What Are The biggest Dating Red Flags? (r/AskReddit)

what are some of the relationship red flags you ignored early on I should have realized when she had a negative comment to make about nearly everything that she would eventually be unsatisfied with everything I did I knew a gal like this she also took a stack of pills every morning and told me they were for anxiety I looked them up online the one thing all three had in common was for treatment of manic bipolar disorder the way she flirted with me when she had a boyfriend whatever they'll do for you they'll do to you honestly this seems so simple that there is one selling point in my opinion they didn't show any interest in what was important to me I was raised to believe that if something was important to my significant other then it was important to me if they enjoyed ballet dancing chick flicks country music insert activity I have no interest in I would do my best to support them and find interest in it it just shows their willingness to be supportive and to try and look at the world through my eyes it shows they want to share something with me even if it isn't their first choice it shows above all else that they can be selfless luckily my music and writing are such a big part of my life that if my significant other doesn't show interest in either I immediately know to move on this is what ruined my relationship I learned the hard way that narcissism can display itself in many ways she never gained me any compliments or thanked me for anything unpredictable and aggressive criticism for minor mistakes ex rinsing pasta after boiling it won she was still living with her ex-boyfriend and I ignored that cementing myself in my mind as the blindest dumbest man novel time always texting when we were together that never goes away texting when out to dinner is the most infuriating thing that I routinely have to put up with if I'm not interesting enough then GTFO and don't eat the meal I'm paying for my first serious college gf accused me of flirting with a high school friend of mine another girl bc of some facebook posts we exchanged she claimed that I was trying to start for a and ships with every girl I'd know from high school and just got lucky with my GF when I asked her about it she claimed that she had just stumbled upon it randomly which would be feasible but when I went onto the site to see how that could have happened she would have had to go back six months into my comment history to find it a time when we weren't even dating yet she turned out to be insanely insecure one he liked to pinch me later that turned into a playful pushing and a little bit of gentle slapping I dumped him after he jokingly cornered me in his basement and shot hockey pucks at me OMG so funny - he texted me at least three times a day with what you're doing turns out he was incredibly controlling and jealous her stupidity is cute at the beginning but after a few years it finally gets you to a point of a breakdown it is quite adorable at first she's cute she says silly little things that make you laugh even if it's at her after a while it becomes infuriating someday you'll snap one girl I liked because she had the whole independent woman vibe unfortunately her independence meant she always took priority over everything no matter what independence was just a mask for her selfishness she wanted to go out drinking with her friends on Thursday fine go enjoy yourself honey she can't see me because she wants to visit home on the weekends that's cool you're living your own life and I don't want to impede on that family is important you're canceling our date for the third time this week because you rather attend other things with your friends that's fine I don't want you to stop hanging out with your friends you want to visit your childhood guy friend for the weekend who I always thought you were a little too a roo close to who lives about two hours away okay the weekend I wanted to spend together you know the one where I cancelled a trip home for my mom's birthday the one before you were leaving to Europe for four months for once I thought you were going to do something for me you come up with the worst excuse to cancel I have to go shopping with my mom the minute I complain about it and now that I think about it it was the only time I complained about anything you get angry say spiteful things and to top it all off dump me days before your study abroad trip to Europe which I helped you apply for and supported you in every step of the way both financially and emotionally I conceded and gave up so many things for this independent woman and now that I reflect back on it it was the worst relationship of my life now whenever a woman flaunts about how independent she is I turned the other cheek and look for someone that actually has some love to give that's not what turn the other cheek means he was arrogant and treated other people like dirt unless they had something to offer him he treated me like a queen until he found my replacement narcissism sucks my ex was a Holocaust denier heck that's a red flag if I ever saw one she got way too drunk each and every time we went out I learned that is there's a flag for a lot of issues a bit early lying to other people equals habitually lying to me he that will steal an egg will steal an ox I thought the fact that she was so close to her dad was kind of nice and a really positive aspect of her personality as the relationship progressed I realized that what she was looking for in a sir was someone who she could turn into her own version of dad an immediate need to establish themselves as being in your future forever when we build your house you know the one you've been saving up money for some years now we should have four bedrooms so we can have two kids and maybe you should build a bed-and-breakfast so I can run at this claim three weeks into the relationship way to plus with his best friend regularly ignored me to spend time with him for example we once went to a restaurant with a group of friends he got a table that could see two people with the friend and left me to sit with the others this pattern continued for a while you can probably figure out what eventually happened she didn't give fellatio but loved getting it as juvenile and chauvinistic as it sounds it was a solid indicator of the effort she was willing to give me in relation to the effort she expected from me completely agree with this one if a guy is Andy go and excited to go down on me the he isn't bringing the same level of Awesome freakin to the table he doesn't have to be good mind you that can be taught intention is more important one a lack of manners and consideration toward individuals in service jobs waiters bank tellers the person and the drive up to does not want to spend time with your friends and family which often coincides with you never being introduced to their friends and family three she is extremely interested in your material possessions the model of car you drive is very important for wants to hang out but never wants to do anything physical five only seems to want to come over for physical play never wants to actually hang out six angry when discussing anything in their past additionally they are angry when discussing anything they don't particularly like or agree with seven a complete lack of stability in their life in general cannot hold a job finish a project eight try to keep you from doing things you love I wish you'd spend less time doing martial arts and more time hanging out with me nine they are never punctual and are terrible about returning calls ten they are interested in changing your belief system set of values to something they would like I've learned quite a bit over the years she said the victims of 9/11 deserved what they got yet seriously I should have learned right than that she was just a self-centered bee that said outrageous things to attract attention I wasted two years of my life with her instead awesome I dismissed now he treated his mom like crap even though she did literally everything for him down to registering him for his college courses because he wouldn't do it himself come to find it's true that men treat women their intimate with similarly to the way they treat their moms he also flat out refused most of the time to hang out with my friends and was always saying his friends were better but always wanted me to hang out with his friends to a point where it felt like he and I never had time to ourselves in spite of those things we dated for almost two years though if I were given the opportunity to do it over I wouldn't have any part of it I think you were smart to get away much better to date grown-ups she was extremely moody like one minute she would tear someone apart then the next she would help pay for the surgery of someone's dying grandparent on some days she would be such a self praising jackass that I could hardly stand it she also rarely straight from topics that took hold in her her mind any thought which went against it was immediately thrown out regardless I was visiting her every day basically sometimes multiple times still much better than dig though I think we are dating the same girl he complained about everything I did if it wasn't his way it was wrong had nothing good to say about any female he knew once everything to be about him but not about me controlling with everything from bedtimes to money prude jealous over everything but can have lovers and friends easily angered over trifles refuses to spend time with me but want my every waking moments to be with him mismatch in libidos feeling like your relationship is a friendship is cool and all but the physical components need to be there too this is a huge red flag it's a nightmare to feel like you're begging you're so for physical intimacy in high school the more eyebrows 4chan the more I understand about you vo so attentive I will take care of you behavior that turned into him being total control freaking that I never got to talk to anyone including family or look at anyone especially waiters or anyone who might attempt to pay any kind of attention I would actually deny knowing people who I hadn't seen in a while to attempt to not have a fight or even have a job no money to leave with it finally left with $40 to my name a what clothes I could fit in my car never ever looked back also married and divorced a bipolar man never ever trust a man who says the only thing they can't resist his temptation they weren't lying my then-boyfriend had a habit of commenting on how his life has no meaning he spoke off suicide a few times but I would always change the subjects and thought that as long as he knew I loved him he would get over it in hindsight I was Eve about two things one I could change a man into that love is enough stopped someone from committing suicide he never did when I finally got the courage to break up with him despite the constant fear that he was going to off himself one day I had a girlfriend that hated Chris Farley and thought Tommy Boy was an abortion of the cinema should have known right there oh and on a lesser note she burned her parents house down serious depression hinting that they'd commit suicide if I left them terribly impulsive behavior run for the hills this is the relationship that taught me never to stick my dong in crazy I dated a man that was this way the break-up was terrifying I dated this guy who could never let me be right about anything even if he agreed on the topic he'd always play devil's advocates to get me to think other things poor grammar bad dating history and cleansiness I'm guilty of this sometimes I'll admit I bet many redditors are I do it occasionally because it annoys the heck out of me to hear someone who spells a strong opinion when I think they only held that opinion because everyone else does or they haven't thought through that opinion very clearly I tend to do it even if I agree with them I guess it's a bad habit I now consider it a red flag when I date a girl who mostly has guy friends this means maybe the random girl but for the most part all guys usually they end up being very insecure and loved male attention a little too much it also sucks because in the end at least half of their friends are secretly in love with them and end up hating me as a result no fun I am a female who has always been skeptical of the girl who yells from the rooftops how she's one of the guys or hates girls cuz girls are all drama it's then they have issues not always but a good amount of the time she always had to include my ethnicity whenever referencing me literally any time she said boyfriend that was preceded by Asian I'm not even a real Asian he didn't like my sister or my mum or my brother come to think of it and let me know about it all the time but if I even mentioned anything remotely annoying about his family it was like I slapped him across the face he resented me because my family had more money than his what am I supposed to do apologize for the fact my dad worked his ass off for 30 years on oil rigs oh and he never ever trusted me because his first girlfriend cheated on him I thought maybe I could be the one to regain his trust to help him realize no not all girls are cheating skanks nope he just cheated on me instead should have realized when all he talked about was football and halo that we would have nothing in common in my defense it was high school and my self-esteem was so low I didn't think anyone else would want me it turns out he was in butthole big surprise I finally grew a backbone when he made a fat joke about my best friend at my 16th birthday party and she ended up crying friends before stupid relationships always she never asked a single question about me on our first few dates just kept going on about herself you can imagine how that worked out had this happen again recently and decided not to call that girl after the second date lesson equals learned when I'm high school we had these practice partner AP tests my girlfriend and I were always partners I realized now that she wasn't very intelligent and she only played the part every time we had a disagreement on a certain question my opinion was always the one that was thrown out and hers was used instead this always bothered me and I should have brought more attention to it especially since we were getting most of them wrong good hey she was willing to kiss me and that was worth the seasoned B's instead of the A's at the time I wished I had broken up with her then instead of doing it a year later and wasting my whole first year of college on a dying relationship also she had smelly armpits TL DR girl with smelly armpits made me second-guess myself the bulge in her pants I am normal and I carry a backpack full of green flags around with me this is a red flag jealousy she had many guy friends was not thrilled about me having any lady friends before I started dating my gf she cheated on her then current boyfriend with me guess what she cheated on me multiple times definitely shouldn't have seen that one coming she also cheated on me with said former boyfriend seriously WTF was I thinking I saw red flags in every relationship but again no one is perfect I was choosing the faults I could live with and try to fix my own as long my partner understands that it's all about making each other happy I'm cool the things I couldn't live with his lies fights and ignorance there is no reason to lie unless you doing something really bad any argument could be fixed if you listen to each other and sometimes you do have to give something up for the sake of the person you care about one double standards about everything too and willingness to try new things three has to plan for every second of the day for too much emotional reliance not emotionally independent five judges people because of superficial imperfections six lacks true depth intelligence seven only watches reality television eight can't appreciate well-written entertainment is too confusing nine uninterested in anything that doesn't affect them directly 10 face books talks too much 11 worries constantly 12 obsessed with fairy tale endings beginnings and realistic expectations do I need to say more honestly I'm getting to the point where if red flags show up early on it's not a relationship worth pursuing he said I love you on the second date I was already sure it can't go anywhere even more blatantly when I dropped him off after our first date but he asked for a goodnight kiss if it was coming you'd know buddy B he took my I don't really kiss on first dates for she needs more convincing C tried persuasion D eventually suggested a rock-paper-scissors compromise yet he said he didn't like ending dates without a kiss that should have been a sign I see it all the time and have experienced it and it's mostly guys who do this to their girls for some reason but when a guy gets annoyed at practically everything the girl dumps and yells at them for saying something stupid multiple times a night and just plain doesn't seem interested at all in the girl that's when you know a relationship is getting sour if you are new to the channel you can subscribe I publish new videos every day until then check another video [Music] [Music] bye for now [Music]

Channel: On Tap Studios

Views: 21,707

Rating: 4.8593407 out of 5

Keywords: relationship, relationship goals, relationship advice, relationship problems, relationship red flags, shouldnt ignore, #updootst, updoot, reddit, r/askreddit, askreddit, ask reddit, r/, \r, r\, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit story, top posts, funniest posts, funny, funny posts, funny askreddit, reddit funny, askreddit funny, askreddit stories, sub, reddit cringe, memes, comment awards, dankify, toadfilms, updoot everything, updoot reddit, chill, story, stories, reddit on tap

Id: KDS3hlZA9WE

Length: 18min 55sec (1135 seconds)

Published: Sun Jun 07 2020