red because they were on a red convertible and this this girl had blonde hair and i was like i have long hair i was like that must be me and so she her hair was like in the wind and the guy was driving with his hair flying and they were going over the hill and it said hollywood it had a sun and the sky was purple yeah and i was like i want to live there and so somewhere in my psyche i was like that's where the sunshine is so i just literally drove but when you were in chicago you didn't you did second city and stuff like that i did yeah well i originally went there to go to the art institute then you quit because i wasn't the best yeah yeah yeah because he's from second city as well are you i'm from wrigleyville oh my god right on how long do you live in chicago five years yeah it's good it's a good yeah it's cold as [ __ ] though it's cold as [ __ ] yeah like but it's one of the best cities ever oh yeah it's amazing but like literally in school we would have to figure out map plans to go through like buildings because it was so [ __ ] cool like it was so inhumane i just want to pull this up this is oh yes if you want to put your headphones you can hear some of it this is why uh i wasn't a hot girl i was just wait a [ __ ] man i would be look at the outfit mama the low rise what do you say we play a game of six hand tucks i'll be shirts and you can be skilled yes okay if the saints win the super bowl i'll sleep with you but if the titans win the super bowl we'll both sleep with you sweet well they're not in the super bowl or something i mean i don't why you're laughing yeah sorry we're not in your fantasy football my brother's in that right where'd your parents go steve is in that room a lot of tanks my brother's in the trunk why you're people really still enjoy it yeah i realized how young i was right i look much different now you know and um can i say this almost has a million no how annoying is that you actually don't i'm like not really bobby you think i look the same yes oh that's nice yeah a little trouble but you think i've gained weight i've gained weight i don't think i don't think so i don't know i've always seen you as one [Laughter] you want to say dumpling no no no no yeah yeah so but um how long you been married now uh what's the anniversary i know i think three years yeah but you were dating her for a while right like after you broke up with me i've had so many okay yes please so you dated so after you broke up with me how many people did you date until your life god that's no it's okay it out if you don't want to answer it i don't mind it like if there's anything i could share to hopefully help somebody it would be my relationships and the downfall of every one of them um no i mean to be honest when we broke up i went to sweden did you really yes i don't even know why that's what i'm saying yeah yeah like you know what i always like when we when we go through hard times i think of sweden too i always imagine like where's the coldest kind of like weird party place i can go to to kind of get away but i always think if anything happens i i'm out this [ __ ] like i'm doing what sarah does i'm going to sweden uh i read enough girl with a dragon tattoo to know parts of sweden pretty well is it because you want to just be around nordic play people because i'm so eastern i think it's like good reason i'm going to go where asians don't exist i mean growing up did you let me because i've always liked to i always like to ask um growing up did you ever find did you find asian people attractive because what what i like about sarah is you could tell that there was no like prejudice yeah you know i mean which is cool when you see you know a chick that grew up in the south right and you can just sense that there is no you know i mean she's not putting you in any kind of like box or whatever and so you know i'm sure did you ever like grow up and go oh i think asians are cute or i'm attracted to them um it was so like the opposite i think bro like no i'm in like i am intrigued and like fascinated like be like to a kind of odd point of people who are not like me who do not look like me and growing up in the south primarily it is all white people yeah primarily like i like what the i went to a religious school like where i it's just that it is what it was they look like him yes yes yeah yeah and so but and i but even at a young age i was like i was fascinated because we would have history books and clearly in the history books there's an eskimo and i'm like where are they i was so like where are these people yeah yeah because we had like you know like one of each authenticity that you know you're like how did you make it here and like in every single time like i remember we i think there was a a girl she was filipino who i grew who i went to grade school with one yeah i just remember feel like i had this thing in my like heart that i was like are you okay let me know how are you feeling she wasn't okay oh probably not and like i just kind of like knew that like i so i i so it's i that's a thing so as soon as like i know like as soon as i was 18 i was like i gotta go i gotta find the others like i just wanted to find the eskimos yeah yeah so like that's why i moved to chicago because i was like there's gotta be like out there yeah yeah and i kind of so that's that's a thing like i'm just so like i it's with so much i don't know i've just always been intrigued by other cultures authenticities like everything about other cultures is that how you felt george is that why you moved to india like right out of high school where you're like i gotta see more yeah yeah i like white people like you you guys are the ones that honestly you guys are the ones that like protest with the black people back in the 60s during the protest you know i mean and they put their bodies on the line and we needed people like you you too and i want to say uh from the bottom of my heart thank you thank you guys yeah thank you so much thank you they're good you guys are good thank you for the protest but what i found though was that you know that she was a very nice lady but did you lady did your grandmother was she weirded out that that you were dating an asian guy or oh my mom's mom yeah yeah yeah rita rita little rita i remember one time rita was in the house and i remember going i should just go play piano because there was a piano there right so i'm going to play the piano just say maybe that's my angle in yeah did it work i i don't remember ever happening sarah with rita and because rita's forgotten rita that's did she like you yeah did rila like me yeah i don't think rita is like me yes rita was like hardcore she's like a hardcore country you know like i would always i would call her princess because she was so hard and like so grumpy yeah i would always say i love you just to see like i love you so and i say princess i love you she would just say the same like she couldn't say it back so yeah i was like that's not that's not i love you like so she i don't know if she liked me but i'm pretty sure in her heart she loved you too but you knew who i did love is your parents they're good i want to get out i don't want to get emotional but they're good they love you because i have a i still have we have all your this is going to sound we have a photo but we have all of your photos that's sweet and uh i have a photo of your father yeah right yeah dressed up as elvis yes right yes and it's from um way back in the day that's right timmy yeah timmy right yeah and whenever i was hanging still when we lived in the old place yeah um because we were dating you know i mean at the beechwood house because yeah you lived there as well yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah so i i was hanging there and i still have it i'm gonna hang it up i love your parents your parents were just like not your dad was um just a great he's just a great guy and i know he's also you know a role model when it comes to like sobriety and stuff like that yeah yeah and he's just uh do they miss do they remember me oh they remember you so much oh no that they love bobby that that's but you're everybody loves you you're happy and the one time that we did the family play remember i played my grandma oh that's right that's right yeah you were the uh dry cleaning man you remember that family play yeah so bobby was it okay okay all right so there we came home for christmas yeah and my family is all like they're like irish cat big people like huge massive yeah white and like bobby did this play we put on a family plane in a living room yeah yeah yeah yeah so but anyway bobby played i can't like it's a the whole storyline of it was kind of interesting but basically yeah bobby slim bobby was like the other man just go ahead go ahead do you remember this no i thought they'll tell you i don't want to tell you all right fine if it's listen tell the story i can't if you want it edit it out we'll edit it out but i can't tell it because it's it's racial i get it i know you just told me i know sarah sarah let me just say this okay it's good our culture has changed okay right so much and we've changed culture has changed so much right now this is back way back in the day this is like so long how long ago 12 years ago how long ago let's just say 30 even let's 30 years ago yeah and you were a willing participant it was all in funny listen listen he killed it though i killed him he killed it why don't you explain what what it was about and we'll listen to it and if you don't want it we'll cut it out we cut all right so go ahead okay nobody didn't even get canceled that's why i can judge all three of my followers on instagram go go go ahead i'm gonna lose my blue checkmark i have i have nothing to lose man um i mean i do but i don't all right [ __ ] so the story basically i'm sorry in advance my family has good heart and good spirit i swear all right i hate this okay so all right brody so basically so growing up house is so horrible i hate this let's get dive in okay yeah yeah well you don't even remember what it's about so i'm on this i think i want you to i want to hear it because i maybe it'll rekindle a memory okay uh you're going to have to cancel this out if it's really bad i'll be on it i think it might be better if you don't even put it on yeah so all right so growing up okay so in my family you know all families have a physical characteristic that makes them the like if they looked at you have something okay okay the lease like you have something in your family like and oh your arms are very lee like yeah yeah yeah oh look he looks like his uncle right yeah that's why yeah so in my family highlands we all have um very like almond eyes okay i hate that i hate this we're good all right so they have like almond shaped eyes it's actually not that bad i'm set myself up worse than it really is all right so anyway but it's but okay so if you come from a land of white people yeah it's pretty everybody looks kind of the same yeah yeah so if you have any characteristics that's that that's specific then okay so that's why so they all have this kind of this kind of almond eye shape and so um so my grandpa willie and my grandma rosemary okay everybody wondered where how all this there's seven kids there's six boys and one girl and so they always wondered how cause nobody in my family has this almond shape like they don't have it yeah and so it was always this thing of like who's rosemary sleeping with so yeah so the whole thing of this joke and so they're i guess at the time that they were growing up like i guess there was a dry-cleaning gentleman of asian descent yeah it's not bad it's not bad rosemary they said rosemary must be sleeping with the dry cleaner so the play was so this had never been physically theatricized you know just as verbal words which was fine by me but my dad being a thespian he was yes he put wrote this play for our family during christmas wrote it during christmas time yeah so i played rosemary i put on a wig remember yeah yeah and we made all those babies remember yes and so my cousin wesley played grandpa willie and then my cousin wendy narrated the [ __ ] thing yeah and so i'm sitting there and i made during this whole christmas time i made these all these babies i made seven babies i made them out of b do you remember shopping for those babies i remember that like one of them has big ears and holding a beer can yeah yeah uncle mark and my dad had like lumps because he got pulled out with the bice what are they called tricep but you know four seconds yeah thank you and so we made all these babies and so then at the end of the play it was this whole thing of like oh but still how did everybody get these almond-shaped eyes and then i'm sitting there and i'm smoking and all of a sudden bobby pops out from the seat and go surprise something like that it was a better build up my it was horrible because it's tainted with shame but like good and here you go surprise and yes you saw the mohawk and it smelled yeah and and then this just if you can imagine like a whole [ __ ] it crushed crush it killed it crushed in the family crushed [ __ ] and just everybody [ __ ] died laughing first of all that story is we're not cutting down do you not remember that i do remember it vaguely i remember getting trying to go to thrift stores and getting the babies i think i remember i think i remember i don't remember the the lines surprisingly i don't remember that perfect just like that i don't remember that but um yeah yeah yeah and i remember but you know i remember crushing maybe either me but um i also have fond memories of there was a coffee shop near your house in louisville okay right i remember walking there can you walk there from your house i don't know yeah i remember going there was a really nice coffee shop but i also remember that was the first time i went horseback riding yes with your family oh i have a story about this yeah so we went to hawaii we were in kauai and i had never i had like no horse experience whatsoever i didn't grow up riding horses didn't grow up around them at all but this guy goes we should go horseback riding he's like i'm a horseman he's like i used to go he's like i used to go with sarah to her hometown in louisville and just ride horses all day for like months so he really made it out like he was some [ __ ] cowboy right sarah he couldn't even mount the horse he couldn't even swing his tiny little legs over a short horse and i and this horse nearly trampled him to death like it was the funniest thing and then he the amount of times you know you almost got like bucked off because the horse just [ __ ] hated you yeah i was like this guy's a [ __ ] liar you didn't go riding horses with sarah she probably rode horses i rode the horses i rode a horse was that your first time though [Laughter] what story go ahead okay what story what story i went horseback riding with the family so aggressive no i didn't say he did ride horses when we first went there okay so there's something about horses if you don't know so there's like normal sized horses for norm no like you know like yeah 15 hands yeah like big horses but there's also ponies called shetland punk i know sheldon's pennies so uh-huh cute little where we went to rut he did he did go to ride he we did he we went to oldham county yeah and you rode at debbie's farm in debbie's farm and so we went to go get the horse did you write a shetland poem tell the story right go ahead what happened this wedding what is it so no so we went we're walking towards the barn we're walking towards the barn yeah debbie goes let me go get the horses for everybody my mom so jeffy she brings out one horse normal horse yeah two horse normal horses three horses [Laughter] who was this baby shelling coming when's coming it was that baby [Laughter] that's what it looked that's what it like like they used to do tricks like that all the time and they used to laugh and laugh and laugh and they laughed oh god i remember that that was your horse riding no i didn't actually got a regular one after after that yeah that was a joke debbie brings out the [ __ ] the pony and then there's a 10-minute 15-minute laugh killed it again right and i'm like i'm mugging you i mean surprised right and then i get on a regular horse but yeah i do remember that yeah yeah and then and then we [Laughter] thank you black and white um so yeah we were riding so in oldham county and so the surrounding counties of kentucky are all like rural woodsy [ __ ] yeah so we're riding through the woods and every other treat [Laughter] i remember also they wrote an article about us they did in the in the newspaper my parents have it and i hope this isn't i mean it's all like it's been girl it's been here but they still have that framed it's down in our basement we i still have a picture of the both of you framed yeah up on our wall yeah and i know that sounds really weird but i really have like you know when i first met bobby one of the things that i was so scared of finding out about him was that his exes were i mean that's all women are wonderful i'm just saying like it would have been a red flag for me if his ex wasn't you like when he told me about you when he says this is sarah she's a comedian she's funny she's this it i was impressed and that was one of the reasons why um i felt comfortable knowing that okay like he likes these brilliant women like that's that's what his past looks like if it had been some you know just hot chick with no substance it would have been a red flag for me so like i have absolutely no feelings about that like at all so yeah i have to i like hearing these stories because it's like intel for me yeah it really is i'm like holy [ __ ] tell me more yeah i'll tell you everything i have to say though that you know if i look back in my life i if i wrote a book and i had chapters in terms of my relationships there were probably three real relationships i had you know i mean i think sarah was a real relationship i think christine was a real relationship and you obviously you know um but um yeah you know i've i i think i you know there needs to be something specific that i can so if number one for a girlfriend i have to introduce them to my parents yeah my parents have to really like them so you know i um that's number one number two there's got to be you know looks is one thing right but there's got to be some like a bunch of other things that that triggers stuff within me but um you always tell me this one story about when you were with sarah in hawaii and like the angriest you've ever been is i don't know if you remember okay there's two hawaiian stories with you okay remember that one time where i had food poisoning yeah that was i ate a hot dog at the ground waialae hotel and then we're at the airport we missed the flight and had diarrhea for 24 hours and she i remember having her to carry me around to the airport i don't remember that okay the second thing is you probably won't remember this either i was holding hands with you we were on the beach and a group of guys walked by and i remember and they accused me of like you know paying you to be with me or something my thing and then me being angry you know i mean wanting to confront them and you remember you just kind of you know pulling me along let's not bother with that you know those guys you know but um i remember those just you don't remember the diarrhea huh i don't know i feel like your tummy always hurt like i know i would you know why would that diary stand up it's so true nothing has changed like he oh something's always up with his guts you have ibs i think i think i do because you tell her how many times i've [ __ ] my pants oh my god we were just in the desert and he [ __ ] his pants and he had to wear my underwear all weekend yeah yeah my cute little panties my lace panties all week yeah yeah hey guys we're gonna take another quick break to share one of our personal favorite sponsors name what what interferes with your happiness oh my god so many things but you know what i've dealt with a baby do you know why why i use better health baby so do i yeah yeah you know doing this pandemic baby better hub has really um i've dealt with a lot of issues with my trauma with other things that are going on and if this is one of my favorite um services in the whole wide world betterhelp is an app that will assess your needs and match you with your own licensed professional therapist it connects you in a safe and private online environment and it's so convenient guys you can start communicating in under 48 hours you can send a message to your counselor anytime this is one of my favorite features about it you'll get timely and thoughtful responses plus you can schedule weekly video or phone sessions it's not a crisis line it's not self-help what it is is this professional counseling done securely online yeah and you have licensed professional counselors who are specialized in depression stress anxiety relationships sleeping trauma anger family conflicts lgbtq matters grief or self-esteem and anger anything you share by the way is confidential it's convenient it's professional it's affordable and financial aid is available also can i may i interrupt check out the testimonials posted daily on their site please tell them bring it in if you want to start living your happier life today as a listener you'll get 10 off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com belly join over 1 million people who have taken charge of their mental health again that's betterhelphelp.com belly enjoy the rest of the show this has been great we've already done we always do an hour all right but um sarah thank you so much by the way we have to do and tell me when you need to stop i know you guys no we we're not done we have another section that we're going to do with you but okay no i i want to say to your beautiful girl thank you because i i honestly because that was the same thing like i never i only knew of you from social media and just from the podcast and um and i had no idea about like your feelings or personality but i swear but as soon as she messaged me i was like i love her you are so kind so i appreciate like i think i told bobby a long time ago we would watch your kentucky lightning videos together yeah yeah like in bed i think you're [ __ ] hilarious you're so funny and talented thank you and um i am just so grateful that you agreed to do this really yeah get to it well at the end of our i have to explain to what it is at the end of our episodes we do a unhelpful advice people email us questions and we can either be helpful or not okay okay so go ahead helpful advice with sarah hyland hey guys my dad is a higher up at a company he consistently talked about how happy he'd beef i worked with him in december he offered me a job in it department i took him up on the job because i knew how pleased he would be if i started working with them i hated it i dreaded going to work every day because it was very boring job and i didn't have any opportunities to talk to people i am his oldest child of 17 with this job i was working two jobs at once this led me to slipping back into depression and feeling like i couldn't hang out with my friends or enjoy free time i just put my two weeks notice in and he is very disappointed he looks at me like a quitter now he was very proud of his son working with him but now i feel like he tries to avoid conversation with me do you have any advice on how to lighten up the situation with my dad well hmm i mean i feel like those conflicts are common you know i mean for me just for my own personal life i just have to be able to look forward to work because i'm so lazy and i'm just so i'm so stagnant that like for me to do anything it's just i have to enjoy it i have to look forward to it and i have to like get excited about what i'm doing it's like you know i have some jobs coming up in may that thing i have to do in may and um i'm just i'm constantly thinking about it you know i'm going to hungary in may yeah and i'm thinking about it and i'm like you know i mean there's a lot of like fear but there's a lot of excitement and all that and i all those things have to be involved if i had a daily job where i i was not i hated it i just wouldn't be able to do it and i just sounds like that's the position that you're in brother yeah um there i think there are types of people that just aren't meant for the corporate world i know i'm one of them like i could never clock in clock out be a nine to five and i had the exact sort of similar thing where you know like being filipino just by virtue of being filipino like my mom really just wanted to push the nursing thing my sister took the bait my other sister took the bait they're both nurses she still tries to push that you know you could still you could still and you just got to put your foot down and say like i respect you i love you this just isn't my path in life and um please allow me to find that whatever that is please allow me to find it on my own sarah i did that once i yeah i mean i agree like i tried to work for my dad at his insurance company imagine her oh my god no i would take naps like he would tell me to go file yeah so many learning disabilities that like a b c d e like i would have to do the alphabet so many times to remember where the w and x were oh so sleepy so i would take naps his actual employees would find me like sarah's taking a nap yeah you know i mean i tried it several times and my brother works for him in the insurance company um i think just keep just keep doing what you want to do and what you love to do and eventually like i have the worst arrested development ever like it's taken me a long time like i wasn't somebody who like right out of high school was like i want to be a lawyer like don't do it like it just takes what it takes and i think you know i don't just continue doing what you do and being enthusiastic and passionate about it so that your parents can't argue with it yeah even if you that's good yeah take naps or don't because they don't want you to take naps at the filing cabinet that that's not helpful so that that's been for me like i just keep being you know but don't be lazy don't be lazy because if people watch you being lazy they don't it's hard to support it yeah that's a good point yeah you have to be doing something yeah yeah to further your situation but um anything else is it another one yeah uh hello i'm aldo i'm 31 years old i was with my girlfriend for about eight years and we have a seven-year-old son recently i lost it because of the pandemic and told her to get her things and go back home after she came home at 3am about two weeks ago i immediately regretted what i'd done and said i miss her so much and now she wants to go out with others and i feel so lost there's always been trust issues with us i just don't know any way in getting my family back together i'm trying to work on not contacting her but as soon as i miss her i get an overwhelming depressive feeling to talk to her basically he lashed out on his wife and he came off three in the morning from what a partying he doesn't know trust issues yeah [Music] anyways thank you for listening so sarah do you have um anything you want to plug like uh your social media and whatnot go ahead that's another part of this i was like i don't have anything to plug but you have your social media i have social media do you sell art do something i do no i'm joking i'm kidding i'm kidding um no i i that's a thing since the pandemic and stuff because i did two zoom shows and killed myself that's sad i had depressions like i hated it yeah i haven't done anything i cannot do it what are they like i mean because you don't you're not getting rid of the response from the people that's the thing like i don't know how comedy i i swear i don't know how comics do it i don't because like everything about comedy is even right now is like you're talking to people like if it's not a [ __ ] podcast you're sitting there talking that's a vlog yeah not a show right right right so i don't know so that's i don't know i know comedians are doing it i don't know but that's the thing so anyway so i've been doing more art i do like paintings and stuff for now until it kind of like clears but i just do that like and interestingly enough like you kind of go to where what makes you money yeah yeah and people are buying them so i just kind of like do that and see where it goes are you going to get vaccinated yes yes for sure okay good yeah i think i can do it because i have as asthma you do you tell me yo my wheeze did you have asthma when i was dating you yes i had in my heart i remember oh my god no you don't i don't remember your explosive diarrhea one for one it's okay anyway that was a real fun show that was a really fun show oh yeah that was really good and um um don't go anywhere cause we take a photo okay and um we'll see you back on the program can i say that i love your girl okay that's already been said so what yeah i think it's important give her a round of applause thank you so much i love you i was also very nervous i was so i was pretty you killed it you feel so sweet that was so fun you killed it thanks guys what an exciting episode so we want to thank our sponsor shipstationbetterhealth [ __ ] more or less time just use the offer code belly to get a 60 day free trial of shipstation.com click on the microphone at the top of the page and type in belly hey start living your happier life today get 10 off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com belly join over one million people who have taken charge of their mental health again that's betterhelphelp.com belly and george if we want to uh send in a question where can we do that send it to advice on helpful at gmail.com we are have we gotten any other video submissions we need more guys we need you to submit the videos uh priority to video submissions there yeah so make sure you put that in the subject line and make sure you keep the videos under 90 seconds if possible uh anything else george nah i just that was a i loved that episode i don't know that was great i really enjoyed no i can turn up though yeah i know that i know like it's easy to play like the cool girl and be like oh like i'm cool with my partner's ex but i genuinely feel like every time bobby has ever talked about her or talked about how funny she was i always always knew that i wanted to meet her eventually just because it's like she is hate to say it's so much like him it's scary they are so similar and um i don't know like i get him so i get her yeah do you know what i mean and like i like listening i like hearing stories about bobby through someone else's experience with him especially in like the capacity that she would wish his [ __ ] girlfriend for a while you know and i like hearing stories about a younger bobby which kind of sounds like the same the same exact person i'm dealing with today really but when i messaged her you know i was like oh [ __ ] like what if she what if she says no um but she was like yeah yeah i'm in that's awesome i was like oh thank god and i'm glad she didn't think i was like being like a creep or anything like that you know because it's easy to be like what's in it for her like what's your agenda you know i bet you did leave here being like why does kyle have so many photos of me and bobby up in here dude this is so creepy but we have a picture of her like as a child like framed upstairs and then i remember you remember that picture i remember i was thinking like i i always said like bobby who's that and he was like oh that's young sarah but it's such a cute picture i'm like oh okay good enough for me because i thought you and two had met before like that's uh me too i thought you guys have met no no no no we've only ever um dm on instagram and stuff and i follow her because i genuinely think she's [ __ ] hilarious and super super talented and um yeah she reminds me of like maybe a more refined version of bobby so that makes sense did you guys see that like there's like similarities yeah the weird thing there's much you see there's some like the weirdness i see the weirdness but i don't think that's like they're i'm talking about their brand of funny yeah yeah brand of funny is the same yeah like it's it's kind of like yeah it's like unique yeah oh my god appreciate that he's back to playing video games oh my god uh kalila is there any shout outs to any like uh dogs that need to be adopted i think all the dogs i fostered are currently um adopted good thank god or one is in a trial process so fingers crossed i hope that works out um but um yeah i have nothing else to add to this date guys but if i want to watch another podcast where can i do that oh that's right thanks for reminding me i'm really bad someone wrote me and said could you sound more enthusiastic about other projects you're working on like you sound like a [ __ ] like person asleep i'm like okay no noted noted so you guys if you haven't already i i am on a separate podcast with my friends annie letterman and esther pavitsky it's called bloodbath it's out every tuesday it's on youtube and all other platforms you listen to podcasts please subscribe go to itunes someone's phone is ringing give us five stars um i feel like i'm a different version of myself around them um because i don't know they're just feminine energy different energy and also their girls they're my friends they're my girlfriends so um please do that if you haven't already and i appreciate jazz and i'll see you next week if it's a really fun show and if you don't get in now you're really missing out guys i mean it's it's only going to get better i couldn't be more well it's already great and it's the top launch of this year top launch of uh 2021 so if basically yeah you're missing out if you aren't there already thank you george and george is behind um is behind is my behind the scenes guy i wouldn't have i won't do anything without you by the way george you're like my my safety blanket because if it's like oh do you guys want to start a podcast can george be my producer because if george's not my producer i won't do it so hey guys go congrats to you rich guy [Laughter] yeah you re you elitist all right guys make sure you follow that elitist the richest one in the room hello follow george underscore this guy three dollars good friends me and george took a road trip and every time i wanted to pay for food he said i got it i'm sure you got it i was like it's four tacos i could do i got i remember like because you guys ordered um you guys ordered the pizza i was like i wonder if i should reimburse him i'm like nah not gonna this guy it's a work weekend we got a lot of shows that's enough yeah audience doesn't even know that's uh coming out uh the top secret but coming out soon uh we did a weekend uh a weekend project yeah so uh to many more of those maybe internationally this year we'll see i'd love to go to italy and just do one podcast think about that we just showed up one day one day wait i want to talk to you guys about this since bobby will be gone for as long as he's gonna be gone yeah in budapest um are we able to join him at all are the restrictions still pretty i need to look that up but also i'm on special restrictions since i'll have a baby oh yeah that's right you're you're on um paternity leave i'm not as excited about doing research for other people's trips i could but just found out today my passport i need to update that how fast can i do that two weeks oh god 24 hours why did someone scare me by seven months well because that's if you don't uh you don't do the fast one no you could just go to any service like passport um walgreens no no not walgreens there's a fat there they're agencies all over los angeles and you can get them one time we got bobby a passport in 24 hours wow check out that they'll even courier it to you at the airport while you're waiting for your flight this is not a sponsor there's no she knows everything about this i swear to you because this is one of the biggest stress one of the most stressful times of my life was when bobby needed a passport he failed to tell me his [ __ ] had expired oh no one time though he just it didn't expire he just lost it i ransacked the whole [ __ ] house i was crying to my mom like how much longer do i have to do this and finally i found a place and they literally ran it to him at the airport that's pretty cool oh man i uh yeah there was one time bryce came out before he lived out here we were going to go down to tijuana like baja california yeah i actually got insurance on my car we drove all the way down we got to san diego before i looked at my passport and saw that like it expired like a month earlier well you know like back in the day um they didn't used to require a passport if you just had the california id because i used to go back and forth to mexico a lot and i would only i would never show my passport it was after 9 11. so that was oh for sure yeah that's a different time even canada required after that right i did once with the bike uh a driver's license they're like don't do this again man i miss airports for 911. family go with you you cry at the uh terminal oh yeah now you have to cry before security i know remember when you like get to actually say bye in the terminal yeah i missed that with that song guys that's our sign up keep singing follow kalala george george bobby at gale bits bubbly live and i killed this we love you guys so much follow kalos spotify playlist all right [Music] guys [Music] you

Channel: TigerBelly

Views: 691,181

Rating: 4.8694086 out of 5

Keywords: tiger belly, tigerbelly, bobby lee, podcast, khalyla, tgrbly, all things comedy, mad tv, stand up, tpw, tkats, tfatk, bad friends, comedy podcast, Bobby lee andrew santino, tigerbelly clips, bobby lee podcast, sarah hyland comedian, sarah hyland, relationship advice, reletionship adv, bloodbath podcast, esther povitsky, annie lederman, ex girlfriend mod fnf, ex g, whisky ginger, boyfriend, break up, bad friends podcast, khalyla kuhn, gilbert galon, off the record, comedy

Id: 6ORIL222i-Q

Length: 74min 33sec (4473 seconds)

Published: Thu Apr 01 2021

Reddit Comments

[u/Finster137]

I became a fan when she said, “he’s like a lady”. So funny.

[u/Mindful-O-Melancholy]

She sounds like Tom, Bert and Rudy doing white girl impressions on the last Bad Friends.

[u/Barista4695]

With peace and love this chick is a strange fucking bird

[u/Spongekelp]

playing video games, sleeping till 6pm, bags of sunflower seeds, gluing his hands, korean spas. king of consistency.

[u/ApocalypticS0UL]

Lol Bobby totally has a type

[u/mediciii]

I’m definitely/probably in the minority but I think her voice is amazing and interesting asf to listen to lol. Definitely jarring at the start though hahaha

[u/freedomboobs]

She seems very different from this video with Bobby 8 years ago:

https://youtu.be/WV-sWVsR-JQ

[u/mitchcoob]

Amazing episode, somewhat of a full circle trip for OG Papayas. This was a fun one.

[u/koinoyokan89]

If the podcast is any valuable indication, she has better chemistry with him.