6 Bizarre Implications Of The Gremlins Films - Obsessive Pop Culture Disorder

Oh internet my name is Jane Oh brah yeah a guy and welcome to another corny yet mesmerizing episode of obsessive pop-culture disorder the only show on the earth we're going to try out the various accents I've been working on today's New Zealand episode wick through dope Greenland I love grammar but I have some issues and now I'm going to talk about them you've seen the show gremlins is a timeless Christmas movie about a small town that is overrun by gremlins mischievous and surprisingly adaptive and intelligent monsters but no one seems to be bothered by that's actually my first point in the beginning of the movie our protagonists dad comes in contact with a Mogwai a new type of harried gobbler doesn't say what the is that which is what I or you would say he says oh I've been looking everywhere for something like that for my son for Christmas it's a present for my son for Christmas it's exactly what I've been looking for and I've been everywhere which first of all hey now you weren't looking for this your son is a lonely bank employee with a broken car who lives at home he doesn't need another pet and you haven't been looking for a new creature you didn't even know existed until just now take a bow this is a singing monster who can occasionally imitate human words and it's just like this fits with the reality I've accepted can i buy this thinking singing monster of indeterminate origin for $200 that's $200 he eventually presents it to his son our hero Billy who was like cool on this thing no one is concerned that this is a species that doesn't exist in any book anywhere it's so commonplace that when Billy shows it to his weird small child boy buddy friend of the show Corey Feldman Corey doesn't give it he sees a small cute goblin that has never been reported and is like that's not a big deal he's more into 3d glasses than a new species who credible : really father his mom his friend and his old high school teacher all saw the new cute monster and no one was like that's a thing that doesn't exist and we should talk about this they're like oh cool a new alien what are the rules of feeding it who did you get - he's housebroken don't ever feed him after midnight if my friend showed me a new animal that I literally never seen before and I said it's a Mogwai but I call it gizmo I'd be like Oh gizmo don't name it this what is this thing weeds Oh because there's a new thing all of a sudden and I haven't seen that in a zoo nature documentary or animal book everyone is okay with gizmo in this movie but that's not even close to the weirdest thing title guard specialist is seen real quick firemen came broke through the chimney top and me and mom expecting them to pull out a dead cat or a bird and instead they pulled out my father phoebe cates finally explains why she hates Christmas and it's because her dad died around Christmas climbing down the chimney dressed as Santa he slips and breaks his neck and then stayed in the chimney for a little while until they eventually find him and she concluded this story about her dad disappearing on Christmas and then turning up dead in the chimney with and that's how I found out there's no Santa Claus he slipped and broke his neck died instantly that's how I found out there was no Santa Claus there's a lot to unpack here but I need to sidestep into some context that might eventually explain why I don't have a job here anymore if I'm ever fired in the future I asked Jack O'Brien founder of this website and my boss of a decade if I could do an entire episode of obesity on this one scene and he was like math and then I in an attempt to compromise as if I could do an entire episode of obesity on the movie gremlins and to that he said also no because we only do one obesity a month and gremlins is probably right on the edge of that bubble of things the internet might care about so I shouldn't waste an opcd on the topic that a lot of people might not with and then I in an attempt to not compromise maybe episode anyway because I have some pretty deep issues with authority for which I had been previously reprimanded at this company in the past before but I think at the end of the day sometimes you need to talk about gremlins you understand you get it you're cool you're on my side all right on to the thing Phoebe Cates is Kate decides to share this story in the middle of a monster attack this isn't like a brief moment of calm for them they've been living in a town overrun by gremlins and the police can't help them and we already know that the gremlins have a body count and are free and everywhere and she's just like this is a good time as any you're probably wondering why I hate Christmas and it is weird for a person to hate Christmas I mean it slightly weirder that Billie previously assumed it was a religious thing that sounds like Christmas what are your Hindu or something being another religion doesn't mean you hate other religions holidays Billie get woke but anyway it is weird that she makes a big show out of hating Christmas and maybe Billy was interested in story before at some point but telling it in the middle of a monster war is a really odd choice also ineffective because when she's telling the story of her dad snapping his neck and getting trapped in a chimney let's look at Billy me and mom were decorating the tree waiting for dad to come home from work a couple hours went by dad wasn't home mom called the office no answer honey he is not listening you're pouring your heart out and he is actively checking phones for reception and like objectively half paying attention to you you're like my father Santa Claus and my innocence all died on the same day and he's like mm-hmm all right here yeah parents are the worst my dad's not a whole lot to do you would you check for a phone or a light switch or something to hurt the monsters also Kate you're closer to the story is that's how I learned there's no such thing as Santa what are you you're trying to be cute nobody get a laugh your dad's dead and people are dying around you right ii save the cutesy NPR bolton memoirs the tiny green monsters have hacked into the streetlights double also the story that occurs in the middle of running away from monsters never comes up again it's never even discussed philly doesn't grab her and say oh baby there is a Santa and he's at me I'm Zanna and I and I know who's been naughty and it's the gremlins and so Santa's gonna kill kill some gremlins I guess to bring some kind of poetic closure to your story that doesn't happen he doesn't even say I'm really sorry about that she tells this whole long story about her dad dying in a chimney on Christmas and it never comes up again ever finally also since we're talking about Kate Phoebe Cates is character Kate what's uh Jack's writing this episode of super off the rails Kate has two jobs that we know if she works with Billy at the bank and also works at the bar gremlins take over the town and literally everyone is either like to kill them or let's get out of here because they're Justin Salinger's the tenuous grasp on reality that I previously had and not yet ready to confront worlds where monsters are real two great options Kate meanwhile serves the gremlins at her bar the gremlins show up and instead of saying you don't have IDs and also most of your naked and gross and none of you should be a thing she poured some drinks and light their cigarettes i bartend in a small town before you cut people off when I get too crazy and these monsters our shooting guns at each other also the times when I serve more two inseparable people were times when I anticipated a big tip there is no way they're paying her at all so she would like full-blown get fired after this a bunch of naked gremlins and some hipster gremlins showed up and I in discriminately poured beer and liquor into all their glasses no I didn't have a credit card on file but they seemed too trustworthy hey bad judgment you're gone but here's another weird thing about Kate separate from the other weird things about Kate when daylight approaches all the gremlins go to a dark place to hide because light of any kind kills gremlins the fact that is rarely exploited and they choose a movie theater showing Snow White a classic Christmas movie that theaters routinely replay at Christmas whatever get there in the movie theater and Billy and Kate go there and Billy asks Kate do you know where the boiler room is and she does she knows that the boiler room for this movie theater is behind the screen and through a secret trapdoor in the floor not to turn this into the jobs I've had show but my first job was a movie theater I worked there for three years and I couldn't tell you where the boiler room was I'm in senior management of my current job which I've been doing for ten years and I don't know where the boiler room for our building is right now how in the entire mother does Kate know were the hidden boiler room as for this movie theater meanwhile when they go to the candy and sporting goods store her only job is to find a light switch and all she manages to do is turn on a fountain [Music] gremlins hate lights but they love water how do you manage to remotely turn on a fountain a fairly non-intuitive task but you can't find a light switch have you checked a next to the door where all light switches have been since the beginning of time Kate what's your deal okay do you run this town or don't you what else Wow I read watch this movie recently and I completely forgot that Billy's father was a character like when I thought about the movie I thought about Billy and Phoebe Cates running around and there was gizmo and the bad gremlins until his mom clean up walking his boss living out grandma my god dad Captain America Billy dad didn't make an imprint on me but check us out the movie opens and closes with his narration that's me there on the corner I'm an inventor and I have a story to tell the movie starts with Billy's dad being like this is my story strap in but literally he buys gizmo from a child gives it to his son Billy and then he Andy his narration leave for the rest of the movie that's it he buys gizmo in the beginning and then shows up at the end of the movie after all of the gremlins have been murdered and he has to get gizmo back and after gizmo leaves his narration pops back in to be like anyway that's my story well that's the story man you weren't even in this story he was trying to tell a smokeless ashtray no gas station attendant while the town was under attack this is the filter smokeless ashtray we open and close the narration of a guy who was the least involved in the actual plot of the movie apart from buying gizmo the father is the least important character in this whole film at no point in the production of this film did someone say hey this uh weird noir inner monologue stuff is strange and not a tonal fit and we never revisited again throughout the movie and maybe we should cut it I know the answer the question no no one ever said that they kept it I kept everything they kept it all maybe even the weirder stuff like ponies or my greatest knowing that this classic amazing movie probably could have used a few more drafts at the screenplay stage I missed all the gremlin and gizmo stuff there's a weird subplot about everyone in town struggling with the bank and losing money and there was this horrible old woman who somehow ran the town and was making everyone poor the bank and I have the same purpose in life to make mom not to support a lot of get beat it's a weird it's a wonderful life reference that never bears any fruit a bunch of people are struggling in the town making vague payments and this old woman plus the bank don't seem to care you think that by the end someone would have figured out a way to make money off gremlins and save the town mayor by giving the movie some kind of sense of closure on a problem that occupied the first third of the film but nope also completely separately the woman has twice explicitly in this movie threatened to slowly and painfully murder Billie's dog better keeping behind locked doors because I catch him he's in busloads death I'll take him to the kennel they'll put him to sleep it'll be quick and painless compared to what I could do to him maybe I'll put him in my spin dryer on high heat that'd do it alright and we're all fine with that because she somehow runs this town it's never made clear wonder power of the town is what everyone owes her money and everyone fears her so much that she's allowed to openly get like rock lady hard about torturing a dog to death she eventually gets brutally murdered by the gremlins which I don't know man Who am I supposed to by rooting for this point she wants to murder dogs and she hates Christmas carolers but like murder is wrong and the gremlins are bad and I'd rather she learn a lesson than just get murdered but like I don't even know where function in the movie was does it be mean and dies she was just a powerful but miserable Crone that made our heroes lives inconvenient until she was murdered by the bad guys war is complicated when I'm wise for noticing that oh yeah that's something that always sticks with me gremlins is essentially a horror movie it's a bunch of monsters trying to lay waste to a town in most monster movies we're dealing with a supernatural thing a super-strong thing and that's true of gremlins because they're supernatural but by the end of the movie stripes the main bad gremlin becomes a bigger threat when he picks up a gun love that and I don't know why more horror movies haven't done the same thing he's a scary monster and our heroes are like there's nothing scarier than that he picks up a gun and it's like oh the monsters armed and he just aimed discriminately firing bullets Jason Freddy the aliens they never just pick up a pistol such a natural next step for monsters that most movies completely ignored he was a gremlin he had sharp teeth you ate human flesh that was enough to be scary and then suddenly gone and now it's just a standoff between an unarmed human and a sophisticated monster I don't know why but it's one of my favorite things that the final standoff is it between human with human tools and monster with its innate monster ability but it's a standoff that has nothing to do with our bad guy being a monster it's like if the inevitable Harry and Voldemort standoff ended with Harry being like they didn't see this coming and then he whips out a gun and Voldemort is like but my one weakness I'm sure there's a commentary on how guns are the real monster but this is not the show to make that argument I'm not even supposed to be talking about gremlins so soft ah yes I was ready for this put some amount of time on the clock yo there's a struggling War veteran with PTSD who early in the film said gremlins were taking down our planes in the war and then later when he sees a gremlin he like is one of the gremlins I was talking about from the war that's the same gremlins brought down our planes in the big one that's right whoa would sue so like confirmed gremlins were working against America in the war gremlins next Billy finds a science teacher dead and tells no one connect seriously he goes to the cops who don't believe him about the gremlins he doesn't even try to say don't believe me there's a dead science teacher up at the school right now speaking of cops hey it's Mike from Breaking Bad next what are the rules of that car not trying to be a dick but like how are you driving that does the car that fits you have a functioning gas and brake system if so why never mind here's another thing I'm not sure what you thought you were doing with that wrench in the boiler room but you did it wrong that's not a direction you want to wrench stuff for the outcome you were hoping for Billy since Billy hey Billy since we're talking I have a lot to say about your sexuality and I think you okay that's all for now join us next time when our topic will be where lin-hsu oh boy really trying to get fired I guess okay bye [Music] [Applause] hey everyone thank you for watching that obsessive pop-culture disorder about gremlins and yeah was made before Jack announced that he was leaving so that's why that's weird anyway if you like the show we're doing another show called excessive pop culture discussion where it's me and a couple of these clowns talking about pop culture if you like open CD you'll love be PC day so check it out obviously someone made me do this

Channel: Cracked

Views: 904,084

Rating: 4.9079285 out of 5

Keywords: Gremlins, gizmo, gremlins 2, gremlins full movie, gremlin, Obsessive Pop Culture Disorder, OPCD, Daniel O'Brien, gremlins theme song, Funny, sketch, comedy, funny, cracked, cracked.com, Christmas, joe dante, 6 Reasons, Bizarre, Pop Culture, dark humor black comedies, gremlins clip, gremlins christmas, gremlins films

Id: T2Y39WUcrN4

Length: 15min 4sec (904 seconds)

Published: Mon Jun 26 2017